What have I done.... I must be sick..

Agent Hotchner had been torturing himself with these thoughts ever since he had made that grave mistake.

How could I... I touched a teenager.. I risked my job..my future...I touched Max.. How could he let me do that..how could I have let myself do that....if Spencer knew...if Haley knew..

If anyone knew...

Sonofabitch!! I can't believe that little bastard...he thinks he's so goddamn sly. I'll show him how things are really done. I'll show him how life really turns out for cowards like him.. He just got lucky.. He fucked up my plans..calling for his brother..he's going to pay. I'll show him and his team just how far they can fall....his brother wont be able to save him...and that Aaron Hotchner, he wont be there either... Gideon to, he can't escape another tragedy. He wont retire happily..I have control over this situation...

Jacob McDowell was fuming when he entered the coffee shop. Just like any other psychologically compromised individual, one experience had managed to set off his emotional time bomb in a matter of hours. He had spent the entire night thinking, pondering, plotting. He needed coffee if he was going to get his way with the boy.

He received many stares as he waited in line a bit impatiently. He wasn't aware of the psychotic undertone that drifted quietly beneath his plain face. The girl ahead offered the receipt to her customer and thanked him, then turning her large hazel eyes to McDowell. Her facial expression changed immediately, as if she was overtaken with a sudden worry.

"What can I get for you Sir?" she asked politely, her eyebrows upturning in a shy manner. Her hair matched her eyes, a golden brown. They reminded Jacob of..of...someone. Large, honey colored pupils encased with long, youthful lashes. Max.

"Sir?" she repeated. He noticed the softness of her voice. It was irritating. She sounded like a child.

"Uh...Sir-

"I'll have a..a large coffee."

"Milk or cream?"

"No."

"Just black?"

Jacob stared at her harshly for a few seconds, giving her a "what the hell else would I mean" look. The young man working the espresso machine behind her turned and raised a suspicious brow.

"We need to look there now!" Hotch spoke loudly, gritting his teeth. "It's just too strange, it doesn't-

"Hotch relax, I've got the search warrant." Emily said, waving the papers and smacking them down on the desk before heading for the door. JJ looked concerned.

"He's right, we do need to have a look, evidence is coming up in odd places." Agent Prentiss confirmed.

Spencer Reid poked his head in through the conference room door, eyes wide with concern. "That woman that he killed...she was the husband of that other lawyer he faced in 2006?"

"Yes." Hotch replied. "She was a gentle and soft spoken woman. Apparently she refused to stand up to her husband when he continuously beat her. If McDowell really is our unsub, then I'm guessing that he's the one who saw her weakness. She was beaten to death..."

Reid continued, "So you're right then Hotch. Being a lawyer is the perfect opportunity for a person like that to gain control and power. After all, McDowell is known for his incredible harshness. People often use him for criminal trials because he's not afraid to get his hands dirty. He'll say what others would never dream of considering."

"I sure hope this doesn't involve your brother." Emily added with a concerned expression. "He did really seem to take a dig at Max in a very short amount of time."

I'm hoping not.. "He's at the university right now..he should be...he should be fine. I'll give him a call anyway."

"Do that." Hotch nodded sternly. Spencer thought he saw fear flicker across his stone set face.

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!

Screams flowed like a deathly wind, piercing through the coffee shop's glass windows. Passerby's stopped to stare, and then draw closer, or run...

"W-What the hell did you do!!!" the espresso kid screamed hysterically, pressing his back against the counter and staring in horror at his female coworker who now lay crumpled upon the yellow linoleum tile, blood pooling around her head at an uncomfortable rate.

Ba Bum Ba Bum Ba Bum Ba Bum went Jacob's heart as the gun in his hands shook. He lowered it, realizing what he had done. Too long! Dumb teenager... He had waited 20 damn minutes for his coffee. Something had gone wrong behind the counter. The stupid girl kept rushing around and apologizing...apologizing in that tiny...weak voice as she cleaned up the mess and attempted to fix everything. She even offered it to him for free. What a stupid girl. You don't give in that easily. You had no backbone...probably better off dead.

"Alright..we have to make it quick and precise."

Reid nodded at Agent Hotchner and began to participate in clearing through anyplace in McDowell's sinlessly clean home. The inside was covered, predictably, with very few photos, many law related books, and a very no nonsense decorum. Agent Hotchner pulled opened a drawer and eyed an address book, which reminded him of his priorities.

"Reid, have you given your brother a call?"

"Oh!" the young Agent gasped, realizing that he had put it off for at least 15 minutes. "Sorry Sir, I will. But...if I may ask, why is it such a priority? My brother is still in school, and he's taking exams. His phone is off to. I highly doubt that he's in any danger. Just a feeling I have."

