MANY THANKS FOR THE 100 REVIEWS!

As once said by GLaDOS, I'm still guys are probably wondering where I've been. If you even care. Sob. Nah, I'm kidding. I've just been a lazy ass of late, so I decided to wait for inspiration to slap me in the face again, and come back to this later. It kinda worked, 'cause I returned to writing this train wreck.

I recently read the kink meme on Livejournal. I mean... after reading it, I've never wanted some fluff so bad. Seriously.

Also, I wanted to tell people to GO READ THE AMAZING STUFF WRITTEN BY Moonphase9. She is awesome and NEEDS MORE REVIEWS. I'm not pitying her or anything, but her stuff really needs more interest!

XXX

The sound of fingers pressing the buttons of a keyboard rapidly resounded through the room, and Light stared at the slightly ominous plastic screen of his laptop, the constantly darkening circles underneath his eyes simply screaming THIS GUY NEEDS SOME SLEEP.

Light re-read the words slithering up his laptop's screen. How to find a missing person...

It had been three weeks. Three. Long. Weeks.

L had not even texted to say he was okay. No appearance whatsoever. He'd just... vanished. And Light's dad had not been taking it well. L's grandfather had apparently been assaulting him with emails, saying 'Where is L?', and 'Is L back yet?'.

And Light had been reduced to looking on the Internet for answers.

Not that he wanted to see L that badly. He just didn't like seeing his father so depressed.

Not that seeing L would be a bad thing.

Light smacked himself on the head out of his own annoyance. He'd given up on telling himself to stop thinking about L, and to stop thinking inappropriately. But, he just... couldn't.

And the dreams had an awful clasp on him.

He couldn't stop wondering about sex, and he couldn't stop dreaming about sex, and he couldn't stop thinking about L. It was as if all boundaries had been torn down in his head... no, rather they had fallen from lack of care. He wouldn't bother going to the bathroom at night anymore... he'd just lie in bed and relieve himself.

The worst part was, when he masturbated, he would think about the dreams. But the idea of sleeping with a faceless person wasn't exactly exciting, and somewhere along the way he'd started... he'd started... pretending this 'Ryuzaki' guy was...

L. Ugh. Light shivered at his own disgust.

He hoped he wasn't creating a blurred image of L. Not to mention that he was now forced to admit to himself that he was attracted to L.

The futon L would sleep on was constantly unfurled next to Light's bed. Light glanced at it, and turned back to the crappy website he was viewing. Ugh, how useless. None of the information had given him a slight insight as to where L was. Light had searched every possible place L could've been. But he hadn't even glimpsed him once, no matter where he went.

Light bit his index finger out of habit. It was amazing how persistent this worrying of his was.

Light stood up. He was tired, and turned towards his bed, and started making his way towards it. He scratched the back of his head haphazardly, and yawned. He could feel his eyes watering. It was what, almost three in the morning? How troublesome...

However, Light wasn't watching his footing, and tripped on the edge of the messy futon that obstructed his path to his bed.

"Shit!"

He fell flat on his face onto the futon, and, as usual when it had to do with L (it was his futon) he somehow managed to hurt his nose.

Too tired to pull himself up immediately, Light lied face down on the futon for a minute or two. Before he knew it, a musty, familiar smell assaulted his nasal passage. The smell of burnt sugar, and foreign soap...

... L.

Light lay very still upon remembering who the scent belonged to, frozen, only to then bunch the blankets up in his hands, press his face into the covers and smell more deeply, out of impulse. He didn't care anymore. Who would care, anyway? He wasn't in love with L, he didn't like L. He just believed that, for some strange, strange reason, L was extremely attractive. Though a few seconds prior to such impulsive behaviour, he began to regret his lack of self-control as the images from his dreams began to attack him.

It all... just dwarfed everything else in his head.

Not before too long, a bulge began to form in his trousers, and he decided he couldn't be asked to stop himself. He'd attempted in the past, and found that it was of no use- all it did to him was slightly postpone his... actions. His hand slowly, ever so slowly, snuck past his waist, and undid the zipper of his jeans. His hand started to work of its own accord, and, his senses blind to everything save for the smell of L and the slowly encompassing warmth that spread through his crotch. Light closed his eyes and moaned into the blankets, and would've been completely lost in himself...

