Hey guys, LONG author's note ahead. If you want just skip it.
First off: thanks for all the kind reviews and everything (that will always be a must in my initial AN)
Second: this chapter is long and it's a turning point in the story because it sets off to the second half of the story – I'm a bit worried about this because a lot of you seem to loving the humor in this, and I feel like I should tell you that this second half, even if it has its funny moments here and there, is much more "angsty" (though I don't think it's really hardcore angst) than the first part, because this where both of them will stop avoiding thinking about things and really start dealing with feelings and decisions they have to make…
I hope this isn't a bad thing. This chapter makes the transition – so you can get a feel of how I write my "angst". PLEASE tell me if there's anything you think I need to do about it to make it better if you're not feeling it. I don't mean about the actual plotline because that I can't really change that much… I mean about how I write – if it's too light, too heavy, too philosophical, too preachy… I dunno – just let me know if you're connecting to it or not, because that's my goal with it, it's getting you to connect and understand their feelings and their motivations.
Ok?
Sorry for the long A.N.. I'm just a tad bit worried, that's all. Even if I do like how it came out, I'm not sure how you'll feel about it.
'k… I think I can stop rambling now and just let you get into it shall I?
xXxXx
Blaine laid awake in his bed, staring at the white envelope resting against his bedside lamp. It had 'Kurt' written on it in simple, neat handwriting. He glanced towards the alarm clock. The bright red numbers read 23:58. Two more minutes and it would be the day. The day that Blaine would tell Kurt he loved him. He'd give him the letter and that would be it. That would be the day.
A million scenarios had made their way into Blaine's mind, his imagination running wild. For each glorious one there was also a disastrous version that made his stomach disappear and his heart clench.
They would all leave him questioning everything about how he should do it. Should he give it in person or leave it in his bag and wait for Kurt to find it once he got home? No, he should definitely give him in person. Should he have him read it there or tell him to read it later when Blaine wasn't there? He should probably have him read it in the moment and brave through it. Should he give it right when Kurt got there or at the end of the night? Neither – he wanted Kurt to see his special project first and that would only be possible when everyone was there; but he also didn't want to risk either of them being too drunk to do that moment justice. So, whenever it felt right. That's when Blaine would do it.
There was a sense of expectation running throughout his whole body. Make it or break it.
24:00
xXxXx
"Happy Birthday!" David pulled Kurt into a horribly tight hug the minute Blaine's front door was open.
"Thanks!" he gasped trying to gather himself and take in his surroundings. It was weird being at Blaine's and not seeing any expensive jars on fancy furniture and impressive paintings hanging on the walls.
"Come on!" David grabbed his wrist starting to pull him upstairs "We were having a hot dog eating contest!"
"Charming…" Kurt muttered as he let himself be pulled into Blaine's bedroom, where he found Blaine and Wes sitting by an empty dirty dishes, clutching their stomachs, grease stains all over, their faces absolutely disgraceful "Ew."
"Hey!" Wes beamed.
"HAPPY BIRTHDAY!" Blaine shouted jumping to his feet, clumsily making his way to hug Kurt, followed suit by Wes.
"Awww, group hug!" David grinned before joining.
"Thanks!" Kurt chuckled "but you can let go now… I'd like a chance to breath and maybe live to have another birthday."
The three boys pulled away with smiles and Wes immediately shouted "GIFTS!" before grabbing Kurt by the shoulders and pushing him out of the room, back downstairs.
"Calm down!" Kurt scowled, trying not to smile. Wes completely ignored this and continued to push him towards the nearly empty living room, Blaine and David in tow. There were three small bags on the couch. Wes nearly threw himself towards them.
"He gets excited about gifts." Blaine whispered beside Kurt with a small shrug and an amused smile, like a parent excusing his overly excited son.
Kurt accepted the bag from a beaming Wes and opened it. It was a beautiful leather bound notebook "Ohh, this is beautiful, Wes, thank you so much!" he hugged him quickly, as David came up to him holding a smaller bag and smiling as well. Kurt giggled as he discovered a beautiful pen with Kurt Hummel, a Great Warbler. He pulled David into a hug as well. They had clearly coordinated their presents. "Can't you two do anything without each other?" he smirked towards the two beaming boys.
