Hello, everyone! Hope you are all enjoying this holiday season. My gift to you is a brand-spanking new chapter. For anyone who is interested, I have also started writing two ficlets on V for Vendetta, so be sure to subscribe and watch out for those!
First, a few shout outs.
minjor: I loved your suggestion of the letters, but I already have the plot outlined, so I couldn't incorporate it as a major element. I did, however, manage to include it briefly in the latter portion of the chapter. Thanks for the lovely idea!
city bookworm: Your insights are very astute and in line with my interpretation of the Twilight universe. I'd love to hear any fanfic suggestions you may have come across.
PrincessAmberRayne: I have a similar anecdote. When I was in high school, a friend and I went to private school together. We were new, didn't really talk to anyone else, and had very pale skin, so apparently, we were called 'the Cullens' behind our backs. I'm jealous of you. I'd rather be part of the Volturi or a wolf pack.
Matthias Stormcrow: Thank you for taking the time to review each chapter! And you'll find out the answer to your question right now!
Everyone who cried during the last chapter, I definitely owe you all a Kleenex and a hug.
I hope you enjoy!
Bella plucked a blood red apple from a low branch and held it in the palm of her hand. She took a deep breath and relished the sweet smell in the fresh air that filled her lungs. It had been an unusually warm winter, which had meant an early harvest for most of the orchards in Washington. This trip had been a mix between a spontaneous decision and a longtime dream for Bella to go apple picking, but Jacob had jumped at the suggestion. He had entertained every whim of hers since she returned with him to Forks, as if some invisible hourglass limiting their time together had been flipped and Jacob was utilizing every second until the last grain of sand fell. Bella couldn't exactly blame him; she did have some knack for disappearing. But almost everyone had celebrated her return. The Quileute even had a small festival in La Push to welcome her.
Lights were strung up, a long table was filled to the edges with food, and a small band of the tribe's youth played music for a crowd. Bella didn't think she would ever attend a party so large in her honor. It was there that she was informed of Sam Uley and Embry Call's deaths during what the Quileute dubbed the 'Battle of United Blood.' Bella's safe return was seen as an ultimate victory for the late members of the former Uley pack, and the souls of the deceased could rest with honor. However, she noted that not everyone seemed to agree, and the darkened eyes of Leah Clearwater glared at her from a distance for most of the afternoon. Everyone had known of her longtime feelings for Sam, and her unbridled resentment towards Bella was almost visible in the air. For this reason, she tried to avoid Leah and stay close to Jacob through most of the party.
"So, they made you Chief Jacob after all, huh?" Bella teased as she watched a few children gleefully join the crowd dancing outside. Even the youngest members of the Quileute tribe seemed to have blood warm enough to withstand the chilly breeze of early spring in Washington.
"Being an Alpha doesn't make me a chief, Bells… but yeah, I'm a pretty important guy," Jacob laughed while puffing out his chest.
"Hell yeah! Black pack!" Quil Ateara chimed in while howling in unison with Seth Clearwater.
"Oh, please. More like the Brat pack," Bella scoffed, though she was impressed with the way Jacob had grown into a leader. When he walked into a room, he immediately commanded the attention, respect and even admiration of those around him. Quil and Seth were particularly devoted and often mimicked him in the way Jacob used to do around Sam. She suddenly felt a pang of guilt.
"So, Sam…" she started in a deliberately lowered voice.
"Sam saw Embry being taken down by a group of newborns and jumped in to save him. The rest of the pack arrived too late," Jacob said in an unwavering voice that was trying to guard an underlying sadness.
"Oh," Bella said in a quiet voice, suddenly feeling sick about being the guest of honor at a party remembering the deaths she inadvertently caused.
"Bella, look at me," Jacob said in a gentle voice, lifting her chin up. She looked to the ceiling to stunt any rebellious tears. "No one blames you for what happened. It's a cycle that has persisted for thousands of years. The Cold ones always come, and we always protect people when they do. It's a rare and great honor to fight on behalf of the innocent. According to Quileute tradition, Sam and Embry will be honored each year, while most people vanish from memory following the burial ceremonies. Speaking of which…"
Jacob looked outside to see a small crowd gathering down on the beach.
"Follow me."
