A/N: Thanks again to all the wonderful people who read, reviewed, favorited, got off on...etc my story :p Not a lot of sexy goodness for a few because its time for some characters to die. And I promise Ive never written a story before, I just read ALOT. And alot of it is paranormal romance. So if you want a euphemism for naughty bits then Im your gal! And Ive led a lot of angsty life so well the feelings are familiar enough to me to write about. Again I wish you could see inside my head because these two are totally fucked up by this point and Im not sure I conveyed that enough. I wrote this chapter last weekend and I actually spent all week trying to make it darker and didnt really succeed. Im ok with it, but if you will imagine the worst moment in your life before you read this then maybe you will see it with the right kind of skewed emotions.
Chapter 10: The Games We Play
A boy with a coin he found in the weeds
With bullets and pages of trade magazines
Close to a car that flipped on the turn
When God left the ground to circle the world
A girl with a bird she found in the snow
Then flew up her gown and that's how she knows
If God made her eyes for crying at birth
Then left the ground to circle the earth
A boy with a coin he crammed in his jeans
Then making a wish he tossed in the sea
Walked to a town that all of us burn
When God left the ground to circle the world
Iron and Wine-"Boy With a Coin"
When another man's name left her lips as she lay bared beneath him, something inside him broke. In a flash he was gone, the air above her suddenly empty, her body left cold without his warmth. She clasped her hands to her mouth as she realized what she had done. She had seen the brief moment of despair in his eyes before he had vanished, moving quicker than she could follow. The tears began to roll down her cheeks as she curled herself into a ball and began to sob out his name.
Ulquiorra paused in the hallway to dress quickly in the clothes he had snagged as he sonidoed from their bed. He heard her call out to him, the pain in her voice apparent. But the pain she felt wasn't enough for him. She could cry for him for a lifetime and it would never be enough. He wanted to return to their room, to drench their bed in rivulets of her blood as he took her brutally before ripping out the beating organ of her heart. The source of his pain. Then he could actually possess it. It would be only his to hold. He had started to believe her tales of the heart and the love it could offer another. While he was unsure of his own abilities to love, he had been so sure of hers, of the words she had told him. But she had said those words before, to another, hadn't she? At the mention of that cursed shinigami trash, he remembered her previous declaration of love to that boy. And how had she honored her love to the shinigami? By allowing the enemy to touch her freely. By calling out the enemy's name during the intimate moments they had shared over the last month. By offering her heart and her innocence to him. The enemy. That was all her love was worth. She gave it freely to whatever man was in her sphere of influence. And he had fallen for it. He had been willing to forsake his master and his rank for her. Death would be too good for the harlot. Before she died, and she would, by his hand alone, he would drag out her suffering. But he was done with the impulsive behavior he had exhibited with her. He would carry out his revenge true to his nature. Every bite he would take of her soul would be carefully planned and executed so as to cause the most suffering possible. Ulquiorra may not have understood love, but despair was something he excelled at, and he would bring Orihime nothing but his best. He escaped her tortured cries, heading toward the roof of Los Noches to begin his planning.
Surely he will come back. I was just surprised. But Ichigo is here! But I've fallen in love Ulquiorra. Oh kami, what have I done? Orihime tortured herself as the day came to its finish and he had yet to return. She couldn't move. The knocks at her door signaling her meals, came and went unanswered. Gradually her tears dried, and her red swollen eyes just stared across the room to the windowed doors leading to the balcony and to the moon. The same moon her would be lover also stared obsessively at as he plotted her downfall.
He heard his master's mental summons and began to descend from the top of the tower he had sat on for the last day. Ulquiorra had finally found himself again. All the annoying emotions the girl had brought about in him had been streamlined into one, hatred. He felt the blackness of his soul call to him and he longed to unleash the full strength of his fury. As he walked through the halls, the lesser Arrancar he passed all shrank back from the pulses of dark spiritual energy that emanated from him. Their fear fed his dark soul and he drank greedily of the bitter stench that signaled their fright. But they were not his target. He closed his mind to them and reached out to find the one he sought. The sexta was nearby. He quickly caught up to the blue haired man.
Grimmjow. As you are aware, our Lord has summoned us. He has requested the presence of the girl as well. I have certain matters I must attend to, so I am leaving her care to you for the moment. I trust you will keep her safe. He indeed wanted her kept safe. So that he could be the one to break her.
