000
Against My Nature
Newt/Harry, Timetravel Shenanigans, Canon Divergent
His plan was to avoid changing the timeline. He knew he wouldn't be able to resist if the opportunity presented itself. So he fled to Africa, where opportunity found him instead.
000
Chapter Ten
He wasn't able to sneak away again. Harry woke up in Newt's bedroll, half pinned under the still sleeping man that morning. They were both clothed, it being far too cold to get undressed even when in bed. Newt had fairly kissed him into submission the night before, managing to coax him out of his backpack and coat, and into his bedroll without Harry even able to muster up the energy to resist. They didn't do anything, something for which Harry could only be grateful as he blinked up at the misty sky above him.
Attempting to slip away in the early hours of the morning was impossible as well. As soon as Harry worked up the determination to continue with his original plan of action, to slip away and go into hiding, as soon as he moved, shifting ever so carefully in order to eel out of the Hufflepuff's clinging grasp, Newt was awake, and firmly pulling him back, not about to let him escape in the slightest, or forget what was said the previous evening.
And the worst part was that he was so fucking gentle about it. And Harry didn't know how to handle that. Part of him wanted to get away, bolt for the hills without looking back; the other part didn't know what it wanted, but it didn't want to leave.
It took Harry's stomach growling very loudly before the Hufflepuff let him out of arms reach, but even then he watched him like a hawk as he rummaged his travelling kettle out of his backpack and began to make the both of them a cup of tea. Harry just huddled in their blankets, miserable, confused, and trying to adjust to this new change.
He – didn't know what to do anymore.
000
Harry had been quiet and subdued all day.
It made Newt feel absolutely wretched to think that he was responsible for it. After managing to get a cup of tea into the auror, he had begun to make up some breakfast for them out of the trail rations he had stored, porridge to warm them up, and a few fruits to give it flavour.
He was almost tempted to make Harry ride with him on his camel, just to keep him close, but the way the Gryffindor shied away from him had the thought dying before he gave it more than cursory consideration. He knew from experience that if you wanted anything from a Gryffindor when they were being stubborn you had to push for it, that it wasn't so much respect you needed, but rather the proof you weren't going to take no for an answer, that you would try come hell or high water. Hufflepuffs gave their trust easily, and once you had their loyalty they stuck with you thick or thin. Gryffindors... You had to earn their loyalty. Newt knew that, but he also knew that the loyalty of a Gryffindor was even more ferocious than their House Mascot. He had seen Charlus, heavily wounded, rip apart a cadre of Dark Wizards when Theseus went down, and the Potter stepped in front of him – he hadn't supposed to see it, he'd gone nosing in his brother's room when he noticed him behaving strangely, and found his Penseive. Newt hadn't known that Theseus had his own demons from the Great War.
But he worried. Had he pushed too hard in the wrong way with Harry? He was in some ways a quintessential Gryffindor, in others, he reminded Newt almost of a Slytherin in the way he would just roll with the punches and adjust himself, to adapt. A Gryffindor would rail, shout, and fight against poor circumstances, a Slytherin took what was handed to them and made the best of what they had.
He didn't know what to do.
Dragging a hand through his damp hair, Newt glanced over his shoulder to where the Gryffindor was trailing behind him on his camel, once again bundled up in his thick puffy jacket. They were getting higher on the plains now, the mist was heavier than ever, more akin to actual clouds, and just as wet. The world was curiously muffled, and eerily silent with only the sounds of their mount's hoof falls crunching on the stony path.
Newt sighed, he couldn't exactly back-peddle now, he knew that much. If he did, that would be it, door closed, no chance. He would tone down the aggression, but he definitely wasn't going to stop. He liked kissing Harry, liked touching him, and hugging him. Didn't want to stop really.
