"Eren, what the hell are you thinking about? You look rather silly, dude." Armin said. Eren had been absorbed, looking through his window toward the back garden. "I've never seen you as absent-minded as today."

Eren sighed without looking at his friend. He not only looked distracted but also confused; and Armin could see it from the way his eyebrows arched as he looked through the window.

"You have nothing to worry about, Armin. I'm ok." Eren replied, still not looking at him. Armin put his book aside and took off the glasses he wore to read.

"Pfft. Do you think I'm buying that bullshit? You're surely thinking about something and you don't want to tell me. That's all. Come on, it's been two days since you came back from the hospital and I've never seen you so quiet before."

Eren snorted, turning his head towards his friend.

"Armin, when I talk too much you want me to shut up. And if I keep quiet, you want me to talk. What's wrong? You need to sort out your priorities, bro."

Armin snorted, mocking him.

"I have nothing to sort out, you idiot. Spit it out. Your dad said you have memory lapses because of the blow; is that true?"

Eren nodded. Then he took a sip of water from the glass in his hand.

"Yes. There are things that I don't remember though. By the way, how did I get to the hospital?"

Armin cleared his throat and straightened his back to speak better. It was the moment he had been waiting for, and Eren gave him the perfect excuse.

"You really don't remember anything at all?"

"No. I have a rough idea, but ..." Maybe he had been raving, but he had a slight impression he had said "angel" to a certain someone... No. That was fucking impossible. Simply impossible. Eren shook his head quickly. "No, it's nothing."

"Just tell me. What do you remember?" That subtle smile on Armin's mouth was quite mischievous. But his friend didn't notice it.

"Well ... I was arguing with Faye's babysitter. But, you know it now."

"Yeah, dumbass. And it was she who took you to the hospital."

"What?" Eren opened his eyes wide, while Armin made a great effort not to tease him again.

"Yes. She was with you all that time, despite how shithead you've been with her. She called the ambulance, she went with you in there and she waited at hospital until Aunt Carla and I arrived."

Armin looked pleased to have spit all that information out. Eren was ... Well, he was puzzled, somewhat confused, somewhat annoyed. Then he frowned.

"Bullshit. She told you all that because she feels guilty about what happened and now she wants to be like a heroine in front of everyone."

"Eren!" Armin shouted at him, angrily. "Don't be such a moron. I saw her, she didn't have to tell me anything at all. Where do you get so many stupid things from?"

Eren snorted with dignity.

"Geez, she's a Slytherin. You can't trust them, Armin."

"Who the hell told you that?"

"She herself."

"And how did she? You are supposed to hate each other. I can't imagine both of you guys sitting together talking about Harry Potter with a fucking rainbow in the middle of the convo. That's absolutely nonsense, so I don't believe you."

"Well, she punched me the very day she told me that (as is usual for her to do so)." Eren faked a cough in the middle of his talk. "And it's incredible that you believe her and not me that I'm your best friend. I'm fucked. Really fucked."

This time, Armin cackled while watching how pissed his friend was.

"Look, you can say whatever you want, but that's what she did. And as if that weren't enough, she also stayed at hospital until your mother and I arrived, okay? I think ... No. I don't think so; I am absolutely sure that you owe her an apology."

Eren narrowed his eyes at Armin suspiciously.

"You must be kidding. You are fucking kidding, right? You're not being serious, are you? ..." the boy on the bed saw his friend nodding in response. If he had opened his mouth a little more, his jaw would have loosened, due to his best friend's statement. "Geez, Armin. You are fucking insane. This girl hits me once and twice without reason, and I'm the one who owes her an apology? No no; You're out of your mind if you think I'll do that. It would be the same as ... I dunno, telling her that she already won the bet and she can use me as a punching bag ... Yes, what a smart idea. That's pretty wise of you, or pretty sadistic, which wouldn't surprise me at all coming from you."

Armin let out one of his shit-eating grins at Eren's expression of anger.

"Admit it. Face the fact you deserved that first one. And I wasn't there when she punched you the next time, but probably you deserved it too."

Much to his indignation, Eren snorted as loudly as possible.

"Such a nice friend you are, Armin. But thanks, thanks for everything; for supporting a girl we barely know and leaving me aside. Yeah, very fair of you, buddy."

