This chapter makes me sad and I'm an awful person for writing it...
After a few weeks, Fin and Munch got used to the stares and the whispers and the mocking comments. Not every response was negative, however, there were several times when the couple would get a smile or a whistle or some compliment. But the majority of the feedback was negative, which only fed the fire that was Munch perceiving everything as a threat.
Fin didn't usually mind when Munch got defensive on his behalf, because usually it was against some asshole on the street that actually meant him harm. Fin knew that there would come a time when Munch's defensiveness would transcend into their working life, and he knew that he would react badly to it. He dreaded the day that he knew was inevitable, which came too soon.
"I don't need your protection, John!" Fin barked as he and Munch exited the interrogation room.
"Oh," Munch retaliated, "I'm sorry, I wasn't aware that my caring annoyed you so much!"
"You can't shield me from everything," Fin scowled, "I know you want to protect me, but I'm a man! And I'm a cop! I can handle myself around perps!"
"Well you certainly handled yourself when—" John caught himself, he knew what he had been about to say, and he knew Fin did too.
"When what, John?!" Fin yelled, anger flaring, "When I got raped? I wasn't aware that was my fault! Please tell me what I could have done to prevent that situation!"
"I didn't mean…" Munch frowned, they were now at their desks and he was aware that Olivia and Elliot were staring.
"Then tell me what you meant!" Fin growled and, without thinking, shoved Munch, "You don't think I'm enough of a man to defend myself? I don't need you protecting me against the world, John!"
"Well, fine!" Munch yelled, shoving back, "I guess you don't need me anymore!"
"I guess I don't!" Fin shoved harder, making Munch stumble backwards.
"Hey," Cragen yelled, getting in between the two men, "What the hell are you two doing?"
"Nothing," Munch glared at Fin.
"Well, take it out of my precinct," Cragen frowned, "both of you go home."
"Fine," Munch pushed himself past Fin, "Just wait until you get attacked again," Munch yelled as he walked away, "we'll see whether or not you want my protection!"
"Asshole!" Fin yelled, chucking a coffee mug at Munch, which shattered on the wall beside his head
Fin didn't want to go home, not after what Munch had said, so he stayed in the crib until everyone else began to leave.
Once the precinct fell into silence, he headed into the locker room and was glad to see that it was empty. He hated showering when there were other officers there, now, since most of them glared if he made eye contact.
Fin welcomed the hot water that relaxed his tense muscles as he stood under its steady stream. He didn't want to think about Munch, or what Munch had said. He knew he hadn't meant it, but that didn't change the fact that he had said it.
"Dammit," Fin cursed, he knew he had reacted poorly to the situation, but he hadn't expected Munch to retaliate so violently. The last thing Fin wanted was to be on bad terms with Munch, because Munch was the only thing that made his life worth living. He loved waking up in the morning with the too-awake man in his arms and spending his days full of secret glances and soft touches from under their desks, and he didn't want that to go away. He loved Munch, he knew that, and he knew that he was going to have to fix this however he could.
Fin smiled slightly, deciding that he was going to go home and wrap his arms around Munch and tell him he was sorry. Then, Munch would tell him that he shouldn't be sorry and that it was all his fault and that he loved him and always would. A small chuckle bubbled from Fin's chest as he imagined Munch pulling him into a passionate kiss, begging for forgiveness.
Fin was about to finish his shower when saw something out of the corner of his eye, and it sent a wave of cold dread through his very core.
Standing at the entrance to the shower were some ten men, all naked except for the masks that covered their faces. Fin watched in horror as they advanced. He pleaded to whatever God would listen that his feet would move, that his voice would pour from his lips, but he was frozen, forced to watch helplessly.
"What's the matter?" One of the men sneered, "shouldn't you be used to this by now?" A whimper escaped Fin's lips as he felt himself being shoved against the shower wall. "You like this, don't you, you fucking whore?" The man growled in his ear, emphasizing his words with a sharp tug at Fin's hair.
"Get off-" Fin choked, trying to keep emotion out of his voice.
"Why?" Another man asked, taking hold of Fin's hair and pushing him on his knees, "Are we not good enough for you?"
"I feel insulted," One man said in a mock hurt voice, "I mean, if a low-life piece of firewood is good enough for him, what does that say about us?"
"We should teach him a lesson," Another spat, getting in front of Fin, his semi-hard member inches from Fin's face.
"Fuck you-" Fin growled, turning his face from the man before him.
"Exactly what I was thinking!" The first man laughed sadistically before pulling Fin to his feet and pressing him once more against the wall, this time forcing Fin's legs apart so he could prod at Fin's entrance. "Look at how loose he is," the man sneered, "you fucking slut."
It was all Fin could do not to scream as the man shoved himself inside him without warning, causing a sharp pain to shoot up his spine.
"You like that don't you?" Another man snarled, yanking at Fin's hair so he was forced to look back at the men through tear brimmed eyes.
"Aw," one of the men cooed teasingly, "we made him cry."
"Not such a big, bad Narc anymore, are you?" The man inside him mocked, continuing his painful thrusts.
"Go to hell," Fin tried to keep the sob out of his voice.
"Hey, what the fuck?!"
Fin had never been more happy to hear the voice of Elliot Stabler in his life.
"Holy shit," Elliot breathed, shocked as he took in the full scene before him, "Fin."
It only took a second for the men to lunge at the unwelcomed guest, but the ever cautious Elliot was quick to pull his gun, "if even one of you move, I will kill you on the spot," Elliot barked, fire blazing in his eyes.
It didn't take long for Elliot to have all the men handcuffed or zip tied or restrained in any other way he could find. As soon as he finished, he rushed over to where Fin was, turning off the still running water and checking the man for any immediate injuries.
"You alright?" Elliot asked, clearly not sure as to how to handle the situation further.
"Do I look alright?" Fin groaned, turning his face away from the other detective. He didn't want Elliot to see the tears still streaming down his face.
It had been nearly an hour since the men had appeared and now that it was finally over, Fin was tired and sore and hurt, his wet hair clung to his face and he wished he could just sink into the shower drain and not have to deal with what was to come.
"Hey, look at me," Elliot sighed, and with an unusual display of carefulness, he hooked a finger under Fin's chin to force him to look up, "are you alright?"
"I'm fine," Fin sighed, uncomfortably as he lay on the tile floor, cold and wet and broken, "I'm starting to get used to it."
"I'll get you a towel," Elliot said in an apologetic kind of way. It wasn't until he exited the showers that he flipped open his phone and dialed the number of the man he suddenly felt the urge to strangle.
"This is Munch."
"Munch, get your ass down here. Now." Elliot growled into the receiver, venom dripping from his voice.
"Why, what happened?" Munch asked, panic in his voice.
"Your wish came true, asshole." Elliot snarled before clicking the phone shut, grabbing a towel, and returning to the shivering Fin.
"This sucks, man," Fin sighed as he wrapped the towel around his waist, "this really sucks."
"At least it won't be a long trial," Elliot scratched the back of his head, "I mean, we don't have to track them down or anything."
"Yeah, great," Fin scowled at the blood pooling around the drain, feeling the sting of its source as he shifted on the floor.
"Fuck, man," Elliot's eyes widened as he followed Fin's line of sight towards the blood he hadn't noticed before, "you are hurt, don't move, I'm calling a bus."
"Don't call a bus," Fin frowned, "I don't need a bus, I'll be fine."
"Just shut up and stop squirming," Elliot smiled sadly, "I'm taking care of you, man."