Hidden Paths on a CloudCast Night

by roku kyu

An apocalyptic threat to two worlds reunites old friends and enemies...and lovers parted for ten years. Ch. 17. "Keep your friends close...and your enemies closer."

10. Chasms and bridges

Disclaimer: The characters from Fushigi Yuugi are the creations and property of Yuu Watase and related enterprises. I do not own them and do not make any profit from this fiction other than my enjoyment in spending time with them.

However, the plotline for this story and all original characters DO belong to me and may not be used elsewhere without my permission.

Special Note: Due to the increased action throughout the ShiJinTenChiSho, Earth, and certain otherworldly sites, some chapters (such as this one) will have location headings to let you know exactly where the action is taking place. Think of it as jumping from scene to scene in a movie - which is exactly the way this story plays through my mind.

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Chapter 10. Chasms and bridges

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The Imperial Palace in Eiyou

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The tall golden roofs of the Imperial Palace rose majestically over the bustling city below. From a distance, one would think that one was observing the luxurious accommodations of a powerful ruler, overlooking a wealthy and prosperous capital city. However, upon closer inspection one saw that the market stalls held sparse amounts of goods, haggled over by a populace with drawn, weary faces. Above, the palace gates stood firm and strong, yet the scarlet paint flaking from the ironwork bore mute testimony to privation and neglect.

Suzaku no Shichiseishi Nuriko stood examining the gates with violet eyes widened in shock. Although Taiitsukun had warned him of the trials of post-war Konan, her words did not prepare him for the emotional wrench he felt upon witnessing with his own eyes the decline of the once-proud Imperial City. He glanced at his companion, expecting her expression to be equally, if not more, appalled than his…but Hotohori kept her eyes downcast, concealing her thoughts behind her veil and lowered lashes.

Nurilo felt a surge of unreasonable irritation with his companion. Nine days of travel across some of the roughest country in Konan, and still he felt as distant from Hotohori as the day they were transformed. Never once had she opened up to him about any of her doubts, fears or troubles, despite his gentle forays into conversation with her. She had replied to his queries as briefly as possible while remaining polite, all the while maintaining her air of distant introspection. Well, he had had just about enough of her mysterious airs, and if she didn't snap out of it in the next day or so, she could expect to become the recipient of a good, hard shake from her one-time concubine!

That thought and its attendant musings on the radical changes in their roles gave Nuriko a very familiar headache. He turned his increasingly bad temper on the palace gates, banging against the bars with the hilt of his sword. "Ho, Imperial Guard!" he shouted, angry at the lax security.

The metallic hiss of drawn swords clued him into his mistake. Four members of the Imperial Guard stood before him as if they had materialized out of thin air, their blades drawn and ready. Nuriko glanced at subtle movement in the trees around the gate and realized that he and Hotohori were in the target sights of at least four archers. The swift and silent appearance of the guard provoked strange memories from his last life: the deadly stealth of a group of mountain bandits, a red-haired bandit swinging down through the trees and snatching him up… Nuriko pushed those thoughts out of his mind and sheathed his sword, recognizing that his rash actions had placed Hotohori in peril of being killed by his own guard. He held up his hands in a placating gesture…but it was Hotohori's velvet tones that rang out before Nuriko could release his indrawn breath.

"We don't wish for any trouble. We beg your patience, as we are strangers here." Hotohori lifted one elegant hand and dropped the veil that concealed her features. If he hadn't been so concerned for Hotohori's safety, Nuriko might have laughed at the rapid change in expressions of the scowling guards. Their eyes widened in surprise and appreciation of the beauty who stood before them. Only the Captain of the Guard, an older man from the look of him, retained his scowl--but it had changed to a scowl of confusion as he blinked his eyes in disbelief.

Hotohori continued smoothly through the shocked silence. "I am a distant relative of the Imperial family, and I have traveled far to request an audience with the Dowager Empress. Would you be so kind as to carry a message to the Empress, begging her indulgence on my behalf?" Three of the younger guards nearly fell over in their eagerness to serve the mysterious woman, but the Captain snarled out a command, freezing them in their tracks.

The Captain stalked up to the gate. "We serve the Emperor Reizeitei and the Dowager Empress Houki, not strangers with impertinent requests! We received no instructions to expect guests arriving at the palace gates."

Hotohori met the Captain's suspicious glare with calm and limpid eyes. "We do not claim that the Empress expects us; however, our business with her is urgent and important." An undercurrent of iron surfaced in her velvet tones. "There is no breach in protocol nor in palace security in the carrying of an urgent message; however, the refusal to allow the Imperial family access to friends and allies who bring critical news may be considered an obstruction to the best interests of Konan!"

The Captain blinked and stepped back, unconsciously yielding to the command in the young woman's voice. In fact, the sudden change in her demeanor from polite supplicant to steely authoritarian irresistibly reminded the Captain of the late emperor. There was no doubt that this young woman was related to that promising but tragic legendary figure, especially when one took into account the obvious family resemblance. He cleared his throat. "My apologies, Lady. I did not mean to be an obstruction to any important information intended for the Royal Family. I myself will carry your message to the Dowager Empress."

Nuriko glanced at Hotohori, sensing her sudden hesitation. He turned and walked to his horse, returning with a tablet and a charcoal crayon. "Here," he said, scribbling a single line, followed by the kanji for 'willow.' "Take this to Hou…, er, Her Highness. We will wait here for her reply." He offered the tablet to the Captain, bowing politely. As the man cantered off, Nuriko returned to Hotohori's side, resigning himself to a long wait.

However, it was less than twenty minutes before the Captain galloped back into sight, out of breath and obviously agitated. "The Empress will see you at once!"

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Nuriko waited before the intricately carved doors to the throne room, feeling his heart beat rapidly in his throat. He glanced over at Hotohori, wondering if she was half as nervous as he. Her features were concealed behind her veil once again, but the slight trembling in her hands gave her away. Well, he had very little sympathy for her. This whole thing was her idea, and for the hundredth time in the last few hours, Nuriko wished that they had never come to Eiyou. He was overcome with the desire to bolt screaming out of the palace while he still had the chance.

To distract himself from panic-generated random thoughts, Nuriko tried to focus on the details of their surroundings. The corridors were as airy and light-filled as ever, spotlessly clean and well-kept, but there were obvious empty places where once rich tapestries or jade statuary had resided. The entire palace exuded the tenuous feeling of a beloved domicile of a noble family that had fallen on hard times.

Long before either of them was ready, the doors swung open, and Imperial guards took their places along the aisle leading up to the jade throne. As they walked forward, Nuriko looked anywhere but at the throne, noting that instead of a complete wall of soldiers leading up to the dais, there now stood only eight or ten guardsmen. Before he knew it, their progress was halted at the foot of the wide dais.

Nuriko finally lifted his eyes to the slight figure leaning forward in the throne, dwarfed by all of the intricate decoration surrounding her. She was tinier than he remembered, delicate and fragile, her once blooming complexion paled by strain, her enormous eyes marked by dark circles beneath and tiny lines radiating from the corners. Yet somehow she seemed even more beautiful than before, the character lines in her face lending her countenance a heartbreaking poignancy. How could any man look upon her and not want to hold her, comfort her, swear his undying fealty to her?

His love for her must have shone from his eyes as he finally met her gaze, for her own eyes filled with tears. To the complete shock of the Imperial Guard, the Dowager Empress flew off the throne and flung herself into the arms of the stranger.

"I knew it was you!" she sobbed. "I wasn't certain, even after reading your note…but I knew that I had to see for myself! And no sooner had I seen you walking toward me than I knew! You always gave yourself away by that walk, didn't you know? Even in your dresses, you would become angry or forgetful, and suddenly you would be striding forward like a man with a mission!"

Nuriko held her, stunned by the outpouring of emotion washing over him. She had been his best friend so many years ago, but he had had no idea of how much he had meant to her until this moment.

Houki continued to cling to him as if he would disappear if she loosened her grip for even a moment. "I don't know how this happened or why; I only thank the gods that you're back! I've missed you so much, Nuriko! I've needed you so much…and I never had the chance to tell you goodbye!"

She was crying bitterly now, almost losing control before the anxious glances of the guards. Nuriko knew that he had to calm her and help her regain her balance--before completely shattering it with the shocking revelation that stood quietly to one side observing them.

"Shhhh, Houki-chan, don't cry, Funny Face. Why should you tell me goodbye when I've only just arrived?" He saw her smile weakly through her tears at his old nicknames for her; names that no one, not even Hotohori, knew.

She gulped in a breath of air and smiled up at him. "So you're here to stay? You won't leave me again?"

Nuriko felt a stab of guilt at his earlier ardent wish to stay far away from her and the Imperial City. He glanced up, only to see some of the guards staring openly, while others looked away discreetly. He flushed; Houki obviously didn't understand the sort of impression she was giving to her own guard by her desperate clinging to a young man who was a complete stranger to them.

He caught her shoulders gently, pushing her back and murmuring in her ear, "Houki, can we have some privacy for a moment?"