Harry just... Newt wasn't stupid, or deaf. None of those xiezhi had attacked the auror when he said he shouldn't exist, that they were never supposed to meet. Then there was what he said before Newt kissed him. He called himself 'Potter', not Peverell. He had given Newt a fake name? Why? Well, he could guess, but if he'd lied about his name, what else had he lied about? Clearly this wasn't some kind of ploy to get at his brother, or really anything to even do with Newt if the fact they weren't supposed to have met was any indication. But, just what was Harry running from if he 'wasn't supposed to exist'? Not supposed to exist, Potter... Was... Was he Harold's bastard? Harry was too old to be from Charlus, but Harold was well into his fifties and already had a son, Fleamont. It wasn't out of the realm of possibility. Harold had not married out of love, very few people did, love came later after years of marriage and friendship. A marriage that would have been ruined if a bastard had been discovered. Did that mean Peverell was his mother's name? But... If he had gone by Peverell for most of his life, why would he unconsciously use 'Potter' in private when chastising himself? Or did he go by Potter personally but use Peverell to avoid discovery, and thus shame?
It would make sense... If that were the truth...
But Newt didn't think it was. Harold was a stern man, but he was NOT heartless. If he had fathered a bastard, then he would do the right thing by the child and adopt it into the family, no matter what his wife had to say on the matter. A child was a gift, and the Potters adhered to that belief with both hands. Harry being a bastard was a possibility, but an unlikely one.
Newt nibbled his bottom lip as they trundled between two grassy hills slick with misty dew. There was a crescent cut into one of the hills, a neat almost bite out of the grass that was slightly raised between two sets of stone pillars covered in bird etchings. It made too good of a campsite to be ignored, especially with this mist, Newt wasn't too keen on continuing just in case they ended up lost, or worse, going off a cliff by accident.
As for Harry... He glanced over his shoulder as the young man slid from his mount's shoulder. He was just going to have to keep doing what he was doing. He'd gotten through to him, a little.
Baby steps, Newt, baby steps.
Just like when he tamed that feral crup as a child. One step at a time.
000
Harry slept on the otherside of the camels to Newt, quite stubbornly so. In retaliation, Newt kept the bags on his side, just in case. Harry let him. He'd been thinking hard the whole ride up the mountain, he wasn't going to need his bag. He waited until he was certain Newt was sleeping before getting up. He wasn't even surprised that his shoes had been stolen, he left them, and his coat.
Even though he still had his auror robe on, it was freezing in the cold black of night. The mist had finally drifted away leaving nothing but frigid open skies carpeted by jewel-like stars.
Harry had never seen so many of them before in his life as he slowly climbed the mountain on his own.
He'd seen it the day before, seen the way the path curved up towards it. At the time he'd made a mental note of it because it would have been dangerous, now he made his way there for that very reason.
He couldn't continue like this. He really, honestly, couldn't. He shouldn't have even tried to begin with, that was his first mistake. Still, he hadn't completely ruined things, not yet. There was still a chance, slim as it was, for him to fix this whole thing. As last night had proven, Harry did not have the will to memory charm someone he actually cared about, he wasn't strong like Hermione. He couldn't do that. He tried, but the words just wouldn't come. They sat heavy and bitter on his tongue, until he gave up. And the Hufflepuff pounced. Harry flushed, his cheeks stinging painfully in the cold. Where the hell did he learn to kiss like that? For someone who had supposedly never been with anyone before his wife got her claws into him, he was annoyingly good at kissing. And since Harry could not remove Newt's memory of him, and the Hufflepuff wasn't exactly willing to let Harry remove himself from his presence, this was the only avenue left that he could think of.
Harry sighed deeply, rubbing his arms as he came to a stop, and peered down.
He couldn't actually see the bottom in the dark, which he supposed was good. Given the terrain, it would likely be sharp rocks. So it wouldn't take long.
He wasn't supposed to exist here, so the simple answer would be to remove his existence. It wasn't like he feared death or anything, it was just the next step. And, hell, no one would actually miss him, would they?
Newt would be upset, but, it had been three months since they first met, a month and a half of which was spent nursing him while he vomited all over the man's shoes. He would get over it.