"Reid."

"Yes Sir."

Hotch sent Reid scampering off into the kitchen to make the phone call. I hope that sudden fit he had the other night isn't relevant..

The outer shell of McDowell's home seemed to be in perfect condition; spotless, organized, and innocent. The inside, however, differed slightly. Certain papers and items were arranged in such a confusing manner within their places, that the team couldn't possibly begin to sort them. They would have to go on a whim. This man obviously had come up with some sort of bizarre system..probably for security.

"Look.." JJ spoke after a while of rummaging. She withdrew a series of black, spiral bound notebooks tucked carefully underneath 3 binders within the desk cabinet of McDowell's home office.

"Here, go quick but be sure not to miss anything." she instructed, passing out the specimens to Hotch and Emily.

"We could use Reid's speed reading right about now." Emily sighed, blocking out the conversation coming from the other room and letting her mind absorb the writings. Her eyes widened immediately.

I really hurt myself this time. My hands were bloody and my knuckles split. For a spineless woman, she sure had a tough skull...

Meanwhile, in the next room, Spencer Reid was attempted to connect with someone at the University who could give him to Max.

"Well..well yes I know but..."

He groaned deeply, tired of being interrupted by the impatient secretary.

"He should be in Building C, level 2, room 5A. He's taking an exam...could you just make sure that he's alri- Yes, I know how important exams are, I went there to- M'am, I'm with the FBI, please just do- Wait, what?...............Oh my god..."

Emily was sickened by the words that she was reading. The man had jotted down several of his nasty doings down on these sheets of paper, like a diary. Who would do this...who would take the time.. She glanced around and noticed that she was not the only one experiencing difficulty doing her job. Her stomach lurched slightly as the realization set in. Our unsub....McDowell.

Prentiss and Hotch jumped as JJ let out a strangled gasp, the notebook slipping from her trembling hands and hitting the floor as she backed away, chest heaving. "O-Oh my....oh my god....oh my god...no.."

The other two Agents pounced on the material immediately, practically shouting in question.

"No...no.." JJ pressed herself against the wall and covered her mouth in horror and surprise. The terrifying words still swam mercilessly through her mind; her vision swayed.

....haven't seen something this good in a very long time. Max, the one I mentioned before, he's perfect. I know so much about him already, it's impossible to pace myself. I know it's selfish to keep him all to myself, but I don't feel like sharing. I would like to do this one all on my own. You should see him. He looks like a little doe or something; the most fragile creature I've ever seen. I wonder what he looks like when he's been roughed up. God knows anyone would want to beat up a little bitch like him. The epitome of spineless. As I saw a few days ago, when I cornered him in the garage, he's very easy to unsettle. All I had to do was drill him about his mother, and I think he almost cried. Little bastard has no place in the FBI. Oh boy will this be a good one..

Emily, wide eyed, left Hotch's side and went to comfort JJ, who was still in a state of shock. "I never thought..."

"I know...I..." Agent Hotchner spoke quietly, mouth hanging slightly ajar. He was speechless. That...bastard...

"Guys!" came a frantic cry from the kitchen. Reid rushed in, his face paler than usual. "I called...I just c-called the University. They said that Max was taken from his class by an unknown man in a business suit. H-He called him to the office on an emergency and..t-they left! W-What's going on??"

"Reid...Reid I." Hotch stuttered. "McDowell is after your brother..he wrote about it in his journals along with the other victims. We need to call Garcia."

The Agent started unexpectedly when his phone buzzed. Withdrawing it, he realized that Garcia had beaten him to it, and turned away from Reid's heartbreaking expression to take the call. Please don't let anything happen to my boy..

"Yeah Garcia."

"Sir, we've just gotten a call about a holdup in a coffee shop on South Main, downtown. A shot was fired within the building, nobody is leaving, and they're assuming it's a hostage situation."

"They?"

"The police are already there Sir. They've identified the man inside as...McDowell."

A deep silence hovered, and Hotch could hear his fellow agents attempting to comfort one another in a sophisticated manner.

"Garcia, tell them we'll be down in a flash. Also, look up any information on some possible close friends or allies of McDowell's."

"Sir, is everything alright? What's going on..? You don't sound good."

Another silence settled over the phone connection, and it took a few extra seconds for Hotch to verbalize the situation.

"It's Max...we have reason to believe that he's in danger."

"Oh...Oh..no..." Garcia's voice trailed off into an unsettling pause.

"Call me soon."

"Y-Yes Sir."