She blinked and looked around, blushing red as she saw the averted eyes of the guard. "Of course! Guard, you are dismissed!"

The Lieutenant of the Guard stepped forward hesitantly. "Heika, may I respectfully request to remain in the throne room? I will step back to the perimeter…"

"Thank you, but there is no need, Lieutenant. This is my trusted friend of many years, and you need not fear for my safety, since the Minister will remain here as well."

At that moment, a soberly robed man raised a hand and acknowledged the guard from his position in an alcove near the throne, where he had stood unseen by the guests. The guard turned and exited upon his unspoken command. The advisor's kind face was familiar, although more deeply lined than Nuriko remembered it, and his salt-and-pepper hair and beard were now more salt than pepper.

"Lord Ashida!" exclaimed Hotohori involuntarily, breaking her long silence and bringing the attention of both Houki and Ashida to fix on her. She blushed and lowered her eyes, concealing their striking--and familiar--hue.

Lord Ashida narrowed his eyes and examined the veiled woman, his keen eyes studying what details he could discern. "You know me, Lady?"

"Yes," Hotohori replied faintly.

Nuriko realized that he could no longer put off the time for all revelations. "Houki-chan…Lord Ashida…I wish that our only purpose in contacting you was for a joyful reunion, but as you've probably deduced from the fact that I'm here at all, I've brought news of serious developments. These dark tidings are not only for Konan but for every country of the ShiJinTenChiSho."

Lord Ashida's eyes flashed. "So I feared from the time I first glimpsed you, Nuriko-sama. Yet before we continue, let me say how very good it is to see you again! Whatever darkness threatens us, I for one am happy that we have one of the most powerful warriors of the Suzaku Seven standing once more in our defense! However, if you will not take offense, may I say that you have…changed from how I last remembered you."

"Yes, I've changed; I'm not the miraculous embodiment of the late Chou Ryuuen--I'm a new person with Nuriko's reincarnate soul. I have all of the memories and abilities of Suzaku no Nuriko…but I'm a different man, it's true." Nuriko surprised himself with the insights that had just come tumbling out of his mouth. Where did this knowledge come from? Did Taiitsukun place it in his head, or could they be the innate perceptions of his new incarnation?

Houki flushed and looked uncertain, obviously wondering who exactly she had been hugging just a few moments ago. Nuriko felt a pang at her sudden distance from him, knowing that the worst was yet to come.

"How did this come about?" Lord Ashida went straight to the point, as usual.

Nuriko explained about the attacks on the seishi children and the subsequent measures that Taiitsukun and the gods had been forced into enacting as a last resort. Houki and Lord Ashida had already known of the attacks on the Seiryuu children from Tasuki and Chichiri's mission, so news of the shadow beasts did not shock them. However, Houki, obviously bursting with curiosity, kept her eyes fixed on the enigmatic figure of the veiled woman. Finally she interrupted Nuriko.

"Do I understand that all of the reincarnate seishi were aged to adulthood?"

"Young adulthood, yes, with the exception of the Seiryuu twins and, of course, the missing Seiryuu children."

"Were any souls left at Mount Taikyoku…or were all of the seishi souls reincarnated?"

Nuriko had seen this question burning in Houki's eyes. "No souls were left behind; we had all been born into new bodies."

"So who is this you have brought with you, Nuriko?" Houki's voice was trembling with emotion.

Nuriko paused, unsure of how to handle this moment…but Hotohori took matters into her own hands, dropping her veil and lifting dark gold eyes to meet Houki's questioning gaze.

Lord Ashida nearly buckled at the knees from shock, but a radiant smile burst from Houki's features as she darted across the floor and flung herself into Hotohori's arms. "Heika!" she cried joyfully, grasping desperately at the beloved figure, holding the slender form close to her own, subconsciously noting that her lord was now shorter, slighter…softer…

Houki pulled back confused, examining the features of the person in her arms. She took in the blooming countenance, the full, curved lips--

"Heika!" she choked, feeling her grip on reality recede as the ground beneath her feet seemed to crumble away into nothingness.

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Nuriko paced anxiously before the closed door of the Dowager Empress' private quarters. Although Houki had regained consciousness shortly after Nuriko had caught her from Hotohori's arms, Lord Ashida had insisted that she undergo a complete examination by the palace physicians. The minister had handled the situation with his usual aplomb, gesturing to Hotohori to re-veil and taking the Empress into his own arms before sending Nuriko to call the guard.

Houki had exerted her will as well, agreeing to see the palace doctors on the condition that the news of her collapse be kept from the young emperor. "He has enough to occupy his thoughts, with his lessons and all. I don't wish him to worry about his mother's foolishness!" So the deal was struck, and now Nuriko and Hotohori waited by royal command to be re-admitted into Houki's presence.

Hotohori had said nothing from the time of Houki's collapse, but her eyes were dark and troubled. Nuriko felt guilty and at the same time impatient with Hotohori. Damn it, didn't she ever have anything to say? She had never been this aloof in her last life! At this point in his jumbled thoughts, the door swung open, and Lord Ashida stepped out to escort them into the Empress' presence.

Houki sat in a brocaded chair by the open window, apparently enjoying the cool evening breeze. She waved the hovering physicians out of the room, her countenance pale but composed. Nuriko and Hotohori approached and bowed deeply, touching their foreheads to the ground.

"Please rise--don't bow like that to me, either of you!" Houki's voice held an agitated edge.

Nuriko and Hotohori hastened to obey. Nuriko met Houki's gaze, his own eyes dark with anxiety. "Heika," he began but changed when she closed her eyes as if in pain, "I mean, Houki…I'm worried about you."

"Nuriko…" she breathed, keeping her eyes closed--and his name was like a prayer on her lips. "When I hear your voice, it's almost as if everything has gone back in time, as if my best friend still stood before me…" she paused and opened her eyes, "…but when I look at you--both of you--I know that things will never be the same."

A lump rose in Nuriko's throat. "I still care about you, Houki. Nothing will ever change that."

Finally she smiled at him, but it was the world-weary smile of a woman who had seen much and believed little. Nuriko felt as if he were staring at her across a wide chasm, a chasm neither of them knew how to bridge.

"Houki; Little Bird…what did the doctors say?"

Nuriko stared in shock at hearing Hotohori address Houki so familiarly--but why shouldn't she? Hadn't they been spouses…lovers in her last life? And why was that thought as sharp as a werewolf's claw in his breast?

Houki, however, responded to the beloved voice, pushing back her weariness and sorrow to force a smile. "I'm fine. You needn't worry, Heika. The doctors tell me that I'm working too hard, but then again, you know what that's like."

Hotohori laughed, her voice deep and rich. "Ah yes, I do remember!" She moved toward Houki and knelt beside her chair, taking the Empress' hand in her own. "But, Little Bird, I'm 'Heika' no longer. Not a drop of royal blood runs in these veins, I'm afraid." She squeezed Houki's hand while giving her a conspiratorial smile.

Houki's mood seemed to lighten. "No accident of birth can change your intrinsic nobility. But what am I to call you? What is your given name?"

"Shoda Saito…but you may call me 'Sai.'"

Houki gave a genuine laugh. Nuriko stood stunned, both by Hotohori's sudden loquacity and the easy camaraderie that had sprung up between the two women. One would never guess that they had a painful dilemma before them. And how did he end up being the one on the outside looking in? 'Because that's all you've ever been,' whispered some bitter, jealous voice inside his head, a voice that refused to be shrugged away.

Houki and Hotohori had gone on with their conversation during Nuriko's dark musings, sharing news of the palace doings and the struggles to bring Konan back to its former prosperity. Finally the conversation came back to the obvious.

"So, how are you, Hei…Sai? This must be difficult for you. One wonders if the gods laugh at us at times."

Hotohori shrugged. "I'm as new as a baby chick in this body, so it's early days yet. There are times when the past rises up and confuses me…but perhaps that happens to all of us who hold memories of another life. Is that true, Nuriko?"

Nuriko jumped, startled at being brought into the conversation and even more startled by Hotohori exchanging more than three words with him. He snorted, half in amusement, half in…something else. "Confusing doesn't begin to describe it. And yes, Houki, I, too, wonder if we exist for the amusement of our gods."

Hotohori's voice grew soft and contemplative. "Yet we are alive by their grace. I can endure my god's laughter if I believe that He weeps for me as well."

There was a moment of silence, then Hotohori spoke again. "Houki, how is our…how is Boushin?"

Houki's eyes gleamed with maternal pride. "He is a truly amazing person, Sai! He has this vein of seriousness, this air of introspection…then suddenly, out of nowhere, he will pull the most outrageous prank, just to prove that he has a sense of humor! Yet he takes the role of emperor seriously; too seriously at times. I urge him to run and play and make friends, for the times that he can act like a child are growing short and far-between."

Hotohori smiled softly at her. "I always knew that you would be a wonderful mother."

