Life and Love: Chapter 10
Chikorita-Trainer1
T
Disclaimer: I don't own Batman.
On the ride back to the orphanage, Damian and Colin were outwardly quiet, but on the inside, their systems were buzzing with excitement, attraction, energy and all other forms of stimuli that affect two people newly in love. The boys held hands in the back seat as Alfred drove them both down to St. Aden's.
"We have arrived, Master Colin," the butler said, stepping out of the car and walking around to open the side door.
"I'll see you later," said Colin, unbuckling his seatbelt. Damian leaned over and kissed his boyfriend on the cheek, just before Alfred opened the door.
"Goodnight," he said.
"Goodnight," whispered Colin. Then the redhead got out of the car and walked back into the orphanage.
"Thanks for everything, Mr. Pennyworth!" he called.
"You're entirely welcome, Master Colin," called Alfred. Once seeing that Colin had made it safely inside, the butler got back into the car and drove Damian home.
Damian was silent the entire ride. Alfred knew it was because he was thinking, and he didn't wish to interrupt the boy's blissful thoughts or ask questions that would make Damian uncomfortable.
All Damian could do was think about the kisses he and Colin had shared. He thought either or both of them would be grossed out, but when they actually started doing it, it wasn't so bad. Having a warm face pushed up against another was a pleasant sensation, and did feel intimate enough to qualify as an activity one should only do with someone they love, so he liked that it was personal and special. He couldn't wait to do it again.
Meanwhile, in the Batcave, Tim was working out, fighting a punching bag, when his phone dinged. He grabbed it and checked what the notification was, thinking it was from Dick, who was supposed to meet him in the Cave.
It was from Dick, but it wasn't a message.
It was a picture.
Of Colin and Damian kissing.
Oh, for shit's sake, thought Tim. Just then, Dick came bouncing down the stairs into the Cave, grinning from ear to ear.
"Can you believe it?!" he squealed. "Is this not the cutest thing you've ever seen? Damian's gay! And he has a little boyfriend! How cute is that?!"
"I know," said Tim.
"I can't believe I never picked up on it before," said Dick, staring at his phone. "Obviously there are different WAYS a person can be gay, they're not all going to be feminine and flamboyant. But I never suspected it!"
"Dick-"
"I wonder who that kid is. I don't think I've ever seen him before."
"Dick…"
"Do you think Bruce knows? Wait, he's Batman, of course he knows. Probably knew before Damian did-"
"DICK!"
"What?"
"Bruce already knows. And so does Alfred, and so do I."
"Since when?" asked Dick, looking slightly offended.
"Since about a month ago," said Tim. "Damian told me he thought he might be gay, and that there was a boy he liked."
"Wait- when was this?"
"I said, about a month ago."
"Why didn't he tell me? I could have helped him out."
"He was too embarrassed. Still is, probably."
"Yeah, but, I would never reject him. He has to know I'm not homophobic," said Dick.
"It was never about homophobia," said Tim.
"So why did he tell you before me? Don't you two hate each other?"
"That's precisely the reason he DID, Dick!" said Tim. "Because he and I aren't that close, because we already share a pretty antagonistic relationship, he felt that if the conversation were to turn awkward or ugly, nothing of value would be lost."
"And did it?"
"No. I told him that there's nothing wrong with being gay and that he has nothing to feel embarrassed about."
"But what was he afraid I would do?" asked Dick. Tim opened his mouth, but couldn't form an answer.
"I don't know," he said. "But I couldn't tell you because he told me to keep it a secret until he was ready. And I did. And he told Bruce a few nights ago, and then Bruce invited Colin- that's the kid's name, Colin, over for dinner. I walked in on them tonight, but didn't want to get to involved."
"Why would he hide it from me?" Dick asked again, wistfully.
"What were you doing, sneaking around, spying on them in the first place?" Tim demanded.
"I was looking for you! You were supposed to meet me here, and you weren't here when I showed up!"
"You could have just called me, you know!" yelled Tim.
"What in the hell are you two screaming about, now?" grumbled Bruce as he stalked into the Cave.
"Dick's mad because nobody told him that Damian's gay," said Tim.
"I'm not mad, I'm just disappointed that no one bothered to share it with me," said Dick.
"What is this? You took a picture of them? Give me that!" snarled Bruce, grabbing Dick's phone and immediately deleting the picture. "Have some respect for the boy's privacy, Dick!"
"It wouldn't BE about privacy if someone had just told me! Why am I the only person here who didn't know?"
"Ask Damian!" yelled Tim. "He'll probably be mad as hell you spied on him, but he's the only one who can give you that answer."
"Fine, I will!" said Dick, taking his phone back from Bruce and turning to go upstairs.
"Not NOW, idiot!" cried Tim. "Are we going to solve this case or aren't we?"
"Oh yeah," said Dick, sheepishly turning back around. "But I am going to ask him about this later."
A few nights later, Nightwing caught up with Robin on a rooftop.
"What's up, Little D?" he asked.
"'Little D?' Really?" groaned Robin, reminding his brother that they were never to use their real names, or even nicknames in the field.
"Haven't seen you in a while. Everything OK?"
"Fine. Why wouldn't it be?" Damian rebuffed. Nightwing shrugged.
"I don't know. Just thought you might have something you wanted to talk about," said the elder crime fighter.
" tt. Certainly nothing I wish to discuss with you," Robin sneered.
"What's that supposed to mean?" Nightwing asked, trying to convey to Damian that he wanted to talk about IT. Robin, of course, suspected it, but wasn't about to talk about it out in the field.