Umm yeah sure, I can get the Princess. Grimmjow stared hard at Ulquiorra for a moment before turning back towards the girl's room. Something was off about the pale Espada. Although he absolutely loathed Ulquiorra, they had developed a truce of sorts over their mutual affection for the girl. He had seen the way the two looked at each other, and in a rarity for him, had kept his mouth shut about it. Orihime had come to mean more to him than he cared to admit. He had always been an outcast and yet she had welcomed him, like a friend. Her smile soothed the savage beast that had always raged within him, his lust for blood cooled in her presence. And he had seen the change in the normally frigid Ulquiorra. The way he gravitated towards her. His once dead eyes had shown light when he was with her. But that was gone now. The emerald eyes that glanced at him were empty pools once again. Concern for the girl flooded his veins and he sonidoed to her door. He knocked once, but he could hear nothing within the rooms. He began to bang loudly on the door but he was met with only silence. Finally he just kicked in the door. He found her still lying on the bed she had shared with Ulquiorra. Her naked body was curled in on itself, her skin pale and shivering as she lay bare to the cold air. Her eyes were swollen and red, the whites bloodshot as she stared unseeing into space. For a moment fear leapt into his heart as he thought she was dead. But then he saw the unsteady rise and fall of her ribcage.
Dammit Princess, what did that bastard do to you? He covered her with a blanket as he sat on the bed beside her. He had seen no sign of injury and the air was free of the sharp metallic scent of blood. When she didn't answer he began to shake her. She slowly slid her red eyes to him and whispered He left me.
He gave into his urges and pulled her into his lap, tucking her head under his chin as he held her. She didn't cry, but her arms tightened around him, and her breath came out in shaky gasps.
Princess. I will personally make him pay for you. But you have to remember where you are. You can't survive here if you are weak. You must do as we all did and channel the pain into a purpose, into strength. And you have to do it now. Aizen has summoned us all, no doubt in regards to your friends' entrance into Hueco Mundo. And the fucker will be there too. Now quickly shower and use your fairies or whatever to make your face look better cause you kinda look like shit.
She knew he was right. She had survived Ichigo's rejection. Well in truth, Ichigo had never been able to reject her because she had never confessed her feelings to him. At least when he was conscious. And she was glad she hadn't. The feelings she felt for Ulquiorra made her realize her infatuation with Ichigo had been nothing more than hero-worship, a school girl crush. Ichigo had never seen her as a woman. He merely saw her as weak, a friend to protect because she couldn't protect herself. Ulquiorra had never treated her that way. He had seen something else in her. Something she didn't know existed. When he had looked at her, she had for a moment been someone else's obsession. This may hurt a million times worse that Ichigo's imaginary rejection, but she had survived everything life had thrown at her. Abusive parents, cruel classmates, the loss of her brother, the weakness of her heart. Had Ulquiorra cared anymore, she knew he would have wanted her to lock her feelings down tight, to stand up strong and fight, even if her doom was assured. She quickly freshened up and used her Shun Shun Rikka as Grimmjow had suggested and emerged from the bathroom looking more like herself. At least at first glance. Her eyes actually scared Grimmjow. He had just seen that look on the cuatro's face. It was the stare of a person with nothing left to lose. But they were out of time, and dealing with other's personal issues wasn't something he was good at anyways. He grabbed her hand and led her out the door towards the meeting room.
When they arrived, most of the Espada were already present and a large grouping of numeros and privaron, the original Espada, were packed along the walls. Ulquiorra sat at his usual spot, the chair to his right vacant. My chair. Grimmjow gave her a little push and a nod and went around the table to his seat across from her. Orihime sucked in her breath and walked confidently to her chair, sitting down, pointedly ignoring the man to her left.
He had known the moment she walked in the door with Grimmjow. He was so attuned to her scent as well as her spiritual pressure that he could have found her anywhere. But he did not turn. When she sat beside him, he shifted his gaze slightly towards her. Nothing about her indicated that she felt any remorse about what she had done to him. She had played him well. His hand twitched with the urge to snap her delicate neck, but he simply stuck it in his pocket and closed his eyes, looking to all the world as if he was bored.
Orihime could feel the waves of despair coming off of him and she longed to reach out to him. She knew she had hurt him and she desperately longed to soothe him. But now was not the time. She needed to hear about her friends first.
