Chapter 10: On, New Beginnings, Took Long Enough
Disclaimer: If only I could just…but I can't because they're not mine…damn.
Warnings: Language (though I think you've all figured that part out by now), mentions of rape yada yada so on and so forth. Nothing to awful I don't think.
A/N: I AM SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG! Please hate me later but life with an almost one year old (in one week!) plus a full time job on top of needy family and friends who don't seem to care about my free time…well anyway here it is and I'm so so so sorry it is so ridiculously late.
Thank you to those who reviewed and those who followed (ahhh over 120! nervous now!) You guys make it all worth it!
On with the story.
-BZ-
Blaise hurried to find Draco. Why does the Hospital Wing have to be so far away from everything in this bloody castle! Blaise needed to talk to Draco, he needed to throw up, he needed to do a lot of things, but staying in the hospital wing was not one of them.
When he didn't find Draco in his dorms Blaise lost what little control he had left and punched the wall. He hadn't been able to help his sister all those years ago, and now he felt just as helpless when it came to helping Amelia. He was so good with words, why wasn't he good with actions? Why couldn't he find them before they went through hell?
He looked down at his now throbbing hand. It was bleeding from the course stone wall but instead of healing it he let it bleed and throb as he leaned his back into the cold wall. He tossed his head back into the stone in frustration. He didn't know how long he sat there. It could have been seconds; it could have been hours before Draco finally showed up.
"Hey mate, you alright?" Draco said as he came around the corner. Blaise almost smiled with relief but stopped himself when he saw none other than Hermione Granger following closely behind him, eyes wide and full of fear.
"Hello, Granger. , I'll be alright." He looked Draco in the eye and saw the haunted clouds behind they grey steel.
"Your hand is bleeding," Granger pointed out. Blaise laughed.
"That tends to happen when you punch a stone wall. Not the most brilliant idea I've had recently." Blaise clenched his fist, nothing felt broken at least. The dryimg blood cracked and oozed.
"Shall we go inside or would you both like to get detention for being in the hallway after curfew?" Draco stepped past him and muttered the password. The wall where his door was melted away and they walked through the portal.
Blaise watched Granger as she hesitantly crossed over the threshold into Draco's rooms. Her eyes were wide and appreciative at the décor but he could tell she wasn't really paying attention to color palate. He made his way to his normal place on the couch. He could not muster up enough care to hold himself upright even though Granger was with them.
Like she was one to judge anyway, he thought.
She sat down in one of the armchairs and he noticed Draco hovering next to her like a body guard. They shared a glance that they must have understood silently and Draco sighed and sat down on the couch as close to her as he could get. Blaise smiled. They would be good for each other if only they would allow themselves to be.
"Do you want me to heal your hand?" Draco asked, breaking the silence.
"No, the sting reminds me not to do it again. It doesn't feel broken, just scratched. I'll be fine." Draco nodded as if he understood exactly how Blaise was feeling.
"What happened?" Granger's voice was barely above a whisper and if the room hadn't been silent but for the crackles from the fire, he probably would have missed it. He glanced at Draco, waiting for permission to go into detail in front of Granger unsure where she was in the dealing process.
"She wants to know. I've already tried to talk her out of it but here we are and it's getting late. So…what happened?" Draco expressed what Granger was silently saying with her eyes. Blaise took a deep breath and told them what had happened that night.
He told them everything from the time he left the common room to when they walked into Draco's dorm. He was proud of Granger; she didn't fall apart or run. Once he noticed Draco's hand on her knee, gently and quietly placed there much like Blaise had done with Amelia. A glimpse of the old Granger showed when he mentioned the white light and how it had absorbed into him but it was dashed quickly when he told them where it had led him and what he'd found.
She was still sitting in the chair, Draco leaning forwards with one hand on her knee and the other folded into a fist against his forehead. After retelling it for the third time that night Blaise felt exhausted. Mentally, physically and emotionally exhausted.
"Did you tell them who it was that he'd done this to before?" Again her voice was barely above a whisper as if she didn't trust it not to shake if she spoke any louder.
"No, but after your recent visit I'm sure they're going to figure it out. I'm sorry; it was either that or let them continue to think Draco was guilty. I'm sorry too, mate, I know what I told them was more than we ever wanted to share but that dumb nurse was poking in all the wrong areas and I just sort of…lost it." Blaise waited for the anger to come from Draco but none came. Draco lifted his head and gave a tired half smile and shrugged.