Blaine stood holding out his own small bag with a wide grin and eyes glistening with excitement. Kurt braced himself, knowing Blaine had a tendency to go overboard with gifts. Which is why, when he opened the bag, he had his most Oscar worthy moment.
"Easy A!" he gasped holding out the DVD case "Awesome, I love the movie!" his voice was slightly high pitched, but he thought it could easily pass for excitement. "thank you so much, Blaine!" Kurt turned to Blaine and made for a hug but the other boy burst out laughing before he could.
"Seriously, Kurt?" he panted through chuckles "You think I'd give you a movie?"
Kurt blushed and shrugged as Blaine went to get a wrapped gift that Kurt hadn't noticed before – it had been partially hidden behind the bags. "This is your gift." He smiled fondly.
Kurt took it warily and unwrapped carefully. He found a copy of Patti Lupone: A Memoir. This time he decided to be honest "Blaine… I love this book, and you know that, but you also know I already have it."
Blaine chuckled softly "Open it on the first page."
When Kurt did his eyes caught something he could never have expected. There it was, just like he'd seen a thousand times on pictures that he could never actually own, but only admire on the internet. Patti Lupone's signature, her beautiful, mesmerizing signature. And you could tell it was real too! The ink was blue and it was just so real.
"A signed copy?" he gasped. Blaine nodded with a soft smile. "Oh my God! You mean, like, she actually touched… and held this?" he lunged at Blaine, crushing him in an excited hug as all sorts of giddy, childish and terribly high pitched noises came out of his thrilled self "Oh my God! Thank you so much! SO much!"
"You're welcome!" Blaine laughed, his voice still muffled against Kurt's shoulder.
"Seriously! Thank you! I love y-it!" HOLY SWEET MOTHER OF….did anyone notice that?
"Well, yeah, I found it on-line just two months ago, and thought it'd be a good idea, just in case." He smirked.
"You had this for two months and didn't even tell me?"
"It was your birthday present! I couldn't tell you!"
"Yes you could! You could have given it in advance!"
"Kurt, are you sure this is your seventeenth birthday?" he teased.
Kurt rolled his eyes before breaking back into a grin the moment they landed on the book. "Oh my… this is so amazing!" he gasped once more, holding the book close to his chest like a treasure.
xXxXxX
The four boys were soon joined by Finn, Mercedes and Rachel, who also offered to help set things up, even though, truth be told, there really wasn't that much setting up to do. In the end they just decided to sit and watch whatever movie was on until people started arriving. They soon decided it was best to order some form of dinner or the boys would eat all the snacks that were meant for the actual party.
More people started arriving shortly after they'd played rock/paper/scissors to see who would get the last slice of pizza. A few warblers first, punctual as was expected, and then the whole New Directions gang arrived, including Puck, loaded with all sorts of beverages in quantities that made Blaine start to slightly regret his decision to offer his house for the party.
The drinking had started (Blaine decided that was one night he needed to stay sober) and people were starting to go a little wild. Brittany was, as Blaine remembered, starting to lose clothing items; Santana was alternating between admiring Brittany and trying to maintain her rep by flirting with pretty much any warbler she could find; Puck had started a drinking competition that involved chronometers and betting and Blaine was sure he was not going to go near that; Finn and Rachel were probably the most hilariously ridiculous thing in that room as they attempted to dance and failed miserably…
Try picturing a giant dancing with a midget (ok so maybe Blaine wasn't the best person to be calling Rachel a midget, but that's beside the point). Now, make sure that your giant his incredibly gangly and awkward and can't really dance to begin with and add alcohol to the mix. On the other hand, you have the really skinny midget flailing her arms around wildly and without any real sense of rhythm or even what could be described as a dance move, because she was indeed, inebriated to the point of no return.
