Let's try and start up a regular Wednesday update again, shall we? ^^; Sorry for my inconsistency, golly.

I hope you enjoy!

Seidou, Owl, took refuge in a factory building, full of only grey. He couldn't enter any of the shops. He couldn't enter any of the residential houses. He couldn't take it. He conjectured somewhere in his scattered thoughts that maybe he just couldn't stand the colors.

Thus, the factory—wide open… void of color… away from the everyday. Something like 'civilian life' was far beyond him nowadays.

'Nowadays.'

He almost laughed. Almost. To think, he'd only been here… how long? He didn't know. He couldn't piece together the time frame.

Mindlessly, he chewed on the arm of the military man. He didn't like his outfit. He didn't like his fire. I bet the system he's pledged allegiance to is fucked up, he thought bitterly. But really the fire bothered him most.

He tried to piece together some sort of meaning behind the fight he'd just had, but then he thought of Suzuya and decided he didn't really want to think too much on it. He sat in one of the corners on ground level, nestling himself there. All his focus was directed to the man in the military outfit. He decided he hated the man.

He seemed like… a good leader. He discarded the remains of the officer's arm, no more than bones and torn fabric. That part… that part is alright.

Closing his eyes, he hunched forward, curling with his knees close to his head and his tightly furled fingers pressed against his eyelids.

"I don't like it." It was a statement that he choked out quietly. No one heard him. No one was there to.

It was a feeling he was getting – a fiery feeling, something like poison that made his eyeballs burn in their sockets, made him feel as though he needed to rip open his ribcage just to feel like he could breathe.

It was an unpleasant feeling.

I'm not supposed to feel things like that anymore, he thought. I'm not supposed to feel anything at all. I'm done with that. I'm done with it. I'm done. It's done. It doesn't hurt anymore. It doesn't. It doesn't hurt. It doesn't, no, doesn't hurt, can't hurt can't feel pain no more not more no more don't hurt no more.

Yes, this wasn't right at all! He'd long since abandoned such things as pain, as loss, as 'regret.' Give back the empty night! Give back the blissful blanket of sweet despair! Take me back to where I'm comfortable…!

Someone had been following him: a ghost. He'd first seen the apparition in his fight with Kaneki, that was right… Upon the shriveling of his kakuja armor, upon waking up from blind blackout to some form of coherence, he'd seen him. Standing behind the wall of glass was the twenty-two-year-old image of an investigator with brown hair, his stature one of thick fear as he stared right back at the wraith now known as Seidou Takizawa. Owl. And Seidou knew, he knew that he was staring at himself – it was the old Seidou staring back at him. It was the Seidou Takizawa that he had killed—he shouldn't be following him around! He couldn't!

Because I already killed that son of a…

Loosening his hands over his eyes, he hooked his fingers at his lower eyelids and peered into the dark grey.

No one is here. No one else.

The dead man had been with the groups he just hit, too, yeah, hiding in the flames or standing beside Izaya Orihara. Guarding the good-smelling spirit girl with the military man.

Seidou's eyes flickered. There. There he was, sitting with his back against the old and inactive conveyor belt. He was wearing that old blue suit, torn and bloody. The jacket was missing. The brown hair that he'd parted down the middle was short and rather mussed, sticking out here and there as though he hadn't brushed it in some time. His brown eyes were staring back at the Owl, rather piercing despite the fact his image was one of transparency. They were wide orbs, the whites of them showing with the lower lids blackened with fatigue. He was the picture of weariness.

The half-ghoul was caught in his gaze, incapable of movement. His breath had left him. If it weren't for you… If you were gone, surely I wouldn't feel this way. I bet, I bet if I got rid of you then this would be fine and I would be fine and I could burn down all the memories of you, leave you charred into an ugly black so that I can't go back I won't go back I won't say sorry it wasn't me it's not my fault it isn't it's not…!

The apparition tilted his head slightly, brow creasing, mouth upturning in something reminiscent of sorrow. "…Scary," he commented, and the Owl flinched.

If you become what you're AFRAID of… FEAR will fade, he thought. I am fear's conductor. I am Fear. I am, I am, I am!

