A/N: This story is rated M for adult themes. The opinions of the characters do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the author.

Thank you to all those who have read (and reviewed) this story!

I do not own Hunter X Hunter or any other mentioned literature/books in this story.

Enjoying a Vacation With the Juwasi

Truthfully, Kuroro had very mixed feelings about alligator hunting. It wasn't like he had never done it before. In Meteor City, food was scarce so anything that had a heartbeat was considered fair prey. By some happy chance, Kuroro, at a young age, had discovered the existence of blind, albino and very fat alligators living in the polluted waters of the industrial-sized sewage pipes that ran through all of Meteor City. Through the ingenious use of some rope, a large wooden crate and a good lot of splashing in the waters, Kuroro managed to snag the occasional alligator dumb enough to consider him an easy meal. (In hindsight, Kuroro suspected that eating that meat had probably been a bad idea since his brain just hadn't been the same since then. It was likely due to the high levels of mercury in the water and meat. Or maybe, it was just puberty that occurred around the same time, which did it for his brain.) At any rate, Kuroro was no stranger to alligator hunting, so that was not the problem.

"The problem is," Kuroro told Midoya as he squashed a packet of something brown and squishy that Midoya claimed was food into a knapsack, "that I felt sorry for the poor beasts."

"You did?" Midoya asked, surprised, as she filled their bottles with mineral water.

"Absolutely," Kuroro said, zipping up the knapsack. "What did the poor beasts do to me anyway, to deserve to be killed like that? All they were doing was floating around in the sewage pipes. Apparently they lived on the huge quantity of insects found in the pipes. So, they were just happily eating giant roaches when one day, I came along and started killing and eating them. Poor things probably didn't know what hit them." He straightened up and looked around the little hut they were in. It would be the last of civilization they would see for a while once they ventured into the Lori Swamps.

"I honestly never expected you to feel sorry for anything," Midoya said, standing up as well. While Kuroro was dressed casually in long pants, functional boots and a plain shirt, Midoya was dressed in a safari top, shorts and a hat. She looked like a rich tourist slumming in the wilderness, until one noticed the wicked machete tucked in her belt. "Do you feel sorry for the people you kill too?"

"People? Oh no, of course not," Kuroro said, waving a hand dismissively. "People are born inherently evil. All the people I killed deserved to die for one reason or another."

"Oh good. That sounds more like the Kuroro I know," Midoya said, relieved, as she shouldered her over-sized knapsack. "Well, if you really don't want to kill any alligators, we can always go bird-watching."

"Bird-watching? Are there many bird species here?" Kuroro asked interestedly.

"The Lori Swamps has fantastic birds," Midoya said as they made their way towards the speedboat that would be their mode of transport during their one day tour of the Lori Swamps. "The last time I was here, I saw the most gorgeous colossal kingfishers. They came in all the shades of blue, green and yellow. It was quite a sight to see, especially when they started eating some of the slower members of my tour group."

"Sounds wonderful," Kuroro agreed. He had seen some pretty red birds outside the hut. They looked like flamingoes, but he was certain flamingoes did not grow six feet tall and have nasty, sharp teeth obviously designed to rent flesh and crack bones.

"Or we could go monster hunting!" Midoya said, perking up.

"Monster hunting?"

"There are rumours in these parts of a man-eating monster that appeared recently. It is, supposedly, a giant ape seven feet tall with the face of a pig and the claws of a bear," Midoya said excitedly. "They call it Juwasi in this area by the way. It means 'looks like your granddad's bottom'. Wouldn't it be fun hunting one of those?"

"That story reeks of a thousand rumours and myths," Kuroro said doubtfully as he stepped into the speedboat.

"That's why it'll be fun!" Midoya giggled, spinning in a happy circle before leaping lightly into the boat. "Oh, it'll probably turn out to be a gator or a bear in the end, but wouldn't it be great if we solved the mystery?"

Kuroro smiled. Her enthusiasm was catching. "Sure, we can try," he said. "There's no harm in doing so. We can bird-watch and look for monsters at the same time." Besides, his prophecy did tell him to enjoy his 'vacation'. There couldn't be any harm in indulging in a little folklore investigation. It might turn out to be fun after all, and if this Juwasi did exist, he could sell it for money – a lot of money. The bandit in him brightened up at that thought.