Once again, Nuriko battled back the feelings of bitter jealousy. This was ludicrous, to be envious of a warm friendship between two women--yet he knew that he was seeing the vestiges of the profound love between a once-married couple, the deep bond between two people who had created a new life between them. It was a level of intimacy that he had never known in his past life...and might never know in this life. He swallowed hard, wishing for some way that he might excuse himself from their presence, leaving them to talk and laugh and share without him bearing reluctant witness.

Once again, his introspection had caused him to lose the thread of conversation between Hotohori and Houki. The next thing he knew, they were making arrangements for Hotohori to meet with Boushin the next day, incognito of course.

Houki waved a finger in mock warning. "And since the young emperor is nearly ten years old, he no longer wishes to be addressed by his 'baby name' and prefers to be called Reizeitei, his Imperial name."

Hotohori laughed. "Emperor Reizeitei it is! Now I will ask Lord Ashida to escort me to my quarters, for I believe that you two wish some time alone to catch up with one another. Oyasumi nasai!" With a swift turn, she exited the chambers before Nuriko had a chance to protest.

A heavy silence fell between the once-close friends. Nuriko felt that the situation was hovering between absurd and tragic and began to speak--exactly at the same time as Houki. They laughed self-consciously, begged the other to start, and ended up talking over one another again. An uncomfortable silence took over once more.

Nuriko squared his shoulders and took the plunge. "What Hotohori said about past life memories was absolutely correct; it can be confusing, even overwhelming. The worst thing about knowing what you had…is knowing what you've lost." He raised his eyes to Houki's. "Back in the throne room, I thought that we could have it all again, but now I know that I've changed too much to expect you to... But I still miss you, Funny Face."

Tears spilled out of Houki's eyes at the beloved nickname, a mocking reference to the startling resemblance between the two former Imperial concubines. Houki leaned forward and caught Nuriko's hand, drawing it to her cheek. "I missed you as well, Nuri-ko-rin! Your last letter--I received your last letter a few days after we learned…it broke my heart! There was so much that I wanted to tell you, so much that I needed to share with you…and I thought that I had lost you forever!"

The words poured out of her in a torrent, fast and breathless, as if Nuriko were a ghost who would disappear at the moon's rising. "You were so happy in that letter--and so sad. You had given up on Hotohori-sama and entrusted him to my care, and I could tell behind your cheerful words that the decision had hurt you. Yet you went on focusing on what was good in your life; your love for Miaka and for your brother seishi. Receiving that letter was like receiving your blessing and your strength from beyond the grave. I wanted so much to have the chance to thank you--but I knew I never would!" She was crying openly now, the sobs wracking her slight form.

Nuriko gathered her into his arms, marveling at her fragility. Had he ever been so slight himself? "Hush, Funny Face, you're talking nonsense! Didn't you thank me just now? After today, how can you not believe in second chances?" He stroked her long violet locks, so like his own, until she grew quiet.

Finally she spoke, her voice hushed and serious. "You're right, of course, Nuri-ko-rin…but like all gifts from the gods, there is more to second chances than meets the eye. Today, I received back both my friend and my husband, and yet possess neither. For my husband is now a woman with no room for me in her life, and my friend…I hurt my friend, and in return saw his eyes fix on me with anger and dislike." She lifted her head from where it rested against Nuriko's chest, her gaze both earnest and sad. "Had I known that you and I and Hotohori-sama would all be reunited in this life, I would never have taken your place at his side!"

Nuriko stared back, dumbstruck. A flush of shame stole into his cheeks. "Never say that, Houki-chan! And never let my foolishness make you say such things. Would you deny Konan her present Emperor out of fear of my jealous glances? It was envy that you saw in my eyes, not dislike! You know what a jealous creature I've always been; don't you remember how I tortured Miaka when we first met? I even kissed Tamahome to get at her!"

Houki giggled at last; the memories of Nuriko's bold stratagems to dispose of all rivals for Hotohori's affections made them both laugh. However, Houki soon returned to sober reflection. "It's a curious thing that you envy me, Nuriko. Ever since this afternoon--I've envied you."

"Me? Whatever for?"

"Did you hear Hotohori-sama's name for me? Little Bird? That was our private joke, referring to his feeling of being a bird trapped in the gilded cage of royalty. I was his companion bird, willingly walking into the trap to share his life. The funny thing is that I no sooner walked into the cage than he escaped, leaving me behind. So here I remain, singing for the masses, never showing weakness or doubt, doing my best to hold the bars apart so that my child may enjoy what days of freedom he has left. Hotohori-sama was trapped by duty--but I am trapped by love. So as I watch you prepare to leave with the one you love, free of the expectations placed upon royalty…I am envious."

Nuriko gathered her close in his arms once again. "What foolish creatures we are," he whispered into her hair. "Envying each other when we should simply love one another. What I envied was your close relationship with Hotohori. Since we've been reincarnated, she speaks to me only when necessary. I feel further removed from her than when I was sequestered in the concubine quarters in my last life. I only wish that I was free of these damn memories, so that she wouldn't have the power to hurt me any longer!" He stopped, appalled at his own outburst.

Houki, however, took it in stride. "The willingness to be hurt is the willingness to be loved. Don't blame her, Nuriko; she must be very confused right now. At least you know who you are, while I suspect that she is just beginning to find out. Have faith--and try to keep in mind what the word 'soulmate' truly means."

With that, Houki gently extricated herself from his embrace, led him to the door and warmly wished him goodnight.

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The next morning found Hotohori and Nuriko once more waiting nervously for an audience with royalty, but this time they were in the Shrine of Suzaku, standing before the display of the weapons and artifacts of the deceased shichiseishi. Mitsukake's bottle of healing water sat dim and translucent beside Chiriko's ornate scroll. Nuriko traced a loving finger across the surface of the heavy gold bracelets whose transformation into gauntlets of superhuman strength could only be effected by himself or the Suzaku no Miko. Above all gleamed the Holy Sword of Suzaku, unsheathed above its scabbard, last wielded by Hotohori's spirit in the final battle against Nakago.

Light footsteps slapped against the marble tiles, and both Suzaku warriors wheeled around to face the imposing frown of…an unbelievably beautiful boy of nearly ten years in age. He wore richly embroidered robes, complemented by dark hair tightly drawn up and concealed beneath a small boxlike crown. A throng of soldiers, advisors and tutors hovered at the door of the shrine but were obviously under orders to wait outside. Nuriko and Hotohori both dropped down into deep, respectful bows before the young Emperor.

"Please rise." The boy's words were stiffly formal, but his dark gold eyes gleamed with interest. "The Empress has told me of your visit, and I am honored to meet you at last." He gave a short and regal bow, enough to show respect to petitioners of less-than-royal rank. One prune-faced gentleman nodded in satisfaction from the doorway, his robes and rank designating him as the tutor for Royal Protocol.

Emperor Reizeitei turned and gave the same polite bow to the crowd at the doorway. "Thank you for your kind escort; you may all return to the main palace as I meet with my guests in private. Good day."

A swell of murmured protests rose from the assembled guards and tutors. Reizeitei crossed his arms and cocked one perfect eyebrow at them, the arrogant expression almost humorous on his rounded, childish face. There was nothing humorous, however, in his steely tones. "I said, Good Day!"

At that, the crowd dispersed quickly, as ordered. Reizeitei turned to his guests and sighed. "I thought that they would never leave!" The arrogance left his demeanor, and he gazed eagerly at them. "So are you really Celestial Warrior Nuriko?! And his companion? I've heard so much about you! Can you tell me stories about the battles you were in? Are you really strong enough to lift an entire block of stone?" His gaze focused on the veiled woman. "And what did you do in the Kutou War? Do you have any special powers?"

Hotohori looked overwhelmed at the barrage of questions, not to mention the fact that Reizeitei, although he bore a striking physical resemblance to his father, seemed to completely lack the polite aloofness of the lonely young boy. Nuriko tried to interject a reply while being dragged by one hand around the temple.

"See, here's the Holy Sword of Suzaku that belonged to my father! I'm not supposed to touch it, but Tasuki-san--you remember him, he was one of your brother warriors---Tasuki-san says that it's all a load of shit, and I can play with the goddamn sword since it belongs to me by right, as long as Suzaku doesn't strike me dead when I try to pick it up! Oh, and Tasuki-san says that I'm not supposed to say 'shit' and 'goddamn' and one other word I can't remember, because it's the secret language of bandits, and emperors have to earn the right to use them!"

Hotohori raised her hands to her temples in despair at the unforeseen influence of the foul-mouthed bandit in the Imperial household.

Nuriko bit his lip to keep from laughing. "So do you see a lot of Tasuki-san?"

Reizeitei looked sad for a moment. "Not nearly enough. He and Chichiri-sama used to visit a lot, but nowadays they're always gone on secret missions. But when they were here, Chichiri-sama would teach me the legends of Suzaku and some really sugoi magic tricks, and Tasuki-san would teach me to ride horses and shoot!"

"Ride horses and shoot…what?" asked Hotohori faintly.

