Cassian was tired. In fact he didn't think the word tired really covered what he was. He was so far beyond tired he might actually be the walking dead. He finished his report to Draven and waited desperately to be dismissed.
He'd been on a mission for two months helping a rebel cell recruit and organize on some shitty swamp planet that he never ever wanted to return to and all he wanted to do was collapse in an actual bed. Yes, it was so bad that the standard Alliance beds were sounding like luxury. He was bug bitten and covered in a layer of grime he didn't believe would actually ever come off. Kay had gone directly to an oil bath that he'd complained would never truly fix the damage that had been done by the planet's inhospitable terrain. Cassian had never been so glad to see the frozen hell that is Hoth. At least there weren't snakes slithering into your boots overnight here or insects trying to make nests inside your ears. If the swamp planet wasn't the main source of ingredients essential to bacta he'd have been happy to let the Empire keep its hold on it.
"Thank you, Captain Andor. You're dismissed."
Cassian didn't need to be told twice. He navigated the hallways in a daze and nodded wearily to acquaintances as he passed, completely focused on getting to his own quarters. He keyed the code and stumbled into the room switching on a light. He nearly jumped out of his skin as a meowing noise greeted him from his bed.
"How did you get in here?" he asked the loth-cat, which just blinked at him slowly and then curled back down in his blankets. It must have come in through the vents or something. Oh well, as long as the thing could share a bed he was too tired to care right now.
Cassian moved forward only to almost face plant into the floor when he tripped over a discarded boot. "What the kriff?" He cut himself off as he glanced around the room and realized it must have been looted while he was gone. He never left his quarters this messy. He blamed his tiredness for the fact that he didn't instantly register it wasn't his stuff littering the room. He twisted around just to make sure he was in the right quarters, but that was definitely his parka hanging by the door where he'd left it and his cold weather gear neatly tucked into the shelf where it should be.
The door slid open behind him and he turned to ask, what he presumed would be Kay, what the hell was going on.
Jyn let out a foul curse and looked sheepish standing in his door. Her cheeks were flushed and she was panting, still dressed in gear that meant she'd clearly just been doing perimeter checks. "I'm sorry! I just heard you were back and I was hoping I could get here before your debrief was done." She scooted in past him and frantically started collecting discarded clothing and sheets of flimsy scattered on his desk. Rogue lifted his head again to watch the chaos, but otherwise didn't move.
"Jyn?"
"Yeah?"
"Why is all your stuff in my room?"
"Sorry! I'm really sorry!" She looked up at him and then looked horrified, lunging past him to grab a bra that was dangling off his desk chair.
"Not really an answer to my question."
Jyn's cheeks flushed a deeper red and she shoved the clothing into an empty duffle bag that had been shoved halfway under his bed. "The power went down in F block so I couldn't stay in my quarters. Everyone was doubling up with friends, and I didn't really have anywhere to go since you and Bodhi were on missions, Han's quarters are in F block too, and I was tired of sleeping on the Falcon. You weren't here so I figured you wouldn't mind. I should have gone to Bodhi's, but I figured he'd be back on base sooner than you, and his quarters are smaller, and I'm really sorry."
Cassian's brain parsed that jumbled admission slowly and he sighed. "How'd you even get in?"
She looked, if anything, even more embarrassed. "I'm an ok slicer and the door security systems are old. It wasn't that hard to get your code."
"Is the power back on? You can't go back if it isn't," he said wearily. He'd really been looking forward to passing out, but no one could stay long in the unheated areas, and he wasn't kicking Jyn out if she had nowhere to go. Generally he'd be more than happy to let her stay, but he wasn't fully functioning right now and he didn't have the energy to play host.
Jyn continued to shove items in the bag. "Yeah, it's fine. I should have gone ages ago, it's just you have a shower and you weren't here and it seemed like a waste."
"Jyn, how long have you been living here?" She dropped her head and mumbled. "What?"
"Maybe like a month," she said more clearly. "I'm really really sorry. I figured when you came back I'd hear about it and could clear out fast enough, I even bribed a flight controller to give me the heads up when your ship made contact, but I was on a stupid patrol."
He tugged the bag out of her hand gently to stop her frenzied movements and crouched next to her. "Jyn, it's fine. I'm not angry. Just surprised."
