While she slept, a slideshow of images played in her head, taunting her, making her squirm, flashing back and forth. Images of KC's clenched fist coming at her. Images of her father. Images of every knife she dragged across her arm, every bottle she pressed to her lips, every single pill she popped.
She couldn't take it anymore. She forced herself to wake up, slowly opening her eyes to find herself staring at Eli. He was sitting next to her, his emerald eyes pained.
"I-I…what?" She stammered out, looking around the room in a daze. She tried to prop herself up but yelped in pain and fell back, her arm stinging.
A rush of memories flooded back to her as she remembered everything that had happened. She let out a gasp as tears welled up in her eyes. How could KC do that to her? And Eli. He had been there for her all along, always catching her when she fell, no matter what she did.
"I love you." She breathed out, tears dropping to the couch. She curled up into his chest and cried. He didn't ask questions, just wrapped his arms around her and pulled her closer to him.
The crying soon subsided and she pulled away, staring at him for a long moment, not saying anything. Eli broke the silence.
"Are you hungry?" He asked. Clare's stomach growled in response and she nodded. He gave her a kiss on the cheek that wasn't bruised and disappeared into the kitchen. Clare wasted no time in reaching for her suitcase and pulling out a clear bottle, taking a few gulps and throwing it back in. Five minutes later Eli came out carrying a bowl of soup.
She ate quickly, surprised at how hungry she was. She wasn't sure how long it'd been since she'd eaten a proper meal. She always seemed to forget she needed to eat. Eli cleared his throat.
"Clare, what…what happened last night?" He asked her quietly. There was pain in his voice that killed Clare when she heard it.
"You promise not to do anything stupid?" She asked nervously. He nodded. She flashed back to the night before and launched herself into the story.
"I was staying at Bianca's house. I had just gotten back after seeing you and she told me I had to find another place to stay because she was moving in with her boyfriend." She paused, struggling to get her words out.
"I packed my things and I was walking down the street. I had no clue where I was gonna go. I saw Fitz standing in an alley." Eli's fists clenched. Clare ignored it.
"He called me over and I realized that he was with Owen and…KC." Eli nodded, confused by the pain in her eyes when she had said the jock's name.
"I walked over. They were all drunk. Fitz was teasing me about being out so late. KC came up to me and pushed me up against the wall. He t-told me that he had m-missed me and kissed my neck." She stopped, tears in her eyes. Eli clenched his fists again.
"I pushed him off of me and he…he came at me and…punched me in the face. And then he grabbed his beer bottle and threw it at me. It reopened a few cuts. And then they all ran." She was sobbing now, trying to get a hold of herself. Eli was furious. How dare this guy lay a finger on his Clare.
He stood up, fists clenched, but Clare pulled him back down.
"You promised you wouldn't do anything stupid." She said, looking at him with a worried expression. Suddenly the front door opened. A middle aged man stepped through the door. He looked like an older version of Eli.
"Eli, sorry to drop in on such short-" He stopped mid-sentence, looking up from his phone to see Clare sitting on the couch.
"Uh, hi Dad." Eli said, jumping up from the couch. His father had a confused expression etched on his face as he looked between Clare and Eli.
"Who's this?" He asked slowly, pointing at Clare. Eli composed his face.
"This is my girlfriend, Clare. She just came over so we could go get breakfast." He lied smoothly. Clare smiled and waved.
"Why does she have a bruise on her face?" His father asked him. This time Clare jumped in.
"I fell down at school. I can be clumsy sometimes." She joked with forced laughter. Eli's father smiled slightly.
"Well, okay. I was just stopping by to drop off some money and check in on things." He said, holding up an envelope. Eli grabbed the envelope from him.
"Thanks, Dad." He said, faking a smile. There was an awkward silence, a brief tense moment.
"Do you want me to stay in town and get some food?" He asked.
"No, it's fine. I'll go grocery shopping later. You can get back to work." Eli said, a slight edge to his voice.
"Alright, well I'm gonna head out then. I'll see you soon." He said, opening the door. Eli gave a quick nod and watched him walk away. He let out a sigh as soon as the door closed. He shook his head and walked over to where Clare was sitting.
"Well, that's Dad. In and out whenever he wants." There was bitterness to his voice. In truth, he felt what his father was doing could almost be considered abandonment.
"You know I have to punch that KC guy in the face, right?" He said, turning to look at Clare. Clare's expression turned to panic.
"No! Eli, you can't! It's not worth it." He sat down next to her and looked her straight in the eye.
"You're worth it." He said quietly, leaning in and kissing her. He got up and walked out the door, getting in his car and driving away.
She ran over to her suitcase, yanking out the little orange pill bottle. She knew it was wrong. She knew Eli would be disappointed. But she couldn't help it.
FadeAway
Eli saw him, standing behind the Dot with Jenna. She was crying, but Eli didn't seem to notice. He parked the car, getting out and slamming the door. Neither noticed Eli. He heard KC shouting.
"How is this for the best in any possible way, Jenna? Do you even hear yourself?" He yelled. Eli ran up to them.
"I swear, if you ever fucking touch Clare again!" He yelled, pulling his fist back and punching KC in the jaw. KC stumbled backwards, but regained balance and knocked Eli to the ground.
"KC, what is he talking about?" Jenna shouted accusingly. The question caught KC off guard long enough for Eli to get up and punch him in the gut. KC fell to the ground. Eli crouched down and lowered his voice to almost a whisper.
"If you ever hurt her again, you're gonna wish you were never born." He threatened, his voice menacing. He didn't wait for KC to respond and stood up. He gave Jenna a long look. Tears were running down her face. Without saying anything, Eli walked away, leaving the dysfunctional couple behind the Dot.
When he got in his car, he saw his reflection in the rearview mirror. He had a minor cut on his lip, but not much else. It didn't matter anyway. Clare was worth it.
FadeAway
She was fading, disappearing, just like she always feared she would. Where was Eli? He had made a promise that he wouldn't let her fade. Another pill. The bottle was empty. She was getting tired. She could barely keep her eyes open.
Eli opened the door. She was clutching the pill bottle, afraid that it was the only thing keeping her there.
"Clare, what the hell happened?" He asked, staring in shock at the empty pill bottle.
"You promised me you wouldn't let me fade." She whispered. It didn't take a genius to figure out what Clare had done. He picked her up and ran out to his hears, laying her in the backseat before getting behind the wheel and driving as fast as he could to the hospital.
"I love you, Eli." She whispered as she drifted into unconsciousness.
If I die young bury me in satin The ballad of a dove The sharp knife of a short life, well
Lay me down on a bed of roses
Sink me in the river at dawn
Send me away with the words of a love song
Go with peace and love
Gather up your tears, keep them in your pocket
Save them for a time when your really gonna need them
I've had just enough time