After sitting on the couch for about an hour watching Ari play, Will contemplated what he needed to do next. He knew that Sonny wanted him to stay at the apartment and wait for him, but Will wasn't sure how long Sonny was going to be out. It still hurt him to be in the apartment after their fight, and Will wasn't completely sure he wanted to come home right away. He still needed time, and he needed to be able to look at Sonny and not think about him cheating. Not think about him being in bed with another man, loving another man.
On the other hand, he couldn't keep carting Ari around, taking her back and forth from place to place. He had that growing up, and he always promised himself that he wouldn't let that happen when he had kids. Ari needed to feel secure and know where her home was. He also felt that if Sonny was truly committed to making their marriage work, then he needed to show Sonny that he wanted them to work as well. Maybe they needed to take a step back, sleep separately for a while, but they needed to be together.
His was pulled out of his thoughts by his phone ringing. It was his boss, Zoe. She was probably waiting on an update for the article. He ignored the call and let it go to voicemail. He couldn't deal with any thoughts of the article at the moment. She was probably upset that he had not gotten back to her sooner, as she expected the article in a few days, but he honestly didn't care. He would write the article, without the scandalous information they probably were hoping for, and then he decided he would take a step back. A step back from the person he was becoming, and try to figure out what he wanted for his career. He was ashamed of a lot of the things he had done as a writer, and if it saved his marriage, maybe it was worth giving this up as a career. He could still write a blog, possibly stories, but being a reporter and doing what he had been has only caused him pain.
His phone rang again, and this time it was his Grandma Marlena, so he answered it.
"Hi Grandma."
"Hello, Will. How are you?"
"I'm fine. How are you?"
"I'm okay. I was wondering if you were available to meet. I haven't seen you in a while, and I thought we could sit down and talk."
"Um, now is actually not a good time. Ari needs to go down for her nap soon, and Sonny is out at the club so I need to stay here with her."
"That's okay, I can come by the apartment. I can be there in 20 minutes."
"Ah, okay then. I will see you when you get here."
He hung up the phone, and realized there seemed something off about his grandma's tone. He wasn't quite sure what it was. He decided he would figure it out when she got to the apartment, and spent the 20 minutes it took for her to get there by calmly rocking Ari and settling her down for her nap.
She was almost out in his arms when there was knock at the door. He carefully opened the door and signaled for Marlena to be quiet as Ari was dozing. She quietly walked in and lovingly looked at both Will and Ari. Will walked over to Ari's room and laid her down in her crib, carefully. He watched her for a moment, and when he realized she was asleep, he quietly walked out to see Marlena.
She had sat down on the couch, and when she looked up at him, she asked, "She asleep?"
"Yeah, out like a light. She had a busy morning."
When he looked at Marlena as he said the words "busy morning", he realized suddenly why she was over at the apartment.
"You know."
"Know what?" she asked, puzzled.
"Grandma. You know what I am talking about. You know about Sonny and me."
He looked down at his lap, unable to look at his grandmother anymore. He knew she came over to talk about it, but he wasn't quite sure he was ready to. After all the talking that had gone on that day, he didn't know if he had the energy to keep talking about it.
"Yes. Your father called me, concerned about you. Then Adrienne called me, concerned about Sonny."
Will was surprised to hear about Adrienne calling Marlena, but then he realized that Sonny must have talked to her.
"Will? Can you look at me?"
Will looked over at her, looking ashamed and embarrassed. To his horror, more tears began to run down his face.
"Oh my dear boy. Come here." She opened her arms and pulled him against her.
He cried, and the whole story came out. About how he and Sonny were struggling in their marriage, fighting and couldn't seem to communicate, how the financial struggles were weighing in on Sonny, and how Sonny cheated on Will with his ex-boyfriend after drinking. Then about the fight they had afterwards, and the vicious words Sonny spewed at Will in a drunken rage. All the pain Will had been feeling came pouring out, and he told her how he felt that he wasn't sure they could get through this. That he feared Sonny was still in love with Paul, and he didn't know how to get past and let go of what had happened.
Marlena just sat on the couch and listened, every once in a while rubbing his back or calming him back down when he sobbed. Her heart broke at the pain her grandson was in. While she knew that he was in part to blame for the mess his marriage was in, she knew he loved his husband with all his heart. He was just a little too much like Sami. He let his emotions control him and doesn't always think before he acts. But it was times like this that she was reminded of the lost boy who came to her, not speaking to his mother and afraid because he had just kissed a guy and enjoyed it. He wanted to be accepted by others, to show that he was deserving of good things happening to him.
Will eventually calmed down, and pulled away from Marlena. He wiped his face with his forearm, looking away from his grandmother.
"I'm sorry."
