Wow, you guys I'm so sorry it's taken so long to get this chapter up! I actually had this one almost finished, but ended up getting a new computer and losing it in the transfer… oops! So, I tried to remember what I had written as best as possible haha I also wanted to say, because I don't think I have yet, thank you so much for all the follows and lovely reviews! I really do hope you guys are enjoying the story. Please let me know if there is anything you want to see in upcoming chapters. Cheers!
Cosima and Delphine walk hand in hand through the front doors of the hospital, taking in the whitewashed walls and smell of disinfectant. Being in a hospital today was not their first choice, but at least they were there together which offered a small reprieve from the inevitable gloominess of the day.
They make their way to the elevator that was just around the corner. Cosima leans forward to press the up arrow and the two watch in silence as the numbers above the door slowly tick down until landing on one. A few people step out of the elevator in silence, but they were the only ones to enter.
Delphine presses the button for the seventh floor and the two women make their way to the back wall, leaning up against it with heavy sighs.
"Thanks for coming with me, Delphine." Cosima's gaze is fixed on their intertwined hands.
"Bien sur, ma cherie." The taller woman bends down to meet the brunette's lips and they share a soft embrace. Cosima pulls away slowly and reaches for the emergency stop button by the doors. "What are—" but before Delphine can finish, the brunette has her pinned against the back wall, kissing her from the nape her neck until their lips touch again. "Cosima…"
"We're early. My appointment isn't for another half hour." The brunette's hands make their way under Delphine's shirt and up her back; caressing every inch of skin they can reach. A small moan escapes between the blonde's lips and she pulls Cosima in tighter, their bodies flush against each other. Delphine pulls away just a few inches, making sure not to loosen her grip on the shorter woman.
"Cosima. What's going on?"
"What? Can't we have a little fun?" She smiles and leans in for another forceful kiss. Delphine obliges, but pulls away once more.
"Ma cherie…"
"Okay, okay." Cosima drops her head and tries to pull away, but Delphine won't have it.
"Non, non." The blonde refuses to let her go. Holding her tight with one arm, she reaches up and caresses the brunette's cheek, tilting her head up so she can see into her wavering brown eyes.
"It's just… this isn't fun, Delphine. What you're about to see. It's bleak and sad and I know I wanted you here, but like, I don't want you to see me like that."
"Oh, Cosima." A small smile dances across her face as her free hand makes its way to the back of the brunette's neck and pulls her in for a gentle kiss. "Nothing could change how I feel about you. No matter what state I see you in. My love isn't skin deep and I would hope you don't think that of me." She drops her head as her hands rest around Cosima's waist, maintaining a tight grip.
"I totally don't think that. I just, it's my own insecurity of looking… broken. Weak."
"You are not weak or broken."
"But I feel like I am!" Cosima finally pulls away and throws her arms in the air in defeat, resting a hand on her forehead as she turns her back to Delphine.
The blonde sighs heavily and pushes off of the back wall of the elevator, her arms seeking refuge around Cosima's waist and meeting no objection. She pulls the smaller woman in tight resting her chin on the brunette's shoulder.
"You can be all those things with me, ma cherie. If that's how you feel. You don't have to pretend like this is easy. I know it's not." Her grip tightens and she places a gentle kiss on the exposed skin between Cosima's neck and shoulder. Tears start to run down the brunette's cheeks and her shoulders start to shake. Delphine slowly turns her around so they are face to face. Her hands softly cradling Cosima's cheeks and wiping away her tears with her thumbs. Their lips brush and Delphine can feel the small woman begin to relax.
"Thank you, Delphine." She smiles and kisses the blonde with a bit more vigor. Delphine smiles, pulling Cosima in tighter, reciprocating the kiss and reaching out to start the elevator up again.
"Are you ready?" She says, with sympathy touching the corner of her eyes.
"As ready as I'll ever be." Cosima flashes a small smile and the two turn to face the doors as they, once again, watch the numbers change.
