Harry potter had finished his homework and said goodnight to his three friends then went up to bed, yawning tiredly. With all the training from the Keeper and the poker collective he had accidentally started, he had stopped getting enough sleep at night.

But before he could crawl under the covers after the evening rituals-shower, brush, and redrawing the protection runes on the headboard the Keeper had taught him to protect him from the Brotherhood, a defunct secret society his great-grandfather had destroyed-he pulled his sheath of printouts of a gun and studied it, using the darkness to craft a slightly downsized variant that fit in his hand.

"Good," the keeper said as he stepped out of a shadow. "Soon we can test it."

Harry nodded, admiring the gun, chuckling at the maker's mark on it: the Potter crest with black oil dripping off it, the serial number looking like it had been scraped off.

The gun continued assembling slowly, the slide appearing and forming around the barrel that extended an inch past the slide.

He had been planning to ask about the cans that made guns quieter in movies until the Keeper let him know the gun would be as loud as he wanted it so the barrel had ended up taking on a dangerous looking tined appearance.

The gun finished assembling after nearly six minutes-as he practiced the various abilities, the weapons, armor, and tools he could build would become easier and faster to summon.

Harry cast the spell he had spent all of october trying to learn and stepped out of the shadows. His gun didn't disappear as the dying sun splashed across it. While the spell wouldn't work for the Darklings or the 'bullets' fired from it for now since it had to be touching him, at least he knew the light wrapping spell worked-and there was a bonus he realized: the gun was no longer visible due to light not reflecting. He only knew he still had it in his hand due to feeling it.

The gun and spells dissipated as he heard the door open, his roommates coming in, talking softly. The last time they had awoken harry he had accidentally hexed them all they decided. In fact it had been the Darklings hitting them all with pepper spray-they just barely understand that his roommates weren't enemies.

"Oh, you're still up?"

"Not for long," Harry replied to Neville. "Night all."

They returned his words then trudged off to do their own evening rituals as Harry settled in his bed. His last thoughts were 'I wonder what that flippy down thing on the gun is for?' and 'I wonder what that second trigger pack on the page is for?'

The Darklings answered that in his sleep that night. The copier cut off the name of the gun, a Beretta 93r and the flip down part was for his left hand to hold to steady the weapon in burst fire, the second trigger pack was for full auto mode.

Harry woke up earlier than normal, more excited than usual for a monday with Snape his first lesson. The Keeper had taught him about some of the Potter family spells. His favorite so far was a spell for crafting something called magicite, magic made solid and used to permanently power charms and enchantments on items. He realized that he could use magicite to get back at the twins for turning his hair pink. They had hit Hermione as well and she had started looking for something to get back at them. She had decided on charming their shoes to turn their robes transparent randomly for varying amounts of time.

Harry found her waiting for him, Neville, and Ron and he leaned forward to whisper into her ear how to make magicite and its potential for making her charm into a permanent enchantment.

She hugged him tightly then ran up to the twins' dorm room.

"What was that about?" Ron asked.

"I found a way to get back at the twins for the pink hair."

They decided to wait for her and ten minutes later, she returned, looking quite satisfied, the head boy with her. He smiled at the first years. "Great idea," he said, winked, then walked off.

"He made sure it was safe for me to go into their room. Now when the twins stand in front of their trunks their shoes will be enchanted," she whispered.

The first time it worked was later that night at dinner. Fred's robes turned transparent, showing off the fact he wore boxers with VERY buxom women snogging each other. And a frilly pink bra.

The students in the great hall burst out laughing then his robes were normal student robes again.

McGonagall took ten points for the prank from the twins-she assumed one of theirs had backfired-and another fifteen for wearing women's undergarments, remarking "Pink is not your color, mr. Weasley, try avocado," to the shocked amusement of the whole school.

Fred glowered as a bright pink Hermione-a little shocked at herself and a bit traumatized she had actually done what she did-leaned over to whisper to the three boys that the head boy had added the bra to the enchantment and added a matching knicker if they were without undergarments that day. They laughed even harder as the twins sat down near them, annoyed that someone had pranked them but the two got excited that they had competition once George remarked "You know, having a grudge against other pranksters will make us better."

