"Kahlan?" She jumped, hitting her head against the wall as she opened her eyes. "I'm sorry," he whispered, his hands laying over hers. "You've been over here for an hour."

Shrugging her shoulders, she reached to her head with a soft groan. "I must have fallen asleep "

"Kahlan-"

Forcing a smile, she pushed against the wall to help herself to her feet. "I must have been more tired than I realized."

Grabbing her arm, he kept her from walking away and to his surprise, she didn't seem angry about it. "I didn't mean to upset you, Kahlan."

"I know. Richard, I'm not upset. I was- How can I be upset when I was the one- I'm sorry I pushed. I'm not upset, I promise."

Holding her gaze, he tried to read her for more information, something he knew she wasn't going to give him, not now. "I'm sorry."

Turning toward him, she wrapped her arms around his waist and pushed her face into his shoulder. "Don't be." Moving back, she took his hand and smiled. "Come on, we should get some sleep before Cara gets tired of Emma and Doris."

"Kahlan-"

"Alright," she whispered, releasing his hand. "Go. I'm going to sleep for a little while."

Emma was sitting on her mother's lap in her office, reading some of the papers before her. Kahlan had her arms wrapped around the young girl's waist, her chin gently resting on the top of her head as she worked.

"What's this one, mommy?"

"That is the treaty we have with Amstel."

"Treaty? Isn't that where the man came from?"

"It is," she answered with a nod. "He violated many items listed there, do you see? If it is them we are to go to war with, I- Look here," she said softly, pointing to another page that was signed by six different people. "These were signed before you were born. I sat in a room with these men, discussing our terms of peace. This one here, he was the Lord at the time. He's dead now. One of these men is the ruler now and if we can figure out who it is, we may be able to stop an oncoming war."

"We?"

"This is not something I should act upon on my own. Your father and High Council will help to be sure we find the right course of action. Here, this here prevents them from entering our land for any purpose of harm to any of our people. What would you do for the violation of this particular arrangement?"

"I don't know," she replied honestly quiet. "Why-"

"The why is not important, Emma. If there was a truly just reason for wanting to harm someone... If they wanted to meet you, they could have written, asked as they came to us, but they didn't. There were many paths they could have taken, but they chose violence; they chose this path for us."

"And if we take the wrong one we will end in war?"

"It is possible, but I pray we are wise enough to foresee the wrong choice. A war would be devastating to our people; our family."

"Shouldn't daddy be here too?"

Kahlan let out a soft chuckle and tightened her hold on her daughter. "He should be here soon, he had a meeting with Cara."

Picking up one of the papers, Emma brought it close to read what she could. "Did you see this in the vision?"

"What?"

"What we have to do?"

"No," Kahlan said softly. "I only saw a small piece of a war. I'm not sure if there is anything we can do."

Turning her head, she looked up to her mother. "It can't be certain. You want a way- Circling the war?"

"I don't know if this is a prophecy we can avoid."

Touching the swell of her mother's stomach, she grinned. "Maybe you should ask Kristy to show you what to do."

"Have you gone mad?" Cara asked as she stared at the tall man before her. "You kept the letters? The ones you spent all of that time crying over-"

"She's not upset, what does it matter if I kept them?"

The blonde laughed and crossed her arms. "I'm sure. She just walked away and-"

"I asked her, Cara. She isn't upset, she told me that I had every right to be angry with her and what I wrote, it has nothing to do with us now."

"You're delusional. You had the right to put down your thoughts, but you kept them. You held onto them after all this time... She's not upset that you wrote them, she's upset that you still have them."

"She'd have told me."

Shaking her head, the blonde frowned. "You're mad. She wouldn't had told you, she can't, not when she still feels guilty for hiding the kid from you."

"What should I do?"

"Burn the letters."

"I can't do that," he whispered shamefully. "Cara, those letters, they are filled with more than anger and I meant every word. I wrote things that I can never say to her-"

"Then give them to her," the blonde said simply. "Make her throw them in the fire when she's done."

"If she reads them... The family we have, that we will have, it will all be over."

"Why?"

Closing the small distance between them, he lowered his voice. "Because I told her what I did. In those letters, I told her about the woman I was with and not the one she thinks I walked away from."

"You told her you didn't thrust into those women?" The half smile on her face faded at once. "What did you say happened?"

"I told her the truth. Part of it. I couldn't lay with them because they weren't her."

Moving past him, she took in a slow breath. "She thinks you stopped when you used your magic to turn them into her."

