David Karofsky vs the World

by ShonenOkami

A Scott Pilgrim-ish take on the Kurtofsky ship. Set after "Prom Queen". Guaranteed smut, humor, angst, and shoryukens. Karofsky finds an opportunity to win Kurt's heart. Kurt has forgiven him, but his friends aren't so forgiving or trusting. Total AU

10. Read the BLEEPing Manual!

I'm baaack, fellow pirates! I'm so sorry I've kept you all waiting! Yes, yes, I know, shame on me for letting you worry for so long...But now I am gonna make it up to you with this extra-long chapter, chock full of what makes this story epic! I know I've said that I was gonna try to get a chapter out at least every 3-5 days, but this is starting to become a hardship. That, and motivation hasn't exactly been at an all-time high. But enough about my woes, I'm doing this for you, the readers whom I love oh-so dearly! Thank you to those that have been submitting reviews so far, a lot of you have been a large factor in my motivation with your kind words! Recently, I was told that this fic ranks up with the legendary Kurtofsky fics such as Rewrite and KIMS...You can imagine how honoured I am to even hear that. Really, from the bottom of my proud pirate heart, thank you! :-)

And once again and always, I do not own Glee or any other geeky mentions that I make in this story. If I did, Glee would be rated TV-MA and would probably be put on a primetime slot for something like Cinemax or Showtime, away from the sensitive eyes of soccer moms. And also, if Max Adler weren't straight and taken, I'd claim him as my boyfriend!

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David Karofsky vs. the World

Chapter 9: Nume ayfya, sxwang! Or laD QIp pIqaD! Or Nayt dra vilgehk syhiym!

David: Level 15

HP: 1073

SP: 266

Note: He's not fully awake right now…

"Ow! What the fuck, you psycho lesbian?" HP: -15 (1058) I rub at the tiny bump the thrown stapler left on my head; it really makes me wonder how much she can fit in that pocket dimension she calls her hair...

"You're falling asleep on me, you weak-ass sodomite! I didn't offer my services just so you can catch up on your much needed beauty sleep! If I catch you shutting your eyes again, prepare for a nice dose of Lima Heights Adjacent!" Santana got up in my face and brandished a bamboo shinai, poking it under my chin. I shook my head to wake myself up a bit more; we were standing in the outfield of the school's baseball field, it was pretty chilly out and still kinda dark, my feet starting to go numb from the cold dew starting to soak through the worn soles of my shoes.

"*yawn*…Can we just get on with the training, minus the lip, Lesbo-Wan Kenobi?"

Santana swung the shinai at my face, whistling through the morning air and making me flinch before she stops it from impacting, millimeters from my cheek. "There, I hope that woke you up…You came here today to gain a couple levels, not give me attitude!" She turned around and walked away a few steps, flipping the shinai in her hand. "Now, we're gonna go through a few exercises to help bring you up in levels. It's my goal for you to learn your next technique by the end of today's Epic Mentoring session!"

"Mhmm…" I nodded woozily as my eyelids started to get heavy again…I heard a loud snap of the fingers, followed by the biting cold of freezing water slapping me in the face. I screamed out in surprise as it felt like pins and needles were piercing all over my face. "GAH! You're hiding buckets of water in there now?" I wipe at my face with the sleeve of my letterman, shooting Santana a death glare.

"Oh, no, not today, Maricón. That was from my assistant, say 'hi', Brit!" Santana nudged her head towards the bleachers, where Brittany sat, excitedly waving, clutching an obese blue stuffed rabbit for warmth.

"Hi, Davey! Sorry about that!"

"Whuh? How did she…From all the way over there?" I inquired, noting the good 60-70 feet in between us and the bleachers.

"Oh, Brit's been dabbling in the dark arts a bit. So she conjured a splash of water on your face. She'll be helping with the grand majority of your training. Thanks Brit!"

Huh…Brittany's a witch…never would have guessed it…I shook off the rest of the droplets sticking to my hair.

"Okay, shall we get started, then, Packer?"

"*sigh* Like I really have much choice, Munch. I need to get stronger so I can protect Kurt…Say, can Brit conjure me a tall half-skinny half-1 percent extra hot split quad shot-two shots decaf, two shots regular, latte with whip?" Almost on cue with my request, a piping hot cup appeared in front of me in a flash of sparkles. "Wow, thanks, Brit!" I gratefully took the cup and sipped it, savoring the welcome burning of hot caffeine scalding down my throat. *Awareness effect activated—Senses doubled in effectiveness for 1 hour!*

Santana facepalmed, "Ugh…when I didn't think you'd get any gayer…Seriously, that drink just screams rainbow-spitter…"

"Yes, and you like your coffee like your men, excuse me, your women—cold, bitter, and tasteless? Oh wait, that's you." I grin from behind my cup.

Gritting her teeth, Santana stomps up to me and snatches my coffee from my hand.

"Hey! I was drinking that!"

"This," She gestures to the field around us, "is my school today, bitch. And what I say, goes. The only words I wants to hear outta yo' filthy trap are either 'Sir, Bitch, or Naya!" She emphasizes her point by crushing the paper cup in her hand, not even flinching as the steaming java sizzled on her hand. I whimpered my complaint at the loss of my morning caffeine fix.

"Wait, why 'Naya', uh…Sir Bitch?

"It's the name of this one hot girl I've seen, now shut it, muscles. We gots work to do…Hit it, Brit!"

"Wait, which phase are we in again, Tanna?"

"Ugh…" Santana looked completely annoyed but put on a patient face for her girlfriend(?), "Phase 1, Brit! It's the very first one I told you about!" She yelled on back, followed by muttering a slew of grumpy Latina curses. Guess she wasn't such a morning person herself…

"Oh right! I knew that!"

Brittany hopped up excitedly from the bleachers and gently placed her obese stuffed rabbit in front of her. She started glowing and gesturing with her arms, what weirded me out more was that her stuffed animal was mimicking her movements…WTF…Brit closed her eyes and started chanting something, as I leaned my head over to make out what she's casting, several large glowing glyphs appeared on the field around Santana and I…

"Come with us to a place where the least of your worries is a muscle cramp,

David Karofsky, it is time to endure Santana's Epic Boot Camp!

Brittany's spell echoed out into the field as pillars of light shattered through the glyphs on the ground, revealing several towering obstacles, reminiscent of the actual military boot camp obstacle courses…Except these obstacles had rainbow, unicorn, heart, and smiley stickers plastered all over them, and upon closer inspection, they were covered in glitter too…

"Holy shit…" I gazed around in half-wonder and half-disbelief.

"Yes, Brit can pull off things like this." She waved in gratitude towards the elated blonde on the far side of the field, "Now, are you ready, Packer?" Santana walked behind me and swatted my ass with her shinai, ushering me towards the first obstacle in the line of hurdles.

"Whoa! Wait, wait, Edward Scissor-crotch! What am I supposed to do, exactly?" I resisted, pressing my hands against the walls of the first obstacle, surveying how many of these were put in front of me, along with seeing how to overcome each one.

Santana gave me a look that I just knew said 'you dumbass'... "Oh, I don't know, what, pray-tell, do you do on an obstacle course?...Rrgh…Just get to the end, and you'll see what'll happen, Private Tinkerbell!" With a sharp snap of the shinai on my ass, HP: -10 (1048) I yelped out and leapt on to the wall, clutching on the rope as I pulled myself up higher and higher. My muscles started to already feel the burn from the lack of preparation.

"Come on! Climb faster! If God existed, he would have miracled your ass up there by now!" Santana shouted from below me.

"Bitch, yes, Bitch!" I groaned as I heaved myself up higher on the wall. Nervously looking down (which was a fuckin' bad idea on account of my slight fear of extreme heights), I was hit by a slight bout of vertigo. My hands started to sweat and started to slip on the rope, I whimpered in fear.

"Did I say you can stop, Private Tinkerbell? 10 more feet, you slimy scumbag!" Gunnery Sergeant Lopez yelled as she started chucking random shit up at me: travel size bottles of hand sanitizer, cups of Jell-O, rubber-band balls, etc. HP: -1, -1, -2 (1044) I gritted my teeth as I pulled myself up through the insults and the bombardment of office supplies and household amenities.

Growling, I pulled myself up and over the top of the obstacle, landing on a solid platform on the other side. In front of me was a zip-line to the next obstacle in line, I gulped audibly as I gripped the handles.

"Ahem, we ain't got all day, Tinkerbell! Now get to the next one, or I'll gouge out your eyes and skull-fuck you!"

"You ain't got a penis, Lopez!" I flinched as she threw something else up at me, which I caught…and to my disgust, I wish I hadn't. In my hand was a large strap-on dildo, which I instantly threw back down to the ground below, "Fucking gross, woman!" To prevent myself from getting hit by any other disgusting objects, I launched myself from the towering obstacle to the next one, thankfully closer to the ground. This one was an extremely large slope, with no grips and the slope getting much steeper towards the top.

I ran as best as I could up the slope, but the lack of traction quickly sent me sliding back down to the starting platform. I tried again, but concentrating my weight in the balls of my feet; I got a bit further, but as soon as I got to the steepest part, I immediately lost my traction and slipped back down. Getting frustrated, I started 4-legging it up there, attempting to claw my way up the slope. The plan backfired again as I pathetically squeaked back down the slide.

"Oh, that's right, Private Tinkerbell, make no fucking effort to get over my obstacle! I bet if there was some cock up there, you'd make it, wouldn't you?"

