I hadn't left the perimeter of the back yard since the day they brought me here. I took a deep breath and I entered the tree line. I walked to the river where Jacob and I first met and sat at the river bank. After a moment, Jacob appeared and sat next to me.
"I thought we agreed you would stay in the house." Jacob said in his emotionless voice. I couldn't even look at him.
"I needed some fresh air." I told him while I stared at the water. He huffed angrily.
"Why do you have to make this so difficult?" He asked me but I had a feeling it was a rhetorical question.
"I'm not the one making things hard on everybody." I snapped at him. He huffed angrily.
"There are hikers around here. You shouldn't be out here on your own. You can hurt someone." He said angrily. I felt my anger rise.
"I'm not a danger to anyone and you know it! I lost control once. Its not going to happen again." I told him in a hiss.
"You can't guarantee that." He told me. My head snapped towards him this time and I glared at him angrily.
"Yes I can! What happened with Seth was… well it was me not knowing how to act around a man. I had never been out with a man before so I forgot myself for a moment. I was careless but I won't let that happen again." I told him. I saw the hurt in his eyes again. He looked away.
"That oversight could have cost Seth his life." He said in a softer tone.
"I know, which is why I will stay here for as long as you see fit. I know what I did was wrong and, even though Seth forgave me, there should be some kind of consequence. I could have killed him if I hadn't stopped myself. Losing control like that was one of my biggest fears but now that it happened, I am able to face it. I will pay my sentence but I won't let you treat me like a monster anymore." I told him. Jacob sighed and rubbed his face as if he were trying to rub away some emotion from it. He sat next to me and looked out at the water. After a moment, he finally spoke again.
"Do you like Seth?" He asked me. His question threw me off guard. I thought about his question.
"Seth is very nice and I get along with him. I only thought I was attracted to him but I don't know anymore. Things are different between us. He feels different." I confessed. He turned to look at me.
"And how is that?" He asked me. I shrugged.
"I've been on this world for 10 years but I have only been an adult, three out of those 10 years. I don't know how I feel. I've never liked someone romantically so its hard to tell." I told him.
"I thought the other hybrid asked you to marry him?" He questioned. I looked at him surprised.
"Wolves share our thoughts." He explained and I nodded, remembering mom mention that.
"I wanted to love him but it just didn't feel that way. That's why I said no to Nahuel. I also wanted to see more of the world and experience more so that I could figure it out." I told him. Jacob just looked at me and I could see a hint of concern in his eyes.
"How long were you planning to stay with Charlie?" Jacob asked me.
"I'm supposed to start Stanford in August. If he improved by then I would have gone to school as planned but if he needed me for longer, then I was planning to postpone school until the following year." I told him. He turned and gazed at me.
"You were planning to be around that many humans, not knowing if you can control yourself?" He asked me.
"That's why I came to the states so early. I was living in a condo on my own. I was spending several hours a day in public until I felt sure I wouldn't lose control in a classroom. I had only lived in the apartment for a month before I came here." I told him.
"Your family is probably worried sick." Jacob said. I nodded.
"I know. I haven't contacted them since you captured me. Mom must be out of her mind by now. She wasn't taking the news of Charlie well at all." I told him. He looked away.
"That's the choice she made." He said angrily. I felt a pang of hurt in my own chest.
"She was never meant to be with you Jacob. The fact that I exist proves it. I'm like their miracle. Dad told me once that I was the one thing of beauty that came out of the darkness they were all condemned to. Like a single rose in a sea of thorns. I wasn't created. I was born into this world. I was meant to be here for a reason which means that you can't punish her forever." I told him. He turned to me again but I was surprise to see sadness in his expression.
"I know." He told me.
"So why are you still trying to hurt her? Why won't you let her see her father? Why do you want to punish us so badly? Are you punishing me and my father because you didn't imprint on her?" I asked him as the tears formed in my eyes at the idea of him imprinting. It was even more irritating than him still loving my mother. He just stood there and looked at me surprised.
"You know about imprinting?" He asked me surprised.
"Of course I do. Mom told me all about it. Its how your wolf recognizes your mate. You look into the woman's eyes and you just know. You spend the rest of your life adoring her… It sounds beautiful. I just don't know why you don't go looking for that instead of pinning for something that wasn't meant to be." I told him. He looked into my eyes for a moment. Its almost like he was trying to tell me something with his eyes but I didn't know what. I saw the uncertainly in his eyes as if he were trying to make a decision. Then he took something out of his pocket.
"Call them." He said handing me his phone. I looked at his phone in surprise. I was completely baffled. He leaned into me and put the phone in my hand.
"Let them know you're with Charlie. Tell them I said its ok for you to see him until its time for you to go to school." He told me.
"What? Really?!" I asked surprised and confused. I felt the tears forming in my eyes but for a completely different reason. He nodded and I jumped on him to hug him. He caught me easily and I kissed his cheek.
"Thank you Jacob." I said softly, trying to control my tears. He nodded. I thought he would let me go but he didn't.
"You can practice being around us and your grandfather. If you do well, I'll allow you to go Stanford." He told me.
"Really? You'd let me go?" I asked him surprised.
"You're immortal. I can't keep you here for all eternity. You need to learn how to be around humans and I might as well be the one to teach you." He told me softly. I looked into his eyes and I felt the sudden urge to kiss him. I took a step back before I did something foolish and he let me go. I smiled at him grateful and quickly called my mother.