"Great!" Midoya exclaimed, beaming widely. In her excitement, she looked a lot younger than she really was.

"Well then," Kuroro said, warming up to the expedition. "Shall we?"

"Yup!" Midoya chirped. "Let's go! You drive though. The last time I tried driving a boat, I ran over a pair of fishermen. It was all quite tragic. The good news was, their dead corpses attracted the attention of a giant gator, and that's how I got my trophy! So there was a happy ending to the story after all. If only I didn't have to eat it in the end…"

"Wonderful," Kuroro agreed as he started up the engines.

The weather was fantastic, there was the prospect of seeing beautiful man-eating birds, finding a mythical beast and running over fishermen along the way. Yes, he was definitely going to enjoy this vacation.

Two hours later, Kuroro was tying the dead carcass of a twenty foot alligator to the back of the speedboat. As it turned out, all doubts Kuroro had about the morality of alligator hunting were put to rest when one of the numerous giant alligators inhabiting the swamp tried to eat him. The alligators here, he realized shortly after setting off, didn't look anything like those back in Meteor City. While those in Meteor City were fat, slow and cute in a rather silly way, the ones here were large, muscular and very rude. When Kuroro tried to pat one of them, it grabbed his arm and dragged him into the water where Kuroro was forced to demonstrate how disappointed he was with its behavior.

"Nice," Midoya commented as she helped him reel the body in. "I've never seen anyone kill an alligator with a single dart between the eyes."

"Thank you," Kuroro said graciously.

"Never seen anyone try to pat one either."

"I thought it looked lonely. Guess it was just hungry."

"Ah, yes. It was an easy mistake to make. I assume you are no longer opposed to hunting gators now."

Kuroro looked around the swamp at the other gators watching them. They sank below the surface embarrassedly under his gaze. "Guess not," he said with a shrug. "Especially if they continue to bother me."

"I somehow doubt we will be bothered by them anymore," Midoya commented wryly as the area around them became suspiciously empty of gators. "Shall we continue on? If we want to see the really pretty birds, we have to go a little deeper into the swamps."

"But of course."

Not half an hour later, they came upon a flock of beautiful yellow and green birds. They stopped the boat to watch as the birds swooped about the sky in formation, sparkling a gorgeous gold in the bright morning sun.

"Beautiful," Kuroro commented appreciatively. "What species is that?"

"Nonhwng," Midoya informed him. "It means…" The birds swooped down suddenly, snatching a massive thirty-foot alligator from the water and flying off with it, "gator-eater," Midoya finished. They watched the flock disappear into the distance with their prey. "I heard they flourish here because there are so many gators here," she added as an afterthought.

"Lovely. I like them already."

They continued on. Midoya had been right; the Lori swamps had the most fantastic birds. Kuroro saw flocks of tiny turquoise birds fluttering across the sky, beautiful orange swan-like birds that growled at them when they got too close, and birds with multi-coloured plumages singing in the trees. Kuroro believed it was a rather enchanting rendition of the drinking song Fuck It I Can Drive While Drun-.

"Marvelous," Kuroro had said as both he and Midoya peered curiously at a bird in the water, which glared back at them with a great deal of suspicion. Though it was shaped somewhat like a duck, the flesh, organs and feathers of the bird were transparent, so Kuroro could see right through to the bones. "Absolutely marvelous."

"Quack," the bird replied balefully before diving under the surface of the water. It vanished from sight almost instantly.

As they went on, the sun rose to its apex and the number of bird sightings started to drop. "Let's stop for a rest," Midoya suggested. "There's a camp site not too far from here. We can stop there for lunch."

"Okay," Kuroro said agreeably. He was in a good mood. It had been a wonderful idea to come out here. The smell of blood in the air was very refreshing, and it was definitely more exciting being out here than sitting in the base and folding paper planes.

Carefully, he guided the speedboat towards the banks where there was a break in the vegetation. Almost immediately, he spotted a post that the boat could be tethered to. Evidently, this was a popular spot for hunters and tourists to stop at. With a great deal of efficiency, they secured the boat and started walking inland. The ground was slushy, which made for a difficult trek, but as it turned out, the camp site was not far from the river.

