Mission: Almost Impossible
Disclaimer: I don't own anything except the story. Everything else is owned by Capcom. Oh, wait a minute. I own the new guy.
Summary: Leon and Krauser are the best agents President Graham has had in years, but he sends them on missions even I could do.
EDIT 1/6/07: You may have noticed some things have changed in this chapter, like Blade's attire and him not being so...emotionless? Well, that's not exactly the word, but it's the only one I can think of right now. ; Anyway, the reason I changed his outfit was cuz at the time, I thought it looked somewhat cool, and in a later chapter I changed it cuz I realized how sucky that would look, so now I decided to change it in this chappy and delete the part in the later chapter where it says his outfit changed. As for the way he acts...When I first created him, I didn't really care about what his personality was like or anything, I just thought the story needed a black haired guy in a trenchcoat. But later, I got to like him and it got me thinking, 'I don't want him to be some monotonous person. I want him to be tough, but also have a bit of a soft spot.' I didn't like the way he was, so I changed his personality a bit, but I never actually edited anything where pretty much everything he said was either rude-ish or monotonous. So, there ya go.
Chapter 10: The New Guy
For the past three days, the White House was abuzz with excitement. Some guy was being transferred from the L.A.P.D. to become one of the President's new agents. Millions of rumors went around from agent to agent who usually spent their time at the White House.
The most common rumors were that the guy was an ex-con, he was insane, he was retarded, or that he was married.
Today was the day for him to arrive and everyone was more excited than before.
"So did you hear, Krauser?" The brunette asked.
The older agent raised an eyebrow. "Hear what?"
"That new agent is really Nemesis!"
"Oh, my God!" There was a slight pause before Krauser continued. "Who the hell is Nemesis?"
"He's this tyrant thing created by Umbrella. I heard it from some guy who knows Claire Redfield."
"Claire? Oh, your girlfriend."
"Damn it, Krauser, she's not my girlfriend!"
"Oh, that's right. Ashley is."
"She's not either!"
"Well who is?"
"No one! I'm single at the moment."
"That doesn't surprise me."
"Shut up, Krauser..."
"Well, it's true. Sometimes you sleep in nothing but a pink boxers."
"Cuz it's sexy!"
Krauser shook his head. "No, it's not. It's gay."
Leon pointed at his friend. "Well, you're gay!"
"Leon! Krauser!"
The two agents turned their heads when their names were called.
Wesker ran up to them, seeming almost excited.
"Guys," He panted. "I know something about the new agent that no one else does!"
"...Why are you even bothering to tell us when we hate you and you hate us?" Leon asked.
"Cuz," The blond put his arms around both of the agents' shoulders. "You guys are like my family. You see, my family didn't love or hate me. They just acted as if I didn't exist. Having you guys hate me shows me that you really care."
"...So let me get this straight. Krauser and I are like your family cuz we hate you. Does that me you're showing us you care by hating us?"
"No. I just hate you." The blond took his arms off of the agents' shoulders. "Anyway, as I was saying earlier, I know something about the new agent that no one else knows."
"He's gay like Leon?" Krauser asked, then got punched in the arm by the brunette. "Ow!"
"No. He is an aced gunman and he has a black belt in karate."
Leon snorted. "Get real, Wesker. There's no such thing as a guy who has a black belt in karate and is an aced gunman."
"Well this guy is!"
One of the doors opened and Ashley entered the room.
"Leon, Krauser, Daddy wants to see you." She said, then giggled in excitement. "You two get to meet the new agent."
"Cool! Come on, Krauser!" The brunette grabbed his friend by the arm and almost literally dragged him out, knocking Ashley down in the hustle.
"Uh...what about me?" Wesker asked.
"Screw you, Wesker." The blonde replied before getting up and exiting the room.
President Graham sighed when he heard frantic footsteps coming down the hall, towards his office.
'Five...' He counted in his head. 'Four...Three...Two...One...Zero...'
Right when he got to zero, the doors were thrown open and Leon, Krauser, and Ashley entered the room, shortly followed by Wesker.
"What are you doing here, Wesker?" Graham asked.
"I wanted to see the new guy." was the blond's answer.
"Oh. Well, he's not here yet."
Everyone groaned in response.
The President held up his hand. "Now, now. He'll be here shortly."
Someone knocked on the door frame, causing everyone's gaze to shift to the door.
'Oh, my God! The new guy!' Everyone thought.
The man at the door had to have been either as taller or an inch or two taller than Leon. His height was increased a little bit by the black hat he wore on his head with an orange band around it. His black hair came down to the small of his back and appeared to be well taken care of.
He was sporting a black trench coat, the end coming down just above his ankles. His black pants seemed tight around his thighs, showing off the defined muscles there, but was loose the rest of the way down. The black shoes he wore were shiny and brand new looking, yet Ashley could tell they were of a discontinued brand. He wore fingerless black gloves on his hands, just like every other mysterious looking guy would. His white skin tight shirt shown off his chest quite nicely. He looked tough, though his expression was hard to read with the framless black sunglasses over his eyes.
