Warning: Awkwardness, Sexual Content & Crude HumourHumour
Alternate Universe (AU)
Chapter Ten
Texting Woes
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Hi Sasuke, this is Tenten. I saw your penis for sale on Craigslist. Is it still available?
Message sent: Jan 06, 11:03 a.m.
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If so, I would like to come take it for a test drive sometime next week.
Message sent: Jan 06, 11:05 a.m.
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Hi Tenten, thank you for contacting Akatuski Auto. I'm selling a Prius. Is that what you meant?
Message received: Jan 06, 11:47 a.m.
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YES! Apologies! New phone!
Message sent: Jan 06, 11:53 a.m.
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Well it's Craigslist. You never know ;)
Message received: Jan 06, 11:54 a.m.
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OoOoOoOo
A sweltering blanket of air enveloped the Café in the rich aromas of fresh coffee and baked goods. The ceiling fans were on, moving just enough to keep the palpable scent throughout the room; it did nothing to lower the temperature however.
The front of the counter was opened, revealing an array of delicious-looking baked goods exhibited in the glass shelve layer by layer along with a set of coffee cup samples illustrating different sizes.
The noise from the traffic outside filters in under the door slit—Lorries making deliveries, clattering and banging as the drivers empty their cargo without a care. The street seems to be getting busier. The café in comparison was empty. It was a rather slow day. There was only one customer—a man, seated in a corner of the room, his coffee cup in one hand and a newspaper in the other. The other empty tables were either strewn with cups and packaging or simply empty.
Tenten—pencil in hand—doodled on the notepad before her on the counter. She cast a wary eye around the shop, a metallic table reflecting the sun almost blinded her for a second. Occasionally she would busy herself wiping imaginary coffee spills off tables and ironing out the equally non-existent creases in her apron. Did Anko really expect a coffee shop to make plenty sales when it was fucking 44 degrees Celsius out and they didn't have air conditioning or even sold cold beverages?
Sighing, she reached into the broad pocket of her apron and retrieved her buzzing cell phone.
It was a reminder about her arrangement to meet up at Akatsuki Grill and Bar—another one of the Akatsuki's establishments around town—so she could take her new Prius for a test spin. She held the phone to her chest and squealed in delight. Her days of public transport were finally coming to an end. She had finally saved up enough money for a secondhand vehicle.
While it might not be flashy, in her eyes the Toyota Prius was an icon—the highly aerodynamic, high-roofed, five-door, mid-size hatchback remains the most fuel-efficient gas-powered car sold in Konoha. And one was about to become hers for a very reasonable sum.
But the memory of that horrible typo completely overshadowed her excitement. Bitter humiliation and resentment seared through her because she actually knew the person who had been on the receiving end of it.
Uchiha Sasuke.
And there was no way that he wouldn't have found humour in her text, especially considering what happened between them in the past.
She remembered that stolen night five years ago—hard, hot kisses in the silence of his room and the thick, hard length beneath his jeans. It made her body heat alarmingly, remembering his touch. His hands, work roughened on her breasts.
Between her thighs.
She had been twenty-two years old and frightened out of her wits—seduced out of it too. She remembered his fingers, sliding through thick moisture, his voice humming with approval as they penetrated, then stopped at the evidence of her innocence.
They dated throughout their high school years. He had been her first everything—first crush, first kiss, first boyfriend, first love, so it only seemed natural that he was to be her first lover too. They were after all, engaged to be wedded.
His mouth.
Her eyes closed as she remembered that hot, seductive mouth and the fear that washed over her as he threw her into her first and only orgasm. He had lapped at the rush of moisture, holding her hips still as his tongue dipped into her core penetrating her, eating her decadently.
His mouth had been hot, his tongue voracious, the sounds of his pleasure vibrating against her sensitive folds in a manner that had her crying out in bliss over and over again.
But then he was rising above her—big, powerful, looming figure and the fear consumed her. It had truly terrified her—the intensity of her passion—the raw almost animalistic instincts she felt—what awaited her on her marriage bed. It had been too much; she wasn't ready for that sort of life so she fled the scene with her tails between her legs.