The result, if your imagination served you right, should be a complete and utter mess of alcoholic coordination – somewhere along the lines of what Frankenstein would look like while dancing with Minnie on a sugar high.
Blaine snorted as Rachel swatted Finn's … privates in one of her brilliant moves and Finn doubled over in pain. He laughed as he crouched down next to Finn with a smile.
"You ok, buddy?"
"No… children." He strained out, his face bright red as he took Blaine's help to get up. Rachel stood looking horrified.
"You heard him Rachel – better start looking at adoption agencies or sperm donors." Blaine patted her shoulder, but she barely noticed it as she ran to Finn blurting apology after apology.
He laughed, shook his head and walked away from the sad, sad spectacle. Then Blaine noticed Kurt slipping out of the living room, running up the stairs. He almost made to follow him but caught sight of him holding his iPhone to his ear and answering with a cheerful "Hey Drew!"
That had to mean Drew was almost there. Should Blaine just go for it now? Before he could even think about following Kurt upstairs a pair of arms grabbed him as Mercedes hugged him "Best party!" she beamed.
He pulled back slightly from the giggling girl and smiled "Thanks."
"Hey, when's the thingy?"
"Thingy?"
"Yeah… the secret project…?" she leaned forward and whispered, though why she would feel the need to whisper or use cryptic words was beyond Blaine. Also, her breath made Blaine grimace. Vodka… Guhhh.
"Oh… Huh, maybe we should just… Kurt's on the phone with Drew, he'll probably be here any minute. Let's just wait for him."
"Wait for who?" Kurt's voice asked from behind Blaine as he descended the last few steps of the staircase.
"Drew." Blaine said immediately "Before we start handing out more drinks… the guy'll get here and have nothing to drink, at the rate things are going."
"Oh, he's two minutes away… literally. Just gave him directions." Kurt explained raising his iPhone as illustration.
"KURT!" Mercedes beamed, pulling her friend into a bone crushing hug which knocked the wind out of him "My boo! I love you!"
"I love you too." He gasped, trying to recover from the assault. Blaine smiled as their eyes met for a few seconds "But maybe you should take it easy on the drinks, honey."
Mercedes giggled as she turned on the spot and returned to the roaring living room. Blaine and Kurt watched her go in silence for a bit before Kurt turned to Blaine "The party's going great, but I honestly hope you won't get into trouble."
"No trouble at all. Neighbors have been paid off." Blaine nodded confidently, to which Kurt raised an eyebrow "I'm kidding! But the neighbors here have known me my whole life and I've practically done favors for all of them, from babysitting to gardening or wall painting, so I think they'll let one little party slide by…"
"Little… this is the first hour and a half!" Kurt frowned slightly as, just for good punctuation, Puck finished an entire can of beer in one go to roaring applause.
"So maybe I'll have to do a little begging, some apologizing… I'll probably bake a remorseful cake tomorrow." Blaine reasoned, folding his arms and leaning against the door frame as he observed the wild spectacle in front of him.
The door bell rang, though it was barely perceivable over the loud noise, and Blaine's heart sank just the tiniest bit when he saw Kurt's face lighting up as he nearly ran to the door. He pulled it open.
"Hey! Sorry I'm late!" Drew smiled, before pulling Kurt into a deep, lingering kiss. Blaine tightened his arms around himself, suddenly feeling a lot less together. "Happy birthday…" the blond boy smiled as he pulled away, handing Kurt a wrapped box. Blaine was 89% sure he just knew what it was, which is why he didn't feel the need to stay there and watch anymore.
It was time for the project he'd slaved over for half a week and he'd be damned if Drew being there would make it any less special. So, he refused to give into the depression that threatened to envelop him and resumed to going to the living room and setting things up. He turned on the TV and his DVD player, hooked up the USB pen, and turned off the music.
Immediately the room went silent for a few seconds before a horde of voices started protesting over the lack of music. He climbed onto the coffee table and proceeded to ask everyone to quiet down. After a lot of persuasion and just as Kurt and Drew entered the living room, smiling, hands linked, and Kurt sporting a beautiful brand new Marc Jacobs scarf that matched his eyes perfectly, they finally silenced their protests.
