At the hospital, Jade rushed ahead of me, anxious to see his mother. I was in the room a few seconds after him. He had his hands clenched into fists at the edge of her bed, so tightly that his knuckles were turning white. I approached more calmly, standing at her side and taking her hand comfortingly.
"How are you feeling?" I asked, covering for Jade's painful lack of words.
"I feel much better now," she answered, "I'm stable, although they're not sure if I'll have another. For now, the doctor instructed me to eat healthier and exercise more."
"Mom, I don't feel comfortable about you living alone," Jade said quickly, "What if something happens when no one's around?"
She dismissed his worry with a wave of her hand. "I'm fine, honey," she said, "It's not a sure thing that I'll have another. I'll be healthier and then I think I'll be okay. Besides, you and Lucy come and visit me every day."
"What about when the baby's born?" he said, "We'll be too busy to go see you every day."
"Then I'll visit you every day," she said, "Everything will be fine."
He looked unsure but said no more. I gave her hand a gentle squeeze.
"When will they release you?" I asked.
"Soon," she said reassuringly, "since I'm already stable, they've no need to keep me any longer."
"That's great," I said, "Give us a call when they do so that we can pick you up."
"What's the point in leaving?" Jade said.
"You have work," I reminded him, "Plus I have some chores to do at home."
He sighed. "Take care of yourself, okay, mom?"
"Honey, if I can successfully raise a child, I can take care of my health," she said calmly, "Don't worry about me. Worry about the baby instead."
He sighed as I tugged at his sleeve. "Come on, Jade," she said, "You have to go to work soon and we haven't even had lunch yet."
"Actually, there's something I need to talk about with Jade alone," his mother said, "Could you please wait outside, Lucy?" I nodded and stepped outside. I walked slowly, my hands on my tummy as I approached the waiting room. I sat in a chair, my legs sore from having to carry around the baby inside of me, taking a deep breath to relax myself when I noticed someone else in the waiting room. He looked oddly familiar as he passed me, eying me with a lustful look in his eye, even as he gazed at the huge bulge of a baby I have in my womb. Feeling a bit nervous, seeing as I didn't have such a lovely past with men like this, I kept my gaze glued to the doorway where Jade would come through any minute now. I ran my fingers through my hair, watching and waiting. It seemed like hours passed before Jade finally came through, an expressionless look on his face as he approached me. He took my hand, helping me to my feet as he held it tightly.
"What did she say?" she asked.
"I wish I could tell you," he said quietly, leaving the conversation at that. I didn't push it further as I followed him to the car, my hand firmly clenching his. I sat in the passenger's seat and he in the driver's seat.
The drive home was completely silent. I gazed out the window, wishing he would just get whatever he was worrying about now off of his chest. I sighed deeply, watching as the trees and houses seemed to be flying by until we reached our home. Not a word was said as I put together a lunch for the both of us while he sat at the kitchen table, his hands folded over each other as he gazed at them intently, almost as if he was wondering why they were there. Normally when he didn't have anything else to do, he helped me make breakfast but it was quite obvious he wasn't feeling up to it now. I set the table and was just about to sit beside him when Jade took my wrist. He suddenly pulled me into a firm embrace, burying his face in my hair.
"I'm so glad I have you, Lucy," he murmured, "I love you so much, okay? I will never take you for granted or lie to you or wrong you in anyway. Don't ever leave me, okay?"
I couldn't stifle my chuckle. "Where's this coming from?" I said softly, returning the hug.
"I just wanted to make sure you knew," he said.
"I've known for years now," I reassured, kissing his cheek tenderly.
He released me and ate slowly, doing little more than nibble on his food; meanwhile I was finished with mine in minutes. I set my plate in the sink and returned to the table, setting my elbows on the table and my face in my palms as I watched him.
"What's wrong?" I asked quietly, "I don't want to force you to tell me anything if you don't want to, but it would still be nice to know so I can try to help you."
He just shook his head. "There's nothing you can do," he mumbled, shrugging, "Nobody can do anything about it."
"But I want to comfort you at least," I said, touching his hand.
"Just… don't leave," he said, "That's comfort enough for me."
I sighed. This conversation was going nowhere. "Well hurry up and eat," I said, "You have to go to work soon."
He took his plate to the sink anyways and hurried upstairs. I sighed again, cleaning up after him as I rubbed my belly.
"Maybe you'll make it so these things don't happen, Lily," I murmured.