Richard grabbed her shoulders and pushed her against the wall in anger. "You will not say anything to her, do you hear me? I told her what I needed to to keep her! She is my family and if I lose her, I will blame you!"

"You've lost your mind. I said nothing about telling her! It's YOU who asked what you should do. Tell her or don't, you're ruined either way." Shoving his arms from her, she turned and walked away with a huff. "Your family is still waiting for you in her office."

"Emma? Where's your mother?"

Jumping up from her mother's chair, she dropped the papers she was coloring and rushed to her father. "Shh! She's over there. She's trying to find a way around the war."

"We need to wake her up. We didn't know the stress this is putting on her body."

"Mommy said she needed to find answers. If she prevents the war, we don't have to be afraid to-"

"Go out and play with Doris, I'm going to take care of this, I promise."

"Is this because she thinks you think mommy is mad at you?"

Richard dropped to his knees at once, hoping to learn some new information. "What did you- Did she say anything? What do you know?"

The young girl blinked and sat down cross legged before him. "Mommy said you think she is upset."

"Is she?"

"She is... Disappointed."

"What did she say?"

Shaking her head, she crossed her arms. "She said you'd ask... I'm not telling."

"She told you not to, didn't she?"

"No," the young girl whispered. "But she said you wouldn't talk to her about it. Now you have to." Coming to her feet, she grinned and made her way past him and out of the room, leaving Richard more than confused.

Kahlan was lying on the floor beneath one of the windows in her office. She had her hands on her stomach as though she was holding it in place. Her eyes were closed, giving the illusion she was sleeping, but he knew better as she came to her side. Her eyes moved rapidly beneath their shield, telling him that she was too deep within a vision to notice he was there. He sat down beside her head so that he could watch more carefully, hoping there wouldn't be a need for him to bring her out of the moment.

A part of him panicked that she had asked to know what he had written in the unseen letters, but no matter how he thought of it, he couldn't make himself believe it was what she did. She wasn't like him. She didn't keep secrets that big, especially from him. Cara told him to give them to her, to allow her into his mind at his most vulnerable state. It wasn't something he thought he could do. She had pushed through those months and survived, he crawled into a hole with a small image of her and destroyed himself. The anger he had felt was more than before. She had left him and he felt betrayed. It wasn't the case, of course, now he knew, but it didn't change his pervious thoughts. It couldn't.

He remembered writing them so clearly, feeling his blood boil while the hair on his body stood at attention. It was what lead him to seek comfort and yes, he couldn't lay with another woman, not until she looked like the woman he loved. It was then that it became easy. He had done things to the other woman, things he could never do Kahlan, things he was shamed of. He had gone into detail in one of his letters to her, at the time, it had been to wound her as she had him. The time of it all lasted two months, dimming the fire as he gained control and found himself able to think. The anger had never truly left until he saw the young girl enter the palace with the horror on her face. In that moment, he felt something he hadn't felt in some time. Peace.

She looked so much like the woman he loved, her intelligence beaming through her eyes, her good heart radiating toward him and as their eyes met, to be honest, he wasn't sure he could describe the emotion he felt.

Dropping his eyes to the Confessor beside him, he smiled. He couldn't imagine where he would be if he hadn't come after her and the thought of losing what he had made his skin crawl. She would find out what he wrote someday and if it was with his protest, it would make it all much worse. With a heavy sigh, he replayed the Mord'Sith's words and came to a rough decision.

She didn't move as he lifted her in his arms, but he didn't panic. The walk to their bedroom was smooth, a surprise considering how many people they passed. The sight o him carrying her should have raised attention, but no one seemed to be aware anything was different.

When she fell asleep, he was beside her, but as she opened her eyes, he was gone. Sitting up, she looked and around the room, hoping to see him, but she was alone. There was a stack of papers next to her on the bed and with a single glance, she knew exactly what they were. She grabbed them with out hesitation, instantly curious to read his thoughts, but paused as she noticed the details. They had been crumbled and cut, words scratched out and a few, written largely. He hadn't exaggerated the emotions he had and now that they were held in her hand, she wasn't sure she should read them. At least, not all of them.

'I'm angry.

You've taken someone else. Right now I can imagine him above you, within you and I want to tear him apart. I want to tear you apart. YOU were mine first, Kahlan. MINE! You shared my bed before you invited him in. You took him because you wanted to hurt me and how DARE you. After everything we've done, you allow another man between your legs! You carry his child. HIS CHILD KAHLAN.'