"Hey everyone! On behalf of Kurt, thanks for coming. On behalf of myself, I'd appreciate it if the house was still standing in the morning. Now, off to more important things. Kurt, some people and I thought we should do a little something for you… to tell you how special we think you are, and how important it is that you're in our lives… so… let's maybe just watch it." He smiled, hoping off the table and clicking play, as a bemused Kurt started to make his way to the couch, slowly and carefully sitting down.
On the TV screen appeared a Blaine, in the middle of a green field. He was holding a big sign that read simply "HI" as he grinned and waved. There was absolutely no sound whatsoever.
Kurt glanced at Blaine with a small smile and a frown but Blaine shook his head and pointed towards the TV screen.
Mercedes walked up to Blaine and without even looking at the camera took the sign out of his hand to reveal another "WE HAVE SOMETHING TO TELL YOU"
Rachel skipped her way towards them and removed this one too "BUT WE'RE MORE USED TO SINGING" the three of them shrugged, as Finn, Wes, David and, surprisingly, Burt, joined them.
"SO…."
"WE THOUGHT WE'D DO BOTH."
Just then their soft voices started singing and Blaine forced his eyes to stay on the screen.
Made a wrong turn, once or twice.
LIFE'S NOT PERFECT.
Dug my way out, blood and fire.
SOME DAYS ARE HARD
Bad decisions, that's alright.
WE SCREW UP
Welcome to my silly life.
WE FEEL LIKE WE'RE STUPID
Mistreated, misplaced, misunderstood.
USELESS
Miss 'No way, it's all good', it didn't slow me down.
COWARDS
Mistaken, always second guessing, underestimated.
AND WEAK
Look, I'm still around.
BUT WHEN YOU'RE HAVING ONE OF THOSE DAYS
Pretty, pretty please, don't you ever, ever feel
YOU SHOULD KNOW WE THINK YOU'RE
Like you're less than fuckin' PERFECT.
YOU REALLY ARE
Pretty, pretty please, if you ever, ever feel like you're nothing,
AMAZING, TALENTED, BEAUTIFUL AND SO MUCH MORE
You're fuckin' perfect to me
JUST PERFECT.
You're so mean when you talk about yourself; you were wrong.
WE KNOW YOU
Change the voices in your head; make them like you instead.
AND WE'RE HERE
So complicated, look happy, you'll make it
ALWAYS
Filled with so much hatred, such a tired game.
AND FOREVER
It's enough; I've done all I can think of.
WHENEVER YOU NEED US
Chased down all my demons, I've seen you do the same.
WE'LL TRY OUR BEST
Woah ohh, pretty, pretty please, don't you ever, ever feel
TO SHOW YOU HOW
Like you're less than fuckin' PERFECT.
WE THINK YOU ARE
Pretty, pretty please, if you ever, ever feel like you're nothing,
DON'T CHANGE A THING
You're fuckin' perfect to me.
YOU'RE JUST PERFECT.
The whole world's scared so I swallow the fear.
DON'T YOU FORGET THAT
The only thing I should be drinking is an ice cold beer.
AND DON'T YOU EVER BELITTLE YOURSELF
So cool in line, and we try try try, but we try too hard and it's a waste of my time.
BECAUSE FOR EVERY BAD DAY
Done looking for the critics, cause they're everywhere.
FOR EVERY BAD MOMENT
They don't like my jeans; they don't get my hair.
THERE ARE HUNDREDS AND THOUSANDS MORE
Exchange ourselves, and we do it all the time.
THAT ARE AMAZING AND ABSOLUTELY BRILLIANT
Why do we do that? Why do I do that?
THOSE ARE THE ONES WORTH REMEMBERING
Why do I do that?
THOSE ARE THE ONES WORTH KEEPING
Yeah, oh, oh baby, pretty baby
WE'RE HERE FOR BOTH KINDS
Pretty, pretty please, don't you ever, ever feel
KEEP THAT IN MIND.