"Rrgh…Shut. The. Fuck. UP!" I rammed my fist into the wood, punching a hole through it; I used it as a foothold to propel myself up into the air, "Crimson Sky!" SP: -10 (256) Crashing my heel into the surface, the sheer force sent me sailing barely past the steepest part of the slope, allowing me to grab hold of the platform at the top. I fell to my knees and panted heavily; it's strange, why the hell I'm I getting exhausted so quickly?

"Hey, Munch! What's the deal, I made it past two of these things and already I'm wiped!"

"Look around you!" I did as she said and saw a noticeable warping of the air around each obstacle, like they're encased in a bubble. "Every obstacle has variations of Earth's gravity! With each one you overcome, the gravity increases by 1; the first one was regular Earth gravity, the second was 2 times, the third 3 times, and so on!"

Holy shit…No wonder I'm feeling so weighed down. I peered in front of me and saw that there were 3 more for me to conquer…Suddenly, I heard a rustling of grass; I immediately looked towards it and I could have sworn I saw a tiny glint of blonde hair, but it disappeared immediately in the taller grass outside of the baseball field. "Whoa, Lopez! There's someone—"

"Enough hallucinating, Private Tinkerbell! Hurry it up!" I was pelted with Jolly Ranchers and a Playstation Move Wand. I growled as I shook off the looming feeling of predation and jumped down the wooden platforms leading to the next obstacle. As soon as I stepped into the next bubble, I immediately felt the effects of my weight literally tripling, making me hunch over as if an extra 225 pounds was strapped on to my back. Thankfully, this obstacle wasn't dealing with heights, as it consisted of 10 diagonal platforms over a pool of water. It seems I'm supposed to jump from one platform to the next, alternating left and right. Hey, I think I saw this one on Ninja Warrior…

"Less internal monologue, more jumping! And try not to fall in the water, with the gravity being where it is, you won't be able to get your ass back to the surface!"

I took a shuddering breath and jumped to the first platform, my legs felt like lead weights, as I barely made it to the platform. My foot started sliding from the angled surface towards the water; I gritted my teeth as I wrenched my weighed down leg from the platform and launched myself at the next one and the ones after that, trying to keep up my momentum as each landing gave a booming thud. By the 9th platform, my legs were starting to give out, a searing feeling spreading through them. Sweat accumulated heavily along my hairline, my breathing becoming labored, I managed to launch myself at the 10th platform.

But as I was about to jump to the ending platform, my legs collapsed involuntarily from the sheer amount of gravitational stress. I quickly reached out to the ledge as my feet touched the water; gripping the edge of the platform, I desperately tried to pull myself up, but 675 pounds was a tad difficult to pull up. My fingers started to give way…

"Come on, Private Tinkerbell! PULL! NOW! MOVE IT! Or I will rip your balls off, so you cannot contaminate the rest of the world with your weakness! I will motivate you, if it short-dicks every cannibal in the Congo!"

"God…Fucking…Dammit…Rrgh…I'm…not…WEAK!" I gripped the edge so tightly that the wood splintered. I used my angry motivation to wrench myself up and over the ledge. As I reached safe ground, I flopped on my back, desperately catching my breath and grasping at my legs, which started to get that painful springy feeling.

"Come on, Tinkerbell! Two more! Two more! Get off your fat ass and make that philosophic journey of self-improvement!"

I gritted my teeth at the 'fat' remark, but managed to roll off the platform and onto the grass, out of the gravitational bubble. Taking a few moments to regain my strength in normalized gravity, Drill Instructor Bitch stomped up to me again.

"I said MOVE IT!" The only response she received from me was more heavy panting, "Okay, you asked for it, Epic Nut Shot!" Her foot glowed yellow and rushed towards my junk; being the victim of several Epic Nut Shots in the past, I was able to see it coming from a mile away. I grabbed her foot in time and pushed it back, sending Santana scrambling down to the ground. "Rrgh…watch it, you slimy fucking walrus-looking piece of shit, I own your ass! Now get to it!" My Lesbo-Wan Kenobi spat at me from her humbling position on the grass.

The next hurdle was nothing but a simple set of 30 or so tires to high-knee through, but I can guess that it's gonna be pretty damn difficult with 4 times the Earth's gravity bearing down on me…Shit, this all seems like a bad idea from something like Dragon Ball Z…I stepped into the next bubble, feeling that strong lurching feeling in my internal organs. Not wasting any more time, I high-kneed into the first tire. As soon as my foot hit the grass, it drove itself deep down into the ground.

"F-fuck…" I gritted through my teeth as I tried desperately to yank my leg out of the ground. "Goddamn it! Fuckin' get out of there!"

"What the hell are you doing, Tinkerbell? Why aren't you doing a Stat Boost?" Santana looked down at me in my own humbling position.

"Stat Boost? What the chocobo-fuck are you jabbering about woman?"

"Dios mio…He didn't read the tutorial. He didn't read the fucking tutorial!" She paced back and forth, lightly rapping her shinai on her forehead in frustration. "Whatever. Look, Maricón, sometimes anger doesn't always pull through, sometimes you gotta do a Stat Boost—you donate a certain amount of SP, half of which temporarily increases a stat of your choosing."

"Right…ergh…right, you make it sound like an RPG, Munch."

"Life is an RPG, bitch…"

"Okay…Nngh…Here goes…" I focus my energy to boost the strength in my muscles; a buzzing force leeched out of my head and into the rest of my body. I unclenched my teeth, as it suddenly became extremely easier to resist the force of gravity, but an unbearable wobbly feeling shot through my head… SP: -250 (6) STR: +125 Oops…Used a little too much SP there…

"Get moving, Tinkerbell! You only get to use that increase for length of the amount increased!"

Oh, shit! 125 seconds…gotta move! I easily wrenched my foot out of the ground to high-knee through the next few tires, but things started to slow down again as I kept stomping my foot down harder than I expected, driving my legs deeper and deeper into the grass. "Hehe…fuck, don't my own strength…"

"Stop messing around, you're wasting valuable time!" Santana started physically motivating me by swinging that damn bamboo sword at me, which, thanks to the increased gravity, felt like an iron pipe instead.

"OW! HP: -30 What the OW! HP:-30 Fuck OW! HP: -30 Are you OW! HP: -30 Doing? OW! HP: -30 (894)" I took the flustered, panting, hair-a-total-mess look as a sign to get my ass moving. I pulled my leg out of the ground again but tried to bring it down as lightly as I possibly could; the ground pitted slightly but not enough to trap my foot in it. Using this technique, I managed to high-knee through the rest of the tires, with Drill Sergeant Munch swinging the shinai behind me. I stopped momentarily to finally catch the swinging bamboo sword to pull it out of Santana's dangerous hands and snapped it into splinters in front of her enraged face.

Not stopping to rest, I needed to get through the final obstacle before my enhanced strength fades. I ran into the 5th and final bubble to find a 'hallway' of chicken wire to crawl under. I could feel the next pile of weight slam on my shoulders, but it's gonna be a hell of a lot worse if I don't finish this soon…I quickly dove under the wire and pulled myself forward with my knees and forearms. I got into an awkward position and had to readjust myself; my elbow reached up a little too high and touched the chicken wire, where I got a nice surprise…*BZZT!* HP: -50 (844)

"GAH! What the shit? You electrified the wire?" I screamed out, wincing as I carefully nursed my arm, which started to go numb. Ooh…that smarts, I've only been electrocuted once and that was when I was 10 or something; I was staying at Az's house and we made toast. My bread slices got stuck in there, and he said to stick a fork in there to get them out…You can imagine the rest, and know as to why Az isn't in any AP courses…

"What, you're surprised? Boy, you'd think you'd know already that Santana Anacleta Zamora De Alvaladejo Lopez can do and does do anything!" She sassed with her hands on her hips and her head making that swaggering motion.

I rolled my eyes as I continued to pull myself forward with a numb arm, "Rrgh…crazy…psycho…lesbian…" Just as the exit was in sight, I suddenly felt tremendous pressure slamming down into my back and all throughout my body. "N-n-no! Goddamn it!" My time was up and my strength dropped back down to normal, and I'm sure that the last of my SP won't do jack shit to help. STR: -125 I clawed my hands into the grass and pulled as hard as I could, dirt ramming its way into my fingernails. Despite my efforts, I was only able to budge a couple inches. Shit…I can't keep this up…I'm…exhausted…I lost the strength to hold my own head up and just laid there in the grass, an immobile lump.

"Oh for God's or whosever's sake…Move it, inútil pinche idiota payaso!" When her long stream of Spanish insults failed to move me, she resorted to the big motivator, "Ay, Cabrón…Ugh, think about Kurt! You're doing this for him, aren't you? Imagine he's right there at the exit, waiting for you with open arms! You can't protect him if you can't make it through this, he needs you!" She audibly gags on her inspirational words.

I shakily pick my head up off the ground and gaze in front of me, the bracer Kurt gave me glinting in the faint morning light. "K-k-kurt…" I ground my teeth together and tapped into that indomitable willpower that drives me to protect Kurt, to keep him safe, to hold him close and never let go…I wrenched myself forward with everything that I had, "Son of a bitch...MOVE!" I inched forward even more…Just a couple more feet, it's right there…! Come on, come on! I need to do this, I need to be strong, not just for Kurt, but for myself and those who I care about…I pushed past all the painful signals my muscles and bones are screaming at me. My arm reached the last couple of inches and touched the grass outside of the electric wire. "I'm…here…Kurt…"

Almost instantly, the overbearing weight lifted off of me, I felt like I was floating a couple of inches off the ground. As soon as I regained my bearings, I quickly pulled myself out of the wire tunnel and up off the ground. Right before my eyes, the five obstacles burst in a flash of light, fading away in the rising beams of sunlight. I grinned as a strong, warm, cuddly feeling worked its way into my chest and flashed outward in a cerulean light. Level up time!