She nodded and pulled on her jacket. The afternoon was settling into evening, and the sun had almost set completely, leaving the sky a gradient of orange, purple and dark blue. As the darkness was approaching the coast, Bella saw three small canoes resting in the sand. The first canoe was the largest and had intricate carvings on the sides painted with many different colors. When she could manage a closer inspection, she noticed the carvings depicted dozens of running wolves. Jacob pointed out one with dark black fur and golden eyes beside a grey one with black spots. Sam and Embry.
"This canoe commemorates all the spirit warriors who fought and died defending our land and our people. Sam and Embry are the latest additions to the Great Pack."
"And the other two?" Bella asked.
The two smaller canoes were filled to the brim with woodcarvings, fish, deer antlers, and other random objects varying from books to shoes.
"They are gifts for the Great Pack from members of the tribe. It is a gentle reminder for the Pack to accept their newest members from the people that Sam and Embry saved."
Bella went silent and looked at the canoes with a deep sense of respect. She watched as Jared Cameron and Paul Lahote pushed Sam and Embry's canoes into the water, a small candle placed in each lighting their journey into the sea. An older woman sang a song behind Bella in a language she did not understand, though she still felt the swell of emotions it was meant to evoke. Jacob saw how visibly touched Bella had been by the ceremony, and reached out through the growing darkness to gently grasp her hand. She was able to stifle a small sob when it combined with hers, his strength reminding her of her own.
"So. Here she is. Bella 'vampire-loving' Swan, come to pay her respects to the dead."
Bella and Jacob turned around to see an agitated Leah Clearwater glaring at the two.
"Leah, that's enough," Jacob growled. She normally knew better than to disrespect her Alpha in public, particularly on sensitive subjects, but from the look and smell of her disheveled appearance it seemed as though she had found a stray bottle of wine somewhere among the feast. Jared and Paul sensed the trouble about to ensue and shooed the crowd back to the party.
"How could you bring her here, Jacob? Why couldn't you just forget her and leave her with them?" Leah continued, with what sounded more like pain than anger in her voice.
"You're the only one that seems that have a problem with it," Jacob replied scornfully.
"Am I? I'm not sure Sam or Embry would like the see the girl who caused their deaths tarnishing their own memorial," Leah spat, the hate returning to her words.
"Sam and Embry loved Bella!" Jacob cried.
"No! Sam and Embry loved you, Jacob! But you obviously care more about that bitch than you ever cared about them."
Jacob's anger was reaching a boiling point, and the hair raised on her arms began to shift into fur.
"Jacob…" Bella tried to calm him, but Leah wouldn't let up.
"Maybe you don't even care they're dead. Now that they're gone, you get to be leader instead of Sam and no one wonders who Embry's father was. All you need to worry about now is forcing love out of the girl who gets your friends killed."
Leah had found the final straw. As Jacob lunged toward her, Bella witnessed him transform faster than she had ever seen it. Leah had also grown more skilled, and her transformation was nearly as fast. The two monstrously large wolves wrestled on the beach, snarling and shoving themselves into the icy water. Bella felt helpless as she watched the enraged wolves struggle to fight while not being pulled away by the growing waves.
"Jared! Paul!" she called out. The pair heard her pleas and came rushing down toward the water. They then transformed and tried desperately to keep Leah and Jacob from killing each other, drowning, or both. They managed to free Jacob from the water, who was having more difficulty swimming in the harsh current than the swift Leah. When they laid him on the beach, he shifted back into his human form, spewing mouthfuls of salt water and sand. Bella rushed to his side, and as he coughed and gasped ragged breathes, a guilty Leah following the others with her tail between her legs. When Jacob caught his breath, he glared at her.
"Go away! You're not my Beta, you're no longer a member of my pack! You're not even my friend! The only one who is not one of us is you!" he shouted angrily at her as Bella and the others watched.
Leah, even in wolf form, looked shocked. As the hurt sunk in, she let out a devastated whine before running off and disappearing into the night.
"Bella? You OK?"
Jacob had noticed how she had suddenly become very quiet, staring intently at the apple in her hands. She shook her head slightly and immediately feigned a smile.
"Yeah, I was just thinking," she replied.
