Disclaimer: I do not own the Twilight Saga.

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Chapter Ten: Screwed Over, Again

...

I'd never been in more pain.

I could feel my bones dislocating and twisting back into places that they shouldn't have been―tendons and muscle ripping apart and reforming together in taunt limbs. Nerves splitting and my skeleton was being pulled, stretching and hardening into something terrifying and completely alien. I screamed, but all I could hear was a high-pitched wailing from something monstrous that belonged to my nightmares.

The kitchen was chaotic, the table overturned and I lay panting on the tiles.

I shook my head, the coolness from the ground tingling my hands and feet as I gasped for air on all-fours, I looked up and wondered why anyone hadn't rushed to me, why I was alone and why I could see pictures in my head―of running in a forest, of confusion, trying to figure out the new presence in my mind that was also confused―

The trail's still fresh, what… wait, who are you?

Okay, I just heard a voice in my head. It spoke to me. Fuck, don't reply, don't reply, I chanted.

I heard Seth cry out in terror and saw him stumble back, away from me, pressed against a wall. Sue had an expression of pure panic. She held Emily close to her as both women stared with wide-eyes. My father clenched his chest and toppled over the upturned table and crashed to the ground, shattering more plates upon impact. I cried out his name, but I only heard a whimper. I tried to reach for him but saw in replace for my hands two giant clawed paws.

Stiffening, I couldn't think of why I had paws responding to my movement and not fingers. Sue and Emily ran to Harry and were shouting, at him and at each other and at me, though I could hear both everything and nothing of what they were saying, only the blood pounding in my ears and Seth's terrified breathing and the voice in my head demanding my name. I closed my eyes and thought human.

Human, human, human.

I'm a mother-fucking human.

I heard an ear-splitting crack of re-breaking bones, a gasp and weeping before I realised it was me, kneeling naked in the kitchen and wheezing breath in and out of my lungs like it wasn't a regular habit and I had to work to keep them functioning.

I snatched the food-lathered tablecloth wrapped it around myself, heart thudding in my chest, body numb.

Sue was sobbing and Emily appeared utterly lost, holding my father's hand tightly as he groaned and rasped air past his teeth. I stared at the scene dazedly, the smell of blood was thick and I couldn't return Seth's gaze as he too watched entranced by all the happenings.

He too couldn't find the strength to move.

"Hospital," I choked out, my voice hoarse and bloodily raw. "Call… call the hospital,"

Emily looked at me frantically, nodding and lunging for the phone by the sink.

She was pale, and I retched. What the fuck am I?

I just turned into something just now―a beast, an animal. Something like them.

What the fuck should I do?

"Dad?" I had no control, my voice shook like a frightened child. "Daddy?"

Sue glanced up, tears silently streaming and relieved at the sight of me.

"Go put some clothes on," she told me.

It was amazing how strong my mother's voice was―so calm, something I needed to hear at that moment. I needed someone to hold my hand and tell me everything was okay. I needed Harry. Harry, who was struggling to breathe. I needed my father to hold me and stroke my hair and murmur comforting words. I needed that one moment, otherwise I'd never be able to pick myself off the floor.

"Dad?" I whispered again.

"Go, Leah," Sue barked.

"The ambulance is on its way," Emily said quietly.

I managed my way to my room, everything except my father seemed utterly insignificant, and I ran back before a few moments had passed. I was quiet and thought better to blend in with the wallpaper; it wasn't long before my head perked and I could hear the distant ambulance sirens, though no one else in the room seemed to notice it until minutes later when it pulled up in front of the house.

I could smell the burnt rubber from the tires, the hospital-stench that clung to the paramedics…

Emily elected to stay behind to pass the news on to those who needed to know as Sue jumped into the back of the ambulance once they finished strapping my father to a gurney and hooking tubes into him. She left me with the brief order of taking her car and driving Seth and myself to the hospital behind them because the ambulance would only allow one person to ride with them and neither Seth nor myself denied our mother that right.

