Parts (41-46)

VII

Chapter 10

Dark Days

Part 1: Bonding

Tobias Latimer felt an uncomfortable twinge as he walked by Molly's room, it was still hard to believe she'd been captured. They were trying to get her back, so far all they'd been able to figure out was that she'd been moved to England. On one hand it would make it easier to get to her but on the other they still needed to find out where she was to get to her, Heather did know a lot of useful information but England was the country she knew least about since people knew her there so she'd been kept away. She did know there was an unfortunate disconnect between the spies they followed and the people who'd be holding Molly, they liked to limit the information each knew to diminish the damage if one was caught or turned and spilled the beans. Also since Molly was Gray, they would be taking extra precautions because they'd expect them to be looking for her.

Varanian had said they had to be prepared for the worst. Logically Latimer understood, it made perfect sense and there were kids at the base but he still hated it. It made him feel like they were giving up on her by even considering they might not be able to save her and he didn't want to do that, she was his best friend. He wished Wyatt was still there too, as a lizard animagus he could get to places they couldn't and he alone could actually follow them – if he hid in their clothes or hair – if they went to new locations the odd time spies met up with regular Shadows who could very well be where Molly is. The Shadows did have a habit of changing locations, since some of them were known and wanted criminals – like Maverick Selwyn – Aurors were after them. The non-Shadow ones anyway. He just felt like if anyone would've been able to find her, Wyatt had the best chance.

He headed downstairs, hoping not see Leebin in the kitchen. Leebin had been tortured by the Shadows after all, tortured into insanity no less and remained a walking mess of scar tissue and missing fingers. Looking at the man just made him afraid for what Molly was going through, she was undoubtedly being tortured too. Knowing she was suffering just made it worse that they weren't finding her.

"I've told you before, Ron, no," Varanian was saying as Latimer reached the kitchen, ironically it tended to be the hub of activity due to its central location, "It's too risky."

Latimer saw the two men standing in the kitchen, Varanian was pouring a glass of water and had an assortment of random foods with him. Undoubtedly for Annie to try not set her off, her morning sickness was more like always sickness and she had trouble keeping even water down. And she still had seven months of pregnancy to go, it made him wonder how Olivia was doing as she was due to give birth soon or maybe already had and Albus just hadn't owled him yet. Ron was standing by him, Crystal was making scrambled eggs for breakfast. Ivy was drawing on the table, chatting away to John beside her. Bertie was also there, Hogan was looking at his eye or the gaping hole where his eye had been. Latimer tried not to cringe as Hogan poked around in hole, probably for a good reason but it nonetheless made him lose the little appetite he had.

"Okay fine," Ron agreed, holing up his hands, "I agree on Harry, he's not going to believe me without proof after what happened and with that bloody traitor in his ear but Hermione is my wife. I know I can convince her, she will believe me if I tell her what's happened."

"And what if she doesn't?" Varanian protested, "You're in no state to defend yourself, if she turns you in they'll probably kill you now you're a flight risk or capture you, torture our location out of you."

"I'm telling you, that won't happen," Ron insisted desperately as Varanian finished pouring the glass of water, "I know my wife."

"And it's great you have faith in her but it's not worth the risk."

"But-"

"Your niece was captured saving your life," Varanian told him harshly and the upset showed on Ron's face, "Don't throw that away."

"But she will believe me," Ron moaned unhappily but didn't move to follow as Varanian gathered up the glass and plate, leaving to go carry it back down to the basement room with Annie. He sighed heavily and glanced at Crystal – who happened to be closed to him - desperately, "You think she'll believe me, right?"

"I- I don't know," Crystal mumbled quietly, giving a semi-shrug, "People aren't always good to trust, Varanian is just trying to be cautious."

"I guess," Ron sighed and his eyes drifted to the almost finished scrambled egg Crystal, "Need some help? I'm starving."

"Okay, Bertie, looking good," Hogan announced as Ron started helping Crystal and Latimer went to pour himself a drink, he was thirsty, "Ready for a new eye?"

"What? Why is he ready for an eye but I'm not ready for a leg?" John wondered in confusion, distracted from his conversation with Ivy while Bertie nodded vigorously in response to Hogan.

"Different wound, different limb, kids heal faster. Take your pick, it's a combination of factors," Hogan answered dismissively as he took out a blue eyeball, his attention not drifting from Bertie, "But it shouldn't be that much longer if that makes you feel any better."

"I guess-"

The front door opened and Latimer shifted his focus down the corridor to see Roman walking in with Heather and Agnes, probably helping her practice her magic before breakfast as the girl was driven. They'd started teaching Bertie and Leebin's kids basic spells to, you could never be too cautious. Everyone chipped in, even Heather and Ron despite being new. Both were quite eager to help, Ron was in poor health after his imprisonment but Heather was incredible. She had won the Triwizard Tournament – hence being targeted to work for the Shadows – after all, the Shadows may be awful but they had trained her well. She was very talented and knowledgeable and beautiful… Latimer quickly averted his eyes, feeling his cheeks going hot. He shouldn't think such things.

"But why?" Roman was complaining of her, he'd been obsessively annoying about wanting to save his son ever since Heather had told them of Cyrus' placement at the Training Tower, "It'd be easy."

"When we target the Training Tower they're going to just start moving the kids, they have other schools – albeit not with such a strict regime – and plenty of buildings and land now to turn into another facility anyway," Heather explained shortly, "If we only save your son, we lose the chance to save the rest of the kids."

"How'd she do?" John asked with apparent interest about Agnes' progress, causing Roman to glower in frustration at the interruption.

"Excellent," Heather confirmed and Agnes smiled sheepishly with the half of her face that could anyway, he really felt bad for the kid.

"Good job, kid," John said of Agnes with a hint of a proud smile as she sat down with him, starting to tell him what they'd been doing.

"But my son is special, he needs to be saved-" Roman continued to complain before gagging, looking ill as Hogan pushed the prosthetic eye into Bertie's socket

"I'm sorry, Roman," Heather told him, Roman's malaise twisting with irritation, "Take it up with Varanian."

"You just don't understand because you don't have kids!" Roman scoffed irritably as he turned to leave, glancing briefly to yell at Hogan, "And do you have to do that at the table?!"

"Yes I do I don't have much time before work, if you don't like it then shove off," Hogan insisted testily and Roman threw his arms up in the air in exasperation as he stalked back to his room, "No one cares about you, or Not-Molly."

"Hogan," Latimer snapped unthinkingly in a warning tone, the Healer… well he wasn't exactly always the most friendly and you had to pull him back when he started crossing lines like that, he did tend to back off when you told him to but you still needed to do that.

"What? He's useless and Molly was better than her," Hogan insisted defensively and straightened up, focusing on Bertie again, "Now Bertie, I want you to follow my finger."

"Geez, Log- Hogan," Ron complained of him, earning a sharp glare from the Healer meanwhile Heather turned on her heel, heading back outside the way she'd came.

"I'm not Logan, my brother is dead. And how can you possibly get us mixed up? We look nothing alike."

"Heather, wait!" Latimer pleaded but she continued on and he went after her.

"You're identical twins!" Ron's voice protested behind him in exasperation.

"So? That doesn't mean we look exactly the same," Hogan's voice said testily, "Very good, Bertie."

"What?! That's what identical means!"

"Heather!" Latimer called again as he made it outside, seeing her slumping down against the wall and he limped over to her. She spared him a brief glance before going back to staring ahead with an unhappy expression and he puzzled over what to say, "M- Mind if I sit?"

"I wouldn't stop you, Tobias," Heather shrugged and he sat down beside her, almost feeling goosebumps at being called by his first name. She didn't know he was generally called by his last name and he hadn't corrected her, he liked being called by his first name.

"You shouldn't pay what Hogan says any mind," he offered comfortingly, "He's mean to everyone, he was just as hard on Molly when she was here and now he defends her. He's just weird like that."

"But he's right," Heather said sadly, "I'm not Molly, she should be here instead of me."

"No, she shouldn't."

"I thought you were friends?" Heather wondered, puzzlement replacing her sorrow for a second.

"We were- are," Tobias corrected himself, not wanting to think the worst, "But… Look, Molly was a Seer and this is going to sound insane but… well, I think she knew."

"She knew?" Heather repeated dubiously, "Tobias, trust me. If she could see what they'd do to her, she'd have stayed away."

"Maybe she didn't all the details but I swear she knew something was going to happen to her. She's been acting kind of odd lately and she was sleeping less and less the closer we came to the mission, spending all her time trying to do as much as she can. She had nightmares about captured and tortured before, about betraying us and told me not to let Scorpius know if she was because Hogwarts will fall," he explained and she looked a bit more interested, "I think she knew, she knew but she went anyway."

"Why?"

"Why else? She must've thought you and Ron were worth being saved," Latimer offered seriously and comfortingly, Heather looked away thoughtfully, "You've already been really helpful, you're really talented and I'm sure your family will be really relieved to see you. You know Abby is aware of us, when she gets back for Easter we could probably arrange-"

"No," Heather shook her head firmly, "I'm not ready to see my family yet."

"Why not?"

"If you'd done the things I had… well you wouldn't be so keen to see your family either," Heather explained solemnly, "I know the kind of thing Molly's going through because I have been the torturer in that situation, I've done such horrible things. Terrible things."

"Did… Did you ever kill anyone?" he pressed gently, partly out of curiosity and partly because he got the impression she needed to get some of this stuff off her chest.

"Yes. The very first thing they had me do was to kill the family of my Specter's prior host, he was an Auror who had tried to break free. That way you learn what happens if you try to do the same or don't do what they say," Heather answered quietly, her voice steady but he could see her ringed eyes tearing up and he felt rather ill that the Shadows would do that, "I'm not a good person anymore, Tobias. How can I face my family after the things I've done?"

"They'll understand it's not your fault, you didn't have a choice," he told her seriously and she looked at him for a long moment, she had really pretty eyes. Deep like the ocean, "It's an impossible situation to be in."

"Hmm," Heather mused as she looked away again, staring off ahead for another long moment and he was trying to think of something to say when she spoke again, "Do you know I have a son?"

"N- No," Latimer admitted in shock, Abby had never mentioned that. Heather didn't look at him.

"The Soul Eaters have this breeding program, the plan is to have as many magical children to be born as possible in the hopes the next generation will be all magical when the muggles die off with age. For taking part you get benefits especially for the muggles, better treatment for slaves, being allowed to see your family and stuff like that. They don't even have to raise the child, they're just taken away and put in nurseries until they're old enough for schooling which is two by their standards. I was so sick of serving them I thought maybe if I asked to take part I'd have a break from the awful things I had to do.

"So I did, got paired with a high ranked Soul Eater who is one of the worst people I know but… beggars can't be choosers, right?" Heather recounted and heaved a sigh, still staring off, "I got pregnant, I did get a few months with… less and finally I gave birth to a little boy. For some reason in all my logical plan, it never had occurred to me that I was having a child, that I was going to be someone's mother. They're just numbers to the Soul Eaters, statistics for their growing population plans for a magical utopia piece of shit. But he wasn't, he was a perfectly healthy baby boy.

"And when he was born, I got to hold in my arms. He didn't cry, he didn't scream, he just looked up at me with his innocent little eyes. For the first time in a long time I didn't feel like I had ice inside my veins from the Specter. I just felt love for my son," Heather continued and swallowed before going on, he was kind of glad as it gave his brain time to absorb this new information, "Then the father was there, wanted to see his son. And he smiled and he told me to take out my wand and cut him - cut our newborn infant son - across the eye, I hesitated. He cut the baby across the eye himself then and he told me if I didn't then the next cut would be his throat.

"So I did. I cut my newborn son across his innocent little eye just like he had," Heather told him and paused again, tears welling in her eyes again but she still didn't look at him, "He was crying then and bleeding, not even an hour old. But he was still in my arms, still looking up at me. I didn't have a choice, I had to do because I have no doubt he'd have been killed otherwise, his father is not one to make idle threats. But he was a baby, he didn't understand that, he didn't understand anything. He just knew he hurt, he was in pain and I had been the one to do it.

"Bad is bad, pain is pain no matter what reason or justification you have," Heather stated, finally sparing turning to meet his eyes and it occurred to him maybe Roman not Hogan's words had been what had upset her. She looked away again, "Good reasons doesn't change that I did bad, Molly deserves freedom more than I do."

"What happened to your son?" Latimer asked after Heather had settled back into silence again and he saw a tear roll down her cheek.

"He took him away from me after that, I never saw my son again. I don't know if he's even still alive, I was told not to ask or to speak of him," Heather admitted quietly, wiping away her tear, "He'd be two now."

"Maybe we'll be able to find him," Latimer offered, trying to be comforting but not quite sure how to be.

"Maybe," Heather merely shrugged and looked back at him thoughtfully, "You actually believe you can win this war, don't you?"

"Well yeah. Don't you?"

"No," Heather said bluntly.

"No?" Latimer repeated in confusion, feeling quite baffled, "But you've been so helpful..?"

"I owe you guys for saving me. Besides, just because I don't think you can win it doesn't mean I'm going to stop fighting them, I don't want them to win. I just think it's inevitable they will."

"Why?" Latimer wondered, feeling rather disheartened.

"They control eleven countries right now, that's not hundreds of people or thousands of people or even hundreds of thousands of people. There are millions in their grasp, they have a trained fighting force of wizards, they have an army of werewolves, they have an army of Specters, they even put the dead to use as an army of Inferi. Not to mention the countless slaves, the Specter-possessed dragons, the assorted other magical beings in their grasp and oh yeah, how their leader is an extremely powerful witch who apparently can come back from the dead," Heather explained with certainty, "Gray only has about thirty-five and half of those are children, mostly still stuck at Hogwarts and not all the adults can do much. I don't doubt your dedication or Varanian's skill and granted he has done a good job so far but… come on, by sheer numbers alone you're doomed. There's just… too much."

"There's more to it then math, people have beat odds before. Heck, we have beaten the odds before."

"Be optimistic all you want, Tobias, really," Heather offered, holding out her hands as if to emphasize she was genuine, "But I've seen it from the other side, I've seen the last resistance of these countries fall over and over. This isn't a fairy tale, all the love and good wishes in the world don't make a damn bit of difference. People get hurt, people get killed and the good guys always lose in the end."

"Maybe or maybe you're just thinking like a Shadow still," Latimer said and her head snapped back to him in shock, "You said it's just numbers to them. But it's not, we're people and they're just people too, people who can get hurt and killed too. It's not the end, Heather."

"Well, I wish I could believe that," Heather told him with a sad smile as she got to her feet, offering him a hand up that he took. She had such soft hands, "Thank you, for everything. You're sweet, I'd forgotten that people could be like that."

"Well um… it was nothing," Tobias said, scratching at the back of his head nervously as Heather headed back inside. He sighed heavily, vowing to try cheer Heather up because no one should live feeling defeated. He knew that was a bad way to live, "I hope you know what you're doing, Molly. And even if you don't, you can bet your ass we're going to find you."