Before she could stop herself, she started another, holding her right hand against her lips as she read each word slowly. It was calmer, but he didn't need the full anger to hurt her with these words. Pieces of each letter stood out, whispering in her ear in a painful tone.

You're probably in bed with him right now. Why wouldn't you be? He's given you everything, but so have I. It's me you should be with. I am the man you should have loved, me. You are a fool for choosing him. You've done what your mother did to you. He will never love that child, Kahlan and it is because of you. The life you wanted so badly is yours, a desperate night in your bed saw to it and now, it's all you have. She will never forgive you for this. I will never forgive you.

She continued to read as tears snuck down her cheeks, at last understanding what he had gone through.

'How could you send that painting? I am not part of your family, Kahlan. You made sure of that. He should be there, kneeling before your feet, giving the full picture. If you wanted to hurt me, you've succeeded far more.'

'I want to hate you so badly. This would be easier. You write me and I rush to the door, needing your words, but I'm so angry. I can still feel you close and taste your kiss, it's maddening. I want to be free of you. Tonight, I will be.'

'I laid with her. I don't even know her name. It doesn't matter. Even in my desire to lose you, I need your body to respond. I watched her beneath me in your body, hearing sounds I can never hear from you. In my act to be free, I'm bound in tighter. Why have you claimed me this way?'

'Is he what you desired, can you lose yourself in him? When he fills you are you blissfully free?'

'It pains me to know that you're happy with him.'

'The night we spent together... I was going to beg you to marry me, to chose me, but you never cared about me enough to do that, did you?'

'I meant nothing to you, did I? I wanted to be yours alone, forever. You- You're never going to see this, but it makes me feel better to write it down. It might be because I know you won't read them. I'm grateful you aren't here to see me this way. The change is not something I am proud of.'

Dropping the stack of papers, Kahlan closed her eyes and leaned her back against the bed's headboard. Her mind was racing as fast as her heart, trying to either forget what she had read or piece it together. She understood why he kept the letters, they were where he had found his own mind and the feelings within. She wasn't upset at what he had wrote, it made too much sense. Taking Tony had done what she thought she wanted and he endured the pain because of her.

She imagined what the woman looked like, the one he shared his bed with. She would have been attractive, he could have nothing less and a part of her wondered if the other woman was more than herself. He used magic to make her appear to be someone else, but that didn't mean that she was faulted in looks before. Her mind drifted to imagining how they had been, the positions they shared and if it was possible he enjoyed someone else's company more.

Looking up, she brought her eyes to the window and sighed, the sun had set and from the darkness, she knew it to be late. He hadn't returned and she knew that he wouldn't. He had left her alone with his sacred thoughts, the words he never hoped to share with her and just to be sure she had enough time to process it, he would wait for her to find him.

The problem she now faced wasn't where he would be, but if she could bring herself to go. She felt betrayed, lost and unsure, all of which she had thought she put behind her the instant she found him sitting beside her in the forest. He loved her, a fact he showed more times than she could count, but everything he said to her was now replaying in her mind, questioning even the smallest word. If he cared about her, why did he keep it all a secret? Why didn't he tell her about the other woman, about the night they shared and the plans he had wanted for them? Shaking her head, she sighed, realizing that she was the reason he kept quiet.

He wasn't in Emma's room as she hoped, but the young girl made sure to receive a story from her mother before agreeing to go back to sleep. It took half an hour to get through one she knew hadn't been told.

When the small Confessor was asleep, Kahlan hurried from the room, knowing that there was only a one more place he could be.

The door wasn't locked and she didn't know why she expected it to be. Her handmaidens had taken care of the room, having quickly realized it was the couple's second room. They spent a lot of time in the guest room, finding it impossible to keep away long enough to reach their own. Her heart was racing as she entered the room, each beat seeming to make a piece of the room stand out to her. Thump, open window, the wind blowing past the thin curtains. Thump, rocking chair swaying in the breeze. Thump, his boots, clearly kicked from his feet and onto the floor. Thump, thump, thump. Her eyes see upon his face, his eyes closed in sleep, a frown on his lips.

He slept in a familiar position, one that she couldn't help but smile at. When he was alone in their bed, he was always found the same way. He'd lay on his back, his right leg covered and his left arm beneath the pillow under his head. She had teased him about it once, telling him it reminded her of a small child stuck in pattern, and it did. Their daughter had the same arrangement in her own bed, another piece of him she had been able to hold while they were apart.

