I Own Nothing! Thanks to Absidoodle :P
Hermione crawled out of bed the next morning, exhausted from the night's events. After she had returned, both Harry and Ron had quizzed her on McGonagall, but she had resolutely stood her ground and kept the older witch's secrets, replying with the barest of details. Thankfully, after a few shrewd looks, they had both agreed that as long as it didn't hurt her, they would leave it be. They did, however, enjoy a few good minutes cursing the Malfoy family, which amused Hermione greatly. Any excuse!
When the night had finally ended, Hermione discovered that Minerva had retired without her. Deciding to let the woman be for a while, she too slept through the night, peaceful and content – but upon waking up, Hermione wondered if she should talk to Minerva. Although the elder woman was very independent, it was clear that she too needed love and support from time to time.
When she walked into the kitchen, Hermione was pleasantly surprised to be greeted by another cup of tea.
"Hello, dear."
Minerva was sitting quietly in her robes, smiling at her guest. Hermione murmured a reply, then asked for the day's jobs. "Oh, nothing today. Even headmistresses get a winter holiday, Hermione." She winked. "They only work me into the ground when the alternative is that the ministry deal with the issue."
Hermione smiled amicably and sat down opposite her, grabbing a slice of toast as Minerva watched her beadily. "Minerva… About last night. I-"
"You must never tell anyone of Melody." Her tone was sharp, and Hermione winced.
"I know, and I had no intention to. I just wanted to know whether or not you were still feeling sad." Minerva's eyebrow rose, before she softened.
"Then I apologise. I just… I am better, thank you."
Hermione smiled widely and bit into her toast. "Well that's something." She said around it. "So what are you planning to do today?"
~~~/~~~
The rest of the day passed quickly, with the two going their separate ways to catch up with their friends. Hermione herself went to chat with Ginny and Luna, and also visited Hogsmeade briefly to buy her various presents.
Minerva on her part spent most of her time with Poppy, Pomona and Filius, catching up; then she finished the last grading she had to do.
When the two reconvened in Minerva's office at nine o'clock, it was with a happier and more rested atmosphere than before. Both women bore a genuine smile and greeted each other happily.
Ten minutes later, when both were settled and reading in Minerva's quarters, a gleeful and plotting Hermione peeked over the side of her book to study Minerva.
"… Minerva?" She asked almost timidly.
"Yes, Hermione?"
"Will you try something with me?" the girl asked. Minerva looked at her quizzically before she got up and hurried out of the room. She chatted while out of the room, loudly so Minerva could hear her, but lowered her voice as she re-entered. "Well, I came across a few games today; I wondered whether you'd like to learn how to play them. I know how much you like chess; these are some muggle games." She laid out a few boards, each brightly lit and containing various components, and stepped back. Minerva blinked, looked at Hermione and then again at the boards before smiling bemusedly, and nodding her assent.
"Excellent!" Hermione mentally thanked Luna and her astute observations (for it was she who had commented on their professor's love of board games,) before asking her to choose a game. Drawn to the board most like her chess one, she picked draughts.
"Right. Listen carefully, then get ready to lose." Already, Hermione was gleeful at the prospect of besting one of her teachers.
~~~/~~~
"How did you…?" After five games of draughts, three of backgammon, and ten shorter games of connect four, Hermione was utterly gobsmacked at how quickly her professor picked up the rules. "You aren't supposed to be this good!" She protested. Minerva simply smirked.
"You did win some."
"Yes, but it was supposed to be easy!" The elder woman laughed at her competitive nature.
"You can't win everything." She told her. Hermione grumbled back, and Minerva missed the quiet words. "Pardon?" She asked.
"I said I usually do." Hermione repeated a little louder. Minerva tilted her head quizzically. "Whenever I played with mum or dad, I would always win. Quite easily too." Her expression slowly became more sombre and she began packing the set away.
"Hermione?" Minerva tried. The girl in question seemed to snap out of her daze instantaneously.
"Sorry?"
"Is everything alright?" Hermione looked sideways at her, considering whether or not to brush over the question. Despite what she had already told Minerva, it hadn't become any easier to talk to her. Then she remembered Minerva's trust the previous night.