Pip Varanian returned disheartened after a failed spy mission, or not so much failed as just they hadn't discussed anything really relevant. They were just waiting for Scorpius to leave at Easter and attack, which was useless as they had already countered by telling Scorpius to not to and had nothing to do with Molly. If they even knew of her capture, it hadn't been mentioned. He was quite determined to save her, she was one of his people so he felt responsible for her. Besides, she was Scorpius' girlfriend and he felt bad enough lying without actually making strides in finding her.

Otherwise it had been successful, they had saved Ron Weasley and Heather Longbottom who were both useful. Heather knew a load from being forced to serve them for so long and Ron knew more things about the Aurors, about Harry Potter and Celestine Rooke. Both were willing to fight as well, Ron was unfortunately not in good shape to but Heather was extremely talented and he did appreciate Ron's willingness anyway and let him practice dueling at least. He had always put a lot of stock in training his people, if you were fighting the Shadows you needed to be able to defend yourself. Which made him despair for Flan, whatever part of his mind responsible for magic just seemed broken. All he could really do was cause explosions and despite their best efforts still had virtually no control even over that. He hadn't had control of his episode either on the mission, it had left him unconscious for days and Varanian knew that was not healthy.

He sighed as he headed down to his room, Annie was laying on her side on the edge of their bed with a foul smelling bucket on the ground her head. He worried about her, Ethel had never been that ill while pregnant. Hogan thought the baby was a metamorphmagus, it was more likely if it ran in the family and them shifting in the womb could make carrying them difficult like causing extreme nausea apparently and you could hardly stop the baby doing that so it was tricky to treat apparently. It was rather unfortunate, he could only hope it'd get better later on. Both for the sake of his future his wife and child as well as how they were down yet another fighter, at least soon when Scorpius graduated he'd have him and hopefully some of the Hogwarts lot. The Death Eater also wanted to help when he got his prosthetic leg, Varanian wasn't that much more trusting of him then he was of Jack/One but it was something. He felt like they were almost at the point of needing – and wanting - to be more on the offense so fighters were good, just needed to get Molly back and get damn PAW out of the way already if Prosper would just talk.

"No luck?" Annie queried as he reached her, her voice a little hoarse.

"No," he admitted guiltily as he lay down on his side beside her and hugged her gently from behind, she nestled into his arms, "How are you feeling?"

"In a word? Bad."

"Do you want me to get you a glass of water?"

"No, it'd just join its brothers in the bucket," Annie muttered and he rubbed her stomach soothingly, he still couldn't believe he was going to be a dad again. He had thought it was impossible but now he found himself terrified, exhilarated, anxious and hopeful all in one confusing mess of emotions, "Our son hates me."

"She does not hate y- Wait, how do you know it's going to be a boy?" Varanian changed his sentence part-way through in confusion.

"I don't, I'm just guessing," Annie admitted, shrugging slightly, "Why'd you think it's going to be a girl?"

"I had a daughter first then two sons, I feel like I'm due another girl. Why do you think it's going to be a boy?"

"Everyone in my family is a boy, Mum kicked the bucket when I was very young so I just had Dad, I had my brother and later I had a nephew. It's all boys so I'm better with boys and I want it to be a boy, sue me. Why? Do you want a girl?"

"Maybe. Kind of. Yeah. It'd be nice to have a girl!" Varanian protested defensively and Annie laughed weakly.

"I guess we'll see who wins."

"Yeah," Varanian agreed, trying to think positively of holding their child for the first time. She'd probably be born here, somehow he doubted the war would end within seven months, "Have you thought of any names yet?"

"Nah, you can pick the name," Annie told him sleepily like she'd been drifting off, much to his horror.

"I'm terrible with names!"

"All the more reason to let you name it something to be sure you'll remember it."

"I wouldn't forget my own child's name," Varanian insisted defensively, "And I'm still terrible at naming things, its better you pick something."

"Well I don't know what the hell to call it. You choose, I trust you."

"I named our resistance Gray, this is not my strong suit."

"How about Grayson then?" Annie suggested and he blinked, not quite sure if she was joking or not, "You know since he's probably gonna be born here, he's a child of Gray."

"We can't name him that!"

"Well give some suggestions then!"

"Okay… Ethel," Varanian offered and he felt her tense slightly, "What? It's not weird."

"No, it's not weird at all to want to name your daughter after your wife," Annie in a more sarcastic tone she was reminiscent of and despite having her back to him she seemed to sense him opening his mouth to defend his suggestion, "I know you want to honor her and your first family but come on. Why don't we just name him Philip Varanian III and be done with it?"

"That's a terrible idea, that's worse than Grayson. We got to let our kid have their own identity."

"Ah, it's kind of cute and fitting with weird wizard traditions."

"By that logic, how about we call her Annie junior instead then?" Varanian suggested and he outright her gasp.

"No! That's awful."

"You see my point then."

"Fine," Annie conceded with a sigh, "Next suggestion and try a boy's name this time."

"Okay, how about…" Varanian said slowly and drew a blank, he wasn't good with names. At all. He looked around the room for inspiration but saw only walls from his current position, "W- Wall… y. Wally."

"You just said that because there's a wall in front of you, didn't you?"

"I did not," Varanian lied, feeling his cheeks going scarlet at how quickly she'd noticed that and was sure if he could see her face she'd be raising an eyebrow at him, "I'm not good at names! I told you. Your turn and try a girl."

"Okay, how about…" Annie mused and he noticed her head shifting slightly as if she was looking around, "H- Hedwig. That's a girl's name, right?"

"You just read that as the author's name on one of the books stacked somewhere over there, didn't you?"

"I did not," Annie lied, her tone one of mock indignation, "I'm not good at this either, okay! You're the experienced one."

"Well Ethel did most of the naming," Varanian admitted in embarrassment.

"Oh. Well at least we have plenty of time to think of a name, its seven months until birth and then at least a year or two before he starts asking his name. Maybe we should just wait until then and let him pick."

"We can't do that!" Varanian protested, "Naming your child is parenting 101, we've got to nail that. Maybe Scorpius would like to pick a name."

"Probably not," Annie said, her tone quieter and more serious, "He probably won't want much of anything until we find Molly."

"Yeah," Varanian sighed heavily and wrapped his arms tighter around her, his guilt returning. He knew what it was like to lose someone you loved, he didn't want Scorpius to have to go through that. Or for Molly to have to die, or the base to fall. They needed to find her, for all of their sakes. It was easier said than done though.

Part 2: Loss in Life

Lucy Weasley stood over her sister, albeit polyjuiced into another of the Soul Eaters so Molly wouldn't recognize her. She barely recognized Molly. She'd been stripped down into her underwear and a sleeveless top, her skin stained all over by deep patches of multicolored bruises and blood both dry and fresh from the layers of cuts and welts. There were rough patches of burns, some of her limbs were twisted brokenly, her nails had been ripped out and one of her toes had been forcefully removed. Her once fiery red curls were mattered with dirt and blood, just a tangled mess hanging over her face, her face so filthy you could see the clearer tracks left by tears down her cheeks. Not so perfect now, was she?

Molly was shackled to the wall by her wrists and screaming, Lucy was using the Cruciatus Curse on her and feeding off the pain her former sister was in. She liked using the Cruciatus Curse, both as it produced a nice dose of pain to feed off and proved her ability to finally use the magic denied to her at birth. Not that Molly could know who she was, yet but when Molly did find out she could look back and marvel at the power her squib sister possessed while the pureblood Seer witch was helpless. Molly was pathetic, she couldn't wait to rub that in and feed off the emotional anguish she expected it cause.

And yet… Lucy couldn't help but have this strange niggling feeling in the back of her mind, it happened sometimes but in this instance it was to do with Molly. It was like something was missing, like an empty picture frame except instead of an image she thought it should be a feeling. She thought she should be feeling something for Molly, that was her own sister in pain after all and despite the resentment she once had she didn't think she'd ever truly hated Molly or wished this much pain upon her.

But whatever that feeling was, she couldn't feel it now. There was just an itch where it had once been. She didn't feel much of anything these days, she knew she should and once had but didn't now. She'd heard it rumored the other merged soul before her had struggled with identity but she had not, when she woke up after the merging she just wasn't the same anymore. All she really cared about now was feeding off pain, serving the Soul Eaters and using magic were also things that mattered to her but that was more in the way of remnants of her prior self and the loyal nature a Specter had.

She was staring down at her sister's brutalized body inflicting more pain on her but a niggling in the back of her mind like she should be feeling something was the closest she had to any emotion over the whole thing. She thought must show how far she'd fallen or rather how far she'd come, she was now a kind of immortal magical being with true power and abilities beyond the common wizard. Wasn't that better than a worthless squib who belonged nowhere? She thought so. Well, apart from another niggling sensation in the back of her mind that may say different but whatever it had wanted to say was clearly gone now. She dropped the spell.

"Are you ready to tell us where the Gray base is?" Lucy asked in the gruff voice of the body she was polyjuiced into.

Molly said nothing but shook her head vigorously into the wall, her eyes squeezed shut and her body still shaking violently. She was still in pain, not as much but Lucy still fed off it. Lucy crouched by her sister and grabbed her face roughly, forcing Molly to look at her with those sky blue eyes shadowed now by tiredness from the sleep denied to her. Lucy looked into her sister's eyes, thinking of the times they'd played together as children, talked and laughed in those days long gone. She tried to feel whatever was in the back of her mind, she tried to feel the feeling, tried to feel something. But she didn't.

"So be it," Lucy spat.

She smashed her sister's face into the wall without remorse, hearing Molly scream and feeding off the pain it elicited as she stood and returned to her position to continue the torture. Oh well, she thought as she turned her wand back on her sister, she had tried to understand anyway.

"Would you please just let me heal you?" Michael pleaded with him the next day. Scorpius had filled the others in what Varanian had told him in the Room That Doesn't Exist yesterday, Albus or Maurice must've told the others about Michael's situation and what he'd done as none of them had much sympathy for Michael right now and kept giving Scorpius annoying pitying looks.

"No," Scorpius insisted determinedly, he was still mad at him. He didn't want to be healed.

"I've said I was sorry."

"For which thing?" Rose queried, "You screwed up on several different levels."

"All of them!" Michael protested desperately, looking terribly guilty as he ran his hand through his hand through his hair, "Although for this particular instance I'm talking more about fighting Scorpius. I'm not proud of myself right now."

"I should hope not."

"Does this mean you change your mind about abandoning Easton?" Albus asked testily which just made Michael look frustrated.

"It's not 'abandoning' anyone, Dawn said it was okay and stop calling it Easton! It's not a boy, it's a bundle of cells that may or may not become a boy and Easton is a direction not a name."

"Rose and Lily are flowers and names."

"So is Ivy. Crystal is also a gem, Scorpius is a constellation and Sol is the sun," Scorpius added to Michael's flawed logic in disliking the name, "It's not even how you spell Eastern and is pronounced a bit different."

"It's not?" Michael wondered in surprise and sighed, "Well now I need to correct some things on my Herbology project, sometimes I miss Mirra."

"Geez, Michael, keep it in your robes," Rose complained at him with a look of intense disproval, "You already impregnated one woman this year, maybe a hag too."

"I didn't mean it like that! I was talking about her tutoring me," Michael insisted defensively, his face going red, "Her help is the only reason I passed my OWLs."

"You know, speaking of pregnancy," Scorpius spoke up, turning to Michael as he recalled he hadn't told him about Annie and he probably should know even if Scorpius was mad at him, "Guess who else is pregnant?"

"Fuck. All this denial about dating John and-"

"It's not Crystal!" Scorpius cut him off, getting the feeling Michael really did have a weird issue here, "Annie's the one who's pregnant, you're going to have a cousin."

"Aw, congratulations!" Albus offered happily, smiling widely, "This is awesome, Lydia will have another friend. It's beneficial for children to socialize with their same age peers, I read that. In a book."

"You read a book?" Abby questioned.

"I can read."

"Well good for them," Michael offered, not looking as ecstatic as Albus but was happier then he wasn't cursing his aunt before was looking at Scorpius worriedly again, "Scorpius, are you sure you don't want to be healed? It won't take a second, I'm really, really sorry."

"I'm sure!" Scorpius insisted and Michael looked hurt.

"It'll make you feel better."

"It'll make you feel better," Albus countered bitterly and Michael looked even worse, averting his eyes before scowling as he noticed Wyatt on the table taking beans off his plate awkwardly with his lizard mouth and eating them.

"Dammit, Wyatt, stop eating my food," Michael complained and grabbed the lizard, "You have to stay out of sight."

"You have to let him eat, he can't protect you if he starves to death."

"I don't even want him to protect me, it's a waste of time."

"Hey Sebastian," Antonius said and Scorpius glanced to see the werewolf joining them looking rather worried, "What's wrong?"

"Haven't you guys heard?" Sebastian asked of them and they could only exchange blank looks, "The US fell to the Shadows, it was just announced over the Wireless that they fell."

"Oh. Yeah. That."

"Yeah we heard," Albus confirmed, "Shocking."

"Does this mean you forgive me for following you?" Antonius asked worriedly.

"Yes," Sebastian nodded as he started putting food onto his plate, divided up as usual, "Just don't do it again, okay? Lauren's nice, you saw that."

Antonius didn't look like he was convinced but didn't seem to want to press the issue, Sebastian seemed more concerned about the States falling anyway but they'd already had this discussion yesterday. Scorpius was glad when the bell went for lessons, he was also glad to get away from Michael. He didn't really feel like talking to him right now and thankfully with Wyatt, he didn't even need to worry about staying with him to make sure he wasn't attacked. Although seeing as they'd already killed that poor girl, he didn't know if they would be satisfied until next full moon. Despite trying to avoid him, Michael kept trying to talk to him. It was mostly to apologize or offer to heal him but Scorpius really didn't care, he'd rather take his thumping eye and strange looks.

He had other things to worry about, today he had Alchemy so would have a chance to confirm his Jack the Ripper book was authentic then he could hopefully learn what he needed to about soul. He could also ask him about Leebin's episode as well. Apart from that, he needed to get the team onto the pitch as they had their match against Hufflepuff that weekend. For now though, he needed to speak to Rojer so he stayed behind after class as he often did to help clean up.

"So while I was in Hogsmeade on Saturday I got my hands on Savas' journal," Scorpius told him after the others had gone, "I was wondering if you could look at it to confirm its genuine?"

"I suppose," Rojer agreed reluctantly, scowling as Scorpius took out the journal and handed it off to him. Rojer started flicking through it immediately, he didn't look up but spoke, "By the ways, I have believe that the Healer in the school will have heal things like the bruises."

"I'm fine," Scorpius brushed it off, not wanting to be healed or talk about. In true Rojer fashion he didn't press the issue, just shrugged disinterestedly like he didn't care either way as he continued skimming, "By the way a… friend of mine had this… episode with magic that I wondered if I could get your opinion on."