"Don't worry about it. At least they won't keep poking around in our business. Listen, it's late you should just stay here tonight. I'm going to take Hermione back to her rooms and I'll be right back. Take the bed and get some sleep…you're going to need it if you really want to help out Amelia. Women are hard work when they're sane, let alone when they're crazy."
Draco smiled at Granger to show he was joking and she stuck her tongue out at him in return. Blaise wondered if they had any idea what they looked like to an outsider. In such a short amount of time they'd learned things about each other that most couples don't pick up on for months to years, and they weren't even a couple.
Draco was right, he needed to sleep and walking back to the common room, however close it may be, sounded like torture after the night he'd had. He bade his goodnights to Granger and Draco and closed the door behind him. He was just about to lay down when the door opened and Draco came in not bothering to close the door. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a vial filled with purple liquid.
"If you want it, it's yours, that's all I'm going to say about it." Blaise nodded and Draco sat the vial down on the dresser and left the room, this time closing the door for good.
Blaise stared at the vial, weighing his options. Eventually it was decided that the world could go screw itself for the next eight hours and he tossed back the liquid in one swallow. Sleep enveloped him quickly. He was so relieved to not dream of blood and tears soaked into the floor of a tower he once use to love, and all from a girl whose beauty made his breath catch in his chest.
-HG-
Hermione couldn't describe how she felt. She was such a mixture of emotions even her brilliant mind couldn't keep up. She was devastated that someone else was hurt, but she was grateful it wasn't her. She was blindly pissed at the man responsible for it all. She was angry at Draco for telling Blaise. It didn't matter that he assured her Blaise guessed who she was and therefore he didn't break any promises.
How Slytherin of him, she thought when he explained it all.
She felt betrayed but…not all at once. She was confused about the intimacy earlier with Draco. The arguments and the admissions on both sides, the embrace they'd shared and the promise she'd made not to run anymore was all so much to absorb and process. She felt safe because Draco was there with her and yet she felt exposed because now her secret was everything but out in the open. She was exhausted, but at the same time she didn't think she could ever find the peace of mind to fall asleep.
"Come on, Hermione; let's get you back to your dorms." Draco had come out from his bedroom where Blaise had disappeared. She took a moment to really look at him. He was tall and he'd filled out over the last couple years. He wasn't gangly any more and she could see faint blonde stubble around his defined angular chin. The arms that had held her so tight and made her feel so safe were muscled and toned to near perfection. A perfect Seeker build with a dash of danger and forbidden curiosity on top. How had she missed him all this time? Clearly he was attractive but his attitude towards her had always marred his features into something grotesque and ugly and she hadn't been able to see past it.
I see it now, she admitted silently.
"Do I have something on my shirt?" She snapped herself out studying of his features and suppressed a blush. She was such a mess right now. Checking out Malfoy while sitting on his couch? Something was direly wrong with her.
"No, nothing. I'm sorry; I'm uhm… just thinking about tonight and well…everything." He raised an eyebrow at her and offered his hand.
"About what exactly?" Draco asked as he led them to the doorway. It was so strange to be chatting with Malfoy of all people like she would one of her closest friends. So much had changed in such a short amount of time and she hadn't had any time to analyze anything. It was all very overwhelming and unexpected.
"Nothing." She heard him growl low and threatening and she looked up at him, confused.
"We've already had that argument about what nothing is and what it isn't. You can't think 'nothing'. It's an active process meaning there is something there to be thinking about. So, at the risk of sounding redundant, about what exactly are you thinking?"
If only you knew, she drawled to herself.
They walked in silence until they were halfway back to her dorm when her steps faltered. Halfway there and then he was going to leave her for the night. He was going to go back to his dorms and she would be alone. She hated being alone, well no she just hated feeling vulnerable and right now vulnerable meant being alone, without protection. After everything that had happened she didn't want to be alone. Where her Gryffindor courage had gone she wasn't sure.
"What now?" he asked when she slowed her steps in the hallway.
"I was just… I don't want to be alone tonight." He studied her as though he were studying a complex runes problem. His eyes flashed something but as brief as it was she couldn't read into what it could have meant.
"You know your rooms are safe, so what's to be afraid of?" She shrugged. If she couldn't put the feelings she was having in the right order in her head, how exactly was she supposed to explain them to him in a way he would understand?
"I'm not really afraid; I just don't want to be alone. Knowing that he's still doing this to unsuspecting girls makes my skin crawl. I know he can't get to me from inside my dorm but that doesn't take the chill away when I…when I remember." Hermione's voice dropped low and she wasn't entirely sure he could even still hear her.
