Author's Note: Hmm, apparently evil cliffhangers bring out the desperate in readers... :P

The Care and Keeping of Christmas Trees

Rule #10: Get the tree into the house

They stared at each other for another, very long moment, until she spoke again. "You ran out of gas?" she repeated, eyes widening in disbelief.

"No!"

Jerking himself back into awareness, he laughed. "I tried that with a girl once. It didn't work out like I hoped."

"You ran out of gas on purpose?"

"No, Bones, I pretended. So she'd get scared and I could be the hero. You know..."

Such an odd parade of emotions passed over his partner's face that he didn't know what to make of them. Starting with sadness and confusion (because no, she didn't know about boys trying to be heroes because that would have required boys to be interested in her in the first place), to disapproval of manipulation in general, moving on to curiosity and in the end she stopped at hopeful. "Are you doing that now?"

"Pretending to be out of gas? No."

Disappointment melded into dismay. "So we really are out of gas?

Booth frowned at her. He put the car into neutral and pushed his foot firmly down on the clutch while turning the key and when the engine purred again he turned an exasperated rebuke on his partner. "Of course I didn't run out of gas. Former Army Ranger, remember? What you said surprised me and my foot slipped off the clutch. That's all."

"Why?"

"Why what?" Confusion over her whys was an all-too-common occurrence.

"Why were you surprised by what I said?"

"Because it's not true and you always tell the truth."

It was one of those moments filled with potential, one where he left an opening and waited to see what she would do with it. Much to Booth's surprise, she revealed how true she thought it was when the shy girl who'd wanted a Smurfette from her Secret Santa peeked out at him behind her hesitant question. "Do you think I'm pretty?"

"No," he said, very softly. As her eyes fell away and pain flared, he quickly corrected her. "I think you're beautiful, Bones. And not just on the outside."

"You do?" Was that a blush staining her cheeks?

"Brainy Smurf, remember?"

She did remember what he'd said: she had her looks and a whole lot more. Her pleased smiled eased them both back into bantering for the last hour of their trip.

~Q~

One might think the quest to procure a Christmas tree would end upon reaching the front door. One would be wrong.

After a battle of epic proportions involving removal of said tree from the truck, shoving of said battered tree through doorways, into elevators (and out again), then up the back stairs, the partners had encountered their first taste of actual defeat at the front door. Booth and Brennan stared at each other across the bristling, bushy base of the tree, her accusation proving that she'd well earned the moniker of Brainy Smurf. "You've never done this before."

"Yes I have," he sputtered, defending his honor and his traditions that were now under a quite logical assault called the reality check.

Aggravated almost beyond endurance at this point, Brennan stomped a foot. Actually stomped. Then glared. "Clearly you have never attempted to bring a live Christmas tree into your apartment before, Booth, because if you did, you would know that this tree is too wide!"

If she weren't so annoyed, Brennan would have been amused to note the shifting of color tinging his ears an unusual shade of pink. Embarrassed pink, to be precise.

"It's a Booth family tradition to get a live tree, okay? Me, Pops, and Jared, we'd all go out and get a tree; then we'd decorate it while Gram would make us hot buttered rum." Now it was Booth's turn to take on the appearance of a shy boy, glancing downward in an effort to explain that she was right, but not really. "I miss that."

"Booth..." Little bits of what he'd said assembled themselves into notions of scattered family, forsaken tradition, and inclusion (hers, into his) that placed this day into an entirely new context. She looked down at blurry branches, surprised to be seeing the tree so clearly for the first time today. The thought that he was not pitying her but rather desiring her companionship in his reenactment of his own childhood reminiscence was all it took to transform a tree from a burden to a cause. Suddenly she found herself wishing there wasn't a damn tree standing in between herself and her partner, but it was, and thus Brennan found her annoyance and frustration sublimated into resolve to remove the obstacle at hand (or rather, at the door). Squaring her shoulders, she gestured for Booth to lift the tree and let her pass.

He did, asking, "Where are you going?"

A pause, while several different responses splashed through her thoughts. Finally she settled on Occam's Razor, the simplest explanation: She stood on tiptoe and pressed an affectionate kiss to his cheek, her eyes holding his when she dropped back and explained, "you brought me with you to help, right?" Then she dashed down the stairs.

Booth was still waiting by the tree when she got back with the bone saw, which he eyed with a resigned eye-roll of acceptance. Brennan set to work trimming branches that extended too far to fit through the door, passing the saw back to Booth so he could trim his side as well. A push, a shove, a burst of firry fury culminating in an explosion of needles ... but they were through. After so much fuss, at last the tree was ensconced inside his apartment.

"I'll get the stand," he volunteered.

Brennan stood facing the corner where the tree was destined, shaking her head at the already assembled jumble of damaged cardboard boxes containing treasures from Christmases past while her partner pawed through them enthusiastically. Finally he pulled out an ancient tin tree stand with a bowl and three bolts, waving it like a trophy. "Here we go!"

Good humor restored, Booth approached the trunk with the ring readied and promptly stumbled over their next hurdle. Brennan laughed and crossed her arms.

One might think the quest to procure a Christmas tree would end upon finding the tree stand. One would be wrong.

"It doesn't fit!"

~Q~

Author's Note: You didn't think they were out of the woods yet, did you...?