I feel no fear, no more, not at all! His mouth twitched. The thought occurred to him that there was no such thing as courage without fear, but he only answered such a musing with, Who needs courage when you're fearless?

He remembered how the fear had consumed him; how it ran through his veins and ate him from the inside out. Through that fear he had emerged as the monster he was now, emerged wrapped in darkness. Through that fear he had sold his soul out of desperation. Through that fear he had brought peace to that poor bastard named Seidou Takizawa through his own murder.

"…Ah," began the apparition, and the Owl twitched. The transparent figure was bowing his head. "I can't… wake up."

"Go away," the Owl said flatly. "You shouldn't be here… You're dead. I killed you."

Drily, the apparition laughed a pained chuckle that only served to anger the Owl.

"I'll kill you again if I have to," he growled, and the ghost quieted. "I will. I will! I'll kill you as many times as I need! DON'T MOCK ME!"

The half-ghoul flew into a rampage, tearing apart the inside of the empty factory, ripping apart machinery and railings and shelves and the like until at last he could rest in the rubble for the last remaining hours of the night.

Roppi sat outside one of the smaller buildings in the southern part of the city, looking out into the night with introspective red eyes. Konoha had brought up just about every food place they passed, so at last Roppi had caved and told him to just get something already so that they could get moving without distractions. The eastern sky was beginning to just barely glow, and he thought, It's almost dawn.

Granted, he knew he should probably rest up at some point. He was beginning to feel the dull ache of exhaustion now that he was sitting still. Sighing, he got to his feet, preparing to pace back and forth until Konoha made it back out. "Don't wanna sleep," he mumbled to himself, rubbing at his arm restlessly. No, he couldn't rest knowing that he was leaving Kaneki and Seidou in the waking world… not as they were. It's my mess. I'll fix it. I'll fix what I've done.

He sighed heavily, pressing the palm of his good hand to his eyelid. The hand that had been pierced by Izaya was throbbing dully, like some sort of tired alarm trying to constantly remind him that there was something wrong with it. As if he didn't know by now. It was great being able to use both arms, though, and pain was something he was accustomed to anyway. No point in complaining about it now, he thought flatly.

Ah, he said he wanted to fix everything, but what worth were his words until he actually accomplished something? I hate broken promises, he thought bitterly, and felt something knotting up inside, the gnarled roots of his negativity threatening to pierce and leech off of his newfound determination.

I'll fix it. I'll bring them back, just like Shintaro brought me back.

"Easier said than done," he breathed, and leaned against the wall of the building, closing his eyes. If I don't succeed, I have no right to return to the others. I shouldn't have dragged Konoha into this mess… He shouldn't have to deal with it.

…Speaking of which, how long is that android going to take just to grab some food? He brought a hand to his face, this time out of annoyance. He began to retreat further into himself, swept up in his own thoughts. Ah, hurry up…

"Waiting for Konoha?" A voice out of nowhere.

Roppi jerked in surprise, eyes flashing as he went into immediate fighting stance. Who?

Before him was a teen gal that looked to be just a bit younger than him. Half of her violet-haired head was shaved to mere fuzz, the other half swept to the side to cover her right eye.

"Who the fuck are you?" he asked, tone taut. He heard his own heartbeat. His machine gun was at the bench just a few paces to his left. If he could just reach it…! Where's that stupid android when you need him?!

"Roppi, calm down," said the unidentified one, wringing her wrists uncomfortably. A baggy grey hoodie adorned her torso, the fabric ripped in a few scattered places. She stepped forward, black boots sounding oddly heavy on the concrete. She sported worn black skinny jeans.

"Like hell I'll calm down," he said, eyes wide and quivering. Something was very wrong with this. The atmosphere had shifted drastically in just a moment. How did she sneak up on me like that? Is she one of the new female gamers? Is she some other weird species I don't know? He felt his skin crawl under her gaze, and he couldn't even tell why. Her eyes peered into his core; he could feel it. It was terrifying. He, like Izaya, was someone who read other people, not the other way around.

"Roppi," she repeated, a note of sadness in her voice.

She acts like I'm supposed to listen to her.

She took another step, and he bolted to the side, freeing himself from his frozen state and going straight for the machine gun.