"I always remember when I'm alone." He didn't respond but his face said everything she needed to see. He understood and that right now was what she needed. They continued in silence, her worrying her lower lip and he processing her words and admissions.
Once they reached her dorm he turned as if to say something to her but must have changed his mind because his mouth opened and shut quickly but no sound came through his parted lips. He turned to the portrait, recited her pass-phrase, and then waited for her to walk in before following.
Wandlessly he started the fire and then continued on to get the supplies for her treatment. She jumped when he slammed the ball like he'd now figured out how to do and ground it up to a fine powder. She lay down on the couch, leaving room for him as if it were second nature now. Only two treatments and it's routine, it was a strange feeling.
Everything is strange now.
Without asking he came over and motioned for her to pick up her head. She did so and he placed a pillow on his lap and she got comfortable, another strange feeling. Comfortable, around Malfoy? Never in a million millennia did she ever expect to feel that way. But she did and somehow it helped with her treatments. Knowing what was coming was half the battle but when your body screamed for air, knowledge went out the window and panic settled in quickly. They'd figured out quickly that the comfort from someone else being there eased the process for both parties.
She tipped the powder back and waited out the effects. Once her breathing stopped she stared into his eyes. Neither blinked and she counted the flecks of almost blue in the grey depths. He held her gaze and stroked her hair. She wondered if he was just doing that because it made his life easier or if he actually enjoyed doing it. He was a mystery. The motive behind his actions perplexed her and after everything else that had happened between them, the confusion meter in her brain was at an all time high.
Hermione's breathing returned to normal and Draco got up from the couch. She already missed his closeness. When did I become so needy towards him? She wondered. He stood awkwardly in the center of her room looking torn between wanting to leave and not wanting to cause her pain by leaving.
"You don't have to stay, I'll be fine," she said quietly in the awkward silence. He snorted in a most un-Malfoy way.
"The last time you said that…well you weren't fine." She hung her head, they hadn't mentioned that since their argument the day before and she'd hoped he wouldn't bring it up anymore. "I'm sorry, that wasn't…I'm just tired. It's all a bit much to take in." She nodded and expected him to leave. She wanted him to leave, but yet she wanted him to stay. Why couldn't things be simple for her anymore?
"I'll stay, but only on one condition." She looked up at him intrigued yet apprehensive to hear his conditions.
"You have to make it to one full class tomorrow. We have Potions first thing in the morning. You don't need a wand; you can appease your Gryffindorks." She shot him a glare that he ignored. "There's minimal touching and you can focus on your work. You promise to go to that class at least, and I'll stay here tonight."
Those were reasonable terms. She was already going to try to make it to Potions tomorrow anyway. She had a better chance at it now that she would get a good night's sleep.
"Thank you, I promise to make it to Potions tomorrow." She stepped up to him and placed her hand on his. His hand hung limply at his side but she saw his entire body tense as she drew near and could practically see him overanalyzing his reaction to her touch. It was a bold move on her part. Usually she only touched him when she was crying and that was more of a fall-into-him-for-support thing than a conscious want to be close to him. Draco looked down at her hand and back up at her, his eyes flickered again, that same something still unreadable behind them and it made her stomach flip.
"Thank you, Draco, for everything." He nodded and she was sure he didn't trust his voice at the moment for fear of what he might hear in it. "There are blankets and pillows in the trunk over there; this really means a lot to me. Goodnight." She turned and walked into her room. She felt good enough to not have to take a dreamless sleep potion. She preferred not to anyway. Sleep came quickly, unfortunately for Hermione, so did the nightmares she was so hoping would stay away.
Hermione was walking with Draco outside. The sun was shinning, the grass was green, and the lake water was rippling against the soft breeze. It was a perfect day and she couldn't help but smile at the present company. He smiled down at her as well. His grey eyes were bright and clear. The birds were singing a merry tune as they're ought to do in such dreams as this, and everything seemed right with the world.
The day turned to night and they found themselves out on a moonlit walk across the grounds doing Head duties together and talking about nonsensical things. They stopped by the boat house, trying to make their night last as long as possible. They sat at the end of the short pier and Hermione dipped her toes into the water. She looked up into Draco's eyes again and they were the same as before, warm and inviting. She smiled at him and leaned in to kiss him gently, as if they'd done it a thousand times.