"Well then talk with your words," Rojer complained when Scorpius paused to see if Rojer was willing, the alchemist didn't stop looking through the book as Scorpius told him about Leebin's outburst, "Well this is obvious, your friend just had use of the magic in his soul. Extreme magical outbursts can tap into the soul, usually when there is damage in the mind as there should be is mental walls in place to stop you otherwise taking so much and such raw of power as it can be dangerous and fatal as you have know."

"I know," Scorpius confirmed as Rojer closed the book, handing it back to him.

"This is the genuine, you have the right copy. Good luck with the reading of this."

Molly Weasley hung limply in her cell, her wrists chained above her. She didn't think there were as many people here as there had been with Flan so they couldn't torture her around the clock, she had moments like this she was left alone. Not that it was comfortable, the shackles were high enough she couldn't sit but not high enough that she was standing or hanging so instead her legs were in an awkwardly uncomfortable in-between where her legs couldn't be fully straight or fully bent. She didn't know how long it had been, there wasn't even windows in the red brick walls and since she was denied sleep most always it could be anywhere between hours or years that it had been there. All time just rolled together in a big long eternity.

Her eyes stung, her throat was parched, her empty stomach twisted up craving food and her skin crawled from the cold dancing across most of her body. She'd been healed mostly before they left her to make sure she didn't accidentally die while they were away, yet despite that, everything hurt. They left the bruises, minor cuts and scrapes, her nailbeds also still stung from where they'd been ripped out, there was an ache where a toe had been and her wrists were pained from the shackles biting into them. It hurt and this was nothing compared to the actual torture.

Varanian had been having Austin teach them wandless magic, she'd been very good at it but she still felt compelled to try. If she could escape on her own, her problems were solved and the pain would stop. She tried to focus but her worn mind was having no such luck, having your hands bound above you did not do well with trying to channel magic through them. She tired, she really tried but ultimately only succeeded in rattling her chains before slumping weakly and breathless. She was weak, it made her think it had been days if not weeks at least. She squeezed her eyes shut, trying to block out her feelings of hopelessness, pain and dread for one of her torturers inevitable return. She just wanted to crawl back into her mind, escape the pain her body was in.

"Giving up so soon?" a voice queried and she looked up, forcing her eyes open to see adult Oathan standing there with his arms folded, "Didn't you always tell me to never give up?"

"I've never even met you," Molly croaked, her voice coming out hoarsely.

"And you might never, you won't if you die in here," Oathan shrugged dismissively as he looked around.

"That sounds nice," Molly muttered weakly, half-heartedly, "Can you help me?"

"Sure," Oathan agreed before snapping his fingers, "Oh wait, I can't because I don't exist."

"Oh yeah."

"You can help yourself though, if you don't give up and focus. You might even make it past the guards, escape the anti-apparation bounds and get away."

"Really?" Molly wondered, grabbing onto the tendrils of hope.

"Yes. But it's very unlikely, about as likely as someone other than me being the one to end the war. I wouldn't recommend trying, odds are it'll go terribly."

"If there's any chance I have to try."

"No you don't," Oathan told her seriously and calmly, "Sometimes it's better to cut your losses, make the most out of the worst instead. Just because it may not be the future you want, it doesn't mean you can't make the best of it. The sun will always rise, no matter how dark the times."

"It doesn't matter if it rises if everyone is too dead to see it," Molly insisted, "You wouldn't have said about Scorpius and Brutus if it wasn't possible."

"Sometimes you have to let go, if Scorpius had done that he wouldn't have died."

"What? Scorpius dies?" Molly wondered shakily, feeling quite horrified.

"He's already dying," Oathan scoffed as if it were obvious, "What do you think he's been hiding from you? He's on borrowed time, he has been for months."

"Why?" Molly asked distraught and Oathan shrugged.

"How should I know? I've never even met you," Oathan told her, holding out his arms.

Molly blinked and he was gone.

Regardless she felt spurred on, she didn't want Scorpius to die. Why was he even dying? Why wouldn't he tell her he was dying? Had he told anyone? It distracted her from her pain too and she knew there was a chance, if she could escape they could win the war in this decade. She focused, concentrating desperately and opened her palm as much as possible while willing the shackles to open. There was a click and she dropped to the ground, painfully. She groaned and rubbed her chafed wrists but she was down, she felt her heart skip a beat.

Molly pushed herself to her feet, her legs trembling and threatening to give way. She took a step and had to grab onto the wall for support as the world spun around her, she did not feel good. She walked towards the exit shakily, hugging the wall for support but she thought it was getting easier with each step as the muscles in her legs got used to walking again. She went over to the door and tugged at it, finding it locked. She probably should have expected that.

She focused again, finding it easier now she had use of her hands and with great effort willing the door to unlock. She heard it click and collapsed against it, breathing heavily as dark specs threatened to drown her vision. She gave herself a minute, waiting for the feeling to pass and hoping they didn't return before that. They didn't and she managed to pull herself up again, fumbling to open the door and creep out into the empty corridor beyond. She had to move slowly but at least it gave her a chance to make sure her movements were quiet, she continued hugging the wall and listening in fear for the sounds of Shadows. They may not be guarding her cell – otherwise they'd probably just be torturing her – but they probably did have guards for the building or area as a whole.

She had no idea where she was going or how to get out, the stumbled along blindly, spotting a window at the end of the corridor and starting to head towards it before she heard footsteps. She changed direction, turning down a side corridor hurriedly and trying to go into the nearest door, it was also locked. She felt herself starting to panic as the footsteps got closer, she rushed to the opposite door but that was also locked. She could hear the footsteps getting even closer. She hurried on to the next doo down and… it opened! She hurried inside and closed it behind her, resisting the urge to slam it in desperation but be quiet with it.

She looked around and saw it was a bedroom, there was a neatly made double bed and some furniture but it was empty of any smaller items or personalization. She got the impression it wasn't being used, it was empty as well and was a dead end. She could still hear the footsteps, she swallowed and considered hiding under the bed but it was high enough off the ground she thought it might be easy to see. The closet? At least it wasn't immediately visible. She tried to head towards it but fell, her weakened body failing to keep up. She heard the footsteps stop.

Her heart pounded in her head, she heard it beating furiously and bouncing off the insides of her ear drums. She had no choice but to crawl under the bed, barely making it in time before the door opened and she jolted in terror but thankfully was smart enough not to scream. She went still, afraid to so much as breathe as a pair of boots walked into her sliver of view from under the bed. The boots walked forwards and stopped, probably looking around. She tensed as they started walking again, moving over to where the closet had been. She heard the sound of a door opening and thought maybe it hadn't been a good thing she hadn't hidden in there. She heard the door close and the footsteps walked back into view this time facing the exit, they paused again before starting to move as if to exit. She finally allowed her shaking body to breathe, only to scream as a hand grabbed her ankle.

"Did you really think you could escape?" a familiar voice sneered, "There are alarm charms on the doors. Stupid bitch."

Molly was yanked, dragged back out from under the bed and one of the boots stomped down on her face. Her skull rang and she made out the scarred – by her own hand – face of her father's killer, Maverick Selwyn, who was also one of her torturers. He looked at her with a look of loathing she very much reciprocated before he started kicking at her while she was down and Molly lamely tried to shield her face from his brutal boots. He took hold of her arm after a few minutes of kicking at her already battered body and pulled her to her feet, smashing a fist into her face that sent her sprawling onto the bed. She flinched in fear as he withdrew his wand but his anger seemed to fade, he looked as if something else had occurred to him.

"You'll pay for that," Selwyn said as he pocketed his wand and instead ran his hand roughly along her bare thigh, she froze in fear as his hands reached the line of her underwear.

She tried to push his hand away but he hit her again with his free hand and pulled off her underwear with the other, she tried to crawl away but he clambered on top of her and ran his hands over both of her legs with his nails digging in painfully. She tried to push him off, determined to fight even if it was futile as he could've been a mountain for all the difference it would make. He pushed one hand away and grabbed the other, snapping her wrist and smashed his fist into her face again as she screamed, her head rang and she felt rather then saw him pull off her sleeveless top leaving her completely naked.

"Don't," Molly pleaded desperately as he started groping at her body, she didn't need to be a Seer to know what he was going to do to her, "Please don't."

"I'll tell you what, if you tell me where your Gray buddies are then I won't drag you back into your cell and whip the skin off your back for daring to try to escape," Selwyn told her as he unbuttoned his fly, "But I am going to take your virginity and you will look at me the whole time so you can know this is for my face that you ruined."

"You murdered my father," Molly pointed out in a whisper, a strange image flashing in front of her eyes of Acutaing his face until it was completely smashed in. Then she just kept going.

"I don't care, I liked my face," Selwyn spat and she felt him grab her hair, forcing her head to look at his smirking face, "Not the pretty sister now, are you?"

"I won't kill you, if you don't do this I won't kill you."

"I'm not afraid of you, bitch," Selwyn laughed as he forced her legs apart and Molly resisted the urge to cry, not wanting to give him the satisfaction, "And I'm going to enjoy every second."

Molly spat in his face and he hit her again before thrusting himself roughly inside her.

Scorpius' initial enthusiasm at having found the material he was looking for was quickly dampened by actually reading it, Savas was a sick guy. The very first page started off describing his delight that his mother was sick and dying, she was in dire need of his support. Instead of doing that, he opted to experiment by performing an autopsy on her while she was still alive to see if he could find the soul. He also made his infant child – Enoch - watch as a father-son activity, his wife – he didn't say her name – was busy being 'punished.' Savas showed no remorse, he seemed to have a particular hatred for his mother and delighted in her suffering while also seeing genuinely fascinated by his experiment. He hadn't had the stomach to see how it ended, he would have to of course but he was definitely going to have to brace himself and was a lot less happy about it. He saw why it was dark stuff.

He instead opted to focus on preparing his team for the upcoming Quidditch match, he had less time to do that then read the psychopaths notes. Albus seemed more focused on studying then Quidditch but would when Scorpius asked, giving him a pitying look each time. Michael was more willing, he seemed to jump at the chance to do anything Scorpius asked. Probably in his guilt as he continued to apologize and plead for healing, Scorpius continued to reject both and the others were at odds with Michael still too. Everyone was really, losing so many points did not make him popular in the house and word got out why which made him less popular, he was often taunted and insulted. Maurice was the only one who'd really tell them not to and Scorpius wasn't sure that wasn't just him taking his Head Boy role seriously. His friends were all being nice to Scorpius himself though, they seemed to ask him if he was okay a lot which made him kind of annoyed after a while. He didn't want them to treat him any differently just because Michael had been a dick to him.

"Hey Martha," Scorpius greeted the younger girl in surprise as she approached he and his friends in the Library the day before the match, oddly her eyes were shadowed heavily by tiredness and her expression was one of guilt.

"Hey," Martha said in response, looking torn up, "How you doing?"

"Fine," Scorpius insisted, his black eye wasn't hurting so bad after a week anyway and she bit her lip looking positively tormented. Did she feel bad about the US falling, "How are y-"

"Orous, I don't think I can play in the match tomorrow," Martha spoke up, turning to Orous who looked shocked, "That's what I came over here to say."

"You can't quit the day before the match!" Orous protested, "Martha, come on. We've talked about this."

"Martha, don't feel bad about playing against me," Scorpius offered encouragingly, thinking from the look on her face her insane crush was probably the reason and she averted her eyes ashamedly. He really wished she'd get over that, "Really, I'd rather have a nice fun match with the opposition trying their hardest."

"You've been through a lot lately," Martha mumbled, "And my side has done so much bad, it doesn't seem right."

"I'm fine, really," Scorpius insisted in frustration that this had spread to Martha too, "And I don't blame you for anything the Shadows are doing. Just relax and we'll have a fun game."

"Depends how hard Orous has been training," Michael pointed out under his breath.

"If that's what you want," Martha sighed and Orous looked relieved.

"Hey Martha, have I showed you a picture of my niece yet?" Albus asked of her eagerly, changing the subject. He liked showing off pictures of Lydia.

"I don't think you've even spoken to me once in my entire life so probably not."

"Why don't I do that then? I need a book from my room anyway, I want to make sure this essay is accurate too get a good NEWT."

"Since when did you care about that?" Abby questioned of him as Albus stood to leave with Martha, Scorpius was only surprised he didn't have one on him already as he usually did.

"Since I have a niece I want to provide for, there's more to raising kids then cooing over how cute and perfect in every way Lydia is. Also might need to provide for Easton now if Michael remembers he has a soul and wants help."

"I'd help him," Scorpius offered, "My family's rich and I got a key to the vault with unlimited access when I came of age."

"Well aren't you lucky," Rose commented as Albus left with a slightly more confused looking Martha while Michael buried his scarlet face in his hand.

"Dawn said it's okay if I don't get involved," Michael insisted, not for the first time, "She'll be fine, she has her own place and a job, probably has lots of money saved up since she chose to keep it, she's doing great I'm sure."

"Is she? Or do you just want that to be true so you feel better about abandoning your child?" Maurice countered and Michael sunk lower into the table.

"I still can't believe Martha was about to not play against me," Scorpius spoke up, wanting to change the subject because he was kind of fed up with it, "Crushes are weird, huh?"

"Oh yeah, so weird," Antonius agreed immediately, "You know, from what I've seen of other people with them."

"No girls you like?" Abby asked curiously.

"Nope, none," Antonius answered with absolute confidence before looking thoughtfully, "But you know, Scor, if you did have a crush on someone but you didn't want to have a crush on them then how would you stop having a crush on them?"

"What makes you think I know that?!" Scorpius spluttered out in shock at the question, Antonius looked abashed.

"I- I don't know. I just thought since you want Martha to stop, you might know. You know, it'd be good to know to help Cassia get over Al or Sebastian to get over our Transfiguration professor."

"Well I don't know, they'll probably just grow out of them."

"How long does that take?"

"Probably until they do something so horrible and stupid and disgusting and you wonder why the hell you could ever like someone like that," Rose offered with a shrug and Michael looked kind of concerned by this, Antonius looked worried.

"What if they don't do something like that?"

"Well Albus got over his weird adult women crushes when he realize they were hopeless I guess so enough time without the person being interested and you get over it at some point, eventually."

"Just don't worry about it," Orous told Antonius encouragingly, "These things will work themselves out, you're not the one with the crush so just let it play out for them."

"Helpful advice," Antonius sighed heavily.

Part 3: Reminiscing

The day of the match came and as usual Michael was literally sick with nerves but seemed strangely somewhat more optimistic than usual, all of his friends were being especially encouraging for some reason. He didn't know why it struck Scorpius as odd, it wasn't like there was any reason they wouldn't be and maybe it was because it was their last year they just seemed more into but… he just couldn't put his finger on it. At any rate they headed to the locker rooms to get ready, Martha wishing him luck and seeming in somewhat better spirits then yesterday.

"Alright team!" Scorpius spoke up, this time he'd come prepared with a speech and put a great deal of effort into sounding enthusiastic, "This is our second match of the season, we're up against Hufflepuff. I know they seem tough but Orous is probably going easier on them then he did last match or they'd quit so it won't be so bad, plus I reckon they won't have as easy a time crushing us. You know because we've been training, you're all doing well. So let's get out there, try get as many goals in as possible and win this match!"