Before I could register my thoughts I had the keys in my hand and was turning it in the ignition, Seth buckled in at my side and the car roaring to life I sped off after the siren-blaring vehicle.

Seth didn't speak, wouldn't look at me, though I was very aware of his irregular breathing habits.

I didn't want to scare him more than he already was, so I didn't look back at him and speak and drive and do a million other things at once because of the adrenaline in my veins made me feel incredibly invincible and the steering wheel suddenly felt very fragile in my hands.

The hands of a monster.

We bolted out of the car the moment I pulled up on the emergency entrance of Forks Community Hospital. I'd seen this place too many times this past year, and I remembered all too clearly the last occasion when I had run from these doors that I was now running back into, how I ran and never wanted to return here. Yet here I was, and the running never mattered because a greater force was pushing me forward, towards my father.

Nurses were hooking more tubes and wires into Harry's skin. I could smell something foul and sickeningly sweet faded into the air, mixed with the hospital-stench of sterile metals and plastic. I crinkled my nose against it and tried not to let it bother me, though it made the back of my throat ache.

The consistent beeping of the machines fastened to my father was a source of dread and relief. When the doctor arrived Seth and I were sent to the waiting room, where I caught a glimpse of Charlie Swan wheeling Billy Black through the corridors to my father's room. I didn't call out to them, afraid that I looked as creature-like as I felt and that they―Billy in particular―would be able to tell what I really was.

All I could do was think of moments I'd had with my father, moments I'd hadn't had a chance to have yet and hoped that I would have a chance to have in the future. I managed to hunt down one of the young trainee nurses tending him to question her. She stuttered and wouldn't give me a straight answer as to his condition until I eventually made her cry and almost got myself kicked out of the ward by one of the older residents.

The day had moved by as a haze of check-ups, worried expressions and medical-term words that I had no hope of understanding though Sue always interceded sharply with a 'and that means what exactly?' followed by a stern glare whenever someone started babbling nine-syllable phrases.

I was half-lying on the bed, holding Harry's hand between both of mine and Sue did the same with his other, her back stiff against the awkward hospital chairs yet her eyes were soft as she regarded her husband as alertly as she had when we first arrived.

I couldn't recall a moment in my life when I had felt more frightened. I suppose that is what you'd expect when you suddenly turn into something non-human, but I had barely given it a thought. My father, the man who raised me, needed a machine to breathe for him. And that was scarier than anything I could have imagined, anything that would happen to me didn't matter. I didn't give a shit about me.

"He'll be fine," my mother whispered. "He'll be laughing about this tomorrow."

I could only nod in response.

Before I could comprehend why, I tensed. The nerves covering every inch of my skin stood on end. I sensed something different in the air, a sudden change in sound and taste, and it wasn't seconds later my strange new instincts were confirmed by an alarm sounded from the devices strapped to Harry.

A long emptiness rang clear; no heartbeat. Dead.

Dead.

Dead.

A strangled cry broke my lips and I muffled it with my hand. No one else had reacted yet. I alone could hear his heart no longer hammering. I alone heard the last struggles of its beats and smelt the death clouding the room and saw with razor-accuracy the stillness of his form.

Here lies Harry Clearwater; dead.

Nurses flooded in, adjusting dials and ordering us away, performing CPR and pounding at his chest as if to beat the life back into him.

I dropped to the ground and sobbed before anyone else knew why.

Deeper, deeper… down, down…

He's gone.

Gone.

...

They let us stay in the room to say goodbye.

Charlie and Billy put on brave faces and waited outside; dealing with some paperwork the staff had shoved under our noses before my father's corpse was cold. Seth cried all but silently, his fingers wound through Harry's stiff ones. Sue buried her face in the bed sheets at his chest and gave no sign of life other than the unsteady shaking of her shoulders. And I stood there, fixated on the lifeless form that had taught me to walk and talk and fish for a good catch. My eyes were cruelly dry.

I had screamed and sobbed but not one tear fell, only my mouth slightly parted.