David: Level up! (15 – 16)

HP: +57 (1073 – 1130)

SP: +23 (266 – 289)

STR: +8 (108 – 116)

DEF: +7 (80 – 87)

SPD: +9 (83 – 92)

SP ATK: +10 (80 – 90)

SP DEF: +11 (72 – 83)

LUK: +6 (44 – 50)

XP: (275/5750)

Bonus increase to STR: +30 (116 – 146)

Bonus increase to SPD: +20 (92 – 112)

Hell to the fuckin' yeah! I flexed my guns and felt the raw energy coursing through them, hehe…Kurt's gonna love dem arms…

"You done admiring yourself, Sir Pole-smoker? We've got a lot more to do…" Santana impatiently tapped her foot on the grass.

"Can't it wait a bit, Lezzy McGuire? I'm just a tad exhausted here…" My head still a bit woozy from the loss of SP, I got a bit angry at the world for not refilling my Hit and Skill points after a level up.

"Ugh…Chinga a tu madre…I do have to play the babysitter. Here…And don't ever say that I never did anything nice for you!" She pulled out a small purple bottle and tossed it above me, where it exploded into a shower of sparkles, which rushed into me rejuvenating all my lost energy and vigor. HP: Fully Restored! (1130) SP: Fully Restored! (289)

"Okay, so I need to ask—"

"As much as I want in there." She ran her hand through her hair. "Okay, now that you're all healed up, ready for stage 2?"

"I thought you and Brit are doing phases not stages?"

"Whatever! Brit!"

Brittany excitedly got up again and performed her spellcasting routine, even more glyphs surrounding Santana and I, by my count, there must be at least 20...

"An army from the darkest of mires,

Here to snuff out dreams, hopes, and desires.

Upon mine command, shall they attack,

Fight you must, to return them to the deepest of black…Goblin Army!"

Did I just hear her correctly? Goblin…Army? Oh shit…

Shattering through the glyphs was a sizable attack force comprised of little green men, probably no more than 3 feet tall. Pointy ears, glowing red eyes, sharp teeth, decked out in makeshift armor, wielding poorly made clubs and knives. Oh, and did I mention that they smelled bad?

"Alright Goblin Army, here's your target, right here!" I gaped at Santana, who had pointed me out to the approaching legion of monsters. But for some odd reason, they had their sights still on the both of us. "Uh…Brit? There's something wrong here, they're not following orders! Brit!"

"Uh oh…Sorry, Tanna! I…accidentally summoned their boss as well…"

I looked about the encroaching mass of fiends and saw one particular goblin that was significantly taller than the rest, and a hell of a lot more muscular and intimidating.

"Well, what are you waiting for, Maricón? Brit summoned them, now kick their asses!" Santana got behind me and pushed me towards the goblin army.

"Whoa! Hey hey! Don't push, I'll kick their slimy green asses when I'm ready!" I call back to a retreating Santana.

"I'm not slimy…Take him down!" The boss goblin sounded hurt and offended before calling out his order. I was suddenly swarmed by a mass of green…

The first one rushed me but met my foot squarely into his face, sending him barreling back, taking a few of his buddies with him. From the corner of my eye I saw a club swinging at me, which I managed to catch in time. I wrenched the club out of the goblin's hands as I kicked him in the head as well. Brandishing my commandeered weapon, I swung it about, cracking into several goblin skulls and sending them flying, appropriate for the baseball field. However, the little bastards were persistent and kept getting back up after getting knocked around.

Crap…I looked at the club I was holding, it was literally holding together by a couple splinters. Well, no backing down now, time to go all gung ho! I ran towards the group of goblins and snapped the club in two in my hands, thrusting the broken pieces into the heads of two of the little monsters. As the two fell limp, I uppercutted another into the air and grabbed him by the ankles, rapidly spinning us vertically, like an orange buzzsaw. "Vermilion Spiral!" SP: -30 (259) I slammed him down hard on the ground, causing a large explosion of concussive force, sending a large amount of the goblins flying in all directions.

"Come on, who wants a piece of me?" I taunted the recovering army. The minions stopped in their tracks when the boss goblin stepped forward to challenge me. "Alright, big guy, let's see what you've got…"

The larger green guy unsheathed a large hand axe and roared as he charged at me. Feeling brave, I stood my ground to catch his swinging arm, which I brought down hard onto my knee, hearing a sickening snap, breaking his arm in two. The boss goblin howled in agony as he dropped his axe from his floppy hand. I wrenched the axe blade out of the grass, "Aww…I'm sorry, you want this back?" I offered the axe to him, he looks at me apprehensively. "Then take it!" I embed it deep into his shoulder, a spray of purple blood spilling out, luckily not in my direction. "Now, outta my face! Golden Hammer!" SP: -45 (214) I drove my elbow into his chest and focused a shining ball of energy in my opposite palm, which I slammed into my fist. The energy shot through my arm and out the boss goblin's back in a golden beam of light, sending him flying far across the field.

The goblin army scrambled around their boss to try and help him back up. My eye twitched in annoyance when he managed to stagger back up, damn it, nuts to this, time for the easy way out…I ran over to Santana,

"What are you doing, Cabrón? HEY!" I reached into her hair and pulled out what I was looking for.

"Sorry, Munch, need this a lot more than you do at the moment…" I pulled the pin out of the stashed grenade and chucked it into the crowded mob, hitting the boss directly in the head, toppling him over. "Get down!" I pulled Santana down to the grass with me as a deafening explosion rocked the field, multiple goblin parts raining down on us.

"Eww, eww, get offa me, Betty Cocker, I'm fine!" Santana flailed as I pried my arm off of her, brushing off a severed hand or two. We both got up to survey the damage done—a large crater pitting into the center of the outfield, dozens of arms, legs, and heads peppering the entire field, parts of it dyed purple from all the goblin blood.

"*whistles* So much carnage from a little grenade…" I mused, kicking at an arm.

"I was gonna say—How did you know that was in there?"

"Oh, when you made me brush your hair, I saw it in there, right before the mouse trap snapped on my hand…"

"Yeah, yeah…Next time you reach into—" She gestures to her hair, "This, I'm making sure some rusty barbed wire is in there for you…"

"Umm…You're welcome?"

Santana shot me a death glare then called over to Brittany, "Hey Brit, we're gonna need a clean-up here!"

"Hey, Home Depot, no need, look!" I pointed out to the scattered corpses glowing and suddenly flashing out of existence, leaving white experience orbs, all of which shot towards me. I staggered back, ugh…damn, the impact from those things is always almost painful…

Monsters defeated: Finishing blow – Grenade (You cheap-ass)

Goblin: 250 x 25 = 6250 XP

Goblin Boss: 1500 x 1 = 1500 XP

Total: 7750 XP

Sweet! Another level-up!

David: Level up! (16 – 17)

HP: +61 (1130 – 1191)

SP: +17 (289 – 306)

STR: +6 (146 – 152)

DEF: +14 (87 – 101)

SPD: +7 (112 – 119)

SP ATK: +5 (90 – 95)

SP DEF: +9 (83 – 92)

LUK: +2 (50 – 52)

XP: (2275/6300)

Bonus increase to SP ATK: +15 (95 – 110)

Bonus increase to LUK: +30 (52 – 82)

Sheesh, I'm getting some crazy bonuses for working with the psycho lesbian today…I'm not complaining, that mob fight was fuckin' easy! Though I'm still holding out to know what exactly the hell Luck does for me…

"Well, good job, you got a good level up outta that. Feeling stronger now, Maricón?" Santana casually punches me in the chest.

"Totally, these special bonuses are helping too!"

"Yup, that's what you get from Santana's Epic Mentoring!" She nonchalantly flips her hair; I inwardly roll my eyes at the lack of humility.

"Heh, I'm not even gonna ask how you're able to rig the experience system to add in your bonuses, that's how grateful I am." In the distance I see another rustle in the tall grass and another flash of blonde hair, "Lady-dude! Look, over there! Did you see that?" She looks over, disinterested, and looks back over to me, still disinterested. "I think someone's…stalking…me? *sigh* okay, I'm done being paranoid…" I swear, this feels like when Mercedes was stalking me at the mall…

"Good, 'cause it's time for the third exercise…Brit!"

Brittany perked up and jogged over towards us with a stack of papers in her hands…Oh shit…no…not this again…

"Hi, Davey. I made this for you, it's too bad Kurt isn't here, I made him a copy for him too." She handed me a good amount of pages, my hands already trembling at what I'm gonna have to read.

"Brit, how did you work the copier, I wasn't there with you…" Santana took Kurt's copy and flipped through it.

"Coach Sylvester helped me, she said even though I wasn't a Cheerio anymore, she'd let me use the copier. So I made 4 copies."

"Whoa, wait, why 4 copies, Brit?" I asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Well, 2 are for you and Kurt, 1 was a thank you for Coach Sylvester, and the other one is for Lord Tubbington to edit."

"Brittany! You gave one of these to Coach Sylvester?" I was kind of freaking out that smut between Kurt and I would be given to Sue, of all people, to read.

"Yes, David. Coach Sylvester is one of my closest followers; she regularly reviews my stories on Fanfiction…"

My eye twitched as Santana ushered both of us to the bleachers, "Come on, bite the bullet, Packer, it's a free level-up for you if you read through the whole thing…"

"You're evil, you know that, Santana? Why do I have to be subjected to read porn about my own boyfriend and me?"