"Yeah! Go Gryffindor!" Kemen Arkaitz the beat cheered enthusiastically and fist pumped the air, Colin Creevey whooped, Albus, Michael and Rufus Rhett applauded while Montague looked a bit confused by his teammate's reaction. Scorpius was on Montague's side, he thought his speech would sound more impressive than that and last longer since it had taken him ages to write.

"If you guys are that easily impressed, try hold it together whenever we score a goal," Montague grumbled at them, folding his arms stubbornly.

"What's got your knickers in a twist?"

"It was a good speech!" Albus agreed adamantly, not sounding entirely truthful and Michael nodded.

"I had family in America," Montague shrugged uncomfortably.

"Well take your mind off it by focusing on the match, eh?" Rufus offered, clapping him on the back encouragingly while Michael walked over to Scorpius fidgeting nervously.

"Are you sure you don't want me to heal you?" Michael asked of him which just had Scorpius scowl irritably, he didn't want to be healed, "Since when did healing become a bad thing? You'll see better with your eye fixed for the match."

"I don't want to be healed, if I lose so be it," Scorpius insisted and brushed him off, turning back to the rest of the team as they needed to get ready to walk onto the pitch while Michael hung his head unhappily, "So let's line up, team, leave our issues on the ground, go out there and do our loved ones proud!"

They picked up their brooms and moved into place, just as he heard Hufflepuff being called and a minute later so were they. He walked across the pitch with his team and shook hands with Orous, the albino giving him a strangely sympathetic expression. The weird pitiful looks he was getting alone made him consider healing just to make them stop, he couldn't think of any other reason for the weird behavior even though a black eye was hardly the end of the world and it didn't even hurt as much now after a week. Really it was the fact Michael had willingly attacked him and said… what he said that hurt more than the injury itself ever had.

He tried to take his own advice and shake his mind of it, he did have a match to focus on. He wanted to do Molly proud. He mounted his broom along with the rest, the Quaffle was released and the match began with Michael diving down to swoop it up. He sped in for an early goal but Martha was no slouch, she threw herself into the way and managed to brush it off – barely – with her fingers and land impressively back onto her broom as if she'd been practicing all her life. Unfortunately for her though, in the time it had taken to land Albus had caught it and sent it back through a further off hoop to secure the first goal of the match. The game was on.

Scorpius was quite nervous about the match actually, he had to hold off catching the Snitch to wait for their goals to get up which always made him on edge as it went against his instincts as a Seeker to get it as soon as possible before the opponent. Instead he just had to rely on his Beaters to keep Orous off the Snitch and his Chasers to score as much as possible in the meantime. And they seemed to be doing just that, Michael was on fire and Albus was also going all out. Not that Hufflepuff was slacking although Orous seemed to have eased up on them somewhat, he thought some of the players had changed too but he didn't pay enough attention to be really sure they were different people rather than just having had a haircut on the last Hogsmeade trip or something. Martha and the Chasers seemed to be doing particularly well, especially compared to the Beaters but his Chasers were still better and they spent most of the time trying to keep hold of the Quaffle rather than actually getting to put it to much use and Gryffindor maintained a steady lead which would be higher if Martha wasn't so competent. Although maybe he was imagining it but she did seem a little less focused then her last match.

And then there was Orous, Hufflepuff were still doing so well in terms of points from their last match that he didn't have to wait for many goals to be scored like Scorpius did so he did go after the Snitch. Scorpius tried to look for it purely to know where it was when he needed it and to know where to keep Orous away from, he had to try not look like he was looking though in case Orous saw. He did still, the Beaters just had to pummel Bludgers his way until Orous lost sight of it in order to avoid getting hit which worked well the first two times but the third time they'd been more focused helping keep Bludgers off the Chasers, Colin didn't spot it at all and Kemen barely did in time to send a Bludger spiraling impressively and struck Orous' outstretched hand from hallway across the pitch. Scorpius really couldn't afford to wait forever, Orous wasn't exactly a bad player or a bad Captain if he'd told his players to make sure his Beaters stayed distracted by the rest of the match. When they hit a hundred and a fifty – which they were close to – Scorpius decided he'd aim to catch it and try to be more proactive in stopping Orous getting the Snitch.

He saw a glimmer of gold not long after that and dove towards the ground in a separate part of the pitch in a feint, thankfully Orous fell for it and also pulled into a dive. He pulled up at the last second to avoid hitting the ground, Orous managed to do the same though but it didn't matter as they were halfway across the pitch now and the Snitch was long gone. Orous gave him a slight scowl as he realized he'd been tricked but didn't say anything, Scorpius noticed he was holding his wrist in a position awkwardly though where Kemen's Bludger had caught it and wondered if it was injured but Orous flew back up before he could ask. Scorpius also returned to the sky, itching to end the match now more than ever so Orous could get healed if he was injured. Thankfully, they hit the mark not long after that and he could start looking to catch the Snitch proper. Now he wanted it of course, it suddenly decided to make itself scarce. He did finally catch sight of it again but so did Orous, they both shot towards it like their brooms had been lit on fire, Scorpius urging his broom to go faster outdated model be damned and he did have a height advantage over Orous so longer arm span. He reached out, Orous doing the same rather awkwardly making it easy for Scorpius to swipe the Snitch from the air before the Hufflepuff.

"And Malfoy catches the Snitch!" the voice of commentator cried as he came to a halt, he still had no idea who the girl commentating was, "Securing Gryffindor a win of 320 to 100."

It turned out Orous had injured his wrist from Kemen's Bludger, it soured Scorpius on the whole victory. It was hardly against the rules but… Scorpius would've rather won entirely on his merit, he'd never know if he'd actually have lost if Orous was all full strength which just made him feel disappointed despite his friends – including Orous' – encouragement. Naturally the rest of the Gryffindors didn't seem to care and they threw a victory party regardless, for the kind of 'honorable' house he stubbornly felt like they should care more. Andreas had managed to sneak in to the party somehow and taken over it completely, he'd snuck in some food and drink from the kitchen thanks to his alleged friendship with the house-elves, music was magically blaring all around and he was singing half the lyrics – and was surprisingly good - but he must have used some insanely good Silencing Charms as none of the staff were complaining. Scorpius didn't know if Gryffindor was unaware he was a Ravenclaw or if they were simply having too much fun to care.

It did seem to be taking people's minds off the war and the atmosphere was cheerful at least, Scorpius hadn't realized how tense things had been in the castle until it wasn't anymore. Rose had abandoned her books for the dancefloor, she harshly rejected Maurice's offer to dance but danced with one of his roommates, Angelo Jordan, a guy he didn't recognize, a guy he didn't know the name of before settling on Montague who she was having a drink with. Albus danced with Abby after she made clear it was just as friends, Maurice had headed back up to his room, Lily had gone off to find Orous, Lysander was snogging a girl – a different one to the ones Scorpius had seen him with before – while Michael was hovering around Scorpius. He kept chastising Wyatt on his shoulder for nodding his head along with the music which was also what Sebastian was doing except he was just sitting off to the side not on Michael's shoulder, Antonius had persuaded to dance by Andreas it seemed when the Ravenclaw wasn't singing and looked like he was having fun for once. He supposed they were too young to think about dating and dancing with girls yet.

Scorpius just felt kind of sad though, aside from disappointment with his win the music reminded him painfully of Calderon and the victory party itself made him miss the old team. Freddie and Caitlin, Louis on the reserve, Latimer and of course their fearless Captain Molly. He wished they were there, Freddie and Caitlin seemed – and he hoped – were happy together with their growing family but Latimer and Molly could use the break from the war then of course Louis should still be alive, he'd been so full of life. But James had killed him, just like he'd killed Vern who also had deserved his life but obviously wouldn't be in the Gryffindor's victory party.

He retreated up to his dormitory and pulled out the book Latimer had made for him, the little paintings of his friends. Latimer really was a talented artist. He flicked through the pages sadly, reminiscing of back before. When they had the good old team, when Vern and Corin were still alive, when Molly and Latimer were still in school, when Calderon still danced the halls, when Michael was still short. And kindhearted not a horny alcoholic who'd beat his friend and abandon his own child, when Scorpius could actually trust his best friend. He still always wore the childish friendship bracelet Michael had gotten him, the Thestral ring from Calderon and of course the Portkey ring from Varanian but that was more practical while the other two things were purely sentimental. Things hadn't been perfect in the past, there'd still been the war and always something going wrong but somehow it seemed better. Not like now when they were disconnected and split up, some of them gone forever.

"You okay?" Michael asked of him with concern and Scorpius tore his eyes away from the photographs filling his bedside table that they'd been starting to drift towards.

"Fine," Scorpius lied, blinking away the misty feeling in his eyes as he closed the book. The past was gone. He replaced it and rolled onto his side away from Michael, "Just tired."

"You know I'm sorry, right?"

"I know," Scorpius confirmed without moving, after a minute he heard Michael sigh sadly and leave.

After that it was back to the grind for the rest of March, after that it would be the Easter break which Scorpius would still be stuck in the school for but he did have a promise to keep to Molly as the threat of the Shadows still loomed. Not only loomed, they'd already launched an attack on Canada and Russia shocked the world by announcing its intent to ally with the Shadows rather than face the devastation the other countries were dealing with. And they weren't even the only ones, the rest just weren't as big as Russia. They were mostly poorer countries or those close to conquered lands or those who had struggling to deal with the fallout and riots from the reveal of magic, countries had talked about it before but now Russia had taken the step it was serious. Other countries pleaded with Russia to not to but after a final announcement from the Russian Minister for Magic he was set on his decision and was expecting to speak to the Shadow Master in person tomorrow they went silent, the country closed its borders and seemingly became sealed with the same magic cutting off the other countries under the Shadows control. And more announced they too were joining too after that.

"The US was one of the most powerful countries in the world," Maurice said solemnly at dinner after reading the article about Russia being cut off, "Them falling is hardly inspiring confidence in the rest of the world, particular those smaller and weaker than the US. Added to that the economy is being screwed by these things being cut off, especially for muggles and we're actually doing good compared to the rest of the world. Alaric has spent a lot of time dealing with the reveal and muggle relations, countries that didn't follow his example and continued to deny or keep quiet are struggling with an angry, unruly populace. And it's only going to get worse, Aaron was right. This is only going to keep snowballing, the more power the Shadow Master gains the faster she'll crush this world."

"Who's Aaron? My brother's name was Aaron," Sebastian spoke up and Scorpius jumped, having forgotten they had the young werewolf sitting with them now, "And my daddy's name was Aaron, I don't remember either of them saying that. In fact, Daddy always said good would win in the end like it always does and that I shouldn't worry about it."

"That's what all parents tell their children," Rose pointed out in a sweet albeit slightly patronizing tone like she was trying to say it nicely, "They'd say anything just to make sure they don't worry, it doesn't make it true."

"I believe it is," Sebastian said optimistically, taking a rare moment to actually look Rose in the eye with a smile, "We just need to stay strong and have faith."

"In… divine intervention?" Michael guessed disapprovingly.

"No, in humanity," Sebastian corrected and Maurice burst out laughing, the werewolf frowned and some of the others also looked amused or shook their heads at him, "What's so funny?"

"You're so naïve," Maurice criticized and Sebastian looked even more confused.

"But think about it, all through history Dark Lords have risen up but they all failed in the end because good people always rise up against them even when all hope seems lost. Everyone has dark and light inside their souls, as a whole the light always shines the brightest and vanishes the shadows. If it didn't the world would already be bad and bad things wouldn't be bad, they'd be good and there'd be no laws. Does that make sense?"

"It makes sense you'll grow up someday," Albus offered.

"Hope, dreams, faith and love don't do jackshit in real life," Michael agreed making Sebastian just scowl further.

"Well you won't get anywhere by giving up, that's not what Gray would do and we should do like them because they're probably going to be the ones to save us," Sebastian offered and this time it wasn't just Maurice who laughed although Scorpius didn't.

Scorpius was on his side this time, he had faith in Varanian even if he didn't in Sebastian's childish fairy tale logic although he thought they were laughing at the irony of Sebastian's words rather than against their own group. It was strange to think of the kid looking up to them to win, they were hardly the elite fighting force destined to win the way it was for resistance groups in stories like the Order of the Phoenix or the DA. They weren't heroes like them who knew what they were doing, they were just doing the best they could. It was harder in reality then stories made it sound to poor Sebastian.

"On the bright side," Maurice spoke up again, "This should buy Canada some time if their focus is on converting Russia and the other countries as well since it's before they have the process streamlined especially."

Maurice did seem to be right about that and maybe Varanian warning beforehand had helped as well, it was hard to tell as the Shadows didn't allow much information out but the fact they weren't quickly announced to have fallen meant they were probably still holding their own. For now. Oddly on the subject of Canada, Varanian ringed him to ask if he was right in thinking Orous had been on vacation to Canada which the albino confirmed. He thought of why he'd want to know that before needing to ask, if Orous had been there it was a way back into the country if he was willing which Scorpius had no doubt he would be. Orous had become as focused on the war as his brother had once been, pouring over books on fighting techniques, torture and Dark Magic in the Library they focused more on schoolwork. Meanwhile, apart from keeping an eye on the news Maurice was very much into his NEWT work.

March continued to pass him by and Scorpius found himself spending an increasing amount of time alone, for a combination of reasons. He no longer had to be around Michael constantly to ensure his protection now he had Wyatt, he also had to read Savas' journal and because more independent NEWT projects they were busy with their own things. Sometimes he thought he spent more time with Thestrals as an animagus then he did people as a human as Thestral behavior was his Care of Magical Creatures project, of course he didn't tell Professor Hagrid how he was getting close to them. They had mostly been accepting of him despite his humanity, they even encouraged him to find a mate and didn't seem to understand when he said he had one who wasn't there. They were more simple minded then he'd thought actually, eating and courtship was rather important to them and they didn't always seem to grasp outside concepts the way a person would.

"Well of course they are," Cassia complained when he mentioned this to his friends in Defense Against the Dark Arts one of the days during their Patronus lesson.

"Erm… how do you know?" Scorpius wondered in confusion, she rolled his eyes.

"I can talk to birds, you don't think I get what they're like now? Animals have a different way of thinking to people, a simpler way in their own world. That's why it's so easy to convince them to do things when you speak their language, they're impressionable."

"Wow, Cassia, sometimes you're really smart," Albus commented and the little girl blushed.

"Of course I am, my Daddy is only the greatest teacher ever," Cassia told him proudly, trying not to smile, "He's even teaching me magic."

"You'd make a good Magizooligist," Rose offered and Cassia threw her a stubborn frown.

"Well I'm not going to be, that's a stupid job. I'm going to be like my Daddy, I'm signing up to be an Auror soon as I turn seventeen and after that I'll eventually become Head Auror Cassia Ashain."

"Overconfident, much?"