She hesitated to crawl onto the bed, her mind spinning in a different direction every minute. If she laid at his side, it would mean that she forgave him, but she didn't have the right. She knew his pain had been brought on by herself and though there were things in the letters she wished him to explain, she couldn't help but see what was before her. It probably made no sense, she told herself with a half smile. Everything she thought of came back to what she knew to be true. He loved her and he was here.

Laying down beside him, she turned slightly, just enough to allow her a better view of his face, but not enough to roll completely and poke the swell of her belly into him. He jumped as her warmth flooded him, his head snapping in her direction.

Richard opened his mouth to say something, anything, in the hopes of understanding how she could have come to him, but nothing came out. Before he could grasp the thought, she kissed him and then all interest of talk was drowned. He was above her within seconds, trying to get closer without causing any discomfort to the unborn child between them. His hands moved down her sides slowly, making her, for a moment, think he was trying to see if his memory of her was correct. When his palms grazed her stomach, he pulled back for a breath and moved to sit beside her. She kept still, watching as he rubbed his hands over his face and sighed heavily.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be," she told him with a grin. "I'm the one who kissed you."

"Not for the kiss, Kahlan... I- Did you read them all?"

She nodded at first, unable to make the words leave her mouth. "Thoroughly." Shifting her body, she went back to angle herself toward him. "You didn't have to let me read them, Richard."

"I know," he whispered as his eyes found hers. "You're probably the only woman in existence who wouldn't demand to." She didn't move, a good sign considering she remained close. "Why aren't you screaming at me?"

"I don't scream," she stated with a smile. "Richard, I'm not upset with you."

"But you read the letters..."

Nodding, she tried to sit forward, difficult in the position she held, her stomach keeping her down. Richard laid down at once, making sure she could remain. "I did, but nowhere in them did I find a reason to be angry with you. I may not understand some of them, but it is not my place to. Richard, how could I be angry that felt the way that you did when it was my fault that you did? After everything we went though and what we did, I- I may have felt pained in reading a few of them, but it couldn't have come close to how you felt writing it."

He started to look away, but stopped as he realized what he was going to say next. It wasn't something he should say without giving her a chance to see the truth. "I was with another woman."

"Physically," she whispered, "but not in your heart." Taking in a breath, she closed her eyes. "Lying with someone doesn't mean that you love them."

"Kahlan-"

"You told me your secrets, it's time you heard one of mine... I chose Tony, not because he was so different than you, but because he could give me no children. I never wanted a child to come from something like that and when I read your- You said that I had done the same as my mother and I... I laid with him and I did not love him, I could not receive a child from that."

"Because you were with Tony, we are even?" he asked in confusion.

"I- I don't know how to make you understand. I do not mean to say that we are free of what we- We did what we had to, at least, what we thought we did. We will never be even, not in that."

"I'm sorry, Kahlan."

Touching her hand to his cheek, she half smiled. "Don't be."

"I wrote- How can you be alright with what you read?"

"Because I know you. Everything you said, it was true and you had every right to- There is only one thing and I know that I have no right to ask, but-"

"You can ask me anything, Kahlan."

"The painting... The one of Emma and I, did it- I didn't send that to hurt you."

Richard closed his eyes and turned his head to the ceiling. "I know, but when I saw it... It wasn't anger I felt, it was... I couldn't stop looking at it, you and her... Everything I wanted was in a picture in my hands, everything I believed to be someone else's." Looking back to her, he blinked slowly. "It was beautiful and you both looked so happy. All I could think of was- I was never going to be a part of that family."

Her eyes were wet, holding his as she tried to find the right words to say. "When I sent it to you... I was so proud of her, she- She was so much I like you and it felt like the only way I could share it with you."

"When the anger faded, I... I love that painting, Kahlan."

"I know," she whispered. "You carry it with you in the pocket of your shirt." Richard nodded, his mind still trying to understand the woman before him. "I've been thinking," she added with a smile, "maybe it's time to have another one made." She watched a series of emotions cross his face, waiting for one to settle. Before he could say anything, she brought her hands to her stomach and sighed as though it changed her mind. "Maybe we should wait a short while longer..."

He chuckled, unable to stop himself as he laid his left hand over hers. "You're beautiful, Kahlan. Maybe you should show the world-"

"No."

Her eyes were closed now when he looked to her face, but he didn't need to see them to know what she was thinking. This wasn't the first time she thought herself to be unattractive and it wouldn't be the last, not when they had plans to grow their family.