"Hello?" An empty voice answered.
"Momma?" I said hesitantly.
"Renesmee!" She exclaimed, her voice full of emotion. I heard the voices of my family in the background.
"Baby where are you? Why haven't you called us?" She said quickly.
"I'm in Forks momma. I came to see Charlie and make sure he was ok." I told them.
"What?! Renesmee, that's dangerous!" I heard her say at the same time daddy told grandpa to call Seth.
"Its ok momma. Jacob said I could stay. He knows who I am and he said it was ok for me to visit Charlie and help out." I told them.
"Oh my God!" She said.
"Renesmee." Daddy said quickly. "I don't want you there unsupervised. Its too dangerous. Jacob cannot be trusted." Dad said. I saw Jacob tense and growl slightly. I put my hand on his arm and he relaxed slightly. We looked at each other and I could see the turmoil brewing.
"He won't hurt me." I assured my dad while I looked into Jacob's eyes assuring him as well that I trusted his word.
"You don't know that!" Dad yelled over the phone making me jump and break my eye contact with Jacob. He began to shake as soon as our contact broke and he took the phone from me.
"I'm not a monster you fucking leech! I'm a protector! The girl is half human and Charlie's only living relative. She's here under my protection and surveillance. She is the only one of you allowed here do you understand?!" Jacob yelled at the phone.
"Jacob?" I heard my mom's voice. Jacob tensed and hesitated for a moment.
"I'm sorry Bells. Your kind isn't welcome here but your daughter can stay. That's the best I can do for you." He told her is a softer tone than the one he used with my father. I could still hear the tension in his voice, though.
"Jacob…" I heard momma say in a sob. Jacob looked at me with a sad expression. My tears finally trickled down my cheeks from hearing my mom's heartbroken voice.
Jacob touched my face and wiped my tears away with his fingertips. He had never touched me like that before. I realized that I probably reminded him of my mother and hearing her voice must have made him see her when he looked at me. I swallowed the knot forming in my throat at the idea that he only touched me because of her.
"No one will hurt her. I swear it." Jacob told her in the most human voice I ever heard from him and then he hung up the phone.
"You will have a wolf with you anytime you are around humans." He said handing me his phone. "At least until we can make sure you're in control. Just call Seth or let me know and one of us will take you to town or wherever you want to go." He told me.
"But how will I call you if I have your phone?" I asked him.
"I'll be in the house from now on. You won't be a prisoner but if I'm going to take responsibility for you then I am not letting you out of my sight." He said in a serious tone. I smirked at him.
I was surprised by how much his voice had changed. He almost sounded like a normal human. It was like some weight had lifted off him and then I realized it was probably because of my mom. I felt a sharp pain in my chest. He frowned at me.
"Are you ok?" He asked me. I nodded, not trusting my voice. I sat back down and he sat closer to me.
We stared at the river for almost an half an hour before I finally spoke.
"I wonder what it would have been like growing up here." I said aloud. He stiffened slightly. I looked at him and smiled to let him know it was ok.
"I know why you made us leave. Mom was a newborn and you had just lost her. I just wish things could have been different. Who knows? Maybe if we stayed, you would have found some way to forgive them. Maybe I would have grown up with a pack full of friends." I said almost teasing. He nodded.
"Maybe. What was your childhood like?" He asked me.
"I grew up on isle Esme. It's a private island off the coast of Brazil. Its was a small island but it was home. I played outside with my aunts every day. My uncles taught me all kinds of sports and combat skills. My family all pitched in to home school me and teach me new things every day. Once I was a little older, I was allowed off the island with my family. We explored all of South America. That's how we discovered the other hybrids. The sisters were kinda mean but Nahuel was kind. He would stay with us for a few months every year to keep me company. He was a human drinker though. He tried our way but he had a hard time with it after 150 years of human blood. He was my friend though sometimes I felt like he was just waiting for me to grow up so he could be with me." I told him.
"But you didn't have any human friends?" Jacob asked me. I shook my head.
"No. I learned about humans through books and television. I did spend time doing volunteer work with my grandparents but they warned me not to get close to any humans so I never really made a friend." I told him.
"Why didn't they want you close to humans? What changed?" He asked me.
"I was on donated blood growing up. Grandpa got it from the local hospitals. After I was done developing, my family moved me to an animal blood diet. I've been able to handle living off animals for over a year but then again, I haven't been around humans 24/7. That's why grandpa set me up with so much donated blood when I moved here." I told him. Jacob seemed a little tense after my confession. I took his hand to get his attention.
"They trusted me. The blood was only to help me stay in control but I didn't actually need it until I met Seth. You wolves are supposed to smell like dogs but your scents…" I sighed and shook my head.
"Your wolves have the most alluringly delicious smell I ever scented. Yours in particular." I confessed. "No offense." I added. He cocked his head to the side and looked at me.
"My scent?" He asked. I nodded.
"Maybe its because you're the alpha but your scent is the most powerful and mouthwatering smell I ever encountered. That's why I know I can do this Jacob. I would never hurt you." I told him. He stroked his thumb over the skin of my hand and I felt a shiver run through my body. He got up and helped me to my feet.
"We should head back." Jacob explained as I got up. I nodded. It was almost dinner time and I was hungry.