"Rose, I have Daddy's entire Defense Against the Arts curriculum memorized by now, I'm the youngest Occlumens in the history of the world thanks to Maurice's training and we're working on Legilimency now, I'm an Avisora, I'm fighting in a war and I'm not ten for another two months and four days, I've killed people before, I have experience fighting the Shadows for years already, I'm already magic and it's in my blood," Cassia recounted, not like she was bragging but just like they were facts, "So long as I don't die first and stay determined I got this. Plus Daddy says I can do anything I set my mind and that I'm advanced for my age, I'm basically a grown up already."

"You should enjoy your childhood while it lasts, Cassia," Abby said with a solemn look, "Don't be so quick to grow up, you can't go back."

"Why would I want to go back?" Cassia scoffed bitterly as the bell rang for the end of class, "Innocence isn't bliss, its fucking stupid. Knowledge is power, thinking and caring about dumb childish things will just get you hurt or killed."

"Ignorance," Maurice corrected.

"Same difference."

"Does anyone else feel kind of bad?" Albus wondered sadly as they filed out of the classroom, "Like we screwed up with her somehow?"

"Well that's what happens when you swear in front of children, Albus," Rose criticized, "I told you not to."

Part 4: Progress

Scorpius also found himself spending time alone in order to read Savas' journal, which was as disturbing as it was fascinating. Despite not finding the soul while dissecting his mother alive, he wasn't put off and instead theorized – correctly – that the soul might just not be visible to mortal eyes or – incorrectly – women didn't have souls. Savas didn't seem to like women, like he never referred to his wife or mother by name which he claimed was because they didn't deserve them and discussed feeling they were inferior as they were inherently cruel and twisted. His experiments shifted to figuring out how to see soul for a while, researching into ghosts, stories of the Resurrection and most importantly: Thestrals, due to their connection to death and how they could only be seen by one who had seen and could comprehend death. It was Savas who had discovered much of the information Rojer had told him before as well as ultimately inventing the Eye of the Thestral – and thinking back, Rojer had said then Jack the Ripper created it – the elixir before that allowed someone to see souls.

After that was when it started to get weird and Savas got more murdery. He was impotent and had thought sleeping with a prostitute not his evil trickster wife – Savas' words – might fix it, it hadn't and he'd attacked the woman in anger since obviously it was her fault – Savas' words again. He figured he might as well not waste her death so attempted to experiment by mutilating her as she died, this had started his infamous killing streak. He'd also butchered a neighbor and the entire family due to his son befriending one of the children, forcing his son to watch to discourage him from such 'trivial' activities. Suddenly, Scorpius wasn't surprised Varanian's grandfather had seemed such a coldhearted bastard in the memories. And on top of that, Savas was a metamorphmagus. Still when Aurors announced they were going to help the muggles, he did decide to take more precautions. He'd still kill people but he'd take them back to his house, make sure no one ever found the bodies. This also gave him more time with his victims which was better for his twisted experiments of torture and mutilation, this was also where the gibberish started.

From what I have observed with the Eye of the Thestral, I feel quite confident in saying all humans have a soul – even the women. Shocking, isn't it? Some may be more surprised to know muggles also have souls but they're basically like people just without magic so I expected it, it's even reflected in their soul (magic comes from the soul, it's plain to see with the Eye) but I wouldn't have thought it of women or at least they'd have a different kind of soul but alas it seems souls are genderless which makes sense I suppose as they're not bound by the physical plane. Or perhaps I am simply not seeing it yet.

Regardless, I feel looking deeper into the soul itself and manipulating it would be beneficial so I have been doing that on the subjects. I took the three o'clock train at two, the sunshine was purple tonight. It's cold in the summer when the dogs bark in the spirit of the night, it belongs in spades and the chairs are drawn. I don't understand the hearts of eyes, the eagles soaring under the sea and the grass growing along the surface of the moon. It is broken, the fire is cold but the lemons take flight. Can you see delight in the rotting stone in the trees of the stars? Every time I swim in the dirt, I hate the cheering elephants so skeletal and meek like a stampede. Time is wasting, the key in your head will make the sapphire bloom the broom in the dark. Clap their hands!

So anyway, I have also been looking in what causes the different colorization in souls…

It was completely random like that, there'd be paragraphs of nonsense amidst the otherwise coherent narrative. Savas made no note of this change or showed other signs of insanity that Scorpius could tell, at least not in that way. He was psychotic clearly but he was intelligent and aware of what was going on, he made sure he did as he was very controlling and would describe the experiments of mutilating his victims physically in excruciating detail but when it came to soul… that was when it seemed to be gibberish. He asked Rojer about it.

"I told you, this is how this is," Rojer pointed out, "Some of this is the nonsense, some of the people think this is his unstableity and others think this is code or spells to have hidden how to manipulate souls as he did not want others to have do this or not yet. It is not uncommon for people to do this to hide their work before they are ready to reveal it, but if this is the case for Savas no one has been have able to figure it out."

Scorpius was inclined to think the latter anyway, he thought it seemed more in line with the personality he gauged from the twisted writing. He was learning things though through Savas' observations and experiments, including attaching souls together much like Scorpius had done with Calderon's soul. Savas described observing the very things Rojer had warned him would happen, that was happening to him as he continued to see Calderon's memories in dreams. The souls essentially start to deteriorate, two couldn't exist indefinitely as separate entities within in the same body – with the exception of Horcruxes but that was a little different because the very nature of a Horcrux was that it be safely sustained outside of the host – so would start to merge.

The souls start to deteriorate, you can see them breaking up. It's rather pretty actually, all these little speckles as the souls start crumbling and mixing into one another. I wish I could take a photograph but as I've said, it doesn't work. Besides, the souls may be beautiful but the subject isn't, suffering pain and fever. The host starts to experience the memories of the parasite (and I suspect vice versa but there's not really a true way to communicate with the parasite) and thoughts as the minds start to merge, there's a brief period of harmony but the deterioration continues and the subject slips further into insanity as their souls deteriorate into further sprinkles, their minds too as they hallucinate and have trouble knowing what's real before they forget who they even were. And then there's nothing left and the body dies, burned up inside and no longer able to function.

It's a rather fast process but with the next two I'm going to attempt to put a magical seal in between the souls, I don't believe souls are supposed to be in such close proximity to each other lest they burn each other up so with some kind of seal to keep them more separated I believe it may preserve or prolong their lives. And if not… well, I get to see more pretty sprinkles. I'll try finding two subjects with different soul colors this time, I believe the effect would be even nicer and it would be interesting to see if it changes anything. I should also try mixing wizardkind with muggle soul, maybe man with woman as well to see if a difference becomes more noticeable.

Savas did do more experiments after that and did find out he could seal it to prolong it, if the host was a muggle they died faster than if the host was magical as muggle bodies couldn't physical handle as much as wizards. He did actually a bit about how to rip out people's souls, or at least said it was easier and required less effort then splitting the soul since naturally the soul was whole and left anyway upon death. You just needed to grab it before it could move on, which was easier with the ability to see the soul you were trying to touch using the Eye of the Thestral potion. He claimed there was no spell and it was more focus and manipulating it as Rojer had said before, Scorpius needed to know how to put souls back not take them. If Savas ever got to that.

Aside from all that and Quidditch practices which took more effort when you were planning them, there was one more thing that occupied his time: Apparation. This was his last year and he really felt like he needed to get it down, it was an important skill for a wizard to have and he was still struggling with it after having already done a full course, this one was almost done too. Maurice had nailed it pretty quickly, Orous had taken a bit longer but was also successful now. Scorpius was still failing, no matter how hard he tried even now Maurice was trying to give him advice since he was already good at apparating until finally two weeks before Easter.

Crack!

Except it was wrong. Scorpius felt an agonizing sensation tear through half of his body but was unable to even scream in pain as the other half of his body felt like it was being compressed, the world flashed dark and then he was on the ground on his stomach. One side of his hips, one shoulder, half his face, one ear and his side in general was in agony, he could feel blood gushing out of him and couldn't feel the arm or leg on that side. He could only scream, vaguely aware of cries of horror from the others in the class before he passed out.

When he came to he was no longer in pain or on the ground and he could feel all his limbs again, he was lying on his back on a bed and he felt impossibly weak like the strength had been sucked from him. Flicking his eyes around he saw he was lying in the Hospital Wing, Head Healer Marigold was coming back over to him with a potion that he helped him to drink. It looked oddly familiar.

"What happened?" Scorpius asked weakly.

"You splinched yourself," Marigold informed him bluntly, "Very badly, one of the worst I've ever seen. It was pretty gruesome actually but I put you back together, it's not difficult if you get there in time. The issue is blood loss, you lost a lot so you'll be on bed rest and Blood-Replenishing potion for a couple of days until you get your strength back."

"But… But I did it though?" Scorpius wondered hopefully, Marigold looked at him like he was quite mad and Scorpius supposed it probably did sound it considering he probably could've died but Marigold clearly didn't know how long he'd been trying to apparate and that this was the closest he'd ever got, "Apparating I mean?"

"Well you only apparated half of yourself and you reappeared in the exact same spot you'd been standing in before but if you want to count that as a win then sure," Marigold told him testily, scowling disapprovingly, "Which reminds me, you'll have to miss your apparation class next week. Don't want to risk this happening again when you're still fragile."

"But-"

"No buts!" Marigold insisted and stalked off, leaving Scorpius unsure whether to feel glum or not that he was being denied classes just when he was making progress.

His friends were definitely on Marigold's side though, especially Michael who agreed on a healing perspective. They – with the exception of the young Ashains - could already apparate though, it was easy for them so of course they weren't going to understand how important this was to him. He was feeling better after the next day even and was sure he'd feel perfectly normal by Sunday, he didn't see why he shouldn't be allowed. It was bad enough he wouldn't be able to risk going to Hogsmeade without being denied apparation class as well.

Which did remind him that he needed to talk to Maurice, since he couldn't go to Hogsmeade he wouldn't be able to speak to Ephraim Lamb and get him to point out the kid who was almost certainly one of the other killers so someone else would have to do it. And that someone was obviously Maurice. The full moon was that week and came with another threat written in blood on the walls: You know the drill by now, dogs return they die.

"Maurice, can I talk you for a minute?" Scorpius asked of the deaf boy after a Defense Against the Dark Arts class on Thursday while everyone else started filing out for lunch, Maurice had really started going easy on people in that class.

"Okay," Maurice agreed, looking at him expectantly.

"I meant in private," Scorpius corrected, it wasn't a secret from the others but he didn't want to talk about it in public still.

Maurice shrugged and they headed out, Scorpius telling the others they'd catch up as Maurice led him into a nearby unused classroom and put up some protective enchantments to stop intruders or eavesdroppers before taking his translator necklace.

"Okay, I need a favor," Scorpius offered and Maurice's shoulders slumped slightly but he didn't think it mattered, "Since I can't risk going to Hogsmeade, I need you to speak to Ephraim Lamb – the homeless werewolf you met last time – and find out the identity of the other attacker that I've talked about before. He can identify him, hopefully the guy will be there so you just need to walk around with him looking at students until he sees the right one. Got it?"

"Why me?" Maurice questioned unhappily and Scorpius blinked in confusion, he'd have thought it was obvious, "Why not one of the others?"

"Because you're reliable and the others have lives."

"And I don't?!" Maurice demanded somewhat angrily much to Scorpius' surprise, "Why is it always me?! Why do you always expect me to drop everything in my life to do something for you?! And never once are you - or any of them – willing to drop everything to help me?! Why does everyone always expect me to be responsible for everything?! And if that's not bad enough, you all criticize me for being like a soldier because it's not normal but if I try to be normal I get criticized for not being like a soldier because that's what everyone wants or expects from me?! WHAT DO YOU WANT FROM ME?! IT'S NOT FAIR, SCORPIUS!"

"What- I- Where is this coming from?" Scorpius wondered in shock, Maurice looked at him incredulously.

"From life! Who had to teach everyone Occlumency? Me! Who had to pretend to be you in detention? Me! Who had to work hard to keep Martha from killing you and the Scamanders? Me! Who has to make sure the werewolf prefects are never alone at rounds? Me! Who had to translate your rune book? Me! Who has to Imperise drunk Michael back to the castle? Me! Me! Me! ME! It's always me, I always have to do everything!"

"So you don't want to help?"

"I do want to help! I just…" Maurice insisted, tailing off as his voice cracked and tears leaked from his eyes. He backed up and sat down on the windowsill, wiping at his eyes and taking a shuddering breath as he averted his eyes, "Never mind, it doesn't matter. I'll talk to the stupid werewolf."

"It matters if it's bothering you," Scorpius offered but Maurice didn't respond, he was still staring off out the window. Sometimes he forgot Maurice was deaf, sometimes he forgot a lot of things about Maurice it seemed… He thought he knew what Maurice meant not, he walked over and sat down beside him which finally got Maurice's attention back.

"I just said I'd do it," Maurice reiterated, "Was I not speaking loud enough?"

"You were, I just wanted to talk to you more," Scorpius told him, not for the first time wishing he was better with words, "I'm sorry if it seems like I take you for granted, Maurice, I really do appreciate the things you do and I come to you for things because I trust you, you're usually the one who can do things. You're one of my closest friends and if you want help then you just need to ask for it, I hope you realize that."

"Really?"

"Really," Scorpius confirmed, "So what's bothering you?"

"A lot of things I guess but the most pressing is that I froze up when Hugo was attacked- I didn't do it on purpose," Maurice said quickly as if he thought Scorpius would have accused of him such a thing, "I thought of Corin dying because I killed Pyrrhus, it's like my mind just seized up and I couldn't, I just couldn't do anything. I did not do it on purpose, I don't know why it happened but I'm scared of it happening again, I don't want anyone to get hurt."

"Well…" Scorpius started to say and realizing he hadn't a clue what to say but Maurice was looking at him regardless, "Sometimes… we have to hurt the… bad people to stop… the good people getting hurt and just because of what happened with Corin… it doesn't mean it'll ever happen again. You may be a little dark but you're a good person at heart, you do the right thing even if it means doing a bad thing and that's… okay. Just… try to have faith in that, in yourself."

"You're not very good at giving advice, are you?"

"I tried," Scorpius sighed, flushing slightly in embarrassment but Maurice smiled a little at least.

"Well thanks… I'll try to remember that and I'll talk to your werewolf," Maurice assured him as he stood to leave, "I'll just have to cancel my date."

"You had a date?!"

The rest of the week passed quickly and Maurice found himself on the way to Hogsmeade, walking by himself partially due to having something to do solo and partially because he couldn't really communicate while walking anyway. It was a clear sky but a cold day despite the absence of rain or snow, the weather was improving but wasn't there yet. He did see some of his friends though, Albus and Abby were walking together to see Lydia and Abby was meeting up with Sequoia after, Rose was on a date with one of the Gryffindor Quidditch players and Lorcan was with his own twin, Hugo and August. Maurice felt a little sad seeing them, his heart did still twinge with guilt every time he saw Hugo – although the boy himself ironically forgave him immediately – and seeing twins getting along made him sad Orous was at odds with him still. The others weren't allowed to come, Antonius was too young, Scorpius couldn't risk it and Michael had lost his Hogsmeade privileges.