Was I in shock? Hadn't the reality of this moment hit me yet? There was something else hidden under all the sadness and pain and regret and anger. I don't feel the way I should feel―my father is gone forever. Why do I feel this fathomless guilt? The weight on my back was crushing, and I felt blame where there should be grief.

Why?

Because it's your fault, a malicious voice I recognised as my own answered. You killed him.

I froze. No, no, no. Not me, it couldn't be me.

Stupid, fucked-up thoughts.

I let out a breath. Oh God, were they right?

I turned to escape and opened the door, colliding with something hard. I pressed my hands against it to push myself away, realising too late that it was a well-formed chest, and not just any well-formed chest, but the well-formed chest of Sam fucking Uley.

It took all I had not to fling myself in his arms and cry my eyes out, so instead I glared.

Sam didn't seem to notice though, because he's the one who pulled me into his embrace and ran his fingers in my hair as my head rested on his shoulder, by his pecks, with the beating of his heart in my ear. I didn't move, didn't shove him away like I should have, I didn't object to the murmured condolences and tight squeezes he showered upon me as if I was the only one who mattered in the world. Sam held me close, and I let him.

"I'm so sorry, Leah," he mumbled, lips pressed to the top of my head. "I'm so, so sorry."

"It's my fault," I said, a hoarse whisper. "I killed him. I killed my father."

What kind of sick monster am I? I killed him. I transformed into this horrible, sickening thing that killed him. It was my fault. My burden, knowing that one look at me sent my father to his grave.

"No, baby," Sam took my shoulders and forced me to meet his gaze. "None of this is your fault, Lee-Lee―"

The old nicknames made me recoil. "Let go, Sam," I pried at his grip, squirming. "Let go!"

He dropped his loosened grasp with a startled look. Frowning curiously, he hesitated before leaning forward and breathing in a deep whiff of my hair. He pulled back again, looking almost as puzzled as I did agitated. "Leah, you smell different," he began. "What―"

"My cousin!" I snapped, shaking. "You're engaged to my cousin but want to talk about my shampoo?"

Sam flinched.

"Please Lee, if I knew she was going to―"

"My father's dead, Sam! Dead! I don't give a shit if Emily is going to be your little virgin sacrifice or you don't like the smell of my new hair products or whatever―"

"Leah―"

He was interrupted when we heard an impatient clearing of a throat. "Samuel, could you take Leah and Seth home?" Sue stood at the doorway to Harry's room. Seth standing rigidly nearby. Her face a cold mask and arms wrapped around herself to hold the jacket I recognised as Charlie's police coat to her body. "There are still a few things I need to do here so I'll need to keep the car."

"Of course," Sam said earnestly. "I'm sorry for your loss, Sue. Harry was a great man."

She muttered an inaudible "I know" and disappeared back through the door.

I narrowed my eyes at him. "I'd rather walk," I spat.

"Don't be stubborn, Leah," Sam sighed. "I'll drive you, its no big deal."

My lips were open, ready to argue, when Seth softly spoke for the first time all day.

"Stay with me, Leah. I need you. Please."

He sounded utterly destroyed. Lost and broken. I couldn't deny Seth anything. It was a weakness I never liked to admit. And hearing him speak and him wanting me to be with him after he saw me turn into something gruesome was exactly what I needed. I nodded at my brother, and made my march towards the exit, passed the main ward where Charlie and Billy were talking to a doctor.

Charlie looked up at our approach, his brow heavily creased.

"I'll go check on Sue," he said before stalking off.

I knew it was so we wouldn't see the tears staining his face. The doctor left with a clipboard Billy had handed to him, and the older man wheeled himself over to us, the misery weighing down his usually strong figure.

"I'll go with you," Billy said gruffly, addressing Sam. "I need to check on Jake,"

"He's with Bella," Sam answered, disapproval lathered in his tone. "She went swimming."

Swimming? What a bimbo.

Billy raised his brows. "In this… weather?"

Sam shrugged indifferently. "The storm passed earlier this afternoon."