The soft talk in the room ceased as Aizen entered, flanked by Gin and another shinigami traitor, Tosen Kaname.
Hello my children. Please listen carefully. Our home is under attack. There are three intruders. Kaname, the visual if you please.
The blind ex shinigami turned on a projector of sorts. Orihime had to stifle a gasp as the images of her friends played in front of her.
They are Ishida Uryuu. Sado Yasutora. And Kurosaki Ichigo. Orihime saw Grimmjow's jaw clench at the mention of Ichigo. Several of the other Espada began to mock the thought that these three posed any threat to them. Aizen cleared his throat to regain their focus.
Do not take them lightly. These are the humans formerly known as Ryoka, who with just four people marched into Soul Society and challenged the Gotei 13 to battle. A dark skinned man with a mohawk and a skull earring in one ear noted that there were only three intruders and queried as to where the fourth was.
Aizen smiled widely at Orihime. It was none other than our own Inoue Orihime.
Nnoitra giggled. So they came to save their friend. That's great! But they look so weak.
The third Espada, Haribel, chastised Nnoitra for failing to heed Aizen's command to not underestimate the intruders. Their argument was cut short but the screech of a chair across the floor as Grimmjow suddenly stood up and began to walk out. All eyes turned to watch him.
Tosen called out to him. Grimmjow, where are you going?
Orihime's eyes grew wide at his answer. To kill them. It's best to crush insects quickly once they've gotten inside, right?
Lord Aizen has not given any orders yet, sit down. Tosen commanded him.
Its on Aizen-sama's behalf that I'm gonna go crush them! Grimmjow growled at the man.
Grimmjow. Aizen called out pleasantly. I'm pleased that you would mobilize on my behalf, but I'm still in the middle of talking. Could you please return to your seat? The blue haired man just stared at Aizen. Orihime watched the scene unfold. She was concerned for Grimmjow, but she didn't understand why he was so eager to kill her friends.
What's wrong? As Grimmjow just stood there, Aizen suddenly released his spiritual pressure. I can't hear you Grimmjow. All of the numeros dropped to their knees holding their heads in pain. A few even passed out immediately. The Espada were affected as well. The top four just bowed their heads against the pressure as the other five slumped in their chairs. As the pressure continued, Orihime began to faint as Grimmjow was forced to his knees. Ulquiorra caught her before her head could hit the table. He was not gentle as he propped her back up against the table. As Grimmjow hit the floor, the pressure was eased.
I'm so glad you understand. Ladies and gentlemen, as you can see there are three enemies. Underestimating them would be foolish, but there is no need to make a fuss either. Each of you should return to your chambers and behave normally. Do not be haughty. Do not get impatient. Just sit and wait for the enemy. Do not fear. Even if something should happen, as long as you walk with me, there will be no enemies in our way. You are dismissed.
Ulquiorra immediately stood and strode from the room. Orihime walked over to help Grimmjow who just waved her off. She knew he wouldn't want to look weak in front of the others so she just waited for him to stand as Arrancar swirled around her, more than one shooting hostile stares in her direction. Grimmjow recovered enough to begin to lead them from the room. As the exited, Orihime caught sight of Ulquiorra and her heart stopped. He was standing there, his hands typically in his pockets. But leaning close to him, her hand on his chest was the purple haired girl from the other day, Cirruci. Ulquiorra's eyes slid to catch Orihime's as she stared at the scene in front of her. He made eye contact but then immediately shifted his gaze back to his companion. The girl glanced around him to see what he had been looking at, and she smirked as she caught sight of Orihime. Orihime's jaw dropped as the girl blew her a kiss before resuming her conversation with Ulquiorra. She just stood there in shock until she felt a gentle tugging at her arm.
C'mon Princess. There's no reason for you to see this. She allowed him to lead her away. When they reached her door, he left her and even though she wanted to hang on to him, she knew he was fighting his own demons, so she let him go with a quick squeeze to his hand.
