AN: Thank you to every reader, every person following and favouriting this story. It's a slow build and you have all been patient but I hope you enjoy what I come up with for each character. They are the property of Dick Wolf et al no matter how much I wish otherwise.

Severide nearly picked a fight with Shay everyday the following week he was so sullen. He was home but he was in pain and she metered out doses with the efficiency of a drill sergeant. He already hated his crutches. His ribs felt better but not perfect, muscles pulling over still delicate bones. Already he was sick of his couch. The one Dawson had made up for him and he and Shay still weren't talking about and she had eaten nearly all the brownies in a premenstrual fit of self-loathing that threatened to implode their friendship. He was literally off balance in every way.

Part of his grouchiness came from the fact that someone in the brass had gotten ahold of Benny Severide and told him what was up with his son. Now his dad was plotting a visit to "check in" with him during his recovery and of course, give some sharp comment about how he never fell out of a window his entire career. It meant his dad was going to be in his room, inhabiting and snooping around his space while he lay on his couch and stared at the ceiling hoping he'd hidden his porn well enough.

He accepted, begrudgingly, that he was too weak for that at the moment as he leaned one hip against the counter, trying to work up the energy to move back to the couch. The pain was creeping up his spine again. He could feel himself spiking a sweat and part of him wondered if this was him wanting a pill for the pain or a pill for the high. The physiological effects of his near dependence on opiates had abated over time but it wasn't so far in the past that he couldn't remember what he felt. That neck injury and what he did to maintain his workload while avoiding it. He couldn't afford to be that foolish again. Severide scrambled onto a barstool near the kitchen counter. Right now he was alone with the precise number of doses it would take to get him through Shay's current shift in the ambulance. He wished he could work up more energy to be insulted but she's seen what he was like, asking her for more and more until she almost got in trouble for it and so he kept quiet.

He'd finally done the research much to Shay's annoyance. Contrary to Dr. Stephenson's limited opinion of him, paralysis was not the most common injury from a fall like his. It was head trauma. He'd escaped the worst of that because of his helmet, though it wasn't perfect and he still had headaches from time to time. Severide was a terrible patient. He knew that. His refusal to deal with a career ending injury in the most logical manner was proof of that. He couldn't hide from it this time. He'd gotten hurt in front of everyone to the tune of passing the fuck out from blood loss. Christ. It made him want to nurse a beer and zone out for a minute.

He watched Shay come through the door halfway into her shift and froze. She stood in the center of the room. Her hands were on her hips and she looked more out of sorts than he currently felt and that was saying it kindly.

As soon as Shay started talking he knew something was really off. She'd been the same way when he and Dawson had told her what was up. He'd put his arm around Dawson and she'd smiled up at him like she wasn't so nervous her knee was bopping under the table until he slid his hand over her thigh and took her hand. They'd both turned to Shay who didn't even have to ask because she knew them so well and proceeded to go off like the first dead drop on a rollercoaster all free for all and picking up steam. He'd held Dawson through all of it. Because much as she tried not to, he felt her flinch when Shay asked her if she was trying to be known as that girl in the firehouse. And he'd stopped Shay right there because it was Dawson and she was skittish enough and they were all friends and maybe just chill for a minute.

Except she was still clearly not chill with any of it, and he still didn't know what had gone wrong but Dawson had baked brownies and made up the couch which meant it wasn't irreparable. It meant she really believed he didn't do anything wrong. He was still confused and wanted to understand but first things first. Severide opened his arms as wide as they could go and gestured Shay in.

"Come here" he was ready for this truce at least. Pissed as he knew she still was about him sleeping with Dawson, Shay was family. And his family was spinning out because she was worried about him. "We're going to talk about it right now. Just get over here Leslie Shay. This is gonna hurt and I'm still doing it". Severide watched his roommate closely until she relented and walked straight into him.

It felt good to hold on to someone. Shay wormed her way into his grip and he balanced against the pain as she sniffed a little and he kissed her hair. "I'm okay you know. I'm here." He wasn't sure what else he could offer her besides that. They dealt with trauma every day and it always hit harder when it hit close to home. He knew that, but he wanted Shay to understand that he was going to be okay. That he was going to continue to be the bratty roommate she loved.