"No." She sighed, making her decision.
"…It helps if you talk, or so I've learnt." Minerva leaned in slightly, intent on helping her younger friend.
Hermione sighed, and leaned into her chair. "I'm just tired."
"This cannot be cured with caffeine." Her lips quirked, and she nudged the younger girl. "I want to help." Hermione sighed, but assented and carefully examined her feet.
"It's my parents." Minerva stilled, aware of how much this issue still hurt Hermione. "I just…I miss them so much. More and more each day. Sometimes I forget, but then when I remember I feel even worse." She looked at Minerva, her expression fearful. "Am I a bad person?"
Her answer was instant. "No."
"But I should have given them the choice! I should've kept a closer eye on them! I should be out looking for them now!"
"Hermione." The girl flinched and looked at her. "Yes, you could have, may have and should have done many things, but you didn't. There will be many times in your life where this sort of moment occurs, where you wish with all your heart you could take something back, but the simple truth is you can't. You can never reverse an action, take back words, and there is no use dwelling on them. All you are achieving now is more heartache for yourself, which you do not deserve. I know this because you regret your actions. If you did not, then we wouldn't be here talking about this." There was a moment of uncomfortable silence. "You needed the time you took to recover and rest; there was no use gallivanting off around the Australian bush if you did not have the ability to find your parents. You are, or were, learning that ability here."
Hermione's eyes remained downcast as she frowned. Minerva racked her brains for something to comfort her, but came up with only a few simple words. "I know it hurts now, but you'll understand someday. Just think about it."
The brunette nodded and squirmed a little under Minerva's eye. "I don't suppose we can stop talking about this now?" she asked.
Minerva agreed, not altogether happily, before moving backwards on the sofa to resume her book. Hermione released a sigh, and went to speak to her boys.
The next day passed much the same, with Minerva avidly reading her books, whilst fighting memories from her own past.
~~~/~~~
"Minerva…"
"I'm busy, mother." The eldest McGonagall took a step forward, concerned for her child.
"Minerva, I know you are hurting, but you need to stop this campaign for revenge and move on."
Her daughter snarled and turned to face her, showing her hollow, dull, tired eyes and prominent cheek bones – the face of exhaustion.
"They took my daughter from me, and yet they live their lives as if nothing has happened! Where is the justice in that?" She shouted, shrugging the woman off her shoulder. She was determined to continue down her path.
"Minerva, I'm not asking for their sake, I'm asking for yours. Look at yourself!" Her mother rarely raised her voice, so normally this would've calmed Minerva down – but this time it only served to anger her further.
"I will not cease!" she screamed.
"You're going to ruin your life!" her mother countered loudly.
"That has already-" Minerva started to argue back, but her mother cut her off.
"You decided that, Minerva. I miss her too, but you aren't going to get her back by doing this! Certainly not in the way you are going about it." Her mother hesitated, her eyes unfocusing for a second before she looked at her daughter. "I suggest, if you are still out for revenge, that you talk to Albus. He will help you, and...you might survive longer." Without another word her mother turned away, shoulders hunched over, looking half the matriarch and powerful witch she was. As her mother left her, Minerva realised how much pain she had caused her and how much she had aged since they lost Melody… feeling something stir within her, Minerva frowned.
~~~/~~~
"Minerva?" The elder woman was abruptly pulled from her memories. "Are you alright?" She blinked for a few seconds, her eyes focusing on Hermione.
"…Yes. I was just thinking. What was it?"
Hermione fidgeted. "Could I… uh- borrow your fireplace to go see Harry and Ron?" She smiled apologetically. "I have a few late presents to drop off."
After a quick glance at the clock, and a small grimace once she'd realised what she was doing, Minerva nodded. 'She's not a child, and you agreed not to treat her as such.'
"Of course you may, but dinner is scheduled for nine o'clock…try to be back for then." Minerva told the girl. Hermione looked quite shocked for a moment, before smiling and nodding.