"It was rude of me."
"Well, yeah, but it would have been rude of me to not offer you shelter had I been here when the power went out so I guess we're equal." It was flawed logic, but she looked so scattered he couldn't help but allay her concerns.
"If you just give me another minute or two," she said glancing up at him through her lashes. "I can be totally cleared out."
"Jyn, it's fine. I was just surprised. Is the power actually fixed?"
"Yeah, mostly," she said with a little smile. "It goes in and out sometimes, but mostly everyone's moved back. They gave everyone an extra blanket."
"Problem solved," he said sarcastically. Another blanket wasn't doing shit if the power went out all night. "Go make sure your quarters are actually livable." He stood up and stretched. "I'm going to pass out, but if there's no heating just come back and you can stay." It wasn't like they hadn't shared a bed before. He yawned and stood letting her stuff the last of her scattered belongings back in the duffle bag. She slung the bag over her shoulder and slipped past him to gather the now protesting loth-cat into her arms.
Cassian raised an eyebrow. "They let you keep him?" Last he'd been on base she'd still been smuggling the loth-cat back and forth from the Falcon to her room.
"It's not like I was going to let them say no," Jyn said with a sharp grin as she wrangled the animal into a more comfortable position in her arms. "Besides those little rat creatures really were Hoth natives. Rogue's been killing them left and right and engineering has been having way less problems with frayed, bitten-through wires. They should be thanking me."
Cassian snorted. He doubted she'd ever get that. "I'll see you for dinner with everyone?"
"Yeah, sure. Just com me when you're up." She started for the door and then paused as he dropped his own bag on the table and headed for the bed. "Cassian?"
"Yeah?"
"You might want to take a shower first. You smell worse than a tauntaun. Just a suggestion!" That said she slipped out the door.
He eyed the bed and debated the benefits of a shower over immediate sleep. Realizing he was probably going to burn his current clothes and didn't have the option of burning his bed he groaned and made his way to the 'fresher. He dully noted Jyn had forgotten a toothbrush, hairbrush and hair ties on the small sink. Oh well, she'd have to get them after dinner. He stepped into the shower and did his best to scrub off the worst of the grime. His beard had gotten out of control and it seemed like a losing fight to bother with it. Easier to just get rid of the damn thing and start again. He finished as quickly as he could in the 'fresher and stumbled out to his bed, falling asleep almost the instant his head touched the pillow.
Cassian navigated the base hallways feeling infinitely better. A four hour nap had made life manageable again and he'd only wanted to kill his chrono a little when the alarm went off to get him up for dinner. He'd get some food in himself and then planned to immediately go back to bed. He'd commed Jyn to meet him at the mess and spotted her already sitting at a table by herself with a tray of food when he entered. Getting in line and grabbing his own pile of food he walked over and dropped into the seat across from her.
She barely glanced up from her datapad. "That seat is taken."
"By who?" he asked curiously. Maybe Bodhi was back on base?
Jyn jerked her head up and stared at him wide eyed. "Cassian?"
It was such a strange reaction he glanced around behind him to see if there was an explanation for it. "Uh, yeah?"
"What did you do?" She reached across the table and touched his jaw tentatively before thinking better of it and snatching her hand back.
"Are you serious? I just shaved." Jyn kept staring and he fidgeted in his seat. "What?"
"You look like you're fifteen." And then she promptly burst into laughter. "I didn't even recognize you," she wheezed out between laughs.
Cassian ducked his head as people turned to stare at the commotion she was causing. "I don't look that different."
"Yes, yes you do," she argued still sputtering. "You look like a baby."
"I do not."
"A little fresh faced baby," Jyn chortled. "Careful you don't get mixed up with the new recruits."
"What's going on?" Shara asked coming up to the table behind Cassian and dropping her own tray in front of the seat next to him.
"Cassian has regressed to his teen years," Jyn supplied happily.
"You pop a public boner or something?" Shara asked glancing over at him. "Holy shit, what'd you do?"
Jyn burst into laughter again and Cassian flicked some of his food at her in annoyance. "You're both overreacting."
Shara stood up in her chair. "Kes, get over here, you gotta see this!"
Cassian was pretty sure if he could crawl under the table without causing more of a commotion, he'd do it. This is what he got for making friends. He focused on his food and ignored the next round of laughter at his expense as Kes joined the table.
