Author's Note: This is by far the longest chapter I have written so far and, man, this chapter took me forever to write. I had finished it a while back but I kept reviewing, adding, and removing parts. I hope it was worth it…
Chapter 10
Sean was once again staring down at the revolver. It was the same scenario as before, one bullet, but this time there were four prisoners. All of them were bounded, blinded, and gagged. One was a salarian, one was a turian, one was a batarian, and the last one was a human. Sean lifted the revolver, confused. It was all the same, but everything felt different. He wasn't shaking like he had before. He stood perfectly still, completely relaxed. He wondered if this was another test.
"He can't do it," a voice said, "it'll be like before."
"Give him a chance." The smooth voice responded.
Anger began to well inside Sean as looked down the sights of the revolver. He pulled the hammer on the revolver back and aimed it. Sean slowly let out his breath and pulled the trigger. All four of the prisoners jumped at the sound, only one was hit. The turian shook as the bullet passed through his scull. The wall behind him instantly was painted blue from its blood. It slumped forward as blood began to drip at a constant rate from the bullet hole in its head. A slow clap was heard.
The brown-haired man walked in front of him, smiling. "It worked." He said slowly. He turned to a batarian beside him.
The batarian adjusted his clothes and grinned as well. "Looks like all those tests paid off. He had four choices, and he chose correctly."
"Time to get you into the business." The brown-haired man said slapping Sean on the shoulder.
Sean's eyes fluttered open. He turned to look at the clock positioned on his nightstand. It was way too early to get up. Sean turned onto his back and stared up to the ceiling, wondering about his dream. His nights had become restless since he discovered Kate had been kidnapped. He always woke up tired. Each day seemed like a chore. He wanted to talk to someone about it, but he knew no one could relate to him. He felt alone. It felt like Kate was holding him down to the world. As she grew distant from him, his own grip began to fade. He let out a long sigh as he closed his eyes once again and drifted off to sleep.
"You've become compromised." A voice said, "we don't need your services anymore." Sean's fuzzy eyes adjusted to a pistol in his face. He desperately began to struggle, but his body parts refused to move. The man then disappeared as two doctors appeared.
"Not himself. Must be some control. Need to investigate." The salarian doctor said. His eyes flashing as a bright light intensified above his head. "Need to dissect." The light slowly became blinding. Sean's body became numb. A searing pain caused Sean to yell as his body began to spasm.
"You can't leave, you can never leave!" a man yelled. A man behind Sean threw Sean's face into a bucket of water. Sean tried to fight off the man, but it was useless. He could hear his heartbeat slow. It became slower, fainter, and weaker.
Sean's eyes snapped open as he instinctively drew his knife.
"Keelah!" Tali cried jumping back.
Sean jumped at his unexpected visitor. "What, what are you doing there?" Sean stammered.
"Are you alright? I heard you yelling from the engine room." Tali said, she slowly reached forward and pushed Sean's hand down.
Relaxing Sean sheathed the knife and put it under his pillow. "Yea, I'm fine. Just a bad dream." He lied.
"Really?" Tali said, crossing her arms over her chest. "It sounded pretty bad from here."
"Yea it just scared me." Sean paused, "I'm just worried." Sean sat up and brushed the wrinkles out of his shirt.
"You want to talk about it?" Tali offered, talking a seat.
"You're starting to sound like Shepard." Sean chuckled painfully, trying to let out some of the pain he was experiencing. "I'm worried about Kate." Sean confessed. He began to pace around the room.
"Just try to relax." Tali said, "We'll find her."
"I know." Sean said, still pacing. "EDI how much longer until we reach Illium?"
"Two more hours Mr. Mason." The speakers in the room announced.
"Thanks." Sean said as he made his way back to his bed. He then removed the revolver from off his desk and stared at it. "I saw this in my dream." Sean said quietly.
"What do you mean?" Tali said, caught off guard.
"I was holding this weapon, this exact one. It even has the same scratches." Sean let out a long sigh, "I killed someone with this." Letting it fall onto his lap, Sean buried his face in his hands.
"Sean, it was just a dream." Tali said, trying to console him.
"He was innocent. I told myself I wouldn't kill someone innocent." Sean mumbled into his hands.
"But you said it was a dream." Tali said.
"But everything felt so real, the weight, the kick, everything. How would I know that if I never touched this before? It happened." Sean protested.
"Sean you're a good person." Tali said taking a seat next to Sean. "Don't let anything tell you you're not."
Sean's heart fluttered. He didn't know how to react. He was at complete loss of words. He just simply picked up the gun and placed it in Tali's hand. Sean's fingers lingered as they brushed against Tali's, but he quickly pulled away.
"I guess I just want to know. To not wonder about who I was before all this." Sean admitted, nervously massaging his hands. The room grew quiet as the pair looked in opposite directions, hiding their emotions.