"Mostly straw dummies dressed up as the Seiryuu Seven. Tasuki-san especially liked to shoot arrows into the biggest dummy that had bright yellow straw on top like hair. He said that if I hoped to kill the Seiryuu bastards, I had to learn to keep my ass on the horse. The Imperial Riding Master didn't want to push me to learn too fast, but Tasuki-san said that if I fell off the horse while it was galloping, he would kick my ass back on it till I got it right! He said that he wasn't going to let me become a sissy boy like my father!"

Nuriko choked, concealing his hilarity in a fit of coughing, while Hotohori fixed the boy with a look of outrage. "Your father was never a sissy-boy! I knew him personally, and…and he was a respectable warrior!"

"Yes, I know, Tasuki-san said the same thing. He said that my father was one of the best warriors he ever knew, and an honorable man to boot! He just called him a sissy-boy because he was always looking in the mirror. Tasuki-san said that if he caught me looking in the mirror more than once a day, he was gonna whip my behind, and I could spend the rest of the day looking at my red ass!" Reizeitei paused a moment, frowning. "I think that 'ass' might be one of those bandit words that emperors aren't allowed to use."

"It most certainly is!" expostulated Hotohori, her eyes bright with anger.

Nuriko turned suddenly and covered his mouth, not wanting to further infuriate Hotohori by laughing out loud…but caught Reizeitei surreptitiously examining Hotohori with a keen, critical eye. Nuriko glanced away quickly, swearing under his breath. That sneaky little shit! Pretending to be an innocent boy fecklessly repeating the bandit language used by Tasuki, all the while deliberately seeking to shock his guests and gauge their reactions! He should have remembered Houki's words last night about her son's propensity for pranks.

He decided to take charge of the situation before Reizeitei provoked Hotohori into an apoplexy. "Heika," he asked casually, "have you ever heard Tasuki-san use any of those bandit words in the presence of your mother?"

Reizeitei broke off his examination of Hotohori to focus on Nuriko. He tapped his chin in deep thought. "No…no, I haven't."

"That's because despite his bandit ways, Tasuki-san is a gentleman, and he would never use such rude language in the presence of a genuine lady."

Reizeitei flushed at the rebuke, betraying his understanding of the coarseness of the "secret language." He met Nuriko's keen gaze and nodded slightly, acknowledging Nuriko's perceptiveness and abandoning his attempts to shock Hotohori.

"My apologies, my Lady. I am sorry for my rudeness, and I humbly beg your forgiveness."

Hotohori looked even more shocked at the change in Reizeitei, from chattering boy to well-mannered noble. She waved one hand uncertainly. "There was no offense meant and so none taken."

Reizeitei pressed the point. "Please, my Lady, I can't rest until I know that you have forgiven me. I need to feel that I am worthy of your trust. Perhaps worthy enough for you to unveil for me?"

Nuriko swore silently to himself again. Reizeitei was formidable in his single-mindedness. He was determined to uncover the mystery of the Lady in the shrine, and he was willing to use every weapon, including shock, charm, and Imperial rank, to get his own way. Nuriko could only be thankful that Houki, Tasuki, and Chichiri had been around to instill strong moral values in the boy; otherwise, his formidable intellect and perceptiveness could make him into a manipulator who could eclipse the machinations of Nakago.

Hotohori, however, could not resist the winsome charm in her son's voice. She unveiled slowly, and a beaming smile appeared on Reizeitei's face. His eyes, however, did not lose their intent focus.

"You are very beautiful, my Lady. You honor my home with your presence." Something suddenly caught in the boy's voice, and Nuriko thought that he saw Reizeitei gazing at Hotohori with genuine longing. Hotohori blushed in pleasure, completely won over by the admiration in her son's eyes.

Reizeitei, too, seemed captivated by her and for once, Nuriko could not discern anything but sincerity in the boy's manner. "Would you honor me with your name?"

"Shoda Saito…but please call me Sai."

"Sai," repeated Reizeitei dreamily. "A fitting name for…" He suddenly cut off whatever it was he was going to say. "I mean, it suits you."

"Thank you, Heika."

"No, please call me Reizeitei--or, if you would like, Boushin."

Nuriko startled, staring at the open countenance of the Emperor. Could he possibly know--but how?

Hotohori, however, smiled openly. "Boushin…yes, I like that name as well. It reminds me of someone…" she broke off.

Reizeitei leaned toward her, his slight body taut with tension. "Someone?" he prompted.

Hotohori met his gaze directly. "Someone I loved."

"And do you love him still, Lady?" The boy's voice trembled with suppressed emotion.

"I will love him as long as my soul exists on this plane or any other."

There was a moment of profound silence--a silence in which three people struggled with their emotions as they blinked back tears. Nuriko realized that he and Hotohori were perilously close to breaking their promise not to reveal Hotohori's true identity. Yet, as his heart ached from watching the struggle of parent and child to reach out to one another, he wondered if they were doing the right thing in keeping the secret. Reizeitei seemed strong enough to handle the confusing issues with Hotohori's metamorphosis. However, the decision was not his to make, and they had given their word of honor to their dear friend.

Nuriko jumped in to steer them away from these perilous waters, at the same time supporting Hotohori in her obvious desire to learn more about her son. "So, Heika--I mean, Boushin--tell me what your life is like. Are you happy?"

Boushin looked up, blinking rapidly, and shot a wryly adult smile at Nuriko. "Well, I'm Emperor. I do my lessons, try to learn about my country and how to govern her, hear petitioners, meet with advisors, and practice my swordsmanship and other martial arts. My days are very full."

Hotohori drew close to Boushin and lay a gentle hand on his shoulder. "But do you have fun? Do you have...friends?"

Boushin smiled up at her. "Oh, yes, Mother insists upon it! She says that at least half of each day must be spent doing only what I wish to do, and one day per week is mine alone, free from any Imperial responsibilities. I have three good friends, two of them the grandchildren of Lord Ashida and one an orphan boy that Tasuki-san found and brought to work in the stables. We have the most marvelous adventures, all on the palace grounds, of course. I also have Chichiri-sama, who has taught me to fish and how to find the truth within myself by meditating, and Tasuki-san, who has taught me to climb trees and set ambushes. As I said, my days are very full."

"I'm glad. Oh, I'm so glad to hear that!" Without thinking, Hotohori scooped Boushin into her arms for a brief embrace. He did not pull away as boys his age were wont to do, but leaned his head against her for a moment, closing his eyes as he savored the moment.

Nuriko hovered near them, once again the outside observer to familial warmth. He looked away to grant them privacy and to swallow the lump in his throat. Suddenly he felt his hand caught by another's, and he looked to see Hotohori smiling at him as she embraced her son. 'Arigatou,' she mouthed silently and gave his hand a brief squeeze. Nuriko flushed, feeling overcome with emotion.

"Boushin," Hotohori murmured to her son while keeping her eyes fixed on Nuriko. "Of all the things that fill your life, friends are the most important. Friends and family. Never forget that."

/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/

It was less than two hours later that Houki, Reizeitei and Lord Ashida gathered on the steps of the Imperial Palace to wish Nuriko and his companion Saito safe passage to Kutou.

Reizeitei walked up to Hotohori, holding out the Holy Sword of Suzaku across both hands. "Please accept my father's sword and my best wishes for your success." The words were formal, but the smile on his face was very warm.

Hotohori bowed deeply. "You honor me with this gift. I will strive to be worthy of it." She tested the weight of the sword in her slender hands--then suddenly withdrew it swiftly from the scabbard, the steel singing from the rapid motion. She held it high, letting it catch the light of the noonday sun, shining like a beacon across the palace grounds…then quickly and gracefully resheathed it.

Reizeitei stared in admiration. "There are none more worthy than you to wield it, my Lady."

Hotohori bowed deeply again. Houki suddenly moved swiftly toward them, grasping their wrists, her hands closing awkwardly around Nuriko's bracelets. "Please, Nuriko, Sai---let me send some Imperial troops with you. I fear for your safety in Kutou!"

Nuriko squeezed her hand while Hotohori shook her head. "We are presenting ourselves as ambassadors, peaceful emissaries to help stabilize the Kutou government. A contingent of foreign soldiers would only threaten them, Little Bird." She smiled reassuringly. "You needn't worry. After all, Nuriko will be beside me, and what more protection do I need?"

Nuriko flushed at Hotohori's confidence in him. He wasn't sure what had brought about this change, but he didn't intend to question it.

After a few final embraces, the two Suzaku warriors mounted their horses and galloped out of the Imperial courtyard. Houki shielded her eyes to watch them go. "Yes, you have Nuriko now," she murmured softly to herself, "and he's all you've ever needed." She looked away, letting go of the jealousy, determined to think of them with love, as Nuriko had said.

Lord Ashida turned to follow the Empress but paused as he realized that Reizeitei still stood staring after the travelers. "Heika, are you coming?"

"In a moment." Reizeitei watched the figures until they disappeared around a bend in the road. "Good-bye…" he said very softly, "…Chichi-ue."