Now I knew for sure that they were talking bullshit, because I could hear clearly the pounding rain and howling wind from inside the building, the thunder still crackling in the distance. I pursed my lips and reached for Seth, to guide him outside to the car, when he shrunk away from my hand, I flinched away as if he'd slapped me.

Seth was afraid of me.

He recoiled from my touch. My own brother.

I tried to appear as if it didn't bother me as I climbed into the front of Sam's car and left the boys to help Billy out of his chair and into the back, while I tried not to recollect the number of times Sam and I had sex in this same scrap of metal, in the same backseat where my little brother and an elder now sat. I noticed the faded nail imprints from where I'd griped the worn leather and the indent on the roof where Sam hit his head one time afterwards.

Sam slid across to the driver's side, his jaw tightly locked as he stared straight ahead through the windscreen.

I wondered if he was having the same past thoughts I was.

We drove in silence, none attempted to make small talk, and as soon as we pulled up to the house I jumped out of my seat without a word and started fumbling my pockets for my keys, standing impatiently on the porch I heard Seth's door slam and Sam's engine roar back to life and take off up the road to the Blacks street.

I wedged the key into the door, anticipating a shower and a sleep, except I heard the distinct sound of splintering of wood.

Seth's fist had struck the porch railing, sending a long crack through the timber. His teeth were straining and his forearms shaking. "Why didn't you thank him?" Seth growled at me, his kind features twisted until I couldn't recognise my own flesh and blood beneath the rage. "It was rude! He didn't have to take us home, it was the least you could have done!"

It seemed like a stupid thing to be angry about, but his blame irritated me, and I bit back with just as much vigour.

"Do I look like I care if I'm rude to the fucker or not?" I asked furiously.

I could feel myself quivering. My blood felt hot, my vision sharpened, and I calculated Seth's hostile stance and matched it with one of my own, our fury clashed at eye level. I hadn't noticed. He was almost taller than me. "Dad wouldn't like it!" he spat. "Dad could never stand it if someone was rude!"

My lip curled upwards. "Well Dad isn't here now, is he?"

Seth snarled. "Shut up, Leah!"

"Make me!" I hissed.

"Tell me what the hell's going on!" he demanded.

I'd never fought with Seth, beside from the common argument of who is doing the dishes, and now I had a strong urge to leap forward and rip out his throat, tear into his flesh with my teeth that had a thirst for blood that had to be quenched―

I shoved at his chest, pushing him from my path. "Move!" I ordered, hauling my shivering body down the porch proved harder than I anticipated. I fell under the pressure and squirmed against the grass that smelt like rain and earth, I managed to distance myself from Seth before I felt the burn of my skin splitting, the agony of my reforming shape that so easily burst forth.

It was less painful this time, as if my body had adjusted after the first encounter. The voices came almost immediately, like a wave of foreign thoughts brushing dangerously close to my soul, I shrouded from the intimate touch.

I was in the forest again. No, they were in the forest; I was still sprawled on my lawn. Two of them this time, two voices speaking as distinctly as if they were right by my ear, though they were nothing but a buzzing distraction to me. I was set out for blood. The pain had not smothered my fury, and I settled my eyes on Seth who took one step forward and exploded, shreds of fabric flying everywhere. I snarled and lunged for him.

My attack ceased as a pain knocked me to my knees. The torment combined with mine was almost unbearable, and I watched as a sandy-brown wolf withered and whimpered. I could hear its screams in my head as if it were my own. The anger was replaced.

I touched the thrashing form with the tip of my nose. Seth? I whispered.

His ears perked, I knew he had heard me.

It's Seth Clearwater.

Fuck, little Seth Clearwater? The voices acknowledged.

Oh shit, what should I do?

Run into the forest, I heard one of them say. We'll meet you there and we can explain.

I didn't argue with the voice, I nudged Seth to his feet and watched him wobble as he altered to the new limbs. I felt a rush of relief from him as he realised the ache had subsided to nothing more than a dull throbbing. And mine… actually felt pretty good. As if I'd been reclined all my life inside a small box until just now.