She had her whole life ahead of her, Tenten had told herself when she returned his engagement band. Settling down with the three or four kids he had envisioned for them was not a part of the life she had wanted for herself, at least not yet—and especially not when Sasuke was only rushing into things because of a clause in his father's will.
Neither of his sons would inherit a single thing up until the time of their marriage and whoever tied the knot first would receive Uchiha Enterprise.
Tenten supposed it was just Fugaku's way of encouraging competition and the continuation of the Uchiha clan. But Itachi showed no remote interest in marrying and taking over the family's ventures. Those had always been Sasuke's interests and he purposely held off seeking out a lifetime partner so his younger brother would first him down the aisle and claim the majority of their family property.
She was told however, that shortly after she broke things off with Sasuke the company fell under the control of Madara Uchiha. Despite his inexperience, had she married Sasuke, Itachi could have ran things on his behalf until he learned the tricks of the trade.
In some way she supposed her cynicism had cost him everything he had ever wanted in life; herself included and she had had to live with her guilty conscience as company over the years.
Composing herself, Tenten shoved aside the memories. According to what she'd think of as a credible source, Sasuke was currently dating and an engagement could very much be in his near future, so he was only fingertips away from snatching his family fortune. Yet again.
He had had no problem forgetting her—evident in the long list of women he had been reportedly seeing. Unlike her, who had had only one serious relationship since. One she wished she could just forget.
Enough with these thoughts, she steeled her mind. She would just have to stick out whatever awkwardness may surface during their encounter. A deal like his would not be coming around anytime soon, especially for such a relatively new car.
Trembling with excitement over her Prius, Tenten decided to ask Ino a favour and let her in on the big news.
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Hey Ino can you lick my shit up on Saturday. I'll be busy test-driving the penis of that guy I told you about.
Message sent: Jan 10, 1:20 p.m.
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Are you high Tenten? What the fuck? (-_-)
Message received: Jan 10, 1:22 p.m.
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I meant "pick up my shift" OMG I'm so sorry. Autocorrect has been giving me a hard time lately. Grrr! This fucking iphone!
Message sent: Jan 10, 1:30 p.m.
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Yeah well, no biggie! I'd gladly pick up your shift if it gets you laid :) So…who is this guy you're blowing off work to go hook up with? I didn't know you were so sex-starved.
Message received: Jan 10, 1:32 p.m.
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She arched a brow. Sex-starved? Was there such a thing?
A group of older woman entered the coffee house, closing the door behind them and locking out the heavy smell of exhaust fumes from outside. Tenten motioned for Temari to go tend to them and said girl growled, fixed her face into a false smile and went over.
She pulled a pencil from behind her ear and went through the routine questions they were all trained to ask every customer who visited the café. And she did this while chewing her gum noisily—between each fucking word.
Tenten sighed deeply and returned her attention to her phone, frowning. Apparently Ino didn't have to physically be around to be a pain in the ass.
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That was a typo too. I meant test-drive his Prius. I am buying a car! Geez Ino.
Message sent: Jan 10, 1:37 p.m.
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Oh. How boring (-_-)
Message received: Jan 10, 1:40 p.m.
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She blanched, not certain that sort of comment warranted a response.
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Didn't you have dinner plans with Neji tonight? Have you cancelled them?.
Message received: Jan 10, 1:45 p.m.
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The brunette rolled her eyes inwardly. Ino was terribly nosey when it came to her relationship with Neji. She had the ridiculous notion that they were dating, despite neither of them having outrightly hinted any particular interest in anything out side their platonic bond. There was a time when Tenten was heads over heel in love with him, but that was a story for another time.
She tapped hastily away at her phone screen, deftly avoiding the watchful eyes of Anko, who had come out front to snatch a few mints from one of the jars on the display.
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Are you keeping tabs on me now? And yes, I have cancelled our reservations. I told him to come over for dinner instead. I have some really tasty treat in my panty that I can't wait for him to try.
Message sent: Jan 10, 1:50 p.m.
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I don't doubt it ;)
Message received: Jan 10, 1:52 p.m.