A laugh tore through the night. It was an evil laugh, one that nightmares lived for. She pulled away from him and looked up into his eyes. She expected confused grey but received glowing red and he was laughing the same terrible laugh as before and then he was gripping her arms forcefully. She tried to break free of his hold but he was stronger than her and she couldn't move.
He wouldn't stop laughing. It was so familiar and she tried to pull away from him repeatedly, but he held her.
She tried to tell him to let go but her voice was gone. She tried to scream but nothing came out. She tried to scratch at him, kicked out with her feet but all she felt was water. He was still laughing; it was deafening how loud it was. She thrashed and managed to pull her legs up only to have him straddle her, pushing her down so she lay flat on the pier and he pinned her arms above her head. Red eyes danced above her and the laugh was almost Cheshire like. Teasing and taunting, like a cat playing with its food before killing and devouring it.
She struggled against him and he came down to claim her mouth as well. He'd almost reached her mouth and she turned her head away as best she could.
-Hermione-
He was still coming for her. Red eyes were glowing; his hands pushed her arms painfully into the pier…
-Hermione-
Someone was calling her name! She shouted out for help but no sound escaped her lips. His legs held her still and he put both wrists into one hand and forced her to look up at him with his free hand. He came down at her again.
-Hermione-
She could feel tears trail wet tracks down her cheeks. He laughed again and claimed her mouth as his.
-Hermione, please!-
He tasted vile. He squeezed her jaw and she had no choice but to open, his tongue darted inside and claimed her mouth as his. She wanted to throw up. She tried to bite his tongue but his strong, forceful hand kept it open and unresponsive.
-Fuck, Hermione don't do this! Please! Wake up!-
She was dreaming! Her heart soared even as her stomach revolted against the intrusion. She could wake up! She could wake up and be safe if only she knew how to do it.
She tried; she closed her eyes and focused on the voice, the soft but frantic voice that made her think of trust. It was a good voice, a solid and safe voice. She willed herself awake.
-Please…-
Eventually the maniacal laugh became distant and the glowing eyes burned themselves out. Everything around her blurred.
Hermione's eyes flew open and she shot up in bed. She collided with something hard and she was immediately enveloped into a tight embrace. It wasn't like in the dream. This was safe and comforting. She melted into it.
She could hear Draco whispering reassuring words in her ear and all she could think about was how glad she was that he was there. Again.
"Shhh…it's okay. I'm here, it was just a dream. He can't hurt you; you're safe now." Draco stroked her hair but she only knew he was doing it because she could see his arm moving. She was numb again; she couldn't feel anything but the overwhelming fear. It was like Draco read her mind because his soothing words changed; they became questions, questions like he'd asked before. Questions she didn't want to answer.
"Can you feel me? Can you feel my arms around you?" She shook her head no. It was scary not feeling, like every nerve in her body conveniently decided to forget how to function properly. "Feel my fingers in your hair, Hermione. Feel them getting caught in your mass of tangles. The tug and pull with each release." The more he talked, the more she felt. Her fear began to ebb away and life returned to her consciousness. He continued pushing her though, asking her to feel this and that. Her tears slowed and her breathing returned to normal.
How does he make everything better without even trying? She wondered.
Draco released her and leaned her back against her pillows. She didn't like the space, she felt safer whenever he was close, but she didn't argue. She knew he wasn't one for physical contact like that and she shouldn't want it from him anyway. She should be putting distance between them but the closeness felt so good. She was amazed at what he'd already done for her so far and she didn't want to push it.
"Tell me," he said quietly into her hair. He didn't have to expand on his statement. Hermione knew what he wanted. But the fact of the matter was, she didn't want to, she didn't want to remember. That was always the problem…the remembering. It was terrifying living through it once and remembering just made it all come back, flooding her with anxiety and fear and reinforcing her self hatred at not being able to protect herself.
"Hermione," he continued, "just like you need to start feeling, you need to start talking. I understand you don't want to talk about what happened that night. And I'm not asking you to right now. But this was just a dream, you can tell me about what happened because it didn't really happen. You know what I'm saying right? A dream can't hurt you, not in your head and not while you talk about it."
She knew logically he was right. It was just a dream and it couldn't hurt her. But remembering anything to do with being forced into something, anything to do with him was painful down to her soul. It wasn't physical harm but it was pain none the less.
Could she talk to him? A week ago they never even shared a friendly hello and now he was the only person she trusted. It was a crazy notion to wrap your head around in such a short time. There were things that he'd seen of her that no other person, besides him, had seen before. He'd pulled her back from death twice. He'd protected and looked after her with nothing promised in return. She didn't understand what was happening between them but she did understand that he was only trying to help.