Fred brightened at that and they grabbed food to go then dashed off to figure out what happened. Harry wondered how long it would take them to find the issue. As long as they didn't realize Hermione had enchanted the stones in front of their trunks, it would happen again and again until she removed it. Or staff found it.

Potions class was much the same, Draco attempted to sabotage Harry's potion, Snape took points from Gryffindor for no reason, and Harry pushed his anger down, not realizing that as his anger grew, the Darklings were unsettled.

Their next class was Defense and the four Gryffindors scrambled out of Potions as quickly as possible. Malfoy had an accident once the four were out of the classroom, 'tripping' and slamming face forward onto a desk as soon as he got too close to a shadowed corner.

While Quirrell was a stuttering fool, he followed the prescribed lesson plan Dumbledore-Defense followed a syllabus the last tenured Defense professor had put together in the fifties, deviating only as they saw fit and as updated every few years-had put together so the students mostly read along in class, trying to tune him out unless they were called on.

"That was a pretty good class," Hermione said and Neville nodded. They had discussed various plants that could be used as temporary wards against dark creatures.

"I'm more interested in spells," Harry admitted and Ron nodded quickly.

"Totally," Ron said. "I mean, sure, silverleaf is great for pinkies and werewolves but a pinky hex or a silver lance spell is better."

Hermione agreed a bit. "I guess it is harder to always have that stuff on you."

"Oh, Ron, you mentioned something about the satchels aurors can use?" Harry asked.

He nodded excitedly as they walked to lunch. "Yeah, they're great. A undetectable space expansion charm on the book area and a sorting charm to help you find what you need, a built in chameleon tent for stakeouts, and a bunch of layers of potions and supplies and stuff. They're really expensive though. Like twenty galleons each. My brother Bill-he's the oldest, he's a curse breaker at Gringott's-just got one from the bank for all his good work."

Harry looked at hermione and she did the math. "About 4200 pounds!"

His went wide. "We should totally learn the charms to make our own!" Harry said and they all nodded as Hermione took out her spells-2-learn planner her mother had surprised her with. It had been at the counter at Flourish and Blotts. Each page had little squares for drawing the motion of wand movement, writing down the incantation, and note taking space. Once it was full and you could demonstrate proficiency with all of the spells at a workshop in Diagon Alley, you got a second one with spells already filled in. It was usually used for home schooled students to help their parents guide their schooling.

She wrote the spells on the inner cover so she could look them up later then they sat down.

As soon as they did so, four plates filled with their favorite meals and mint shakes in old fashioned shake glassware appeared on the table.

"What just happened?" Neville asked. He had missed the house meeting the night before.

"New lunch service," Ron replied. "If you're still hungry after that plate, just touch your wand to the plate and request what you want. The house-elves in the kitchen wanted to do it this way. Only breakfast will be the old way from now on."

"House-elves?" Hermione asked.

Neville explained about them.

"They sound like slaves?" she asked.

"They aren't. I mean, you can buy and sell them BUT if they ask to be let go, you have to set a price and time to work that off and they work until it's met gran told me. They rarely do that though since they love to work. We bought one recently. Her name's Kizzy, she likes to help in the gardens when the house is cleaned."

Hermione frowned and made a mental note to try and meet one. She didn't like what she had heard.

Ron went through three plates in the time it took the other three to eat their meals.

Harry mostly ignored the conversation. The Darklings had told him about house-elves and the two Potter elves had died or passed away over the past decade.

He finished his shake and noticed Hermione hadn't drank hers. "Are you going to drink that?"

"Not today. You can have it."

"Thirds?" Harry asked the two boys and they nodded.

He poured a third into each of their glasses then drank the rest quickly.

Hermione returned from the library just before curfew to find Harry raking a pile of promises on scraps of paper-some bets were promises to help with homework or buy a specific item or items for specific amounts while in Hogsmeade-knuts and sickles, and a lonely looking galleon into his satchel.

"Thanks guys," he said to the rest of the poker collective then headed upstairs to count his haul. He had been told it was rude to count his money at the table.

A sixth year slid into Harry's seat and was dealt in.

Hermione joined him in the first year's dorm and saw he had won almost five galleons in total.