Harry chuckled under his breath, he would probably be glad to see the back of him once he'd finished whatever mourning period he thought was appropriate. Harry hadn't exactly been the easiest of people to travel or get along with in all honesty, too modern, too jagged from the war with Voldemort, too secretive and damaged. It really was for the best that he left the man to his travelling. Hell, if Harry got lucky, his body would never be found and Newt would think he'd just run off, and spend his time being angry instead of upset. That'd actually work out better. That was probably what happened, thinking about it. Newt hadn't shown any sign of recognition at Luna's wedding, hadn't acted strangely, nor angry. He was quite clearly in love with his wife, who loved him also. So Harry was fairly certain his plan would work.
He ran a hand through his hair, idly wondering who would be waiting for him this time. It wasn't like he actually knew anyone from this timeline. All the people he cared about were alive, or hadn't even been born yet.
He smiled, he would just have to be the one to meet them when they died then. He would be able to reassure his parents that he grew up okay, that he loved them. Apologise to Sirius for getting him killed, and then tell him all about how Molly kicked Bellatrix's ass up and down the Great Hall, tell Remus and Tonks all about Teddy and what a bundle of energy he was. Assure Fred that the jokeshop was going well, and that George got better even though he was never quite the same. High-five Lavender for blasting Fenrir Greyback into paste in her final moments. Thump Colin for being such an idiot, before hugging the stuffing out of him, the stupid self-sacrifical boy. Dobby, Merlin, he would be able to apologise to Dobby, and Hedwig, his beautiful Hedwig. It would be nice to see her again.
He took a step back, and then jumped -
"ACCIO!"
Harry wheezed as the summoning charm yanked him backwards in mid-air.
He had a split second to feel an arm go around him before it slammed him into the gravel path, hard enough to wind him.
"WHAT IN BLUE BLAZES DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING?!" Newt roared pinning him down, angrier than Harry had ever seen him. Angrier, and terrified. He was shaking violently straddling Harry's stomach, both hands fisted in the collar of his robes. "WHAT IN MERLIN'S NAME SEIZED YOU TO THROW YOURSELF OFF A CLIFF?! WERE YOU TRYING TO KILL YOURSELF?! WELL?! ANSWER ME!"
Harry wheezed, winded, struggling to drag some air in as Newt shook him hard enough to bang his head off the stone path.
"JUST WHAT IS KILLING YOURSELF GOING TO ACCOMPLISH?! IS MY PRESENCE SO CONTEMPTABLE THAT THIS IS WHAT YOU'VE BEEN DRIVEN TO?! SAY SOMETHING, DAMN YOU!"
His head bounced off a particularly sharp rock making him yelp in pain, and the next thing Harry knew he was being kissed within an inch of his life. There was nothing gentle or coaxing about it this time. He squirmed and tried to push away, only for the Hufflepuff to snarl at him, and bite down on his lip, fingers knotting in his hair and pulling. Harry tilted his head with a hiss of pain that turned into a gasped squawk when the Hufflepuff abandoned his mouth to bite down on his neck. He was not gentle. And Harry went still, fingers flexing spasmodically on the stone path, bare-feet digging into the mud as he fought every instinct he had to attack and shove the mythozoologist off him. He grit his teeth, and squeezed his eyes shut as Newt's teeth dug down a little harder making it difficult to breathe.
The teeth let go, and Harry breathed shakily as kisses peppered his throat, and the grip on his hair loosened.
Newt buried his face into the crook of his neck, and Harry could feel something wet on his skin that definitely wasn't saliva. "What were you thinking? Why?" he asked hoarsely, voice breaking as Harry huffed shaky breaths beneath him. "What did I do wrong?"
Harry squeezed his eyes shut at the broken tremulous question.
