Pseudotree's fanfic.

Disclaimer –I do not own The Melancholy of Suzumiya Haruhi.

Something you should be aware of –When I said 'more…"Kyon-like"' in the summary, I really, REALLY meant MORE. Also, note the "" (quotation marks).

Summary –This is a story in which Kyon behaves more…"Kyon-like" than in the original series. Many laughs, many tears. Also features Kyon-pursuing Haruhi.

O

Chapter 10

She sat there. She sat there, in front of her short table.

Drrrip. Plip plip.

...And poured him another cup. Kyon paced around Nagato's livingroom as he rambled on.

"...AND I PACED AROUND NAGATO'S LIVINGROOM AS I RAMBLED ON." Sip. He finished his fifth drink. "What was I... what was I expecTING WHEN I CAME HERE?"

"Back in the club... Nagato suddenly proposed that we... FOR GOODNESS SAKE, NAGATO! Do you have any idea how that sounded? People can get the wrong impression, you know.

So our dear, silent Nagato FREAKIN DRAGGED ME TO HER HOME. Calm down, calm down, I told myself, she probably wants... something that isn't on my mind. Yes. This is Nagato.

THEN I WALKED INTO HER APARTMENT SUITE, TO FIND THAT NO ONE ELSE WAS THERE. Just us. Okay, so Nagato of all people want some privacy, in her home, with no one else, with a guy who she wants to talk about important matters withWHY IS IT ALWAYS ALWAYS THE QUIET ONES WHO..."

Sip. "You know, this is pretty good, Nagato."

"Then she told me everything. Everything about... Haruhi?

Haruhi. That sweet, dreaming girl. So energetic, so full of passion for discovery. She... who is she? Who is she to us? To me? I thought I might have... I noticed how she looked at me. No. THE ECCENTRIC SUZUMIYA SMILED IN APPRECIATION AS I...

The source of the influx of data that THE BEING REFERRED TO AS THE DATA ENTITY SENSED THE INFLUX, Haruhi. Haruhi is the source. You claim that you're an alien who came here to keep an eye on her as ordered.

I'm sorry Nagato, but you do understand that this is hard for me to believI FELT UNSAFE AND CREEPED OUT BY HOW DELUSIONAL SHE IS. I mean, you really can't expect me to swallow all that you've said about... You're actually implying that Haruhi might be a-"

"...a god?" Haruhi repeated, blinking.

"Yes." replied Koizumi. "A god. Or at least, according to some factions."

She reeled back. 'A... god...?'

Amongst the quiet atmosphere of the small cafe in the evening, a ponytailed girl sat at her table open-mouthed, staring at the smiling young man on the opposite side. Eyes roved as if trying to detect anything out of place on the Esper's face, while a hand slowly drew upwards to cover her gaping jaw and her line of sight eventually lowered in thought.

Suzumiya Haruhi was confounded.

Here was a girl who, after grumbling about how something exciting like supernatural phenomenons never came her way, was suddenly presented with... Kyon. His strangeness had drawn the young woman to him, every actions, every gestures, every words he uttered filling her veins with an indescribable rush. She gathered her courage to ask if she can be with him as soon as she could, terrified of letting the chance slip by her. She followed him as they introduce themselves to their school. She had lunch with him every chance they got, drinking in his voice as light conversations were exchanged. She joyously helped in establishing the club, a reason she can use to see him and the other strange people they met nearly everyday. She finally found-

...Then came today. Haruhi was rather surprised by Koizumi suddenly coming up to her after the club closed for the day, asking her if she can join him later for a talk. Although he barely started to attend H.E.L.P. as a member and the girl didn't knew much about him, she always figured that he was a nice guy, if keeping a smile on for others despite his possibly epic dark past that she insists he has is any indication. But it still sounded suspiciously like he was asking for a date to her.

So she went.

They grabbed a nice spot by the window where the sun was starting to set. The handsome fellow member, now out of uniform, casually engaged in a light chatter with Haruhi. She remained patient, going with the flow of the conversation while anticipating his revealing of whatever crazy epic thing he has in mind. Needless to say, she couldn't handle the suspense and asked for it five minutes in.

"Ah, I wondered how long it would have take for you to crack." he said with a smile as he checked his wristwatch, then casually told her of...

Aliens. Time-travellers. Espers. Espers! The possible three-year origin of the world. A single being at the center of it all. FINALLY! The supernatural! The paranormal! The sexy-secret-agent-type sent to work with stealthy-cunning-extraterrestrial beings and fearless-busty-future-people to save the world, baby! What she wanted! What she got! What...

"...What..."

"......"

"...the HELL?!"

(Koizumi just might have flinched from the outburst. Just might have.)