"Because I like to see people squirm, no matter how much I like or dislike them."

*sigh*…Well, I guess there's no turning back now…I take a deep breath and read over the title of the fic:

---

Melted Karommel

Written by: Brittany S. Pierce

Edited by: Lord Raphael Da Firenze Tubbington

David Karofsky laid in bed, sore from a long day of football practice. He adamantly wished that his boyfriend, Kurt Hummel could be there right now, because as Kurt very well knew, David got extraordinarily aroused after physically strenuous activity. Unfortunately for Dave, Kurt was working late at his father's auto shop and won't be out for at least another hour. Since Kurt's dad and step-mother were on their late honeymoon, Kurt had to take his dad's place at the shop, which meant less time spent with his boyfriend.

The straining bulge in David's jeans started to get unbearable; he did masturbate frequently before he met Kurt, but ever since they started dating, they had sex at least 3 times a day, thanks to Kurt's also-insatiable appetite. So far, their record is 10 times in a 24 hour period, and to both Kurt and David, an orgasm through sex is far more enjoyable than simple masturbation. David didn't want to jerk it away, he wanted sex with his boyfriend, and he wanted it now. He scooped his keys off his nightstand and snuck out of his room and down the stairs, silently unlatching the deadbolt and opening the front door. He started up his truck and took off out of the cul-de-sac, heading towards Kurt's neighborhood. As he drove up to the Hummel-Hudson household, he parked on the other side of the street; he planned on surprising Kurt with a little surprise 'buttsecks'.

David took out his cell phone and looked at the clock on the display; Kurt should be back any minute now. As if on cue, Kurt's Lincoln Navigator pulled into the driveway, a gorgeous specimen of a boy gracefully stepping out of the behemoth SUV, clad in a baggy pair of coveralls. Saliva started to pool in David's mouth, Kurt can make a paper bag look sexy, those coveralls just downright made him unbearably tempting…

David immediately got out of his truck and quickly followed after his boyfriend, stopping as Kurt reached the porch. Just as Kurt opened the front door, David cleared his throat,

"Ahem!"

Startled, Kurt screamed out and turned around. His fears of a burglar or a rapist were put to rest when he saw his impossibly handsome and hunky man standing in front of the porch.

"Hey there, Fancy."

"Hey, yourself, babe. What are you doing here?" Kurt walked up to David with one hand on his hip, Dave inwardly groaned as when ever Kurt shifts his weight that way, he puts his beautiful ass on display. And was it ever a beautiful ass, even after ramming into it relentlessly multiple times, it stayed unbelievably tight and perfect.

"I-uh…Have a…problem…that needs fixing…" Dave blushed intensely.

"Ugh, can it wait til tomorrow, David? I just got back from the shop, and I'm sorry, but I'm kinda done with seeing cars for the day."

"Um…no, it doesn't have to do with my truck, my problem is…um…well…" David sheepishly looked down at his crotch, thankfully Kurt followed Dave's line of sight, landing on a very prominent and impressive erection, noticeably being able to bulge through the tight denim jeans.

"Oh my…well, that does need to be fixed. Come on in, I'll get 'im all lubed up for you…" Kurt teased with a wink and pulled David into the house with him. Fortunately, Finn was not home, he frequented Rachel's or Quinn's house until at least past 11pm.

"So, did your dad purposefully put you in charge of the shop just so we'd have less time together?" David asked as Kurt carefully pulled him downstairs with him.

"Heh, I believe that was the plan." As they got to the foot of the stairs in Kurt's basement bedroom, David firmly wrapped his arms around the smaller boy and grinded his denim-clad erection against the backside of Kurt's coveralls. "Oh, goodness, hun, when's the last time we took care of that?"

David nuzzled his face into Kurt's hairline and breathed in his scent, "Mm…must have been about 6 hours ago in my truck before football practice and before you had to leave to man the shop."

Kurt moaned lightly as the feeling of his boyfriend's swollen hard-on pushing past the barriers between them and grinding against his backside. "Oh my…That's far too long, babe, you must have been hurting…"

"You're damn right I am…Fuck, you look so sexy in these coveralls…" David grinded himself even harder against Kurt's ass and moved his hand slowly down the front side of the baggy piece of clothing. To no surprise, David gripped his boyfriend's already throbbing erection through the material, Kurt adding in a shuddering moan before swiftly turning around.

"How the hell do you keep doing this to me, Hamhock?" Kurt's eyes were filled with a dark lust as he wrapped his arms around Dave's neck and pulled himself up to meet his lips in a passionate embrace. David squeezing his arms tighter around the little mechanic, Kurt opened his mouth to let out a moan, an opportunity which the bigger boy seized by letting his tongue invade the sweet and hot space. The two boys pulled each other in ever so tightly, their clothed erections sliding against each other, making both of them pull their heads back in a pleasured hiss. Kurt and David gazed into each other's eyes, a complete understanding of raw lust and unadulterated love shared between the two.

The fashionista-turned-mechanic grabbed the jock's large hands (which, by the way, are very indicative of the massive member he kept in his jeans. Kurt always drooled at the thought of his boyfriend's 8-inch long, 6-inch round rod impaling his tight hole.) and led him to the en suite bathroom. "Come on, I'm not gonna be rammed into orgasmic bliss smelling like a carburetor…"

Kurt turned on the hot water and adjusted it to the desired temperature. As steam stared to fill the bathroom, the hunky football player pressed himself up against Kurt's backside against and ran his hands across the smaller boy's firm chest, finding the coverall's zipper and slowly pulling it down, unsheathing Kurt's sexy frame from the baggy piece. Stepping out of his socks, boots and coveralls, Kurt was left clad only in his undershirt and tight navy boxer briefs. He turned around to face the still-fully-clothed David,

"Clothes off now, caveman…" Kurt pulled at the gaudy red letterman and tossed on the floor. He ran his hands across Dave's wide chest, lightly growling with carnal desire. "Is this shirt expensive?" Kurt asked rhetorically, knowing that the grand majority of shirts David owned were composed of cheap cotton. After Dave shook his head, Kurt grinned darkly and dug his fingernails into the material and pulled, ripping the entire thing outward from the chest.

David always found it extremely arousing when Kurt got this aggressive; it lets him know that Kurt desperately wants Dave's thick cock buried deep in his greedy ass. With his chest exposed, David gasped out when Kurt latched his mouth and tongue on one of his nipples, hungrily sucking like a newborn for milk. The smaller boy popped off the jock's chest and started kissing down lower on his body, coming to a stop at the straining mound in front of him. Now on his knees, Kurt eagerly unbuttoned the tight jeans, hooking his thumbs under the waistband of Dave's underwear and pulling down both articles, his fully-bared cock made a reverberating slap against his stomach.

The hungry power bottom wasted no time in diving straight into his boyfriend's groin, greedily swallowing the entirety of the massive piece of man-meat, thanks to having no gag reflex. David pounded his fist on the bathroom wall, nearly toppling over,

"F-fuck! Goddamn Fancy, you want it bad, don't you?" Kurt moaned his affirmative, making a vibration that shot through Dave's throbbing member, causing the football player to throw his head back with a loud moan. "Yesss…Take it all…" David grasped Kurt's head and thrust himself further into the feverish recesses of Kurt's throat. Finally pulling off before his boyfriend could climax, Kurt got up and pulled David into the shower with him, letting the hot water cascade around their bodies. The jock gripped his arms tightly around the smaller boy and hungrily mashed their lips together, their tongues madly wrestling, saliva messily dribbling out from the corners of their mouths.

Kurt pulled off and turned around, grabbing his loofah and shower gel. The sweet scent of strawberries wafted through the entire shower as Kurt generously lathered himself head to toe, David leaned back against the shower wall, enjoying the show as he slowly stroked himself. As Kurt bent over, his ass cheeks parted to expose his tight, puckered hole. The engaging sight snapped the last straw holding David back from sexually assaulting his vulnerable boyfriend. He closed the space in between them,

"I'm sorry Kurt…I really can't wait, I need to be inside you right now…" He picked up the bottle of lube they kept in the shower (they have a bottle of lube stashed in every room in both their houses, as they've practically done it in every room) and slathered a generous amount on his fingers, which quickly found their target in Kurt's quivering hole. The young fashionista gasped sharply and hunched forward, using the shower wall to support himself.

David's thick fingers deftly slid in and out of his boyfriend's tight ass, "Goddamn it, Kurt…Why are you so fucking tight?" Kurt could only moan wildly in response until he growled angrily,

"Damn it, Karofsky, put your fucking cock in me right now!"

That was all David needed to hear before he quickly pulled his fingers out and lubed up his copiously leaking erection. In one swift plunge, Dave buried himself to the hilt in Kurt's greedy asshole, causing Kurt to scream out in a dangerous mix of raw pleasure and agony. The jock offered his hand to Kurt's mouth, making him bite down on the webbing between his thumb and index finger, the other arm wrapped tightly around Kurt's chest, bringing him in closer as David sought to embed himself deeper inside than ever before.

Having enough time to readjust to the throbbing monster in his ass, Kurt reached back and firmly grasped his boyfriend's hips to tell him to start moving. The hot water made the sensations nigh-unbearable, as their slick bodies slid together, as one cohesive mass of unbound pleasure and carnal joy. David forcefully wrapped both arms around Kurt and started ramming himself roughly in and out of the impossibly tight ass, the friction already bringing him near the edge. During his violent thrusting, Dave's thick cock rammed hard against the sensitive bundle of nerves protruding from the wall inside Kurt's ass.

