Lela
I can't leave the hospital just yet; my infection is keeping me from going home. That's okay; I don't want to go home without Diamond anyway. I go and see Diamond at ICN all the time. They have her hooked up to respirator inside of an incubator. My heart breaks for her, every time I see her. However, nothing is going to keep me away from baby when she needs me the most.
I am up at ICN, the nurse allows me to hold my baby. But I have to hold her inside the incubator through the gloves that are attached. Why did this have to happen? I laid her down and stroked her stomach. Next to me was a young guy visiting his new baby boy also in the ICN. I looked at the date of birth on the incubator; it was the same date Diamond was born. He seemed to be handling this situation a lot better then I was. Every time I leave the ICN I fall completely apart.
I had to leave ICN; they were going to run tests on her. I sat on the bench outside ICN crying hysterically. The guy comes over and gives me a glass of water. I looked at him, who are you?" I asked in tears.
"My name is Peter, I am sure your daughter is going to be okay." He said.
"Where is your wife?" I asked.
"My girlfriend died giving birth to David. She was dying and they had to take the baby early. Now, David may die as well." Peter explained.
"I am so sorry, how can you stay so strong?" I asked.
"Faith," He said.
"I wouldn't know anything about that." I told him.
"Why, is that." He asked.
"I rather not say." I said.
The nurse showed up to take me back to my room.
One night, I got drunk and ended up pregnant. Now I can't bear the idea of losing her.