Agent Hotchner hung up and explained the apparent hostage situation taking place right then. JJ, Emily, and Reid all groaned.

"In the journal entry it mentioned sharing." Emily spoke, attempting to keep a strong attitude. "Are you telling me that whoever "picked up" Max is in this to..? Another unsub?"

"It's only reasonable." Hotch replied, gathering the evidence and heading for the door. "We've got to move quick now, this could be a time-sensitive situation."

"Everyone..just keep quiet." Jacob McDowell spoke in his stern voice. He shut the cellphone and slipped it back into the pocket of his crisp slacks, smirking gently. Bet no one expected a guy dressed like me to pull a gun.. Jacob began having second thoughts. It was all too much. I shouldn't have killed her...it wasn't worth it..damn. That little intern sure is messing up my life... Jacob just couldn't stop thinking about Max; feeding his anger. I feel so out of control..

"P-please..Sir, at least let my daughter leave-

"Ahem?" McDowell shot back, raising a sharp eyebrow and shaking his head at the whimpering hostage. "I believe I told everyone to SHUT UP. You'll all be out soon enough, so just hold your damn horses. All you have to do is be quiet."

Hurry up Bird..

Max pressed his knees together and wrung his hands, shaking violently in the passenger seat and keeping his face turned towards the tinted window. He watched as he was driven leisurely past other unsuspecting cars and pedestrians. He had tried mouthing words to many of them, only to realize that it was a hopeless task no matter how hard he tried. No one could see him. No would could help him.

"You better not be thinking of opening that door." the man beside him spoke quite easily. "I've got the child lock on, so you can just relax boy."

Max glanced at him through his peripheral vision, opening his dry mouth to speak.

"W-where are you taking me.."

The man replied again, with incredible ease. "Well, I've just gotten a call from my friend. He lost it and killed a girl in a coffee shop, because he's been thinking about you so much. It's now a hostage situation, so I'm going to drive us there, hold a gun to your pretty head, and buy him time so he can get to the car. Then...uh, well, we'll be set."

"S-set?"

"Yep. Jacob feels like it's time for another...eh..expenditure."

"Who's..w-who's J-jacob?"

"Jacob? Jacob McDowell?"

Max cringed and stared at the man, mouth half open. He had hoped to god that this man wasn't in league with that crazy lunatic lawyer that had attempted to kidnap him in the night. I should have just told Spencer...I'm such a fool.

"But..b-but what did I do??"

Bird was picking up on the intense fear emanating from the boy, and laughed, shaking his head.

"Just be quiet kid."

Hotch drove the black SUV like a maniac, silencing the other agents who sat strapped into the car. Reid was terrified, JJ was horrified, Emily was sick with worry, and Agent Hotchner was fuming. The man's heart was battling fear and anger, and it was very uncomfortable. Please don't let this happen...please..I didn't mean it..I know I shouldn't have done what I did, but don't take him away from his brother. Let him be okay, please.. Don't punish us in this way..

"Good, Gideon is already here." Aaron said before stopping the car and jumping out. The three federal agents withdrew their guns, already in their FBI bullet-proof vests, and began to converse with the police officers. Sirens flashed from the stationed cars, and countless firearms were held pointed at the building of conflict. People stared from within their apartment windows across the street with confused looks.

"Do we have SWAT?" Agent Gideon asked franticly.

"No Sir, but they should be on there way."

"Well get them here fast!" the man yelled, heart pounding. "I don't like this." He took a fast walk over to Agent Hotchner.

"Hotch, I don't like this. There's no SWAT team, no sharpshooters. I've been watching McDowell, he's too comfortable. He's waiting for something, I know it."

"Waiting for something..?"

Spencer Reid pinched the bridge of his nose and exhaled, trying to process what he had just overheard. McDowell..too comfortable...waiting.. Max..two unsubs..no, it couldn't be. Max was smart. He would never go off with a random stranger, especially being associated with the FBI. But..it was the only thing that made sense. It was the only thought that stuck.

"Guys!" Reid yelled, pushing past an officer with a terrified expression. 'I think he's going to use Max. Remember the "we" part of the journal?? Two unsubs? That's why-

-why he took Max.." Hotch finished, clenching his fists and staring at the asphalt beneath his feet. Gideon was equally traumatized by the realization. It was all coming too quickly; too quickly to fix anything.

"Max was kidnapped??" the senior Agent gasped, eyes wide.

"Yes, I was about to tell you. We had just found evidence of McDowell plotting against Max when Reid called and discovered that his brother had taken off with a man in a plain business suit in a so called emergency. He was in the middle of his Sociology final exam. Office secretary said she didn't recognize him."