"Wow!" she said, sitting on his trunk. "Here. I found that spell you were wondering about." She handed him a piece of parchment with the incantation and spell movement. "The incantation is spiculum. Draw out the coo but be careful. The arrow's size and speed is based on how much power you put in it. The book said that a duelist used it in a match and destroyed a ten foot section of wall when it hit. He was banned for life from dueling competitions for using a spell he hadn't practiced before."

"Thanks. How goes the satchel research?"

"Some of it is in the restricted section. I'm going to ask professor flitwick either for a pass or if he knows the spells already. Hopefully we can start making them soon but it depends on when the canvas bits arrive?"

"Ordering those tonight," he replied, stuffing half a galleon's worth of sickles into a sack and gesturing Hedwig over. Harry finished addressing the request then tied it carefully to Hedwig's harness. "Fly safe," he told her then walked to the window and opened it.

She flung herself out the window and soon disappeared into the night. She would likely arrive just in time for the shop to open the next morning he knew. From there it would be days possibly before their required design was finished. It was costing so much for the work since they were including some of the runework in the crafting process.

Hermione said goodnight and Harry watched her go then ducked his head under the bed and checked his project. Four days since he had crafted a turtle from the Darkness. It was still moving around under his bed, chewing the lettuce.

"Did i create life?" he asked a bit nervously.

"No," the Keeper said, frightening Harry and making the boy fall off the bed.

The boy popped back up. "I meant to do that!"

The Darklings hid their amusement at that. While they were unwilling to harm their master, that didn't stop them from finding amusement in his falls when they caused them by accident.

"The Darkness can create life. You must never do this. Should the Darkness gain a mind of its own again your world would be ravaged. The dinosaurs were destroyed the last time the Darkness had its own sentience."

Just in case, Harry made the turtle vanish then settled into to practice his armor and guns after his evening rituals.

He wondered about the Darklings all night. They seemed alive.

"We're constructs," the Keeper reminded him. "We're the darker aspects of your personality, the bits you don't like, understand, or want to deal with. Your grandfather had a journal about this. We will attempt to find it. Tonight's dream though will be what we saw of your father and parents through the years."

Harry smiled happily at that thought, instantly forgetting about their being based off his own personality.

Hermione wondered at Harry's expression all morning but decided not to ask. She assumed he had had interesting dreams. Instead she turned to Neville as they ate lunch. "Did you get the saps and leaves we need?"

He nodded. "Professor Sprout said if the bags turn out properly she would be interested in purchasing one for herself."

"Ron?" She asked.

He shook his head. "Soon. My brother has to be careful, he doesn't want to break down the work on his and make it impossible to be used properly. His letter said another week but probably longer, they're cleansing a new grave so the muggles who found it can get back to work on it."

She nodded and made a note to ask Bill about his job if she ever met him. It sounded very interesting.

She went back to eating and reading Hogwarts, A History. The library had received the latest revision. She had heard it was going to discuss Harry in this one.

She found the section on notable students and saw it was more about his parents, only mentioning his recent arrival and sorting into Gryffindor, the historic seat of his family. She immediately thought of the perfect birthday present-she knew it couldn't be completed by Christmas. Hermione put the book away then went up to ask Professor McGonagall about genealogy.

She returned to her friends and smiled as she sat down. Finally a group project where she wasn't expected to do it all. The most of it, she reminded herself, but not ALL of it!

Emmett opened the letter and saw it wasn't from Hermione.

Mr and mrs Granger,

Thanks for the copies and the delicious ginger cookies. I've never had them before but they're now my favorite.

I wondered if you might have any information on a weapon called the stin machine gun? One of the other muggleborns was talking about it and i wanted to see what he meant.

But the main reason i wrote. When is hermione's birthday?

Thanks,

Harry

Emmett carried the letter inside and went to check his father's books. His family had manufactured the first prototypes so he was sure he had information about them.

He found them then put the books aside to take to their clinic the next morning.

He sat down to write his reply.

Harry,

Thank you for the mint shake recipe, you're right, the drop of chocolate oil added makes it even better. I'm enclosing some exploded views of the Sten, the recipe for Dani's pepper nuts(the cookies), and her birthday has passed, it's september 19th. (Her favorite color is blue, it sets off her skin properly.)