"About what? How to eat that apple? You know, you're supposed to bite it, not have a staring contest with it," he teased.
She gave him a playful glare as she took a bite. The taste was a little bitter, the apple not yet ripe.
"It's Charlie's birthday next week, isn't it?" Jacob asked, his basket already overflowing with an assortment of candy red applies. His canine nose allowed him to detect the best without tasting them first.
"Yeah, but I have no idea what I'm going to get him," she admitted. Her father was even more attentive to Bella than Jacob, if that was possible, since she returned to Forks. He had asked for nothing, not an explanation of where she'd been or why she'd left, perhaps too unwilling to say the wrong thing and have her disappear again.
"I think you've already given him what he wanted the most," Jacob said softly, placing a hand on her shoulder and giving her a reassuring squeeze. He then picked up her basket and disappeared into the orchard to finish gathering apples.
Bella turned her attention to the apple in her palms, the pure white flesh where she sank her teeth was already beginning to brown and rot. Simply breaking the skin was enough to irreversibly change it forever. As she rubbed the glittering scar on her arm, she realized that she had left the human world long ago, even before Jacob promised to keep her in it.
~:-:~
Charlie's birthday was, as requested, very low-key. Only a handful of friends were invited to attend, including Jacob, Billy Black, and a few other cops from the precinct Bella vaguely recognized. Sue Clearwater, Charlie's longtime girlfriend, was still out shopping, struggling to find a gift just as Bella had no doubt. Seth had promised to come by later, but Leah had, unsurprisingly, declined to attend. There were no decorations, just a few small presents scattered on the table and the same black forest cake Billy brought from the bakery every year. The boys crowded around the couch, beers in hand, watching the baseball game. Bella smiled, amused by her father's commitment to predictability. Still, something felt amiss. It was a strange, empty feeling that had been growing inside her since she returned with Jacob a couple of months before. She recognized it from her first arrival in Forks as a teenager before she met Edward. A painful hole that spreads and numbs your whole soul, leaving you in a disoriented stupor. It was the distinct awareness of knowing you are in a place you do not belong. And it was becoming more and more difficult to ignore it.
Bella tried to participate in the chatter and festivities to the best of her abilities, but in every moment of silence, the nagging hole in her heart returned and left her restless. In a particularly long lull somewhere after the boys' third beer, Bella took the opportunity to abscond to the porch. She closed her eyes and filled her lungs with the crisp air tinged with the smell of pine trees. It reminded her of Edward, running through the woods with him. But it also reminded her of the Christmas tree Aro had arranged for the castle and decorating it with red tinsel. Of playing in the gardens with Jane and Tesorina. Of the gorgeous mahogany jewelry box Marcus gave to her on her birthday. As she let herself fall into the reverie of her memories, the ache in her chest began to subside.
"You're leaving again, aren't you?"
Bella was startled out of her daydream by the sudden appearance of her father by her side.
"What? No. No, of course not. I told you. I'm back."
Her father sighed and took a seat on the porch swing, patting the space beside him. Bella moved to sit beside her father, whose dark eyes always had a mysterious twinkle that was only outmatched by an aura of melancholy.
"You know, your mother and I used to sit outside like this. I'd play my guitar, and she'd think up lyrics to the songs we made together. For a little while, they were about us. But soon I noticed how her voice got sadder and sadder, her words a little more distant. She sang about finding a warmer place to live, a happier place. Eventually, she didn't sing anymore. She got real silent. And that's when she left."
Bella felt tightness in her chest as her father bared his pain to her.
"I was sad for a long time, you know. Sad that love wasn't enough. Sad that she needed to leave and take you with her. But after a long while, I realized that if she'd stayed, it would've killed her. And I'm glad she took you to her warmer place, because if she hadn't, you'd be stuck in a cold, wet place with a sad father."
His strength was fading as he struggled to cope with the secrets he'd hidden deep down for so many years. Bella could feel him begin to shake, and she reached out to take his hand. His eyes were shining with the tears he was fighting to restrain, and she looked back at him with as much fortitude and affection as her heart could share.
"Dad, I don't care what kind of place I'm in. No matter where I go in the world, you will always be my dad, and I will always be your Bells, and I will never stop loving you."