Like you're less than fuckin' perfect.
OH!
Pretty,pretty please, if you ever, ever feel
AND ONE LAT THING…
Like you're nothing, you're fuckin' perfect to me, yeahhh.
WE
You're perfect, you're perfect
LOVE
Ohh pretty, pretty please, if you ever, ever feel
YOU
Like you're nothin' you're fuckin' perfect to me.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY
The group waved as Blaine dropped the last sign with a smile and a wave and the image went black.
Blaine had avoided looking at Kurt throughout the whole video. He'd stared intently at his work, feeling incredibly proud at how it turned out – the image, the montage, changing from person to person, and background to background (each person had picked a place they thought was particularly important in their relationship with Kurt for their solo shots) so it would be dynamic and interesting; and the sound too, as they'd manage to actually have a solid recording of the song and they sounded pretty damned good with just the right amount of solos that it wouldn't take away the fact that it was a group project. Yes, Blaine had had that to busy himself with, but now he just had to look.
Kurt was still staring at the TV, completely unaware that every eye on the room had turned to him. Blaine watched expectantly as the boy finally drew a shaky breath and broke into a tearful smile, seeking out the faces he'd just seen on the screen. He found Rachel first and the moment he caught sight of her he jumped off the couch to hug her, muttering something Blaine couldn't quite make out but sounded something like "You're annoying but I do love you too", she giggled and wiped away a few tears of her own. Then he lounged at Mercedes who was also crying and they exchanged I love you, boo's. Finn didn't even wait for Kurt to find him as he yanked his stepbrother off Mercedes' embrace and picked him off the ground with his bear hug "Happy birthday little bro!"
"Put me down Finn!" Kurt scowled, though it wasn't very effective because he was still smiling broadly, tears streaming down his cheeks "Thanks!" he muttered as his brother complied "And thank you for the video too…" he hugged Finn a little more calmly now, his feet steady.
Finn just smiled and shrugged, before turning to Blaine "It came out awesome, dude, really nice work!"
Blaine smiled and winked shortly before he was caught off guard by a pair of arms wrapping themselves around him. Kurt's voice was low and barely as whisper as said "Thank you… so much."
"Happy birthday, Kurt." Blaine muttered into Kurt's neck, wishing he could just say, 'I love you' instead, but now was not the time – not in a crowded room, filled with drunk people and a certain blond boy. But maybe it was around time he got that letter…
"It was perfect… It must've been so much trouble!" Kurt pulled back.
"It was…" Blaine admitted "But it's worth if it can make you cry like a little girl." He teased.
Kurt pretended to take offense as he turned away, holding his head high and wiping the tears away "Wes and David, came here you guys!"
As Blaine watched Kurt hug his two friends he decided that it was definitely time to go through with it. No time like the present.
With one last glance at him Blaine turned and sprinted up his stairs to his bedroom, his heart drumming wildly as anticipation rushed through his veins – he could barely contain a smile. No matter the outcome he would have just gone through with it – at least he would have tried. There was impending relief filling his heart as he knew he was about to let go of a million thoughts and emotions. He swiftly picked it up from his desk and turned to go back but found Drew coming inside the bedroom and closing the door behind him.
"Oh, hey…" Blaine tried to sound casual, though he probably failed completely.
"Tell me something Blaine, what is Kurt to you?" the tall boy asked, shoving his hands into his pockets and leaning against the closed door, managing to look both terribly threatening and nonchalant. Blaine's relief fell right off of his body.
"My best friend." Blaine muttered immediately.
Drew nodded silently for a few moments before cocking his head and speaking again, still keeping his tone relaxed and easy going "You know what he is to me? My boyfriend."
"Yeah, I know that…" Blaine said, almost through gritted teeth, trying to conceal the anger that statement had awoken in him.
"And I actually really like it that way." He added "So… you and I… we should have a little talk. Because I have a feeling you want to be more than his best friend."