He signed the letter then placed it on the books.

Emmett went to shower and prepare for their date night. A new italian restaurant had opened and they were doubling with old friends who were visiting the country.

Dani dropped the package off in the mail-parents could mail packages to London where they were resent via owl-then walked back to their clinic, wondering when Emmett would return. Since he never scheduled clients on monday, he had gone to his family's manufacturing plant to poison himself with testosterone.

She sighed. She didn't hate guns. But she didn't like them. And she just hated how he came home stinking of gunpowder, scotch, and cigars when he and his dad got together for a day of firing off guns. What was even worse was Hermione loving clay shooting.

Harry was reading again how bullets worked then looked at the various charms and hexes that created explosions. He made a note to ask Hermione to ask about how much pressure there was behind a bullet when it exploded. The two guns he had blueprints of didn't have that information but the information about different bullets having different potentials was on the copies.

He wanted to build a magazine that could duplicate bullets of real metal with magical cartridges that exploded at the same potential required for each gun. If he could do that, his light warping spell would allow him to use his Darkness guns in the day.

"What are you working on?" Hermione asked as she joined him at the library table.

"Magic bullets."

Her eyes widened. "Why?"

"I finished my homework and i thought it would be impossible but it's actually not," he half-lied and flipped his work for her to look at.

She studied it and thought it was brilliant. Her dad went birding all the time. She had bitten down on shot more than once. If she could make magic shot that disappeared, she wouldn't have to ever worry about it again.

He decided he wanted his research back. "Can you look at my essay?"

She took out her red quill and ink and began making notes on it, correcting his spelling. His grammar was good enough and his essays were usually well written though short. Harry wrote big but always had all the information required.

Neville and Ron joined them, Ron sighing heavily at being stuck in the library.

Harry looked up at his two roommates and resisted the urge to toss a ball for Ron to chase when the redhead looked at him with a disturbingly puppyish fashion.

Neville helped Harry with his herbology essay then the four were herded out by the librarian for dinner.

Harry sat down and blinked at his meal. It was a well lacquered slice of wood with rice bundles and other stuff on it. "What's this?"

"Sushi," hermione said, looking at her own plate of shepherd's pie. She was starting to regret signing up for the random meals instead of the structured meals-structured let you see a menu on sunday and select what you want for each day. "Do you want to trade?"

"No, unless you don't like that. I've always wanted to try this. I didn't realize it was today i guess."

She pointed out what was what as Ron and neville happily attacked their own shepherd's pie dishes. They had both signed up for Isle only meals.

Harry peeked over the seat back then turned, trying to stifle his laughter. The Weasley twins were walking through the common room, their robes tight, their chests ballooned to comedic proportions and their voices falsettos only matched in outrageousness by their six inch platform heels and their beehive hairdos of fondant.

"Thanks Keeper," Harry whispered to the shadows. A pair of eyes winked back at him.

He wondered when they would try to taste their hair-as soon as they ate some it would reverse the hexes.

Harry was sneaking through the shadows of the castle, practicing shadowsteps and shadowwalking when he found an open classroom in a disused corridor though he noticed footprints in the light layer of dust. Intrigued, he walked in and stopped to stare at a mirror, freezing when he found himself surrounded by people he had dreamt of due to his Darklings. He spun around but no one else was in the room save for Darklings who slowly began appearing a few at a time.

The Keeper stood next to his master. "What do you see?"

"My family. They all look so happy."

"It's the mirror, master. It shows you what you want. I see us Darklings terrorizing your enemies."

The other darklings all nodded or said some sort of affirmative.

"He's quite right."

They all spun to see the Headmaster in the door. The Darklings faded.

"Call the Keeper back, Mr Potter. I didn't think you would inherit them until you were seventeen."

He summoned up a pair of chairs. "Since you were eleven, yes?"

Harry nodded and at the Keeper's nod, the boy began telling the man about the Darklings and what they were teaching him.

"Well, please keep your nocturnal jaunts to friday and saturday nights from now on," he said after a few moment's thought.

"Master? The other Keeper?" The Darkling prompted.

"Oh, right. You netter tell him, though."