Her father nodded silently, putting his grief and his fears back in check, before pulling his daughter into an embrace. As Bella hugged her father, who had suffered so much at her expense, she realized it was time to give him his present.
Bella reached into her pocket and pulled out a miniature birthday card. She scribbled down her cell phone number and the address to the Volturi residence. Her father examined the note before folding it and securing it in the transparent, ID section of his wallet.
"I will call you every week and come home for every Thanksgiving. And if I don't, you know where to find me so you can drag me back to this horrible place."
They both shared a laugh before they let the silence return. Bella rested her head on her father's shoulder, slowly swaying on the swing and enjoying their last moment together. It was what he wanted the most.
~:-:~
"Bella, what's going on?"
Jacob's voice sounded more like an accusation than a question. He felt like she was forcing him to relive a nightmare after so many comfortable nights of peaceful dreaming.
Bella had thrown a few clothes and keepsakes she would need in her bag, but thought it would be best to travel light. Still, the room felt more barren with every piece she removed from it, and Jacob could already see her removing herself from the picture.
"I know I've said it too many times before… but I'm sorry, Jacob."
Even though they had both come to this point, or something that felt similar to it, many times in the past, it never ceased to catch them off guard. They never got used to the feeling of his anguish and her regret for causing it.
"Jacob… when I'm with you, I feel exhilaration and youth, I feel the blood in my veins. I will admit, it's like breath of fresh air. But… the longer I'm here, the more I realize how I don't belong here."
Jacob opened his mouth to speak, but she raised her hand and he was silent.
"You have a family here. You have a pack. You have a purpose. But my family, who are very much like my own pack, is my purpose. And they're in Volterra. They need me, and I need them."
Bella was surprised by the honesty of her confession, but figured if there were ever a time for the truth, that time would be now. But it didn't seem to console Jacob, who suddenly, despite his imposing stature, looked like a fearful child.
"Bella… I don't want you to die. I don't want you to be cold for eternity," he said with genuine love and concern. She stepped forward and cupped his cheek, the heat radiating from his skin almost too hot for her to touch.
"Jacob, you will always be the sun in my world. Your warmth will keep me warm; I'm counting on it. I've never done anything good enough to deserve you, and I know asking to let me go is a bigger favor than I've earned to request."
Jacob removed her hand from his cheek and held it in his own, giving it a small squeeze.
"And you're the moon, Bella. I keep howling and hoping you'll stay, but the sun and the moon never end up together, do they?" he asked in a heartbroken sigh.
She looked away and shook her head. It stung an old wound, but perhaps in a way that helped it heal.
"Alright, Bella. Alright," Jacob conceded reluctantly.
She let out a breath she hadn't fully realized she was holding in, reaching up and hugging him. He briefly returned the embrace before grabbing her arms and pulling her to face him and look him in the eye.
"But you're going to stay in touch," he commanded in a tone that asserted it was not an optional condition.
"Jacob, you're one of maybe three contacts in my cell phone. Who else am I going to call when I get bored?" Bella laughed.
Jacob smirked at her never-ending attempts at humor to ease tense situations. He gave her one more hug so tight that she wasn't sure if he was trying to make her stay by keeping her in place or knocking her out. But as he agreed, he let her go. When he finally headed for the door, Bella remembered something.
"Hey, I need you to do one last thing for me," she called out quickly.
Jacob turned and gave her a skeptical look.
"What is it?"
"I need you…" she started, weighing the gravity of her request, "I need you to forgive Leah."
"Bella…" he began to protest.
"She's in love with you!" she said suddenly to stop him mid-sentence. It worked, and he was shocked into silence. After a moment, he collected his words.
"How do you know?"
"Jacob, with all the love triangles I've been in, don't you think I'd be an expert in the subject by now?"
He laughed. She was spot on that time. He tensed his jaw for a moment before nodding.
"I'll talk to her."
"Thank you," she replied softly.
"Good-bye, Bella."
"Bye, Jacob."
And with that, he was gone.
~:-:~
It had been almost two months since Bella left, and somehow, the Volturi had not recovered full functionality. While the daily routines and obligations were met, they hardly spoke to one another otherwise. Each member of the Volturi struggled to cope with the loss to their coven, whether it was through anger, mourning, trying to forget. Aro seemed to exhibit the worst symptoms of all three, and as they combined, he regressed into a state of cold abandon without his characteristic curiosity.