Blaine remained silent. He didn't want to confirm it, because it wasn't fair that he should tell Drew before he told Kurt. But he couldn't exactly just deny it, especially when he held a love letter in his hand addressed to Kurt.
"Thought so." Drew's voice was hard and a little threatening "Just back off, ok?"
"What?"
"I get it, you're best friends, and I can't stop you from spending a lot of time together and all that shit. But stop it with the ridiculous gifts, the big gestures – the freaking videos! Stop with that shit. I'm the boyfriend, and that's not changing any time soon!"
"How can you be so sure?"
"Because you don't have the guts to go downstairs and tell Kurt he has to chose between me and you; because you've been head over heels for him for months now and done absolutely nothing about it, when you could have had him in the palm of your hand just like that; because you're so scared about your precious little friendship to risk anything…" he took a step closer to Blaine and almost smiled "and mostly, because you know you don't really deserve him. If you did, you'd have noticed him the moment you met him. Now it's too late."
Blaine felt his grip around the letter tighten and it crumpled in his hand. He wanted to snap back and tell him he was about to do just that, but his voice was nowhere to be found as he just stood there staring right back at Drew, his body starting to shake uncontrollably.
"Look, Blaine, I really like Kurt, and he really likes me too. We have an amazing time together. Let it go. Move on. He has."
Drew shot him one last glance before leaving the room, closing the door behind him and leaving Blaine standing there, alone, a crumpled letter in his shaking hand.
Move on. He Has.
xXxXxX
"Cedes, sweetie, thanks for telling Drew what to get me, it's perfect!" Kurt giggled, running his fingertips through the delicate fabric.
"Uh, what are you talking about?"
"The scarf!" Kurt frowned holding it up, from his neck "wasn't it you who told him to get me this?"
"No." a voice said from behind Kurt and he turned to find his boyfriend smiling happily. Drew captured Kurt's lips in his before pulling back "Actually it was my cousin." He admitted with a coy smile.
"Oh… David…" Kurt frowned, slightly confused "Ok…" Maybe he'd overheard Kurt gushing about it at some point. Kurt was impressed. Maybe David's not as unobservant as everyone makes him out to be. On the other hand, why am I even thinking about David when my hot boyfriend's this close to me?
Kurt wrapped his arms around Drew and smiled, pulling him closer "Dance with me?"
"If by dance you mean kiss, you bet." He chuckled, dipping his head to reconnect their lips. Kurt ignored Mercedes' giggles and gagging noises as she walked away, turning his full attention to the amazing kiss he was sharing with Drew.
"Mmmm…" he sighed once they pulled away for air.
"You're amazing." Drew smiled, before giving him another quick peck "I'm gonna go get us some drinks, ok?"
"Yeah…"
"When I come back, you and I, we are going to dance this house down!" he smiled, and Kurt laughed, before heading away. Kurt watched after him in silence until he felt someone standing next to him. He found Blaine also looking after Drew.
"Things with Drew… they're good?" Blaine asked without averting his eyes from where Drew had already disappeared between the mess of people.
"Yeah… amazing, actually. He's perfect." Kurt sighed, hugging himself with a smile he knew was ridiculously sappy.
"That's good, I guess." Blaine sighed.
"Yeah… I would have never guessed someone like him would ever want to be with me… Oh, look at me, I sound like a thirteen year old girl gushing about Edward Cullen. Ugh…!"
Blaine chuckled softly and ducked his head slightly, his eyes still not meeting Kurt's as he muttered "The scarf is beautiful, by the way, it matches your eyes perfectly." There was something about Blaine's voice and how his eyes looked slightly shiny… something was off, Blaine looked positively miserable even if he was smiling – but that was just it, the smile was not reaching his eyes or anywhere near them. It made Kurt's heart shrink painfully. Blaine's smiles were the most beautiful think in the world because they his eyes would always look so alive an full of joy or tenderness. Kurt would've asked about it – he was about to, in fact, but a shrill shriek grabbed both their attentions. Rachel was beaming as she stumbled her way towards them "BLAINE WARBLER!"