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Just be sure that the guy you plan to ride doesn't eat it all ;)
Message received: Jan 10, 1:53 p.m.
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Tenten stared dumbfounded at the device. She would've been repulsed, except she hadn't a clue what the blonde was getting at.
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Huh?!
Message sent: Jan 10, 2:00 p.m.
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Reread what you just sent me :)
Message received: Jan 10, 2:00 p.m.
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Omfg! I meant in my PANTRY!
Message sent: Jan 10, 2:01 p.m.
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Oh...I'm sure you have nice treats in there as well ;)
Message received: Jan 10, 2:03 p.m.
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Tenten made a face, pinching the bridge of her nose in disgust. She had a feeling she would not be living down this moment anytime soon, Ino would make certain of that.
She hesitated before replying.
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Smh. You are shameless. Anyways, the cafe is dead today; we've only made a handful of sales. It looks like a raise isn't in my near future :(
Message sent: Jan 10, 2:04 p.m.
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Are you still planning to take that job downtown?
Message received: Jan 10, 2:05 p.m.
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I haven't actually applied yet. You know how it is with those kinds of jobs. You've got to be on top of your game in order to land an actual interview. I still have to prepare my rectum. It's been a while since I've had to use it…
Message sent: Jan10, 2:06 p.m.
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If it makes you uncomfortable you don't have to use it, there are other options...
Message received: Jan10, 2:07 p.m.
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What other options?
Message sent: Jan 10, 2:08 p.m.
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Your mouth and "pantry" lmfao!
Message received: Jan 10, 2:14 p.m.
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Tenten was confused and a little offended by what she deduced from Ino's use of her "pantry" typo.
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I would never screw my way into a job if that's what you are getting at.
Message sent: Jan 10, 2:14 p.m.
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I thought that was the name of the game... I mean... why else would you need to prepare your rectum for a job?
Message received: Jan 10, 2:15 p.m.
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A wave of icy cold horror crept over her as the import of what she had blindly texted sunk. Grimly Tenten stared at her phone screen, too shocked to react for a moment.
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Damn it! I meant prepare my Résumé! Exactly what kind of job do you think I was talking about Ino!?
Message sent: Jan 10, 2:19 p.m.
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You tell me Tenten ;)
Message received: Jan 10, 2:22 p.m.
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I need a new phone (-_-)
Message sent: Jan 10, 2:23 p.m
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OoOoOoOo
The bar was crowded, the music pulsing. The crush of bodies on the dance floor moved in a strange synchronization that amazed Tenten. After nearly half an hour of hiding in the shadows—because she didn't want to risk being spotted in a place like this—she decided fuck it, and approached the bar.
"What can I get you lil'missy?" asked a white-haired, male bartender as she settled herself on the stool directly in front of where he was wiping up a few sake spills.
"A cold beer and Sasuke Uchiha," she declared brusquely, tapping impatiently on the countertop. "I know he frequents this place."
The man's tone was like silk drawn over sandpaper when he asked, "And exactly who the fuck are you?"
"Tenten," she shrugged casually.
"I see…" his pink eyes twinkled with recognition and mockery when he leaned over the counter—invading her personal space. Seeing her flinch, he exhaled loudly and called over his shoulders. "Oui Deidara! Tell Sasuke that the woman who's interested in test driving his dick is here."
Shock forced her words out in a torrent of enquiry. "How do you—? It was a fucking typo!" she paused, and raised her right hand to the side of her head. The man watched her dig her fingers into her temple before continuing. "I cannot believe Sasuke shared that! Did he—? How did you see it?"
"You texted the shop's mobile, not Sasuke's private number." He informed her coolly, setting a chilled bottle in front her. "Trust me…we all had a good laugh."
Tenten picked up the cold drink, lifted it to her lips and sipped. The bitter bite wasn't pleasant, but she knew the much-needed salve to her nerves would be welcome when it hit. She felt utterly humiliated.
Her eyes flickered to his, then back to the bottle. "So you work at Akatsuki Auto too?" she asked as if she hadn't figured that much.
He nodded.