I was going for a walk, admiring the sunset as I strolled through the local park. It was a bit windy, but it felt nice, considering how hot it was earlier in the day. I took a deep breath, caressing my belly. It was a lovely day. I was just admiring my surroundings when I heard a loud pop. Was that a gunshot? I gasped as I heard a couple of others when I realized they were flying right past me. I jogged away as fast as I could while carrying. I panted as I reached the house, rushing inside. I leaned against the door, my eyes closed. Were they aiming for… me? I nibbled nervously on my lip as I locked all the doors and windows, closing all the curtains as well. I sat upstairs in Jade and my bedroom, closing the door and locking it as I crouched on the side of the bed facing the door, as the window was on the opposite side. The only reason I took so many precautions was because this kind of thing was common when I was younger as I lived in the more violent side of town; I've witnessed drive-by's and murders, but the thing is that nobody except for the boss I was freed from when I was sixteen has ever aimed a gun at me. That's why this was such a shock.
I stayed there, curled into a fetal position against the bed when I heard footsteps coming up the stairs. I froze, gazing at the door as the footsteps came closer. The doorknob rattled before there was a knock.
"Lucy?" Jade said, "Are you in there?" Relief came over me so suddenly that I almost forgot to open the door. His house keys rattled in his hand as he studied me. "What's wrong?" he asked, "You don't usually lock the door, or close the curtains, let alone locking yourself in our room."
I opened my mouth, about to tell him the events of today without hesitating but then I paused. He was keeping secrets from me; why should I be so open to him? Although today left me trembling and terrified for my life, I still didn't think it was fair if he was keeping things from me. I closed my mouth slowly, shaking my head. "It's nothing really," I said, shrugging. He continued studying me, a skeptical look on his face.
"It doesn't look like nothing," he said, his gaze wandering to the curtains I'd closed earlier, "Your face is pale and you've completely shut yourself out from the outside world, plus," he lifted my hand, which I noticed was still trembling, "you're shaking."
I shook my head. "It was nothing, really," I said, taking my hand back, "I forgot to make dinner. We can order out, if you want."
He still looked curious, but he nodded. "I'll order some pizza," he said.
"Okay," I agreed.
After dinner, we returned to the hospital. Jade's mother murmured things to comfort him from the thing I don't know about as I sat down in a chair. My legs and back ached from the run I was forced into earlier. Jade still didn't know anything about it and I wasn't planning to tell him any time soon; unless it got too bad, that is.
I watched as Jade and his mother whispered to each other and I sighed, feeling out of the loop. I thought I was family too, here, considering I was carrying Jade's daughter. I didn't want to pry; I just thought that by now, it would be nice if we weren't keeping secrets from each other. I glanced at the clock every so often. I loved to visit Jade's mother, but I felt like a third wheel. I ran my fingers through my hair, getting to my feet.
"I'm going to get something to drink from the vending machine," I said, which was clearly unheard by either of them. I sighed, going anyways. I found the vending machine quickly and bought myself a water bottle before turning, nearly running into someone. He looked familiar and gave me a glare.
"Hey," he said, "Want to see my car?"
I shook my head quickly. "No thanks," I said, turning back towards Jade's mother's room. The man grabbed my wrist suddenly and I turned back, attempting to pull away my wrist but he was squeezing too hard. I struggled harder but he only tightened his grip until I felt a sharp pain. I gasped and he let go quickly, hurrying away. I rushed back to the room, rubbing my wrist. Jade glanced back at me as I entered and I felt somewhat glad to be acknowledged.
"Come on, Lucy," he said, "It's getting late; let's go."
I opened my water bottle before approaching him, weaving my fingers through his.
"Bye, mom," he said softly, "I'll see you tomorrow."
"Bye, sweety," she said, "Lucy, take care of yourself, honey. I want to see Lily."
I gave her a grateful smile. "I will mom," I said, "See you tomorrow."
As we approached the waiting room, Jade stopped suddenly. I lifted my gaze to him to see that he was gazing at my wrist.
"What's this?" he asked. I gazed down at it to see bruises of the man's hand. My gaze swept the room quickly to see that the man wasn't around; he must've left.
"Oh, nothing," I said quickly, "I… fell."
"It looks like a hand," he said, "Who did this to you?"
I shook my head. "Look, Jade, it's nothing, really," I said, "If I was really worried about it, I would tell you."
"I'm worried about it," he said, "Don't keep secrets from me, Lucy."
"You're the one keeping secrets, Jade," I said, furrowing my brow.
"It doesn't involve me getting physically hurt," he pointed out, "Tell me who did this."
"I don't know," I said, "I don't know who he was."
"You don't think it was," he said slowly, "someone with that guy?"
I shrugged. "I really don't know," I said. He sighed.
"Not this again," he muttered and we began approaching his car.