The sandy wolf that was Seth whined. Oh man, what the hell's happening? What's going on?

He pushed all his confusion outwards, it weighed down as if it was my own burden and the burden of the two others present in my head, and I tried to shove everything inside so they couldn't hear me, wouldn't notice me. I wanted to disappear.

I've gone crazy, Seth settled, and a picture of him in a straightjacket came to mind.

You're not crazy, Seth. The first voice said soothingly.

Don't run, the other warned. We're almost there.

And they were. I could see the flashes of greenery as they flew by them, smell the crushed leaves and a sickeningly familiar scent that was not what they smelt now―a memory of a smell. They were looking for something. Something stronger and less diluted than the one I'd come across in the hospital…

Hospital? I winced as one of them picked up my thoughts as if I'd intended for them to hear it. You smelt a leech in the hospital? I didn't intend to answer, but my memory of the scent sprung to mind and confirmed the question. The voice growled. What the fuck was she doing there? Shit! We're going to have to extend the perimeter again―

Listen, will you? The other hissed. The scent was weak. It was from the doctor bloodsucker, not her.

Their arguing stopped and I cocked my head towards the rustling in the nearby shrubbery. I'd managed to walk Seth and myself a good distance into the forest. It was dark from the storm yet I managed to see with perfect accuracy through my eyes and the eyes of the two enormous wolves that stood before us. Through them I could clearly see the lanky desert-sand wolf―Seth―drop his tail between his legs as he let out a low whimper, his front paws digging into the ground as he contemplated bolting back through the trees.

I could also observe a smaller, light grey wolf that stood rigidly with its upper lip curled up to show its teeth, ears pressed back flat against its skull, fur bristling. It was the smallest of the wolves they had come across, so they figured it must be young boy, its frame so delicate and slim.

It took me a long-ass minute to realise that the pale grey wolf was me.

The bigger of the wolves had pure white fur, tarnished only by the coffee-coloured stripes that covered his back and face like a mask. He stepped forward and his eyes burned into me; studying, confused, eager to be introduced. The other was a dark shade of grey, and mirrored my aggressive pose by raising his hackles; he was not pleased by my threatening greeting.

You may know us, the white-wolf said, plainly ignoring his companion. My name is Jared, and this idiot is Paul. He swung his head around to gesture to the darker grey wolf who was sneering at me. They approached us and continued to analyse our appearance.

Seth's confusion only increased by the introduction. What…I don't…

What are you waiting for? Paul barked. Say your names.

Seth, he replied quickly.

Asshole, I thought bitterly.

Paul leered at me. You're a bit small to be mouthing-off, you little―

Leah, Seth answered for me. That's Leah.

What? Paul scoffed. As in your sister, female sister Leah?

No, I snapped back. As in his male sister Leah, moron.

The bigger wolf growled in warning but was silenced by a softer voice. Leah… Jared's thoughts were quiet, but then I was seeing something different, through someone else's eyes, staring in through my bedroom window. I suddenly somehow knew that Sam had ordered them to find Leah, keep Leah safe, and then bring Leah to him. Bring Leah to him. The person didn't like that order, he didn't think it was right as he watched low to the ground in envy as Sam carried her unconscious form in his arms and laid her gently onto her bed.

Let it go, brother… Jared's calming tone had broken through, sensing his resentment.

Sam was watching her―me―with such tender awareness before he knelt down and brushed his lips to my forehead, lingering longer than he should of according to the person keeping guard. Sam stared at me for another long moment then strode across and jumped out the window, towards the person that was watching him with spite.

"Embry," Sam addressed him, his voice strangely struggled and face masked with pain. "You can go home now."

A shift that was as easy as breathing and Embry was gone, his presence no longer in Jared's head―

I… I thought it was you… I whispered. I didn't know what to think of the memory. It hadn't been Jared or Paul or Embry that tucked me safely into bed all the times I couldn't figure out how I'd done it. It was Sam. His instructions had them report to him with an out-cold me, and he'd send them off once I was in his arms, and he'd tuck me under warm covers and kiss my forehead tenderly before retreating back out my window.