/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/

The Steppes of Northern Hokkan

-

Miaka woke suddenly, her attention caught by a soft, arrhythmic clicking sound. She stared up into the murky blackness of the night, noting that it wasn't very late, since the moon hadn't risen yet. She realized that their fire had died down into embers while they slept. Usually Tasuki would wake first and feed the fire, but for some reason, he remained huddled in his blankets on the far side of the glowing embers. A sense of wrongness suddenly rushed through her, snapping her wide awake, causing her to push hastily out of her bedroll. She darted over to check on Tasuki, grasping him by one shoulder. He was shivering violently, his eyes still closed but his teeth chattering, producing the clicking sound that had awoken her. She shook him hard, alarmed at the fact that he wasn't waking.

He opened his eyes slowly, blinking in confusion at her. "M-miki-ch-chan," he said hoarsely, "Wh-what's w-wrong?!"

"You are!" She anxiously placed a hand on his forehead. "You're sick!"

"N-no!" he tried to reassure her. "J-jus'…a little c-cold."

Miaka frowned. He wasn't burning from fever; in fact, his forehead was chill and damp. Suddenly she thrust a hand beneath his blankets, catching one of his hands that he had curled into his chest. "You're more than just cold! You're freezing!"

She darted off, grabbing up the small stockpile of branches he had cut for them earlier that night and flinging them onto the embers. She fanned the embers frantically but produced only a few small flickers of flame. The fire was taking its own time in rekindling. Frustrated, she darted back to Tasuki's side.

"Th-thanks, Miki-chan. Sh-shoulda done th-that myself."

"Hush!" She fixed him with an awful frown. "Why didn't you tell me you were getting sick? All you said was that we should turn in early tonight!"

"N-not S-SICK!" he insisted. "J-jus' tired…an' a little cold." He tried to produce a fangy grin, but his chattering teeth ruined the effect. "F-fine now! J-jus' g-go back ta s-sleep!"

"Oh, no!" Miaka crouched beside him, thrusting a hand inside his blankets again.

"H-hey!" Tasuki protested weakly. "S-stop g-gettin' fresh with m-me."

She ignored him, feeling along his shoulder, back, and legs. "Just as I thought! You're an ice cube!" Throwing back his blankets, she crawled in beside him, then pulled the blankets over them. She grabbed his hands and drew them into her stomach, then caught his frozen feet between her calves.

"M-miki-chan! S-stop it! I'm f-fine!"

"Shut up! I have no intention of letting you freeze to death!"

"N-not gonna d-die!" he argued, yet he couldn't help sinking into her warmth, feeling it soothe his aching limbs. He struggled one last time. "Plus this…is w-weird!"

"No, it's not. It's no different than what you did for me several days ago." She looked into his eyes, her nose nearly touching his--and flashed a grin. "Besides, we're brothers, Genrou, don't you remember?"

"Smartass," he mumbled…but the campfire had rekindled at last, wafting warmth through the air, combining with the warmth that cradled him, sending him into a deep and dreamless sleep.

/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/

Miaka pushed out of the bundle of blankets and stretched, blinking the early sunlight out of her eyes and looking around for Tasuki. He was standing just a few meters away, rifling through Makaze's saddle bags. His expression was dark with concern as he failed to find whatever it was he was looking for. Finally he stepped back, running a hand through his hair in frustration.

"What's wrong, Genrou?"

Tasuki startled, then assumed a cheerful grin as he met Miaka's eyes. "Up so soon, Miki-chan? Man, the way you were snorin,' I thought you'd be out for another hour."

"I don't snore, and you can stop trying to distract me. Answer the question, please!" She tilted her chin up toward him defiantly, her hands on her hips.

He laughed in genuine amusement. "Okay, okay, don' go kickin' my ass or nothin'! I'm jus' tryin' ta figure out how much food we got left."

"And?"

"And we got enough for three, maybe four days, if we're careful." Tasuki sighed. "I usually don't second-guess myself, but I wonder if I did the right thing takin' us so far off the main road. I expected ta run inta a lot more nomads or traders by now, but except for that one guy we got the blankets from ten days ago, we ain't seen anybody. Must be this fuckin' cold spring makin' everybody start out late this year."

Miaka blinked as she remembered the night. "That's right! Genrou, how do you feel today?"

He smirked back at her. "Fine. I toldja I wasn't sick! I jus' get a little cold up here in th' North. I'm a Southern boy, ya know," he drawled, laying on a thick accent.

Miaka giggled at his joke, making Tasuki grin in return. He turned and pulled his shirt over his head, talking casually over his shoulder. "Let's go over ta that stream we found last night and get clean."

Miaka stared at the ribs protruding from his sides and back. She didn't remember him looking so thin when they had first started traveling.

"Hey, Miki-chan!" Suddenly he was beside her, knocking on her skull. "Anybody home?"

"Sorry!" She flushed bright red. "Uh, I'll be right behind you. I just have to get some things from the saddle."

"Okay, but if ya don't answer my calls, I'm comin' back ta getcha, an' then I'm gonna turn you over my knee for dawdling!" He turned and strolled into the trees.

Miaka darted up to Makaze, giving him an absent pat before rifling through the saddle bags. She pulled out the small leather bags of their supplies of grain and rice. She weighed each bag in her hand, frowning, then began searching around for more bags. Nothing. She opened the small bags and peered inside. What did Tasuki mean by saying that there were enough rations for the next three or four days?! As far as she could tell, they had barely enough for two days, even if they went short.

If they went short. But…there was enough food here for three or four days--for one person. One person.

Miaka's eyes went wide in shock. It couldn't be…he wouldn't…!

"Hey, Miki-chan, I'm warnin' ya!"

"Coming!" She scrabbled around for her personal supplies and darted up the path, her mind piecing together little incidents from the past two weeks.

Tasuki gave her a light and affectionate cuff as she skidded into sight. They settled into their routine of taking turns, granting each other privacy while calling and answering. Miaka struggled to keep to the routine while her mind churned with conflicting thoughts.

Her distraction continued through the day's travel, making her answer Tasuki's remarks just a beat too slow. She tried to remember the last time that she had seen Tasuki eat anything. Was it that night one week ago when he had caught the rabbit? She remembered him laughing at her for wolfing down most of the rabbit after having tearfully rebuked him for killing it. Did she ever see him chewing on the hard grain that served as her breakfast each day? Her dreadful suspicion became a firm conviction. The rations…his increasing weariness…his inability to keep warm at night--he was starving himself! He was starving so that she wouldn't have to go short on food!

"An' then I said, well, sure it's great that I can sprout wings and fly, but do th' goddamn wings gotta be purple? An' Kouji, he says, shut th' fuck up, Genrou, it's better'n pink any day!"

"What?!" Miaka stared at Tasuki's back in confusion. "What are you talking about, Genrou?!"

He snorted. "Oh, guess ya suddenly started listenin' again. I wondered how fuckin' stupid a story I hadda tell until ya caught on. So what's th' big interestin' problem that's got ya all caught up today?"

Miaka flushed, glad that she was sitting at his back. She wanted to cringe in humiliation at her thoughtlessness, her complete self-absorption that made her content to accept anything he gave her without bothering to see if he had what he needed. She swallowed hard, trying to repress the quiver in her voice. "I…I…" Inspiration suddenly hit, saving her. "I want to be the one to cook tonight!"

Tasuki jerked on the reins in surprise, making Makaze snort angrily. "Sorry, 'Kaze," he muttered before turning around to stare at Miaka. "Uh, Miki-chan, why all of a sudden…?"

"I feel like I need to contribute to our mission. I just want to help out!"

Tasuki turned forward again, staring into the setting sun. His back was tight with tension. Makaze snorted, planted his feet and lowered his head, indicating that he was finished with traveling for the day. Tasuki swung Miaka down before dismounting.

"So…is it all right if I do the cooking?"

Tasuki glanced away shiftily. "Uh, Miki-chan, how 'bout if you collect the branches, an' I…?"

"What's wrong?" Miaka said impatiently. "Why won't you let me…?" She stopped as a thought occurred to her. "Er, Genrou, did I ever cook for you in the past?"

He nodded, apparently finding his boots fascinating.

"So was it that bad?"

Tasuki nodded again…but lifted his head and grinned at her. "Worst fuckin' food I ever had in my LIFE! Ya damn near wiped out the Suzaku Seishi with that one meal!"

Miaka couldn't help giggling along with him. "But…but I've gotten better!" She giggled again at his frankly skeptical look. "I'm not lying, Genrou! Yui made me practice over and over again at college. My mother really worked hard with me as well. I can at least make a simple rice dish!"

Tasuki shook his head and sighed. "All right. Guess it's possible ya got better--ya sure couldn't get any worse!"

"Thanks for the vote of confidence," pouted Miaka…but inside, she was secretly triumphant. Tonight was her chance to repay him for all of the sacrifices he had made for her on this journey--and she would make sure that it was a meal he would never forget!