Oh no…
The last time Rachel had called Blaine by that name they had spent a night sucking faces.
"I wrote a song about you!"
Blaine frowned "What?"
"I wrote a song about you when you broke my heart!" she slurred beaming. "I should sing it. Do you want me to sing it? I'm gonna sing it!"
Kurt's eyes wandered between the two of them taking in Rachel's pathetic proud grin and Blaine's absolutely dumfounded expression. He chuckled not quite believing what he was witnessing as he watched Rachel grab Blaine's wrist pulling him towards the couch, where she forced him to seat, and climbed onto the coffee table. "ATTENTION EVERYONE!"
She screamed, and Kurt, knowing this would be too good to be true decided to go ahead and help the humiliation by turning off the music and pulling out his phone, ready to film whatever Rachel was about to do.
The party stopped and everyone turned to watch Rachel, just as Drew returned to stand next to Kurt handing him a drink.
"Thanks."
"What's happening?"
"Shh… Just watch."
"I wrote this song when Blaine broke my heart because he don't like boobs." Rachel slurred loudly waving wildly towards Blaine and looking around the room to make sure every eye was on her "Here goes…"
Just like every other story
I'm a girl who met a boy
And now I just feel sorry
Cuz he used me like a toy
All the signs were there
How could I have been so blind?
When he kissed my lips
And I tasted awesomeness
I fantasized of kids
And all kinds of great duets
But there's a thing that got in the way
Now he says he's sure he's gay
Kurt warned me I should keep at bay
But I was dumb and looked away
I kissed him a second time
And now I'm standing in a line
As he goes to wash his mouth
I think my life's gone south
All the signs were there
How could I have been so blind?
I will never have those kids,
Those damned Eurasian looking kids
And those duets are gone for good
Though they would've been gold!
But there's a thing that got in the way
Now he says he's sure he's gay
Kurt warned me I should keep at bay
But I was dumb and looked away
Yeah, I was dumb and looked away…
He's gaaaaaaay!
The room was silent for a good ten seconds before everyone burst into applause and laughter. Rachel beamed at the roaring crowd and bowed a little too eagerly so that she practically feel off the table landing ungracefully on Blaine's lap, who was smiling and laughing at her with amused disbelief.
"Well, that was a masterpiece, Berry!" Santana sneered amused.
"Oh, like Trouty Mouth was any better! I hate you, Satan!" Rachel retorted trying her best to return to a dignified pose with Blaine's help.
"Girls, girls, calm down!" Puck said smoothly (seriously he'd had way too many drinks to look that put together!) "Why the hate? We're all amazing, we should all be proud." His tone was calming as he smiled at both girls before turning to the whole room and opening his arms with a broad smile "We're our fathers' best sperms!"
A moment of silence was following by an outburst of laughter. "Wait, wait, wait!" Finn slurred trying to quiet everyone, his arms outstretched ridiculously as he tried to gain everyone's attention, bore turning to look at Puck like they were discussing the meaning of life "Dude… where's the quality control on the mom part?"
The whole room was silent for a good while, as suddenly everyone (or at least those who were drunk enough for it) took the question seriously and considered it with worried and horrified expressions. After a while Santana patted Finn's shoulder sympathetically "There is none… It's like a monthly lottery. No offense to your mom, who is lovely, but I think you didn't win it. And neither did Berry." She sighed "Your children are doomed."
Just like that the room was back to roaring laughter as Brittany had found the play button and the music returned to its previous blasting state and she took off her shirt to a roar of applause and cat calls. Kurt felt Drew sliding his arm around his waist "I love how that scarf looks on you…" Kurt smiled softly in agreement, even if he had needed some help Drew had indeed outdone himself – this scarf was perfect – especially since he had chosen the color to match his eyes.