"Sorry I'm late, Mr. President. The traffic was backed up for miles." The man said, pushing some of his bangs out of his view.
"That's okay." The President stood up. "Everyone, this is Blade Stryker. Blade...this is everyone."
'Wow, he's hot.' Ashley thought.
'What's with the black and orange?' Leon thought.
'Oh, my God! He's hot! If anyone thinks he's hotter than me, I'll kick his ass until he looks like Michael Jackson!' Krauser thought. 'Wait a minute...I like Michael Jackson.'
'So he wears sunglasses, too. Maybe I should ask him later if he wants to join the Sunglasses Club.' Wesker thought.
'Holy shit! That guy has the grooviest clothes I've ever seen! I've gotta ask him where he buys his clothes.' Graham thought.
'Why the hell is everyone staring at me like that? Oh, God, I hope those guys aren't gay. I'm so sick of homos stalking me.' Blade thought.
President Graham cleared his throat. "Leon, Krauser, Blade. Why don't you guys take the rest of the day off to get acquainted?"
Leon's eyes went wide and a smile appeared on his face. "Really?"
"Why?" Krauser asked.
The President signaled for the two of them to come over to his desk. The two agents complied and leaned in close when Graham motioned for them to come even closer.
"As far as I'm concerned, I don't care if you guys get acquainted or not. I just want you two to make a good impression." Graham whispered. "He's staying for a week and if he doesn't like it here, he'll leave but if he does likes it, he'll stay for good. Understand?"
"What's in it for us?" Krauser asked.
"I'll give you guys a big bonus in your paycheck next week."
"Come on, Blade! Let's go have some fun!" The older agent cried, shoving Blade out the door in a friendly manner.
"I HATE red lights!" Krauser groaned.
"I know. We've been sitting here for at least ten minutes." Leon said, then looked over his shoulder at Blade. "Blade, you've been real quiet back there."
"I couldn't get a word in with him talking endlessly." Blade replied.
Krauser growled. "Don't make me come back there!"
The brunette smacked him in the back of the head. "Never mind Krauser. So, what kind of skills do ya got?"
"I'm very good with guns and I'm quite good at throwing daggers. I'm also very good at karate. I was the best in my class. After all, I got my black belt after just three weeks.
'Three weeks! Is this guy even human?' The brunette mentally asked himself.
'Oh, my God! Wesker was right!' Krauser thought. 'But the question is...how DID he know? Maybe he's psychic like that Miss Cleo chick.'
"Oooh! Green light!" The younger agent stepped on the gas, but not hard enough to make the Invisi-Car go over the speed limit.
"Who taught you all the stuff you know?" The older agent asked.
"Various people. Mostly I taught myself all the moves I know." The gunman answered.
"When did you join the L.A.P.D.?"
"Seven years ago."
"You seem pretty young. How old are you?"
"Twenty four."
"Twenty four! That means you were-" Krauser thought for a second. "Holy shit! You were seventeen when you joined the force!"
"That's right. So what?"
"So you were a part of the L.A.P.D.?" Leon asked, quickly changing the subject in hopes that Krauser wouldn't start freaking out about Blade's age when he joined the L.A.P.D.
"Yeah." The gunman answered numbly. "It wasn't good enough for me. I had to patrol the streets and nothing ever happens on the streets. Well...nothing good."
"Have you ever done something hard? Like stop a terrorist or something?"
"Stopping a terrorist is so easy, a mere child could do it. If you think it's hard, there's something wrong with you."
The brunette gripped the steering wheel tightly and his eye twitched in anger.
"Uh...Leon, how about we take Blade to our house?" The older agent suggested, hoping the drive there would calm the brunette down.
The younger agent shrugged. "Eh, why not?"
Blade raised an eyebrow. "This is your home?"
"Yeah. Isn't it great?" Krauser asked, sighing in contentment as he lay on the couch.
The gunman certainly didn't think their house suited as a home. It was filthier than a dumpster. Well, garbage wasn't all strewn about, but junk and clothes and dirty dishes sure were.
'How can anyone live like this?' Blade thought grimly. 'It's worst than the slums of L.A.'
"Sorry about the mess." Leon said. "We've kinda gotten lazy these past few days."
'Days? This big mess was made in just a matter of days? It looks more like weeks, if you ask me.' Blade made a grim face when he saw a rat crawl out of a pile of dirty socks. 'Please, Lord, let me make it out of here alive.'
"Want something to drink?" The brunette called from the kitchen.
"No." The gunman said, watching as the rat pulled a bone from a KFC container and brought it back into the dirty sock pile.
"How about something to eat?"