Ulquiorra hadn't really wanted the Privaron to touch him. The silly girl had felt flattered when he had spoken to her, the first time he had initiated a conversation with an Arrancar female. She had immediately begun working at seducing him; which had the opposite effect of turning him off. It was so different from Orihime's shy advances. He felt miserable as the pushy Arrancar female began to stroke his arm and whisper flattering words at him. He perked up as he felt Orihime coming out of the meeting. He knew the moment her eyes had found him as desire crept over his body. He glanced over to her, wanting to see the look on her face and he was rewarded with the sight of her pained expression. But then Grimmjow had grabbed her hand, taking her away from him. His elation at paining her faltered as he watched the girls pale hand intertwined with another's. The trash in front of him had sensed his lust and mistaken it as directed towards her. She began to lightly stroke his chest with her fingernails. When she looked into his eyes, she saw him looking away at her. She followed his line of sight and caught a glimpse of the auburn haired human he was rumored to have been having an affair with. But when he turned away and looked back at her, she thought she had won. She grinned a feral grin and blew a kiss at the silly human who had thought she could hold an Espada. But her smile faltered when, as soon as the woman was out of sight, the cuatro abruptly turned from her and left without a word. He had barely contained his need to flee until after Orihime had left. The Privaron's hand on his chest had turned his stomach and had he been human he would have vomited. As it was, he contained his revulsion till after she had left and then quickly escaped the trashy female in front of him, heading back to his spot on the roof.
Orihime sat on the couch. She had no desire to return to their bedroom. Images of Ulquiorra in their bed with that Arrancar girl rose in her mind. She knew the pleasure he was capable of giving, but he had told her he only felt that way for her. But he was a male in his prime and it was unlikely she had ever satisfied him. In light of her betrayal of course he would go find a woman with more skills than hers. She should probably leave so he could have his room back. But she didn't know where to go. She sat there and concentrated on the reiatsu of her friends. She could feel it fluctuating so she assumed they had met their first battle. Her heart felt light when they all stabilized. She hadn't meant for them to come for her, but she couldn't help but yearn for them to take her home. The servant Arrancar came and went and yet she didn't eat. She resumed her old tricks and flushed the meal down the toilet. Then she just sat still and prayed for her friends. She had no idea how long she sat there before she felt the appearance of two new but familiar spiritual pressures. It seemed as if Rukia and Renji had joined the others. She was glad Rukia was there. She would keep Ichigo from doing something dumber than he already had by coming to Hueco Mundo. She stared at the moon as she tried to think of a way to help them. But no answers came.
That is how he found her when he returned to the room. She was as captivating as ever in the silver light, but when she didn't even turn to look at him, he remembered that she was no longer his, if she had ever been. He spoke coldly to her.
Your nakama have indeed come to rescue you. But for you that should no longer hold any meaning. For in both mind…and body, you are already our comrade. He had emphasized the word body to remind her of where she had been just yesterday. Writhing under him in pleasure, asking him to take her fully. Surely if her nakama knew this, they would forsake her. And he planned on making them fully aware, wanting to see her face as they turned from her.
Orihime could no longer feel any kindness from the man she had given her heart to. And she felt it was her fault. His tie to his emotions had been fragile and she had broken it. But this man would not cry for her. In all likelihood he would instead break her into pieces. She had known what kind of male he was. A raw, incomplete man capable of horrible violence and cruelty. Unforgiving. But she forgave him. Because she loved him still. She wouldn't blame him for the circumstances of his birth in this world. She had proven she could heal him. But she had sentenced him back to the darkness with her callous actions. She would accept whatever it took to make it up to him. She hoped to heal him again, but if he desired her pain as payment, she would give it to him. Besides, if he killed her then her friends would have no reason to remain here and could return safely to the World of the Living. So she just lowered her head.
Seeing her cow to him made him feel angry. She was playing games again. He wanted to see the fire in her eyes again. So he pressed her further.
Say it. For just what purpose do your mind and body exist?
Yes sir. She whispered. They exist for Aizen-sama and his will.
He stared at her a moment more before turning and walking out. He had enjoyed forcing her to assert her loyalty. He would force her to do many things before he was finished with her. He strode off to the training room, for once looking for a fight.