/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/

Miaka stirred the boiling pot of rice carefully, as Yui had taught her. She tasted a small sip of the rice water and made a face--there was nothing wrong with it; it was just bland and tasteless. How she wished she had some of the curry leaves that her mother often used! Either those, or even a small leek or mushrooms… Seized by another burst of inspiration, she ran toward the trees that surrounded their campsite. She dug through the small lingering patches of snow; perhaps there were some early mushrooms growing on the dead wood scattered along the forest floor.

She dug in another patch beneath a dormant, bare-branched tree--and sucked in her breath in triumph as she spotted some small elliptical objects buried in the snow. Chestnuts!

"Hey, Miaka, how long do I gotta stay out here? Makaze's not th' greatest conversation maker, if ya know what I mean!"

"Just ten more minutes!" Miaka called up into the trees beyond the campsite, where she had banished Tasuki as she prepared his "surprise." She gathered up the few chestnuts she'd uncovered and raced back to the campfire, hastily lifting the lid and stirring the rice once more. Another thought struck her. Tasuki's meals had always tasted fine; perhaps he had some curry leaves or other spices in the saddle bags. She ran over to the saddle bags resting near their bedrolls and searched carefully through each one. After pushing Tasuki's bottle of hair dye to one side, she discovered a small silk bag. Opening it, she was delighted to see some dried leaves and roots. She was certain that it had to be the spices that Tasuki had used in seasoning their other meals.

Miaka returned to the fire with her prizes and began shucking the chestnuts. After cutting them up with a dagger, she added them along with the dried leaves to the rice pot. She stirred the mix, removing the pot from the fire and letting the lid hold in the steam. Lifting the lid after five minutes, she took a tiny sip of the scant remaining rice water. It was perfect--the chestnuts gave a slight sweetness to the rice while the dried leaves formed a spicy counterpoint. "It's ready!" she called up into the woods.

Tasuki appeared within a minute, his expression a comical mix of trepidation and anticipation. He sniffed the air cautiously. "Smells pretty good, Miki…but how come there's only one bowl?"

Miaka dragged him by the hand and pushed him down onto a tree stump near the fire. "It's because you're the only one eating. It's your turn tonight, Genrou--since it was my turn the last ten nights!"

Tasuki flushed guiltily. "Nah, what're ya talkin' about, Miki? I've eaten plenty…"

"When? What did you eat?"

"Ummm, errrr…there was that one rabbit…"

"I remember that--you had maybe one leg! And that was over a week ago!" Miaka lowered her voice. "Look, you can't lie to me now that I've finally caught onto you. I really appreciate how you've taken care of me, Genrou, but it won't kill me to miss one meal. I'm really worried about you, and if you won't eat this, I might just…." She stifled a little sob.

"All right, all right, I'll eat it already! Jus' don' cry!" Tasuki lifted his full bowl and took a small amount in his chopsticks. Smiling nervously, he placed it in his mouth--and his eyes widened in surprise. "Hey, this ain't bad. In fact, it's pretty good!"

"You don't have to sound so surprised!" Miaka scolded, but she couldn't help grinning in triumph.

Tasuki began to eat a little faster; he tried to restrain himself, but Miaka knew that he had several days of hunger beneath his belt. Finally he took a breath and placed the nearly empty bowl by the fire. "That was great, Miki, thanks! I haven't had such a good meal in ages."

Miaka clapped her hands in delight. "I hoped that you would like it! I wanted to surprise you!"

"You didn't use up all the rice, didja?"

"No, we still have at least another day's worth. But I couldn't let you go hungry any longer."

Tasuki shook his head. "It's gettin' harder and harder to get anythin' past ya, Miki-chan. When didja get so smart?" Miaka blushed in pleasure at his compliment as Tasuki continued. "Since yer gettin' so damn smart, I figure that I'd better tell you 'bout my surprise. When I was wanderin' around up there, I found a hot spring…." His voice suddenly caught in his throat.

Miaka crowed in pleasure. "A hot spring? Where?"

But Tasuki was staring at her with a strange expression on his face. "Miki--hand me th' canteen, wouldja?" he said breathlessly.

She hastily passed the small canteen to him, watching anxiously as he took a big gulp of water. He lowered the canteen, and Miaka saw beads of sweat appearing on his brow. "What's wrong…?"

Before she could finish her sentence, he jumped up and darted behind the trees. To her horror, she heard him choking and retching violently. "Genrou--Genrou, what's happening?!" she cried stupidly.

"Stay back!" he rasped before succumbing to another bout of retching. Finally he grew quiet and reappeared from behind the trees, his countenance pale and strained.

Miaka ran up to him, leading him back to the fire. "Sit down, I'll make you some tea!"

He shook his head. "Listen, Miki, I gotta ask ya--was there anythin' that looked wrong about that rice? Was it gettin' slimy or anythin'?"

"No--no, it was still dry and perfect!" Miaka turned a stricken look on Tasuki. "But…but maybe the chestnuts were bad. They looked good, but they had been frozen under the snow…"

Tasuki turned a horrified look on Miaka. "What chestnuts? Where didja get 'em?!"

Miaka led him to the tree beneath which she had found the chestnuts. Tasuki stared at the tree a moment and picked up a broken chestnut shell. "Oh, goddamnit," he cursed softly. "T'Ien Shih Li!"

"T'Ien Shih Li? What's that?"

"Hokkan horse chestnut. Used as an emetic--ya know, ta empty your stomach in case of poisoning. Oh shit!" He darted back into the trees for another bout of retching. When he finally reappeared, he was paler than before, and Miaka was near tears.

"Genrou--Genrou, I'm sorry! I didn't know!"

"I know, Miki, but listen up, 'cause this is important! Never, never put anythin' in your food unless you know exactly what it is! Thank Suzaku that it was me instead of you who ate…" Suddenly he bent over, clutching at his abdomen in agony. "Miaka!" he gasped, abandoning her nickname. "Didja put anythin' else in th' food? DID YOU?!"

"Only a few of the spices you had in the saddle bag!" sobbed Miaka, beginning to panic.

"I didn't have any spices! Are ya talkin' 'bout the leaves in th' bag with the hair dye?!"

"Yes!"

"Oh, goddamn fucking HELL!" Tasuki cursed into the ebony sky. "Goddamn Han Lian Cao!"

"Is it poison?!"

"Not that bad, but... It's what I use for the hair dye--but it's also a goddamn purgative!" He clawed at his abdomen. "Listen, Mi-chan, grab your stuff and get th' hell outta here. No question and answer--just GO!"

"I won't leave you, Tasuki!"

"Yes you will, 'cause in about sixty seconds, I'm gonna be good for nothin' but a target for predators! Take Makaze an' get th' hell outta here! I'll find ya…when I'm over this." Tasuki put his free hand on a tree to support himself, bowing his head to hide his grimaces of pain.

"What if you don't get over this? What if you need help?"

Tasuki lifted his head and glared at her through reddened eyes. "You can't help me, so get outta here! If for some reason, I don't make it…I got gold hidden in the lining of my coat, so take it and Makaze and GO!" He roared in frustration at her stubborn refusal to move. "For Suzaku's sake, Miaka, leave me with at least a shred of dignity, will ya? GET OUT!"

Miaka stumbled back, shocked at the desperate rage on his face. Makaze suddenly shouldered past him, trotting up to Miaka and nudging her with his nose. She crawled up onto his back, hearing Tasuki shout, "Hyah!" Makaze took off, cantering swiftly away from the campsite as Tasuki stumbled back through the trees.

Miaka clung to Makaze's mane as he found his way back out onto the open plain that bordered the copse of trees. Finally he stopped, and Miaka slid out of the saddle, collapsing onto the ground in a miserable heap. "Everything I do…" she sobbed, "everything I do turns into a disaster! I'm so stupid, I hate myself! I wish I was dead!" Makaze lowered his head and nosed her gently as if to comfort her. "No, don't do that, Makaze! I don't deserve it! I probably killed your master!"

The big horse snorted and shook his mane vigorously, then nosed her again and whickered softly. Miaka smiled at him through her tears. "I swear that you can talk, 'Kaze! You're saying that he's a lot tougher than that, right?" She reached out and wrapped her arms around his huge head. "Oh, I hope that you're right! I'd give anything to have him come walking out of those trees screaming and cursing at me!"

The full moon rose higher in the sky, casting its light in a silvery swathe across the wide plains, shining on the giant shadowed horse that stood protectively over the small figure huddled at its feet. Miaka shivered suddenly and blinked, realizing that she had dozed off while brooding. She checked the position of the moon, estimating that at least two hours had passed. Tasuki hadn't shown up yet--but then again, she had no idea of how long he would suffer from the effects of the purgative and emetic drugs. She forced back the weak tears and rose to her feet, determination gleaming in her eyes.

"Come on, Makaze, we're going back!"

The big horse shook his mane again and snorted.

"I don't care what he said! I have to check up on him!" Miaka began striding back toward the dark mass of trees, but Makaze moved, placing his solid bulk in her way. Irritated, she veered around him, but he also turned with her, and before she knew it, she was walking back the way she had come.