"Nothing," he rasped, "You've done nothing wrong, I promise," he choked out, one hand coming up to cradle the back of the Hufflepuff's head. "I just couldn't... risk destroying everything... I'm sorry, it really isn't you, I promise," he vowed, leaning his head to one side, pressing it against Newt's curly hair tightly.
His other hand dug into his pocket.
The Hufflepuff sat up, angry again, "Then what – " he fell silent as Harry held his auror I.D. out to him.
000
Name: Harry James Potter
Office: Auror
Department: Department of Magical Law Enforcement
No: 01876
Date of Issue: 30/09/1997
Date of Birth: 31/07/1980
Sex: Male
Eyes: Green
Hair: Black
Height: 5'3"
Blood status: Pureblood
House: Gryffindor
Distinguishing Marks: Lightning bolt scarx2 (forehead, chest), scarring-multiple ( , oval beneath collar bones, elbow-wrist, 'I must not tell lies' back of , multiple , circular )
Wand Core: Phoenix feather
Wand Length: 11"
Wand Wood: Holly
This is to certify that the holder of this permit is authorised for multiple wand usage and carry.
Address: Smallest room, second floor, 93 Diagon Alley, London, England.
Newt stared at the small magically reinforced I.D. card, at the image of Harry in his official auror uniform, glasses that Newt had never once seen him wear perched on his nose, several pips in his collar indicating that he was a top auror, The top auror, Captain, next in line to be Head of the Department.
He looked young in the picture. Young like he had when he first met him.
Newt stared down at the man under him in confusion. Despite the darkness, it was easy to see the differences. Harry looked tired, he looked defeated. And now Newt knew why. Staring him clear in the face, in black and white.
"Nineteen eighty," he echoed dully.
Harry nodded silently as he slowly pushed himself back, and then up. Newt shifting only a little as he ended up sat in the auror's lap, hand strangely steady on the little card in his hand even though it felt like the bottom of the world had just been torn out from beneath him. Everything he thought he knew about this man was... wrong. So wrong.
"When you said you weren't supposed to exist..." he croaked.
Harry nodded again, "Not for another fifty-five years, at least," he agreed slowly. "I met you, before," he admitted quietly, making Newt pause, "Your grandson's wedding. He was getting married to my bestfriend. You cornered me at the drinks table at the reception to ask me about being a Parselmouth. You asked exactly the same questions your grandson did the first time he met me. Your wife and I ended up making friends at the next gathering. I didn't realise who you were when we first met. If I'd known..." he trailed off, his expression conflicted and Newt felt a cold hand grip his insides as it really began to hit home just what Harry had been struggling with over the last couple of weeks. Why he had been so stubborn in holding him at arms-length.
The Gryffindor shrugged then, "That's why I have to do this. I'm far back enough that any changes I make could ripple and completely destroy everything I've ever fought for, everyone I've ever loved. And I can't risk that, Newt. I can't." He smiled softly at him even as he managed to pull himself out from under the Hufflepuff completely, and get to his feet, "It's not like I'm scared of dying. Done it before. It's just like catching a train," he said easily and Newt wanted to throw up.
"You – "
Harry leaned down, cradling his head in one arm, and kissed his temple, "Do you want me to memory charm you? I can make it so we never even met, if you want," he offered kindly.
Newt inhaled sharply, and grabbed his arm, shaking his head. "No, Harry – you can't! You – no, no no no! No! How can you be so happy – no! You can't! You're not just going to – this isn't like going on holiday!" he protested desperately, scrambling to his feet, gripping the Gryffindor's shoulders and shaking him a little, not even caring as his eyes began to burn again.
"Please just – just – don't, don't jump, please," he begged, banding his arms around the Gryffindor tightly, breath stuttering in his chest as his heart lodged itself firmly in his throat. "There has to be another way, there has to. Don't – please don't – I don't think I could – I wouldn't be able to forgive myself," he whispered.
He heard Harry sigh, and felt the awkward but gentle pat on his back, "You will. It worked out alright in the end. You didn't even – well, you certainly didn't recognise me at the wedding. I really do think it's for the best if I memory charm you."
