"Blaine, I don't get it. I know you had no obligation to, but why didn't you tell me?" Kurt asked. He was sitting cross-legged on the end of Blaine's bed, while Blaine was lying on his back, hands crossed underneath his pillow.

"I didn't want to worry you." Blaine leant on his clichéd answer, but Kurt wasn't having a bar of it.

"No, that's not it. You knew you'd have to eventually, you pretty much said that in the coffee shop this afternoon. I know you work really hard keeping up that wall of perfect dapperness, but this is out of your control, so I don't think it's that…" Kurt thought aloud. "So just… why?"

Blaine rubbed his nose almost absentmindedly, arguments running amok through his mind like petulant children in a proverbial confectionary. "Well… that's partly it." He spoke softly, eyes flicking at Kurt's before very quickly fixing themselves somewhere over his shoulder. "But this disease… While it's a part of me, it's a weakness. It either forces people to look after me, or forces them away from me. Either way, I get treated differently because of that. You've noticed how Wes and David are always more cautious over me than any of the others? And just… I've done enough to screw this up, I honestly can't believe you're still my friend after everything that's happened, I didn't need more to push you away." His voice wavered, cracking on the final syllable, and Blaine rolled over, burying his face in his pillow. "Why don't you hate me?" He spat, full of self-loathing.

A whimper of sympathy escaped Kurt's throat. "Blaine, you need to listen to me right now. I don't know what happened to you in your past, and I won't force you to relive it any time soon – especially not tonight when you're obviously sick and only this week you had your heart ripped out of your chest." Kurt drew a deep breath, trying to steady his voice and ignore the twinge in his own heart. "You are a brilliant person. You're happy, you're friendly, you're so strong. I can't convince you that you are worthy, not just of all of our friendship but also of our respect – but I'm happy to wait until you've found that out for yourself."

"I don't deserve you." Blaine wailed into his mattress. "Kurt, why are you doing this to me? You can do so much better than me. Please, don't torment me with the false hope that I can ever be enough for you."

Kurt gasped, shaking his head. "Holy crap. Wevid were right."

"Wevid? What's Wevid? And what were they right about?"

Kurt exhaled quickly through his nose, his mouth raising in a wry smile. "Wes and David. I guess it's a New Directions thing, they give their couples names, probably to make summarising them easier to outsiders… And they told me pretty much exactly what you just said… Though I don't think they've got any idea why, either…"

"Why what?"

Kurt shook his head. "Why you always put absolutely everyone before yourself, even at the risk of your health or sanity. And why you lock absolutely everything away."

Blaine rolled to his side, eyes squeezed shut. "I don't want to pretend everything's fine, Kurt. But I have to." His voice was barely a whisper. "It hurts too much to do anything else."

Kurt hesitated, then put a hand on his shoulder. "What does, Blaine?"

"Everything." Blaine broke. "Every day I wake up, I do my business, I go around with a smile on my face. If I don't smile, people ask what's wrong. And then I stop and think about all the absolute crap that is my life and I just can't deal with that. And then I show this hideous side of me, this needy whingy selfish pile of crap. I don't want to feel so false, I really want that happy person to be me. So why can't it be, Kurt? Why can't I just be the dapper person that everyone loves? Why does that whole illusion have to be just that – an illusion?"

"Blaine…" Kurt lay down next to his friend as the whole bed shook with tears. "There are two sides to every person. You are that bubbly friendly nutjob. But you have to realise that this is part of you too. You just don't have to let it dominate you."

"Dammit, Kurt, can you not be so fucking perfect? Just for one moment, please? We aren't all like you, you know. We aren't all so confident."

Kurt snorted sardonically, sitting back upright. "Honey, you honestly think I don't have these moments? Or that I don't have my own faults? I'm a diva, for Christ sake. But really, what do you want from me? Do you want me to get angry? Because if you need an argument, I think we've had enough drama for the day."

The room quivered with tension, vibrating with each breath from the boys. Then Blaine snaked a hand out from underneath the covers and grabbed Kurt's. "I want a friend." His voice was hoarse, breaking on alternate syllables. "No, I need a friend. I want… something else. But what we want and what we get are two completely different things."

All his bottled up anger rushed out in Kurt's next breath and he found himself lying down again on top of the doona, fingers lacing with Blaine's. "You've had a crazy week. It's not fair on you right now. Believe me, I want it just as much as you do, if not more. But I don't want you believing I just said this to make you feel better. So… friends?"

Blaine snuggled closer to Kurt. "Okay, I can live with that for now. Besides, you need to see just how flawed I am, see how many mistakes I've made, before you can really make that decision."

"Oh, Blaine." Kurt ran his free hand through Blaine's loose curls, inhaling quietly and opening his mouth.

You're so mean when you talk

About yourself; you are wrong.

Change the voices in your head,

Make them like you instead.

Kurt smoothed away a few of Blaine's tears, his wavering voice much softer than usual, trying to convince the boy of his worth through the song.

So complicated, look how big you'll make it,

Filled with so much hatred, such a tired game.

It's enough, I've done all I can think of,

Chased down all my demons, see you do the same.

Blaine's breathing began to even out and become heavier, his body melting into the sheets as much-needed sleep finally decided to steal him away again.

Wes and David smiled as they saw the two boys on the bed, slowly walking in and effortlessly harmonising with Kurt.

Kurt kept singing, singing for Blaine, singing for himself, singing for all his friends out there, for all the people who needed it. His experiences, his thoughts, his emotions echoed in his notes and reverberated through their hearts.

Pretty, pretty please, don't you ever, ever feel

Like you're less than, less than perfect.

Pretty, pretty please, if you ever, ever feel

Like you're nothing, you are perfect

To me.

Okay. Not quite where I was expecting this... I was thinking I'd tell a bit about Blaine's past, but it sort of became his present. No matter, I don't feel too bad about this chapter. It's a little choppy, but I'm not really sure how to fix that... I haven't really written angst before. Sickfics I can write 'til the cows come home, but angst is completely new. It was a little hard as well, I've tried to make Blaine as real and honest as I can. But it's based on what I go through (I have obsessive-compulsive personality disorder) and I actually don't feel a whole lot at all really, so I don't know how well that gets across to people...

Not that I'm saying it's healthy. This year I've been working really hard on actually feeling things and gaining control over my emotions without having to lock them away and go numb. It's hard, but it's definitely possible and definitely worth it. And if any of you reading this ever need some help, whether it's someone to talk to or advice or whatever, I'm here. You can PM me, you can send me an ask on Tumblr (pi-on-a-skateboard . tumblr . com, without the spaces).

And yes, I do know that Klaine are singing Perfect on Wednesday. No, that's not why I put it in here. I just think the lyrics fit perfectly. Hehehe, really witty Steph. Yeah, shut up. It's nearly 0200. You have to be up in 4.5 hours for work. Ugh. Silly babysitting!

Yes. So slightly less rambling tonight?

Shout outs to Different Child, riker-rocky-ross-lynchlover795 and Brook-Lucas-Fan-23. Thanks to everyone so far who has read, favourited, alerted and reviewed! Especially to the reviews, they really motivate me to get writing. It's so much easier when I know people read this and appreciate it - even more so when they tell me what they want in the story! And constructive criticism is always nice, like I've said many times before, I'm always looking to improve! :D

So. Love me? Hate me? Want Perfect to be released early so that I collapse and suffer a myocardial infarction or stroke of some form and can't write for you any more? Please let me know!

Keep smiling! :D