Mr. Coffee: I don't even want to know HOW Ruffles Man was able to ascertain the true identity of the culprit...

"The Thief Who Stole My Heart"
Starring Witness Lynn Gweeny!

Miles: *finger tapping on forearm mode* How is it my investigations always end up at Gatewater Land? My desire is to avoid anything related to that wriggling piece of plywood at all costs!

Kay: Well I'M happy to be back at your side as your ACE assistant, Mr. Edgeworth!

Miles: For the record, I'M not the one who called you that! It was title YOU thereby dubbed upon your person all by YOURSELF!

Kay: Admit it! You know you'd be lost without me! Hee! And crime doesn't stand a chance against me and Little Thief! After all…I AM the most righteous of the righteous! The legendary Great Thief! HOLD IT!

Miles: W-w-whoa! Kay! Don't jinx this case any worse than it already is with that sort of preamble! It's bad for my heart...

Kay: *dramatic pause* Even in the depths of night, when no other bird dares to take flight, one alone soars to shine the light of righteousness on the world's blight… You know the words, so say it with me!

Miles: *crosses arms* No.

Kay: Come on! Stop being such a buzz-kill! Even in the depths of night, when no other bird dares to take flight, one alone soars to shine the light of righteousness on the world's blight…

Lynn Gweeny: …And that one is me! For I am the Great Thief, Yatagarasu! Or, well, you not me, but anyway….

Kay: *beams* Now that's what I'm talking about, girl! At least not everyone here is stick in the mud! High Five!

Lynn Gweeny: *high fives Kay* Hello, Mr. Edgeworth, Kay. I'm Lynn Gweeny, the witness you two were supposed to meet regarding the crime of who had the audacity to come here, impersonate a police officer, try to get free food and free admission, and when he failed, proceeded to moon everyone with his bare buttocks before fleeing the scene.

(at the exact same time)

Miles: What?! What kind of cockamamie nonsense is this?

Kay: Cool! You know who we are?! That must mean you're an ACE AA Fan!

Lynn Gweeny: Guilty!

Kay: So, Lynn Gweeny, let's talk some more about your yen for AA! Fave and least fave game?

Lynn Gweeny: Gotta say Spirit of Justice for least favorite. Not because the game is bad but because the cases were too long and if I couldn't focus, so I couldn't' understand easily what was going on, unlike the original trilogy, which I prefer over the first AA1 game, but I would like to see AAI3 with story about Edgey's mother and Edgey's life in Germany with Herr Manfred and Franziska, as my favorite game is - AAI2! The twist made me almost got heart attack. Everything was so perfect, the soundtrack, the storyline, the character development…. Stupid Capcom for not localizing it. What a fatal mistake, baby!

Miles: Hmph! I could point out how this line of questioning is completely unrelated to the case, but that was actually true, so carry on, Lynn Gweeny. Favourite and least fave case?

Lynn Gweeny: Least favorite - Turnabout Big Top, what a ridiculous case. Favorite - Bridge to the Turnabout. And The Forgotten Turnabout. I cried for one liter of tears! Wah!

Kay: Oh you are too sweet! I just love you to pieces! Am I your fave assistant, too?

Lynn Gweeny: You're tied with Maya. She and Phoenix are my second OTP though. Narumayo, I think I don't need to explain more, cross a burning bridge, risked his reputation as a lawyer to protect Maya…. what a beautiful bond!

Miles: Yes, Wright was always the romantic fool for love! But I can't fault you for loving those two fools together. Dare I ask who your FIRST place pairing is then?

Lynn Gweeny: Well YOU guys, Kayworth (Edgeworth x Kay) of course!

*both blush madly*

Miles/Kay: *simultaneously* Us?! Why?!

Lynn Gweeny: Why? Ah, if I say all my answers it would turn into a novel. Their relationship is so beautiful in AAI2, when Edgeworth risked his prosecutor's badge just to protect Kay even though they only knew each other for a while, it shows they have a strong bond. And Kay's reaction with: "Why would you go that far just for me…?" Ahh so beautiful! But HOLD IT! They have 9 years age gap! Well, it's only 9 years age gap, it isn't weird, in my country even there is a 16 years old boy married with a 74 years old woman! Age is just a number, isn't it? *impish grin*

Miles: *still red*: Ahem, yes, well, moving on… Maya Fey or Trucy Wright?

Lynn Gweeny: I can't choose. I choose you, Pikachu! *vanishes*

Kay: I got one! Phoenix Wright or Apollo Justice?

Lynn Gweeny: Phoenix Wright! Because there will be no Ace Attorney if he isn't around! If Capcom ever announced no more Phoenix, I'd scream: HOLD IT! OBJECTION! THAT'S SO OBJECTIONABLEEEEEE! At least first make a backstory about Phoenix's parents, dammit! Also, about AJ game - I liked Ema more in RFTA than in AJ – she was so grumpy! But at least we had hobo Nick, who I'd prefer over college Feenie! Hobo Phoenix because he is so handsome and yummy *slurp*

Miles: Uurrngh! That is my childhood best friend you are openly drooling over, Miss Lynn Gweeny!

Kay: Jealous much? Don't deny it! Hee!

Lynn Gweeny: Don't get worked up Mr. Edgeworth!

Miles: Ngh! I-I'm not worked up over anyone! A-And I'm NOT jealous!

Lynn Gweeny: For what it's worth, my favorite prosecutor is the one and only Miles Edgeworth! Handsome, elegant, and his lines are so priceless! Plus he looked a bit like my ex! XD

Kay: Huh. So your ex-BF was all uptight and barely smiled either, huh?

Miles: OBJECTION! I DO smile…I just see nil point in walking around all the time grinning like an idiot!

Kay: Yeah, yeah, keep being in denial, you sourpuss!

Miles: What?! I am NOT in denial!

Kay: Anyway…Tee hee! Lynn Gweeny – fave witness?

Lynn Gweeny: The one and only Larry Butz, because he makes me laugh until I fall off my chair!

Dick Gumshoe: Hey pals! Kay! Mr. Edgeworth! I just saw the security tape of the man who mooned everyone while the witness was present! Take a look!

*pops surveillance tape in and Lynn Gweeny and Kay immediately start giggling at the sight of the man's VERTICAL SMILE filling up the screen while Miles recoils*

Miles: Arngh! Gumshoe – are you trying to make me cut your salary again after just giving you a raise?! A little warning before springing another man's posterior upon me – HOLD IT! I know that rear! That's no mere butt! That's…. LARRY'S butt!

Gumshoe: Ew! Larry?! What the hell!

Kay: Well, at least we found our culprit! Lynn Gweeny, don't worry, you won't need to identify his butt in a lineup – the priceless look on Mr. Edgeworth's face is conclusive proof enough that we've CRACKED the case!

Gumshoe: This really shouldn't surprise me. After all, when something smells…

Kay and Lynn Gweeny : *singsong in unison* It's probably the Butz!