As the Aro, Caius and Marcus headed to the council chambers, the first time they had appeared together since Bella's departure, Aro walked the fastest and with the greatest sense of urgency.
"Look at Aro," Caius muttered. "So eager to begin yet another mundane day."
Aro stopped in his tracks to turn and scowl at Caius, his eyes glittering with a rage that was not entirely directed at him, before continuing on and leaving the pair behind him without saying a word. Caius had taken a step back, still surprised that no amount of cajoling could return him at the very least to his state of mind in the years before Bella had joined them, but it was of no use. Aro was irreparable.
"What a pity. Just as he was beginning to develop a sense of humor," Caius retorted to Aro's cold shoulder.
"I believe we are still waiting on yours," Marcus returned without missing a beat.
The two comrades chuckled but came to the grim realization that something as pleasant and simple as a laugh felt foreign without Bella's comforting presence.
"How long do you think this will go on?" Caius asked, making a wistful glance towards the main chamber.
Marcus thought on the somber question for a moment before coming to an internal decision.
"Won't you wait here a moment? There are matters I need to discuss with Aro in private," Marcus requested.
Caius might have protested, but considering the volatile situation and maybe even his faith in his old friend's wisdom, he acquiesced and stood outside the door while Marcus entered the chamber. As he opened the doors, Marcus passed a visibly upset pair of twins, who were clutching envelopes in their hands. Jane and Alec had tried to convince Aro to let them mail their letters to Bella, but he had refused to hear their appeals. It seemed they were unsuccessful yet again.
Inside the main chamber, Aro was inspecting three newborn soldiers, chained and muzzled, that he intended to incorporate into the newly invigorated Volturi guard. They were all large and formidable in their own right, but the startling red color of their eyes shone with a pure bloodlust that was brazenly malicious.
"Aro…"
"Three new recruits," he replied inattentively. "Pulled them from their cells from the maximum security prison in Germany. The first, 185 centimeters in height…"
"Aro," Marcus said a little more insistently, only to continue to be ignored.
"Dark complexion, special ability, still undetermined…"
"I told the wolf."
Aro froze.
There was a cold silence in the air for a few moments before he finally turned to face Marcus with a distorted look settled somewhere between anger and accusation.
"You did what?" he hissed.
"I was the one who told the wolf that Bella was alive," Marcus responded, unflinching and completely calm.
Aro fought back the urge to fly into a rage. He clenched his jaw, fangs pressed tight against his lower canines, and balled his fists until his knuckles turned white. When he released the tension by punching one of the newborns square in the chest, he did so with such force that it knocked the unsuspecting vampire into the other two and sent them collectively careening across the room. As she lowered his arm, the realization came over him.
"Because of what happened to Didyme?" he asked in a flat tone.
Marcus was silent, and in a moment of surprising vulnerability, his stoic expression surrendered to a deep and profound look of regret.
"No… It's true. I never forgave you for what happened to Didyme. That pointless war you and that heartless woman waged at the expense of my wife's life made me hate you. For a very long time. I waited for my opportunity to avenge her. I waited patiently for centuries. And then, it came in the form of that innocent girl, who became the woman who breathed life into our long dead hearts. She was our pulse. But I knew we had nothing but a fate worse than death to offer her in return, and I would rather take our pulse away than hers. So I wrote a letter to the wolf. But I didn't do it to hurt you as much as I did it to save her."
The silence descended between them again. The fury that had welled up in Aro's chest subsided into a throb of remorse. He turned away from Marcus and replied in a low, weary voice.
"Only now do I fully comprehend the depths of the way my actions hurt you, Marcus. The pain of losing someone you love, someone who loved you. I will never be able to atone. But I accept this punishment, whether it was your intention or not. It's what Bella and I both deserve."
Marcus nodded and turned to leave, hardly wanting to inspect the new and now bruised newborns. As he opened the doors, he faltered in the doorway. He didn't need to touch him to understand the ache in Aro's heart. Before Marcus left, he said one last thing to Aro over his shoulder.
"I forgive you."
Please remember to review! Let's see if we can get to 200 before I conclude it!