"Please," he said so quiet that if the room hadn't been deadly silent she would have missed it. It sounded very much like the last please she heard before she woke up. It sounded defeated, like he was desperate for her to talk to him but she wouldn't give in. Yet another thing she didn't understand. What had happened to his 'Malfoy's don't show emotion' and 'Malfoy's don't talk' mottos? When had Draco gone from emotionless 'Malfoy' to empathetic 'Draco'?
And since when does he say please? Her mind added. She'd tried to do this on her own and push him away but every time she had she'd screwed it up somehow. Maybe she should give him a chance. After all, he did say please, she added quickly. It would hurt but she decided to give him the chance he'd offered her so many times.
Hermione pulled herself away from Draco, curling up her knees and picking at her nails. Half of her body yearned for his touch while the other half shied away and needed the space.
"It started off good. We were on our rounds out by the boat dock." She decided to leave out the first part and the brief kiss. Nothing about that part was tainted and she wanted to keep that part for herself. She hadn't even had a chance to analyze what it could have meant so sharing it with the person of interest wasn't be best idea at the moment.
Draco sat quietly, something she thought he wouldn't know how to do, and listened. He gave her a rare and encouraging smile. It was gone as quick as it came but she saw it and it gave her the strength she needed to continue.
"It was you and everything was fine and then it…well it wasn't you anymore." She continued to tell him about the dream. He sat and listened quietly, absorbing her words. She saw him clench his jaw tighter and tighter as she went on. Hermione also left out the last call that broke into her dreams. Draco didn't need to know that she had heard him beg her to wake up. It was a moment she hadn't dealt with yet and she wasn't sure where he was with it either. Pleading was yet another 'Malfoy' thing he wasn't supposed to do and it surprised her that he was worried about her enough to break his beloved Malfoy code of conduct.
"When I realized it was a dream, when I heard you calling out my name, I focused on waking up. It helped, you know. I heard you calling for me and it gave me strength to fight. Does that even make sense?" She looked up into his eyes and she found a mixture of emotions. Sympathy, anger, a hint of fear, but surprisingly the emotion that showed through the most was, understanding.
"It does. What uh…what all did you hear exactly?" So I was right, he's afraid I heard him pleading.
"Just my name, that's all." She'd let him keep his pride. He'd done so much for her; the least she could do was let him hold on to the one thing he held the closest.
"Ah…good. So was it that awful to tell? You made it out alive." A smirk twisted his lip at the end and she couldn't help but give a small twitch of a smile in return. Why was this so easy now? It took rape and suicide attempts to mellow out the animosity and anger they had towards each other? At least something positive came from all the bad she'd gone through, and all the bad he'd gone through, and everything that they'd gone through together…at least some good had come from it.
She chewed her lip and continued to pick at her nails. It was good wasn't it? This…whatever it was between them, it was good right? What was there to hate each other about now? Especially after the consistent rescuing and comfort coming from him in the last week.
"Granger?" He pulled her back to the present.
"What? Oh, no, not as awful as I thought it would be," she admitted.
"Talking will help, as much as I hate to admit that…it does. I understand that not everything needs to be said but getting things out when they overwhelm you might help relieve some of the nightmare's you're having. When…when I was dealing with the fall out from my father…" he paused and sighed in resignation, almost as if he couldn't believe he was going to continue. She was shocked that he was willingly offering information about himself in any capacity.
"After everything…you know… Voldemort and my father's trial and all, I had a lot to deal with. I technically became the head of the Malfoy family at 15, along with everything that comes with. Very few people know this but I started to have nightmares and I sank into a deep depression. Blaise eventually had to set up an intervention of sorts. I blew most of it off but one thing that did stick in my thick head was keeping a journal. I was no good with the journaling, and definitely felt stupid when I did write, but I did manage to write my dreams.
"You would be good at journaling. You always have something to say about anything and everything and we all know that your hands are immune to writer's cramps." Draco flashed Hermione his irritating trademark smirk but this time it made her laugh. It startled her, laughing after such seriousness between the two of them but it seemed to have been the desired response as Draco laughed as well.
"If you can't talk, Hermione," he said seriously again, "then write. Just get it out. I know I'm asking a lot but just… don't bottle everything up." She hummed an okay not having a voice anymore, and then she remembered he'd promised to bring his pensieve over.
"What happened with the pensieve?"