Impossible, Jared thought numbly. Girls can't… Leah can't be… he shook his head. We gotta call Sam.

Sam, Sam, Sam. Sam…

I couldn't help it, my memories awakened. Sam. My Sam. I pictured him holding my hand, caressing my face. Our bodies fused together the first time we had sex, tears springing to my eyes from the pain, him apologising at the horror of hurting me, and me telling him to "shut up and quit ruining the moment" as he laughed and kissed my tears away. Sweet, gentle kisses―

Urgh, Leah, stop, stop! Seth cried, attempting to block the images. He was horrified and nauseous.

Sorry, I said quickly. I'm sorry, I didn't mean to―

Urgh, what the hell is wrong with me?

Paul was quick to show his disgust while Jared tried not to feel too uncomfortable, probably because I was feeling embarrassed enough for all four of us. I closed my eyes and tried to force the memories to stop, but they wouldn't. Sam carrying me in his arms down the beach. Sam smiling and tucking my hair behind my ear, reminding me how beautiful it is and how much he loves it. Sam getting down on one knee, asking me to be his wife―fuck, brain, shut up!

Um, okay… awkward. Jared interrupted.

Paul rolled his eyes at me. Jeez, get over it already, will you? We have more important stuff to worry about. There's a fucking female werewolf and some psycho-bitch redheaded bloodsucker running around the place. You haven't seen her by any chance have you?

Seth let out an uneasy laugh. Werewolf? Redheaded what? It sounded funny to him, but he didn't seem to know whether it was okay to ask questions, though he was risking it with the hope that it would change the topic and get the pictures of Sam and me out of his mind. He still didn't feel comfortable not knowing what was happening, not knowing what he was. What's a redheaded bloodsucker?

Oh, you know… Jared made it sound like it was obvious. Bloodsucker, parasite, leech, Cold One―

Cold One? Seth's amusement disappeared.

He knew the stories well, as did we all.

You mean, like… a vampire?

Seth's eyes widened as the confirmation passed through the link between us.

So, you're looking for a redheaded vampire? Then what are we, the protectors of the tribe like in the old legends? How do we find it―the redhead thing? Are they all redheaded? Do we have any cool powers? Is that what you guys are―Sam Uley's gang, you run around as wolves and find redheaded vampires―

My brother's cynical yet eager swarm of questions came in a never-ending flow that made my head throb since he didn't need to pause for a breath through the connection to our brains. They all look different, but the one in the area that has been testing our border is a redhead, she's been trying to find a way in, Jared answered him. I wanted to roll my eyes at Seth and ask him if turning into a werewolf wasn't "cool powers" enough for him―

Leah, Seth sighed. Of course, he'd heard my thoughts. Fuck. Aren't you even a little curious?

Not in the slightest, I said flatly.

Oh… he picked up a memory from one of the others, Seth slowly turned to look at me. It was amazing how he could take the form of a ferocious animal and still manage a puppy-dog expression. You already knew about all this, Lee… you knew about Sam and the others, but you didn't…

He was hurt that I hadn't told him. It wasn't my secret to tell… at the time, I thought bitterly.

With a swift motion Jared threw his head back and howled into the crisp forest air, his cry was seconded by Paul and their voices echoed with ear-splitting fierceness. I felt Seth have the urge to join them, so I threw him a don't-even-think-about-it glare and he huffed in defeat.

What's with the noise? I asked Jared once they were quiet.

He walked closer to us now, since there was no longer the possibility of scaring us away.

We've called the others. You have to understand Leah, this is more than a little strange. Its not that a girl becoming a protector is unusual… it just isn't, you know? There has never been a female werewolf, ever. Something must be seriously wrong with you. Jared flinched, he didn't mean to state the last fact, but it was forced out by the blunt, honest-brutality of his thoughts. Nothing was censored, nothing you could keep to yourself.

So, I'm some sort of freak among freaks.

Great.