"Tali, Sean, and Garrus. Report to the briefing room." Shepard's voice crackled over the ship's speaker system.
"I guess we should head up there." Tali suggested.
"Yea, lets." Sean said standing up.
The pair entered the elevator and took it up to the CIC. As it reached the Crew Deck the doors parted and Garrus entered. Sean nodded a greeting to Garrus. He responded in kind.
"You look tired." Garrus teased.
"Yea, Shepard woke me up." Sean lied.
Garrus chuckled, "Right."
Sean looked down, shaking his head. Now was not the time for jokes. The three of them exited the elevator and made their way to the briefing room.
"Shepard." Sean and Garrus said taking their places around the table.
"Alright." Shepard began. A holographic image of a base appeared. "This is where we're headed. Are you ready Sean?"
Sean nodded, leaning in.
Shepard was surprised. What looked like a dilapidated warehouse from the outside was a full-blown high tech laboratory inside. The walls were a crisp white and shone like they were polished. The lights flashed against the ground as they ran through the laboratory. Shepard gave a quick signal for the group to stop. They did so and plastered themselves against the wall.
"Were almost there." She whispered as they all crouched and made their way. She halted and quickly returned to her cover. "Tango to two o'clock." She warned.
"I got this." Sean said as he stood up and walked towards the guard. Tali and Shepard peered out from their cover and watched as Sean coolly walked up to the unaware guard.
"What are you do-" was all the guard got to say before Sean plunged his knife upwards into the guard's scull. The guard gurgled as blood began to flow from the new hole in his armor, then fell to the ground lifeless. Sean just kept walking.
"Something feels weird." Tali noted as Shepard and her caught up with Sean
"Why are there so little guards?" Shepard asked. "Garrus check in. Anything outside?"
"Nothing to see here Commander." Garrus' voice crackled back over their headsets.
They made their way into a large auditorium. Three rows of seats sat in front of a one-way window, giving them a clear view into an operating room. Sean paused in front of the glass, looking into the other room.
"There she is." Sean said. In the operating Kate sat, bound to a chair. Torture equipment sat in front of her, bloody. "We need to get down there now!" Sean said making his way to the opposite door.
"Wait!" Shepard commanded.
"For what? She needs to be rescued." Sean said, but stopping at the door.
"Tali's right. Something's feels wrong." Shepard said scanning around the operating room.
"I see you're comfortable." A voice said over the built-in speaker in the viewing room. The three jumped as they drew their weapons.
"No, you don't need to stand for me." The voice said. The brown-haired man stepped forward in the operating room. Shepard and Tali relaxed, Sean tensed every muscle in his body.
"Welcome home." He said spreading his arms.
"Home?" Sean asked, turning to the window.
"You're boy's coming for you." The man teased Kate.
"He's different now. He's not your pawn." Kate hissed back. She arched her back as a powerful jolt of electricity arced through her body. She leaned forwards in her restraints, breathing heavily.
"We'll see soon enough. See how well you fixed him." The man said, pulling a revolver from a nearby table. "So doctor, tell me how's our little patient doing?"
"I shouldn't have done this." Kate mumbled to herself.
"Ah, but you did." The man replied, smirking, "and look at the soldier you created!"
"I didn't make him that." Kate said.
"You keep telling yourself that. Remember, you were the one to place the chip in his head. All I did was program it and form him into a soldier."
"He was already a soldier. He served the Alliance, before you shot down his ship!"
"Tsk, tsk. So the doctor's got a heart now." The man teased stepping around her. "Ground, do you report?" the man said pressing a finger up to his ear. A small smile slowly spread across his face. "Looks like your boy arrived. I wonder how many of my men he'll kill." The man lifted his revolver and loaded two shots into it. "Shame you won't be around to see how much better he's gotten." He pointed the gun at Kate.
"Sean, get-" Shepard began, turning. Sean was gone. "Shit!"
Shepard and Tali sprinted down the stairs.
"Kate!" Sean shouted, his powerful voice echoing through the entire room.
A gunshot rang out, causing both Tali and Shepard to stumble. Shepard punched the door command, the door quickly opened to reveal Sean kneeling over the bleeding form of Kate, the brown-haired man lying on the ground, his nose split open. Shepard ran over to the man,
"I'm sorry Kate." Sean said
"Don't be. I brought you back to this. I'm sorry." Kate said, coughing up blood.
"Don't die on me Kate. We can get you fixed up." Sean said, his voice cracking.
"I was a monster." Kate said, "You didn't deserve this."
"No, don't say that. You didn't do anything wrong." Sean protested.
"I made you this, you didn't deserve this." Kate said weakly.
"No, I chose this life, I became this." Sean said, tears welling up in his eyes.
"You didn't have a choice, you were taught, programmed to."