Blade was hungry, but when he saw a cockroach swimming in a tub of melted ice cream while wearing tiny swim trunks, he lost his appetite completely.
"I'm not that hungry anymore." He replied, sounding somewhat sick.
Leon walked into the room, holding a can of soda. "What's with the sunglasses?"
"What about them?"
"You haven't taken them off once since I first saw you. Do you have some kind of disease like Wesker? Well, at least I think he has a disease."
Blade sighed, closing his eyes. "If you must know..." He slowly took off his sunglasses and reopened his eyes. The irises were orange.
"Holy shit!" Leon cried, throwing his drink into the air only to have it land in the fish aquarium.
The gunman quickly put his sunglasses back on and turned away from Leon.
"I'm sorry...It's just-"
"No need to apologize." The black haired gunman. "I'm used to it. Actually, I'm more used to people saying how cool they look."
"Well, I gotta admit, they do look pretty cool. So you wanna see the rest of the house?"
"No." was Blade's quick, almost frightened, answer. "I think I'd like to go back to the White House now."
"Okay. Me and Krauser will give you a tour around the place."
"Oh, goody." The gunman said rather sarcastically.
"Krauser, get off your lazy ass!"
The only response the brunette got from Krauser was snoring.
"Grrr..."
The three men entered the White House, one of them with a big lump on his head.
"I hate you, Leon." Krauser growled.
The younger agent smiled at him. "I know you do, but you never would've gotten that lump on your head if you never fell asleep in the first place."
A sudden bark caught the three men's attention.
There was Jaws, standing near them, growling with his head lowered and his ears flattened down menacingly. His never ending grin looked more dangerous than usual.
"What is that thing?" Blade asked.
"That's Jaws." The brunette answered. "He's a Colmillo. In other words, he's a wolf infected with this thing called the Las Plagas. He'll tear your arm off if he wants to."
"Hn." The black haired gunman smirked almost deviously before he pulled a gun from the holster on his thigh, hidden by his coat, and pointed it at the Colmillo. The two agents were amazed at the size of it. The gun had to at least be a foot in length. "And I'll kill him if I want to."
The infected wolf was unafraid of the weapon. In fact, he took a daring step forward towards Blade.
"Blade, don't shoot him!" Krauser cried. This outburst made the brunette stare at him in utter disbelief. "Uh...Cuz he's the President's pet and he loves Jaws. He'll fire you if you kill Jaws."
Leon's expression went back to normal as he nodded.
"I'd like to have a word with the President about that wolf." Blade said, more like a demand rather than a simple statement. He returned his gun to its holster, giving the wolf an ice cold glare as he did so. 'The President is insane. If he calls that thing a pet, then he is absolutely insane. I swear, if that thing bites me...'
"Follow me." The brunette lead the gunman out of the room.
"I'll catch up with you guys in a minute!" Krauser yelled.
Jaws whined a little bit as he trotted up to the agent and gave a small bark.
"Nice to see you, too, Jaws." The scar faced man knelt down and scratched the Colmillo behind the ears.
After the incident with the ghost, the two of them became friends, but would only act like it when no one was around.
"Jaws, I need you to do me a big favor."
Jaws stared at him, the look in his eyes saying, What is it?
"That guy who pointed the gun at you is a new agent and if he doesn't like it here, he'll leave and I won't get a bonus in my paycheck. That means you have to leave him alone, okay?"
The Colmillo whined loudly and lowered his head, obviously upset.
Krauser scratched the wolf behind the ears again. "I know it's not like you to leave strangers alone, but I really want that bonus. Besides, it's only for a week." The agent was suddenly hit by an idea. "Let's make a deal. If you leave Blade alone, I'll take you to the park and you can eat all the squirrels you want."
Jaws lifted his head up, his eyes shining with excitement, and barked loudly, licking the agent's face afterwards.
"Good boy. Now stop licking me!"
A week had gone by since Blade arrived and all hell broke loose. Wesker kept asking him to join the Sunglasses Club, Ashley kept hitting on him, Krauser kept praying to God that no one would think Blade was sexier than he was, Leon kept telling himself that he was better than Blade, and Jaws tried his hardest the stay out of Blade's way.
Even with all the chaos surrounding him, the gunman decided to stay. After all, it's not everyday you have the President sucking up to you just to get you to stay.
Right after the news got out that the gunman was staying, Krauser and Leon asked for their paychecks, along with their bonuses, to be handed to them in cash.
Afterwards, the older agent took Jaws to the park for his squirrel banquet. Not only did he eat many squirrels, but he also ate a cat, someone's cell phone, some lady's purse, some birds, and part of a telephone pole.
As the older agent carried Jaws into the White House because the infected wolf had a tummy ache which made it too painful for him to walk and he was too bloated, Blade began to wonder what the hell he got himself into.
Another chapter finished. For some reason, something doesn't feel right about this chapter, but maybe it's just me.