"Take off your dress," he instructed in a way that caused her eyes to open and widen.

"Excuse me?"

"Your dress, Confessor, remove it." They had played a game like this before, many months back, but he wasn't entirely sure she would allow it to go on this time. "If you don't, I'll have to- Alright," he told her as he sat up and took hold of the white strings of her dress. She held his eyes with an expression he couldn't make out. It was hot with desire, anger and confusion, which one would win, he would only hope.

Her eyes closed after her dress began to open almost afraid to see the disappointment on his face. Richard pushed his hands inside the fabric, gently massaging his fingers into her skin as they traveled. Kahlan remained still, her muscles tightening as his hands came over the swell of her stomach. She could hear his breathing quicken with his movements, but she couldn't find the strength to look at him.

He whispered how beautiful she was before his lips came to her stomach, kissing over the swell. Her back lifted as his hands slipped beneath, holding her to him. Kahlan found her fingers winding into his hair, thrilled with the sensations he sent through her body. He didn't move hesitantly, his tongue gliding over her skin as he had done so many times before when they were lost in each other. There was no way to explain how she appeared to him, the beauty that couldn't be hidden and the way he felt seeing her pregnant. His body ached with want and need at the sight of her, something she couldn't understand.

Sliding his hands around her, he reached for her breasts, drawing out a long moan that vibrated his touch. He was gone suddenly and her eyes opened, searching for him.

"Are you alright?" she asked in a panicked tone as she attempted to sit forward.

"I'm fine," he whispered in return. "Kahlan, I-" Meeting her eyes, he helped her up, giving himself an extra moment to think. "I don't know how you can allow me to do that."

"You're good at it," she teased without thought. "Richard, I'm not upset with you for laying with another woman, I promise."

"Why?" He hadn't meant to ask, but it was all he wanted to know.

"Because I know it's not she that you love." With a warm smile, she leaned toward him, her eyes searching the area as though she wanted to make sure no one heard her next set of words. "And there's that one thing you do that drives me mad-"

"What?" he asked before he could stop himself.

Her hand slid over his chest as she whispered in his ear, her mouth grazing the skin as she spoke. Richard remained still, even as her tongue snaked out and tasted the flesh, any movement and he would have her beneath him once more. She seemed to hear his thoughts, bringing her left hand to his hair to stroke as she began kissing down his neck. His body ached, close to the end and long before they begun.

"If you keep doing that-"

"You'll have to have your way with me," she completed his sentence in a seductive whisper.

It took all of his strength to hold back the words in his mind, the request he had lingering on his tongue. She would never release her magic, not with him so close, no matter how much he wanted to be hers alone. "Kahlan..."

"Hmm?"

Her lips were still traveling his skin, sneaking their way across his jaw, making it difficult for him to think. "Are you sure this is alright?"

Kahlan pulled back at once and met his eyes with a sad smile. "I'm sure." Her mind flashed back to the night he had held her down in the forest and she knew it was part of where his remained. "I trust you," she added after a moment.

"Maybe you shouldn't..."

"Because you were with another woman or because you once tried to rape me?" The words fled her lips without hesitation or pause, her eyes holding his as though it wasn't a sensitive subject, but it was.

"Both," he replied breathlessly and with tears in his eyes. He had thought about what he did more times than he could count, but even with her knowledge and claim to forgive him, it was too painful to let go. "I can't- I don't want to hurt you anymore."

"Help me please," she whispered as she pulled on his arm, trying to move closer to him. He did as she asked and held her while she moved, helping her as she settled on his lap. "Don't close your eyes," she said, taking hold of his face gently. "Richard, I-"

"You couldn't have forgiven me, Kahlan. Not after what I did, that night I- "

"You tried to share me with Tony. Yes, I remember... Very well." Her thumbs wiped across his cheeks, removing the fresh tears. "I remember that night, I even dream about it."

Richard grabbed her shoulders and leaned forward. "I never- If I could go back and change what I did, I would. Kahlan, I never should have-"

"No you shouldn't have," she agreed. "But it wasn't you, not entirely." With an unsure smile, she dropped her hands to rest on his chest. "You would never share me." She could feel his body, fully ready for her and waited for the moment he could wait no more, but it didn't come. "The point of that night that matters to me is- Richard, you stopped. You took another woman, yes, but not to hurt me. I'm not alright with what happened, it's not something that I love knowing, thinking- I know you never intended to wound me and that, that is... Richard, I forgive you."

"How?"

"Because I love you and- That night, I knew it wasn't you, not the real you and, look-"

"It's not safe."