"Oh my-

Suddenly, there came shouting from along the perimeter lines, and everyone turned.

"Excuse me!! Stop the car, stop that car!! Do not cross this line, STOP THE CAR!!" a sergeant was yelling, waving his arms at an approaching dark vehicle with tinted windows. The car then came to a halt and killed the engine before any further disturbance was made.

"Alright boy, you're going to crawl over my lap, and get out of the car first, understand? I need to make it clear to the police that we're not fooling around here. You best be behaved until this is over, and no struggling or you'll regret it." the man ordered.

Max stared longingly out the front window at the agents that seemed so far away. If I could just run... He saw JJ. He saw Emily. He saw Gideon, Hotch, and his brother. They were all staring at the car, so worried, so horrified. I've caused so much trouble..

"Hey!" the man repeated, socking Max in the shoulder and jolting him viscously. "We don't have all day."

The young intern sat like a deer caught in the headlights, knuckles white as he squeezed his own hands together. His muscles weren't responding to the messages his brain was sending. Come on...move....get out of the car..

"Who are you??" the cops called, trudging over to the small side-parking lot beside the coffee shop.

"STAY BACK!!" the man yelled after opening his door and firing a pistol into the air. The groups outside immediately backed off, resuming their positions behind the police cars and turning half the firearms on the car instead of the hostage situation.

The black haired, green eyed man who sat beside Max whispered a message into his phone and then inserted it back into the glove box, turning to his passenger and staring impatiently. The boy was stiff shouldered and wide eyed, and he wasn't moving.

"Goddammit!" the kidnapper grunted, grabbing Max by his shoulders, yanking him over the middle car compartment, and onto his lap upon his stomach. The boy yelped and rolled headfirst out of the car door, hitting the gravel ground on his back and scrambling to his feet. The police wasted no time in cocking their guns and yelling commands of "stop" and "hold it right there".

"NO!!" came a sudden cry from behind the line of federal automobiles. "DON'T SHOOT!!" The young man was relieved to see his brother drawing nearer. He was explaining something to everyone. Please...tell them what's happening Spencer..

Max whimpered as his captor grabbed him by the back of his pony tail and yanked him upward. He felt a strong arm readjust itself around his thin neck and cold metal press to the side of his pounding temple. Then he spoke.

"I'm here to retrieve my fellow lawyer!" the dark haired man called loudly. "You will all lower your weapons and allow him to escort himself to this car, and then we three will drive away without any further assistance. I am warning you all now, that if these orders are not taken into immediate action, or if we are followed by any sort of blatant or undercover law enforcement, I will blow this 17 year old boy from here to high heaven!"

The crowd of agents, officers, and sergeants whispered quietly among themselves in deep confrontation, then finally dropped all firearms. The whimpering of the innocent teenager was tugging at all of their hearts, especially one.

How could I have missed this.

"Oh my god...Hotch, Hotch what do we do??" Reid whispered frantically, bottom lip trembling.

I was right there. Right there when it happened.

"Hotch! Gideon! What do we do??" McDowell emerged from the coffee shop, armed, with a reluctant wave from the officers.

I should have known that there was something special...something wrong...something sick about that man.

"Ssh Reid!" Gideon hushed. "Stay calm. We're going to fix this. He wont get away with this, we just need to stay calm. Trust me Spencer."

I could have helped you...I could have done my job. And instead..I decided to give you your first kiss?

"Thanks guys." came a distant, familiar voice as McDowell strode leisurely out of the hostage situation and directly to the waiting transportation. Everyone scowled in disbelief.

"He can't do this.." Agent Hotchner whispered, gazing upon his worst nightmare. Max is a fragile creature...this can't be happening..not him.

"Good job Bird."

"Hurry up and get in the car Jacob."

"P-please don't." Max begged as McDowell opened the passenger door and this so called, "Bird" attempted to drag him to the backseat. The young intern was losing it.

"SPENCER!!!" he screamed, fighting back with everything as he was wrestled into the backseat. "HOTCH!!!"

Bird cursed and covered the boy's mouth, shoving him through the door and into the back.

"Dammit." Hotch breathed, lurching forward on a reflex and found himself being held back by Gideon. Reid was crouched low to the ground, knees bent, and covering his face. All felt helpless, but it that last, desperate plead that seemed to send the team into an emotional spiral.

"PLEASE!!!!!!!"

The car's engine sounded, and all hope seemed to just tear off down the road... The hostages fled from the building, grateful to see the wide open sky, and Hotchner swallowed a sob, praying to god that he would have the chance to remember Max by more than a short, fling of ecstasy...a mistake...

Sweet boy....