I wasn't as upset about this as I should be, my mind had gone blank. There has never been another female werewolf. I'm the only one. Harry had known this. If it had been Seth to transform at the breakfast table―not me―then maybe, maybe he never would have… maybe it wouldn't have happened, it wouldn't have been such a bombshell to him―

Seth whined. Lee, no, please don't―

I couldn't stop it. I replayed it in my mind, through my eyes Seth, Jared and Paul witnessed my father's horror-struck expression as he looked at me, the shock and pain that filled his eyes, his last breaths in the hospital, how I could smell the death reeking off him, hear his heart's final beats…

Leah, Seth cowered under the images. Please Lee, please…

I could feel the dull disbelief coming from Jared and Paul. Harry's dead? Paul said to himself. Man…

Jared sent out his sympathy through the bond, and Seth thanked him. My ears perked and I sensed a change in the still night air. It was a difficult feeling to explain, almost like the atmosphere itself shimmered, like a ripple in water that made me shiver as it passed through me.

It means someone's about to phase, Jared explained. It's probably Sam.

As he finished speaking another presence made itself known in my head.

Guys, we got a problem, the new voice spoke.

Paul dug his claws into the ground impatiently. No, Jake, we've got the problem. You were just too busy babysitting your leech-loving girlfriend.

Huh, Jacob Black.

The tension between Paul and Jacob was borderline-hostile. Though it came as no surprise to Jared, we could all plainly see that the two had less-than-friendly feelings for the other. They were forced to cooperate, but neither was happy about it. Jacob was in the woods by his house, running to meet up with the group. He tightened his teeth together. Really? Jacob said sourly. Then since you're so smart Paul, you must have already used your awesome psychic abilities to know that the Cullens are back in town and were lying in wait inside Bella's house. You did a great job patrolling since they slipped through right under your ugly nose―

Psychic abilities? Do we have that? Seth asked sceptically.

Seth? Jacob sounded surprised. Hey, sorry about your dad. Welcome to the ranks, kid.

Welcome to our problem, Paul added dryly.

Jacob rolled his eyes. Seth Clearwater is your problem? You've got to be kidding me―

Actually, I drawled. The problem would be me.

Who… oh, holy shit! Jacob staggered mid-run and almost ran into a tree. Leah? Fuck! What the hell, guys?

My thoughts exactly, Jared wirily stated.

Jacob's thoughts were temporarily stuttering so he pushed himself to run faster until a large figure burst through the undergrowth and skidded to a stop a few feet away. Compared to Seth and myself, Jacob was a gigantic beast with russet coloured fur with his tongue lolling out of his muzzle as he panted for breath. He stared at me, unsure of how to react to the impossible standing right there before him, defying everything that they know about themselves and the wolves within, making them all doubt and share anxious expressions.

You've called Sam? Jacob asked, though it didn't sound like a question.

I grimaced, or as close to one as a wolf could get.

Yeah, Jared confirmed with a nod. He must be held back by something.

Last I heard he was on his way back to the hospital from my place, Jacob said. To keep Sue company since Charlie had to go home to Bella and the leeches. I don't know how many of them have come back, I called to make sure she hadn't been eaten, he added darkly. I called the hospital too, to tell Sam, but Sue said he'd come and gone.

Through Jacob's memories I could hear my mother's crackled, broken voice over the phone.

Seth cringed and I fought to keep my face neutral.

Did she say where he was going? Paul enquired.

No, only that he seemed like he was in a hurry to get there.

The air simmered, I felt myself freeze and the others waited patiently. What the hell happened? A new, strong voice demanded.

I recognised it immediately even when I hadn't recognised the others at first. I recognised his voice. Sam. Though the sternness of his tone didn't show it, he was frantic and his memories were muddled. He directed his question to Jared. It became clear then that he was second-in-command.

Leah, Sam hissed my name, and a memory came and gone before I could understand it. Did you find her? Did you find them? Why didn't you stop it? What the fuck happened? He was angry and his first question hadn't been about what they themselves had discovered as the wolves had originally thought. They weren't quite sure what he was thinking in his anxious state, except that it had to do with me being in danger, and they all knew I was as fine as I could possibly be at that moment, standing right beside them as a fellow wolf.