The keeper nodded and began speaking. "After the Master died-the Master's grandfather-we should have gone to the Master's father but he was hidden. But we couldn't go to them because the secret keeper was a Pettigrew. His family-"

"I'm sorry, did you say a Pettigrew?" His voice thundered.

The Keeper nodded.

"Back to your dorm, Mr. Potter, I have some work to do. We'll doscuss your family ability at a later date."

Harry waited until the man left, walking much faster than a man of that age should, he thought then used the shadows to get back to the bathroom of their dorm.

Albus Dumbledore used the floo in his office to transfer straight to his office at the Ministry and sent out Ministry night aides to wake his aides and get them in.

Alliona Gimberjack stumbled sleepily into the Ministry, bypassing security when they waved her past.

She almost made it to the office half-asleep when a paper cup of coffee was held out in front of her. "Pepper-up latte," her co-worker, Gregor Witwalker said.

She drank half of it gratefully, grimacing at the steam coming out of her ears. "Why did he call us in?"

"We're going over every death eater trial and tribunal, looking for inconsistencies."

Albus left Sirius Black's file for last but had had the man transferred to the Ministry holding facilities, using Harry's return to Magic as the reason. If anyone asked, he planned to have Sirius's punishment be sensationalized again.

He found the majority of the files completed properly. Memories or statements from witnesses were properly filed and memories of confessions were annotated. But there were inconsistencies. In a number of files done by Barty Crouch Sr. the files were often marked Tribunal without the sign off of the then head of the Wizengamot, the vice-head-Albus himself, or the then-minister.

He set those aside to deal with. Barty, as much trouble as he had due to his son, was about to have a lot more.

Finally, he turned to Sirius's file and opened it. The same issues. A tribunal. Without the proper sign off, confession-veritaserum-induced or otherwise, nor proper witnesses. The only memory inside was of a Shell-shocked Sirius bemoanedly saying it was all his fault.

But with what the Keeper said...

Albus sent a cracker out his door and Alliona came in with a tea service. "Oh, thank you," he said as she poured his tea. "I want you to floo Remus Lupin at either Lupin Loop or he'll be at the men's SRO in Knockturn Alley. If he's not at either, he must be out of country. You'll have to owl him then."

She nodded and went to do so, wondering why someone would stay at the SRO of they had their own home.

Remus Lupin opened his door, wand held loosely, a push dagger in the hand he opened it with. He saw the old woman that ran the desk and rented the rooms.

"You've got a floo from some chit at the ministry. Wants you to come in, speak with her boss."

Remus nodded, deciding to pack up. He hadn't learned much and Albus didn't need to pay him for a lack of results. Maybe he could head back to Switzerland and talk to the packs there.

He sighed as he walked along, slinging his backpack on and heading out to see who he thought it was, one of Albus's Wizengamot assistants. "Tell him i'll be there once i've had breakfast."

"What do you want? I'll have it ready for you. A fry-up?"

"That'll be fine but triple up on the meats."

She nodded and the fire died down, turning red.

When Remus arrived, the woman led him to a dining room, handing him a pepper-up latte and telling him how they were getting popular due to some muggleborns.

He ate the meal leisurely. Albus had told him to take his time due to his workload.

Cornelius Fudge gratefully accepted the tea from his aide then headed to level nine. He had been told Albus had been in all night, going over files and had transferred two prisoners from Azkaban to interrogate them.

He was annoyed by this until the young man on Albus's staff told him that the previous Ministry had been at fault-Albus had told his assistant to make sure he got this across-and it was possible the two prisoners had information that was useful.

He smiled at Albus when he walked into the man's office. "Albus, good morning. Who are these prisoners?"

"Momar Calais and Sirius Black." Fudge shuddered at Black's name. "Barty didn't properly interrogate a number of people but these two have very good reasons to be hit with veritaserum. I've got them in the holding cells and i'll have some people from St Mungo's here in an hour or so to make sure they're ready for it."

Fudge hesitated then nodded. "Well, do have your people keep mine informed."

Albus nodded and looked at the files of Death Eaters that had died in Azkaban. They could wait, he decided.

Albus copied the files that had issues then sent the originals all back down to the archives.

Remus stood when Albus walked into the private dining room he had been sequestered in. "Any luck?"