Fifteen minutes later, Kuroro saw a break in the dense vegetation of the swamp. Going through it revealed a wide space that had been artificially cleared of foliage. Three tiny huts stood in the middle of it. They were made of wood and had thatch roofs. Instead of resting on the ground, they were elevated off the muddy soil by a series of interlocking poles. "To avoid floods," he guessed, examining the damp, moldy poles.

"Yup," Midoya said as she selected the driest hut available.

Kuroro looked around. The hut was empty and somewhat run down, but it was dry and provided adequate shelter from the noon sun. If anything, his main problem with the hut was how tiny it was. He could not stand straight without hitting his head on the thatch roof, so he settled for scooting about on all fours. Midoya, who could stand straight without hitting her head, didn't laugh. In fact, she considerately joined him on all fours.

"My rule of thumb is never to embarrass the client," she explained cheerfully.

"Ah," Kuroro said, and still felt vaguely embarrassed anyway.

"Food?" A package of the ambiguously brown and squishy substance was offered to him. It turned out to be some kind of processed food the nature of which Kuroro could not identify. "It's supposed to contain all the calories, protein and vitamins you need in a meal," Midoya told him, smiling at the look on his face. "Apparently astronauts take these with them into space."

"I see," Kuroro said, and tried not to appear too fussy about his food. It wasn't that it tasted bad. That would have been fine with him; he had been forced to eat some nasty things in his life (like radioactive mushrooms; it's a long story). It was simply the texture of it, which was slimy and gritty at the same time. It made him a little nauseous eating it, but he forced it down. Residents of Meteor City never wasted food, no matter how disgusting it tasted.

They finished their meal in a comfortable silence then Midoya started for the entrance. "I'm going to check out the river conditions further down," she told him. "The currents in the next stretch can be unpredictable." Kuroro nodded in acknowledgement and she crawled out of the hut.

For a moment, the hut was entirely silent. Then slowly, sounds started to filter in from the outside; the rustling of leaves, the gentle slosh of water and the chirping of birds. Kuroro wondered if he should try catching some of the birds. He was still feeling hungry. Idly, he watched the shadows of the leaves on the ground outside the hut. A breeze stirred the leaves and brought the odour of the swamp into the hut. Kuroro inhaled deeply. Damp, decay and foliage was the best way he could think of to describe it.

A frown creased his forehead. There was another smell in the air. He inhaled again, this time in short, sharp breaths. It was an odd smell. It smelt like… musk. Animal musk. How odd. He wondered if there was a deer about, or perhaps a sloth. He had heard that mammals, while rare, could still be found in these swamps.

Abruptly, Kuroro got his answer when a large, hairy arm shot into the entrance, grabbed him by the ankle and dragged him out of the hut. Dangling upside down, Kuroro stared down at the creature holding him up. Well. How unexpected.

It looked like he had just found the Juwasi.

The first thought that struck Kuroro was how astonishingly accurate the descriptions of the Juwasi was. It stood well over seven feet, and had the arms and torso of a heavily muscular primate. The head, startling enough, looked like that of a rather adorable farm pig. The legs, on the other hand, ended in massive paws like that of a grizzly bear. As Kuroro stared, the pig head suddenly slit open from forehead to snout, revealing an oval slit teaming with sharp teeth and mandibles like that of an ant. Yup. Looked like granddad's bottom too.

"Fascinating," Kuroro couldn't help saying as he swung in the iron-grip of the Juwasi. "Absolutely fascinating."

To his surprise, the creature replied, "Food shut up."

"My goodness, and sentient too," Kuroro said, delighted.

"No speak," the Juwasi growled in a low guttural voice. "Bring to King. Eat."

"King! My goodness! Sentient and has a social structure!"

In response, the Juwasi shook Kuroro violently. "No speak," it growled, mandibles moving eerily. Turning, it started to stride deeper into the land, leaving heavy prints in the slushy mud. Immediately, Kuroro kicked the creature's wrist, hoping to dislodge its grip. The creature didn't even seem to notice. All Kuroro got out of it was an excruciating pain in his ankle.