For want of something else to do other than suffocate in shame, she pulled out her cell phone and decided to check on Neji's progress. She promised him that she would be back in time to help him with the preparations for Hanabi's bake sale. The young Hyuuga and her club was trying to raise money for women with breast cancer—the disease that took her mother away from them.
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Hey Neji, how are Hanabi's Girl Scout pussies coming along?
Message sent: Jan 14, 7:33 p.m.
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Have you been drinking?
Message received: Jan, 14, 7:37 p.m.
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Tenten looked guiltily at her beer bottle then back at her phone.
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What's makes you think that?
Message sent: Jan 14, 7:38 p.m.
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Please reread your first text
Message received: Jan 14, 7:39 p.m.
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She choked and almost spat beer all over the counters. Spinning around to face the limber bodies on the dance floor, she rested her back on the edge of the counter and crossed her legs.
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I meant COOKIES! How are the COOKIES coming along?
Message sent: Jan 14, 7:42 p.m.
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I figured ;) The first batch was terrible. I think poor Hinata-sama might have broken a tooth on one. Texture improved with the second batch; however the taste was rather bland.
Message received: Jan 14, 7:45 p.m.
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Did you add the secret ingredient like I told you?
Message sent: Jan 14, 7:54 p.m.
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What secret ingredient?
Message received: Jan 14, 7:55 p.m.
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Vaginal Extract.
Message sent: Jan 14, 7:56 p.m.
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Excuse me?
Message received: Jan 14, 7:58 p.m.
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OMG VANILLA*
Message sent: Jan 14, 8:00 p.m.
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Duck autocorrect
Message sent: Jan 14, 8:00 p.m.
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*fuck autocucumber
Message sent: Jan 14, 8:00 p.m.
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That's it. I am getting a new phone (-_-)
Message sent: Jan 14, 8:01 p.m.
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Tenten swallowed, her throat tight as a leash. That was just plain awkward. Before she could send off an apology to Neji a figure came into her eye-line. Tall, male and striding towards the bar through the crowd.
Her breath caught in her throat.
When his eyes lighted on her—they pinned her as if she were on a dissecting board—he stopped dead. His face might have been carved from stone.
"That's Itachi Uchiha, Sasuke's brother," the bartender announced, she felt his breath on her ear.
"I know…" she muttered breathlessly. In a second she made her decision. She got up and travelled the distance to where he was standing. This wasn't a confrontation that she had been looking forward to but thought she might as well get it out of the way. "Hello Itachi," she greeted politely.
"It's nice of you to drop by," he drawled, and the menace in his voice vibrated like a warning.
"Is Sasuke around? We had an arrangement regarding—"
He silenced her with a single, sharp gesture of his hand. It seemed his natural authority had increased a hundredfold since the last time she had seen him. Or perhaps it had something to do with his newfound hatred of her.
He looked dangerous. His face was drawn and watchful. Those beautiful eyes with their sweeping lashes now had dark hollows beneath them.
Tenten was horrified. She could feel waves of resentment flowing from him when his hand clamped heavily around her forearm. But she had to pull herself together. Over the past couple of years she had survived a lot, but much of it had not been of her own making. Itachi's cold fury was a different thing altogether. This was entirely down to her, so she would just have to put a brave face on it. Obviously he hadn't forgiven her for walking out on his brother years ago.
"The deal is off, I'll escort you out." His voice was as grim as his face, and as he spoke.
She managed to keep her voice calm, but her mind was in chaos. "What is this about?"
He halted, grazing his lower lip with his teeth. "Every time you come into our lives you take something."
She had a hunch he wasn't just talking about the car and Tenten wasn't too thrilled about having the past drenched up.
Pained, she turned her head away. She could not afford to let him see how much it still affected her. "You make it sound as if I'm not paying for the vehicle," Tenten argued faintly.
With a scoff he steered her outside, into the cold night air.
She shivered.
Once the club door slammed behind them Itachi released her, his eyes burned into her like glowing coals.
Emotion swirled inside her and she felt the pressure build up in her chest as though it would explode. Vaguely, she heard the hushed note of an engine, the soft clunk of a car door and then footsteps on the pathway.