Miaka placed her hands on her hips. "You may think you're stubborn, but you've never come up against me before! I can show you a thing or two about stubborn!"

For the next fifteen minutes, the two duellists played their game of advance and retreat, feint and dodge. Finally Miaka collapsed on the ground exhausted, noting dully that she had advanced only twenty meters back toward the copse. Still no sign of Tasuki, either. The thought of his suffering and possible death overwhelmed her, and despite her best efforts, the useless tears began again.

"I don't want to hurt him or embarrass him," she sobbed. "I just want to help! Even just a little… Can't you understand that, Makaze? You seem to understand almost everything else."

The big horse pawed the ground uncertainly before approaching her and placing his velvet muzzle in her hair. He whoofed out a gentle breath, making her shiver from the warmth trickling down her neck. Suddenly he jerked up his head, his ears pricking forward. His nostrils flared, and he took a few hesitant steps toward the copse--then wheeled around, dancing over the ground impatiently while tossing his head at Miaka.

"Trouble!" she said breathlessly and ran up to him, pulling herself clumsily onto his back. As soon as she gained her seat, Makaze took off at a rapid canter back toward the trees. Soon they were slaloming between the trees, Miaka ducking low on his back to avoid the branches that whipped back from their passage. He pulled up short at their campsite, and Miaka slid off his back. A subtle movement caught her eye, and she noticed a dark form slinking around the edges of the area, lifting glowing eyes toward the new arrivals.

"Wolf!" Miaka gasped, remembering Tasuki's comment about becoming a target for predators. The scent of sickness must have brought the creature out from its lair, hoping for an easy kill. The canine hesitated a moment upon seeing Miaka--then Makaze let out an infuriated squeal, charging toward the skulking form. He crashed through the underbrush, hooves striking out at the creature. Miaka heard a yelp, followed by receding yips as the animal took off into the safety of the night.

"Tasuki!" shrieked Miaka, frantic for his safety. She ran through the trees but found nothing but the lingering scent of sickness. "Tasuki, TASUKI!" she cried, going almost mad with terror for him. A dark shape appeared before her, blocking the faint rays of moonlight filtering through the trees. It was Makaze again, snorting and pawing the ground before her. She remounted and clutched at his mane. "Find him! Find him, Makaze, please!"

Makaze took off at a sedate trot, carefully winding his way between the trees. Miaka almost screamed with frustration at his meandering pace--it was so slow compared to his earlier charge toward the campsite! They progressed further into the copse, the ground gently rising and showing the rocky bones of the foothills which lay just to the east. Mist drifted over the ground, giving the place an eerie atmosphere. Miaka realized that she had fallen silent, unconsciously adjusting to the mysterious feel of the surroundings. She squinted at the thickening mist ahead, roiling in twisting and ghostly shapes. Suddenly Makaze halted, and Miaka focused on a shape in the mists, looking like a man's upper body draped over a rock…

"TASUKI!" she screamed, diving off Makaze's back and rushing toward the shape. She thought that the shape moved--but by that time, she had tripped and fallen into the spring hidden by the thick twisting mists. She surfaced in a panic, spitting out hot water and choking, as something shoved her against the rock. She clung to the rock, drawing in deep breaths, finally focusing on the figure in the mists beside her. It was Tasuki, dripping wet and furious.

"Goddamnit, Miaka, do ya hafta scream yer fool head off all th' time?! I was dozin' in th' spring, an' yer shriekin' woulda scared the shit outta me, if I had any left, which I don't! What th' fuck are ya doin' here, anyway?!"

"I thought the wolf killed you! I thought you were dead!"

"Wolf? There ain't no wolves around here!"

"Yes, there are! Makaze just drove one off from the campsite!"

Tasuki shook his head and laughed. "That wasn't a wolf. That was a goddamn stray dog, probably lost from one of the nomadic tribes. Pain in the ass skulker, but chickenshit as hell--kept runnin' off if I pitched a few rocks at it."

"Oh." Miaka pushed her dripping bangs out of her eyes and looked around. The steam rising from the spring was so thick that Makaze was only a vague dark shape standing on the bank. "I guess this is the hot spring."

"Good one, Mi-chan--don't let nobody tell ya that yer slow!" Tasuki smirked above her. His face was pale in the moonlight and a little drawn, but he looked much better than the last time she saw him. "Came in here ta get warmed up, 'cause I was shiverin' like a sonuvabitch…but I never expected ya ta come tumblin' in on top of me! I tell ya, Mi-chan, it's official now!" He grinned at her. "Outta all the shichiseishi that ever existed, I hold the record for the most times a seishi nearly died at th' hands of his priestess! Ain't nobody else ever gonna beat me out!"

Miaka tried to grin back at him, but her smile crumpled, and she ended up sobbing into her hands. "So then, I guess," she hiccuped, "I hold the record for being the worst, most stupid and thoughtless priestess that ever…."

She felt herself pulled into a wet and slippery embrace. "Aww, c'mon, Mi-chan, I was makin' a joke! C'mon, knock off th' tears already! It was an accident--you were tryin' ta do somethin' nice for me, that's all!"

His kindness made her heart ache worse; she wished that he would rail and shout at her, so that she wouldn't feel so guilty. She buried her face in the smooth skin of his chest, wrapping her arms around his neck and weeping bitterly with the release of all of her fears, reliving her terror that she had lost him.

He patted her back awkwardly, trying to calm her. "Anyway, Mi-chan, you're jus' plain wrong ta call yerself thoughtless. You're one of the few people in this world who thinks about me at all. Most people don't care whether I live or die--and some would rather I died! Maybe I've taken a few lumps 'cause of you, but ya never did it outta bein' thoughtless! Ya always worried 'bout me, and," his voice dropped, becoming soft, "I always appreciated that."

Miaka quieted in his gentle embrace, her heart beating in wonder at his tenderness toward her. However, that wasn't the only reason her heart was racing. She felt his skin beneath her cheek and fingers, smooth against her…as far as she could feel. She suddenly felt a flush of heat move up through her body, a flush that she couldn't blame on the hot spring. Was it embarrassment, or…? "Tasuki! I did it again, didn't I? I, uh, walked in on you again when you weren't, er, wearing anything…." Her voice trailed off into an embarrassed mumble.

Tasuki snorted with laughter. "Fell in on me is more like it! But, yeah, Mi-chan, I don't generally go in hot springs with my pants on. Don' worry, though--hell, after tonight, I figure I got no secrets from you anyway! It'd be kinda stupid for me ta put on an air of wounded dignity, when I ain't got any left."

"Yes, you do! I don't think any worse of you, especially since all of your suffering is my fault! In any case, you're the one who said that we're only human. I've been sick to my stomach plenty of times myself, you know!" She lifted her chin, forcing herself to meet his gaze without embarrassment.

He laughed again at her defiant demeanor. "I don't doubt it, th' way ya usta wolf down everythin' in sight! But thanks anyway, Mi-chan. Hey," his voice dropped into a low growl, "if ya wanna make it up ta me, there is somethin' you could do right now…"

In spite of the steam surrounding her, Miaka felt her throat go dry. "What?"

Tasuki lifted his arms and pointed down his back. "I got this sore spot behind my right shoulder blade that I can't reach. If you could work it out for me…."

"Oh, of course!" She moved around behind him, feeling along the triangulation of his trapezius, following along the curve of his shoulder blade until she felt the slight lump of tensed muscle. She dug her fingers into the knot, working it firmly as she tried to coax his muscles to relax. He sighed in pleasure and let his head droop forward until he began coughing from the steam.

Miaka grasped his wet ponytail and pulled his head back until it rested against her left shoulder. "Here, just lean against me until I'm done." He relaxed against her, giving in to his weariness and the bliss of her massaging fingers.

Miaka concentrated on his shoulder blade, working the knotted muscle until it began to yield to her firm ministrations. Tasuki floated gently against her, his eyes closed and his expression blissfully at peace. Suddenly a torrent of images crashed through her mind: she and Tasuki together like this in warm water, his head against her shoulder as she caressed him; his face younger, more rounded; Tasuki grabbing her and kissing her, both of them wrapped in towels…

She couldn't hold back any longer; she had to know! "Tasuki! Were we ever lovers?"

He jumped violently, spinning and fixing her with a shocked look just as his rapid twisting motion caused him to slip, crashing under the surface of the water. He came up sputtering and cursing. "Goddamnit, Miaka, I'm beginnin' ta think that ya are tryin' ta kill me!"

"Sorry, sorry!" She tried to explain. "It's just that I don't remember anything from when we first met, and sometimes I get these…strange images in my mind…more like memories, I think…and…." Miaka trailed off, miserably embarrassed, not noticing that Tasuki looked stricken for a moment before regaining control.

"Nah, Mi-chan, listen. Sometimes things might seem one way, but they get twisted up in your head, an' they're not…" he stumbled over the words awkwardly.

"So we weren't…?"

"No!" he interrupted, surprising her with his vehemence. "You didn't…you never felt…it wasn't like that between us! I was just a friend to you; we were just good friends." He stopped, his expression dark and closed.