This was not good. Though he did want to capture the creature alive and whole, he could not risk it bringing him deeper into the swamps. With a swift movement, Kuroro drew the machete from his belt and hacked at the massive hand clamped around his ankle. The Juwasi grunted in annoyance and ripped the machete out of his grip. It carelessly dropped the machete on the ground and peered at its wrist. The machete had nicked its hide. It wasn't even bleeding.

As the creature was distracted, Kuroro grabbed onto its wrist and twisted his ankle. His foot slid out of his boot and he landed on the ground nimbly. He did not stay to challenge the beast; he was obviously no match for it in his current state. His best bet was to head back towards the speed boat. If he managed to get it out onto the waters, the creature might not be able to follow him. There was also a chance he would run into Midoya. He had no doubt Midoya would be more than a match for the Juwasi.

It was a good plan. Unfortunately, he had not counted on a second Juwasi emerging from the bush and cutting off his escape. Sliding on the mushy soil, Kuroro could not stop himself from crashing into the second beast. Immediately, massive arms clamped around him, holding him to a large chest covered in a hard exoskeleton.

Kuroro did not even bother to struggle. He didn't have the leverage to get out of the creature's grip anyway. Instead, he examined the creature in front of him. It was obviously a second Juwasi, yet was obviously not a Juwasi. Though it too had the head of a pig, the rest of its body appeared to be that of a massive beetle standing over seven feet. Kuroro wasn't being held by two primate arms but four out of six insect legs.

"Food," the second beast said.

"Food," the first beast agreed.

"Capable of basic verbal communication," Kuroro commented mildly as they started to head deeper into the swamps.

The second beast responded by squeezing Kuroro so tightly he couldn't breathe. Breath taken away, Kuroro started gasping helplessly, but could not draw enough oxygen into his lungs. As darkness started to cloud his vision, Kuroro's last thought was, "My prophecy said to enjoy my vacation, and I must say, this is turning out to be a delightful vacation."

Eventually, darkness faded to light. Along with it came a horrible throbbing in his head and a strange numbness in his extremities.

Kuroro lay absolutely still, making a mental check list of his body parts. It seemed he was still in one piece, which was the good news. The bad news was that he appeared to be covered in something sticky that clung feebly to him like dried glue.

Slowly, Kuroro opened his eyes partially and looked around. He appeared to be dangling from a humongous tree in a cocoon of something transparent and slimy. A closer look revealed that he was not the only one. All around him, hanging from various branches were animals of various shapes and sizes. Some were still alive and struggling, some were dying, and others were already dead. The carcasses looked strange, as if they had been drained entirely until only an empty husk was left.

Movement along the branches caught his eye and he twisted his head slightly so he could look. A Juwasi with an alligator's head, a wild cat's body and human arms clambered up the tree nimbly, dragging a 200 pound fish behind it. As Kuroro watched, the Juwasi squatted on a branch, reached between its legs and excreted a large glop of a mucus-like substance into its hand. Deftly, it used that to wrap the still feebly flopping fish up and hang it from the branch.

Oh good. Now he knew exactly what the cocoon he was in was made of.

Gradually, Kuroro tried to sit up. His cocoon wobbled dangerously and he fell over. With a little more care, Kuroro finally managed to reach a somewhat vertical position. The change in posture gave him a bird's-eye view of the swamp below him.

To be accurate, he did not appear to be in a swamp anymore. Though the land still looked somewhat mushy, the trees were a lot taller and sturdier than most swamp plants, and resembled trees normally found in a forest instead. The trees weren't what caught Kuroro's attention though. What caught his attention were the dozens of Juwasi scuttling about below the tree and on the tree. Quickly, he realized that the tree he was hanging on had been hollowed out, and was being used as a kind of base for the creatures. They were constantly entering and leaving roughly-cut holes scattered at the various levels of the tree.

An ant's nest, Kuroro realized. He was looking at creatures that functioned like ants.

Kuroro's thoughts were interrupted when a massive pink tube, at least two feet wide, extended suddenly from the top of the tree. The tube swooped towards one of the cocoons holding a massive alligator, at least thirty feet in length. A long, sharp fang slid out from the tube and pierced both the cocoon and the alligator. The whole tree shuddered as the tube started to suck. Within seconds, the alligator was nothing but an empty husk hanging in a deflated cocoon.

Well, that must be the King the Juwasi were talking about. It was most certainly one huge Juwasi.

