DISCLAIMER: I don't own Harry Potter.
Chapter Ten- Cold December Nights
"Damn it!" Draco shouted, kicking the bedside table.
"What is it, mate? What's wrong?" Blaise asked as he rose up from his own bed. Because of being so focused on the letter he received, Draco had forgotten that there was another person in the room.
"Nothing," Draco lied. Blaise didn't believe this however.
"You sure?" But Draco was still looking afar that he didn't hear his friend talking.
"Hey Draco? I said, are you sure you're ok?" Blaise almost shouted.
Going back to his senses, he looked at his friend, "Yea-yeah," he lied. Again. With a certain look of anger on his face, he went for the door. "Where are you going?" Blaise asked.
"Some place," Draco replied. Holding the doorknob, he pulled the door so hard that the first years at the common room looked up to him. With all the anger and frustration inside, he felt sick.
"Ginny, can you please get a hand towel in the storage room and give it to Thomas right here, " Madam Pomfrey requested.
"Yes, Madam," Ginny replied politely and went off to the storage room. The moment she was gone, someone entered the Hospital Wing.
"What can I do for you, Mr. Malfoy?" Madam Pomfrey approached.
"Um, I just need something for my headache," he said, holding his forehead frowning.
"Oh, ok. Just wait here, I'll get your medicine," the nurse said then walked towards the door where Ginny entered for the towel.
Draco looked at his back and found a chair. He sat there and waited thinking that this thing about his father's orders was making him sick. He scowled at the thought of it. But the smirk that was playing around his mouth vanished when he saw Ginny came out. He smiled as she walked towards the young boy with a pale face. He hadn't notice that there was a boy sitting over there with so much in his mind.
Draco expected Ginny to look at him since he was sitting at the open. But as she came out and went to the boy, she didn't even take a fleeting look at him. He felt that Ginny did it on purpose. But even though her eyes didn't look at his, his just looked at hers. He thought of standing up and going up to her and talk but he thought it was better if he would not…yet. When Ginny patted the young boy's shoulder and smiled, the boy stood up and exited, smiling.
Now, Draco thought and his body obeyed. Unfortunately, the moment he stood up and he caught Ginny's eyes for the first time, Madam Pomfrey came out holding a small glass of potion.
"Here you go," Madam Pomfrey said, handing Draco his medicine, "and after you drink it, you may leave, the potion will take effect in about fifteen minutes," she continued then went back inside the storage room leaving Draco and Ginny alone. When the nurse was not to be seen, Draco looked at his potion, he scowled at it and had doubts of drinking it.
"Drink it, it will help you," Ginny said in a plain tone while wiping a table beside her. The moment she spoke, he looked up quite surprised. He smiled then took a second look of the glass he washolding.
"Uh, that's disgusting," he said, raising his right arm and wiped his mouth, "what do you put in this?" he asked, lines in his forehead starting to show because he was frowning.
"It's gross but it will help you feel better," Ginny said not looking at him. When she finished wiping the table, she turned towards the storage room. Now, Draco said to himself.
"I didn't know you help here," he started hoping to start a casual conversation. The moment he spoke, she stopped and looked at him.
"There's so many things about me you don't know, Malfoy, this is just one of them," Ginny said in a cold tone.
"It's Draco, Ginny. Just Draco," he said quite irritated at the fact that she couldn't look pass his last name.
"Why would I call you that? I'm not your friend, I'm just your tutor," she replied in a matter-of-factly tone. He didn't know what to say to that. He was kind of pissed off knowing that he can't deny that. He just looked at her, his tongue playing in his mouth thinking of what he could say. But nothing came. Looking at her, she returned it. Her face was just plain, except that her eyebrows are higher than usual.
"Look Malfoy, I don't have all day," she said quite annoyed at the fact that he didn't speak. She rolled her eyes and turned back and started to walk. But Draco didn't let this pass. He walked to her and got her right arm.
"Look Ginny, that's the thing. I don't know much about you and I want to and I'm sorry. I'm sorry for saying things that hurt you. You're not just my tutor…." he said in a soft voice still holding her arm. She was surprised as she looked at her arm. He can't continue what he was trying to say because he didn't know what to tell her.
"Then what am I to you, Malfoy?" she asked in a provoking voice. She tried not to look at his eyes because whenever she did, she would always fall for them. But she can't help but stare at those grays. Draco couldn't answer this because he didn't even know what Ginny was to him. Ginny expected that he would not answer and she was right. Smirking, she got out from his grip, "That's what I thought," she said and walked away.
"Look, to prove to you that I mean what I said, meet me in front of the Head Boy and Girl's room tomorrow at five o'clock in the afternoon," he said gently. Ginny turned and looked at him in question. "Meet me there and you'll see. I hope you'll come," he said raising his right hand and dragging it back to place and left.
As he went out, Ginny looked at the door and a look of question and doubt replaced the look of anger she had.
Snow was starting to fall and Hermione smiled as she came nearer the window in the common room.
"It's snowing! Come on, Ginny. Take a look!" she said in a jolly voice. Ginny on the other hand was just looking at the fire rising, thinking. The smile on Hermione's face vanished when she saw her friend looking confused and miserable. She went up to her and sat on the hand rest of Ginny's chair.
"It's him again isn't?" Hermione said as she put her right arm around Ginny. Ginny didn't speak for a while.
"I'm really confused. I mean, we don't know each other too well but whenever I'm with him… I feel that he can see right through me and it's hard because I don't want to open up because I don't want to get hurt again," Ginny broke.