"Well, she's been working here for almost three months, and you did nothing to get your mother to fire her. So I guess I'm not the only one on her side now." Armin let out a mischievous grin that Eren didn't know how to take, actually.

"What the fuck do you mean? Fuck, Armin. Carla loves the girl, ok? After she saved Faye, Mom does nothing else but praise her. Mikasa this, Mikasa that. Mikasa, Mikasa, Mikasa. I'm sick of listening 'Little Miss Flawless' name every damn time."

"It's okay, Eren." Armin said, now with a serious face. "But the fault is entirely yours. Now you see what I meant when I told you that your plans are god awful and they always end badly? I warned you, but you didn't listen. You chose to listen our featherbrained friend Reiner's advice instead, as always, and now see what it was all about. Here are the consequences of your hotheadedness." Eren was about to react aggressively, but his blond friend raised his index finger in warning. "Don't dare to say a single word if you know I'm right, okay? Or I leave and I'll leave you here to not listen to your blunder anymore."

Silence settled over them. Eren knew his friend was right, so he couldn't say anything if there was nothing to say.

Armin put his glasses back on and grabbed the book he had left aside.

Eren finished his glass of water and looked out the window again.

"I haven't seen Annie in a while … Reiner and Bert either." He said, later.. Armin seemed to ignore him, but actually he was listening.

"Me either." He said harshly, not looking up. He didn't want to touch on Annie's matter.

"They didn't even called me after the first night I spent in the hospital ..."

"Uh-huh."

"Hey, are you listening to me, you bastard?"

"Yes. I'm listening to you, you moron. And I suggest you to watch your tone with me and listen to your mother. They always know better who suits us for friends; she doesn't like Reiner and Bertholdt for a reason."

"But, Armin ... Why the fuck do you say that now?"

"Godammit, you're dense and oblivious as fuck, Eren. Aren't you? Better go to sleep before I lose my shit. It's the wisest thing you can do now."

There was nothing more to say. Armin wouldn't say another word, and Eren had no choice but to do as he was told.

His mind was insistently recalling the memory of a smooth and angelic face, a skin pale as snow, and two gray eyes with a calm and penetrating gaze ...

But no, it couldn't be her. That was impossible.

There were many things in his head at the time, but he didn't want to think about them.

Sasha grabbed Mikasa's phone. The name "Midgety midget" was on the screen, while the black-haired girl cleaned the bathroom with headphones on. It was Sunday morning, and summer was coming.

"Hey you!" Sasha cried, kicking her friend after screaming her name a couple of times. Mikasa turned to her, frowning, because she had been about to fall on the toilet.

"Why did you kick me that hard? I knew you were out of your mind, but not how much."

"Your brother's calling and you don't listen because you want to burst your ears with that thing. Here."

Mikasa took off her gloves and headphones, picking up the phone to answer, dodging Sasha to get out of the bathroom.

"Hi there, midget."

"Hi there, brat. Is everything ok?"

"Meh, boring as fuck, as usual. And you? How's Hanji doing?" she asked. Mikasa could hear a racket on the other side. Yes, it was typical of Hanji to make a fuss when she was excited about something, and she could not help but laugh quietly. "What's the matter?"

"Tch. Don't ask. She has been insisting since morning to tell you, but I don't want to make a fuss about this." Levi replied, with his usual voice tone, between bored and bossy. Hanji kept shouting something that Mikasa couldn't quite understand.

"C'mon, Levi, tell me what's wrong with Hanji."

"I am ..." Hanji's voice sounded clearer now. Surely she was stuck on Levi's phone, and it was also certain that Levi had pushed her. "She's pregnant." He finally said. Judging by his voice tone, Mikasa knew that her brother was even happier than Hanji.

"Ah! Levi!" the girl exclaimed, covering her mouth and eyes opened in surprise. "Is that true? Oh my God ... I'm gonna be an auntie ... Ah, midget, that's beautiful!"

At the same time, Sasha pulled out the lollipop in her mouth to approach her friend with raised eyebrows and ears ready to listen better.

"Is Hanji pregnant?" Sasha mouthed. Mikasa nodded before keep talking.

