This is another short chapter. I was conflicted about where to go with my story after Rafferty's suspension. I was tempted not to write it in at all, but I think that in the long run (after she's back) it will be easier to include it. This is a lot of text and emotion and not a lot of conversation. I know some of you hate that and I apologise. I feel it's necessary to let the readers know where these girls are coming from inside their own heads. Please read and review. I love all of your feedback. Thanks so much for all of the support thus far. I'm really beginning to think that Shafferty is going to canon-happen and that's much more likely if we're all very invested in it. Thanks y'all. Enjoy.

10.

So... Rafferty was suspended. The moment that Shay walked into the locker room to find the girl dressed in a sweater and jeans, she knew something was up. But in classic Leslie Shay style, she assumed the worst. A three-month suspension was actually good news to Shay in comparison to any more permanent action being taken.

"I've spent the last six months trying to bring my fiance back from the grave. I need some time."

Shay wondered since the moment that they were on that fateful call with their 'devout friend' Jacob if Rafferty was doing this intentionally. At those words, she knew she had her answer and she felt at least partially to blame. She wasn't trying to be selfish; she knew that Rafferty had been through so much long before she knew her and that the woman had a lot of things to deal with. But just two night ago she and Rafferty were snuggling and whispering in each others ear at Molly's. Sure- it was just pretend. Except it wasn't. And Shay was pretty sure that they both knew that.

At start of shift today she and Rafferty were back to normal; they had both somehow succeeded in not letting it get weird between them and acting like it had never happened. So maybe Rafferty didn't let their elbows touch when they sat in the common room like they normally would. And maybe she didn't allow herself to hold Shay's gaze after they had made eye contact for as long as she would have three days ago. But Shay should have expected all of that.

When Rafferty saw Jacob nodding in approval for treatment and Shay knew for a fact that he hadn't, she couldn't help but wonder if this was all her fault. They had gotten too close too quickly and now Rafferty was willing to do anything she needed to (including something as drastic as getting herself suspended for three months) in order to distance herself from the situation. To distance herself from Leslie Shay.

Shay was too realistic to assume that Rafferty would fall in love with her and that they'd live happily ever after, but they were in the process of building an undeniable something that she hoped Rafferty also felt. Now she knew that Rafferty felt it- only the other woman was running from it as fast as she could. Again, Shay shouldn't have been surprised.

"So... what are you going to do for three months?" Shay asked, acting casual although her heart was caught in her throat at the thought of never having the feeling of Allison near her again.

"I'm just going to try to get myself together. Take a break. Learn to be 'me' again, you know?" Rafferty told her honestly, leaning against her locker nearer to Shay.

Shay nodded, fully understanding that Allison needed this. "Will I- will I still see you?" her voice came out sounding like the saddest little puppy despite her efforts to keep her emotions in check.

"Do you want to still see me?"

As soon as the question left Rafferty's lips she regretted it. It implied that she had been thinking way too much about the situation and that she worried that Shay would be happy or relieved for her departure.

"Of course I still want to see you! Are you crazy?" Shay had somehow left that whole 'emotions in check' thing far behind.

Rafferty shrugged but smiled at Shay's genuine response.

"Come to Molly's tonight," Shay said suddenly, as though the thought had just occurred to her (it had). "Hockey raffle."

Rafferty scrunched up her face in question. "Aahh, Molly's might have seen enough of me for a while," she chuckled nervously, remembering her last visit there.

"Never," Shay smiled softly.

"Okay..." Rafferty agreed, acting reluctant. "But I'm not gonna go out drinking with you all the time for my three months off," she laughed.

"Of course not," Shay smiled. "We'll stay in and drink sometimes, too," she smirked, causing Rafferty to laugh hard. "Okay, well, I'm gonna give you a hug now," she added, opening her arms in waiting.

"Meh," Rafferty tilted her head as if to say, 'Do you have to?' but she walked into Shay's arms anything but reluctantly and held the girl close.

Shay was reminded of the first hug they had shared. Despite it's warmth, and the obvious beginning of something, Shay could still feel all of the walls that Rafferty kept up around herself. Those walls seemed to be non-existent now.

"I'll pick you up at seven?" Shay asked as they each stepped slowly out of the embrace.

"Oh, you'll pick me up?" Rafferty scoffed with a grin.

"Yes, I will. It's what gentlemen do," Shay flashed a charming smile and Rafferty pushed her shoulder but couldn't help but sincerely smile back.

"I'll see you at seven."