"But what do you really feel?" Hermione asked.
"I don't know. That's the thing. Sometimes I feel that I like him and I feel at ease when I'm with him. I don't know if it's my need of comfort that he gives me the reason why I slowly began to really like him," Ginny continued, "It's like whenever we're together I feel that I'm falling faster but the thing is that I often feel guilty because I see Edward in him and maybe that's the reason why I like him," she ended, her face red and tears kept falling.
"But what do you feel about Malfoy?" Hermione asked with concern.
"I don't know. I just can't avoid seeing Edward in him and it really hurts because I feel like I'm using Malfoy,"
"But is it always Edward that you see in him when you like him?" Hermione asked now rubbing Ginny's right arm. Ginny didn't speak for a while. Hermione understood the silence.
"Then why feel guilty when you like him for him?" her best friend asked gently.
"I feel guilty because I lie to some people like Ron about him. I feel guilty because what's between us, this tutoring makes me hide from people. I feel guilty because I feel that I'm using him to forget. I feel guilty because I told myself that I wouldn't let myself into this kind of situation and here I am…." Ginny said raising her head and looked at the frizzy-haired girl beside her.
"You shouldn't. You shouldn't feel guilty because you didn't force yourself into entering this. Sometimes, things that are unexpected would come and we don't have control over it. We just have to deal with it and hope things would work out. It's not your fault, Ginny. It's not," Hermione encouraged. Hearing this, Ginny smiled and hugged her friend.
"I hope it would. Thanks Hermione. I needed that," Ginny whispered in Hermione's ear still embracing her best friend.
Sitting on the couch, Draco picked the letter from the table. He looked at it with pure disgust but at the same time with confusion. He read it for the eighth time.
Draco,
You have to go home during the holiday break. You don't have any choice. You have to take your oath of loyalty to the Dark Lord. You have no choice but to follow this. The war is to begin in no time and we need more followers. Don't think of escaping or you'll regret it.
Lucius
When he finished reading it, he threw it on the floor and stood up. He thenhad his hands running through his sleek hair. He walked around the room confused about what to do. If he would go, it would mean that he would join his father's plans. But it would also mean that he couldn't spend time with Ginny. He had planned something for the two of them. The only question is that: would she go?
Weighing the pros and cons in his head, it seemed like going home would be much better than to stay. His father would approve of it and he won't be harmed and besides, he didn'thave the assurance that Ginny would go with him. But there was something in his mind that kepttelling him that it would be better to stay. That something was a voice that kept on saying that he should stay simply because of his feelings for Ginny.
Still walking, someone spoke behind him. He turned to the person and found the Head Girl standing.
"You know, she really likes you and personally, I wouldn't approve of it. But I trust her and I hope that her hopes won't be crashed," Hermione said and then walked towards the stairs going up to the Head Girl's bedroom.
She knew she had insulted him when she said that she didn't approve of their actions but it was what she thought would struck him and eventually will make him think if he wasreally serious about his feelings for Ginny. Or if he was really serious about Ginny. She expected to hear him answer back but nothing came from him. When she entered her room, she smiled.
His silence meant that he was serious about Ginny.
Hearing this, Draco wasn't able to look anywhere but to the spot where Hermione was when she spoke. Hearing her say that made Draco realize that Ginny must have told something to Hermione. What did she mean by Ginny's hopes crashing? Draco thought. That statement made him sit down and think if he was really into Ginny.
"Well, I guess you'll just have to wait father," he whispered, looking at the letter on the floor. He then stood up and went to his room.
Ginny decided to go to bed early. But lying there looking at the starless sky, she can't sleep thinking about whether to believe Malfoy or not. Molly wrote to her requesting that she and Ron go home to spend the holidays with them. Ginny decided that as usual, she would but with Malfoy at thought now, she seemed to have second thoughts of going home.
If I go home, it would mean that I would not spend my day tomorrow with Draco. If I don't go home, then it would mean that I would spend my time with him, Ginny thought. She sighed in frustration. She needed to have a decision by tomorrow morning because the train would leave tomorrow before lunch.
Ginny thought that if she had decided to go back to the Burrow, it would mean that she would not give Draco the chance he asked for. I never thought that deciding whether to go back home or not would be this hard, Ginny thought. She took a deep breath, hugged her pillow and closed her eyes.
Unusual for Ginny, she woke up at the crack of dawn. She opened her eyes and the things that happened that night suddenly flashed in her head. She rose up and just sat on her bed. She looked around and saw that all of her roommates were still deep in slumber. Thinking that maybe she could get something to eat, she rose up, put her robe on and went out for the kitchens.
Walking down the stairs, she was just looking at the stone floor. Suddenly, she looked up when she felt that someone was walking towards her. And for sure, someone was. It was Draco. Both stopped walking and just looked at the other. Ginny, as always when in awkward situations like this, avoided his eyes. But his grays just looked at her and this made her look at him.
"Hi," he said feeling nervous. Still, she hadn't spoken. Feeling really uncomfortable, he bit his lip and just looked at the apple he was holding.
"Well, I better go," he said not looking at her and walked towards her way where the stairs were. When he walked passed her, she closed her eyes feeling stupid that she hadn't said anything. But most of all, she closed her eyes feeling frustrated.
"Hey Ginny, are you coming? You received mom's letter, didn't you?" Ron asked, walking down the stairs from their dormitories holding two big cases.
Ginny who was sitting in front of the fireplace looked at him and smiled.
A/N: well, what do you think? would she go or would she stay? thank you for reading and i hope you'll review! read on and find out:)