"Hey, brat, don't call me that way. And less now that I'm going to be a father."

"Eh, you SHOULD be making a fuss, though. A little Ackerman is on his way and surely he won't be as grumpy as you, Levi."

"Tch. Since when are you such a joker, Mikasa? Did Sasha's bad habits hit you? By the way, say hello to her from Hanji."

"And from you too, wise ass." With a smile, Mikasa covered the bottom of the phone, looking at her friend. "They send you greetings." She said before being back to the call. "I'll do anything to go home in the summer, Levi. It doesn't matter how, but I must go."

"Don't you have to run the summer camp at your school in exchange for the scholarship? You can't neglect it, Mikasa."

"Agh. Knock it off. I'll manage, ok? But I wanna go to see you guys and buy baby stuff with Hanji. Besides ... I miss Shiganshina's peace. I wanna go home, even if it's just for a few days."

Levi cleared his throat on the other side before speaking again.

"Hey kid, there's something you must know ..." he was silent for a moment. Mikasa pulled the phone away from her ear to see if Levi hung up, but no.

"Levi? What's wrong?"

"Kenny ..."

Mikasa paled. She hated hearing that name; however, she hoped it was good news for her, like her paternal uncle had died at last, or something like that.

"What's the matter with him?"

"Kenny just got out of jail yesterday." another pause. "He called. He has nowhere to go ... I told him he can stay with Hanji and me for a while."

There was silence again.

Mikasa was trying to deal with all that news. It felt as if a huge ice bucket had fallen on her.

"Mikasa?" Levi said. She stammered a little before speaking again.

"How ... Wasn't he supposed to be there for life? How is it-" her voice trembled now, probably because of her outrage. Sasha, who knew her pretty well, didn't have to listen a word to know what it was about. So she stopped her chores to sit next to her.

"I don't know how, Mikasa. But he's out. He's an old man and he needs a place to go to right now."

"No." this time, the girl's voice didn't tremble at all. It sounded rather deep and threatening. Sasha put a hand on her leg trying to calm her down.

"No what?" Levi said.

"I don't want him at home. No way."

"Mikasa, he's an old man already. Do you think I could leave him out there in the streets?"

"Yes! I do can, because he did the same with us! If you take him home, don't wait for me, Levi. I won't live with that old man in the same place, you hear me?"

"Yes, I can hear you. But listen to yourself now; you are not talking about a nobody, Mikasa; Kenny is family." Despite his anger, Levi tried to remain calm.

"Well, he didn't think the same when he stole what we had after dad and mom died, remember? I can't believe you're so stupid ..."

"Mikasa, watch your tone with me, you hear me?"

"And you better be careful not to make the same mistake twice!" she yelled, ending the call. Blood boiled in her veins. The phone had been thrown on the bed, and her fists were now tightly clenched while she tried to regain her sanity.

The next second, her eyes watered, not of sadness, but rather of helplessness and a growing rage she should keep back.

"Mikasa..."

"Don't dare to come after me, Sasha. I need to be alone." the girl replied, drying her tears roughly as she stood up. Then she took her motorcycle keys and left as fast as she could. Levi was wrong; Kenny had never regretted anything, and he never would. And she was sure nothing would end well if her father's brother came back into their lives.

Again.

A thud was heard on the second floor. Carla and Grisha were upstairs.

"He won't put me to shame, Carla." Grisha said, sternly.

"He is your son, Grisha! Don't you understand that you are making him unhappy?"

"And do you think that because he had an accident a few weeks ago I'm willing to give in? No. He better becomes a doctor, or he won't see penny-one from me. He wants to be a good-for-nothing. An artist, he says. A chef!" Grisha snorted, bitterly. "My grandfather was a doctor, also my father, and I am now. Eren won't be the exception."

"Oh won't he? What about your older son? Why can he do with his life what he likes and not Eren?"

It wasn't the first time Eren heard his name in his parents' arguments. So he sighed and left his bedroom, on his way to the garden.

He was sick of it.

"Leave Zeke out of this. He is an adult. He can do with his life whatever he likes."

"And Eren's not a child anymore, but you insist on treating him as such. What's up with him for you to behave that way? Why did you never force Zeke to do what you force MY son to do so?"

