Author's Note: I'm off to the beach again for a few days, so I thought I'd leave you guys an update again. :) Theme song of the chapter is 'Service Bell' by Grizzly Bear (preferable the version featuring Feist). Now, continuing with the angst-fest...

Chapter Ten: I Will Hold On

"I know what you're doing, Sonny," Tawni said, gently pushing the brunette back on the couch in their shared dressing room and straddling her.

"Do you now?' Sonny replied coyly.

"Uh huh," the blonde leaned down and kissed the girl beneath her. "I know your plan exactly."

"And what is that?" Sonny asked, playing ignorant.

Tawni grinned and leaned to the side, propping her head up on her elbow. "You think that by holding out on me you'll make me have some epiphany about the 'true value of physical intimacy' or something like that. You think you'll change my attitude about sex."

"Maybe I just want to torture you a bit," Sonny responded, nonchalantly.

"Torturing someone isn't your thing."

"There are always exceptions."

Tawni shook her head, unconvinced. "You couldn't pull it off. You aren't the vindictive type."

"You aren't the girlfriend type either, right? And yet, here you are."

"Hmm," Tawni kissed her again. "Here I am."

A hand on her shoulder gently shook the blonde out of her revelry.

"Huh?" Tawni turned and looked up the arm, her gaze ending on the concerned face of a nurse. Her name was Annie and she had been on-duty the last few days.

"You need to eat something, dear," Annie insisted. She'd been at this for the last forty-eight hours at least.

Tawni rolled her eyes. "I'm not hungry."

"You need to eat all the same," the nurse patted her shoulder. "Come on, I'll eat with you. We'll be quick, I promise. Come on now."

Reluctantly, Tawni got to her feet and followed Annie out of the room and off toward the cafeteria.

They pulled into the hospital parking lot and hurried inside.

"I'm sorry, visiting hours are between-"

"Please, we just found out," Sonny pleaded. "We'll be quick. We just want to-"

"I'm sorry, there's nothing I can do."

Zora tilted her head to the side, catching sight of something flickering on the woman's iPhone: an episode of Mackenzie Falls. "You a Mack Falls fan?"

"What? Oh, yes," the woman said, noticing the girl's gaze falling on the phone. "It's my favorite show."

Zora gestured back at Chad, who'd taken a seat and was waiting for Sonny to sort things out. He rose to his feet and joined them at the table.

"Visiting hours are over," Zora informed him. "But, she's a Falls fan."

Leaning over the counter toward the woman and flashing his best Mackenzie smile. "Are you sure?"

"Omigod! Chad Dylan Cooper!"

"So, are you certain there isn't a way you can sneak us in, just for a few minutes?"

"You mean like Mackenzie and Chloe did in season 3 when Mackenzie's half-father was in a coma from a sailing accident?"

"Exactly," he winked. "That's a classic episode."

"I suppose a few minutes wouldn't hurt."

Tawni wasn't in the room when they found it, at the far end of the ICU, but Charlie was. He was hooked up to a ventilator, bandages covering his face and arms.

A nurse appeared a few seconds later. "Are you kids supposed to be here? I was told he had no other relatives and at this hour only close relatives are permitted-"

"He's our friend's uncle. We just wanted to make sure everything was ok," Zora replied.

"How is he doing?" Sonny asked, not taking her eyes from Charlie lying in the hospital bed.

"He's stable. He hasn't woken up yet, but he is showing signs of brain activity. It's still hard to say at this point, I'm afraid. You're friends of Tawni, then? She went to the cafeteria... finally. Poor girl hasn't eaten in days. Another nurse here, Annie, dragged her off to eat something. I imagine she'll be back soon- she doesn't like to leave his side for long. You can say hi and then you need to leave and you're welcome to come back tomorrow during visiting hours."

The three of them nodded in unison and the nurse stepped back out of the room, a little hesitant. They stood there, silently, each of them entirely unsure of what to say.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Tawni's voice came from behind them, interrupting their silent vigil.

"Tawni-" Sonny started, only to be cut off by the blonde.

"I texted you, Chad. Just you."

"Sonny and Zora were with me," he shrugged.

"We just wanted to make sure everything was OK," Zora offered.

"Go home," the blonde growled."I don't want you here."

"Listen, we get that things aren't... that you're kind of freaking out...with all of this..." Chad tried to calm her down, to know avail.

"I'm-" Tawni stopped herself, trying to control her temper. "I'm going to walk to the end of the hall and back and when I get back here, you're all going to be gone, OK?"

She turned on her heel and marched off, out of sight.

The three exchanged slightly confused glanced, not positive whether they should obey their friends order or not.

Suddenly, Chad turned to Zora, grabbed the tiny microphone still pinned to her jacket and turned it on. Then he hurried out of the room after Tawni, gesturing for the girls to wait there.

He turned on his own corresponding microphone just as he caught up with Tawni. "Hey."

She whirled around angrily, but upon just seeing Chad alone, her rage swiftly dissipated. "Why'd you bring her?"