Marlena was confused. "Why are you sorry?"
"You must be disappointed with me. My marriage is failing."
"Oh my dear boy. I am not disappointed with you. Why would you think that?"
"Because this is my fault. I let my marriage get this bad. I don't know how, but it happened. And now I don't know what to do. How do I move forward with Sonny if he is in love with another man?"
"Will, do you honestly believe that Sonny is in love with someone else? The way that he is in love with you? Because I don't. It doesn't matter what past they have or what happened. The only thing that matters right now how you decide to move forward. I believe that man loves you with his whole heart. He got into a bad place, and said some horrible things, and now regrets it. The question is can you let go of what has happened?"
Marlena looks a Will for a moment, letting him take what she is saying in. She then continues.
"You need to decide what is best for you, Sonny, and that little girl resting in her room. Both you and Sonny have let things get in the way and have forgotten that you are a family. It is not just about you anymore, and it is not just about Sonny anymore. You two need to talk to each other more, spend time together, and be honest with each other."
Will nodded, still looking down at his lap. He especially had become so focused on getting his career started that he completely disregarded his priorities of his family. Maybe that was where they should start.
"Sonny and I agreed that we need to start going to counseling."
"I think that is a wonderful idea. I can recommend someone if you want. It would probably be better for the two of you if you went to a neutral person. Someone you are not already emotionally connected with."
"Thanks, grandma. I agree with you on the neutral person. And thank you for coming over. I'm really glad we talked."
Will smiled at her, and Marlena smiled back and hugged him. "Of course. I am always here whenever you need me."
The two talked for a few more minutes, before Marlena left, telling Will she would look into a few marriage counselors to see who would be available to see them. She also told Will that the two of them may want to also see individual counseling as well, and that maybe the counselor they see could do that as well. Will thanked her and told her he would talk to Sonny about it.
After she left, Will checked on Ari to make sure she was still sleeping, then sat back on the couch. The whole day had worn him out, but he had a lot to think about. He still wasn't ready to forgive Sonny for cheating on him, or for the things he said, but he felt that given time, he could. It was amazing how two days could change a lot for him. Now he just needed to figure out what road he was going to go down.
He wasn't sure when Sonny would get back from the club, and that brought on the question of what was he going to do? He couldn't sleep in the same bed as Sonny, especially not their bed, but being in the apartment wasn't as bad as he thought. Ari was certainly happier here, and he knew if he kept staying at other places, people would eventually find out something was wrong. Maybe it was crazy to think, but he wondered if maybe they could solve their problems before too many people found out what had happened. Whenever something scandalous like this happened, people immediately picked sides or barged into the situation to give their opinions. He didn't want people's opinions. That was what usually led to more trouble. There were a few that mattered to him, and that he needed to talk to, as did Sonny, but that was it. Hopefully the fewer people that knew, the less likely the situation would get out of control.
He looked over at the clock and realized he hadn't eaten anything that day since breakfast. He decided to try and make something. He couldn't really cook, but he could heat up any leftovers they had. They didn't have a lot, so he just made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich and got a glass of milk. He didn't feel like he could eat a whole lot of food anyway. There was too much on his mind, and too much going on around him.
He ate the sandwich, but could barely taste it. He hated this feeling, this back and forth of feeling okay about everything and then feeling depressed about the situation. Maybe the individual counseling, at least for him, would be good as well. His grandmother was right in the fact that he and Sonny needed to start thinking as a team again, and needed to remember that they had Ari to consider. On top of everything else they had to worry about, financially they were strapped tight. He knew he could ask his family for help, but he didn't want to depend on them. If they got desperate, however, he would ask them. Ari didn't deserve to be burdened because her daddies were in a mess.
He was pulled from his thoughts by the sounds of Ari waking up. He went in to her, got her changed and brought her out to get her some dinner. She was such a happy go lucky little girl that it was hard to be sad or upset around her.
The moment that he began to feed her was the moment that he heard the door opening. He and Ari both turned to see Sonny walking through the door.
"Look whose back Ari? It's daddy Sonny." It felt so natural to say something like that with Sonny and Ari, and yet it made him feel sad.
Sonny smiled at the two of them, and he felt so elated that Will and Ari were still in the apartment. But the question was, were they staying?
Author's note- Another two chapters for you all. Thank you again to everyone who has reviewed or has been following my story.
One side note- I don't want to spoil it for anyone who has not watched Days this week, but I cannot believe what is happening on the show. I know drama is necessary, and maybe this is just me, but I don't understand why Will did what he did. It almost seems like we are supposed to hate the character.
Anyway, excuse my rant. Please review and I hope you all enjoy the continuation of Learning to Dance in the Rain. More to come soon, I promise!