OUTSIDE HOUSE

"Alright birdies, Dan the man is here, time to get going somewhere else."

Daniel had conceived a plan that if he threw pebbles at the birds on Jacks roof, they would be easily scared off. However it was having the opposite effect. The more Daniel threw rocks at them the more birds showed up. Daniel was getting frustrated every minute. He decided to give up and go back inside the house. What he saw when he came back left his mouth wide open.

All the birds that Daniel had tried to shoo away had converged into the hole to get away from Daniel's pebble throwing. Several birds were flying in the living room swooping down at Jack, Teal'c and Cam. Sam and Vala heard the commotion and came out of her room.

Sam was shouting. "Jack! Jack! "What's going on?

"I think they're birds in the house honey."

"I can see that, why are they in the house?"

"Ask our resident genius Daniel. He was outside trying to get the birds off the roof, now there in my house. Daniel? Jack asking sarcastically. "Why are there birds in my "Bird man from Alcatraz", why, why, why?"

"I didn't do anything, I just threw a few rocks at them and more of them came; I guess they were trying to get away from me."

"Oh, that was brilliant Danny boy."

Vala chimed in. "Uh, Jack, they seem to be after something on the floor, what are those little white things on the floor?"

"Yes Jack." Said Sam. "What are those little white things?"

"Oh, Ah, I think they're marshmellows. Hey I think I know why they're attacking us. It's the marshmellows, they're after the marshmellows guys."

"And to think they made you a General." Said Sam.

Daniel was shouting over the bird noises. "Teal'c, Cam do something man, these crazy birds are out of control."

Teal'c was standing stoic against the birds, for some reason they were not attacking him. Teal'c walked slowly over to Sam.

"Samantha, could you please direct me to your nearest sucking receptacle."

"What!

Vala interrupted. "I think he means your vacuum cleaner."

"Oh, down the hall and to the right Teal'c."

Sam was trying to maintain some ounce of composure while ducking the swooping birds. Vala was just shaking her head at all the men and thinking this just keeps getting better and better.

"Jack? I'll be in the room when you get done playing around and turn that football game off."

Sam and Vala returned to the room. Sam shut the door behind her and clung to the door knob.

"Vala?"

"Yesssssssss."

"Shoot me, shoot me now."

LIVING ROOM

Teal'c finally came back into the living room with the vacuum cleaner. Cam, Jack and Daniel were using pillows trying to keep from being attacked. Teal'c started sucking up all the marshmellows in the room; he went outside and dumped all the marshemellows on the lawn. All the birds inside and on the roof converged on the pile. Teal'c went back inside, put the vacuum back in the closet, came back outside and sat down.

Teal'c addressed they guys. "You may come out now, the birds have been dispersed."

Cam, Daniel and Jack peeked out from their pillows and looked around and saw that all the birds were gone.

"Well, that's what I'm talking about." Said Cam. "Teal'c you the man."

Daniel, Cam and Jack did a high five among themselves. Teal'c just sat quietly on the couch looking at the hole in the roof.