Maybe it was good he had had to cancel his date, he didn't think every girl would be okay with walking in silence or would bother to learn sign language to be able to speak to him in motion like Lenore had. He still missed her, death in general had been weighing heavily on his mind lately but it had seemed stupid to think of saying that to Scorpius, especially when Scorpius himself might very well know what it was like to lose a girlfriend soon. He felt bad for Scorpius for that but he didn't feel bad for lying to him like some of the others, Scorpius would only be sad and in pain if he found out so he was fine with prolonging the time until that or if they got lucky Molly would be saved before then. He did hope so, Molly was his cousin through her non-Weasley side after all and he did respect and care about her. Realistically though, the Shadows would not be taking chances with a Gray member so sadly it probably wouldn't be easy to get her back.

He reached the small wizarding town and started looking around for Scorpius' vagabond, he spotted Orous snogging Lily outside a café and sighed as he kept walking. He thought he'd rather be on his date then doing this even if it wasn't Lenore, this was more important though potentially. Maurice wasn't sure he had as much faith in a drunken vagrant as Scorpius did, maybe Michael had soured him on the reliability of alcoholics. He was pretty angry at Michael in honesty, his actions were despicable of late and he was pretty low on sympathy. Considering his mother had practically abandoned him and later Orous, his father had practically abandoned Orous and later Maurice himself… he couldn't agree with Michael abandoning his child at all, it really did make him angry. He also didn't approve of his drinking, he didn't approve of his promiscuity and he found attacking Scorpius abhorrent.

He was distracted from his disproval of Michael by spotting the werewolf he was looking for, lying down in a filthy alleyway. Maurice hoped he wasn't dead, that wouldn't be ideal. Approaching, he noticed the guy was drawing breath however.

"WAKE UP!" Maurice yelled, hoping it was loud enough and the vagrant jolted awake, flinching fearfully and cowering like he expected Maurice to kick him.

D D Did you want something, the words appeared around the man's head as he gazed up at him with the one eye that wasn't swollen shut.

"Scorpius said you could identify an attacker in the school, he can't make it today so he asked me to ask you if you could do that."

Right, the werewolf nodded repeatedly, pulling himself into a sitting position, Does that have to be today

"Yes, we can only come during Hogsmeade trips," Maurice insisted, "If you're hungover just suck it up."

I'm not hungover, the werewolf insisted, looking almost hurt he thought that, it was the full moon a couple of nights ago and a pretty rough one, I'm not over it yet

"Fine. So are you going to help or not?"

Okay, the vagrant sighed but nodded, reluctantly getting to his feet and wobbling slightly on an ankle that looked injured. The one time Michael would be useful.

"Alright so if we just walk around the town and you look out for this guy, I'm deaf and I can't communicate while walking so if you see him then just tug on my sleeve and point him out to me, when I touch my necklace I can see you speak. After that you can just go back to… whatever you do every day, understood?"

Understood, the vagrant confirmed with another series of nods before Maurice started walking.

It was a tedious process, the vagrant hobble along slowly so they couldn't move very fast and Maurice had to keep checking to make sure he was still there. He looked ready to drop asleep at any second on top of that, Maurice had concerns he wasn't even paying attention and he kept making the same random motion with one of his hands over and over again. Maurice wondered how Scorpius had any faith in this guy, alcohol had probably rotted out his brain like it had Michael's. It wasn't a very pleasant experience to walk around aimlessly, eventually though the werewolf tugged on his sleeve and pointed out a burly boy. Maurice didn't know his name but he recognized him as one of Elm's friends, a boy in their year who had expressed prejudice against werewolves.

"Okay, thank you," Maurice offered to the werewolf.

The vagrant nodded a few times, looking relieved it was over as he shuffled on into the nearest alley and lay down. Maurice had decided already even when the kid was identified he'd spy on him for a while so faked interest in a shop window since the boy was walking towards him, he could follow after. The boy surprisingly paused by Scorpius' homeless friend, gave him a look of utter loathing and launched a vicious kick. His boot connected with the werewolf's face and there was an explosion of blood from his nose as his head was knocked back into the wall, the boy looked devoid of remorse as he glanced around while Lamb clutched at his nose. There were several people about besides Maurice, not a large crowd but he wasn't alone either. The boy scowled and spat on Lamb, kicking him hard in the fleshy part of his stomach before stalking off. Maybe this wasn't as hopeless a lead as Maurice had thought.

Part 5: Back to Base

"So just us, eh?" Michael commented to Scorpius after they saw the others off for Hogsmeade, sounding enthusiastic and giving him a desperate smile that Scorpius didn't return. He wasn't looking forward to being alone with Michael, thankfully he wouldn't be.

"Us and Antonius," Scorpius reminded him, gesturing to the First Year with them.

"Um…" Antonius said as he scratched nervously at the back of his head, "I erm… actually kind of had plans to spend the day with Andreas, Sebastian and them lot… y- you don't mind, do you? We're still friends?"

"Of course we're still friends, go and have fun," Scorpius offered encouragingly with a smile to hide his disappointment, he had wanted Antonius to have more friends in his own year for after they graduated but he also didn't feel like being alone with Michael. It was just his luck Antonius would pick now of all times to spend time with his new friends.

"Okay, thanks," Antonius told him with relief, giving them a wave as he headed off. Scorpius sighed.

"I guess it is just us," Scorpius confirmed, turning to head back inside and Michael made to follow before hearing Wyatt chirp on his shoulder and batted him off in annoyance.

"Dammit Wyatt," Michael complained as he hurried after, which only made Scorpius' scowl deepen. After all, Wyatt was giving up any kind of life for the sake of living as a lizard and having to stay hidden in order to protect Michael. He could stand to be a little more appreciative rather than complaining and batting at him whenever he saw him, it was probably worse for Wyatt who hadn't been keen on the idea anyway and Scorpius felt bad for the guy, "So what are you thinking of doing?"

"Homework, plan for Quidditch practices," Scorpius shrugged it off as they reached their dormitory once more, he hadn't really thought about it but he wasn't feeling particularly energetic, "Don't know."

"Want some help?" Michael offered desperately as Scorpius flopped down onto his bed.

"No," Scorpius shot him down without hesitation and Michael hung his head unhappily as he sighed.

"You know I'm sorry, right?"

"So you've said," Scorpius acknowledged, he was kind of fed up with Michael apologizing. Maybe he was just a jerk but Scorpius really didn't care, it didn't change anything or make him feel any better.

"Well, have you been listening?" Michael countered pleadingly which Scorpius thought was kind of unfair, "I'm sorry for what I did to you, like really truly sorry. I was completely out of line and I wish I could take it back."

"Well you can't take it back, okay?!" Scorpius snapped at him sitting back up and feeling rather exasperated but he really wasn't in the mood and he was kind of fed up with it, "And no amount of apologies is going to change that. You were my best friend, I trusted you and you just… just threw it back in my face. And in public, no less!"

"You're upset because I hit you in public?" Michael wondered in confusion and Scorpius only felt angrier, did he seriously not remember what he'd said?

"And you don't even remember what you said!"

"What I… Something about muggles?" Michael seemed to guess.

"Yes, Michael, something about muggles. The thing that I confided to you that's extremely difficult for me to talk about, or think about," Scorpius told him bitterly, trying to stop the sadness creeping into his voice, "You said the cruelest thing you could and then beat me like I was dirt… That's not okay."

"I know," Michael admitted quietly, "I'm sorry."

"You do know and you know to be better than that, you used to be better than that. You used to care about everyone but now you don't care about anything."

"That's not true," Michael protested defensively.

"Isn't it?" Scorpius countered, ready to point out what an asshole he was being lately and how he didn't seem to care, Scorpius wasn't even sure Michael cared about himself anymore. He thought that might be going too far though, at any rate Michael seemed kind of lost for words and Scorpius thought maybe it was best to go calm down alone somewhere, "I'm going to go bathe in the Prefect's Bathroom, I'll see you later."

Scorpius did just that and Michael didn't question it or say anything, he did have the right to use it as a Quidditch Captain and was given the password. He also didn't really have to worry about interruption – although he locked the door anyway, he was pretty paranoid about that – due to most everyone allowed being at Hogsmeade, it was kind of nice there and reminded him of the bathrooms at home. He could never quite relax though, he just felt too vulnerable whenever he wasn't fully dressed or a Thestral. Still he tried to let the warm water ebb away at his bad mood, he was still sore about being made to miss an apparation lesson tomorrow so dealing with Michael on top of that had grated on him he supposed. He didn't know what to do about him, at least Maurice should hopefully come through with an identity on the attacker. He could use some good news at-

"Scorpius?"

Scorpius jolted upright, splashing water every which was as he did so in order to look around the empty room. Usually he'd be extremely disturbed at someone calling his name when he was alone in a bathroom but he knew that voice, he wasn't sure what he'd expected to see but he was damn sure he'd heard it as clear as day.

"Calderon?" Scorpius asked of the silence, holding his breath and hoping for a reply from his cousin.

Silence.

Scorpius waited a few minutes, listening and cast the Human-presence-revealing Spell just to make sure he was indeed alone. He was alone though, Calderon calling his name had either been just his imagination or genuinely coming from his cousin's soul. It was silent now though, he waited as long as he felt comfortable but Calderon didn't say another word. If he ever had in the first place.

Scorpius finished bathing and went back to his regular life, trying to work on planning practices for Quidditch and to not think about it. He deliberately avoided going near areas Michael would usually be, preferring to be by himself for this. It was only later on when people started returning that he sought out his friends that he did the same, both because he needed to find out if Maurice had found anything and because he didn't mind facing Michael so much when there were probably others around. He headed back to Gryffindor Tower and was surprised to find Cassia in a game of Wizard's Chess with Michael in the Common Room there.

"Finally," Michael greeted him in exasperation, "That was a long bath."

"I worked on Quidditch planning too," Scorpius informed him, holding up the book as proof while approaching and saw surprisingly that Cassia was kicking Michael's ass, "Why? Did you need me?"

"Daddy wanted to talk to you," Cassia announced calmly, her attention on the match, "Queen to B5, you're in check again."

"Damn," Michael swore as her Queen sauntered over and toppled his last Bishop but Scorpius didn't really care about that.

"What does your dad want?" Scorpius questioned, finding that more pressing.

"I told you, he wanted to talk to you," Cassia reiterated as Michael scowled at the board, Scorpius rolled his eyes.

"I meant what does he want to talk to me about."

"Knight to D3," Michael said with a heavy sigh, he had pretty much lost.

"Queen to D3," Cassia commanded proudly and her Queen slaughtered his last Knight, "And that's checkmate, I win again. You're not very good at this game, are you Michael?"

"Cassia, what did he want to talk to me about?" Scorpius repeated slightly louder and more slowly to make sure she was hearing.

"I don't know, he didn't say."

"Well thank you," Scorpius offered, turning to leave to ask him but found himself instead practically pounced on by an excitable Albus who was grinning from ear to ear.

"Guys! You won't believe how big Lydia's gotten and I have pictures, she's so cute!" Albus blurted out happily, scrambling to pull out the images to show them, "Oh wait till I tell you! She's brilliant…"

And so Scorpius found his plans sidelined by Albus, he really didn't have the heart to tell him he had more pressing concerns then to hear about their dead friend's baby. He didn't want to dampen Albus' spirits – especially as there wasn't always a lot to be happy about these days - and it wasn't like he didn't care, it just wasn't the greatest time in the world. He was nonetheless pleased the first month of Lydia's life had been a pleasant one, it was good she and Olivia were doing well. The others returned while Albus was talking and they headed down to dinner before he was done talking about Lydia, it was in the Great Hall that Maurice tapped him on the shoulder and gestured to a Ravenclaw sitting with Elm.

"Rocky Russo," Maurice informed him, "He's the one your werewolf pointed out, he kicked your friend so I put him in detention the second he got back. I'm keeping an eye on him, he's the one to watch though if he is the right guy."

"Good job," Scorpius offered gratefully before recalling Maurice was deaf and not touching his necklace, he instead gave him a thumbs up as he wasn't sure how to sign that and made a mental note to thank him later as he didn't want or had ever meant to make Maurice feel taken for granted.

Scorpius had to leave finding out what Professor Ashain wanted until tomorrow, if it was that urgent the professor could've spoken to him during dinner. There was no announcement for another death either, things seemed alright. The next day first thing after breakfast he went to go see Professor Ashain instead, it wasn't like he had an apparation class to go to or anything even though he felt perfectly fine and he didn't see why he shouldn't.

"Professor?" Scorpius pressed as he knocked on the classroom door politely before pushing it open, seeing the man alone marking papers, "You wanted to see me?"

"Yes, I- I did," Professor Ashain confirmed, looking a little nervous now and quickly went over to him and closed the door behind him which he then sealed magically with the same enchantments Maurice had used yesterday before heaving a sigh, "I finally heard back from Brutus, he'll be in England over the Easter break and is willing to meet you then."

"He is?" Scorpius wondered in surprise, he'd kind of stopped holding out hope for that as it had been so long but it was a good thing as he did need to save Calderon. The professor nodded and he did feel a stab of worry, he wasn't supposed to leave Hogwarts. He'd promised Molly, "Is he meeting me in Hogwarts because I'm staying for Easter."

"You are?" Professor Ashain seemed equally surprised, "Brutus seemed to be expecting you to leave for the holidays."

"Well I'm not, it's just a week and a week I can use for NEWT study. I've already put my name down and told my parents and everything, I can't change it," Scorpius pointed out, it wasn't lying exactly but he didn't want to get into the whole imminent attack thing, "Just get him to meet me here."

"Are you insane?!" Professor Ashain demanded of him incredulously, "Brutus is a wanted criminal, he is literally the Shadow Master's second in command! He can't come here, the place crawling with Aurors who arrest wanted criminals not to mention those having secret meetings with them and those arranging said secret meetings. It's too risky."

"I'm sure we can manage it," Scorpius pleaded desperately.

"There are enchantments to detect people entering who aren't supposed to be here."

"There are ways around that though, right? Like it doesn't detect animagi."

"No, non-humans slip through the cracks because there's too much wildlife to do it for animals but Brutus isn't an animagus so it's irrelevant anyway," Professor Ashain brushed it off and sighed, "We'll have to sneak you out for a while."

"What?! No, we can't do that," Scorpius protested, his stomach twisting up with guilt and nerves.

"Do you want to have this meeting or not? You have to go home for Easter or sneak out, that's the only way this could possibly happen," Professor Ashain told him seriously, "It's okay if you don't want to-"

"No, I want to," Scorpius agreed quickly, sighing himself and thinking of Calderon's voice. He had to save his cousin and this could very well be his only chance, he didn't have time, "It's not like anyone would know if we sneak out, right?"

"I sure as hell hope not, we're all damned then. There's no shame in backing out."

"No, I'll do it," Scorpius confirmed, feeling his insides twist up anxiously, "I just hope I'm not making a terrible mistake."