She couldn't believe the way things had turned out. She wandered around the rooms they had shared before she fell into their bed; the tears she had thought were dry, pouring forth once more. She buried her face in his pillow, smelling his unique scent of a winter forest. She hugged the pillow to her tight as she fell into an uneasy sleep. No one came the next day except for the servant to deliver her meals. She dumped them as soon as he left and resumed her watch of the desert. She could feel all of her friends fighting. Each wound they suffered cut across her heart. The next day was the same. She worried for everyone. For her friends. For Ulquiorra. For Grimmjow. The loneliness began to overtake her as it had the first time. It was far sharper this time though with the loss of Ulquiorra. She became increasingly desperate, her cheery nature no longer able to sustain her resolve. She tried to drown herself in her bath the next day. But her survival instincts were too strong and she rose to the surface sputtering and coughing up water. That night a knife arrived with her meal. She tried to use it to open her veins but the blade was too dull. She dug in harder but only succeeded in making angry red lines down her wrists. She cried out in frustration as she threw the knife across the room where it bounced off the wall. Suddenly the air shifted and she felt the drop in the spiritual pressure that had been raging across the desert for days. She turned to the window, her heart in her throat. No, it can't be. Her head snapped back to the door as she heard it open.
Ulquiorra was pleased that one of her nakama had fallen. Now was the time to rub salt in her wounds. She showed more life when he entered, glaring at him. He glanced briefly at the knife glittering on the floor before turning to stare her down.
So it seems you've noticed. It appears that fool Nnoitra got impatient. Even though he was ordered to stay in his rooms.
Orihime interrupted him. Sado-kun is NOT dead.
He glanced away from her at a knock at the door.
He is NOT dead. She stated firmly again, her eyes flaring with intensity. The sight captured his attention for a moment and much to his chagrin he began to grow hard for her. Her defiance had always turned him on. He turned from her and quickly adjusted himself before he went to open the door to allow the servant to enter with her meal. She was suddenly very angry at the servant and at the situation. No matter what was going on those damn meals kept appearing as though she was supposed to act normal in this cursed place.
Dinner time woman. Now eat.
She stubbornly tilted her chin back and crossed her arms in front of her chest. I don't want it.
We've been over this. It is your duty to preserve your life until Aizen-sama calls for you. Do not act like a child. Eat. She turned from him, gazing instead at the window in the room. Even now she dares to defy me? Is she trying to provoke a response from me? He had conveniently forgotten that just days before he had wished for her defiance. Now however it annoyed him as his body responded to his longing for her.
Fine. Shall I force it down your throat? Or would you prefer me to tie you down and have your meals delivered intravenously?
She continued to ignore him as she again reaffirmed to herself that her friend was not dead. Her quiet defiance hit a nerve and words, cruel words, began to flow from his mouth.
Such persistence. Dead or alive, either way will do. What would you have me say? "Don't worry, I'm sure he is still alive"? Ridiculous. I'm not here to comfort you. I don't understand why you are so fixated on life and death. At any rate, your precious nakama will soon be annihilated. What does it matter if that's one step closer? Her eyes grew wide at his words and tears began to cloud her vision. Encouraged by her response he continued his verbal assault.
They should have seen this coming from the start.
Stop it…she begged of him, but he continued to exploit her heart that he hated so much.
If they couldn't see it coming, the fault lies in their own foolishness. Laughing them off as a group of idiots would be far more appropriate. Why can't you do that? If it were me, and my friends entered Hueco Mundo without first gauging their strength, I'd be infuriated by their stupidity
Suddenly with a speed he hadn't expected of her, she appeared before him her hand raised. Before he could react she reached back and slapped him across the face as hard as she could. While she was too weak to do any damage to him, she had actually hit him with enough force to turn his head. She stood there panting in anger as he turned to fix his brilliant eyes on her. The hate she read there shocked her and she prepared to defend herself. But he simply turned and walked past her calling out over his shoulder. I will return in one hour. If you have not eaten by then, I will bind you and force you to submit. You can count on that. With that he shut the door and left her alone.
She cradled her hand and burst into tears. She couldn't believe she had struck him. But that was no longer the man she knew. He's a monster. And I am a fool. She slunk to the floor as he stopped outside her door listening to her sobs.
His resolve had weakened. He had wanted to hurt her and he had. But he found no solace in her pain. His chest began to ache with the familiar feeling of guilt. More overwhelming was the lust that had flared at her defiance. Perhaps we can still be together. I just have to remove the obstacles between us. When her friends are finally dead, she will have no one else to turn to but me. She will see that I am stronger than that trash shinigami she fancies so much. I will not allow her to give her heart to another. His new path visible in his mind he set out to put his plan in action.