Okay. So that new guy in your club with this weird smirk on his face all the time ask you out of the blue to meetcha at that coffee place, LOL! And after some dawdling about "yeah today was so slow oh man did you know that Taro from next class, like, asked her out right there where HEY I asked for extra cream in mine and some more of that... that crunchy thingy!" Then, then he's like, get this- "So I'm totally an Esper, you know? And oh, that Yuki-chan is like, such an aaalien! Mikuru is the hotness. Also, she was sent here for a mission by an international organization in the future of unknown era, of which remains unknown due to the fact that she is not yet authorized by her superiors to reveal classified informations of such magnitude. Yadi-yadi-yada, some phenomenal yammer yammer, WAAAH are you going to finish that?! Gimme! OMPH. Om nom nomm mb-by the mm-way, did I mention that all of us were born when we started middle school?"

End Haruhi-audio reception summation.

Gathering herself, she quietly retracted from the front of Koizumi's spittle-covered face, and sat back down on the cushioned seat. Ignoring the incredulous look from the other occupants of the cafe as if nothing happened, the girl uncharacteristically straightened her posture in a calm, serene manner, folding her hands together and closing her eyes. She took a deep breath.

"..."

"...Um..." started Koizumi in a slightly nervous tone. He then settled back in silence.

Haruhi took her time in prolonging the lingering of the peaceful, yet awkward atmosphere. She exuded peace, radiated peace, glowed like a night-light in peace, and was generally just so plain peaceful that Koizumi wondered if she was doing it on purpose to make him squirm.

"Squirming yet?" she asked suddenly.

"Oh... Ohh! Ha ha..."

She continued. "You..."

"You've made some... fantastic claims. The supernatural kind. The paranormal kind. The everything-I-ever-wanted-in-one-delicious-package kind.

And judging by the sheer sincerity and eloquence of your explanation... I believe that you believe what you are saying."

Koizumi mentally praised his own Mad Linguistic Skillz.

"However..."

CONK.

Wincing, the young man blinked as a jolt of pain shot down from where Haruhi bopped him.

"Silly Koizumi! I'm not stupid enough to swallow that much right off the bat- Ya haven't even shown me da juicy stuff, man!" exclaimed she. "Where are the bent spoons? Where are the Gazillion-tetrabyte future-phones? Where are the samples of alien-droppings? And where...

Where's the evidence that our awesome but admittedly too-human Kyon is, of all things, a god?"

The plan was simple. Tell Kyon that Haruhi is the cause. Tell Haruhi that Kyon is the cause. Stir well, add cilantro.

By telling the other about the creation of this world, they gain a valuable ally who wields incredible amount of influence over the subject. And getting the subject to think that the other is the subject, while slightly risky, will make suspecting the subject's own self as the subject highly unlikely. It was discussed at length. It was planned step by step. It was handled by the best agents they had to offer.

It was one of the very few things that the three organizations agreed on.

Mikuru let out a sigh. The relations between the Time-travellers and Espers were always strained, and many of the higher-ups openly detested the Aliens. Personally, she felt that they were being overly territorial due to perceived rivalries. Urk, those hard-headed bigots! The young Asahina was glad to find that Koizumi and Nagato are civil (Of course, in Nagato's case, it's hard to tell).

Walking in place and craning her neck slightly, she waited for them. The calls she got from the two yesterday can be easily summarized as- "Neither of them were convinced." No matter- they won't be in disbelief long. She knew it as well as she knew that their seemingly dangerous plan will eventually bring the best results.

Tap tap tap...

Ah, here they are now to discuss her upcoming talk with Kyon and Haruhi. She wondered if Koizumi brought drinks today, for once.

O

General Author's Note

Here is the tenth, with a major part of the plot, Haruhi sitting still, and Yuki singing to ponies off stage. Oh, did you noticed the way the god in this story was referred? Vague.

The following is a little alternate scene. Read it if you have no reason not-not-not to.

Alternate Scene Commence!

Tap tap tap...

Ah, here they are now to discuss her upcoming talk with Kyon and Haruhi. She wondered if Koizumi brought drinks today, for once.

Click-click.

"We're here, Asahina-sa... Why do you have a lampshade on your head?"

"Didja bring the Bud Ligh-"

"I think you've had quite enough." said Yuki, finally speaking to Mikuru on-screen and therefore shocking everybody from the Data Entity to Fido so much that everything ceased to exist. Again.

"...Well, that's one way to make our jobs easier." Or so Koizumi would have uttered, had he been still with us.

Alternate Scene End!

That reminds me- the fic now has chapters in double digits. I suppose that's something.

Expect the next one in about a month or so, as usual.

Beta read by Kildred.