"So do I, Scorpius," Professor Ashain sighed, "I hope whatever you need is worth it."

Scorpius at least thought the professor would approve if he could know without freaking out, he had been friends with Calderon after all. It didn't make him feel any less nervous and stressed about breaking his promise, still it was only bad if people knew he left. He wouldn't be gone long, he didn't need to speak to Brutus long. Although it didn't go unnoticed Brutus had thought he would be gone, that was the Shadows thinking he would be gone for their invasion. It made him doubt his whole plan in the first place, Brutus was still very much the enemy here.

The next few days were the last before the Easter break which he found quite stressful now he planned to sneak out to see Brutus, he also was worried about the killers striking again. Maurice had Rocky Russo spending all his free time in detention, he had apparently hit poor Lamb and Maurice was the Head Boy so he had the right to punish him for doing something wrong. At least for the last few days of term, he couldn't do it for the rest of the year. Scorpius didn't know if it was a sign of his guilt but there were no further attacks and Easter rolled on without incident, he bade his friends – with the obvious exception of Antonius – goodbye for the week. Hopefully the school would still be there when they were supposed to return.

Michael spent the train trip back alternating between sitting in the Prefect's Compartment and performing rounds on the train, Maurice had them pretty organized. He was glad as it gave him something to focus on, he was actually pretty nervous about leaving Hogwarts for Easter and kept gripping the coin counting his days of sobriety for support which he had in his pocket. It was a lot easier to get alcohol outside of Hogwarts then from within, he wasn't sure he trusted himself anymore and he was afraid of falling off the wagon again. He'd been very tempted to stay but he did really want to see his family, besides in just three months he'd be done with school so he had to face the world at some point.

The train finally pulled into the station and everyone started filing out to find their families, Michael no exception although he wasn't sure who even was picking him up. Abby was bidding him farewell pretty much the second he got off, leaving with her mother and younger brother August. Rose left with her own mother and younger brother soon after, Orous and Lily preemptively started kissing goodbye enthusiastically. Enthusiastic enough that Albus started clearing his throat increasingly loudly to try get their attention without outright interrupting, until he gave up on that.

"Hello! Lily! Orous! Can't you hear me?!" Albus complained at them instead in exasperation as they finally pulled apart, glaring disapprovingly.

"I heard, I was just ignoring you," Lily told her brother with a casual shrug.

"I didn't notice," Orous admitted in embarrassment, "Did you want something?"

"Yes! For you to stop snogging my sister!" Albus protested.

"Look, its Orous and Maurice!" a voice called before Lily could reply.

They turned instead to see Orous' muggle stepfather approaching with the child he was fostering, the one with burn scars on half his fac. Unlike a few months ago, the baby was walking now albeit unsteadily like he was still learning it and was clinging tightly to Cade's hand. Caradoc did have a smile on his face regardless though and gurgled unintelligibly at the comment, probably picking up on the excited tone rather than having an idea what he meant. Michael's heart did go out to the poor kid, he was glad Caradoc seemed happy and in good health. Still, as always with anything related to babies these days it caused an uncomfortable pit to form in his stomach as it made him think of East- the unborn fetus! He just did his best not to think about it as he bade farewell to Orous and Maurice.

"Cute kid, huh?" Albus commented to him as the twins left, Michael looked at him but said nothing as he suddenly got the impression he wasn't the only one to be reminded of something by Caradoc, "Really makes you think, huh?"

Michael shrugged, deciding it was the most neutral response he could give and tried to look around desperately for someone to pick either of them up.

"Do you really never think about Easton?"

"Albus!" Michael complained in exasperation, both at the use of the name and not wanting to talk about it.

"What? It's a valid question," Albus insisted defensively, "There's a woman out there carrying your child, how can you not think about that?"

"It's nothing to do with you, okay? So can you just leave it alone."

"You should go see Dawn while we're on break, see how she and the baby are doing," Albus continued to press despite the dagger look Michael attempted to throw at him, "What? You're right, it's nothing to do with me but it is everything to do with you. I know you don't feel like it's convenient for you to be a dad right now but you know what? It's not convenient for Easton either and he's the innocent one here. You need to do the right thing now, you're going to regret it if you don't because your son will be hurt otherwise and you know this, your whole Daddy issues stem from your own dad not being there for you growing up."

"Stop being so bloody righteous, Albus," Michael snapped irritably, "It's easy to sit there on your high horse saying to do the right thing but it's not so easy for us dogs on the ground who actually have to shovel that shit, if you were in my situation you'd feel the same. Dawn told me I have no obligation and you're right about Jack, I shouldn't be so hard on the guy."

"I may not be in your situation but Vern was and since he can't be here I'm doing everything I can to support Olivia and the baby, I don't have any obligation either but I am. And I'm glad because it's worth it, don't you think your son is worth it too?"

"It's ironic how you do all this stuff in Vern's name when for all you know if he'd lived to know for sure he'd knocked Olivia up, he could have chosen to walk away."

"Don't you dare! Don't you fucking dare say that about Vern!" Albus turned on him angrily now clearly upset, "He was such a kind and loving person, if you knew him at all you'd know there's no way he wouldn't want to be with them right now so don't you dare drag him down with you just because you're-"

"Hey Al, look there's Mum," Lily commented, gesturing into the crowd and picking up her drunk, "Let's go."

"Okay," Albus agreed through gritted teeth and went to go with her before looking back to him, lowering his voice, "And you know what the worst thing is? You're better than me, Michael, I have to work my ass off just to be mediocre but you… you actually have talent and Dyslexia or no, you're not as stupid as your stepdad made you feel you are. It'd be easier for you to get a good job and support Easton if you weren't choosing to be a selfish prick right now."

Michael didn't have a chance to say anything as Albus stalked off at that moment with his sister, he wasn't sure what he even wanted to say to that anyway. He hadn't meant to sound insulting to Vern either, it just was a fact that they'd never got to see his response. He sighed unhappily, wondering if he'd even have any friends left by the time he left Hogwarts. Easton would be better off without him anyway, he was doing the unborn fetus a favor.

"What's up with you?" a familiar voice asked and Michael's head shot back up to see John standing there and his mood soured further.

"Half my friends hate me," Michael grumbled, scowling at the former Death Eater trying to think what was odd before realizing it was that John was standing there unaided by crutches, "You got your magical prosthetic leg?"

"Yeah. Finally," John grunted, talkative as ever it seemed as he took his trunk, "Come on."

Michael didn't argue, the faster he was back at the base the sooner he didn't have to be around the former Death Eater. Hopefully his family was still awake, he did want to see them. They left the station in silence, heading out and disapparating once out of the crowd although it wasn't as necessary he supposed now that magic was common knowledge.

Wyatt stuck his head out again as soon as they reappeared in the fields around the base, Michael batted at him again and went to complain at him but he jumped into the air from his shoulder and was human again when his feet touched the ground. Michael had almost forgotten Wyatt didn't need to be a lizard, the man looked relieved although strangely had black bags beneath his eyes like he hadn't been getting much sleep and he was noticeably thinner to the point that his clothes looked a size too big now like he'd lost weight from not eating much. It was strange, didn't he go to the kitchens at night for food and then sleep? Michael assumed he did that, that's why it bugged him when Wyatt tried to take scraps off the table at meals as he might be seen.

"Ah, it feels good to be human again," Wyatt said with a relieved sigh, stretching himself out.

"I bet," John offered as they continued on towards the base and inside.

"Michael!" Ivy cried happily, running over to hug him as he walked into the kitchen.

Michael was surprised to see a birthday cake laid out on the table with Crystal, Agnes, Bertie, Latimer, Myriam, Maurene, Lysel, Aurelius, Dom – with baby Cres on her lap - and Austin gathered around. There was also a large banner reading 'Happy Birthday!' and it occurred to Michael that it must be Ivy's birthday, he'd thought it was tomorrow but he must've got the dates mixed up. He didn't know why twos and threes had to look so damn similar.

"Wow, I can't believe you remembered my birthday!" Wyatt exclaimed excitedly.

"Oh, we didn't… This is for Ivy," Dom pointed out awkwardly, "It's her birthday today too, she wanted to wait for Michael to blow out her candles. Sorry Wyatt."

"Oh, right," Wyatt said, looking embarrassed, "Well in that case, Happy Birthday Ivy! I'm gonna go sleep for a week, see you then."

"Bye Wyatt, we'll save you some cake!" Ivy called after him as Wyatt headed upstairs.

"Happy Birthday," Michael offered to his sister with a smile that she returned, giving her a cuddle and trying to sound enthusiastic, "Let's get those candles blown out then and you can tell me all about your birthday."

Part 6: Heart to Heart

It took Michael awhile to fall asleep that night, they had finally ran out of rooms – his one had been given to Rose's dad apparently - so he'd had to sleep in Molly's room which just made him feel weird. He did hope they could save her, he may not have as strong a connection with her as some of the others but she was still his friend and he wanted her to be okay. Apart from that, she had pictures on the bedside table. One of her family, one of the old team with the Quidditch Cup and one of Scorpius that must've been taken during his motor cycle lessons as he was sitting astride one holding the helmet like he'd either just taken it off or was just about to put it on, he was smiling with his white-blond hair caught up in the wind. It made Michael feel guilty, reminding him that Scorpius hated him now. And probably would hate him even more when he found out he was complicit in keeping this from him, the more time passed the more pissed Scorpius would probably be.

At least Ivy had had a good birthday, he was glad to see his siblings but there were a lot of other people living there. Varanian, Annie, Roman, Austin, Latimer, Crystal, John, Agnes, Ivy, Bertie, Heather, Ron, Dom, Aurelius and their baby Cres, that was fifteen without counting himself, Wyatt, Molly and the prisoner Prosper or the fact the Leebins stayed there during the full moon and Annie was pregnant with one more to come. Despite that, he still felt the absence of Flynn. Breakfast was chaotic but it was strangely organized chaos, there were bodies and people going in and out but it had a practiced rhythm to it like everyone knew where they supposed to be. Michael felt rather left out. He was also quite horrified that John took Agnes outside for training and everything seemed on board with this, his little baby sister was being taught magic when she was only eleven! And not even weak magic, they were working on full on offensive magic. It was far too dangerous for her, magic was too dangerous for her. She was just a kid, she was one of the 'little ones.' They shouldn't be teaching her magic.

"Don't you think its better she knows this stuff and never has to use it then doesn't know it when it could've been the only way to save her life?" Dom queried of him when he asked, "She's in good hands, don't worry."

"A Death Eater is good hands?" Michael scoffed disbelievingly.

"He's not the only one who teaches her, everyone keeps an eye on him anyway."

He didn't like it still but everyone seemed on board, none more so then Agnes herself. He'd have to talk to Crystal about it. His other siblings were doing better at least, Ivy had made a friend in Leebin's similarly aged daughter and Bertie had gotten a prosthetic eye. While it was better than just a gaping black void, it was still an electric shade of blue in contrast with his hazel and still looked a little disturbing as the prosthetic didn't come with an eyelid so that eye couldn't blink. They had to learn things too, since they couldn't go to regular muggle school right now they were being homeschooled with Aurelius. He didn't know if it was always Aurelius – he supposed the guy might have experience raising two sons as homeschooling seemed kind of standard for magical children – or he was just on kid duty today, he was watching his baby son too. The baby also painfully reminding him of Dawn, in a way he actually was tempted to see her in the hopes something had finally gone his way and she'd aborted, miscarried, been lying or realized she'd been mistaken in thinking she was ever pregnant which would put his mind at ease and get everyone off his back.

But he didn't. He did see Annie though, she was on strict bedrest right now but as her bed was in the basement he could see her. She seemed to be doing okay considering, she was on a potion regime to keep fluids up and get her nutrients since liquids were easier to keep down and she was weak still but doing better then she'd been. From a healing standpoint he'd consider her stable and making progress, she was just into her second trimester which was when morning sickness tended to stop so with any luck it should improve things. Mostly she was just kind of frustrated at not being able to do things and pretty bored when she was awake, he couldn't really blame her. He normally would have wanted to talk to her for advice but considering her poor health he really didn't feel like, she could do without the added stress. He wanted her to be okay and preferably his unborn cousin too, it was another reason to not be a dad as well as his child would be the same age as his cousin. It would be weird, it was weird enough that Varanian of all people was going to be his uncle when they married.

It was good to see Latimer though, he'd been worried how his friend would cope with Molly gone but he seemed to be doing okay all things considered. He also unexpectedly saw Orous that day as well, with his memories they thought they could get into Canada via Jack/One so Varanian had gone to see him then had to bring him back. The base was protected from the Trace so they could get him to extract a memory of the place, Orous didn't seem too pleased though and had wanted to go.

"Firstly, it's too risky both in general and because of your Trace. Secondly, as your soul is broken Jack/One wouldn't be able to see directly into your mind anyway," Varanian shut him down simply, Orous couldn't exactly argue with facts but still seemed displeased.

And then there was Jack/One, it had been deemed too risky for them to be allowed into the base. Michael couldn't decide whether he was glad or not, he both desperately wanted to see Jack and never wanted to Jack ever again simultaneously. Considering his first instinct had been to run when Dawn told him she was pregnant, how much he already loathed his unborn spawn and had no desire to raise it – which Dawn said was okay! – he thought maybe he'd been too harsh on Jack or would be a hypocrite to be now. Sure Jack had never been there for him but so what? Why should he be there for him? Jack had his own life, if he just didn't care enough to be there then that was his choice and he shouldn't hold it against him. It was sad to think Michael just didn't matter but you couldn't force someone to care, love couldn't be created. What he could hold against Jack though was merging his soul with a destructive, psychotic force of darkness. Now that was bad.

This left really only one person to see, Crystal. He found his mother in her room, sitting at a table against the window sewing up a tear in what looked to be one of Bertie's shirts judging by the size. There was a second chair diagonally right to her which he went to sit on, she glanced at him as he approached and gave him a tired but kind smile.

"You know with magic they could fix that instantaneously?" Michael commented, nodding at her sewing.

"I know," Crystal admitted, giving a slight shrug, "But I'm not magic, got to make do and try doing any minuscule part I can the best that I can do."

"Do you want some help?"

"No, I'm pretty much done anyway," Crystal pointed out, seeming to get to the end of the bit she was stitching and putting it down to give him her full attention, "So… how are you?"

"I'm going to be a dad," Michael blurted out without thinking, unable to meet her eyes but he noticed them widening in surprise anyway.

"Oh," Crystal said, sounding like she was composing herself, "I didn't realize you were seeing anyone."

"I'm not. I had a one night stand."

"Oh."

"While I was drunk," Michael added ashamedly and bit his tongue to himself saying that was what he was doing when Flynn died, that was a different conversation. He heard Crystal's sharp intake of breath, "I have a problem."

"Well, you're your father's son," Crystal commented and despite easing up on Jack, the comparison stung even though he already knew., "What are you going to do?"

