Olivia apperated directly from the Healer's office to the front steps of Grimmauld, sighing heavily. With any luck she'd be able to find a change of clothes and have a shower before the questions started. Deep down she knew that delaying informing Remus on what had happened, and more specifically why, would only make things worse, but she truly dreaded it. The house was quiet, but as expected Olivia found Remus fairly quickly relaxed in an armchair near the library window, newspaper outstretched over his lap. Hermione and Harry were sitting quietly near-by, Hermione obviously supervising the boy's homework. Harry was the first one to notice Olivia's entrance into the room, and gasp loudly at the sight of her blood-soaked uniform.
"Oh Gods, are you okay?" Hermione squeaked, looking up as well. Remus laid the newspaper aside and paled when he caught sight of her condition.
"Olivia!" he shouted, coming to her side at once. "Are you okay? What happened?" Olivia glanced toward the kids, then looked back to Remus.
"First off, yes. I'm fine." She sighed, feeling Remus' panic. "Can you give us the room?" she ask, glance once more toward Harry and Hermione. Harry nodded and set of at once, but Hermione hung back for a second. "I'll fill you in later, I promise." she said, knowing what Hermione was wanting. The younger witch nodded and she too left the room, pulling the door closed behind her. Olivia turned to Remus and smiled weakly.
"You could've said good-bye." she said, looking him over as he studied the blood on her clothes. Remus placed a hand on her back and gently started to guide her to a chair.
"You're changing the subject." He mumbled, and Olivia could hear him sniffing at her clothes. "I- This isn't just your blood, is it?" Olivia shook her head.
"You know the smell, I knew you would. The same way he smelled you on me." Olivia sighed and began to unravel the bandage on her arm.
"Fuck." Remus breathed out, causing Olivia a small shock. "This happened because of me, didn't it?" He ask, his voice raising. Olivia didn't say anything, but turned her arm over when the bandage was completely off. Remus gently picked her arm up to examine, then turned away in anger, kicking an ottoman in his rage, which flew across the room. Olivia jumped and sank back into her chair, scared not only of how much of his anger she could feel, but of how he was handling it. "The whole point in this bloody arrangement was to keep you safe. Damn fine job I've done of that." He continued to curse under his breath, occasionally throwing something he came across from a shelf. Olivia sat quietly and tried to relax herself, hoping some of it would pass through the bond and calm Remus as well. After a good ten minutes of pure rage, he seemed to settle down.
"It's always been a risk of my job, Remus." Olivia said calmly, watching him when he finally sat down. He cut his eyes over at her, pain very evident across his features.
"Nails or teeth?" he ask, as the wound was still fairly new and messy, it was hard to tell.
"Nails, I'm not infected." she responded calmly, as if it were an average question. She wanted to avoid getting him riled up again.
"Do you even know what is on your arm, Olivia?" he ask, bitterly nodding toward the offending wound. Olivia shook her head. "It's a claim, and in this case a challenge." Olivia felt a wave of nausea pass over her that she recognized wasn't her own. "Fenrir bites children with the hope that parents will hand them over to be raised in his pack, rather than having to deal with them theirselves. My parents wouldn't give, but he has spent years trying to make me and several others, people I'm sure you know, give and live more like animals than people, like he does. This," he lifted her arm, wincing when she did as the motion stung, "This is a challenge to me. It means that either I need to- Claim you. Or he will." Remus laid her arm back down and stood up, pacing back over toward the window.
"He wants you to mark me, doesn't he?" she ask quietly, looking toward the floor. Remus cleared his throat.
"Yes." he answered stiffly, watching out the window toward the street rather than turning to face his wife. Olivia stood and walked over, leaning onto the other window brace, watching him.
"Don't do it." she said sincerely, knowing that a werewolves only mark their mates, when they're one hundred percent sure they're in love. It is an incredibly intimate act, and is normally done in the heat of passion while the couple make love. Remus looked over toward her, tears pooling in his eyes. Olivia smiled sadly. "Really, I'm okay."
"He'll come back for you." Remus whispered. "I can't let him take you." Olivia looked down, thinking of a way to sooth the conversation.
"You don't love me, Remus." Olivia closed her eyes, the words surprising herself. She hoped he wouldn't notice that she chose to say that rather than 'we're not in love' to make her point. "Not that I ever expected you to, really. I just-" She stopped talked when he turned to face her.