Once she was gone, Minerva looked at her book, before shaking her head. "You aren't going to get any reading done, Minerva. Perhaps…" Her thoughts turned to her home, and the memories it contained, and soon she found herself wandering towards her door.
~~~/~~~
"Hello, Minerva." The sudden arrival of her boss startled Minerva, and she looked up from her plans, frowning and feeling slightly annoyed at Albus's light tone.
"Albus." She had now created a near-perfect ice-cold temperature in her voice. The wizened old man seemed not to hear it, though. Seeing that he was about to let the silence hang in the air, she cursed his manner and spoke first. "What is it you seek, Albus?"
He beamed."Merely a few moments of your time Minerva, your mother requested I do."
Gritting her teeth, and wishing she could simply yell at him to leave, Minerva folded her arms before nodding curtly."You have it."
Yet again Albus beamed, before gliding around her towards her papers. "She told me of you plans. Revenge seems a poor cause to fight for, Minerva, I'd hoped that Hogwarts had taught you that." His twinkling blue eyes pierced her, and she narrowed her own suspiciously.
"What would you have me fight for?"
"Honour, truth, freedom."
Her eyebrow lifted."I'm fighting for the justice I was denied, Albus."
"Then fightwithme. The Order could use someone with your capabilities." Confusion, and a little curiosity, swelled within her.
"The… the Order?" Knowing he had her right where he wanted her, Albus smiled.
~~~/~~~
A small smile flitted across her face as Minerva remembered the events that had led to her Order membership. Looking back, she could see how easily Albus had manipulated her into joining, even if it was for her own good. The order had given her a safe, stable connection with people, a goal to achieve, and far less damaging means to achieve it.
Her mother really had been her saving grace. 'I suppose that's what mothers do. They look after their children.' Her thoughts turned to her Gryffindors, and back to Albus again. It was shortly after he had inducted her into the Order that she had become the Gryffindor head of house, and with a nostalgic air she realised that perhaps that had been better for her than she had ever hoped. It had after all healed her somewhat. More importantly at the time, it had given her access to some of the top minds in the country.
~~~/~~~
"Frederick…. Are you finished?" She was practically buzzing by now with the excitement.
"Well, this isn't exactly easy, you know!"
"I am well aware." Minerva answered, bit she couldn't help herself. "Are you done now? Now?... What about now?"
The small brunette huffed and poured a vial. "Well creating a potion to reverse the effects of a memory charm is no easy thing! Let alone one suited for muggles…"A proud smile graced his lips. "But I can safely say no one has ever achieved either before! If this works…"
"No one will know." Her excited nature had vanished, giving way to a mother lioness. "Never mind the awful implications the potion could have on most muggles and their memories, but if the ministry ever got wind of this, they would take my daughter away for good." Frederick's face dropped.
"But…"
"But nothing. This is a one-time thing, designed to correct the wrong of the ministry under special circumstances." Her tone was firm. "Perhaps… In a happier time, when we can actually trust the people in charge not to abuse this…" Her resolve strengthened. "But no. Not now." Fixing him with a final glare, she spoke lowly and quickly. "Promise me. I need you to. Besides, now you are free to work on a potion for magical folk. This is surely a step forward." Leaving him with these last few words, Minerva turned and left to go and find, and get back, her daughter.
~~~/~~~
Minerva sighed. How hopelessly naïve she had been. So consumed by guilt and rage that she hadn't stopped to think. Gliding her hands among her library, she found a book entitled 'A Guide to First Year's Transfiguration' and chuckled. Pulling back the cover, to reveal many hand written notes, she settled down to remember what had gotten through to her in her lessons all those years ago, and to discover how on earth she might help Hermione.
~~~/~~~
A sharp crack rang through the air of the orphanage, but not a child or adult inside stirred. Her heart a mixture of longing and hope, Minerva bit her lip. She tried to tell herself not to get too excited – but her mind was already spinning with happiness. She didn't care how she would do it, but that night she was sure she'd get her daughter back.
Starting forward eagerly, she almost missed the figure in the shadows before she went in. Frozen, she discretely drew her wand.
