There is no word for 'Hero' I: Blind in the Force
10.
Freefall to the Dark
"Why me, Master?"
"Because the force is strong in you, Constanz. Something great and dark rests inside you. And I will help you control it."
"Is that good, Master?"
"The darkness can provide you with great power at vital moments, my Padawan. I will teach you to use it without being consumed by it."
"Is it not dangerous?"
"That's why you must not use it casually."
Jedi-Master Torrat and young Constanz about the Force. Twelve years ago.
Lower corridors. Breakwater. Three hours after the attack of the clones.
Constanz was furious.
Not only because the Republic entered his realm without announcement, because they came with an army. An army of slaves, cloned from his Mandalore, bred to follow orders.
With all the strength he had left, Constanz struggled against the soldiers who were trying hard to pin him to the floor. Constanz screamed and screamed. He raged and raged even more.
In his head, Constanz didn't know what he was doing. He only knew that he needed to be free. Free to help the man he loved. The one man that had been punched down by the commander of the attacking troops.
He couldn't focus. He felt all the pain and fear in the Force and in himself. And he could still feel Mereel. His husband was so eager to come back to him, to prevent him from death, he stood his ground against all those clones.
Constanz could still see his husband's eyes before him. Though Mereel chose an unfortunate robe today and almost vanished among the clones, Constant always knew where he husband was. He remembered Mereel. His face, his screams and above all, his fear-widened eyes. Eyes, which were longing for him, calling for him.
Constanz called upon the Force. And now, she obeyed. He reached out and all six clones on top of him flew against the wall with the impact of an explosion. Within the Force, the King felt those who didn't wear those bulky armour slowly drift away. Sensing death was never easy, but Constanz had learned to live with it a long time ago.
The moment he was free, Constanz stretched out his hands and opened his palms. He called for his weapons and felt the crystals in his lightsaber respond. They whirred through the air until they reached their destiny, where they could again be the tool of destruction.
Again, the corridor was filled by blue shimmering light as Constanz ignited both of them. He saw his own blade reflected in the clones' helmets and felt the power those swords granted him with. He felt the anger overtook him. He didn't care how close to the dark side he was right now. He only wanted the Force to obey him. He wanted her power, the power he needed to save Mereel.
With a scream on his lips, Constanz leapt for the clone with the red markings. The Captain dodged his first strike rather skilfully. The Moment Constanz landed on the floor, he felt multiple blaster-bolts hitting his upper leg. His knee buckled and Constanz again found himself on the floor. He felt pain everywhere. In his skull, his shoulders, his rips, sides and now even his leg. He hated being so vulnerable.
This was the worst situation for him to be in. He was alone in a corridor without escape. He was facing a company of clones with no support in sight. He was wounded and his strength at its end. The air here was filled with so many dust and ashes Constanz had difficulty to breathe.
But he mustn't give up. His surrender meant Mereel's death. His defeat meant the doom for his kingdom. He just had to cut through a few more clones, then the way to his husband would be free long enough for him to attempt a rescue. Constanz knew that he was already too wounded to keep on fighting. Jedi stamina or not, he wouldn't be able to go on like this forever.
But he would not leave Mereel to the will of the Force.
Constanz rose with a surge of Force. He felt the anger and let it go through him, directing it to his blade. He loved fighting, that was true. Constanz inhaled and felt all the fear and misery and doubt torturing his mind. As he exhaled, he let go of everything and gave away to rage.
He whirred and leapt again. Around him, slackened bodies fell to the floor and Constanz was at the centre of their agony. At this close range, it felt like being in the middle of hell. He raged and cherished being the eye of the storm. Nothing came close to him, nothing got through him. Not a single bolt, not a single strike. The bodies of the clone gave no resistant as his lightsaber cut through them. Their voices and screamed were inaudible but Constanz felt it. He drew on it and became stronger by the second.
An accurate shot hit his right blade and the impact of the bolt sent his lightsaber flying through the air. Constanz felt the pain in his hand and jerked his head around. The red painted Captain stood again, both blasters raised, aiming at him with deadly calm.
Rage filled Constanz' chest again. You again! You will pay for this. But not now, Mereel first!
Determinate not to leave Mereel behind, Constanz went on. This was the good thing about using two lightsabers. If one was lost, he still wasn't unarmed. And it was then as his eyes caught Mereel again.
Among the white, Mereel was the only one without a helmet. His husband hanging between two clones who were carrying him. If there weren't for the blood on his robe and face, his husband might look peaceful, as if he was only sleeping.