"Aw, I think we hurt his feelings," Shara cooed throwing her arm around his shoulders. "Don't worry Andor, the girls will love it. Makes you look vulnerable and cuddly."
"The key word being 'girls'," Kes added.
"Hey, some boys will probably like it too!" Jyn hooted.
"I hate having human friends," Cassian said sending them into another round of merriment as he focused on his food. He spotted Solo and the princess entering the mess and girded himself for the next onslaught. The last thing he needed was the smuggler joining in on the ridicule.
Jyn followed his eye line and whistled low under her breath. "Oh man, he looks pissed." Leia snapped something at him and Solo threw up his hands and stormed back the way he'd come. "Ugh, we have a mission tomorrow afternoon. I'm going to be regaled with hour-long ice-princess rants. Maybe I can slip sedatives in his caf."
Leia stormed her way over without even grabbing food and threw herself in the seat next to Jyn. "That stupid nerf herder is impossible. I don't know how you work with him."
"Mainly I ignore him," Jyn said helpfully slipping some food under the table for the loth-cat at her feet.
"I can't imagine how," Leia said with a pout that was entirely beneath her. She glanced up and gave a start. "Captain Andor," she said with an overly polite nod.
"You can laugh," Shara said with a grin.
"I don't know what you're referencing Lieutenant Bey," Leia said folding her hands diplomatically.
"She means Captain Andor's face," Kes supplied helpfully.
"Oh?" Leia asked primly, but he could hear the edge of a chuckle in her voice.
"And I'm done," he said shoving his tray away from him.
"Cassian, its not that bad," Jyn said with barely suppressed mirth. He stood up and she snagged his sleeve with her fingers. "We're sorry."
"I'm not," Kes crowed.
Jyn glared at Kes and tugged more insistently making him sit again. "It's nice. You won't give anyone pash rash this way."
"What?" he asked as Shara started to giggle.
"You know, pash rash."
"What in the world is that?" Leia asks.
Jyn looks around the table as if for help, but Cassian had never heard the phrase before and Shara just grinned and clearly had little interest in helping Jyn explain. "It's the rash you get on your face when you make out with someone who has a beard for too long."
"And how would you know about that Sargent Erso?" Kes asked with an innocent smile.
"Oh, shut up," Jyn said rolling her eyes.
"Well, Cassian better get to it before his five o'clock shadow kicks in," Shara said gleefully. "So many girls on base, so little time. You won't leave any evidence, now's the time to strike."
He hated them all.
"Don't be rude," Jyn said sourly. "You know Lieutenant Awn is off base."
Cassian frowned and wondered if he'd missed something. "What's that got to do with anything?"
"Oh, I just thought," Jyn started and then stopped. "Well, I thought you were a one woman kind of man."
What the kriff did that mean? "What are you talking about?"
Jyn turned a shade of red he hadn't seen before and ducked her head reaching down below the table to pull the loth-cat into her lap like a comfort blanket. "I just thought. I mean you can do whatever you want."
"Wait," Leia said with wide-eyes. "You and Lieutenant Awn?"
"Me and Lieutenant Awn, what?" he demanded seeing a similar look on Shara's face and bewilderment on Kes'.
"Since when did you and Lieutenant Awn start knocking boots?" Shara demanded. "What did she do to get the upstanding Captain Andor to drop his pants with a subordinate? The Alliance rumor mill will need to know if only for future replication, and as your friend I should have access to the information."
Cassian fell back on his training to school his face into a neutral expression, when all he really wanted to do was stare at them all in horror. What exactly had the rumor mill been saying about him, and why did they think he was sleeping with Awn? "Who told you Lieutenant Awn and I were together?"
Leia and Shara turned sharply to look at Jyn who sunk down in her seat. "You just seemed close," Jyn said glancing at him from under her lashes and then refocusing her gaze on the loth-cat. "I didn't mean to out you."
"Out me?" Cassian asked stunned. What in the hell had given Jyn the idea that he and Ali were anything other than professional partners? Sure, he'd cared for her when she was sick and wounded, but there hadn't been anything sexual about it. "Lieutenant Awn and I are partners, nothing more."