"Who are you?" The figure stepped forward and again she felt her eyebrows raise, as Albus Dumbledore stood before her. His eyes were twinkling, albeit sadly.
"Hello, Minerva." His tone did nothing to encourage her; he seemed resigned, although to what remained a mystery. "I had hoped it wouldn't come to this."
"To what?" Her wand came into his vision and his eyes flitted between them.
"I am not looking for violence, Minerva. I wish to counsel you." Her eyebrow rose even higher and her nose twitched.
"Albus, I am a grown woman, I do n-"
"Even so, may I have a word?" he cut her off. She huffed, feeling almost eleven years old again, and nodded. "I fear, Minerva, that your emotions are clouding your sight." He paused, looking thoroughly distressed, and then suddenly continued more urgently. "This is not the best course of action, Minerva. I know what you are about to attempt, and should it succeed the repercussions will be dire." She stiffened. "Once you have your daughter, how in Merlin's name do you expect to protect her? You've made quite the name for yourself among death eaters. Word is bound to spread, and you can't protect her all of the time – and there is no way she will be able to protect herself."
By now Minerva's demeanour was stony. "Do you not think she deserves a better life than that? With her own kind?" Hearing her own fears voiced aloud shocked Minerva.
"But I love her."
"I know."
Tears were prickling in her eyes."I can't lose her."
"You are strong enough to do just that." For the first time since she had known him, Minerva saw tears in her colleague's eyes. Her lips quivered, and stoutly she tried to hold it together.
Her breath hitched, and Albus enveloped her in a hug.
"My dear, we are all here for you. Let us help." She couldn't help it. She was still sobbing when they landed once more in her home, after Albus apparated them both there.
~~~/~~~
In the present, Minerva felt tears threatening to prick her own eyes as she read through the pages. Tracing the lettering, she gently reflected on how so much had changed in her that night. The pain of having to leave her child behind would never leave her, although it had faded.
Once she had returned to her quarters, book in hand, Minerva held her breath. Hermione was back, reading happily in her armchair, looking peaceful. Did she really want to disturb that? 'Yes. It's time for the act to come down.' She thought.
As soon as she stepped in, Hermione looked up, a smile on her face. Seeing Minerva's rather sombre expression, this faded and was replaced almost immediately by a look of worry. The elder woman moved to sit next to her, speaking softly. "Nothing is wrong, don't worry." She smiled reassuringly. "I just wished to give you this." Hermione took the book, looked at the cover and wrinkled her nose.
"First years' transfiguration? Am I that poor a spell caster?" she asked, grinning. Laughing, Minerva told her to look inside. "Oh…" Hermione scanned a few words and hurriedly stopped reading, looking back up at the elder witch.
"I merely keep it in that book so that no one would pick it up. It's hidden in plain sight, if you will." Understanding dawned on her, and she looked questioningly at Minerva. "I thought it may help you to understand how I felt then, and how much differently I feel now."
Hermione's eyebrows practically danced on her forehead. "You trust me with this?"
Minerva shuffled, and grinned apologetically. "Yes, but not entirely; the book lets you see the entries I want you to see. I don't not trust you, I just…some things in there I do not want to share. With anyone."
Hermione nodded, understanding the woman's thoughts. "That's fine. I don't need to know everything."
"I… I just thought it may help you to understand that whatever you are holding back from me, I want to help you with it." A look of longing again appeared in the girl's eyes. "Either way, you may learn a thing or two on moving on fr-"
She was caught off guard and slightly winded by the uncharacteristic hug the younger girl suddenly sprang on her. "Thank you." Hermione told her. She squeezed a little before letting go slowly, leaving Minerva a little stunned. "I appreciate it, really."
Smiling once more, Minerva drew back and replied. "Darling, that's all I could wish for."
Leaving Hermione to read the book by herself, Minerva retired to the kitchen, where she began to cook once more, a twinkle of hope in her eyes for her protégé's future.
Thus how Minerva was turned from an angry revenge seeking mess, into the stern, somewhat less angry person we know today. :) Thank you for the lovely reviews. :)
Now, how do we think I can improve? :)