"Konoha! Get your ass out here!" he called, and reached for his weapon only to have her hand swipe at his. The next moment, he found himself with his back to the wall, her hand pressed firmly to his mouth.

"He won't come until we're done," she said lowly. "That's how this works."

His red eyes were filled with a mix of anger, shock, and frustration. What the fuck is this? No doubt, she's insanely fast…

"You can't escape me," she smiled, a teasing spark in her all-seeing eyes. "Maybe you can accept me, but you can never get away."

One of my arms is still free, maybe if… the blade…?

"You don't want to stab me with that," she warned, then broke up into a spell of hysterical giggling. "No, no, don't wanna do that."

…What the fuck…

"Didn't Aureus tell you?"

Aureus? His gut was screaming at him to get away or kick her ass. A game master…?

"Yeah, that's right. I'm a game master," she agreed.

Can she read my mind? Because I swear to god…

"I can," she confirmed. "Now, if I let go of you, will you stay put and stay quiet? You don't want to cut me with the Harrowing Blade… You don't want to kill me, because I'm one of the game masters against the game. I'm trying to help you. Okay? I know you don't want help, but that means you need it more. Right?"

Angrily, he shoved her hand from his mouth, taking a gasp of air and snapping in growling tones, "How the fuck are you expected to help me?"

"I'm not expected to," she answered easily. "I just want to… And in fact, Muse is probably going to kind of annoyed with me for doing this," she added with a sly grin. "Oh well!~"

Muse… that's the one that Aureus said…

"…Was your target; that's right," she nodded, then held out her hand. "I'm Seraph." An oddly sad, gentle smile crossed her features. "It's nice to… finally meet you."

He squinted suspiciously at her hand, then took it, very cautious. "Um… Roppi," he uttered.

"I know," Seraph chirped, and he twitched. "We have to be a little quick, because I don't want Muse or anyone stopping me right before I do what I'm trying to."

"What… are you trying to do?" he asked tentatively, wishing to back up but realizing the wall was at his back.

"I'll explain," she said shortly. "That Harrowing Blade… you've cut Light and Kaneki with it." Roppi refrained from flinching, his jaw set. "There's a way to reverse its effects." His crimson eyes widened, and she took him by the shoulders. Her hands weighed on him like stones. "I want Kaneki to be okay, too… And the fact that you've come as far as you have… I want to help you out a little bit. The way things are going, the reverse effect is likely to be demonstrated to you in the near future. I think that Kaneki's Harrowed blood will be purified before you can reach him. That's fine. It doesn't have to be your responsibility… Just, find him. Bring him back to your groups. Okay?"

Roppi nodded numbly. Is that really something… that…?

"You just need to know that you can be there for him, okay, Roppi?" Seraph tilted her head, smiling sheepishly. "Even though you're used to being the one in the low… it doesn't mean that you can't help others once you've found your footing. Understand? If he is purified… when he is purified… knowing Kaneki, he'll beat himself up about it. What you do will either make him or break him… Don't worry," she said in answer to his horrified look, "…you won't be the only one."

"But I'm an asshole," he shot back, his tone raised in something close to hysteria. "If he depends on my comfort, what if I fuck up? Huh? I've done nothing but fuck up this whole time!"

"You've come some way, I think," she said quietly, closing her eyes. "It will be the test you wanted… so that you can learn to love yourself; feel like you deserve it. Feel like you're worth saving – which you are… What you do on that path is something that you need to choose, but…" She beamed warmly at him. "I think you can make the right choice."

"I… I don't know that I…"

"Kaneki isn't the only one you're after, of course," Seraph continued, holding up a slim finger. "There's also Seidou. Ah…" She paused, looking down. "Seidou's sweet," she murmured, and Roppi's brow furrowed in a mix of shame, regret, and grief. "The way he is now… yeah, you can save him. I should have every ability to help him, too." She looked at her hands. "He's had a few chances now. But every time, Muse vetoes me. Muse and Durden both… they won't let him get better. He can't get better so long as they don't want him to." She looked at Roppi with narrowed eyes, gaze intense. "That isn't fair. But things need to get worse before they get better, right? You know that, too… So listen. They've got him in a set path towards his own personal hell. But they can't stop an already-set-up rule that they've put in place, and I want you to send it back at them. If it doesn't work, then it's not your fault… At that point it's out of your hands, and… if Seidou chooses wrong, then his sins will come crashing down on him."