"Bloody hell, I forgot all about that. Tomorrow, I'll bring it by after classes." His involvement with the conversation seemed to be over when abruptly stood to leave and Hermione felt a strange pull in her chest. She didn't want him to leave. Before she could ignore her brain, follow her gut and ask him to stay, he crossed the room and picked up the purple bottle she'd ignored before. When he turned back to her his eyes were full of the same understanding she'd seen earlier.
"I know you don't want it, but just do it tonight. You're headed back to class tomorrow and you need your sleep, so just…take it." She couldn't really argue with him. He had a point, she did need sleep and he would be in the other room still so it wasn't like she'd be completely alone. Reluctantly, she agreed.
"I don't want to, but I will." He looked relieved when handed her the vial. She glared at it for a moment but then tossed it back and after swallowing it she settled down under her sheets facing away from the door and away from him. He was almost out the door before she turned around and called out for him. Again she was conflicted on whether or not she wanted him to stop or to ignore her completely and walk out the door.
"Draco?" He replied with a hum of interest and her stomach hummed back, sending itself into a little flip-flop that made her falter for a moment with remember what she was going to say. "Thank you…you know…for waking me up, and well for…everything." The potion was already working and she felt it dragging her under but she heard him reply quietly before darkness took over.
"You're welcome, Hermione, goodnight."
-DM-
If anyone had told Draco that he would be a nervous wreck over a potions class, a class he loved and excelled in, because of Hermione Granger and that he'd be worried about how she was going to react to her classmates and two best friends, Tweedle-Dee and Tweedle-Dipshit, without his help he would have had them admitted to the Hospital Wing for fear of delirium.
Although, if anyone had told Draco that he would be waking up in afore mentioned Hermione Granger's sitting room after willingly holding her, in her private rooms no less, and telling her secrets about his own troubled life, he would have had them sent to St. Mungo's for fear of a serious trauma to the head.
But that was where he found himself. After doing her morning med dose he had left her rooms to freshen up in his own dorm and to snag them some breakfast. He didn't want to deal with her and the Great Hall again. One thing at a time today and the main thing she needed to do was actually make it to class.
Granger didn't seem nervous on the outside but he knew she was a twisted ball of nerves on the inside. She was biting her bottom lip and twisting her fingers, things he'd picked up on as being signs of unease in her. She would pace and sit and then pace again. It didn't help that they were both early risers so they'd had plenty of wait time before heading out to the dungeons.
Just before leaving the room he stopped her in her tracks and made her look at him. They were ready to go but he needed her a bit more prepared, if not for herself than for his sanity.
"There will be people around you, you know that. Snape will have your hide if you drop an ingredient because someone brushes your arm and startles you. No one can hurt you down there. I'm there and your friends are there. If anything, take comfort in Snape's sharp eye for once. He won't let us talk to anyone but our partners so unless you're convinced it was one of your two dunderhead friends then I wouldn't worry about having to deal with anyone else."
"I know. I can't promise I won't be jumpy but I will do my best not to freak out like yesterday." She gave him a half smile and he resisted the urge to pull her into a tight embrace and just tell the rest of the world to fuck off.
These thoughts are getting annoying, he thought to himself. He still wasn't comfortable with the developments between the two of them in the last few days. There was way too much touching and emotion-sharing for his liking.
"One more thing, Hermione, no one knows we can bear to be in each other's company, let alone be friendly to each other so…if I say anything, you know, like the things I would have said before all this happened…don't take it personal. When we leave here you're Granger, the know-it-all, lives-to-be-a-pain-in-my-ass-Gryffindork Princess again." He smirked at her and she sent him one back that even his father would have been proud of.
"And you're Draco Bloody Malfoy, the Slytherin Prince of Assholes, whose life goal is to be a jerk to all he deems beneath him. Yea, I got it. It's going to be fine…everything will be fine." She sounded sturdy and strong but her eyes gave away her anxiety for the hours to come.
"Fine, huh? You say that when nothing is 'fine'. I'll still be around, if you need me, and I mean really need me, Granger. But you won't because everything will be, as you so eloquently put it, fine." He didn't want to show how nervous he was, he needed to be the strong one of the two of them, but after yesterday's freak out at the Great Hall he truly was worried about how she was going to handle the day ahead.
"You're right," she conceded. "Everything will be fine. Let's go." And with that said she grabbed her bag and left the room, leaving him behind to send up a silent prayer to the gods for just one thing to go right this week. That wasn't too much to ask for, right?
"May the gods help us today," he muttered as he silenced her fire with a flick of his wand and swiftly exited the room.