His low laugh was a dry, humourless sound. "Don't play dumb, you know damn well that I'm not talking about material things."
Tenten coloured and shot at him witheringly, "I was merely Sasuke's meal ticket to your father's fortune if that's what you're getting at!" It was the lie she had told herself for years.
"Any other girl might have been. You never were—"
She froze at the sound of that dark, male voice. There was no mistaking the rough timber of it—it stroked over her. The breath stilled in her chest, bird wings, not butterflies, beat at her stomach.
She shuddered, this was what terrified her about the damn man; the effect he had on her.
"—but don't kid yourself Tenten, we both know that wasn't the real reason you ran away."
Tenten swallowed past her nerves and turned around, allowing her eyes to rove over the incoming form. The dark hair was a little longer than she remembered, brushing the collar of his shirt. It was black, glistening like midnight silk.
Tall and well muscled—a perfect male in his prime. His body shown off to perfection in the snug jeans he wore, and the gray striped, cotton dress shirt. A wide leather belt circled his slim hips and hard stomach.
Brown eyes ventured daringly lower.
Long, masculine legs, she noted and felt her stomach bunched, tightened. Those legs led to muscled thighs that framed a more than impressive male bulge.
Tenten swallowed again—
She felt her breathing deepen as something she hadn't felt in years lanced through her body. It was like a mild electrical shock being sent through her entire system.
—She knew exactly how impressive that bulge actually was.
She shook her head, fighting the betraying weakness that assailed her. She needed to get it together.
"Apparently you know something that I don't," Tenten forced herself to meet Sasuke's gaze, saw the measuring, considering look there.
"You know it alright, whether you chose to accept it is however up to you," there was a thread of amusement in his voice. "Its fine Itachi, I'll take it from here." He sounded so smooth, so reasonable—but Tenten's hackles did not go down.
She didn't want to be alone with him, she realized in panic. That cautious, frightened, little part of her kept screaming at her to run away because the memory of that night five years ago; the incompleteness of the act was driving her mad with the ridiculous need to finish it.
Would it finally grant her the closure that she desperately needed? she wondered dazedly.
Who was she kidding? What made her think she was any braver now than she had been then? That she was any more accepting. What made her think Sasuke would even want to touch her now, an older version of that scared little girl, helpless in the face of her own passions and the fears that made her run?
Tenten swiped at the fringe of long bangs that drifted over her forehead and watched Itachi's retreating figure disappeared behind the door.
She ran her tongue over her lips and wanted to whimper. Sasuke's eyes followed each movement she made. When it disappeared into her mouth once again, his eyes rose slowly to meet hers.
She was caught.
Trapped like a deer by a bright light, helpless, bound by the sheer sexuality he exuded. It vibrated through her system, soaking into the pores of her skin until she felt sensitive, overheated.
She still wanted him and he knew it. Tenten could see that knowledge in the heavy lidded, dark look he gave her before he led the way to his Prius. He could feel it, just as she could. Like a physical wave of energy coming off them both.
He moved fast. He jerked the door to the vehicle open and helped her quickly inside before closing her door carefully and moving quickly to his own. The car started and within seconds he was pulling out of the club's parking lot and onto the road.
Heavy intent lined his expression, tautened his powerful body. They rode in silence for a few minutes before Tenten realized the ache in her body only grew. Grew until it was hunger, a need, something she was terrified she would never be free of.
Maybe it was the beer.
"I thought I was supposed to be test-driving this thing," she breathed out roughly.
Sasuke frowned at the aroused rasp in her voice. "You don't want to be test-driving this car, Tenten," he smirked, remembering that shy, hungry look she had given him went she first laid eyes on him. "Not really, do you?"
"Don't try to be cute," she gasped.
When he looked over at her, her soft, golden brown eyes were widened in shock, her face pale in the dimly lit confines of the car. The silken sweep of chestnut hair was in disarray around her face, falling to her shoulders in tawny waves of splendor that begged him to reach out and touch.
"You made it all too clear in your text message," he growled, fighting the need to touch.
Anger lined every curve of her body and vibrated in her soft voice. "That was a typo!"