"You don't have to hide it, Cassian," Leia said eagerly, clearly looking for a story to distract herself. "You just have to file some paperwork to make it official and it's no problem at all."
"We can double date," Shara added with a laugh.
"Only problem being, we're not together," Cassian said firmly.
"Oh, don't be that way. We're all friends here," Leia said. "You deserve some happiness. You've been alone for as long as I've known you, which is ridiculous considering how many women on base would be eager to volunteer. It'd actually be good to have a real reason to shut down all the girls swooning over mysterious Captain Andor."
Cassian fought a blush. He'd had no idea about any of this. He'd always kept his head down and done his job. Of course there'd been a few trysts here and there, but they'd always been a simple transaction of needs met and done discreetly. "Lieutenant Awn and I have a purely professional relationship," he said resolutely. "She has a long-term boyfriend back on her home planet. They've been dating since they were teenagers, but he needs to help support his family on the farm they own and couldn't join the Alliance with her. I don't know what gave you the idea we were otherwise, but I don't think her boyfriend would appreciate it."
"That's a pity," Leia said with a sigh. "We could have used a good romance on base."
"Hey!" Shara yelled.
"You two are old news," Leia said waving her outrage away. "And besides you were both obviously in love since you met. There was no suspense. Who doesn't like a good 'they were posing as husband and wife for a job, but then actually fell in love' story? It's straight out of a holodrama."
"Sorry to disappoint," he offered. Perhaps that's why Jyn had thought what she did – too many holodramas gone to her head? Although he expected that more out of Bodhi than her.
"Well, you could go on a kissing spree as a consolation prize," Leia offered. "That'd give the base gossip for weeks."
"I'll get to work on that," Cassian said dryly. He finished off his food and moved to stand again. "If you'll excuse me."
"Enjoy yourself!" Kes yelled after him and he shook his head.
He was halfway down the hall and back to his room when he felt a small, but insistently strong hand on his elbow. He stopped and rounded on Jyn.
"I'm sorry," she blurted.
"For what?"
"For implying you were sleeping with Lieutenant Awn. I didn't mean to start any rumors."
"It's fine, but why would you even think that?"
"You two just seem close whenever I see you together," Jyn said looking embarrassed.
"That tends to happen when you have to go undercover with someone in enemy territory with only each other as back up."
"You said her name in bed."
He winced at that. They never really talked about the one night she'd spent in his bed and she'd avoided commenting when he'd said the wrong name so he'd hoped she just hadn't heard him. "I was just waking up and out of it. When we're undercover we share a bed and sometimes a small one. You can't always keep your own personal space. It didn't mean anything."
"I just assumed," Jyn said. "I shouldn't have. I really am sorry."
He shook his head. "It's fine. No harm done." She started to open her mouth and then stopped. "What is it?"
"Your face isn't so bad."
He lifted an eyebrow. "Is that really the best you can do to get back in my good graces?"
"It's just different. You don't look like you. You look like," she paused, and a hand came up to tentatively touch his smooth cheek. He held himself very still for fear of scaring her off. "Like this, you look like maybe you weren't in the Rebellion your whole life. Maybe you didn't have to do certain things in the name of the greater good. Maybe you didn't have to follow me into a suicide run for one last desperate hope."
"I look simpler?" he offered, hating the fact that it was probably true.
She dropped her hand. "Yeah," she agreed. "Simpler. Younger and more approachable."
"I'll keep that under advisement," he turned and headed for his room suddenly exhausted all over again and for very different reasons. Her hand sliding into his stopped him instantly.
"So you'll grow it back?"
"I thought it was simpler?"
"Who said that was better? I like you," she stated firmly. "Old and weather-worn."
"Jyn," he half laughed at her description.
"We match better that way." Something tugged in his chest and his first impulse was to pull her to him, but he fought it viciously. She wouldn't appreciate it. Instead he settled with squeezing the hand that was still holding his.
"You left some things in my room." He wanted to kick himself for the non sequitur, but quiet moments weren't something he was good at.
She instantly turned bright red, ducked her head, and dropped his hand. "Shit, I'm really sorry."
"It's no big deal. I just figured you might want your toothbrush eventually. Is the power actually ok in your quarters?"
"Yeah." She paced him with Rogue trotting at her heels as they headed for his room. "I should have gone back earlier, your quarters are just way more convenient. I never wanted to get promoted till I found out you score better digs."