"Yeah, yeah" she replied, sneak wiping away tears. Shay sighed and looked up at Severide. "Do you want to talk here or on the couch?" Severide was dreading this discussion but knew it needed to happen. He didn't like hesitating and being cautious around Shay. He didn't want what he was doing with Dawson to be such a problem for her. But it was and the outcome of this conversation mattered. Had he expected waking up in Dawson's bed to change everything between them? No. He figured they'd both sweep it under the rug never to be referenced again. Except something in him resisted. He couldn't explain what but he wasn't going to hide from it either. So he hopped on his good leg to the couch and propped pillows under his bad one. Shay hugged an extra pillow to her chest and sat cross legged on the opposite end of the couch and waited. Severide sighed.

"What do you want to know?"

"Leaving aside the fact that you lied to me for two months straight about where you were. What is this Kel?" And with that first shot across the bow, Severide knew he was in for an interrogation. Shay was hurt he didn't trust her enough to tell her but in his defense, would it have changed her reaction? He thought probably not so he hedged.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean is this a thing. You've been sleeping with Gabi for months. Do you want more from her?"

"I'm not pushing-"

"That's not an answer"

"It's all I have since something clearly happened while I was in a coma" Severide retorted which sounded just as strange coming out of his mouth as it sounded in his head. "I wasn't pushing her before and we were fine." He knew they had been. He remembered the morning before his fall more clearly than the moments leading right up to it or right after. He was staring at her from across the firehouse as she checked supplies in the ambulance and every once in awhile she'd give him a quick glance then shake her head with a smile. For all her discomfort with Shay that morning, D had been happy. He knew that much.

"Fine isn't great Kel. Fine is how you describe a Monday where nobody died but you're covered in the bloody viscera of a victim who almost flatlined twice in front of her kid. Fine is not how you describe being my partner's fuck buddy de jour". He knew Shay had a mean streak. It was rare because she was more neurotic than anything else and bent on helping others daily, in an ambulance or not. But something about this situation dialed it up to a level he hadn't seen her take with her own ex Clarice and it made him want to back off before things got ugly.

"Shay, we didn't label it. We didn't need to. I could say it just happened and that would be true of the first night, but every time after was a choice and I am sorry I hurt you by hiding it. Can you honestly tell me you would have handled it well if I walked in here the morning right after and told you?"

They both knew the answer to that. Shay had leveled more exasperated stares and lectures at him than anyone else he knew. And he took it because he knew she cared. She'd defended him to Renee's brother when he was content to be the bad guy. Shay had consoled him and hugged him until he almost split in two when he told her he wasn't going to Spain after all. That he'd let another Renee go because being a Chicago firefighter was his entire identity.

Severide gazed right into Shay's eyes. "Wouldn't you have preferred it coming from her?" If it was anyone but him, the answer would be yes. He knew that. Knew the girls dished about the guys Dawson slept with and Shay's hopeless gaydar. He was a special case because he was her best friend and Dawson was her work partner and if things went badly they could all be in dire straits. Shay looked at Severide sadly and he knew he wasn't going to like what she said next.

"Kel, Dawson loves Casey. Dawson has always loved Casey. Even in the midst of her relationship with Mills, she was all about Casey. Are you trying to ruin three friendships with one casual fling?"

He didn't ask which friendships because it was obvious. Casey. Mills. Shay. Not to mention Dawson herself. He wasn't trying to screw up anything. If Dawson hadn't looked so gorgeous, fresh faced and slightly hungover that morning maybe this wouldn't even be an issue. It didn't matter. He didn't believe in mistakes when what you did was a choice. And Shay was telling him he had to choose.

"It's not that casual Shay. You know that. I wouldn't wreck us for casual." he was trying to bargain because he saw the ultimatum coming and he didn't want to hear it. The choice would be taken from him because family was family and he didn't have much.

"Doesn't matter. He'd never forgive you". What went unspoken was neither would she.

Thoughts?