His words reverberated in her mind, joined by another ghostly memory, a voice murmuring, 'Just a good friend--and that's all you'll ever be.' Who said that? Was it her…or him? What did these memories mean? Had they ever tried…? Did he reject her, or did she reject him? She knew by the pained expression on his face that he would never tell her what lay in their past…and she had caused him enough pain for one night.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you."

"Ya didn't upset me, Mi-chan; just surprised me a little, that's all." Tasuki seemed to have regained his composure. "Listen, I don't know about you, but I'm pretty tired, so maybe we better get out now. If ya don't mind, Mi-chan, pull out some fresh trousers for me. I buried my last set of clothes--they weren't worth savin,' trust me!" He gave her a crooked grin.

She did as he requested, changing into dry garments while he waited in the spring, then busying herself with Makaze to grant him privacy as he donned his own clothes. He let her know that he was finished by walking up to her and tousling her hair in a brotherly way. "Hey, Mi-chan, I meant ta ask ya--whatever made ya look for chestnuts in th' first place?"

She ducked her head sheepishly. "I wasn't. I just came across them by accident when I was looking for some mushrooms."

Tasuki stared at her a moment…then burst into howls of laughter, holding his sides. Finally he regained control, wiping tears from his eyes as he mounted his horse. "Sorry, Mi-chan!" he gasped. "It's just that--I gotta admit, I cursed the gods a few times this night. But I take it all back! They really were lookin' out fer me!"

Miaka stared up at him, perplexed. "What do you mean?"

"If you woulda fed me some magic mushrooms, right now you and 'Kaze would be chasin' me across th' plains as I ran bare-ass naked after imaginary butterflies, flappin' my arms an' tryin' ta fly!"

Miaka burst into giggles at that ridiculous image. Tasuki pulled her up onto Makaze's back, and the trio picked their way through the moonlit woods, accompanied by soft laughter as they traveled to a new campsite.

/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/

The next morning, Miaka rose first, unsurprised at Tasuki's exhaustion after his ordeal the night before. She patted Makaze, who stood dozing in the shelter of some scrub trees, and retrieved the canteen, hoping to put a pot of tea on the fire before Tasuki woke. A far-off movement on the horizon caught her eye.

She climbed the rise behind which they had taken shelter and shielded her eyes against the rays of the rising sun. There it was again, an arrhythmic waving motion. It looked like pennant flags attached to domelike structures in the distant hills.

"Tasuki!" she called out, regretting the necessity of waking him. "There's something out there!"

In an instant he was beside her, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. He squinted, trying to focus on what she had seen. Suddenly a brilliant smile burst across his features.

"Gers!" he exclaimed.

"What do you mean, gers?"

"They're the homes of the Hokkan nomads! We're saved, Miaka--civilization at last!"

/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-/
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Glossary of Japanese Terms:

Heika - Your Highness

Oyasumi nasai - Good night (formal)

Arigatou - thank you

Chichi-ue - Father; highly respectful form of address meaning something like "Lord Father"

Author's Notes: (4-19-04) Yes, I'm LATE! This has been a badly complicated few weeks, and I'm sure that some of you have lit candles in sympathy for my untimely demise. :P Others are asking, "Where the hell is Casting Stones?!!" Explanations as follows: Work, special projects, family commitments, work, Easter dinner for 12, more work, arrangements for travel abroad, work, bad case of sinusitis, and work. Yes, my aikido sensei has probably given me up for dead as well.

So why Hidden Paths instead of Casting Stones? Well, Casting Stones 12 is 80 complete, but I abandoned it last week because I wanted to post a Hidden Paths Tasuki-centric chapter in honor of his birthday, which was YESTERDAY, April 18. So why didn't I post it yesterday? Because 1) the Hotohori/Nuriko story arc grew more complex by the moment, increasing my writing time, and 2) just as I was about to upload this chapter to , my entire neighborhood suffered a power outage, and I found myself sitting in pitch blackness, staring at the blankness where my computer monitor was hidden.

Roku: Oh, bollocks!

So I've worked like crazy today, and here I am at last.

Okay, first of all, I know that this feels like two chapters melded into one. I really didn't intend that, but the Houki-Hotohori-Nuriko-Boushin storyline got darker and more complicated and differed so dramatically from the Tasuki-Miaka storyline that I didn't feel like "intercutting" scenes from each in my usual fashion. I could have dropped the Tasuki-Miaka storyline, but dammit, the whole reason for writing this chapter was to celebrate Tasuki's birthday!

Tasuki: Oh, thanks one whole hell of a lot for this one AGAIN, Roku! Last year, ya gave me a zipper accident and blew up my best friend; this year ya fuckin' poisoned me--whatcha got planned for my next birthday? Tyin' me to a cross and torturin' me?

Roku: Oh, no, baby, Watase-san is already doing that to you in the new Gaiden novel, Sanbou Den. I try to be original, don't you know?

Tasuki: That's it, I'm leavin' town!

Ummm, you can't get away as long as I have power flowing into my computer, sweetness!

That reminds me to give a very important credit: Many thanks to Tetris no Miko for her online summation of the Hotohori Gaiden Novel, which included summaries of the letters that Nuriko wrote to Houki, aaaaannnd for her online scans of the new Tasuki-Chichiri Gaiden novel Sanbou Den!

Okay, back to the story. Why the thousands of words spent on the Hotohori-Nuriko-Houki triangle? Because to me, this is one of the most complicated situations that occurs in Fushigi Yuugi canon...and it is completely ignored in the manga and anime (although Hotohori's gaiden novel touches on it in the letters between Nuriko and Houki.) OVA II avoided the inevitable conflicts by keeping Nuriko out of the Boushin storyline, and Eikou Den handled it like total crap, having the reincarnated Nuriko searching for and bonding with Hotohori...then standing aside smiling cheerfully as Hotohori ignored him (her) in favor of re-asserting his love for his wife and son. D'uh'uhhhhhhhh! I decided to look deeper into the painful situation that happened when the best friend of one character ended up marrying that person's true love. There are no easy or painless solutions, and I portrayed the multiple ramifications and complications to the best of my ability. Thanks for sticking with me, minna!

Other story remarks : Yes, I know that Miaka starts out calling Tasuki "Genrou" and reverts to addressing him as "Tasuki" once the situation becomes serious. He does the same with the Miki/Miaka terms. The point I was making was that they keep to one another's assumed names when things are normal, but under conditions of stress, they revert to calling each other by their true names. Onward and outward:

RESEARCH CORNER: Yes, the plants that Miaka placed in Tasuki's food are real, are found in China, and have those physiological effects.

T'Ien Shih Li, what Tasuki calls Hokkan Horse Chestnut, is actually Chinese Horse Chestnut. The chestnuts have a nutty, slightly sweet flavor, but unfortunately are a powerful emetic. (Tasuki translation: Makes ya barf!)
Han Lian Cao, also known as Eclipta prostata, can be used both to generate a black hair dye...and as a purgative, aka strong laxative. (Tasuki translation: Makes ya…okay, ya get th' picture!)

Am I giving you this info so that you can poison your friends and loved ones? No! Actually, these are "anti-poison" drugs, used by the Chinese to purge one's body of poison. The important lesson is what Tasuki shouts at Miaka - NEVER put anything in your food unless you're 100 certain of what it is. This is especially true of the hallucinogenic mushrooms that Tasuki jokes about; most species of mushrooms would kill him outright, seishi constitution or not.

Okay, back to lighter subjects: A note to Etrurielle from her review for Chapter 9. You are VERY sharp, girl, and absolutely right! Congratulations for being the first reviewer to make the Hidden Paths/Bridge connection!

Future stuff: Yes, Casting Stones 12 will be the next thing I post--the question is whether I'll manage to post it before I take off once again on my seemingly continuous world travels, this time to France! And Slovenia! France will have my best-beloveds accompanying me, but they will leave for the US when I go conferencing in Slovenia. Hopefully, I will have time to write while I'm in Slovenia, but knock on wood, 'cause every time I say I'll have time to write, the stuff hits the fan!

And you know what comes after I'm safely back at home, with Hidden Paths and Casting Stones both recently updated ---yes, I'm going back to Bridge, maybe even finishing off that epic fic at last!

Wish me luck on my travels, minna - and pray that the terrorists quit bombing the European Railways. Ryuen has promised that if something happens to me, and she never finds out the ending to "Bridge"...she is going to be very, VERY miffed!

Ja ne!

Roku

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(4-20-04) Additional note! A very warm thank you to Chibi-Kaz for imparting the info that the term "yurt" is slightly insulting to the Mongol people. Thus, the term for the Hokkan nomadic people's tents has been changed to "gers" upon her astute advice. Although the characterization of the Hokkan nomads will be based on several different ethnicities, including Russian and (in musical selection) Celtic, she is correct--the primary influence will be Mongolian, as it was in canon Fushigi Yuugi.
So thanks again, C-K! Boy, all you terrific readers make it easy for me to do research!