A/N Okay, I'm going to admit this chapter is a little all over the place. There are some moments that are intended to be heavily emotional, and then there is a scene that is just flat out pointless fluff. I'm not really sure where it (and you'll know it when you come to it) came from. In any case, I hope you enjoy.
An hour later Leo returned to find the remainder of his family chatting amicably around the conference table. At his entrance, Raphael gave him a questioning look, but didn't say anything about the older Michelangelo's absence. Actually, the calm look Leo gave him halted the questions before they could be voiced. Instead he said, "We've got some basic battle plans put together if you're ready to hear them."
Leo gave him a small smile. "Tomorrow," he said. All conversation in the room halted at that moment, for just then the older Michelangelo came hesitantly into the room and moved to stand at the younger turtle's shoulder. Leo gave him an encouraging smile before turning back to the already seated turtles (April had left a while before to take care of other Resistance business). "Right now," Leo continued, "we have one small order of business to take care, and then it will be time for practice." Leo placed a gentle hand on Michelangelo's shoulder. "I think Mike has something he wants to say."
Michelangelo cleared his throat, nervously shifting his weight slightly from foot to foot. Unable to meet the others' eyes, he dropped his gaze to the floor. Only Leo's warm hand on his shoulder kept him from running from the room in absolute terror. Shell, this was even harder than he thought it would be. Finally he pulled his courage together enough to raise his head and meet Donny and Donatello's sympathetic gazes. "I…I just wanted to say I'm sorry," he said. Although he started out slowly, the words began to build and come out with ever increasing speed. "I didn't mean any of it. I shouldn't have said it, and I hope you can forgive me. But if you can't, I understand, and—"
Michelangelo was suddenly cut off as Leo stepped back, and the Geniuses were finally able to do what they had been longing to do since they first saw this wounded version of their younger brothers. They threw their arms around him and hung on like they were never going to let go. In an instant the older turtle returned the embrace, burying his face in their shoulders. A part of him was embarrassed that, once again, he had tears running down his face, especially in front of his Raphael, but a deeper part of him didn't care. All these tears were releasing the pain that had been buried in his soul for far too long. Besides, being able to feel a part of a family once more, even if it wasn't technically his own, was worth more than a few measly tears.
"You're forgiven, Michelangelo," Donatello whispered softly, his hand rubbing gently against the older turtle's battered shell.
"We knew you didn't mean it," Donny added, tightening his grip.
Michelangelo sniffed and then made himself step away from the younger turtles. Wiping the tears from his face, his gave the Geniuses his very first smile in even he couldn't remember how long. "So, bros, can I have another chance," he asked softly, his eyes never leaving theirs. "I want to help. And this time I really do mean help."
"We'd be happy to have you," Donny told him.
Michelangelo lifted his eyes to look at the Menaces. "Do either of you have a problem with my joining you?"
Raphael grinned at him. "Welcome aboard, bro."
To everyone's surprise, it was Raph who didn't respond with an immediate affirmative. "Are you planning on throwing anymore tantrums," he asked the older turtle. Rather than getting angry, Michelangelo just smiled again.
"Not unless I have to," he said. Then he got a very familiar sly look on his face. "After all, there are three of you Raphaels around now. It may take all three of us Michelangelo's to keep you on your toes."
Raph and Raphael groaned good naturedly as the Brats hooted in delight over their older self's response.
"All right, all right," Leo said, smiling. "Now that we've gotten that settled, my brothers need to head on down to the dojo. It's time for evening practice. Michelangelo, Raphael," he said to the older turtles, "feel free to join us. We'd be happy to have you." And with that, Leo began ushering his younger siblings out the door.
The one eyed Raphael got up to follow them, only to be stopped when Michelangelo said, "Raphie, would you mind waiting a minute?" Raphael wasn't sure if it was the surprise of hearing his childhood nickname, or the soft, hesitant tone of his brother's voice, but either way he found himself frozen in his tracks. He turned back to face his younger brother. The uncertain body language was back, he noted to himself, and Michelangelo was having difficulty meeting his gaze.
"What can I do for you," he asked his brother, his tone neutral.
"I, well, I wantedtoappologizetoyoutoo," Michelangelo blurted out in a rush. His cheeks took on a definite reddish tinge. It took a moment to decipher exactly what Michelangelo had said. Once it clicked, however, Raphael knew he had to respond appropriately, or risk hurting his brother horribly. So, taking a page from the younger turtles' book, Raphael moved over to his younger brother and enveloped him in his first hug in over three decades. At first, Michelangelo was as stiff as a frozen tree. The response saddened the one-eyed turtle. Once upon a time, Michelangelo would have returned the embrace as warmly and carelessly as a child. Now in his place was a cold stranger that Raphael was partially responsible for creating.