Flushed with indignation, Sasuke could feel the waves of anger pouring off her. "Initially, it might have been," he told her softly, pointedly. "Still scared, Tenten?"
He had no idea just how scared. She trembled beneath his look, remembered the lava-hot sensations that poured through her body so many years ago. The loss of control, the desire, the need to give this man whatever he wanted, any way he wanted it.
It was terrifying.
"I was never scared," she whispered, staring straight ahead.
"Then why did you run away?" he bit out from between clenched teeth as he swung the car to the side of the road. He pulled in behind an outcropping of boulders with a swerve of the wheel that had her gasping in surprise. "You knew about my father's clause long before I asked you to marry me."
Tenten was quiet for a moment pulsing with lust. She was riding an edge, close to the barrier of common sense and insanity where her lust for this man was concerned. "You were asking too much of me," she shrugged.
Why was she shaking?
The Prius rocked to a stop as Sasuke covered the distance between them shoving her seat back, dropping the back to rest against the back seat, and ignoring her gasp of alarm as he kneed her thighs apart and rose over her.
His lips were warm, his breath moist and caressing as a hand framed her face, tilting it so he could stroke his lips under her jaw.
His soft laughter raced through her blood stream, pooling between her thighs as the muscles clenched in arousal. "I asked nothing of you that your body hadn't demanded of my own."
She couldn't stop her hips from lifting against him when he pressed his jean-covered length against the softness of her lower belly. She couldn't stop her strangled cry when his lips finally covered hers heatedly.
He took her mouth as though he needed her taste to survive. His lips moved over hers, his tongue stroking past them, tangling with hers as he groaned against them. His strong fingers seared her flesh as he stroked the skin of her outer thigh, and the way his thigh tucked itself between the bared flesh of hers sent a feminine thrill of sexual heat pulsing through her body.
"Stop," Tenten drew back, suddenly frightened. "Sasuke what are you doing?"
His face was flushed, his eyes glittering behind heavily lashed lids. "I'm giving you the test ride you requested." He jerked the dress to her waist as his lips went to her neck, drawing the flesh between his lips, licking erotically, biting at her skin with hot, desperate nips. "We're a package?"
She couldn't think. What test ride? She felt her panties tear. She heard the rip of the material as his lips covered hers harshly, his tongue sweeping in possessively as his fingers pushed between her thighs.
She stilled. Breath suspended, eyes opened wide in disbelief, she stared at him as his fingers plunged inside her. Tenten cried out harshly, wondering if she should be ashamed that she was so wet, so desperate that the sticky fluid seemed to gush over his fingers.
"What are you talking about?" She couldn't stop her incredulous whisper.
"The Prius and my—" he was breathing roughly as stared at her.
"—I'll take them both," she cried out, mortally ashamed of the clawing need that had her humping his thigh with tight, desperate movements.
"Are you sure?" he growled against her lips. "There's a no return policy,"
She whimpered, a small sound of longing and confusion. "On the Prius or—"
"—both," strangled and tortured, a groan ripped from his throat. His fingers moved deeper, making her hotter, wetter. "It's up to you."
She couldn't stand it. Tenten felt her knees weakening as the pleasure rose inside her. It gripped her stomach, tightening it almost painfully as the waves of near ecstasy washed over her again and again. Her hands were clenched on his shoulders, her thighs spread wide.
"I hope you're both durable," she could barely speak; the need pulsed so heavy in her body.
He smirked slow and sure, approval reflecting in his expression. His fingers pulled free of her body with a slow, regretful motion. "I've endured five long years without you—"
His kiss, on the cusp of her shoulder, was as soft as velvet. Tenten's heart stopped beating.
"—only another one of those empty years could test my durability," he looked hard, arrogant, and as self-assured as ever. And yet so achingly sincere. "Trust me love, my Prius will serve you longer than Toyota's."
Tenten laughed.
A/N: I don't know if anyone got the last line…but Sasuke was basically saying he's more durable than her car. Haha car parts can be replaced so I don't know what he's talking about lmao xD
Thanks for reading. Reviews are always appreciated.