In this moment, a clone stepped in and blocked Constanz view, as if they knew what the King was up to. Constanz registered movements among the clones and realized that they were talking his husband away. Away from him. Maybe forever.
"No!" The king shouted. "Let go off him! Don't hurt him! He's innocent!"
His time was running out. He had to reach Mereel and he had to do it now. He knew that Mereel had been injured when the det went up. He had thrown Mereel against the clone in order to push him out the blast radius. But never had he thought that that move would separate him from his husband. Mereel was injured, he needed medical attention. Until Constanz cut through all the clones, it might be too late.
But he had to try. Constanz closed his eyes for split of a second and let go of his fear of the dark side. He let go of all fear and restraints. Within this moment, Constanz let the power of the dark side consume him and felt its fury went through his body. He jerked his eyes open and stretched out one hand.
As his will commanded, blue energy of lightning shot from his fingertips and caught the first trooper in his way. It felt powerful. A power Constanz had never used before but always knew that it was inside him. He always feared this kind of power, but his love for Mereel and his longing to be with him again broke every dam he ever built.
Constanz focused and sensed the agony inside the clone. He felt the heart of the clone as if it was in his palm. He felt it beating and becoming weaker. Constanz squeezed. When he released the clone, that man was cut from the force.
A dark growl escaped his throat and Constanz gave himself away to fury. He shot blue lightning into the line of troopers and their pain strengthened him. Constanz hadn't been in such a fight for many years. He had missed it. It had been even longer since he needed to Force so urgently.
He unleashed the chains of that monster inside him and felt its might. He felt everything. Every stone, every breath and every blaster bolt. The world seemed a thousand times slower now. Constanz saw their fire coming before they pulled the trigger. He saw the Captain approaching and slammed him against the wall by using the Force. But he couldn't feel Mereel. He had wasted too much time.
His hand reached out for the Force and caught the throat of the Clone-Captain. The man in red choked and flew towards him, carried by the Force.
The blaster shots around him stopped instantly. Not that the clones stopped firing, but because Constanz had created an invisible force field to block out any coming bolts.
The clone in his grip struggled even more and Constanz squeezed more. He was no amateur; he knew how much time he had before the Captain blacked out.
"Where is he?" Constanz roared at the Captain. "What do you want with him?"
He was so close to the clone now he could smell that man. A distinctive favour of blood, sweat, and ozone surrounded him. Curious. This Clone-Captain smelled like Mereel. And he felt like Mereel. Constanz could sense the dark storm of emotions gathered inside his man's mind, like he had sensed it in Mereel so often. Like his husband, his man seemed to be on the edge between icy-cold concentration and steam-hot fury.
"Who are you?" Constanz hissed.
He raised his hand with the lightsaber and moved only two fingers. He heard a hiss as his will found its way to the seal of the helmet. Constanz wanted to see this man's face. Jango Fett's face. He had never come across such things. Two individual that were so similar in the Force.
But as the Clone's helmet began to move, Constanz felt a cold burning pain in his neck. Strength suddenly left his bones and the Force which surrounded him so tightly before began to fade. Constanz couldn't breathe and released the clone when his mind was too weak. He felt his knees touch the ground and blood running down his plates.
He pressed his hand on the wound and found the reason for his sudden failure. A small knife stuck in his neck. He felt the warm blood pouring out and soak into his under-suite. He felt his muscles tremble and his heart started to beat heavier.
No! No! NO!
Constanz had been many live threatening situations before but never had he been this close to his death. Experiencing certain death was new to him. He tried to rise but felt the world whirling around him. The feature of the approaching clones began to blur and he had to fight to stay conscious.
He thought of Mereel and hot tears ran down his cheeks.
He hit the ground again, one hand still pressing on his wound. But he knew that it was too late. He had already lost too much blood. If he didn't get medical attention now, the great Constanz Pietas Acrimonia would fall after all.
"Mereel!" He gasped. His heart sank as he saw Mereel's face before him again. He wasn't afraid of death, because death would never reach him. The living force awaits everyone of us.
But as Constanz remembered that in the living force, he would never see Mereel again, grief darkened his being.
"Forgive me, My Love..." Constanz managed to whisper and then, the unbreakable darkness swallowed him alive.
I promise that this is not the end. :-) Coming next: Chapter 11. The taste of failuer
Thank you for reading and leave a comment. ;-) HeavenOnFire.