Tentatively, Kuroro probed at the cocoon holding him. It stretched and flexed under his touch. Grabbing onto it, he tore at it with all his strength. The substance stretched under his pull but did not break. Kuroro paused thoughtfully then pulled his favourite dagger out of his belt and stuck it into the cocoon. The blade slipped through easily enough, but when Kuroro tried to cut through the cocoon, the sticky material simply sealed itself up.

Mildly annoyed, he stopped and looked around. There had to be something else he could do. He felt in his pockets and pulled out the keys to the speedboat, a whistle and a candy bar. He stared at them for a while, wondering what he could do with those. That did not help so he looked around instead. The panicked animals hanging around him did not provide much inspiration either.

Well, well, well.

With a sigh, Kuroro settled back into his cocoon, cradling his head in his arms. There really wasn't anything he could do now, so he might as well take a nap. His best bet was to hope Midoya managed to find him, preferably before he got his insides sucked out by a giant pink tube.

On the bright side, this wasn't the worst vacation he has ever had. There had been that time in Pyonkin with the llama that kept trying to eat his hair…

At some point, Kuroro must have fallen asleep because when he next opened his eyes, the sun was low in the sky and the entire land was dyed a reddish orange. Blinking sleepily, he struggled into a sitting position and looked around. It seemed the Juwasi were getting ready to retire for the night. There was a lot less activity going on below, and some of the Juwasi were using leaves and vines to cover up the holes at the base of the tree. Large Juwasi, a lot bigger than the ones that had caught him, continued to patrol the tree, circling the base of the tree.

Yawning, Kuroro pulled out the candy bar and started to eat. He briefly considered rationing the food then changed his mind. No doubt, all the animals hanging in the tree, including himself, would be dead in a day or two. If the King did not eat them, dehydration and exposure to the environment would kill them. There was no point rationing the food. He might as well keep his energy up for as long as he can.

A flash of something bright caught his eye and Kuroro paused in mid-chew. Nonchalantly, he resumed chewing, eyes fixed on where he had caught a gleam of something metallic at the base of the tree. One of the large Juwasi wandered near the spot and abruptly vanished into the darkness. A faint smile fleeted across Kuroro's face and he finished the last of the candy bar. Leaning his arms on his knees, he waited patiently, enjoying the way the cocoon rocked gently in the evening breeze.

Briefly, the rocking intensified and Kuroro looked at the branch next to his. A gleaming statue of silver stood on the branch looking back at him. In the light of dusk, Midoya's Yang form radiated a stunning red so she looked like steel wrapped in flames.

"Midoya," he greeted pleasantly, "so good of you to drop by."

The silver statue inclined its head in greeting. Warily, Midoya poked at the cocoon with her finger then tilted her head at him inquisitively.

"This will be a little tricky," Kuroro told her, "the foul substance this cocoon is made out of can be stretched and penetrated, but not torn. I am not sure you can tear it, even with the strength of Yang. I would strongly recommend you try though. I have discovered where this substance comes from and I am most keen to get out of it."

Midoya nodded and held up an arm. Liquid metal flowed over her palm and solidified into a wicked-looking blade that glowed with Nen. Interestedly, Kuroro watched as Midoya poured more Nen into the blade until it started to glow. Carefully, she inserted the Nen-strengthened blade into the cocoon. Upon contact with her Nen, the cocoon started to smoke and hiss. Kuroro wriggled out of the way to give her more space to work and she dragged the blade down. Her Nen seemed to harden the cocoon, making it brittle and fragile.

Abruptly, the cocoon disintegrated around him and Kuroro found himself falling. He landed nimbly on the branch below him then crouched down before any of the patrolling Juwasi could catch sight of him. Midoya, back in human form, dropped onto the branch next to him and passed him a machete. Kuroro recognized it; it was the one he had lost just that afternoon.

"Thank you," he murmured, hefting the blade. It did feel good to have a weapon of destruction in his hands again.

"Kuroro," Midoya whispered. "I have a favour to ask of you."

"Yes?"

"May I be released from our agreement for tonight? Just tonight."

Kuroro regarded her thoughtfully. She stared back, eyes solemn and steady. "Why?" he asked finally.