"Ah, Mike, it's okay. And I'm sorry too," Raphael whispered hoarsely. Apparently that was exactly what the younger turtle needed, for suddenly he was returning the hug as just as fiercely as Raphael was offering it. For a long moment, the brothers just stood there, soaking up each other's presence. When at last they let each other loose, Raphael exchanged the hug for an arm draped over his brother's shoulders. Leading him back to the table, he encouraged Michelangelo to take a seat, whereupon he took a chair right next to him. "I owe you an explanation," he told his younger brother.
"Raph—"
"No, let me speak," Raphael said, cutting off the protest. "I hurt you badly. I just want you to know, it never had anything to do with you. I know it doesn't help after all these years, but it was never my intention to hurt you by staying away. Partly, I'll admit, it was selfishness. All I could see was my own pain, and it blinded me to pretty much everything else. But partly I was, in my own way, trying to protect you. It may not have seemed like it, but I knew how much my fights with Leonardo bothered you. I also knew that, after the Lair was destroyed, my control over my temper was too slippery to be trusted around anyone else. Even if I didn't mean to, there was an excellent chance that I would have taken it out on you, and I didn't want to risk it. So I left. And over the years, my pride made it easier and easier to convince myself that you were doing just fine without me, that you didn't need me anymore, so I continued to stay away."
"But I did need you," Michelangelo exclaimed. "After we lost Donatello, you and Leonardo were all I had to depend on, especially once sensei died. But you both left. At first, you just withdrew emotionally. Sure you were still there physically, but it was like living with a couple of robots. And then, after the Lair was destroyed, you were gone physically, too. Without a word, without a goodbye, you both just disappeared. I was hurting, and scared, and utterly and completely alone. So I pushed myself to become a better warrior, hoping that maybe I'd be good enough, and you'd be proud enough of me to come back. But you never did. Eventually, I stopped caring what either of you thought. I didn't need you. I didn't need anyone; or, at least that's what I told myself. But Raphie, I can't do it anymore. Our younger selves have shown me what family is supposed to be like. I want my family back. I want my big brothers back, if I can have them."
Unabashedly taking his brother's hand in his, Raphael said fervently, "I'm here little brother. Like you, I've decided that I don't like how my life is going, and I want my family back, too. So, if you're willing to forgive a grouchy, ill-tempered, one-eyed old turtle for a brother, I would desperately love to be a part of your family again."
This time it was Michelangelo's turn to initiate the hug. All but flinging himself out of his chair, he wrapped his arms around his older brother's neck. In that moment, the years melted away. All the years of anger and hurt disappeared, and they were simply brothers, rather than familiar strangers, once more.
TMNTTMNT
Half an hour into practice, Leo looked up to see the two older turtles enter the room, Raphael's arm draped familiarly over his brother's shoulders. Grinning, he nudged Raph to take a look. The younger leather-masked turtle turned and grinned at the sight. The touching scene was quickly broken up, however, as the Brats went bounding up to them and dragged Raphael away for some more one-on-one practice. That left Michelangelo standing alone. Leo was about to make his way to the older turtle, but the Geniuses got there first. After a few softly spoken words the one-armed turtle allowed himself to be led further in the room by the two younger turtles.
Watching the interactions between his brothers and the older turtles made Leo smile. He was glad that after everything his own family had been through that now they could reach out to this third family and teach them how siblings were supposed to act. Leo was suddenly knocked out of his rambling thoughts by Raph, who had snuck up behind him and was tickling his sides unmercifully. Howling with laughter, Leo squirmed away from his younger brother, only to be tackled by Raphael. With his twin holding Leo down, Raph was then free to attack his brother's feet.
"Stop, please," Leo panted, laughter-induced tears running down his face as he tried to throw his brother off his back.
"Uh-uh," Raphael said, holding his big brother's hand down with one of his own while using his free hand to tickle his brother's sensitive sides. "You were thinking too deeply. Menace junior and I decided you needed to lighten up a little."
"I'll show you lightening up," Leo gasped. With a tremendous heave, he bucked his brother off his back. Raphael rolled away from his brother, coming to his feet a short distance away. There was a dangerous glint in Leo's eyes as he turned to face both of his younger brothers. The sai-wielding twins looked at each other, then back at Leo. In unison, they stuck their tongues out at him.