"No. Nothing, i was thinking about heading back to Switzerland or Eastern Europe and contact the packs in those areas."

"I have a much more important mission here. I've received very credible evidence Sirius wasn't the secret keeper, that he switched places with Pettigrew behind our back."

Remus went weak at the knees and clasped at the chair. "Are-are you sure?"

"Sirius is here. In seventy two hours he'll be questioned under veritaserum. For now we've got people from St. Mungo's looking after him. I'd let you see him but-"

"But because i'm a were," Remus finished. "I can't see him."

"Did you see the papers? Harry was sorted into Gryffindor."

Remus grinned, he hadn't seen that news.

"What was the evidence?" Remus asked after some thought.

"Did James ever tell you about his family legacy?"

Remus looked confused then his eyes went wide when he realized what Albus was talking about. "You mean-that wasn't him teasing us? The Darkness is real? Harry-little Harry can control the Darkest creatures?"

"The Darkest creatures that willingly serve one of the Lightest families ever.

"And i think they're teaching him pranks. He's looked very self-satisfied when a number of pranks that have been seventh year level have hit certain members of the student body." He explained the pranks that had plagued the children of death eaters in Slytherin and the Weasley twins.

Remus didn't stop laughing.

Sirius Black had asked a number of times what the date was. No one would tell him the year. All he knew was it was 11 November.

He was led into the Wizengamot. Seated were Amelia Bones, Albus Dumbledore, two witches he didn't recognize, a wizard he thought might be that brown-noser from Regulations Cornelius Fudge, Moody looking even more haggard, and Amos Diggory he thought.

He didn't notice the handful of witnesses behind him, including Moony, Dame Longbottom, and Arthur Weasley, the latter two invited since his potential ward was friends with their children-as well as the Longbottoms having been Aurors alongside James and Sirius.

Albus looked at the scrap of parchment his assistant had done the math on. If Sirius was found innocent, he was due 120,000 galleons of backpay for ten years as an Auror, 15 galleons per every hour spent in azkaban as overtime-1,314,870 in total, and the normal wrongful imprisonment reimbursement of 7 galleons a day-another 28,210 galleons. A tidy sum, Albus thought, failing to curb his inner sarcastic voice. Not including the cost of his rehabilitation, wand replacement, wardrobe, and various other sundries which would probably tack on another thousand galleons easily. Then Albus remembered hazard pay-2.5x the totaled amount as dictated by law, and dementors were definitely a hazard without a patronus medallion-and silently groaned. When Sirius was exonerated it was going to destroy the next two years of budgets.

Albus gestured the veritaserum forward.

An auror placed the three drops on Black's tongue then stepped back, his wand held at ready but aimed at the floor.

And then the questioning began once the silencing spell was removed.

It was madness when they found out what the previous Ministry had done.

Sirius lay sleeping in his bed in the high security ward of St. Mungo's, Remus watched him, trying not to fixate on how many galleons were being transferred from Ministry accounts to the newly reactivated Black accounts. The Blacks had been old and powerful but not very rich. Now Sirius was nearly half as rich as his godson, at least monetarily. The Potter land holdings were extensive, including Lupin Loop. James had tried to give it to him but Remus liked paying rent to his friends' son.

Albus had promised him custody but there had been conditions. He would have to be well enough as certified by a healer they both trusted: madam Pomfrey. He would have to live in a home Albus selected: Sirius had already authorized him to purchase one with his new funds.

The blood wards on Privet Drive encompassed a mile in radius. While Figg's home was just outside that there was a home for sale, a large five room home two blocks over-Albus planned to surprise Sirius with a basement saferoom for Remus's monthly-the wards would recenter over the new home but still protect the Dursleys, sapping the blood of Petunia to help power them. He also, upon learning how the Dursleys had treated Harry, began crafting notice-me-nots aimed at the two males of the family.

Albus sighed as he changed his brand new chartreuse and lavender robes to a somewhat threadbare looking suit then walked out of the pub and into London.

He stepped into the investment bank Vernon Dursley used and spent an hour setting up what he needed. Now Sirius Black owned 90% of 11 Free Lane with the other 10% owned by a number of cutouts that were then owned by Vernon and Petunia Dursley's invest,ent portfolio. It was enough to properly recenter the wards, power them properly, and safeguard both families.