"Because you actually like her. You don't like me. Why would you tell me about this and not Sonny? You had to know I'd tell her."

"No, I didn't, I just... wanted some company," Tawni mumbled. "And you texted and I figured...you knew Charlie. He helped you out when your dad threw you out. I don't like you, but I knew you'd come."

"And Sonny wouldn't?"

"Of course she would! She'd be here holding my hand and bringing me coffee and doing everything she could possibly do for me..."

"And that's a bad thing?"

Tawni didn't reply, only crossed her arms in frustration and turned away from him again.

He waited a moment before changing the subject. "So...do they know who did it?"

"The police don't," she replied, still not looking at him.

"But you do?" he asked.

She nodded. "I can't- it was the worst thing I've ever... coming in here, in the middle of the night and... they wouldn't let me see him. He was in surgery. He was bleeding into his brain. And they made me wait and no one told me anything. They called me in and the police wanted to know all these things and... it was so awful. It was a day and a half before I could even see him. It was the longest day and a half in my life."

Chad nodded, placing a hand on her shoulder. "You should've called us. We all would've come out here. Maybe we couldn't fix anything, but we could be here with you. It would be easier if you weren't alone."

Tawni shook her head. "My parents came by. They acted all shocked and devastated when the doctors were around. And my Mom...I don't know about her. But my Dad? He didn't care at all. He... He told me it was a trial run for Charlie-his house burning down was just a taste of the hellfire that awaits him. That's what he said. And he said that it was waiting for me too if I didn't fix myself. And Sonny... he said he would... he said he would hate it if it she had to get hurt too, before I learned my lesson. He said it with a smile."

"You need to tell the cops, Tawni, if he really had something to do with it-"

"He didn't say he did. I just... it's just the way he said it. And I told him I'd broken up with Sonny because I didn't want him to go after her too. And because I didn't- I hate the way this feels. Waiting for news...if he's ever going to wake up. I just...I don't care about a lot of people. Charlie is my only family and I hate this so, so much. And Sonny... I just... I can't do this again, if something happened to her? I can't do it."

"Tawni, that's-"

"No, it's the truth. I can't do this. Not caring about anyone is a hell of a lot easier. You never have to go through this if you don't care about other people. I want that back. It was simple. I can't go through this again."

"You don't know that you ever will."

She just shook her head emphatically. "I can't do it. Now... just go home, OK? And tell Sonny to stay away. It's for her own good. You don't want anything to happen to her either, I know, and my Dad is...I don't know what he'd do to her, if he'd do this to his own brother. I just... I don't know. So keep her away."

She turned away from him then, and leaned against the window pane at the end of the hall, peering out over the streetlights.

He sighed and headed back to the room, gesturing for Sonny and Zora to follow him out.

Zora went quickly- the whole situation being too heavy for her. Sonny hesitated in the doorway, looking down the hall toward the window where Tawni stood, her back to them.

"I should stay," she said, her voice barely above a whisper.

He shook his head. "Not now."

"We have to tell the police."

"I don't know, Sonny. The police are investigating already. Tawni suspects him but... I mean, her dad is a jerk. He could've just been being an ass. She doesn't know for sure that he did it or that he had anything to do with it."

"But you still want me to leave because you think he did and you're worried he'll come after me next?" she asked, indignantly.

"Sonny-"

"I need to talk to her," she started down the hall, toward the blonde, only to be stopped by Chad grabbing her by the crook in her elbow.

"No, Sonny," he insisted. "It's not a good time. She's..." he hesitated, glancing down the hall at Tawni's silhouette. Somehow he just knew that she was aware of them both standing there, watching her. And she wasn't turning around because she didn't want to see Sonny, because chances were Sonny was the only one Tawni had wanted to call these past few days. Even had they not been dating, Sonny would've been the one she called. And she couldn't bring herself to do it for her own fears, fears for her own broken heart and for the sake of Sonny's life. Something in the rigidity of her posture, the apparent determination in her fixed stance, staring out over the busy streets below, told Chad all of this and more- because he knew Tawni better than he knew himself and at his lowest points he was never able to face anyone who mattered to him. He had never been in a situation quite this bad, but he knew how she felt all the same: like if she turned around right now, she just might shatter.

"Maybe tomorrow, Sonny," he said, pulling her after him. "Maybe try again tomorrow."

It took every ounce of strength Sonny had to force herself to turn away and follow him to where Zora was waiting for them by the elevator that would take them to the parking garage.

While they waited for it to reach their floor, she looked back and watched Tawni at the window. She pulled her phone out of her pocket and quickly typed a text message to the blonde.

She watched as Tawni looked at the screen of her own phone, staring at it long enough for Sonny to assume she was reading the message: Remember- I'll always let you in.

The elevator dinged and Sonny boarded with the others. Tawni put her phone back in her pocket and crossed her arms. By the time the doors closed and she was out of Sonny's sight, she still hadn't turned around.