"What—kind of game is this?" Roppi questioned her. She laughed happily.

"It's the Emina Games, that's all… Entertainment. A game. That's it. I can't go any further than that." He continued to stare at her with all his skepticism, and she sighed. "That Harrowing Blade that Aureus gave you… it draws out the worst in someone when you draw their blood. When that happens, there is one thing that can break its effects… I'm not allowed to tell you straight out what it is, unfortunately, but if you can figure that out… If Seidou, for example, were to be Harrowed and then purified… the game masters would no longer be able to hold Seidou to the fate they have set for him. They couldn't justify that anymore. At that point, it would be all Seidou's decisions… and that's the way it should be."

"So you're saying that I can reverse the effects of the Harrowing Blade," he said flatly.

"Yes."

"But you can't tell me how."

"…Yes."

"And you want me to stab Seidou with this thing… when he already seems to be pretty fucking bad right now, seeing as he's going around eating dead bodies and attacking people at random!"

Seraph bit her lip, pausing. She then shrugged apologetically with a weak smile. "It… gets worse before it gets better?"

Roppi scoffed.

"I'm hoping you can catch a hint on the cure if Kaneki is purified… Greyson and Rainbow are the ones that veto the Harrowing Blade's effects. They represent something very important…"

"I'm betting you can't tell me what, though," he said dully.

"Um, yeah, you're right."

"Great." He sighed sharply.

"Ah!" She'd seemed to have had a burst of enlightenment. Roppi looked at her again. "Aureus told you about the whole symbolism thing, right?"

"Symbolism?" he repeated. He kept bringing it up, but…

"What a boob," she huffed, rolling her eyes. "Aureus represents symbolism. Yeah."

"Aureus… is symbolism," he reiterated skeptically, brow furrowed.

"Yeah, he's kinda weird, but none of us are really not weird," Seraph shrugged. "All of us are unique!" she cried in delight, then spun around on the heel of her boot, throwing her hand into the air gracefully as she laughed like a child.

Roppi decided to ignore the little twirl. "If he's symbolism… then what are you?"

"Hm? I guess I can tell you that," she said, putting a finger to her lips and leaning towards him. "I'm really not all that important… well… actually, I kinda am."

He drew his lips into a thin line.

She closed her eyes, straightening back up and spreading her arms in presentation. "I am depth. Each backstory, however cruel or naïve, is there for a reason. It makes you real. I am character development. Without me, you and everyone else… you would all be flat. Generic. Just a doodle on a page. No connection. No reason." Her eyes opened again, expression apologetic. "Roppi, without me, you wouldn't have a past. I know it's not a pleasant one… but—"

"You're telling me that you're the reason my mother was the way she was," Roppi said, tone strained.

"…But if it weren't for that past… you would be solely bitterness. No breakthrough. No progression. Just bitter – poison to the bone. That, or…" She paused. Then, "Roppi, I came to you now because I think you're close enough to accepting that past," she pressed, brow furrowed in empathy. He quieted, swallowing uncomfortably. "I know it sucks – trust me, I know it does… But if you were bitter for no reason at all, wouldn't that be worse? Because… giving you a past… gives you hope for the future."

Hope? He thought to himself that such a word was one he hadn't used often in his time being alive. He'd been convinced it didn't exist, though every so often he thought he saw a glimmer of it… with Tsuki at his side…

A sharp pang of loss hit him, and he bit his cheek to maintain monotonous irritation.

That was when Seraph hugged him – he tried to jerk away, but found that her embrace wrapped around and around, into his chest, into his head. He was frozen in place, his spirit held captive in Seraph's desperate attempt to reach out to him.

"I know you don't know me, but I know you," she murmured, and it was as though time had overlapped itself: Seraph was embracing someone no more than a child, yet to know the taste of bitter despair. Yes, in her arms was the child that Roppi was no more, a person left behind, forgotten in the folds of memory. "I know Tsuki is gone. I'm sorry… I didn't want anyone dragged into this. I don't want you here. I don't want A-ya here. I don't want Suzuya here. I don't want Hide here… I'm tired of this game. I—can't do it anymore. Though… I, am glad to have seen you."