There was one final condition, one unstated but known by all. Harry had to want to go. Albus didn't know that Harry knew a bit about his father's life due to the Keeper and the others and had recovered some memories of his parents and their friends.

He wondered idly if the Darklings were related to house-elves then remembered the legend, they were born of the moon and shadows in some way.

A frisson of amusement ran through him. He had accidentally once tried to use legilimency on a wielder of the Darkness-he had thought the wizard had been replaced in someway. A Darkling had stayed in his mind for nearly two years, singing a song that had no end. Eventually once it had left Albus had been able to compartmentalize the memories, editing out the song, obliviating the pointless ones. It had only taken most of the sixties.

With the cheque passed over, Albus gave the man a postal service address with 'care of APWBD Holdings,' the muggle holding company he used when he had to deal with muggle finances. The postal service was used by muggle families to send packages to their children where they were then carried by owls to Hogwarts.

Harry yawned sleepily then slid out of bed, his bladder bursting. He made it to the bathroom just in time and let loose a torrent as he leaned forward, pressing his head against the wall and jutting his hips back.

This new morning issue he was having was very annoying, even if the dreams about actors like Monica Bellucci and Sophie Marceau were quite pleasant-those dreams seemed to be the issue, he decided. Every time he dreamt of the two-usually they were arguing over who got to kiss him, undressing as they did so-he had a very difficult time aiming at the toilet. He wished they had urinals like they had had in muggle school.

Done, he looked at his watch, a cheap mechanical that lost fifteen minutes a day. It said 5:57. He guessed it was probably fifteen after and decided a shower would be nice.

"You do know how to get rid of that, right?"

He spun, using his washcloth to cover himself as he stared at the Darkling that had invaded the shower.

"What? Wait-Get out!"

Annoyed, Harry went back to washing himself, paying a lot more attention to his groin than he used to.

Hermione thanked Hedwig for her letter then used a fork to feed the bird bacon, not wanting to touch the greasy meat. The owl went through nine slices before Ron and Neville sat down to join them, filling their plates up with the components of a fry up.

"Where's Harry?"

"Psyching himself up for his first game," Ron replied.

"I thought i'd make him a couple sandwiches," Neville told her. "He's too nervous to eat."

Harry snickered when he saw Malfoy walk into the great hall ahead of him. As soon as he stepped foot over the threshold of the room, the music began playing, ice covered the floor, and Malfoy and his bookends hit the floor, sliding around every table before slamming painfully into the end of the Slytherin table, their legs spread to maximize the damage.

Looks like the twins modified the ward, he thought as he walked outside, his broom in its cigaresque carrying case.

Inside the boy's side of the Gryffindor changing room he dressed quickly, wondering if the girls were changing as well, remembering his accidental viewing of them the last practice. Angelina had wrapped her towel around herself, winked at him then said, "come back when you're a fifth year and i'll give you a show. And more." He turned bright red as he stammered apologies and fled. The laughter of the girls followed him.

He flushed again as he remembered it, fighting down the terror afterwards. He had expected the three to prank him but instead they had just lightly teased him then all three kissed his cheek as he froze from being touched.

Wood gave his pep speech after a few minutes then stopped Harry as the first year moved out. "Get the snitch or die trying," he told the still dangerously impressionable child.

Harry swallowed the lump in his throat and nodded carefully.

The match had been going on for an hour with Gryffindor up 120 to Slytherin's 90 with Katie Bell sidelined due to head trauma from one of the Slytherin Beaters.

Harry pushed his broom harder, tired of the Slytherins lack of sportsmanship and aimed himself at the snitch, hiding next to the Slytherin keeper.

Harry leaned down, cutting down on wind resistance as he tried to line his foot up with the Keeper.

His two fold plan mostly worked. His hand clasped around the snitch and his boot slammed into the Slytherin's jaw, knocking him around roughly.

But harry's boot was caught and it forced him into a 3G turn that had him catch the hoop with his waist, sending him cartwheeling.

Professor McGonagall caught Harry by transfiguring a tree into a massive angled air mattress and Hooch was the first to arrive.