"It's the only way you'll understand. Let me show you the night how I saw it."

He was suddenly inside her mind, seeing through her eyes as he held her down to the ground.

"Is this how he took you?" he growled in her face. "No?" he questioned as she remained silent, her words unable to flow even if she wanted them to. The only sound that left he was a gasp of relief as he removed his hand and began unlacing his pants. "How-"

*Tell him the truth, her mind screamed. Tell him why you took Tony, he will not be angry. He loves you.*

"Mistress!" Tony shrieked as he came into view.

He started to run toward them, but stopped as Kahlan turned her head just enough to shift her body for a breath. "No!" The big man froze in confusion, unsure as to what was happening when his eyes now saw what made her feel the way she did. He could feel her pain, excitement and fear, but he couldn't understand why she didn't want him to help her.

"What's the matter?" Richard asked her angrily. "He can join us. I'm sure you would enjoy-"

*If you tell him this will stop. It will stop now if you tell him the child is his. He loves you.*

"Go back to the others, Tony! Go back and do not speak of this!"

"No! Come here! You want to please your mistress don't you?" Tony stood still as Richard looked up. "The pleasures we can give her-"

*He won't share you, her mind said without pause. He will stop, he loves you. Don't fight it, he will not hurt you.*

"Tony, go now!"

Something in her voice held Richard's attention, part of him seeming to realize what was happening. She wasn't screaming at him or begging him to stop, though he doubted that it would have made a difference. She laid beneath him and the tears in her eyes were the only thing to give away the truth of her emotions. He didn't see when the other man left, but he knew they were alone and the sword hissed its anger. His mind spun with so many images, he wasn't sure which was taking place. He wanted her to say something, to speak the one thing he knew she would never say.

*Tell him it was done because you love him. Everything you did was to protect him. If he knew the child was his, he would never leave your side and it would kill him. If this saves his life, he can do anything he wants to you.*

Her heart was pounding, hitting her chest and thumping against his as he continued to lay close. The pulse vein in her neck jerked along, giving yet another piece of proof for him to witness. She remained silent, watching him with an expression that told him that she knew what he was thinking, she could see the thoughts. Her eyes closed the moment he made a decision, fearing the worst.

Richard rolled off of her and onto his back at her side, screaming in agony while his body demanded he return to her warmth.

*You know he loves you. He stopped. He loves you.*

His eyes found a way to focus back on hers, the memory fading away inbto darkness as though it was a simple thought and meant no more to her than the rocks that trailed the path through the garden. She looked at him without pain and it soaked into him. The night he claimed to be the worst he had ever known was, to his surprise and confusion, something she had put behind her. Proving herself to be a better woman than all others, she had never thought him to be a bad man, to have been angry with his mistake, even as he riped the clothes from her dress and offered o share her with another man. Even in those moments, she could see his continued love for her, believing in him to know that he would stop and endureing his torture to keep him safe. In the time he was the weakest, she saw strength and continued to love him.

Before words could be formed, he kissed her, unable to let a moment pass without it. Now he understood how she felt, how she could look at him the way that she did and without any fear. There was no one she trusted more, not because she loved him, not entirely, but because she saw things in a completely different way. The woman, half naked, before him was more incredible than he could describe.

"I'm sorry, Kahlan."

"I know and I forgive that man. The one you set loose that night, I forgive him. His intention wasn't to hurt me, it was to claim me." She smiled, surprising him with its wideness. "He didn't have to work so hard, though... I was already his."

"You're mine?"

"Yours," she answered without pause. "I am not to be shared."

He smiled, his hands sneaking inside her dress to caress her sides. "Never." Leaning into his touch, she let out a long moan, always losing herself beneath his fingertips. "I will never share you."

Words failed to leave her lips as she dropped her hands between them and began untying his pants. His mouth was so close to hers, it took all of her strength not to claim it, demand it. She knew his mind was reeling, working to make sense of everything within and if she moved too fast, he would stop her.

Richard let his lips graze hers, a quick kiss that ended before she had a chance to return. He teased her for a few moments, she knew, to keep himself from throwing her beneath him. He would never take her roughly again. For months, she had been able to tell herself that it wanted to protect the child beneath him and he did, but she knew the image in held of her in his mind of that night, crying beneath him was lingering as well. He waited for her signal to continue, to do more than caress her lips, something he was more than grateful to do. She pushed him forward as her fingers wrapped around him, pulling gently in a way only she could. His head pulled back with a moan, his own hand coming to hers to warn her not to continue. When it came to her, his body rarely responded in any other way than the desire for instant release.

