CHAPTER TEN
"It has been a whole year, Uther, how many more men will have to die before you realize that Morgana is gone?" Giaus asked the king.
Uther stood with his back to his old friend, looking out across the battlements.
"She is out there, Giaus and I will not rest untill she is returned to me, do you understand?"
Giaus nodded.
Out in the countryside, well beyond Camelot, Arthur and Merlin were riding with a few of the knights. Many had fallen in the search for the king's ward and many were also badly injured. Uther had sent his knights through kingdoms without permission from the other leaders and had paid the price for it.
ut to him, Morgana was worth more than his whole cavalry.
"Does Uther really think that he will find Morgana again?" Merlin asked Arthur as they rode into the forest.
Arthur nodded as the rain pelted them.
"If my father believes that Morgana is still out there, then so do I. She's like a sister to me, Merlin, I cannot lose her."
Merlin nodded and as much as he missed her, he wondered if she was even alive. What if Morgause hadn't been able to save Morgana? What if the poison had already done it's damage?
As they went deeper into the forest, Arthur halted his men and dismounted.
There was a camp and the people had deserted it but someone had stayed behind and they were coming closer.
Arthur drew his sword and walked forward cautiously.
A figure came into view and Merlin recognized her before they did.
Morgana was alive.
She had changed into a clean white dress and had her hair washed.
When they had found her, she looked terrible; her long hair was greasy and matted and dirt covered her face with her clothes muddy and ripped.
But now she looked like the Morgana they all knew and loved.
Gwen was fussing over her, making sure that she had everything she needed and Arthur was with her in her chamber. It felt good to hold her again.
She, who had been like a sister to him for all these years.
She was trying to tell him what she had been through but the tears made her speech slow and she fought to get herself under control.
"The men held me captive for months but then one day, they went hunting, they thought I was alseep... and that's when I ran, I had been trying to find my home ever since and when I saw you..." She swallowed
-"I could not believe it. I thought I was seeing things."
Arthur sighed and pulled Morgana into his arms. She held onto him as tears slid down her cheeks.
Giaus had woken Merlin up from his sleep and told him that he was requested in Morgana's chambers. His heart thudded in his chest and he began to sweat. He had told Giaus what he had to do and his guardian did not blame him. It was for the good of Camelot after all. But now that Morgana was safe and she knew what he had tried to do, she could easily just tell Uther and Merlin would be offered no trail, It would mean certain death.
Merlin made his way up to her chambers and looked in. She had her arms around Arthur and was sobbing softly.
Her sea green gaze locked with his and she pulled back slightly.
Arthur glanced over his shoulder and nodded at Merlin. He couldn't tell what was going through Morgana's mind. There was a time when he had been able to, he had known her that well but now... now she was different and he didn't know if he should be wary or not.
Arthur got up and walked past Merlin.
"I expect to see you shortly." He said harshly.
Merlin nodded and avoided Morgana's gaze as she turned to look at him.
She nodded her head;
"Shut the door." It was said quietly, without any venom.
Merlin did as she asked and she got to her feet, walking over to him.
"I know what you did... you tried to poison me."
The hurt in her voice was almost too much for Merlin to bear and he stared into her eyes, his voice was pleading.
"I didn't want to, there was no other way, you were the vessel and I knew that killing you was the only way. Please believe me, Morgana, I never wanted to kill you."
She nodded and looked down at the floor then back up at him, her eyes bleary with tears.
"I forgive you, Merlin, I would have done the same. If I knew what I was doing at the time, I would have taken my own life just to make it stop." She told him.
He looked shocked by this confession.
"I thought that if Uther no longer ruled, then magic could return to Camelot, I now see that I was wrong, and I have to hope that Arthur will come to see magic as a force for good.
When I found out that Uther had spent a whole year searching for me, I realized how wrong I was to doubt his love for me. He is a good man and an even better king and you, Merlin, I have not been kind to you."
Merlin frowned in confusion at her.
She sounded so totured that he just wanted to hold her and tell her that everything was going to be alright. He would let no harm come to her ever again.
He walked towards her and did just that.
He pulled her into his arms and she sighed against him as fresh tears came to her eyes.
"I won't ever hurt you again, Morgana." He vowed.
"It's alright... you had to do it. You had no choice." She sobbed against his jacket.
He smoothed her hair and sighed.
"I'm sorry for everything that has happened to you. I promise that whenever you need me, I'll be there for you. You have my word."
She pulled back a little and looked into his blue eyes.
"That's another thing, we cannot continue what we have, Merlin. I would like to but it is too dangerous. Uther would find out and he would not spare you again. I cannot risk that. Please believe that this is for the best, maybe one day but just not now, not while Uther rules."