With a graceful movement, Midoya moved onto the branch he was on and pulled out her cellphone. "I need to exterminate the Juwasi," she said quietly. "I just got a notice from the Hunter's Association. You can read it here. In summary, apparently, these Juwasi are a species of ants that attack and kill humans. They are an extremely destructive breed, and have, for some reason, spread rapidly to different parts of the world recently. If left be, they can wipe out entire civilizations and ecosystems."

"Is that so?"

"That is so," Midoya confirmed. "I must admit I took a long look around this nest before coming to save you. With about fifty Juwasi, it seems this nest is considered one of the bigger colonies outside the original nest. Now, according to the intel I received, most of the Juwasi or ants are incapable of breeding. The giant Juwasi inside this tree is one of the few that can reproduce, and it must be destroyed before it causes anymore harm."

"What do you suggest we do then?" Kuroro asked.

A smile flashed briefly across Midoya's face. "I don't expect you to do anything," she said gently. "Without your Nen, this would be a huge risk for you to take. I recommend that you retire to safety while I deal with the nest. Once the Juwasi realize the nest is under attack, they will swarm back to protect it. You should be quite safe from them then. I doubt the usual dangers of the swamp hold much threat to you. Just head north for about three hours and you will reach the campsite. Wait there for me."

"No."

Midoya blinked. "No?" she questioned tentatively.

"No," Kuroro elaborated. "I do not want to return to the campsite just yet."

"Why not? You like being covered in slime?"

"I am on vacation, aren't I?" Kuroro smiled. "I want to go sight-seeing."

"This is hardly the safest place to go sight-seeing."

"The places worth seeing never are," Kuroro said with a shrug. "I am extraordinarily curious about these 'ants'. What a strange species! Though you claim they come from the same species, one 'ant' looks so different from another. Why is that so? I must get a chance to take a good look at them before you wipe them off the face of this earth. Besides…"

"Besides?" Midoya questioned, an eyebrow raised.

"Besides, I want to see the infamous Two Star Blacklist Hunter Midoya in action," Kuroro finished, meeting her eyes.

Even in the growing dark, he could see her eyes light up in response to his subtle challenge. "So," she said casually, "my dear client, Mr Lucifer. You want me to fight and kill fifty powerful, sentient ants, armed with claws, fangs and poison, and their enormous king while protecting you from any danger just so you can enjoy the local fauna, myself included?"

"Put most succinctly, yes. And make it flashy and graphically violent. I am afraid I was very offended by the way the ants treat their guests. The accomodations leave much to be desired."

"Oh good. Flashy and violent too," Midoya said dryly as she started to lead him down the tree. "And here I was afraid this mission would be too simple."

A/N: I realized that there are several versions of the prophecy Kuroro got from Neon, thanks to different translators of the manga. The version I read, in Chinese, said that Kuroro was to enjoy his 'vacation', though the anime did not seem to have mentioned that. So, for those who are confused by Kuroro's reference to 'enjoying his vacation', this is the reason why. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed the story. Please remember to leave a review!

Also, please forgive any mistakes I might have made in this chapter. Writing while down with the flu is not a happy experience!

Trivia: For a period of time, an enterprising young Kuroro Lucifer had tried his hand at the tourist industry. Visitors to Meteor City (largely comprising of evil mafia people), for a reasonable price of ten zennis a day, were taken on an enlightening tour of the more decent parts of the country. Guided by a very knowledgeable Kuroro Lucifer, the tourists were first given a tour of indigenous areas like 'Garbage Dump Site A', where for an extra price of five zennis, visitors could try their hands at sifting through garbage for usable material, thus getting a taste of the main form of livelihood in the country. Next, visitors were taken through 'Rundown Slum Town 3', where visitors would tour the make-shift cardboard boxes that the natives sleep in. Included in this tour is lunch at the guide's own cardboard box. On the menu are local delicacies, including 'Alligator Cooked Over an Open Fire', 'Cockroaches Cooked Over an Open Fire', 'Spiders Cooked Over an Open Fire' and the very popular 'Radioactive Giant Rats Cooked Over an Open Fire'. In theory, after that, Kuroro Lucifer would take his guests on a tour of the Meteor City Sewage System. Oddly enough, all the guests he had to date (all three of them) all dropped dead after lunch. He never found out why.