Locking eyes, she grabbed her dress and pulled it from her body, for the first time in weeks, exposing herself completely to him without fear of his disappointment. The look in his eyes being more than she could stand. Moving quickly, she nearly threw herself against him, reconnecting their lips in a fury that took over all senses. Their kiss didn't last long as he moved her to lay back on the bed.

Richard pulled back, sucking in a breath of air as he ran his hands up her sides and over her breasts. His hands came to the swell of her stomach, just as his lips came to her chest, appreciating the beauty before him. Her fingers wound into his hair while her back lifted to bring her closer to the warmth of his mouth. It was slow, his every move held in place until she desperately needed more. She was more sensitive, something he loved and cursed when a single move had her clutching the sheets beneath them.

Her magic was on the edge, her body shook in passion, ready to let to, seeking freedom in the man above. He held firm as her soft whisper of his name, a warning, left her lips. The magic's release being what he sought.

"Let it go," he breathed heavily as he brought his face to hers. "Take me."

She knew why he asked what he did, though it wasn't the first time he had. He wanted to be hers, completely hers and never fear hurting her again.

"I've already taken you," she managed to reply through a heated breath. "You're mine and I'm yours."

Nudging his nose against her chin, he closed his eyes to plea to her. "Please, Kahlan..."

"I can't. Confessing you would be more painful than anything I've already endured."

Tightening his arms around her, he smiled sadly. "I'm sorry, Kahlan."

"Stop doing things you have to apologize for."

"I can't... I'm destined to hurt you."

"No you're not. Richard... I know you and I know that you don't want- It's not your intention to hurt me."

"No, but it doesn't stop me from doing it."

Stroking her fingers through his hair, Kahlan smiled. "And it doesn't stop me from loving you." Leaning forward, she kissed him slowly. "I can't confess you, Richard."

"No..."

Shaking her head, she inched closer. "I don't need to run my magic through you to know you love me."

His hands snaked down her sides, his body fighting the urge to take her at once. "I can't prove that to you."

"No? I'm afraid I can't agree." Her body bucked against his as her arm wrapped around his neck to draw him in closer. "You being here... Partly naked... It proves more than you know."

"I love you," he managed to whisper just as she snaked her hand between them.

"I know."

She was still in his arms when he awoke and completely naked for the first time in weeks. Her back was against his chest, his left arm draped over her side and held against her chest with her own arms. Instead of moving away as he usually did, he pushed his nose back into her hair until his face came to the back of her neck. Taking in a deep breath, Richard inched closer and did his best not to wake her. From the soft sunlight that came through the windows, he knew they hadn't been asleep very long, the sun having only been threatening to rise as they rolled from each other for the last time of the night. Her heart was pounding steadily against his arm, closely matching his, a surprise considering how strong the last release of her magic had been.

They had held nothing back, both clinging to the other in a passionate roll of kisses, thrusts and scratches. She filled the air with his name, gracefully flowing from her lips as she encouraged him to continue. Her body had accepted everything he gave, multiplying it by a number he couldn't guess to reach the height she held onto.

His body fought the urge to rock forward, desire continuing to flow without hesitation. He knew there was no way to describe the way she made him feel, the heat her body brought his, but when they spent the night in each others arms, he wanted to believe she felt it the same way he did.

He suddenly fought himself, his mind returning to wondering how she could allow him to be near her. She shouldn't have been able to forgive the things he did, certainly never want to, but she did and she had. She made it clear, many times, the night before that she had moved past the horrific night, making him want to as well.

Keeping his nose in her hair, he closed his eyes. "I'm sorry, Kahlan."

"Mmm, are you alright?" she asked sleepily, turning her head slightly toward him.

"I'm fine, I didn't mean to wake you."

She smiled as she rolled onto her back, holding his hand to her. "Mmm, I'm know, what's wrong?"

"I was thinking."

"About what?"

"Your forgiveness." The smile fell from her lips, sleep fading as she held his eyes. "I will never understand, not completely."

Kahlan blinked, her hand sliding over his arm. "I don't know what I can do to help you. I know that the man I saw that night, the one who attacked me, it was not you. He was not you, Richard."

"I was there..."