"No! You had nothing to do with it! I became this monster!" Sean said desperately.
"Sean," Kate said, her life fading fast. "You were always a good person. Don't believe anything else."
A quivering smile appeared on Sean's face as tears came down from his eyes. He tightly hugged Kate's form. He refused to believe that someone as helpful as Kate would do such a thing. She was good, pure. She didn't deserve to be the one dying. It should be him in this position. He gently let Kate down as she breathed her last breath. He slowly shut her eyelids and gradually stood up. Sean's head hung low as he stood up, lost in the moment.
Tali's heart wrenched. It was hard to look at someone as composed as Sean in this position. She couldn't help but choke back a few tears as she made her way closer to Sean.
The brown-haired man sat up, coughing up some of his own blood, "I know why you came here." He taunted, "You want to know, you wanted to fill in the blanks. I can tell you it all."
Sean looked at the man, "Why couldn't you just leave me?"
"You worked with us for three years, you can never leave." The man said smiling, blood seeping into his mouth. "Face it Alex, you're a killer."
"Alex?" Sean said, his eyes growing wide.
"Starting to remember, Alex? You were a master with this gun, show me your skills again." The brown-haired man said, producing two old bullets from his jacket pocket, tossing them to Sean.
Sean easily caught both bullets. He rolled them in his hands, feeling the smooth brass surface of the shell. He reached to the ground and lifted the revolver into his hand. He removed the spent shell and loaded in the two live rounds.
"Sean don't let him get into your head." Shepard warned, her voice calm and unwavering.
"Do it." The man said, his icy voice returning, causing Sean to shiver, "Show me what you have become." Sean lifted the gun, spinning the cylinder. He waited until the rhythmic clicking stopped. It was his choice, no one else's.
"Sean…" Tali said, "You're better than this."
Sean stopped. So much was fighting inside of him. The thirst for vengeance against the morals he had taught himself. This man wasn't innocent, he deserved to die, but would killing bring him peace? You know what he did. Kill him! A voice hissed in Sean's head. Sean slowly raised the revolver, aiming at the brown-haired man's head.
"Do it!" He yelled.
Sean squeezed the trigger. Shepard was too fast for Sean to react. She stepped in and smacked Sean's hand into the air, causing the bullet to fly off course.
"Sean, you're not a murderer, don't make yourself turn into one." Shepard said.
"You're right," Sean said, breathing out a heavy sigh, "I'm not a murderer. Shepard, take this. I don't want to be tempted again." Sean said handing over the revolver, his hand shaking. He slowly placed a quivering hand on Tali's shoulder, trying to steady himself.
"You're pathetic." The man hissed. He began to stand up.
An uncontrollable rage began to boil up in Sean's veins as he turned to the brown-haired man.
Repressed memories, painful memories, everything seemed to be pointing toward to this man. Tears began to run down his face as he fought to keep his emotions in control. He killed Kate. Make him suffer! His mind yelled at him. Giving in, Sean lunged forward and began pounding on the man's body screaming, "You bastard!" Tali quickly pulled Sean away. "I'm-" Sean stammered. Tali hugged him tightly. Sean hugged her back, letting his emotions loose, crying. He had lost too much.
Hours later
The Alliance soldiers were scattered about the warehouse. Shepard was busy explaining exactly what happened inside to one of the officers. Sean stood outside, Tali by his side. He sighed painfully, letting out his emotions slowly. He felt so vulnerable, so alone. Tali gave him a quick hug, which he returned. He smiled. He needed a friend, and Tali was perfect. Tali's presence, and helpfulness really helped remind him that he wasn't alone.
His attention was drawn to the doors as angry yells emanated from behind them. Two guards appeared, dragging behind them the brown-haired man.
"I can tell you everything! No more mystery!" the brown-haired man yelled to Sean.
"I'm happy with this life." Sean said back.
"Damn it! You know you want to know! You can't leave me here! I created what you are!"
Sean winced as he tried to force the sudden surge of emotions down.
Shepard turned and saw Sean's reaction. "Shut him up." Shepard said to the Illium police officer. The officer nodded and shoved the man into the back of her cab. Shepard caught up to Sean. "You did the right thing." Shepard reassured Sean.
"My mind says that, but everything inside of me says I should have killed him." Sean said his head still hung low.
"You're a different person." Shepard said.
"Thanks for everything." Sean said. "It didn't end how I wanted, but it's over." Sean said, slowly turning towards Shepard
"It didn't end the way anyone would have wanted." Shepard said.
"We're going to find the man behind this all right?" Sean asked.
"In due time" Shepard said.
"Thank you Shepard. For picking me, for everything." Sean said extending his hand.
"Sean, you deserve everything I've given you."
"Can we put some distance to this place? I need to recover." Sean said.
"Right behind you." Shepard said entering the drop ship.