"I should try harder for you, and I know that." he said, cutting off her thought. "And I shouldn't have left like that."
"Who is she?" Olivia interrupted. "You lied to me, and I need to know." Remus looked baffled for a moment, then saddened. "I deserve to know who you wish I was." she added, watching carefully.
"No, you're right." he said, nodding in agreement. "It's Nymphadora." he said, his eyes closed tightly. Aching filled Olivia's heart. "I don't wish you were her, Olivia. It's not about that."
"Do you love her?" she ask quietly, part of her dreading the answer, but she couldn't help the relief she felt when he shook his head.
"No, but I think I could have, had things been different." He said, guiding Olivia once more to sit down. She felt confused, and a bit guilty. "No, it has nothing to do with you. She left." he confessed, and Olivia felt horrible.
"Why couldn't you tell me that?" she ask, afraid to speak too loud, and that he may scare away again. He simply shrugged. "Listen, Remus, if we're going to do this, we could at least try. I don't really want to live so miserably. I'd like to be happy, and I think if you let me, I might could make you happy too." She hesitated, then took his hand in her own bandaged one. "I'm not asking you to fall in love with me, or even to try to see me that way. But as the law stands I will eventually mother your children, and I'd like to at least be friends." She looked up into his eyes, hoping he'd say something to make her feel less stupid for standing before him soaked in blood and begging for attention. Remus gave a small nod and Olivia smiled. "I'd like to go get out of this blood now, if that's alright with you." she smiled and walked away, leaving Remus confused.
Sirius caught Olivia just outside the library door, his eyes as large as saucers when he looked at her uniform. "What the bloody hell happened to you?" he asked loudly. Olivia shushed him and continued to walk, but Sirius followed. "I heard Moony pitching a mad fit." he added, stepping in front of her. Olivia rolled her eyes.
"Sirius, I'm covered in blood, I need a shower. Please move." she tried to step around but Sirius moved with her, blocking the path.
"Tell me what happened!" he insisted. Olivia let out a puff of frustrated air out her nose.
"Don't pretend you weren't listening in." she accused, watching a smirk form on Sirius' face.
"Alright, so I know what happened. And I know you know about Tonks." His face changed from smug pride to concern. "Are you alright?" he ask, holding her eyes, hoping that because she couldn't look away without being obvious she'd be less likely to lie to him about how she truly felt.
"Why would I not be?" she side-stepped the question and Sirius felt bad for her, for how sad she truly looked.
"Because each time it came up, you only said he didn't love you. You never mentioned not loving him." Sirius said, and Olivia's face burned. She pushed past him for the bathroom.
"I don't have time for this, Sirius." she mumbled, slamming the door behind her. Sirius sighed and thought to himself, No, but I've got all day. He slid down the wall opposite the bathroom and waited for Olivia to reemerge, dressed only in a towel. She scowled at him and walked away, once more with him on her heels.
"Talk to me, please." He begged, putting his arm in the way of the door that she was trying to enter.
"Why do you care?" she spat, eying Sirius suspiciously. Sirius gave a half smile.
"Because, Liv, Darling, You're married to my best friend. I'm like part of the package, and you have to deal with my meddling." Olivia let out a 'humph' sound and tried to move his arm, but Sirius buckled his elbow and leaned hard in place.
"Sirius, stop." she pleaded.
"Tell me you don't have feelings for your husband and I'll let it go." He said earnestly. Olivia broke eye contact and looked away, shaking her head.
"I'm not in love with him, Sirius." she said finally, looking back. Sirius' face showed full with sympathy.
"But you're afraid you might be, at some point, aren't you?" Olivia shivered as her skin started to dry from her shower, and she nodded.
"It doesn't matter, Sirius. It was never going to be me, anyway. He'll never see me." she moved once more to push into the bedroom to dress, and this time Sirius let her go. He saw the tears in her eyes and knew that something needed to be done, and also vowed to himself that he'd be much more open and honest with Hermione.
Yeah, this update is short and kinda feels-y. And for my Ronks lovers, don't hate me. They're my OTP, but for this prompt, Tonks had to go. I have another story that is all kinda Ronks goodness, if you'd like to check it out. Anyways- I hope you enjoyed this. Thanks for reading. As always, updates are fueled by reviews, so show that review button some massive love.