"Isn't that self-explanatory?" grumbled Robin. "Are you interested in stopping crime tonight, or did you just come here to stick your nose in my business?"
Nightwing rolled his eyes, personally offended by his little brother's words.
"You know what? Forget it," he retorted. "Just remember one thing, kid. You are one of the luckiest kids in the world. You have more privilege and opportunities than the 1%. You have a whole family of people who care about you, so much, so maybe don't bite people's heads off when they show a general interest in your life, 'K?"
Nightwing jumped off the building and disappeared into the city, leaving Robin more confused and suspicious than he had been in months.
"What were you implying, tonight?" the child demanded when he caught up with Dick later on in the halls of Wayne Manor.
"When?" asked Dick.
"Tonight, on the rooftop! All you and Drake ever do is call me spoiled brat and gang up on me! Why can't you just ever SAY what's on your mind? Why do you always have to hide behind snide comments and backhanded implications? Why must you always be such an EMOTIONAL COWARD?!"
Dick's eyelids lowered and his expression changed into something resembling an emoticon made up of a dash, and underscore, and another dash.
"Damian," Dick began with a sigh. "Come with me." And the two brothers entered Dick's old room and sat down on the bed. "Why did you feel you couldn't tell me you were gay?"
Damian's eyes widened in horror and his chest clenched up as if he'd just been told he had less than a month to live. His body went cold, then hot, then cold again so quickly he thought he was going through menopause. He felt tears well up in his eyes, and then he blinked them back.
"Who told you?" he muttered under his breath.
"No one," said Dick. "Though I wish someone had."
"Was it obvious? Do you have gaydar or whatever the hell-"
"Damian, I saw you and your little boyfriend making out in the hall last week."
Damian's face turned red and his eyebrows arched in offense and anger.
"WE WEREN'T….doing that!" he insisted.
"Kissing, whatever," Dick corrected himself. "That's not even important. I wish that wasn't how I had found out-"
"Is this what you do?! Go around, spying one me, trying to find out if I engage in normal, human activities? You can't take my word for anything so you have to-"
"DAMN IT, DAMIAN, I JUST WANT TO KNOW WHY YOU FELT YOU COULDN'T TELL ME!" Dick finally explained. Damian looked down and sighed.
"It's not because I thought you were homophobic," he stated.
"OK, then why?"
"It's embarrassing!" the child cried. "It would be embarrassing if I had a girlfriend, let alone a BOYFRIEND. OK? It's embarrassing and uncomfortable and awkward and I just didn't want to tell you right away."
"What did you think I would say? Or do?" Dick asked softly, placing his hand on Damian's small shoulder.
"I thought you'd make fun of me," Damian admitted. "Not in a mean, oppressive way, but you always tease me about everything! Every time I do something that I, like, wasn't raised to do, or start to like something, you always act like it's "so cute" to see me acting like a "normal kid" or something. It really bothers me, and it doesn't make me feel comfortable at all!" Damian's voice was beginning to crack at the end of this explanation.
Dick's expression softened as he absorbed what his little brother had just told him. He removed his hand from Damian's shoulder and put it back in his own lap, and turned away.
"It's done out of love," he tried.
"Well, I hate it!" cried Damian. "It's like you go out of your way to point out that I'm different, or weird, or not normal! It's not fun to always be criticized for being different, and you only make it MORE prevalent that I'm different when I do something you consider "normal" and you make fun of me for it!"
"OK, I'm sorry about that, Damian. I am. I tease people. It's part of being a big brother."
"Says who?" snapped Damian. "Where is it written that a big brother HAS to be a pain in the ass to his younger siblings?"
Dick chuckled. "I don't know, Damian. It's just something that come naturally. An assertion of dominance, I guess. I don't want to hurt your feelings, but I do want you to understand that you hurt mine."
"How?" Damian challenged.
"I have spent a lot of time and energy on you," said Dick. "I was there for you when Bruce couldn't be. I taught you, trained you, reassured you when you were upset."
"So?"
"So I deserve to know what's going on in your life, even if it's embarrassing. I care about you, and I want to help you and understand you as well as I can. I don't know if you're old enough to understand this, but confiding in a person is a sign of trust, and a sign of respect."
"Respect? How?"
"It shows that you hold the person in high regard as someone you can trust with your deepest secrets. It makes the person you're sharing them with feel good, and feel like they must mean a lot to you if you go to them for advice or confession."
Damian thought about this for a moment. He thought about how it made him feel when his father would keep things from him, and how it really hurt his feelings because it made him feel like his father didn't trust him. Or that he thought less of him, thought he didn't deserve to have all the same information the rest of the family did.
"OK, I see your point, Grayson," he admitted. "And I was going to tell you, eventually. Just not anytime soon."
"Well, like I said, I wish I hadn't found out the way I did."
Damian groaned and looked away.
"But I am happy for you, kid," Dick said. "Love is precious, and you deserve to experience it just as much as anyone else."
"Yeah, saying corny things like that doesn't help, either!" he growled. Dick could only laugh.
"Sorry. Can you at least tell me how you met the kid and what he means to you?" Dick said, resting his chin on his hand and sliding down on the bed so that he was lying on his side, propped up on his elbow.
"Well, remember when we were investigating those slaughtered kids that Humpty Dumpty had tried to "put back together"?"
"Yeah?"
And Damian told Dick the whole story.
END OF CHAPTER 10
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