No one was sure how to answer.

So I spoke.

Sam… I had no hope. I called out to him, and he was close, so close that I could hear him running.

Through the other wolves I heard how my voice sounded―miserable and yearning. The kind of voice someone uses when in mortifying pain, the kind of tone they'd say it in with their last agonizing breaths of life. Confusion filtered through Sam, and it seemed the number of presences in his head became known to him.

Who…? He trailed off, and I saw flashes of his recent memories, he left the hospital and sped down streets, the desperate urge to check on me, to make sure I was okay. It was unavoidable. We witnessed him running out of his car back to my house and finding Seth's ruined clothes alongside of my shredded ones. He feared the worst and blamed himself for not being there to protect me, because it was obvious to him what had happened:

Seth Clearwater had transformed and attacked me.

My brother was openly mortified. I didn't attack Leah! He exclaimed. I would never do that!

I almost laughed at the fact of how close we had actually come.

But instead I felt grim.

I'm right here, Sam. I said bleakly.

There was dead silence. I didn't want to believe it. I didn't want to believe that Sam was there, in my mind. I didn't want to believe that any of these boys held access to my innermost thoughts and memories. It made me vulnerable, it made me weak.

It was like I'd already lived this moment. Another figure as large as Jacob emerged through the trees. As I expected, the black coat and eyes were already etched into my memory, I remembered the same overgrown wolf I'd already established as Sam from the day Emily received her scars. If anything, he was bigger now, and pinned me to the ground with his glare.

The atmosphere was thick and I caught my breath.

You're not Leah, Sam finally broke the silence, stern and definite.

I shrunk under the weight of his accusation, ashamed of my weakness.

Yes I am, I hissed.

I know who I am. Leah Clearwater. Fuck, he thinks I'm so stupid I didn't even know myself?

The black wolf bared his teeth. No, you're not.

I felt the sudden worry of the others. Jared took a step forward. Sam―

No! Sam snarled and Jared fell silent. Enough! You're not Leah. You can't be. It's not possible.

He paced the small clearing in which we were all gathered, frustrated and focused on denial. Jacob and Jared followed his every move with their eyes, their wolf forms incredibly still. Paul lost interest and laid on the forest floor. Seth padded over to me cautiously. Regardless of his better judgement, Sam could think of no one other than Seth that had shown any signs of becoming one of them.

Then I was suddenly watching myself through his eyes, he saw me in the hospital with pain and heartache twisting my features and a lost part of him opened his arms and knew it felt so right to have me wrapped in them. It was so gut-wrenchingly familiar to him; how perfectly I fit in his embrace.

But as he breathed in my scent it was a warped version of what he had thought he remembered so flawlessly.

He knew well that an effect on the body's natural smell meant drastic change to the body itself. It scared him then, and now he had the doubt of my altered scent and body that pointed towards the small grey wolf that stood before him.

Still he refused to allow himself to think of the wolf as me, because he wanted nothing more that to not have me in his thoughts. The legends mentioned nothing about female werewolves; therefore, it was impossible. The growing unease of the other wolves did nothing to bring Sam back to his senses, his escaped thoughts of me bombarding every corner of his mind―how he would watch me run every morning along First Beach, how he loved the way my long hair felt slipping through his fingers.

It was all impossible to him, and yet there I was, defying all reason by my very presence.

Lee-Lee… Sam stopped pacing and cocked his head to the side. Oh God, no…

And then something became clear to me.

Sam Uley still loved me.

I was determined to get this posted tonight! Well, it's now very early morning here but close enough! Finally, we've gotten passed Leah's transformation. I feel like doing a happy-dance. Anyway, please feel free to tell me your thoughts, ideas, suggestions. I'm more than happy to hear from you. Oh, and I just finished the Vampire Academy novels, how awesome are they?

Please read and review!

Hazel-Buttafly