"Gryffindor wins!" Hooch called out after blowing her whistle then knelt down, checking him over more thoroughly than her original cursory examination as the Gryffindor team and the staff began surrounding him.

Harry awoke in the hospital wing and had a feeling he'd be doing so fairly often if he kept playing quidditch. He groped around then felt a Darkling's hand and his glasses were handed over. "Thanks," he muttered.

Then he saw the CUNGRADCHULAYSHUNZ banner two Darklings were holding on the ceiling and the dozens of get well soon scrolls and bags and bits of candies set up on a tray. The fleeting thought of quitting the mildly dangerous game was forgotten when he realized Hermione was napping on the chair next to his bed, a copy of Quidditch Injuries Through the Ages and a scroll with lists of 'interesting' injuries.

He looked at the scroll and chuckled aloud. She was ranking the injuries from one to seven. His had received a piddling three but some of he injuries were very impressive, he decided.

"Ah, you're up. She looked so pitiful i couldn't kick her out," the woman said, approaching. "It's almost eleven so i'll give you a once-over then a sleeping draught. You'll be free to leave for breakfast tomorrow, mr potter."

Once she nodded at his current status, the nurse woke hermione and since it was past curfew, sent her to change into pajamas then ensconced her in the bed next to the sleeping Harry.

"How come she let you stay?" He asked hermione when she awoke the next morning.

"I used the same expression i use on my dad when i really want a book," she admitted. "Dad said after we learned about magic that i probably ensorceled him but he loves me too much to drown me." She grinned at his snicker. They had bonded even more so over their complete love of Monty Python.

When the nurse finally pronounced that Harry could leave, the two headed down to the great hall, harry in clothes brought to him by one of the house-elves he presumed. His oversized clothing had been hemmed to fit him perfectly, his battered and taped up trainers resoled and remade from leather, the first night of school. He had long ago gotten used to them but he felt a lot better about having normal looking clothing and had been effusive in thanks to the house-elves a week later which had set them all to bawling in the honor of being thanked by Harry Potter.

As the two ate a hearty breakfast Ravenclaws and Hufflepuffs alike came up to the Gryffindor table to congratulate them as the Weasley twins joined them at the table. "Party tonight to celebrate your win."

"But you had one last night," hermione protested.

"That was the 'party for harry since he can't be here party.'"

Hermione rolled her eyes as harry snickered. "What was the butterscotch fizzy drink? It was really good." It had reminded him of the one time he had had a fizzy drink, Barq's rootbeer, but with an oilier feel to it and a buttery taste and smell that reminded him of butter on honey wheat bread.

"Butterbeer. They're a sickle and seven knuts for a sevenpack. Madam Rosmerta does them by owl order for an extra two knuts or older students can bring them back during Hogsmeade weekends."

Harry nodded and took out the coins for five sevenpacks.

Before he could say anything one of the twins wrote out a receipt and handed it over as the Headmaster approached their table.

"Mr. Potter. After dinner tonight please report to the staff room off the staff table."

Harry nodded. "Umm, why?"

Dumbledore smiled. "I believe this would be best served spoken of tonight."

Harry nodded, suddenly remembering the old wizard knew about the Darklings and was sure it was about them.

Done with breakfast, he turned to see the twins smirking. "So you're the prankster then?" They teased.

His eyes went wide and he whispered, "How did you find out‽"

The twins stared at him in shock. They had just been winding him up but his eyes and whispered confession with Hermione's groan at Harry falling for such a crude ploy told them the truth of it.

"How? You're an ickle first year that grew up muggle‽"

"Family magic?" He asked nervously. The Darklings were getting murderous due to his emotions and he thanked the world for the fact that the twins were feet away from any shadows.

Hermione grabbed the twins and tugged them aside, whispering in their ears. The two Weasley twins would look back at Harry before nodding occasionally.

After a few minutes they shook her hand then walked over. "It'll be a pleasure having you as an apprentice, harry."

Hermione rejoined the very bemused Harry. "What-what just happened?"

"They're gonna tell us more about the school and its secrets and you're gonna team up with them and teach each other stuff. And a discount on a pair of bags for them. I'm going to the library, coming?" She asked.