Merlin hated the notion of not being able to be with her, talk to her and look after her but he had to accept what she wanted and he knew in his heart that she was right. It seemed that she had really grown up while she was being held captive.
It was just a shame that she had to learn about her wrong doings in that way.
Seeing her alive and well was all Uther had ever wanted and as she walked into the great hall where he was with his counselors, he ignored them all and got to his feet as she walked towards him.
He started walking towards her and then it just wasn't quick enough, they both almost ran to each other and Uther pulled her into a fierce hug.
He cried when he looked down into her face.
She chuckled through her own tears and smiled at him.
"It is so good to have you back." He told her.
Her smile grew and she hugged him again.
"I realize that I have not been the easiest ward to get along with and I am sorry for giving you so much trouble." She said with a slight chuckle.
"Nonsense, if you did not argue with me you would not be you."
They both laughed and she looked at the counselors behind him.
"I shall leave you to your council, My Lord."
She pulled away and turned to leave.
"Morgana, we shall have a great feast to celebrate your return."
She nodded happily.
"I would like that."
The feast was full of people that had come to see the Lady Morgana happy and well and she sat next to Uther, bathing in the attention she was being shown.
Arthur was smiling and joking with Merlin and Gwen was standing off to the side incase Morgana needed anything.
Uther stood and the whole went into silence.
"I would just like to say how much it gladens my heart to have my ward sitting beside me this evening. For a year I have had to live without her and it pained me, but now she is back here with us, I see now how much she truly means to me, to the Lady Morgana!"
The rest of the hall toasted to her and Uther hugged her once again.
"I really have missed you." He told her.
She nodded and smiled warmily at him.
"And I, you."
It was an echo of what she had said to Merlin earlier last year but she meant it.
She really had missed being in Camelot. It was good to be back.
After the feast was over, Morgana went to bed.
She was tired and needed her sleep yet she also wanted to try out her magic. It was something she had learnt to deal with. She knew now that she could use magic without it having a dangerous effect on her as long as she used it wisely.
She waited untill everyone had gone to bed, before grabbing her cloak and slipping out of her chamber unnoticed or so she thought.
Merlin had been outside, just wanting to make sure that she really had stopped having those frightening dreams that caused her so much distress.
He watched her as she walked down the corridor and down the steps.
She was definitely going out of the palace but why?
Merlin kept a little distance between them as he followed her.
She walked out of the courtyard and headed towards the woods. Was she mad? At this time of night and after what had happened to her? Maybe it had given her some misplaced courage.
He followed her into the dark and found that she was getting deeper and deeper and the further she went, the darker it became.
He stopped when she did and hid behind a tree.
Morgana looked around and smiled when she saw a flame and her sister with it.
"Sister, how have you been?" Morgause asked her.
Morgana nodded.
"Good, thank you."
"Did you speak with Merlin?"
She paused and then nodded her head slowly.
"And he understands?"
Merlin frowned in confusion, what did Morgause know about all this?
Morgana then touched her sister's arm.
"I think he does but he still does not trust me." She added.
Morgause frowned at that and peered at her younger sister.
"How do you know?"
"He is always watching me, he stays outside my room untill I got to sleep and-"
she paused and looked straight at the tree he was hiding behind.
"-He follows me everywhere." She said loudly, so that he knew she was aware of his presence.
He stepped out of his hiding place and gave her and Morgause a wary glance.
Morgana shook her head.
"You still underestimate me, Merlin."
He didn't know what to say. He could have told her that he had followed her to make sure she was alright but he knew that was only the half of the truth.
He had feared that she was up to no good and by the looks of it, he was right.
"What is going on here, Morgana?" He asked nervously.
Morgana shrugged as though she didn't know what he was talking about.
"I'm not sure what you mean, Merlin. I was just out here talking to my sister, is that not allowed?" She asked innocently.
Merlin took a brave step towards Morgana and lowered his voice.
"She is the reason you put Camelot in danger. If it was not for her, you would not have been captured by those bandits for a year."
She laughed, a cruel, dark laugh.
"Captured? I cannot believe you bought into that." She laughed, shaking her head. Merlin stopped and stared at her.
"You... you were never captured... you were with her." He realized, turning to face Morgause who grinned and nodded.
"I am sorry to have decieved you, Merlin but I think now that we are even."
With an amber flash of her eyes, Merlin was thrown across the small space and smacked into a tree with a crack. He rolled over slowly when Morgause came over to him and flicked her wrist. He found himself paralyzed.
"Morgana knew you would follow her, Merlin, it is why you're here... this is where your sad life ends." She told him.
Morgause then came to crouch down in front of him.
"You tried to poison my sister so I think that it is only fair that you suffer the same fate."
She pulled out a small vial of blue liquid and Merlin's eyes widened. Aconite. He had heard Giaus mention it before.
"Hold his head back." Morgause said to her sister.
