i'm baa-aaack! lol, due to a broken (fractured) wrist from snowboarding, i can't type very fast.. well, i cant type very well. i got around the fast part... but at any rate, i did get another chapter up from someone none of you expected!

flubber - i dont think maj. lorne has had a first name yet... like Walter...
1337StargateFan - i have to say, that was one of my favorites! and thank you!
Chiianna - just discovered! (gasps) just kidding, welcome aboard!
Christieanne-Anna - oh, he's coming, he's my "closer" sorta
Port-of-Seas - ooh... cadman might be next!
nightpheonix - bates... not a bad idea since hes not actually dead yet...
The Mythical Pen - hehehehehe! that is a great idea!
Estel Kenobi - well... i think grodin escaped the blast... hehe
tinkrbell225 - thank you very much and welcome!
McKayLover - oh yes, the Wraith will have their chance at this too!
drufan - the genii get to try their hand at writing their own Guide as well, eventually
Beach chickJASSNL - OH! i thot SNL might have stood for 'Saturday Night Live'...
Queen Tigeress - crazy is good! glad you like it
Jade Xianghua - well... i've been working on those mind-reading powers... you never know!
AFoE - thanks again!
fififolle - i tried to write it like lorne would talk, dry, smooth... that made no sense if u didnt know what i was talking about
futurechildfromatlantis - kavanaugh will be coming, i promise!
Timespirt - sry if it got confusing, its Colonel Sheppard
SilverRider - lol, the mystery reviewer! i shall have to read your SGA fic soon!
McRaider - thank you!
stevewraith - ah, the mind goes blank... mine did too... thank you for your kind words!

yikes, there seems to be more and more of you every time! i luv you all! there will be a special announcement for reviewers at the end of the chapter! PLEASE READ IT!

now... (drum roll) chapter 10!

Dr. Brown (Katie, with emphasis, to some) was often seen with her laptop perched carefully on her lap or some piece of equipment nearby. She was good at the balancing act. A few times, in her odder positions, she had caught Teyla staring at her in awe perhaps.

The doctor often used her computer for work and for catching up with old and new friends on Atlantis. One day, she was shocked to find her email flooded with chain mails from her friends, from forwarding lists… you name it, she had it or was on it. Sitting down, she read a few of the "Hitchhiker's Guides to the Pegasus Galaxy" that had been sent to her.

One had a note from her friend that stated: Hey, look! It's from your bf! Read, it's pretty funny… not kidding at all.

So, complying with her friend's wishes, she read on. Katie found many an interesting thing in the Guides relating to her current date. Granted, many snorts, laughs, and appreciative whistles came of out Dr. Brown that morning.

Yet everyone was picking on Rodney (or so it might seem) and she had to do something about it!

OOO

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Pegasus Galaxy for Lovers

1. Be careful who and what you fall in love with.

... a. It's Atlantis. It might be all romantic and stuff, but it's also in another galaxy. Use your imagination.

... b. There are a lot of scientists here – be careful what you get yourself into.

2. If you wanted a life of soap operas, go back to high school.

... a. If every time your loved one leaves you're going to make a huge production out of it, go away. We don't want your soppy kind here!

... b. Besides, in soap operas everyone gets cheated on. You want that?

Katie snickered softly yet evilly after writing that one down. She quickly covered her mouth, what was wrong with her? It must be the Hitchhiker Virus…

3. When out on a date, bring plenty of wine.

... a. One, so your date can loosen up around you.

... b. Two, if the Wraith attack, you won't quite remember it happening.

4. Make your date happy with offworld niceties.

... a. Just make sure there's no evil animal or disease inside your gifts.

... b. Therefore, check it yourself. If your date asks why you're sick, tell them you were risking your life for their birthday.

... c. It always works.

5. When something happens, make yourself look good.

... a. When you're telling a story to your date, ALWAYS make yourself look good.

... b. Even if all you did was fall into the dung that was lying on the side of the path in a ditch. Make it sound spiffy.

6. Fear the grapevine.

... a. If you cheat on your date, your date will find out in a matter of days, maybe hours.

... b. If you sleep in someone (of the other sex) else's quarters because your room was fumigated, it will come around as you doing something impossibly dirty.

... c. Anything even a little bit bad will come around in the worst possible way.

7. If your loved one happens to be on AT-1 or AT-2, don't expect much.

... a. They probably won't even be coherent for more than 150 days out of the year.

... b. If they are, then most of those days were probably spent in the infirmary.

... c. If the above two circumstances don't apply to your loved one, then they are probably so booked on paperwork that they can't spend time with you anyway.

... d. Don't expect much.

The red-haired doctor smiled. That should do it. A whole set of rules which every lover should abide by. Looking over her handiwork, she decided that the best course of action would be to send it out to all the lovers (including the secret ones) and see what would happen.

This would be fun.

hehe, someone you didnt expect!

ANNOUNCEMENT/NOTICE TO ALL REVIEWERS:

Read - I am working on all the people in Atlantis then the Guides will move OUT of Atlantis via the Gate and/or Daedalus... Here are the people that are left in Atlantis to do:

Cadman
maybe Bates
Kavanaugh
Sgt./Techie Canada
the Stargate

Once out of Atlantis, the order will probably be something like:

from the Atlantis gate...
an Ancient
Wraith
Genii
other species...

At the same time it leaves Atlantis via the Stargate, the Guides will leave via the Daedalus in about this order:

from Sgt. Canada...
Dr. Novak (hiccup woman)
Hermiod
SGC

Once back in the Milky Way, I will probably start another story called "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Milky Way Galaxy"

if you can think of ANY people not on this list, PLEASE PLEASE tell me!

Thank you for listening to this Public Service Announcement... now you can get on with your reviewing business! LOL

3/9/06