"Carla! I won't make the same mistakes with Eren! Is that hard for you to understand it? You talk as if I love Zeke more than Eren, and nothing can be more wrong than that!"

"Don't push him then to do something he doesn't want to. Don't dare to stop supporting him because he doesn't deserve it. Listen to yourself: you put conditions on your own son for him to do your will. What kind of parent are you?"

"One that, although you don't want to understand it, wishes the best for his children. What has Eren done with his life so far? Tell me! Being friends with a couple of bums that only make him get in trouble? I should have sent him to military school as my father suggested ..."

"Grisha, for God's sake! It wasn't the military school or your father who should have raised Eren, but you! Do you know how many times your son wanted to talk to you? How many times did he want to approach you and you didn't allow him to do so, and now you intend to make him fulfill your selfish desires to see him become a doctor, just for fulfilling an absurd family tradition? He even thinks you're hard on him because you think it's his fault what happened to your father, and no matter how much I try to convince him that he's wrong, he can't believe otherwise because of the way you treat him after the accident."

For a moment, silence settled over the whole room. Grisha spoke next.

"It's already decided. Period. Unless he enrolls in medical school, he won't see a penny-one from me." the doctor said, harshly, leaving the room. Carla burst into tears, for she was about to believe that her son's fears had always been true.

When Mikasa tried to say goodbye to Faye, she was hiding in the cupboard under the stairs. She hid there every time her parents argued, and no one could get her out until the argues stopped, even though they always fought in a room on the second floor, believing their children couldn't hear them.

And Mikasa didn't want to leave without saying goodbye to Faye.

But she didn't want to stay and listen to a fight that was none of her bussiness.

When she went out to the garden, Eren was on the porch, smoking a cigarette with a sullen look on his face, a hand in his pocket and eyes watered. Perhaps because of the breeze that hit his face, or the pain he felt inside and that no one would ever know; he wasn't sure.

Silently, Mikasa sat on the rocking chair on the porch, waiting for Faye to go out; or the child would be really sad if her nanny left without saying goodbye.

When Eren turned his head and saw her, he let out a puff of smoke before speaking.

"Funny, isn't it?" the boy said, bitterly. Mikasa raised her head to him. "Well, I guess it must be fun for you to hear all these things they said about me."

Mikasa shook her head, frowning in utter confusion.

"Excuse me ... What are you talking about?"

Eren stretched his lip in a sneer. He extinguished the cigar, sitting at the other end of the rocking chair.

"Isn't it obvious? It must be an absolute pleasure for you to realize how shitty dysfunctional my family is. So you can make fun of me as you've done all this time, comparing your beautiful family and your perfect parents with mine, right? With my stupid father, who blames me for making my grandfather stop walking."

Mikasa could not help but gasp in outrage.

"What the... Where do you get that from? Did that car hit you that hard?" she exclaimed in frustration. Eren looked at her with that bitter and harsh smile.

"So, what are you doing here if you're not making fun of my misfortune, thanks to my cautious parents?"

"I wait for your sister, you bastard! Not all is about you ..."

"Who says so? The flawless girl with flawless life and perfect parents?"

Despite how calm Eren seemed to be, all he wanted was to make Mikasa lose her temper. And he achieved it. The next second, the girl stood up to him, grabbing his shirt collar.

"Perfect life and perfect parents? You asshole, I have no parents, and a few days ago my brother called me to tell me that my uncle, the man who left us nothing when my parents died, is out of jail asking my brother to receive him home, after he took absolutely everything we had so he could spend it all on gambling, alcohol and women. Do you think this is a fucking perfect life? Do you think it's perfect to have watched your parents die before your eyes when you were twelve years old?" Mikasa's voice started to break at this point. "You have a very distorted view of reality, Jaeger. If you were looking for excuses to annoy me and get the shit out of me, you did an excellent job. Congratulations. You succeed very well." Mikasa released his shirt, willing to leave. "You won the damn bet; because I give up. I won't deal with your shit a day longer."

When she finished speaking, tears had flooded her eyes with a knot made in her throat.

Mikasa walked to the large gate of the Jaeger residence, looking for the keys in her pockets as she dried her tears.