"AHH! Yes, David! Right there! Oh god, please…Fuck me harder! Fuck me harder!"

To hear Kurt beg was like turning David's aggression dial past 100%. He immediately pulled out of Kurt and turned him around to pick him up off the ground as if he were nothing. While holding him up, Dave positioned his cock, standing at full attention, under Kurt's ass and immediately thrust himself inside relentlessly. Kurt screamed out again and wrapped his legs tightly around his hunky boyfriend's waist. As he thrust himself upward, David pulled down on Kurt's body, increasing the force of himself slamming against Kurt's hips. As if that weren't enough, Dave walked them back towards the shower wall and slammed Kurt's small frame hard against it, mashing his body against an unstoppable force and an immovable object. Normally, Kurt would balk from the thought of bruises covering his svelte physique, but when they were from David Karofsky, he gladly welcomed them, letting him know that he belongs to him.

Kurt felt no pain, just unbridled pleasure from the feeling of being violently dominated by his aggressive jock of a boyfriend, feeling his thick cock slide effortlessly in and out of his hole, constantly brushing against his prostate. Steam billowed all around them, profanities rang through the entire bathroom, loud moans permeated above the sound of running water. As their wet bodies slapped together, their mouths were locked in a primeval battle of tongues, teeth and spit.

David pulled his mouth off of Kurt's and leaned his forehead against his, savagely growling as he continued his onslaught of ramming his about-to-burst dick in and out of the smaller boy's eager and hungry hole. "Rrgh…Kurt…I'm gonna fuckin' cum…I'm gonna fuckin' cum in your ass!"

"Oh god! David! I'm gonna cum too!" Kurt's hand was vigorously jerking at his own dick. "F-f-fuck! David! Oh god, I love you!" Kurt's pupils dilated noticeably as his face showed the impending arrival of his climax.

"AHH! I fuckin' love you, Kurt! Oh fuck, here it comes!" David thrust himself in as hard as he possibly could, feeling his cock empty itself in countless streams of semen shooting deep in Kurt's ass. At the same time, Kurt's eyes rolled back in his head as he screamed out once more, letting loose his own powerful jets of cum which completely shot past his face and hit the wall above and behind him. As both boys' bodies twitched violently in their orgasms, consciousness started to fade; David's knees started to buckle as he slid his own body with Kurt's down the shower wall and on to the floor.

Managing to pull out before he lost total consciousness, David exhaustedly laid on top of Kurt, unable to move. Both boys melted together, letting the now-lukewarm water cascade over them, their minds drifting away in unconscious bliss…

---

Nose is bleeding! HP: -5 (1186)

You are as hard as a rock! Mood: Aroused and Embarrassed

I put down the manuscript in my lap as calmly as I could, covering up the lump showing itself through my jeans. Brittany gave me an eager and expectant smile, "Brit…that was…" I gulped through the words.

"Hot, wasn't it? I can't take all the credit, of course. Lord Tubbington wrote most of the sexy scenes…I think we've outdone ourselves with this one, it's still a rough draft, but we're already drawing up plans for a graphic novel and an animated series."

"And it will sell. Right, Brit?" Santana said, Brittany returned with an eager nod.

"Umm…excuse me, ladies…Can you two give me a moment? I need to concentrate to umm…will things down…" I blushed as I subtly tried to press my junk down under the paper in my lap.

"I have a better idea…" Santana stood up in front of me and quickly unbuttoned her shirt, exposing her breasts to me. Needless to say, my cock quickly deflated, but I was left emotionally scarred and traumatized. I squeezed my eyes shut and shook my head,

"Gah! What the fuck, Lopez? Of course you're not wearing a bra!" I carefully peel my eyes open to thankfully see Santana buttoning her shirt back up…with Brittany gently cupping one of the covered breasts,

"She does have nice boobs…bigger than Finn's too…" Oh come on, leave the poor guy alone. It's bad enough that he has a premature ejaculation problem and gets made fun of for that as well.

"Oh, right, one more thing, Cockarofsky…" Santana snaps her fingers, signaling the surging feeling of a level-up flash to appear outward from my chest.

David: Level up! (17 – 18)

HP: +67 (1191 – 1258)

SP: +19 (306 – 325)

STR: +10 (152 – 162)

DEF: +9 (101 – 110)

SPD: +4 (119 – 125)

SP ATK: +10 (110 – 120)

SP DEF: +7 (92 – 99)

LUK: +5 (82 – 87)

XP: (2275/7000)

Bonus increase to HP: +250 (1258 – 1508)

Bonus increase to DEF: +20 (110 – 130)

Brittany beams and applauds excitedly, Santana gives me the 'good' nod.

"Hoo…*pant* Santana…can we take a little break? All this leveling up his making me hungry and overwhelmed with the amount of power I'm getting…"

"Sorry, Maricón, no rest for the wicked, namely, myself. Besides we still have much more to do…" Santana pulled me up off the bleachers and walked me to the pitcher's mound in the center of the field. "Come on Brittany, it's time…" Brittany hops up and brings along her fat blue rabbit, skipping down to the field along with us.

"What do you mean 'it's time', Munch? What are we doing?" I looked confusedly at both girls who stood in front of me with a slightly morose look on their faces.

"I'm gonna apologize in advance, Packer. Even though I treat you like a stupid boy, you're still my…friend. And friends should never have to go through this, but after witnessing some of your fights, a certain part of you has resurfaced and made himself known to me."

My eyes widened as I immediately knew that she was talking about Karofsky trying to break free in my fights. I took a step back and shook my head fearfully at Santana. "No…please, don't do this, Santana…"

She slowly walked up to me with a remorseful look, "I'm sorry, Dave. We're gonna have to call out Karofsky…"

"No! I'm not gonna stand here and let—"

"Brit!" Santana nodded to the blonde.

"Sorry Dave…

Limbs freeze and lock,

Numbing binds put the body into shock…Paralyze!"

At those words, my entire body stiffened, my arms and legs unable to budge. Gritting my teeth, tears starting to prick at my eyes, I begged to Brittany, "Please, Brit, stop this! You two don't know what you're dealing with!"

Santana closed her eyes and nodded minutely to Brittany.

"Silence surrounds the words you speak,

Your voice, nothing but an infinitesimal squeak…Mute!"

Suddenly, the words I was trying to scream out became trapped in my throat. As much as I tried to will my voice to be heard, nothing came out of my mouth.

"More, Brittany, we need to have him hopeless…"

"From the darkness, the snake's venomous bite,

Let your body succumb to its terrible blight…Poison!

My eyes widened in fear as a slimy purple blob apparated from the stuffed animal and shot into my chest. A throbbing, tearing feeling started to rip through my veins, the poison destroying me from the inside out. I tried to scream in pain, but nothing would escape… HP: -100 (1408)

More tears flooded out of my eyes, I can't believe these two would be betraying me like this…

"Another, Brit…"

"As darkness surrounds, be enveloped in a blanket of night,

The shadows shall imprison all traces of light…Blind!

An inky black blob shot forth from the rabbit this time, closing in directly on my eyes. As it impacted, an opaque sheet of black covered my eyes…I saw nothing but darkness, not a glimmer of light from the rising sun. So now I stand mute, poisoned, blind, and unable to move, I started to hyperventilate, lost in an empty void. The poison attacked my insides again, a searing pain surging through every inch of my skin. HP: -100 (1308)

Well well well…look what we have here. It looks like baby David is in a hopeless situation, do you need me to step in for you?

Shut the fuck up, Karofsky…Please, don't do anything…Santana is just trying to draw you out!

"David, you're all alone, there's no one here to help you…" Santana's voice rang clear in my ears.

Oh, I'm well aware of that, homo. I just might make a guest appearance and rip these two ladies in half. And then, I'm gonna put our life back on track before you decided to come twirling like a fairy out of your closet.

No! I won't go back to being that bully, I've worked too damn hard fighting you back to reclaim my sanity!

"Tanna, he's coming! The dark aura is starting to appear around him!"

"Okay, we just need to push David a little bit more!"

Well, too fucking bad, you're nothing but a worthless piece of shit who can't defend anything, including himself.

"You're gonna fail in achieving your goal, David. There's simply no way around it; you and Kurt will never be together…" HP: -100 (1208)

There, you see, fairy? Hummel will be much better off in my hands, especially once I reintroduce him to the lockers. Face it, scared little Davey, you've lost.

No! Stop it, I've heard enough! Santana, please, let me out of here! Please, Karofsky can't get out, he'll destroy everything I've fought so hard for!

"You've fought all for nothing, David. Just give up, go back to being Karofsky, you were better off that way."

F-f-fuck! I…can't hold him back…Please…No…I-I-I don't wanna be trapped in here again…

Don't worry, fag, I'll take over from here on out. Go back in the closet and cower there for the rest of your life. Bland was right, you will never truly have Hummel.

No! Karofsky, don't! Please, someone…anyone…help…Kurt…I'm sorry…I lo—

"Tanna, he's breaking free of the effects!"

"Just a little bit more…Now, Brit! Contain him, trap him deep in David's mind!"

"Dark forces, I bind thee from causing hurt, harm, and shame,

Your malevolent influence shall go back to the shadows from whence you came…Banish!"

"Come on you bastard…Hurry up and disappear! I'm not gonna let you keep popping up and ruining everything David is fighting for! Brit, what's wrong? Why isn't he vanishing?" HP: -100 (1108)

"Ugh…I…can't hold him…! He's too strong!"

"What! No!"

"Engh…You…have to run, Tanna!"

"No! I won't leave you here with him, Brit!...I'm sorry, Dave…I wanted to help you, really, I did…Guess I fucked it up, eh?