"Nothing. She said I didn't have to," Michael told her and waited for her to go on, waited for her to tell him off but she didn't. She just gave a silent nod, continued gazing off into the same corner of the table his eyes occupied, "Aren't you going to tell me that I should be doing the 'right' thing? That I'm a terrible person for hating this unborn fetus and not wanting my life even more ruined then it is now?"

"Michael…" Crystal began and sighed heavily, "Look, I gave birth to you on my sixteenth birthday, from then on I was responsible not just for myself but for a whole other human life, your life. Ever since you turned sixteen I feel like a complete hypocrite trying to tell you to do anything, you're responsible for your own life now and all the mistakes that come with it."

"Oh."

"Although if I may ask, why do you have so much hatred and negativity for this child?"

"Well you know," Michael said, thinking it was obvious and she of all people should get it, "It ruined yours and Jack's lives having me as teenagers."

"You think having you ruined our lives?" Crystal asked of him, glancing at him with an expression of surprise.

"Well, yeah."

"Michael, having you didn't ruin our lives. We were perfectly capable of doing that ourselves," Crystal told him seriously, "I regret a lot of things in my life, most actually, every decision I ever make usually ends up being the wrong one. But the one thing that I never regret is my children's lives, having you and your siblings is the only worthwhile thing I've ever done in my life. I regret the circumstances but I don't regret your lives, you're the best thing that ever happened to me. And I'm pretty sure Jack feels the same, he has a good heart in there somewhere."

"But you'd be better off, you could have had a job and a better life if you weren't stuck with me," Michael protested.

"My problems don't revolve around you, I've never been that smart and I missed a lot growing up because I was ill with my defective heart, I still would've cancer which would've screwed up my education too. My grandfather would've still died, my grandmother still would've tried to stop that mugging and maybe I still would've dated bad people. You don't know but you're not responsible for everything wrong with my life, or Jack's," Crystal countered more firmly then she usually sounded, "Even if I did somehow a get good job despite being an idiot, I don't care. I'd rather have nothing and my children then all the money in the world and be alone, it's not even a question."

"Oh."

"My mistakes are my own, it's nothing to do with you."

"Well I never knew that," Michael admitted quietly, running a hand through his hair, "It still doesn't change my mind, I don't want this child. Everyone thinks I should just become overwhelmed with love and happy thoughts like everyone else."

"Michael, not everyone is instantly overwhelmed by love," Crystal offered as if it was obvious, "Sometimes it takes longer to bond with your child, even after they're born. Not everyone has that instant connection."

"Really?" Michael wondered, finding that slightly hard to believe, "Did you?"

"Me? I um…" Crystal started to say and trailed off, averting her eyes and becoming meek once more. She fidgeted slightly and looked ashamed, finally she sighed and continued quietly, "I hated Ivy. When I found out I was devastated, I didn't want to be pregnant. I didn't even feel like it was my child, because he raped me I felt like it was just his-"

"What?! Bob raped you?!" Michael interrupted in shock and Crystal very much looked like she wanted the ground to swallow her up, "But… How… I protected you."

"You had school, you had Annie, you went to bed. You didn't protect half as much as you thought you did, he'd just save it for when you weren't around to get in the way and beat me then. And… yeah. He said I gave up the right to say no when I married him… why did you think I kept having kids with the man I was trying to leave?"

"I um… err…" Michael babbled, feeling rather stupid as it seemed to make sense. He'd always just assumed he'd protected her, he felt both horribly guilty and had a renewed hatred for the long dead Bob but he swallowed that anger for the dead to focus on his sympathy for the live Crystal instead, "I'm sorry."

"It's okay, it doesn't matter anymore and it's not my point," Crystal brushed it off quickly, not seeming to want to talk about it, "My point is that I didn't want Ivy initially but I felt like it was the right thing to do, I thought calling her after my mother would make me care but it didn't. I was going to leave her, I thought maybe if I just took you and Agnes then Bob would still have Ivy and he'd be okay with us leaving somehow. I just wanted to put you and Agnes in the car and just drive until there was no road left, leave Bob and Ivy and all that pain behind."

"Why didn't you?" Michael asked curiously, still trying to process the revelation about Bob.

"Because she started crying when I was packing, she stopped when I picked her up. All she wanted was to be held by her mama. It made me think about what she wanted not what the baby wanted, I thought about her growing up without a mum and wondering why her family left behind feeling bad. Then I cared about her, when I started seeing her as a person not just a thing. She deserved the same as you and Agnes, I felt like it was better to stick to my original plan," Crystal explained uncomfortably, tears pricking her eyes, "Then Flynn… it wasn't so bad with Flynn, h- he was such a bubbly, happy person even as a baby it was hard to not come to love him. And Bertie too, although I didn't feel as against them from the start it was harder to connect. It was harder with Agnes too but not as bad but it wasn't the same as you so my point um… my point is that you could come to love your child, it's not always immediate."

"You think I should be involved with Easton?"

"Easton?"

"It's what she wants to call it, even though it's too soon to know the gender," Michael explained and silently cursed himself for using the name, "It's a stupid name. And it could still be a girl."

"I didn't think wizards could tell the gender," Crystal admitted in surprise.

"Oh they can't, I mean in general. The mother is a muggle, Dawn her name is," Michael told her and fidgeted, running his hand through his hair, "She's only just finishing up her first trimester, it erm… it happened on New Year's."

"I figured."

"You did?" Michael wondered in surprise.

"When you said the mother was a muggle I remembered that you were spending that night with someone and drinking."

"I know I shouldn't have done that, I should have been with Flynn-"

"What?" Crystal interrupted in confusion, glancing up at him, "Michael, I wouldn't say I'm glad you're having drunken one night stands but I am glad you weren't there."

"You don't feel like I should have been there to protect him?" Michael asked, feeling confused himself.

"If you were there you could have died as well, I was glad you weren't there in danger. Besides it's not your responsibility to protect us, it never should have been."

"But I might've been able to save him."

"Or you might've died as well," Crystal countered seriously and sadly, "I can barely stand losing one child…"

"Well I'm trying to quit drinking anyway," Michael said instead, deciding to not press the issue, "I have a problem, it made me realize I can't handle alcohol and I need to stop."

"Well I'm glad to hear that."

"Except when Dawn told me she was pregnant I freaked out and fell off the wagon," Michael continued ashamedly, averting his gaze, "I got drunk, got into a fight with my best friend and had a one night stand with a literal hag. So I lost my Hogsmeade privileges, everyone's respect including my own and Scorpius hates me now, he doesn't trust me anymore and I don't think he even considers me his best friend anymore. Not that I blame him I guess, I don't even feel like I can trust myself anymore. I feel so messed up and I'm screwing everything up but I don't know why, it's just everything and nothing."

"You've been through more than most people have in a lifetime, it's understandable you'll be a little messed up," Crystal offered gently and reached out to squeeze his hand comfortingly, "You'll get through it though, you'll find your way, sweetheart."

"How can you be so sure?"

"Because I have faith in you even if you don't have it in yourself right now."

"Thanks," Michael muttered, taking comfort from that and squeezing her hand back, "So what do you think I should do about Easton?"

"Whatever you want, Michael, you're old enough to make your own decisions," Crystal answered readily, "You just have to be prepared to live with the consequences, whatever you decide."

Albus lay on his bed, potions text books sprawled across the pillows as he scribbled down notes from them. He was still trying to study despite it being the break, he was very serious about trying harder to get grades for a better job to help provide for Lydia despite what his friends seemed to think. He put Potions as a priority since it was his best subject and what he wanted a career in, Vipera had said he'd have gotten an O for his OWL if his written work had been better as that was what let him down so he was trying to do better on that. He was visiting Olivia and Lydia as well, just a bit later as it was still morning and was excited for her to have her first Easter.

Except… what Michael said was still bothering him, Vern had died before knowing. They didn't know for sure what he would've said or done, he felt like a terrible person for doubting Vern. He found it hard to imagine Vern doing what Michael was doing especially when it was the long term girlfriend he cared about who was pregnant not some random stranger but then before this, he'd also have found it hard to imagine Michael doing what Michael was doing. So it left a niggling doubt in the back of his mind like a bad aftertaste because he didn't know for sure, he couldn't. Would Vern be glad Olivia had kept the baby? Would he be pleased Albus was trying so hard to support Lydia? Or would he really not care? He wished he could ask him, heck he wished Vern wasn't dead at all. He missed him, he kind of preferred being in Hogwarts not his empty room staring at the vacant bed that had been Vern's. He was glad to be away in another way though, he felt horrible lying to Scorpius about Molly. He worried for his cousin too, he hoped they found her. He was sick of losing people.

He heard the door, distracting him from his thoughts but ignored it. His mum was downstairs, she'd get it. He wasn't sure who it'd be, not family since they'd see each other for Easter dinner at the Burrow tomorrow. Freddie's girlfriend Caitlin had just given birth to their third child last night, it was their first son - and they'd named him Godric George – so everyone was looking forward to meeting the newest member of their family. In a way he wasn't looking forward to it, outside of Gray they were unaware they'd be celebrating while Molly was a prisoner and probably being tortured. Poor Lucy, if they didn't find Molly she'd have lost all her immediate family.

"AL!" his mum yelled up, shocking him so much his hand slipped and he spilled ink over his parchment, , "Your friend is here!"

"What?!" Albus called back in confusion as he hastily tried to stop the ink spreading by dabbing at it with his pajama bottoms, they just happened to be close to hand.

"I said YOUR FRIEND IS HERE!" his mum yelled up louder, not what he wanted as he'd wanted to know who as he wasn't expecting anyone, "Come down!"

"In a minute!" Albus cried, still trying to save his parchment and scrabbling for his wand. Where had he put that thing?

"Alright, I'll just send him up to you!"

"I SAID IN A MINUTE!" Albus screeched irritably, finally snatching his wand off the floor of all places and trying to remember the spell to clean up the ink.

"Hey," a familiar but unexpected and unwelcome voice greeted him with a knock on his already open door, he was so surprised he abandoned saving his notes to look to the door. It wasn't one of his friends at all, Pentakel was there. Pentakel. He strode over and waved his wand over the parchment, cleaning it up, "Better?"

"What are you doing here?" Albus demanded of the douchebag dating the love of his life, trying to sound civil for the sake of Pentakel being a 'guest' in his house but he wasn't sure he succeeded. Pentakel waved his wand over his now ink-stained pajama bottoms which cleaned them up to, show off Albus but thought but grumbled out a different reply, "Thanks."

"No problem," Pentakel answered as he pocketed his wand, standing there all fancy looking in clothes he hadn't spilled pumpkin juice on that morning. He cleared his throat, looking nervous, "I erm… I wanted to talk to you about something."

"Really? Here I thought you were here to dance the Can Can."

"What? No," Pentakel said with a scowl, "Why on Earth would you think that?"

"It was a joke," Albus pointed out in frustration, why did Abby like this guy again?

"Oh, right..."

"So what did you want to talk to me about?" Albus pressed and Pentakel fidgeted nervously again before sighing.

"Well… erm… I kind of get the impression that you don't really like me very much," Pentakel began, sounding surer of himself and paused slightly as if expecting Albus to say something but he didn't. Admitting he didn't like him to his face just seemed plain rude but he also didn't want to lie so the former Ravenclaw went on, "But Abby does and Abby also really likes you, you're her best friend. For her sake, I feel like we should try to get along."

"Uh-huh," Albus mused, not wanting to comment on how he secretly hoped she'd dump him at some point in the near future so they wouldn't have to get along because he'd be out of their lives forever. Then after a respectable amount of time post-break up he could ask her out and they'd live happily ever after.

"Here," Pentakel offered, handing him a box. Albus started to consider it strange that he'd give him a gift until he opened it and his jaw dropped, it was an engagement. A band of golden leaves with a diamond in the heart of some golden petals, like the center of a flower. Albus tore his emerald eyes back to Pentakel's sapphire ones, "I don't know what you think of me but I do genuinely love Abby with all my heart, she's amazing and I want to spend the rest of my life with her. I'm going to propose to her in a few days and if she says yes – which I hope she will, we are very happy together - we'll be married, it's only a few months until graduation so… we should really learn to get along."

"Wow," Albus breathed, looking back to the ring. Too shocked to be upset, "I didn't think you were that serious."

"Well… we are."

Pentakel took back the box, closing it and pocketing the ring once more. Albus averted his eyes, staring off and feeling rather like he'd swallowed a lump of ice that sat uncomfortably in the pit of his gut. He felt like he should be angrier, more jealous but mostly he just felt that cold resigned sadness in his stomach. It was over. They were to be married, this was serious and he'd been wrong about Pentakel. No chance of them breaking up, no chance of winning her over and living happily ever after. The only question was whether he should make things awkward and fight for her in a last ditch attempt even though he knew he couldn't compete with Pentakel or whether he just let her go, accept that she was happier without him.

"Well I've said what I came here to say," Pentakel commented, drawing Albus' attention as he realized he was just staring off into space and seemed to be unnerving Pentakel slightly, "I guess I'll be going now."

"How?" Albus asked quietly as Pentakel turned to leave, the former Ravenclaw looked back to him in surprise and hopefully hadn't noticed his voice cracking, "How are you going to propose, I mean."

"Oh. I'm going to take her out for a meal at-"

"No," Albus cut him off seriously, feeling like crying. He couldn't believe he was saying this, "You want to propose to her outside, some kind of garden or greenhouse. Put the ring in a flower - orchids are her favorite – not bloomed, when she leans in to look at it make it open to reveal the ring and get down on one knee. Tell her you love her, tell her that she's beautiful to you even though her sister is prettier than her, tell her she means the world to you and call her by her name - her proper name, not her nickname – when you ask her to marry you."

"Erm… why?"

"That's her dream proposal, has been since she was five. Although you probably don't need to mention her sister, the rest is the same though," Albus explained and finally glanced back to Pentakel who was looking at him with a curious expression.

"Why are you telling me this?" Pentakel asked quietly and Albus swallowed.

"Because if you're going to do this, you better do it perfect for her. And you better treat her right, you better make her happy or I am going to beat the bloody shit out of you," Albus told him seriously, gritting his teeth slightly at the end to try hide the fact he was on the verge of tears. He was really losing her, "If I can't be with her, she better be with someone who's going to treat her as well as I would've and making her dreams come true starts with this proposal."

"Okay," Pentakel nodded seriously, "I got it, I'll do right by her, Al, I swear. Thanks for the tip."

"Good luck, Pe- Sequoia," Albus added and Pentakel gave him a grateful smile as he left.

Albus didn't return the smile as he lay back down on his bed miserably, ignoring how the corners of the text books stabbed him in the brain. The gut wrenching feeling of loss hurt worse, the knowledge he had no chance with Abby now and he'd helped Pentakel with it. A part of him hated it but… well, he'd already told her how he felt and clearly didn't reciprocate. He had to let her go, let her be happy. He blinked back tears and rolled onto his side, catching sight of the picture of baby Lydia he had. He sat back up and picked up the photograph, Lydia looked back at him curiously reaching out with her little arms. He supposed it didn't really matter, being alone just meant he had more time for Lydia. She was the most important girl in his life now and he was okay with that.