He watched helplessly as Morgana walked over and knelt beside him, yanking his head back sharply and holding his mouth open.
Merlin stared at her with pleading eyes and she only grinned.
He was wrong to think that they had brought the old Morgana back, she was dead, this was the Morgana that Kilgarah had warned hm about. She was only here now because of him.
Morgause tipped the liquid into his mouth and Morgana held his mouth shut but Merlin tried desparately to hold it in his mouth.
"Swallow." She snarled.
He just glared at her.
Morgana glanced up at Morgause.
"He's not swallowing."
Morgause stared into his blue eyes.
"There is no point in fighting this, Merlin. You are helpless, you have no one and even your old lover will not save you. You have changed her and she is better off without you, so just swallow it." She growled viciously.
Merlin glanced once more at Morgana and then gave in, swallowing the poison.
The same way he had made her.
Morgana pushed him onto his side and got to her feet.
Morgause was talking to her.
"The effect is not instant, he has a few hours but he will suffer just the same as you."
Morgana smiled and walked away, leaving Merlin to die all alone.
He could feel the poison flowing through him, wrapping around his heart and making it slow. He was going to die and it was all because of her.
He thought that she'd changed, that she'd realized what she had done and above all, that she had forgiven him for what he'd had to do. How wrong he had been but there had to be way to make this poison leave him...
He wished that he had kept his promise to Kilgarah and set him free but after Morgana had been poisoned, he could not bring himself to unleash the horror on Camelot that he was sure would follow, so he had put it off and ignored it whenever the great dragon called out to him.
Now he was wishing that he was here now, he could help, he was sure of it...
Everyone was doting on her and it was then that Morgana knew she would have no more trouble from the serving boy.
Merlin had at one time, meant a great deal to her, she had loved him more than she had ever loved anyone else but then he had to go and poison her and that all changed.
She knew that she could never poison somebody that she loved and because he had, she now knew just exactly how much she had meant to him in the first place.
She spent most of her time talking to Gwen and found that during her year of absence, her and Arthur had become very close and now she seemed not to deny it to her friend and mistress.
"At first I thought he was arrogant but I watched the pain he went through when he was searching for you and I comforted him and he did the same for me and well... he's not the big headed fool I thought he was."
Morgana smiled at these words.
"I am so happy for you, Gwen You and Arthur, you deserve each other." She meant it as well.
Gwen was no threat to her. Nothing could come of her and Arthur's relationship, even the future king knew that, and as everyone in the royal household knew, duty to your kingdom had to come before love.
As if reading her mind, Gwen echoed her thoughts.
"I know nothing can come of it but he said that when he becomes king, things could change and I am prepared to wait."
Morgana gave her maid servant a sympathetic smile.
"As long as you are not chasing something that you cannot possibly have."
Gwen looked at her friend.
"I have to believe, Morgana."
She nodded in agreement.
"Alright, we shall not dwell on it then."
A voice from outside caught her attention and she got up to check out the window.
It couldn't be...
Merlin! How was he still alive! That poison should have killed him! No magic could deflect that!
She was fuming and she tried to hide the hateful expression on her face. She went to the door without realizing she had just stormed past Gwen who frowned slightly at her.
"Morgana? Are you alright?"
"Yes I'm just going for a walk." She answered quickly.
Gwen let her go.
Merlin was walking down one of the corridors back to Gaius's room when she appeared from an alcove, grabbed his wrist and pulled him in with her.
He stared at her in shock and tried to pull his wrist free but she had a firm grip.
When she spoke, her voice was low and dangerous.
"I don't know how you managed to get free but I will tell you this, if you so much as breath a word to anyone about me, I will end your life." She snarled.
Merlin glared at her.
"And how would you do that?"
She grinned, a cold hard grin that made him shiver inwardly.
"I wouldn't have to do anything, could you imagine what Uther would do if he found out a simple servant had tried to poison his beloved ward?"
He stared at her.
"You have no proof."
"My word is enough for Uther these days." She shot back smartly.
He knew she was right, he didn't stand a chance against her but he had to try and make her see sense.
"You don't have to do this, Morgana. I have not told anyone that you have magic and I won't."
She rolled her eyes.
"I would have thought you would have been quicker on the uptake. I cannot wait for things to change, Merlin, I have to make them change. I have to hide who I am when if people knew that I had magic, can you imagine the power I would have?"
Merlin finally managed to pull away from her and back out of the alcove.
"You don't need the power, Morgana, things will change but you can't go about it like this."
She raised an eyebrow.
"And you would know... Merlin, if you value your life, stay out of my way." She warned before leaving him standing in the corridor, her words running through his head.
Author's Note: So, how are we enjoying it so far?
Of course we all know that things between Morgana and Merlin will only go from bad to worse but in what way I wonder? ;)