The darkness around me is so cold…I'm falling deeper and deeper…I've lost my light…Guess this is goodbye…Kurt, we've only spent a few days as boyfriends, but I will treasure each day we've spent together as a lifetime…Anyway, I love you.

"….av.d…dav.d…david…david…David…DAVID!"

…What is that?...A voice?...It's beautiful…It's calling me…A sparkle of light, deep in the darkness…It's warm…Loving…so…familiar…A red string?...It's pulling me...K-k-kurt?...Is that you? Kurt? Where are you? I have to see you! I need to see you! I gotta break free! KAROFSKY! Get the fuck back in here where you belong!

The sparkle of light got bigger and bigger, opening my eyes back up to the world. He was here! The perfect boy whom I idolize and love in every way possible…And he's shaking me…

"DAVID! DAVID!"

"Hey hey hey! Enough with the shaking there, Fancy…I'm…fine." I nearly toppled over, I feel like I've been sublimated, condensed, and solidified one after the other…Kurt grabbed hold of me and pulled me into him, clutching me as tightly as he could. "What…the fuck happened?"

Kurt snapped his head back at Santana and shot her a death glare, "She, had the big idea of torturing you as a way to train you. Who does that?" Did Kurt really not know that I had Karofsky hidden deep in the back of my mind? I gently pulled Kurt off of me and pressed a kiss to his forehead,

"Give me a second, Kurt, I need to talk with Lopez here…" I walked up to Santana and harshly grabbed her arm, tugging her away from the pitcher's mound. As soon as Kurt was out of earshot, "What the fuck were you thinking, you fucking idiot? Why were you trying to bring Karofsky back when I worked so hard to lock him away?" I gripped her shoulders tightly, causing here to wince.

"Look, Packer…I'm sorry that I did things the way I did. I wanted to help you contain that thing, since you weren't exactly doing an A plus job keeping him in check."

I gritted my teeth in anger, "The next time you feel like fucking with my head, don't. Karofsky is my demon to deal with…*sigh*…and mine to deal alone…Ugh…" I hunched over in pain. HP: -100 (1008)

"Oop, sorry about that. Here, lemme take care of that for you." She pulled out another purple bottle and tossed it above me, bursting in a shower of sparkles. I instantly felt good as new once again. HP: Fully restored! (1508) Status effects removed!

"Oh, and another thing…" With a snap up her fingers, I felt another level-up coursing through my system.

David: Level up! (18 – 19)

HP: +47 (1508 – 1555)

SP: +29 (325 – 354)

STR: +6 (162 – 168)

DEF: +9 (130 – 139)

SPD: +6 (125 – 131)

SP ATK: +11 (120 – 131)

SP DEF: +7 (99 – 106)

LUK: +5 (87 – 92)

XP: (2275/7950)

Bonus increase to SP: +75 (354 – 429)

Bonus to increase SP DEF: +20 (106 – 126)

"Hmph, thanks. But don't think that this makes everything okay, because it's not." I stomped away from her and back to Kurt, whose face brightened as I came into view.

"Mm…someone looks stronger and sexy…" I blushed at his statement and nervously scratched at the back of my head.

"Hehe, thanks Fancy, I'm feeling a bit more battle-ready now." I pulled Kurt into me, sorely missing his warmth and his intoxicating scent.

"So, do you have more training to do?" Kurt looked up at me with his shining glasz eyes.

"Yeah…just a couple more, I think."

"Hey Cabrón! Take a break, I'm tired of training your pathetic ass! Here!" Santana tossed me 3 pieces of candy, one of which I offered to Kurt.

"No no, I think I said a while back that Japanese candy makes me hallucinate." He declined tartly.

"Wha? How do you know these are Japanese?" I popped all three into my mouth and crunched down on the tiny rock candies. All of a sudden, 3 strong bursts of energy radiated outward from my chest.

David: Level up! (19 – 22)

HP: +139 (1555 – 1694)

SP: +67 (429 – 496)

STR: +22 (168 – 190)

DEF: +19 (139 – 158)

SPD: +16 (131 – 147)

SP ATK: +26 (131 – 157)

SP DEF: +17 (126 – 143)

LUK: +11 (92 – 103)

XP: (2275/10000)

New technique learned: Viridian Riposte

Next technique learned at level 29

"That's how I know." Kurt smirked teasingly at me.

"What the hell? Hey, Munch, what did you just give me?"

"Rare Candy. I told you, I'm tired of training you."

"Jeez, thanks for all the hard effort…"

"Is that ungratefulness I'm detecting? How does another Epic Nut Shot sound?" Both Santana and I got up in each other's faces, irritation seething through our expressions. Before an accidental epic battle can happen, Kurt quickly jumped in between us,

"Now now, you two…David, you're happy that you're nicely leveled now, right?" I nodded begrudgingly, "Satan, you're happy…? If you're capable of feeling that emotion…That you got to put your 'Epic Mentoring' to the test, right?" Santana nodded begrudgingly as well. "Then, let's forget about all negativity, it'll give you both wrinkles…"

Santana gasped and immediately turned tail, walking back to Brittany who seemed to be reassuring her that she didn't have wrinkles. Suddenly, I saw another rustling in the grass, my stalker is back…I walked back into the field, leaving Kurt back on the pitcher's mound.

"David, what's wrong?" Kurt concernedly inquired.

"Someone's been watching me this whole morning…" Another rustle, a flash of blonde hair. "Dude…" Yet another rustle amongst the taller grass, this was really getting on my nerves, my morning grumpiness catching up to me. "Come on…I'm not in the mood for this…" The rustling got closer as I found myself close to the end of the field where the mowers got lazy and let the grass grow out in an almost crescent shape.

Behind, in front, to the left, to the right; I kept repositioning my body to face in the direction of the predatory noise. Finally, an even louder rustling came from behind me, followed by a gibberish battle cry. I whirled around to see my predator leaping at me, "Goddamn it, I said…" I blocked the assassin's diving punch, "That's ENOUGH!" I delivered a hard right to his face, sending him flying across the field. The predator staggered back up, his hood falling back off his head, revealing shaggy blonde hair.

"Evans…why am I not surprised?" I clenched my fists in irritation; Kurt, Santana, and Brittany ran over to us to check out the commotion.

"Been checking out your little training routine. Gotta say, not too impressed, dude. I've had better grinding sessions fighting Blue Slimes…" Sam ran his hand through his hair.

"Sam! What are you doing here?" Kurt called over at the geeky blonde.

"It's Epic Battle time, I'm afraid, Kurt. I'm sorry, but I'm taking your boyfriend down faster than Sephiroth did Aerith."

"Whoa! Spoiler alert, dude! Some people haven't played that far yet." I warned Sam.

"I keep getting stuck on the big metal scorpion…" Brittany piped up.

"Whatever, like I said, you're going down!" Sam rushed at me with a dashing elbow; by now, I was completely fed up with today's events, I was so not in the mood for an epic battle…Before his elbow could impact, I grabbed his head and stopped him in his tracks, followed by a hard headbutt, making him crumple down to the ground. As he staggered back up, I grabbed his head again and bashed my knee against his forehead, sending him sailing back a couple feet. Sam quickly did a kip-up and shook off the hits. Just as he opened his eyes, I was back on him again, overwhelming him with multiple punches to his face and torso, finishing up with a roundhouse kick to his forehead.

Sam skidded on the ground before coming to a stop; he wobbled back up and grinned darkly at me. "I see that I'm not gonna win this hand-to-hand…Time to go all Na'vi warrior on your ass!" He flicked out his hand, summoning a long beam of light which he grasped. The light quickly flashed out, revealing an arrowhead-tipped spear with a long red ribbon tied to the shaft.

"Dude…is that really a Na'vi warrior spear?"

"Heh, yeah, impressive, eh?" Sam smugly beamed, swinging his spear around.

"Fuckin' dork…" I muttered under my breath.

Suddenly, Sam lunged forward, thrusting the spear forward, I managed to dodge just in time before it could even graze me. He then brought it around to slash at me with the bladed edge, I retreated with a quick back-dash. Shit…I can't get near him without something to protect myself with…

"What the hell are you doing, Packer? Summon your weapon already!" Santana yelled at me.

"What weapon?" I called back to Lopez, both she and Kurt facepalmed and Brittany cocked her head confusedly.

"Dude…you seriously don't know how to summon your weapon?" Sam cocked an eyebrow, shouldering his spear.

"I…kinda…skipped the tutorial…" I sheepishly reply.

"READ THE FUCKING MANUAL, MEATHEAD!" Santana screamed in irritation.

"Wow, that really helps, Master Bitch!" I yelled back sarcastically.

Kurt calmly walked up to us, "Time out, Sam…" Sam put his hands up and walked back a couple steps. "Okay, David, close your eyes." I do as he says. "Now, look deep in your heart, find that weapon that represents who you are. This is your signature weapon, give it shape, give it form. Now, hold out your hand and focus, bring this weapon into reality." I held out my hand and focused intensely, an orb of light appearing in my palm. I opened my eyes, lightly squeezing the orb, making it burst open, revealing my signature weapon: It was a modified hockey stick halberd, a spear-like protrusion sticking out of the sharp curved blade. I held it gingerly in my hands; it fit perfectly in my palms. I looked up from it with a large grin,

"Hell yeah!" I turned to Kurt, beaming.

"Wow, nice one, David! It suits you, definitely." Kurt happily nodded.

"Okay okay, he got his weapon out, now let's do this!" Sam impatiently swung his spear off his shoulder and pointed it at me.

