CHAPTER 10

Reid spent a lot of time alone. He refused to go out with the team at the end of the day, he kept to himself at the hotel, and even at work, he often opted to work alone, staying away from the bustle and keeping himself separated.

They knew why. He already had a voice in his head, he didn't need the voices of countless others cluttering up his mind. It would benefit no one, he would not be on his game, he would not get work done.

And he was getting work done. Lots of work. The team looked on with small smiles as he pored over files and wrote on the board, working and re-working the geographical profile. Occasionally, he would approach them with new information, and they would work that into their new profile.

"Garcia, can you find me any deaths of men between the ages of 20 and 27, matching... Reid's description? We need people with brothers, brothers in law, gay males, anyone and everyone who could be connected to our unsub. Most likely in the areas I'm about to send you. We need to figure out this guy's trigger. Maybe an anniversary?"

"Got it. I've got 15. Sending them now."

"Thanks, Babygirl." Morgan shut the phone, and watched closely as Reid excused himself and headed to the bathroom. Morgan growled under his breath, following him. The kid had been taking more bathroom breaks than usual, and actually seemed a bit more calm. He had an idea of what was happening.

But when he walked inside, he winced as he heard the sounds of retching. He swung open the stall door and found Reid on his knees in front of the toilet, gripping the bowl with white knuckles.

"You okay, kid?" Reid took a moment to recover, nodding faintly, then bent over the bowl again. Morgan approached, setting a hand on Reid's shoulder. "I'm proud of you, kid. For trying."

Reid moaned, then sat back, shivering. "I hate this."

"How long do you have clean?"

"Since yesterday."

"You used yesterday?" Reid tangled his fingers together, nodding and looking down. "Okay, kid. Okay. I'm not going to reprimand you. I'm just proud of the day you've got."

Reid looked down at the bandaging around his wrist. "Yeah. Me too."

The Man stood next to Morgan. "But are you happy? Are you enjoying having me around all the time? I know, my voice gets annoying. And I don't ever leave you alone. Doesn't that just suck? Don't you wish you could make me go away?"

Reid was quiet. He didn't want to respond to the voice. "Morgan?"

Morgan looked up. "Yeah, pretty boy."

"Thank you."

"For what?"

Reid was quiet for a moment longer. "I don't know. Everything."

Morgan smirked. "No problem, kid."

It really was no problem. No problem at all. All Morgan wanted was for his Pretty Boy to be safe, happy, and healthy. But he knew it was a long road ahead. A very long, winding, road.

And Reid wasn't there yet. Another week went by, and Reid managed to stay sober. Until he got the note. It was sitting on his bed at the hotel room. He picked it up when he got back from the office, reading over it with shaking hands.

"You can't think I'm not real now. -SR."

He dropped the note as a hand flew to his mouth, and he hitched on a sob. "No. No..."

Reid rushed to the bathroom, fishing a lighter from his bag and burning the small page up, then retrieving a packaged needle and the vial and preparing them with shaking hands. He settled on the floor against the wall, pushing the needle against his skin as he broke inside. The sobs overwhelmed him, the pain in his gut clenched his insides, his body temperature was through the roof. He felt sick, sick and nauseous and headache-y, and all sorts of wrong. He emptied the syringe into his vein, and sunk back slightly, letting his head slowly fall back. "Oh..."

The Man went away.

Morgan found him when he got back from the bar an hour later, from hanging out with the group, without Reid. "Aw, Reid. Reid man. Not again."

He settled down on the floor next to Reid, throwing an arm around his shoulder as he waited for him to come to. Reid nodded in and out of consciousness, letting small moans occasionally fall from his lips. "S'gone."

"What's gone, buddy."

"He's gone."

Morgan sighed, picking up the vial and studying it, before throwing it against the wall in his anger, the thing smashing and flying to pieces. "Good. Fucking good."

The next morning, Reid and Morgan walked out of the hotel room together, Reid standing rigidly and twisting his neck around occasionally, frowning at something. Morgan didn't have to guess what was bothering the kid. "Hey. Hey, what's he saying to you?"

Reid frowned. "Nothing. There's no one there. I'm fine."

The Man jogged up behind Reid, slapping him on the shoulder, sounding out of breath. "You almost left me back there in the hotel room, man. Good thing I caught up. What are we up to today?"

Reid frowned more, picking up his pace slightly. Morgan jogged to catch up.

The Man continued to speak. "Working on the case? Are you getting anywhere? I bet not. Worthless piece of crap."

Reid ignored him.

"What the hell do I have to do to get your attention these days? Tell you you're nothing. Tell you to hurt yourself? Hm, what if I tell you to hurt your friends? Your mother?"

Reid thought to himself, rather than speaking out loud - I won't do it.

"Ha! That's funny. I'm a part of you, remember? Together, we can do anything. We can tear the world apart. We can kill anything and everything you love." The Man held up a razor-blade, glinting as it caught the light. "We can kill yourself, even. Wouldn't you love that? Wouldn't you love to escape all of this?" Reid swatted behind him, and Morgan saw. He looked away. "Wouldn't you love to be free?"

"Yes..." Reid mumbled under his breath, and Morgan glanced over.

"What was that?"

Reid shrugged. "Nothing."

The Man grinned. "Should we do it right now? In front of Morgan?" He handed Reid the blade. Reid stopped, staring at it in the palm of his hand, his brow suddenly sweating and his heart beating faster.

Morgan glanced back, seeing the object in Reid's hand. "Whoa! Whoa, kid, where did this come from?" He carefully extricated the deadly object from Reid's hand. "Listen, kid. We need to get you somewhere safe. A doctor. A hospital. Anything."

A tear streamed down Reid's cheek, and he looked down. "I'll be fine."

"I can't believe you anymore, kid."

"Morgan, listen to me. I had it in the room. I was going to properly dispose of it. You can do that for me if you'd like. I'm really okay."

Morgan studied Reid for a moment, searching him, searching for the answers he knew he wouldn't find, then nodded slowly. "Okay. I'm trusting you, kid."

Reid nodded. "That's all I'm asking."

The Man shrugged. "Ah, well. We can always find another one."

Reid nodded softly. He would find another one. And he would do what he so desperately needed to do, once he got it.

He promised himself that.