They decided to part ways at the fork at the end of the hallway, he going left and she going right. She was heading towards a different route to the dungeons that she thought would be more secluded from the busy hallways. Although he wished she would stay within eyesight, he knew she had a point. Seeing Draco Malfoy and Hermione Granger walking civilly down the same hallway and not flanked by two other friends would cause the school to become a rumor mill for all kinds of wicked theories by the end of the first class.
"Draco!" Draco stopped where he was in the busy hallway and turned toward where he thought the voice had come from. He saw Blaise's head bobbing through the crowd. He was a head taller than most students save for the few taller seventh years, such as Draco and sadly the fire-head wanker, Weasley. He waited for Blaise to catch up and they continued to walk down the hallway.
"You know, trying to catch up to someone in the hallway going to opposite way of the general mass is a lot like those salmon trying to get upstream, nearly impossible," Blaise said with a slight huff to his words as he caught his breath. He leaned close to Draco's ear and whispered, "So, is Granger showing up today?"
"That's the plan. No need for a wand in double potions and then she has ancient runes and CoMIC this afternoon." Draco and Blaise had been calling the big oaf's ridiculous excuse for a class 'comic' since third year. It stood for Care of Massively Idiotic Creatures.
They had decided to keep on with it because it was such an easy class, albeit a bit on the dangerous side, as the small scar on his arm reminded him. His father, even though he went forward with all the legal proceedings of getting the hippogriff killed, was furious when he heard how Draco had acted and had kept the healers from removing the scar once it was closed and healed inside.
There was evidently some sort of Malfoy rule he didn't listen to against being rude to ancient and proud creatures, hippogriffs included. Malfoy's weren't rude, they were right and they were firm in their beliefs but they weren't rude. Whatever, so many bloody rules to follow anyway, he remembered thinking as his father droned on, and on, and bloody fuck on.
They'd reached the hallway to the dungeons and surprisingly the Golden Trio was already heading into the classroom.
"Well she didn't run away this time," Blaise mumbled under his breath and Draco couldn't have been more relieved than he felt at that moment. He was thankful Blaise knew what was going on so he had an extra set of eyes on Hermione. He wondered how what's her name was doing…Amanda? Annabelle?
"How's…Annabelle?" Blaise laughed and shook his head.
"Amelia, and she's dealing. Got a right strong head on her shoulders. She broke down once this morning talking to me about it but you'll never guess where we were. Bloody crazy, headstrong Ravenclaw." Blaise stopped outside the Potions room. "We went back to the Astronomy Tower."
Draco couldn't help but drop his jaw in shock. Head strong was an understatement. Less than twenty four hours and she'd already faced the place where she was raped?
"Exercising your jaw there, Malfoy? I'm sure your boyfriend there appreciates the extra attention… just take it somewhere else will ya? I don't want to lose my breakfast."
"Ron…" He heard Hermione sigh and he thought he caught the end of an eye roll. Right, time to test the waters.
"What's the matter Granger, bit too crude for the prude?" He heard Blaise's minute intake a breath and truth be told he was holding his own breath waiting to see how she reacted to him now that they were back on opposing sides. She on the other hand, rolled her eyes at him and smirked.
That smirk makes her so infuriatingly attractive, wait…no… fuck.
"No, Malfoy. I just don't think it is worth anyone's time to acknowledge your presence, let alone waste their energy on insulting you." She smiled a wicked smile at him and he glared at her in return. He wasn't sure where the renewed Granger came from but he was glad to see she remembered how to be herself, as irritating as she normally was. He strolled up close to her, both to seem intimidating to everyone else and to see what her eyes were really saying.
"Touching that you find me both worthy of your time and your energy as you saw fit to attempt to insult me." He stared hard into her eyes and he saw the anxiety from earlier still lingering but mostly the old fire-whiskey burn he missed seeing.
"Someone had to put you in your place," she shrugged. "It was my turn to fall on the sword."
Before he could respond Snape closed the door with a flick of his wand and strolled, robes billowing as they were prone to do, to the front of the class. Draco quickly took his seat next to Blaise and Theodore Nott.
"Stirring the pot early, Draco?" Theo asked quietly under his breath seeming a bit more cheerful than normal. Mornings never were Theo's favorite time of day so it was odd for him to be addressing anyone at this hour, let alone be cheerful about it.
"Keeps things interesting," was all Draco had time to say before Snape began their long double potions class.