I grabbed Kurt's shoulder and pulled him in to press a kiss to his forehead, "Thank you, Kurt. Now, let me handle this, go back to Munch and Brit." He nodded firmly as retreated back to a safe distance. I turned back to the Na'vi wannabe, "I'm warning you, Sam, I'm really in a bad mood this morning, so forgive me when I end this battle quickly."

"The one ending this battle quickly is gonna be me! Time to kick some ass!"

I spun my hockey stick in my hands and readied it, "Bring it on, Avatar fetishist!"

David Karofsky vs. Sam Evans

BGM: Super Smash Bros. Brawl OST: Stickerbrush Symphony

http:(Slash)(Slash)www(dot)youtube(dot)com(Slash)watch?v=B2D8OpcEey4

FIGHT!

I charged forward, swinging my hockey stick down from above, which Sam blocked by holding his spear above his head. He pushed my weapon off, causing me to stagger back; Sam followed up with a golf swing. I brought down my halberd in time to stop the spear from impacting, but the momentum at which he struck brought me off balance even more, making me stumble back again. He lunged forward with a spear thrust, taking advantage of my vulnerability. Fortunately, I stumbled back so much that I fell completely down to the ground, the spear barely passing above me.

I took the opportunity to grab the spear shaft and pulled it hard, embedding the sharp head in the ground. As Sam struggled to pull his weapon out of the ground, I rolled back, putting some distance between us. When I started to get back up, Sam smirked and let go of the shaft, the flexible wood snapping forward and clocking me in the head. HP: -15 (1679)

I stumbled back onto the ground, rubbing at the top of my head where the spear shaft impacted. Sam firmly gripped his spear and suspended himself upside down, kicking strongly upward, he launched himself into the air, yanking the spearhead out as well. He flipped in the air and came hurtling down, powerfully swinging the spear overhead. I quickly hopped back up and dived away, watching the forceful impact of the swing make a long dent in the field, grass flying up in a green whirlwind. Seizing the opportunity of his vulnerability, I dashed forward and slashed, cutting diagonally into Sam's side.

He grunted and hunched over in pain, clutching the fresh gash. "Heh, not bad, sxwang…But sloppy!" He shot back up and quickly came at me with a diving thrust; I didn't move fast enough to prevent the spearhead from piercing into my shoulder. HP: -80 (1599) I let out a yell as sharp pain rippled from my shoulder throughout the rest of my body. Still keeping the spear embedding in me, Sam vaulted over my head and used the momentum to bring me up and fling me high and across the field; I crashed on the grass hard, skidding a few times to a halt. HP: -50 (1549)

I shook off the pain and got back up, using my hockey stick for support. Inspecting the wound on my shoulder, it didn't hit anything important, but it still hurt like a bitch. In my hesitation, Sam went back on the offensive again, thrusting rapidly; the spear was difficult to track because of that damn red ribbon tied to it…After dodging enough of the thrusts, I managed to catch Sam's weapon in between the curved blade and the straight blade of the halberd. With a twist of the wrist, the spear was trapped, giving me the opportunity to pull back hard, making sure to dodge around the incoming spear and giving Sam a hard elbow in the sternum. Still with my elbow planted in his chest, I stuck my weapon in the grass and brought back my hand, focusing a golden orb of energy in it, slamming down on my opposite fist. "Golden Hammer!" SP: -45 (451)

The immense force shot through my arm and out Sam's back like a bullet, sending him flying backwards, dropping his spear in front of me. He rolled on the ground, clutching his chest in pain; after a moment, he staggered back up, wiping at a bit of coughed up blood from the corner of his puffy lips. I picked up Sam's spear and waved it in the air tauntingly, "Ain't so badass Na'vi warrior without this, are you?"

"Heh, I think I'll take that back now…" Sam held his hand out, and in an instant, the spear vanished in a flash of light and reappeared in his hand across the field. He used the spear as a crutch to help him back up, still clutching his chest in pain.

"Sam! Are you okay?" Our attention turned to the diva standing next to Kurt and the others, who just caught sight of the action.

"Mercedes, stay back, I'm…ergh…fine…Hehe, gonna take a hell of a lot more to bring down. Hear that, dude? I've got a fever and the only cure is a dead Karofsky!"

Nearly all of us facepalmed, with the exception of Brittany, "No one told me that David can cure colds…"

"You know what Evans? Losers always whine about their best, and winners go home and fuck the prom queen! See I can do it too!" From the corner of my eye, I see the girls turn their heads towards a brightly blushing Kurt.

"Well, here's to your life, both seconds of it." Sam held his spear up, pointing it directly at me.

"Are you gonna do something, or just stand there and bleed?" I return with a smirk, pointing my hockey stick at him.

"Ay, chinga a tu madre…Just fight already!" Santana started chucking random shit at us, mostly pencil erasers and stale popcorn.

We dashed forward at each other, our weapons clashing, sparks flew from the metal-on-metal impacts, like fireflies dancing around us and quickly fizzling out. Sam swung his spear hard enough to send a hard vibration buzzing through the titanium shaft of my weapon, causing me to lose my focus momentarily. He took this opportunity to rush forward and headbutted me hard, the thicker part of his skull impacting the ridge of my eye socket. HP: -30 (1515)

As I saw stars, I felt Sam's foot on my bended knee, giving himself a boost to crash his opposite knee into my jaw. HP: -55 (1460) I flew back and landed back down on the grass. Shaking off the stars, I did a kip-up, only to find Sam crouching down close to the ground with his spear, grinning as teal aura surrounded him, "Tell me, you ever danced with the devil in the pale moonlight?"

I looked around confusedly… "…uh…It's daytime, dude…"

"Rrgh…Whatever! Wavedash!" Sam pushed off the ground with blinding speed; I readied my weapon in defense, but lost sight of the target when he completely disappeared in front of me. I looked around frantically for the geeky hunter, finding nothing until I felt a sharp pain nicking my side, followed by a speeding blur passing by me. HP: -50 (1410)

I couldn't keep up with his movements; Sam managed zip past me several times, faster than what can be humanly seen, cutting me up in the process…1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9 more times… HP: -50x9 (960)

I collapsed to the ground, dizzy from the drop in blood pressure, numerous bloody slashes showing on my arms, legs, and sides. Suddenly, the grass flew up in my face, Sam skidding to a stop in front of me. He crouched over and sneered mockingly, "Aww…Did that hurt? I promise you, the next one isn't gonna hurt as much…" He raised his spear, held underhand, aimed directly at my head.

I looked up at him and grinned darkly, "Hehe…ever notice how you come across somebody once in a while you shouldn't have fucked with? That's me!" I quickly rammed the end of the curved blade of my hockey stick into Evan's foot, making him yell out in agony. Wasting no time, I pulled out the blade and thrust the spear end into his thigh, screams of bloody murder escaping his throat. Pulling a page out of Sam's book, I heaved myself into the air, using my weapon as leverage, pulling out of his leg with a nauseating *SHLICK!*.

Time to end this battle and get on with my day… I spun myself forward, acting like a buzzsaw with my halberd out, "Time to end this! Vermilion Spiral!" SP: -30 (421) Sam desperately held up his spear to defend; it took quite a few hits before it completely snapped in two. As soon as I saw that I cleaved his final defense in twain, I came back around for one more diving slash, a red aura trailing behind my weapon, "Coup de grace—Crimson Sky!" SP: -10 (411).

The curved end of my hockey stick embedded itself deep in Sam's shoulder, no doubt severing his aorta. I closed my eyes and turned my head from the sight of the life leaving his eyes, as the notion of killing is still pretty hard on me. I wrenched my weapon out of his body, which immediately fell limp and collapsed to the ground below.

K.O.!

"Sam, no!" Mercedes ran over and kneeled down beside the motionless blonde, shaking him frantically to get some sign of life out of him. Wait…are they dating, is he the man she was teasing Kurt about earlier? "C'mon, White Boy, don't do this to me…"

Santana stalked on over and nudged her shoe at the hysterical diva, "Ay, chica estupida! There's no point in crying, you know full well that he's coming back in a couple seconds." At that moment, Sam's body glowed in Mercedes' hands and burst in a blinding white light, leaving his experience and recovery orbs.

HP: Fully Restored! (1694)

SP: Fully Restored! (496)

XP: +17500 (9975/12000)

David: Level up! (22 – 23)

HP: +48 (1694 – 1742)

SP: +13 (496 – 509)

STR: +7 (190 – 197)

DEF: +3 (158 – 161)

SPD: +7 (147 – 154)

SP ATK: +9 (157 – 166)

SP DEF: +5 (143 – 148)

LUK: +2 (103 – 105)

Mercedes grimaced and stood back up, "I know that…I just wanted to at least have that moment of cradling my dying boo in my arms."

"Damn, Merce…That's kinda screwed up…" Sam appeared, good as new right beside me, patting me on the shoulder in acknowledgement, making me flinch in surprise. He walked up to the irritated diva and wrapped an arm around her, "But I'm glad you got you have your moment, ever the mad black diva."

"Mhmm, that's right, Whitefish. But don't you ever go dying on me again, a'ight?" She punctuated her statement by punching him in the arm with a ring-studded fist, causing Sam to wince.

"Hey! Hey! Post-mortem here!" I shook my head at Sam in amusement, "Oh, hey, Karofsky—" I winced noticeably at the usage of my last name again,

"He prefers it if you call him David or Dave, Sam." Kurt appeared beside me and hugged my arm, I felt relieved at the warmth his body is radiating into mine.