Cassian smiled and keyed the door open, laughing when Rogue slipped passed him with absolute confidence that he owned the place. The loth-cat jumped up into the bed and curled up clearly intent on sleeping right there.
"Sorry," Jyn said moving to scoop the loth-cat back up. She set him on the floor and headed for the 'fresher only to have Rogue jump back onto the bed. "I'll get him on my way out." She entered the tiny 'fresher and came back out with her belongings in her hands, frowning as she clearly debated how she was going to pick up the loth-cat too. "Come on Rogue. Time to go." Rogue lifted his head and blinked at her slowly before lowering it back down onto his paws. Cassian leaned against the wall and watched in amusement. Jyn walked over and balanced awkwardly on one foot, poking the loth-cat with the toe of her boot. "Come on fuzzbutt, let's go. I'm leaving you." She started for the door and looked exasperated back at the stationary feline. "He usually follows pretty good. Come on, Rogue." The loth-cat yawned in her general direction. "Ok, looks like I'm going to need a bag and then I can carry him."
"Do you want to stay?" It was out of his mouth before he could think about it and her surprised face jolted him into a sputtering explanation. "I just mean for a while. It's still early. We could watch a holodrama or something if you want. I'm sure someone has the latest episode of The Princess Spy on the base's intranet."
"It's on hiatus," Jyn said still looking mildly surprised. "And Bodhi would kill us if we watched it without him anyway."
"We could always just watch it again with him later."
Jyn looked horrified. "Cassian, that's a direct violation of the holodrama friendship viewing code."
"The what?"
"You can't just go behind someone's back and watch a show you're watching together without them!"
"But you can re-watch it with them later. What does it matter?"
"It's not as pure," Jyn said urgently. "It's like you're keeping dirty secrets from your friend the entire time you know what's about to happen in the show and they don't. You have to experience the story together."
"Oook." He wasn't entirely convinced of her argument, but she looked so passionate about it, and he cared so little, it wasn't worth fighting about. "I guess that's goodnight then?"
"There are other holoshows," she said quickly. She looked down at her toiletries in her hands and then discarded them on his desk before turning back to him. "Do you have a holoprojector?"
"Yeah, a little old, but it works." He didn't mention that he'd specifically bought it three missions ago with her and Bodhi in mind. He grabbed the thing off a shelf and handed it to her letting her set it up.
"Ok, we've got a few options," Jyn said kicking off her boots and shamelessly crawling into his bed, pulling Rogue into her lap as she went. "What genres do you usually like?"
"I honestly never watched holoshows too much in the past," he said taking his own shoes off. Draven had occasionally screened things for intelligence agents just so they could keep up-to-date on pop culture that was likely to be referenced in the field, but that was generally clips with extended summaries.
"You read don't you? What do you like to read?"
"I mainly read mission briefs."
"Stop being difficult," she chastised poking him in the thigh with her foot as he sat.
"I mostly read historical things and nonfiction."
Jyn made a face. "I don't want to watch a documentary. We need a show, a series. What about a medical drama?" Cassian shrugged. Whatever Jyn wanted was fine with him. "Oh, I know! There's this detective show everyone on base has been talking about. I bet you'd like that. What do you think?"
"Sounds great," he said easily. He honestly didn't care what they watched. If he could get through The Princess Spy he could get through anything. Jyn found the right programming on the bases' intranet where people had illegally downloaded tons of things from the HoloNet securely so it couldn't be traced back to base. Officially command frowned on the practice, but didn't actually shut it down. Cassian thought there might be a revolt if they did. People liked their entertainment.
He was jolted out of these thoughts as Jyn snuggled back against the wall and leaned against him. He tentatively put his arm around her waist to have it in a more comfortable position and she didn't push him away. Instead she curled down closer and Rogue repositioned himself so he was sprawled across both their laps. Cassian reached his free hand down and ran it through the loth-cat's fur earning himself a low happy rumbling purr. Maybe if he was lucky the power would go out in her quarters again. He could get used to this.
A/N: Thank you all for the birthday wishes! They really made my week! Alright so we've finally got half of the relationship misunderstanding out in the open just a little ways to go, luckily they're both idiots and will probably drag it out for a few more chapters ;)