"But—why?" he got out. Roppi didn't know whether to panic or relax. He felt vulnerable. Exposed.

"…Why am I glad to see you?"

"Ah—yeah."

"Well, I know you pretty well, Roppi." She pulled away, and he felt at last as though he could breathe again. The moment ended, and Seraph stood before the struggling nineteen-year-old that Roppi was now. He felt as though she just gave a hug not to his body, but his soul. It was a very creepy feeling. His skin was crawling again, even though admittedly he felt rather cold upon her leave. Her hands still gripped his shoulders tightly, heavy like the weight of his regret. "And I like the person you are," she smiled. "I like the person you could be."

"Which one?" he snipped, tense, and she pursed her lips in disapproval.

"The best one. The best of you."

"And what of the worst of me?"

She shrugged. "Everyone has a bad part. And all of us are just gonna think that our own bad part's worse than the next person."

Roppi blinked at her, brow creased. "And what if I told you that I don't want to deal with my past? What if I told you I'm not ready to 'accept' it? What I told you that I'll never 'accept' it, because life sucks and it wasn't fair? What if I told you that I hate you for giving me this bullshit? Huh?"

Her hands released him, much to his relief and regret. Seraph bowed her head. "Well… people want to do that all the time, right?" she asked lowly. "So many people… hate me for that reason. So many don't want to look at me. Don't want to…" She looked at him with those vaguely despairing eyes again. "I just want to be looked at… You know?"

He gazed back, unable to keep that fire he had moments ago. He thought of his mother's hazy eyes, peering at him without any trace of sobriety. As though they didn't recognize him, not quite. Suddenly he felt as though the hug she'd given him was to the Roppi of yesterday, yes, the child that knew not true affection.

"…I—know," he answered, discomfort thick in his lungs.

"And even if you were to hate me… Hah." Her tone lowered, and she took a step back. "I'd just laugh it off like always. Like a lot of the people in this stupid game do. But in the end, I already said… you can't escape me. You can't get rid of me. You can reject me, but you'll never get away!" Her tone was rising in tension. "But—ah…" She deflated, stretching her fingers apart as she relaxed. "…That's not the way to do things, or you end up falling apart. I learned that." And she laughed heartily.

Roppi stared, speechless.

"That's all I can really give you right now, though, Roppi," she said apologetically. "Konoha will come back out soon… Heh. I love him, too. I hope you do well… no, I know you will." Seraph smiled warmly at him, and Roppi thought to himself that such a smile was one that only Tsuki would give him. Suddenly he felt his chest threatening to collapse under the heaviness of his longing. He opened his mouth, but had nothing to say. "Good luck, Roppi," she murmured, and began backing up, clasping her hands behind her back.

"Ah… wait—" he began, and the sound of the building's opening door cut him off. Roppi turned to see Konoha, carrying an abundance of food that nearly went over his android head. His brow furrowed in question, but then he jerked his head to look at where Seraph had been. What was before him was only sidewalk and an empty street. …She's gone, he thought, unsure how to feel about the whole encounter.

"I got food…" Konoha tilted his head around the pile of food to look at Roppi, who frowned deeply at him.

"Why did you grab that much food, Konoha?" he asked dully.

"I thought I'd grab some for you, too," he answered quietly, expressionless as always. His head tilted further. "Half of it is yours."

The bitter one ran a hand through his hair, annoyed. "I don't need that much, Konoha."

"Ah, but we can eat together, right?"

"I'm not hungry…"

"But food tastes better when you share it with friends," Konoha insisted, and Roppi looked to the ground. "Will you… really not share?"

"I'll take a fucking sandwich, okay?" he grumbled, crossing his arms and sitting on the bench where his machine gun rested.

Konoha lit up, giving a gentle smile as he sat down. "I am glad that we are able to eat together as friends," he commented as he spread out the food in front of them, taking a pre-made sub he'd found in the deli section while Roppi started on some strawberries, if grudgingly.

The dark one grunted noncommittally, his gaze distant. Friends, huh? he thought, and closed his eyes. …These strawberries… are pretty good.