Eren saw her walk away, his mouth open and a guilty knot in the pit of his stomach. He froze up, and he was even shaking because of the shock.

The noise of the keys that Mikasa's trembling hands dropped brought him back to himself.

She picked up the keys and walked as fast as she could to her motorcycle. The next day she would give Mrs. Jaeger her resignation letter.

"Hey!" Eren shouted as she turned on her motorcycle. Mikasa ignored him. "Hey!"

Yes, Eren. You fucking screwed it all up. A voice said in his head.

Armin was right, you owe the girl an apology, and now more than ever.

She's crying, you dumbass! Will you let her go?

"Mikasa..."

"Let go of me, Jaeger. You already got what you wanted. Or is it that you want to put me more to shame?" Mikasa tried to look away so she could hide from Eren the tears that came out of her eyes. However, her voice betrayed her.

"No, no ... Hey ... I didn't want to... I didn't know that ..."

"No. You don't know anything, absolutely nothing. And if you want an advice, never open your mouth again to talk about something you don't know. Now let go of me or I'll hit you ..."

"Mikasa …" Eren could do nothing when she slipped out of his hand.

You are an asshole.

"You are a fucking asshole, Jaeger." Mikasa said, her voice a little hoarse. Her motorcycle roared, and Eren realized his time was over.

Say it. Tell her you're sorry.

But no, the right words didn't come out of his mouth.

"Mikasa!" a high-pitched voice said from the porch. Faye had come out of hiding to look desperately for her nanny.

Mikasa had no choice but to stop her urge to leave.

Faye ran towards her, while Eren watched the scene without being able to move.

"Why are you leaving without saying goodbye? ... And why are you crying? Did Mommy or daddy tell you something ugly?

"Oh no. Of course not. I got something in my eye, that's all. Go inside, ok? And put on shoes, or you'll catch a cold."

Faye nodded quickly.

"We'll watch the Goblet of Fire tomorrow, Mikasa. Don't dare to forget it."

For a moment, Eren wished deep inside that Mikasa would say yes to Faye, that she'd return the next day, and she would forget everything that happened.

But when the girl hugged his sister and kissed her forehead, he knew she had meant it: Mikasa had no intention of coming back.

She was saying goodbye.

Everything is your fault.

If you're not happy, at least let your sister be happy.

Was this how the voice of conscience worked? Why had it been silent then for so long?

"Goodbye, Faye." the nanny said, putting on her helmet. Faye waved her hand.

"See you tomorrow, Mikasa." the girl replied, with an enviable innocence and a smile on her lips, still waving her hand.

The motorcycle moved away. The guilt hit Eren again in the pit of his stomach like a steel fist.

"You must make it up to her, Eren. Or you will lose her." said Hannes, the Jaeger's gardener. He had been hanging around, listening to the youths' discussion from beginning to end. He knew Eren from a very young age, so he was one of the few people capable of telling the boy painful truths without fear of getting an agressive answer.

The Jaeger's gardener had always been pretty observant.

"What? Lose her? Why do you say that to me, Hannes-san?"

"Ah, Eren. You've always been a dense boy, haven't you. But I'm sure you'll understand in a while. I'm leaving. Tell your mother I'll prune the cherry tree in the backyard tomorrow, okay?" Hannes said, with a mischievous grin that Eren didn't understand at all. The gardener took off his gloves and walked towards the exit, whistling a song that Eren knew since his childhood.

Faye looked at her brother for a moment, walking back to the entrance.

"Faye." The boy called her. The little girl turned towards him, already in the porch.

"You're talking to me?"

"Yeah. Is there any other Faye around here?" Eren asked. His little sister shrugged.

"You never talk to me. That is why I am asking."

Eren nodded. He walked a few more steps and reached for her.

"Do you wanna watch Harry Potter with me?"

Faye's eyes lit up noticeably. For the first time and because of his sister, Eren felt his eyes stinging, and this sting went down to his throat and came back to his stomach, there where the guilty knot was.

If he couldn't apologize to Mikasa, at least he would do so with Faye.

"Yay!" the girl shouted, squeezing her older brother's hand, happy as a lark, as if there was nothing better in the world.