Newt shook his head, tightening his grip. "No. I don't – I don't want to forget you. I – I'll make you a deal," he said suddenly, drawing back and staring Harry dead in the eye, "We carry on, what happens, happens. It doesn't have to last forever. And, if I meet this woman I'm supposed to marry, then if I'm really supposed to fall in love and marry her, then I will. Right? I'll do it willingly, unlike what we were forced into. If that's really my future, then I'll definitely choose her over you, right? So, until then... please... don't... Just please," he begged, his voice breaking as he bowed his head, resting it on Harry's chest, eyes squeezing shut.
Please, please let him listen.
Let him live.
Newt would worry about filling in the gaps in his education about magical marriage ceremonies later, but please, by all the Spirits and Powers that Be, let him live.
Harry sighed, "Alright."
000
Looking back, Harry realised that he had, once again, been railroaded from a perfectly viable course of action. A course of action he would have very little chance of attempting again if the fact that Newt had become thirty times clingier than before was any indication. Harry hadn't thought the Hufflepuff would be too cut up over his death, apparently he had thought wrong if the desperate way the man clung to him in the following days was any indication.
Forget sleeping in his own bedroll, Harry was lucky if he got away with bathing on his own after his attempt at cliff-diving. The fact that he had revealed he was from the future hadn't seemed to have really sunk in yet. That, or the man was aggressively ignoring it in favour of making sure Harry didn't leave his immediate arms reach – they now shared a camel as well as a bedroll, and Harry had given up trying to argue with every damp expression of betrayal he was treated to for trying to put some distance between them.
Of course, with the drop in temperature, Harry wasn't even upset about the change in sleeping arrangements, he was freezing and Newt had a freakishly high body temperature. One that he didn't mind sharing with Harry which was even better. It must have been a thing to do with working with dragons, Charlie was freakishly warm to the touch too – Ginny gloried in being his favourite sister (only sister), and snuggling with him under Molly's various patchwork quilts at Christmas, stealing all of his warmth.
They finally crested the hills, and below them the world swept away into gentle plains of golden coloured grasses, distant birds on the blue horizon, and discernible to no eyes but Harry's, golden flecks moving amidst the yellow grasses. A re'em herd in the distance.
"Here," Harry called, swinging off their camel, patting the braying animal absently as Newt slithered down beside him.
"Here?" the mythozoologist echoed curiously.
"Yep. There's a re'em herd just over yonder. This is probably the best place to release him. If he takes to the herd, then he'll join them. If not, then he can move on to a different herd, or follow behind this one until they accept him," Harry explained as he scrambled for the suitcase on the back of Newt's camel – the other one having all of their supplies.
The re'em in the case that they had rescued was a huge specimen, Harry had never seen them in the wild but he fancied that their boy was probably a bit bigger than the norm. Well fed, and healthier than most as well. Newt really knew his stuff when it came to creature care, and this fellow had been at their mercy for two months now. He was more than ready to go and sniff out some female company.
As evidenced by the way he nearly steam-rolled over Harry in his haste to approach the herd in the distance.
Newt scrambled for his binoculars, and notebook, Harry sat back against their resting camels as Newt went to work documenting the reintroduction of a rare magical creature, and its mating habits as the re'em in question battled for dominance against the current herd bull, and won. Harry hummed, breaking off a little of his oat-bar to share with his camel as Newt began to make excited noises, one hand writing in his notebook – his handwriting was lopsided and awful, Harry noted with amusement – while the other held the binoculars up to his face.
It was, perhaps, the first time since the cliff incident that Harry had the opportunity to sneak away.
He stretched out, rummaging a blanket from their packs, and took a nap instead.
0000
OTL;; omg this chapter.
Well, I finally got it finished. And I finally revealed the timetravel thing. This isn't the end of it, absolutely not. Newt's just found a patch and slapped it over the problem for now.