Chapter 10: The True Loss

It was a cold night when Isaac found himself sitting in his car. He left the city, and found the tree it was hidden by. After uncovering it, he sat there, drinking the whiskey that he stole, using the car's heater to keep warm. Half the bottle was gone, and Isaac was feeling drowsy. But he couldn't sleep. He was scared at what his nightmares would be. His nightmares were of him. Two sides of him. The person he has become, the bloodbending psychopath, torturing his old self. They were the worst he had ever had, and though they were just dreams, he was too scared to sleep. All he felt was pain and guilt. He was a failure.

Eventually only a quarter of the bottle was left, and Isaac was at his drunkest, he heard movement outside the car. Opening the door and falling out, Isaac levitated small spheres of earth, ready to send them through whoever was there.

"That would be no use." Said a kind-sounding voice.

"Who are you?" asked Isaac, voice slurred. A tall man stepped out of the shadows. He was bald, with arrow tattoo's running down his arms and over his head. He wore yellow and orange robes, and Isaac had the feeling he was a monk

"Isaac, I am avatar Aang." Said the monk.

"How am I talking to you? Last time I spoke with an Avatar, I was unconscious and concussed." Said Isaac.

"The Avatar is the link to the spiritual world. Untrained Avatars tend to accidentally find their spiritual side during times of emotional distress."

"Why are you here?" asked Isaac.

"I am here to help you."

Isaac listened inquisitively, but still drunk from the whiskey.

"I know how you feel. Guilty. I have been through the same experience. I had gone into the Avatar state, and hurt people, including the person I loved more than anything. This guilt caused me to swear off firebending, and kept me from being what an Avatar is meant to be." Said Aang.

"The difference between you and me is that you deserve to be the Avatar," said Isaac, "I don't. The power of the Avatar made me a monster. I tortured and killed people. I killed them in the most excruciating ways that make me sick to even think about now."

"As much as you don't want it to be true, the world needs you. But the world is worse off with you now than without an Avatar," explained Aang, "You must forgive yourself, and control your anger and desire for revenge. But while you have the power of the Avatar, this will never happen. You will try to become what you are supposed to, but will succumb to the temptation of using your power for the wrong reason. That is why I have come."

"What are you getting at?" asked Isaac.

Aang lifted his hand and placed it on Isaac's forehead. Suddenly his eyes and tattoo's began to glow. Isaac felt a surge of energy leave him, and he collapsed to the ground.

"What did you do?" asked Isaac.

"I took away your bending. I am your past life, I see the depths of your heart, and I know that as long as you can bend the elements, you will spiral further and further into the life you are trying to leave." Said Aang.

"What? How am I supposed to be the Avatar with no bending?!" yelled Isaac.

"Once I see you fit to be the Avatar, I will return your bending. But until then, you must return to the right path. The path of good." Explained Aang as he started to disappear.

Angry at Aang, and hoping it was all a hallucination, Isaac attempted to ignite the grass around Aang. But nothing happened, and Aang disappeared.

Suddenly a wave of drowsiness hit Isaac, and he collapsed to the ground passing out.

Isaac woke in a strange room. He looked in the corner. And saw Kayla sitting in a corner.

"The owner of the paddock you were parked on heard some weird noises. He came out to investigate and found you passed out by the car. The only thing in the wallet was your fake ID and Isabelle's number. He called me, and I picked you up." Explained Kayla.

"Thank you. I would have died out there." Said Isaac.

"Don't think this changes anything." She said, "I felt sorry for you. That's it."

"I know."

"So what happened? Why were you passed out with a bottle of whiskey next to you?" she asked.

"I hit a low, and felt like a drink. I took it too far." He explained, trying to resist the urge to vomit, "Then a previous Avatar came. One of my past lives. He said I stumbled into my spiritual side. He told me that I was meant to be more, but as long as I have my bending I won't change. Then he took my bending away. It's all gone."

"He was right." Kayla said.

"About what?"

"You are meant to be more. So much more. But you let revenge get to your head, and became a monster."

"I know that. I want to change. And not just to get my bending back. I can't live with the guilt of what I have done. It is eating me alive" sobbed Isaac.

"Maybe this is what you need to change. It was the power and the need for revenge that changed you. Maybe without them, you will change again. For the better." said Kayla as she sat down next to him.

"I'm so sorry. For everything I did." Said Isaac.

"I know you are, but I am not ready to forgive you." Said Kayla, "You tortured those men, and killed them brutally. Then you almost had me shoot myself. I am sorry but I can't, not yet."

"I will change. I promise you that."

Kayla smiled, for the first time since the assault on the Burning Suns HQ.

"Trust me Isaac, I would want nothing more."