Which reminded Kurt of… He looked around but Blaine had disappeared. Kurt's stomach tied itself in a knot – for a moment there he almost thought he was imagining things because Blaine had looked just as amused as everyone at Rachel's humiliation, so he reasoned maybe he wasn't really upset… but now that possibility was off the table. He pulled away from Drew, he needed to find Blaine and find out what was wrong. But just as tried to do so he caught sight of two silhouettes outside, on the front lawn, from the living room window. Wes was standing next to Blaine, and rubbing his arm lightly. Maybe he could just let Wes handle it – after all, other than Kurt, Wes was Blaine's best friend; and it was best that a sober, responsible person stayed indoors to make sure things didn't get out of hand. There was a pang of guilt in Kurt's chest as he turned back to Drew who smiled, wrapping his arms around him, and attached his lips to Kurt's neck. He sighed and tried to relax.
"Everything ok…?" Drew muttered into his ear, slowly pulling away too look at Kurt.
"Yeah… everything's fine." He smiled, kissing Drew slowly for a bit before drawing back to rest his head on Drew's shoulder, exchanging one quick look with him.
"Oh, the scarf totally matches your eyes!" Drew exclaimed, surprise in his voice "Cool!"
"Of course… isn't that why you bought this color?" Kurt frowned.
"Huh…" Drew scratched his neck embarrassed as he admitted "I kind of just bought the color David sent me the link to…"
"Oh… ok…"
"It looks amazing on you, though, so I'm glad I did." Drew chanced a smile and Kurt returned it promptly, his lips quickly captured in what he was sure was a half apologetic kiss from his boyfriend. This time, however, Kurt couldn't be bothered to pay attention to it. A thousand things flying around his head. David was most definitely NOT that observant. And there was only one person besides Mercedes who knew how much he wanted this scarf. The same person who'd just told him it matched his eyes perfectly.
This had to mean something. Did it mean that Blaine was finally accepting their relationship and being as supportive as he'd promised he'd be? Kurt didn't know why that thought didn't really make him feel any better (actually he did, but he just didn't want to go down that path… and he really had enough of a mess in his head without these kinds of doubts).
He broke the kiss and pulled Drew closer, into some sort of hug, resting his chin over his shoulder – Drew's arms around him tightening in what Kurt knew was an affectionate gesture and he smiled almost subconsciously at it; but once again he found himself looking out the window where he could still make out Wes and Blaine, now sitting on the grass, talking. He felt a tightness in his chest, as he watched Blaine run his hands through his hair and shake his head, and Wes leaned closer to put a careful hand on his shoulder.
Kurt couldn't help the voice in his head That should be you out there. and the pang of guilt that once more shot through his body.
"Drew…" he mumbled.
"Mmm?"
"I need to go outside for while, I think Blaine's upset. I need to talk to him."
"What's he upset about?" Drew frowned, pulling back.
"I don't know… that's the thing. I should go talk to him." He jerked his head towards the window and Drew followed the movement, finding the two figures.
"Wes is with him. I'm sure he's fine."
"Still…"
"Kurt." Drew's voice had a tone of exasperation to it "It's your birthday party. Let lose, have fun… Come on, I love this song!"
"But…!"
"But what? Kurt, don't you want to dance with your boyfriend at your birthday party?" Drew sighed "I'm pretty sure Wes can handle it for tonight, don't worry."
Kurt chewed on his lips as his thoughts flew furiously. He wanted nothing but to go outside and replace Wes' soothing hand for his. But if he did that, he just knew he was going to hurt Drew. Kurt wasn't stupid, he knew Drew was still insecure about Kurt's feelings for Blaine, and that would just feed Drew's doubts even further. And it wasn't like his jealousy was totally uncalled for - after all Kurt was still pretty much in love with Blaine (even if he'd never admit that to Drew). It's not like I can't talk to Blaine tomorrow…
He sighed "Ok, come on, let's dance."
Drew grinned and steered him to the middle of the improvised danced floor, landing small and quick kisses on the back of Kurt's neck, before spinning him around and placing each hand on each side of his hips just as Kurt wrapped his arms around his neck. With one last glance at the window and the slightest hesitation, he finally turned his attention to Drew tightening his embrace.