"Ugh, I hate needles." Cosima's eyes are shut tight and her head is turned to the side as a nurse inserts an IV. Delphine let's out a small chuckle and squeezes the brunette's hand in reassurance.
This room is more colorful than the lobby. The walls are painted various colors with different inspirational quotes stenciled on them. Windows along the back expose a beautiful view over the city. Although clouds cover the sky, the snow hasn't stopped falling of days and it makes the room a bit easier to handle. The chairs are aligned in a half circle facing outside, about half are occupied. Most of the patients are older, as Cosima expected. Not very many people her age tend to be in organ failure. Everyone was in their own world talking with their families, friends, partners. Cosima and Delphine were no different.
"You're so cute when you're flustered." Delphine laughed and leaned in to kiss Cosima as the nurse left.
"Hey! Needles are terrifying!"
"Says the woman with multiple tattoos."
"That's different."
"How is that different?!"
"It just is!" The two laugh at their ridiculous conversation. Hands intertwined, they share in a quiet moment of smiles and soft touches.
Cosima is finally able to relax. Delphine has that effect on her. Every touch, smile, kiss, makes her melt and forget everything that's on her mind. She becomes engulfed in another world, one where it's only the two of them. She's constantly lost in the blondes eyes. Searching for an explanation behind her love, care, and kindness.
The two settle into their seats and Cosima pulls a deck of cards out of her purse, but before they get the chance to start their game, an older woman leans over to them.
"Vous êtes très jeune pour être si malade." A sad small touches her lips. Cosima, really only knowing the French that Delphine speaks to her, looks back in confusion.
"I'm sorry, I don't—" But Delphine explains before the brunette can finish.
"Oui. Cosima, she said, 'You are very young to be so sick.'" The smile on her face was almost identical to the other woman's.
"Oh, yeah." She chuckles. "I just thought I would get ahead of the game." She's looking between the older woman and Delphine, unsure if she'll understand.
"Quite the sense of humor." The woman's accent was thick, but still understandable. Cosima sighed in relief, happy to not use her partner as a translator for the entire conversation. "And also, I aim to guess, very far from home."
"You could say that. I'm just taking in some different sights and trying to work in a new environment." A genuine smile bounces around her lips.
"You have certainly come to the right place, but I would think such a thing as dialysis would put a damper on your stay." The woman reaches across the space dividing their seats and places a comforting hand on Cosima's arm.
"You're definitely right, but I suppose you could say that my work and this," she waves around the room, "go hand in hand. I'm a writer and this is kind of my next book."
"Well, I applaud your courage to share such an unfortunate circumstance with the world." At that, Delphine squeezes Cosima's hand in an offer of comfort and praise at the brunette's strength and leans in closer to quickly brush her hand along the other's cheek. "And it looks like you have found someone to help you along the way." The older woman smiles wide and meets Delphine's eyes.
"I certainly have." Cosima turns to face the blonde.
"Oui, but I think I am the lucky one." The taller woman leans in for a quick kiss.
"It makes the world of a difference. I lost my love not too long ago. I know I wouldn't be here now without him." Her smile fades and her hand leaves Cosima's arm. "So, don't stop fighting for each other. It goes both ways."
"I don't plan on going anywhere." Cosima says with certainty.
"And I don't plan on letting her." Delphine follows. "We didn't get you're name?"
"Ah, je suis Rose."
"Enchante, Rose. I am Delphine and this is Cosima."
"Enchante." She smiles and settles back into her seat. The two woman notice for the first time that she is alone and they both get a quick vision of Cosima sitting in this very seat by herself. They shrug off the feeling, knowing that that will never be the case.
The brunette turns back to Delphine.
"You better not die on me." She whispers.
"Well, I do plan on going first, but that won't be for a while." She chuckles and caresses Cosima's hand. "And the same goes for you."
"Did this just turn into a race?"
"Mon Dieu! I hope not!" The two laugh, trying to make light of the situation, and turn back to their cards. Cosima shuffles and deals and they spend the rest of their time talking, flirting, and being present rather than worrying about the future.