Draco took in the room around him, allowing Snape's voice to drift off from the forefront of his attention. He wasn't saying anything he hadn't heard before. He nearly snorted aloud as he studied his classmates. A pathetic bunch if he had ever seen one. Sleep deprived Gryffindors and Slytherins together in a classroom filled with volatile potion ingredients for half the day with only one small break. What brilliant mastermind thought this was a good idea? But it had been that way since day one.
The Tweedle-Twats sat together looking half asleep and irritated at having to be in potions this early…or really at all. The Irish bloke who loved to blow himself up, that Thomas guy and Longbottom all sat together. Longbottom still looked his normal scared out of his mind to be anywhere near Snape, though Draco had to give it to the kid…he kept coming back for more and more punishment.
Must be all that Gryffindor idiocy running through his veins.
Hermione was sitting as far away from everyone as possible but still paying avid attention to the Potion's Master. She seemed to be doing alright. So far, so good. He sent her a wink when her eyes flickered to his and she returned it with a roll of her eyes.
When he turned back he noticed Pansy's gaze on him but he ignored her unasked question. He smirked and nodded at Pansy when she threw him a silent bored snore from behind her hand. Snape wasn't saying anything she hadn't heard either. Crabbe and Goyle were still chewing on some sort of food from breakfast. Theo seemed to wander between paying attention and falling back asleep, though he dared not actually fall asleep. This was Potions after all and even though Snape doted on them as they were his house students, no one was safe from his wrath if they were to fall asleep in his class.
Draco's perusing of his classmates ended at Snape's next words and then whole class went into an uproar.
"As you all may know by now, Headmaster Dumbledore has decided to implement inter-house unity during classes. From here on out you will be working with someone from the opposite class and as such I have decided whom will be partnered with whom." The class erupted in tones and voices of arguments and hostility. Snape, sensing he was quickly losing the attention of his class slammed his hand down on the nearest desk, making the entire class, yes even Draco, jump in their seat.
"Any ideas of switching partners or complaining to me about your new partner will be rewarded with 30 points from your house and three days detention with Filch. Understood?"
Draco could tell no one was happy with this news and he wasn't entirely sure this wasn't going to be the worst cluster-fucked idea ever implemented at Hogwarts but…who was he to argue when the punishments were so…undesirable? Perhaps he would get lucky enough to be partnered with Granger. Gods forbid even the idea of him and Weasel-Twat being partnered.
"You will move to the location of the first name I say and I will not repeat myself on the repercussions of arguing." Snape paused as if to dare someone to already argue.
"Nott and Potter." A small groan from Potter's side of the room range out in the silence and Draco thought he heard an 'It could have been worse' come from Potter.
"Thomas and Crabbe." Draco heard Thomas sigh but nothing else from him.
"Parkinson and Weas-
"NOT A BLOODY CHANCE IN HELL!" Draco all but dropped his head on the desk in irritancy and he heard the Gryffindors try to calm their hot headed classmate. "I will NOT work with that Cow!"
"Mr. Weasley," Snape interrupted slow and smooth as if enjoying this moment and savoring it. It did not pass Draco's attention that the Professor and conveniently interrupted Pansy's return remark thus keeping her out of trouble. "You will be joining Mr. Filch for the next three nights and 50 points from Gryffindor for arguing and calling your fellow classmate names. I suggest you move over to Miss Parkinson's desk before I double your punishment." When no more response came from the red head but a lot of book slamming and swearing under his breath just under auditory level, Snape continued with his list.
"Longbottom and Zabini."
"Goyle and Finnigan."
"Last but not least, our Head girl and boy. Granger and Malfoy.
"Take your seats; you have five minutes to be ready to begin brewing the Hiccoughing Solution." There was a crescendo of paper and book shuffling and whispers of 'It won't be that bad right?' around the room. Draco on the other hand, was extremely pleased with the positive turn of events. He gathered his things, sent Pansy a look of sympathy as she scooted as far away from the volatile red head as possible and gracefully strode over to Hermione's desk.
"Granger," he smirked. "It seems fate has us stuck together yet again. Shall we get started?"
A/N: So what did you think? The little tiny hints at solid growing feelings and not just adrenalin rushes, those were good right? Hermione's back bone is growing again, slowly. Good, yes? Draco is still fighting what he's feeling but that's why we love him.
Next chapter will be the rest of the potions class and a confrontation after, but between whom exactly? We shall see.
Please read and review, I'm having a hard time finding time to write but reviews make me want to please my readers and that means less sleep if necessary to find more time for writing. Thank you again to all that review and follow/favorite. Loff you all tons and tons!