"Nyah, nyah, catch us if you can," Raph taunted. He and Raphael were so focused on Leo that they weren't aware of the Brats sneaking up behind them. Suddenly, it was the Menaces who found themselves hitting the ground as their youngest brothers began to return the favor and tickle them. That didn't mean Leo was off the hook, however, as he found himself trapped between Donny and Donatello who were doing an amazingly good job of tickling him, while staying just out of reach at the same time. It didn't take long for the whole affair to turn into one big free for all game of tickle tag. In the end, no one was safe, not even the older Raphael and Michelangelo.
Finally, twenty minutes later, the nine exhausted turtles just sort of collapsed all over the makeshift dojo. "Do you do this a lot," the oldest Michelangelo asked Mikey once he caught his breath.
"Not so much recently," the youngest turtle replied. "What with Leo dying a couple of times in the past month, and then his kidnapping by the crazy Babbots just before that, things have been a bit serious around the Lair for a while. But when things aren't crazy, then yeah, practice usually ends something like this."
"Whoa, whoa, did you say Babbots? As in Peter and James Babbot," the older Raphael asked, overhearing the conversation. "I knew my two doubles said that Leo had been kidnapped by a couple of psychos, but somehow I missed that it was the Babbots."
"Let me guess," Leo said as he and the rest of the family regrouped around the trio. "You've had some interactions with one or both of those, what was it I heard that Raphael called them? Oh, yeah, those over-qualified candidates for the loony bin."
"That describes, well I should say described, them perfectly," Raphael responded. "I found out that Saki was turning particularly troublesome prisoners over to James for his version of hunting. That was one kill I don't feel ashamed of admitting to. As for Peter, Saki had him working in one of his think tanks. I'm not sure how, but someone got past the guards and took that slimy bastard out, too."
"Uh, actually that was me," the older Michelangelo admitted somewhat self-consciously. "He was causing too many casualties among the resistance, so we had to take him out. I tried offering him a place with our people, but he was too twisted. In the end, it was just easier to put him out of our misery."
"Hey, you're not going to get any judgment from us," the younger Raphael told him, placing a supportive hand on his shoulder. "For one, we have no room to speak, having taken out the Babbots in our dimension. Number two, war often requires you to do things you normally wouldn't. And three, those two nut jobs were pure evil, and deserved everything they got."
"Okay, well, enough serious talk," Mikey said. "I'm starved. I say we go get something to eat."
"Sounds good to me," Leo seconded. "And then we should all head off to bed." Ignoring his brothers' groans he added, "Tomorrow's going to come quickly. Besides, we have a battle coming our way in the next few days, and we need to be as rested as we can."
As he herded his brothers out of the dojo, Leo looked over at the two older turtles. "Why don't the two of you join us tonight," he suggested. "We have more than enough room where we're sleeping."
"I don't know," Michelangelo hedged, looking decidedly uncomfortable. Raphael, on the other hand, looked downright shocked by the proposal.
"Hey, Cyclops," his younger self called from the door where he was waiting for Leo. "Get your mind out of the gutter. Sleeping, and I mean that in the most literal sense, with your bros is a great way to reconnect. There is nothing better than feeling your siblings cuddled up next to you, and knowing that, at least for the time being, everyone is safe and where they're supposed to be."
"And trust me," Raph said as he, too, came back to check on his big brother. "Coming from Mr. Emotional Constipation over here, that's saying a lot."
The one-eyed turtle and the one-armed turtle looked at each other. After a brief moment, Michelangelo turned back to the younger turtles. "All right," he said. "We accept.
With a wide grin, Raphael (the one with two working eyes) slung an arm over the older turtle's shoulders. "Good choice, bro, good choice," he said. "Now, let's get to that food before the Brats eat everything."
"Uhm, have you seen the menu around here," the older Raphael asked. "I doubt that's very likely."
"Dude," Raph said, "you haven't seen our youngest brothers in action. If it even looks like food, and as long as it isn't still moving, they'll eat it."
The others cracked up at that, and the small group headed out the door.
TMNTTMNT
From the shadows, unnoticed, Leonardo watched his brothers leave with the new arrivals. Although it was difficult seeing them rebond with each other, and make new connections with their younger selves, at least it made his decision easier. Tomorrow he would make his goodbyes, and then he would disappear for good. It was clear, now more than ever, that his brothers didn't need him. He'd failed them one too many times, and now they had a new leader, for there was no denying that his brothers were treating young Leo like their leader, to look after them. So he would face them one last time to say goodbye. This was one task he refused to let himself fail at, for his brothers deserved to hear directly from him that he was going. And then he would finally be free to let his life end as it would.