"Oh, um…sorry there…David…Huh, gonna have to get used to that one. Anyways, since I kinda forgot what the lesson from this fight was supposed to be all about, I'm just gonna go ahead and say that things are cool between us!" He flashed a smile at me, making me smile back comfortably.

"Let's just say that I learned how to summon this kick-ass weapon, how about that?" I held up my hockey stick triumphantly and promptly dismissed it in a flash of light.

"Heh, good enough!"

"Even though I'm the one who taught it to him…" Kurt mumbled begrudgingly. I wrapped my arm securely around him, pulling him close,

"Yes, I didn't forget that, Fancy. Thank you." I smiled and planted a kiss on the top of his head, making him beam happily.

"*ahem* And?" Mercedes slapped the back of her hand on Sam's chest.

"Ugh…man, do I have to?" Sam lifted his arm off Mercedes' shoulders with a pleading look in his eyes.

"Yes. Look, I know how much you care about it, but you can definitely trust Teenzilla here with it." Mercedes smirked at me; my eye twitched at the new term of affection for me…So Finn's Frankenteen and I have to be frickin' Teenzilla? Ugh, FML…

"Well okay…" Sam walked up to me, pulled a locket out of his shirt and off over his head. "Here, as proof that you bested my epic Na'vi warrior skills, I'm giving you my most prized thing." He placed the tarnished bronze locket in my hand. Upon opening it, I saw a coiled wire…It's a…broken guitar string…

"It's one of the first strings I had on my guitar. My parents got me my guitar when I was 9 or something, anyways, playing it got me into my love for music. I must have gone through dozens of strings, so when that first one snapped, my mom put it in that locket for me to remember my beginnings in music."

I smiled tenderly at the loving memory in the palm of my hand and clutched it close to my chest, "Thanks, Sam. I promise to keep it safe for you."

"Heh, you'd better, or you'll have round 2 on your hands! WA-TAH!" Sam jumped into his best Bruce Lee impression, followed by Mercedes slapping him on the back of the head.

"Boy, stop acting crazy and carry my bags, school's gonna start pretty soon." I took out my cell phone and looked at the clock, damn…I've been out here training and fighting my ass off for the better part of 4 hours…

Sam straightened up and sheepishly took Mercedes' bags, along with his own. Santana stalked over with Brittany linked to her pinky, "Well well, looks like Trouty-mouth got whipped by Weezy."

"No, Tanna, Mercedes doesn't have a whip. It's obvious that she caught him with a fishing pole…" Brittany stated in all seriousness, making Santana scoff in irritation and Sam embarrassedly sucking in his big lips. A bout of laughter was shared between all of us, save for Sam, as it was at his expense. Mercedes hooked her arm in Sam's and proceeded to walk back to the school, followed by Santana and Brittany. Brittany briefly delinked from Santana and presented a familiar manuscript to Kurt,

"For you, Kurt!" She smiled brightly; Kurt took the manuscript, thanking the excited blonde before she skipped back to Santana's side. I quickly snatched the pages from my boyfriend,

"I'll take that, you don't need to see it…"

"Is it that bad, hun?"

"Ehh…" I awkwardly shook my head in a strange diagonal motion.

"Heh, well, thank you for saving me from having to read it, I'll get the Reader's Digest from you later…" He winked and playfully bit me through my shirt. I giggled uncharacteristically and lightly batted Kurt off of me. He offered me my backpack that I left at his house yesterday, which I shouldered gratefully. As Kurt was about to walk off as well, I caught him by the arm, I needed to tell him about what really happened between Santana and I…about Karofsky…I needed to let him know that there was still this latent…monster still living inside of me…

"Oh, can I talk with you just for a sec, babe?" He cocked his head concernedly, but nodded his head. "Hey guys, we'll catch up with you in a bit, alright?" I called back over to the others.

"Okay, we'll be waiting by the choir room!" Mercedes waved back to me, then going back to hitting Sam for jostling the stuff in her purse, Santana catcalls to us, thinking that we're gonna be getting it on in the field.

I turned back to Kurt and gazed upon his gorgeous face; I missed him dearly for the few hours we were apart, and the training made my desire to see him that much stronger. I grabbed the sides of his smooth cheeks and pressed my lips against his in a passionate embrace, the rising sun shining upon us, casting its warmth on our skin. Kurt let out a tiny moan before I pulled off, staring into his eyes; the glasz mixture looking even more vibrant in the lights of dawn.

Kurt licked his luscious cherry-tasting lips, eyes lidded dreamily, "Mm…Is that what you needed to talk to me about?"

I chuckled at how cute he's being, "Heh, no, I just really wanted to kiss my boyfriend." He smiled widely, "Umm, there's actually something important I need to tell you…I need you to promise me that you'll hear me out, okay?" I took hold of his hands firmly, his smile starting to shrink down but still focused intently,

"David, I told you, you can tell me anything. I'm your boyfriend, open communication is encouraged!"

I smiled somewhat with relief and took a deep breath, "Well, during my training with Santana, as you saw, you thought she was torturing me…"

"Yes, remind me to put bleach in her shampoo sometime…" Kurt squinted his eyes revengefully.

"*sigh* Part of it was torture, Kurt, but it was for a specific reason…I…have a…a dark influence or something in my mind. Something that manifests when I'm faced with a hopeless situation…It makes me do bad things, bullies people, hurts people, shuts the real me out from the rest of the world in a cage of fear…He's the one that threatened you and chased you out of here…You know him as 'Karofsky'…"

Kurt's eyes widened in fear and stepped back, releasing my hands. I quickly stepped forward and grabbed his hands again, tears pricking at my eyes, "Kurt, I assure you, I can keep him under control, but only if I know that you're here with me…" I pulled him into a tight hug, "Please Kurt…Don't go anywhere…"

Kurt firmly grasped my shoulders and gently pushed me back, scanning my eyes for any malice. "David…I'm always here for you, I'm not scared of Karofsky or what he can do, and as long as you're happy, he has absolutely no power over you…"

I breathed a heavy, shuddering sigh of relief, pulling my boyfriend (yay!) back into my chest, holding his head firmly in place. "Santana was trying to draw him out and have Brittany try to lock him even deeper in my mind, hopefully keeping him dormant forever…"

"And I take it that it backfired?"

"Horribly…Karofsky nearly took over completely. Back way when, when I was…not me, I was still an active player, but he took over most of the control in my body. But when I become the dormant one, when I'm no longer in control…I don't want to imagine what would happen if I weren't there to hold him back…" I nuzzled my face into the top of Kurt's head, breathing in his scent. "Things were looking bad when Munch tried to coax Karofsky out in the open…but you came…you called me back from the depths of my mind."

Kurt pulled off my chest to look into my eyes again, "And I'll always be there for you, and even when I'm not there physically, you'll still have something of mine to know that I am with you." He pulled away just enough to run his hand down my arm, stopping on the bracer he gave me after fighting Finn.

I smiled warmly at this perfect boy in front of me; I let a tear finally roll down my cheek. Kurt deftly pressed his lips against me cheek, catching the tear; he pulled my head down and lovingly pressed a kiss to each of my eyes. I opened my eyes to see him smiling tenderly back at me, I love this boy, truly I do…It's on my to-do list, right after beating NieR another 3 times to see all the endings.

"Thank you, Kurt…I…I'm in lesbians with you."

He raised an eyebrow confusedly but quickly softened his expression, understanding my sentiment and inability to say what I really meant right away, "Hehe…I'm in lesbians with you too, Dave." He stood up on the balls of his feet to catch my lips in a loving lock. After savoring our morning affections, he pulled off and walked a couple steps away from me before turning back around to face me, holding out his hand,

"Ready to face the world again, David Karofsky?"

I grinned widely and grasped his hand tightly, "Always, with you right beside me, Kurt Hummel."

He squeezed my hand in return as we walked back towards McKinley High with the shining golden sphere of light steadily rising in the background.

"Oh yeah, hun, I wanted to ask you…"

"What is it, Fancy?"

"What the hell is a 'Melted Karommel'?"

"Ehh…" I uneasily clenched the smutty manuscript in my free hand as we ventured back to the school, hand-in-hand.

---

Sitting atop the bleachers sat a visibly perturbed Blaine Anderson, his sinister eyes fixed adamantly on the happy couple. He drew his attention down to his left little finger, an ethereal red thread tied to it, the end of the string prematurely severed. His right hand glowing with a dark aura, he slammed his fist down on the bench seat beside him, making the entire section collapse in burst of splinters. Pulling his fist up to his face, he inspected the multiple splinters embedded in his knuckles, blood trickling down his hand.

"The game's only just beginning, David…I will sever your fate soon enough…"

---

We are now at the end of chapter 9, taking the title of 'longest chapter' from 'Walk, Walk, Fashion, Baby'! I'm having a whole lot of fun being able to write this story for all of you, my fellow pirates, I do hope that you're enjoying yourselves too! A lot of Santana's lines during the boot camp phase were taken from the movie Full Metal Jacket, and the cheesy taunts between Dave and Sam were from various action flicks...Hehe, both are quite the geeky pair...

Now, I cannot delve too far into things, but what I can tell you is that Blaine isn't just an evil dick, he's an evil dick with a tragic reason for being an evil dick. And as for 'Karofsky', he won't be staying locked up for too long, he's gonna have show up sometime to knock poor insecure Dave off his rocker and endanger his relationship with Kurt. Will these questions be answered, will there be more sexy-times, does this look infected to you? Stay tuned for the next episode of David Karofsky vs. the World! Once again, I humbly request: Please review! Much epic love to you all! ~Chris AKA ShonenOkami (^_^)