Pushing her hand against his chest, she pushed until she was able to lay on her side and face him completely. "You were," she agreed. "And because you were there, I was safe. I forgave everything that happened that night, but do no mistake that for a single thought that tells you I would allow it to happen again. You are looking at me as though it was something I did lightly, but it was not. Richard, I know that it replays in your mind, the same as it does mine and we cannot undo the past, we cannot change mistakes, but we can choose to see through it. That night was painful for both of us and it will never truly leave our mind, but we both know it will not happen again. As long as we live, we will have that night preying on us both, but we can't- I will not let it win. I know the man you are, he's stronger than anyone I've ever known and he loves me."

"I'm afraid you're going to wake up one night in thought of what I did and I will lose you."

"You cannot lose me, Richard. I'm yours, remember?" She gave him a small smile as her hands moved over his chest. "I think of that night, but not as often as I do our many others." Grinning, she pushed herself forward in seduction. "If you feel that man returning, warn me, I don't want to sidle up-"

"Spirits," he panted as her voice lowered to match her movements. Richard grabbed her hands and pulled them between them, holding them still as he inched his hips away from hers. He needed to think, to speak before he was consumed in passion once again. "Kahlan... Do you remember the promise you asked me to make you?"

"Of course," she whispered painfully.

"I need you to make a similar one. Kahlan, if that man, if I turn into him again, do not lay beneath me. Kah- If it happens again, you have to do more than stop me. I can't hurt you again and if you believe, for any reason, that I'm going to hurt you or - Anyone in anyway, please stop me and if I return, do not allow me to stay."

"Richard, no-"

"I need you to promise, Kahlan. I can't keep-"

"You have control now. You aren't going to hurt anyone, especially me. Richard, please... I cannot promise what you want me to. No matter what happened, I could not send you away, I- Our children, us... It will not be something I can do."

"Yes it will," he said softly, releasing her hands. She grabbed his face at once and pulled it close, swallowing the lump he felt in his own throat. "You will send me away, you- Our children will be a strong part of that decision. They cannot know me that way."

She remained still, her lips parted to bring her air as she wondered if this was how he felt when she had asked him to make a promise. It was painful and not only because of the look in his eyes, but because he was right. She would send him away to protect their children and their view of him, the world's view of him. The only thing that kept her from speaking was the imagination of her mind as she thought about losing him. Her world would end with his absence, but it wasn't something she could say. He had promised her, though she knew he didn't want to, leaving her to do one thing.

"Alright," she whispered. "I promise." Rolling onto her back, she brought her hands to her stomach and closed her eyes, hoping the young baby would give her a distraction. Dark silence filled the room around her and before she could stop herself, she was struggling to sit forward.

"Kahlan, don't," he said softly as he took hold of her left arm. "You shouldn't get up, you haven't slept-"

"There will be plenty of time for sleep. We have an early meeting with the council and if we are to stop this war, it is important that we are there."

"Kahlan-"

She turned her head toward him, meeting his worried eyes at once. "If we finish early enough, I will return to bed after our lunch with Emma."

He almost asked her to promise, but the words wouldn't leave his lips, not after what he had just asked her to do. "Will you allow me to join you?"

Kahlan smiled widely with a tilt of her head. "I hadn't planned on giving you an option." His body jumped at once in need, but she was suddenly gone.

She was standing beside the bed with her arms crossed over her chest, her small attempt to hide herself from his eyes as she tried to find the dress that needed repairing from their night of passion. He stared at her, the beauty radiating off of her and stealing his breath.

"You're beautiful," he mused, capturing her attention.

"I'm fat," she replied, watching his face carefully.

He grinned, shaking his head as he came to his knees and inched to the edge of the bed. Pulling her arms to her sides, he took in a slow breath as he studied her belly. "You've spoken with Cara too much. You are breathtaking, Kahlan..."

"You and I have a different definition of the word."

"And yours is wrong," he replied with a smile. "I don't know how you don't see it."

She fought his hold on her arms, trying to shield herself once more. "Richard-"

"I'm sorry," he whispered as he released her arms at once, fearing the moment he hurt her. "I didn't intend to make you uncomfortable."

Bringing her hands to his face, she stepped forward and held his eyes. "I know, it's alright. I may not understand how you can look at me like that, but it doesn't mean that I don't like it just a little bit."

He chuckled, his arms circling her waist. "Just a little bit?"

"Maybe a little more. I don't know, it seems nothing has changed in your eyes."

"It hasn't," he told her without pause. "I can't take my eyes off of you."

"We're going to be late to the meeting, aren't we?"

Lifting his eyebrows, Richard smiled slyly. "Spirits, I hope so."