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EIGHTEEN, DAWG.

EIGHTEEN.

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TrInA iS jUsT lEiK tOtEs InViSbLe.

YeAh.

In every totes angst!one-shot, Tori is a bitch/stupid slut WHO IS JUST SO WAY MORE SPOILED AND TALENTED AND LEIK, OMG I HATEZ HURR, SHEEZE SUCH A N00B.

So one day, Trina's all leik: YEAH HI MY NAMES TRINA/MISS. AWESOME AS FUCK BUT I KNOW THAT'S ALL A LIE SO UHM YEAH, I'LL JUST GO DROWN IN MAH EMO TEARZ NOW.

And then Tori says smartly: UHM HEY TRINA LEIK WHASSUP?

And then there's just TONZ more TEENAGE!ANGST filled paragraphs, including sex, alcohol, and possibly drugs—BCUZ THAT SOLVES PROBLEMS. ~*EINSTIEN*~

Please refer to step 2 (in chapter one of this SUPER UBER COOLER THAN SCLICED BREAD (AKA TRINA) GUIDE) when writing this one-shot. Or any one-shot. Even if one got shot.

*that classic drum thingy—ba boom shh—or something*

OH HO HO MAH HUMOR ASTOUHNDZ MEH.

Please consider the person "Trina has sexual intercourse with"/FUCKEE as I like to call them. It can be anyone, really, even a total stranger or a girl—AS LONG AS THEY SOOTH HER OMG!PAIN.

Follow steps listed above and you'll write amazing Trina/Talentless Whore-Centrics THAT ARE ALMOST BUT LEIK 204832 MILES AWAY FROM BEING AS AWESOME AS MIEN.

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NAHTEEN.

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SONGFICS, BITCH.

PLEASE READ THIS FOLLOWING PIECE OF BEAUTIFUL INFO-MATION FROM MAH FRAN—AWESOME BITCH.

"Some have Tori as an annoying bitch who steals Beck away from Jade and she omg is so depeessed that she sings and Beck falls in love with her again and LEAVES TORI THE SLUT VEGA and it takes fifteen chapters for them to get back together. Tori shall threaten Jade "Stay away from Beck, you slut." and Jade shall bite her lower lip, suddenly afraid (omg wtf is that about? Jade afraid of Tori? IN YOUR DREAMS) of Tori and struggles to retaliate (another omg wtf moment. Jade struggling to insult Tori? Tori? Out of all people. Dear Gosh they MUST be watching another show called Victorious) before saying "YOU'RE THE SLUT, VEGA." Um, tell us something we don't know fanfiction writers. And then Tori shall gasp (overdramatic) and run crying to Beck, who shall then defend Jade and leave Tori for Jade.

"I don't wanna hurt Tori," Jade shall say, which brings me to OMG WTF? That would be the last thing Jade would say in a situation like this. Beck shall make a long, three-paragraphed speech about their OMG TRU LUV. Jade shall smile, kiss Beck passionately, COMPLETELY OKAY WITH HIM LEAVING HER FOR SLUT- I mean Tori - VEGA. And then Jade shall write a million love songs dedicated to Beck (OCC by far) and Tori shall die alone, because she's an OMG MEANIE!11! and Jade shall run off into the sunset with Beck, thanks to her song. Which is never written, just entiltled, probably because the author doesn't know how to write a song. Either that or Truth or Dare, or maybe Tori centrics, they always mention her obsesed with perfection and glitter and neglect. Trina centrics too, because she's an ATTENTION WHORE."

HOPE YOU PAID ATTENTION.

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….

...

JUST KIDDING I WOULD NEVER LEAVE YOU WITHOUT SOME OF MY ADVICE.

ANYWAYS.

TORI = SLUT

JADE = OMG SO SAD AND SENSITIVE-ERZ UN-DOR-NEATH

BECK = BASTARD

EVERYONE ELSE = USELESS.

THAT IS ALL.

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A/N: OH HELL-O THERE.

NEW CHAPTER FTW.

Yeah hi. Nothing much to say—

I LOVE YOU ALL.

—moving on.

WHOA MAN, TENTH CHAPTER/NINTEENTH STEP AND 86 REVIEWS SO FAR? DOODZ, AH LOVE YOU. LETS MAKE IT TO ONE-HUNDRED REVIEWS.

OR TRINA WILL CRY HER TOTES EMO-TEARS ALL OVER YOUR BIGGEST DREAMS.

JUST KIDDING.

Anyways, caps lock aside (dahmn!) I've got this schedule in mah brainz.

MONDAY = NEW CHAPTER OF THE GUIDE, CUZ SRSLY MONDAYS SUCK.

FRIDAY = NEW CHAPTER OF REVERSED BCUZ…. FRIDAYS ARE NICE.

And it's also nice and balanced, plus I have a lot of time to update both instead of it being all—OMG SO MUCH PRESSURE.

Hopefully I won't be gone for a month again, and you guys will hopefully be happier-erz too.

STEPS GO TO:

EIGHTTEEN: peaceluvvictorious

NAHTEEN: m u l t I s e d d i e

HAPPY LOVE DAY, I LOVE YOU ALL.