... Had it not been for the sound of someone clearing their throat from behind him.

"You seem to be enjoying the bedding."

Light's eyes snapped open almost immediately, and, completely forgetting he had his junk uncovered, rolled over and pulled himself up in sheer surprise. The room was quite dark, and his eyes were not adjusted to the lack of light.

"Whuh? Who is there?"

The figure sighed, and landed head first onto the futon, at first next to Light, then onto Light's thigh. "Take a wild guess." He sighed, muffled by the blankets.

Light's eyes widened, and he sat up with a start. He examined the stranger quickly, scanning their, from what Light could make out, spiky black hair and pale skin. To come to any other conclusion would mean Light was a total idiot.

"...L? Is.. Is that you?"

"No, it's Joan Rivers. Get the hell out of my house."

"Who's Joan Rivers?"

"Light, I'm tired. Too tired to explain..."

"I'm guessing from your sarcastic reply and mentioning of people I have never heard of before that it is you... Where have you been?"

L paused.

"I have been on a long journey down the side of South America on an old rusty bike, with an overweight acquaintance of mine, out of my own desire for a sense of reckless abandonment."

"... Is it me, or are you quoting a movie I've never heard of before?"

"Yes, Light. Yes I am."

Light frowned, and rolled L off of his leg. "L," he began, inspecting the older boy's face. Upon doing so, he recoiled in disgust. L's breath stank...

"Are you drunk?"

L paused yet again.

"... Yes. Yes I am."

Light recoiled a little, sporting a now deep-set frown. "What? What? Who the hell gave you alcohol?"

"Some German guy."

"... Are you high?"

"No, just a little intoxicated, or abbreviated, or inebriated... or whatever..."

"Just a fucking little?"

"Yeah..."

Light scratched his head, and his eyes flickered up and down L's body, attempting to figure out what exactly to do. He could get L some coffee, to sober him up... but what if he woke his parents? He'd have too many questions to answer, and he was too tired to bother doing that.

At that point he remembered he was uncovered, and managed to grab some of the blankets to hide his modesty (or disguise the erection as a weird crease, who knows). Staring at the currently drunk fifteen year old through the darkness, he felt the urge to talk.

"So... where did you actually go...?"

L pulled himself up, and leant against Light's shoulder. Light flinched a little, but didn't move.

"I went to, like... look for someone."

Light paused, scanning his memory for the time when L had said something similar to him. "... Is this person the same one you were looking for before?"

"Hmh? Oh, yeah."

Light's frown increased in size. "So... was the german person the one you were looking for? Why did he give you alcohol?"

L groaned at the idea of having to talk more. "He wasn't, and that's why I, like, drank what he gave me. He was like..." L put on an incredibly incorrect accent, which he obviously found hard to convey into Japanese (while he was under the influence of vodka, anyway), " ... 'Herr, drank zum off dis!', so I took some, and it smelt like it was attracting everyone's attention..."

"Why?"

"What? Ah, wait... wait, I mean, it smelt like nail varnish... but I didn't care, I just wanted to forget stuff, y'know?"

Light squinted a little at L, trying to see the outline of his features more. "What were you trying to forget?" He said quietly.

L laughed sarcastically. "Ohohoho, you... want to know? Basically... basically... basically, I had no food or water or anything, and I was like, ill... but, but this guy, I know him, he like works for people... people, y'know?" L paused and Light could just make out that L was looking at him, as if expecting a reply.

Remember, Light, don't try to reason with the drunk. "Yeah, I know."

Light heard the rustling of material as L nodded his head. It seemed the longer L talked, the drunker he sounded. "So, he's like... he's like, 'Hay, I cun halp you!' So I let him help me!" L sounded strangely proud as he finished the sentance, as if he'd defeated a dragon, or used the toilet on his own for the very first time.

L then went very quiet. "But there was... I had to do stuff... I mean, I'm, like, used to it... the alcohol, the having to do it... and stuff..." L suddenly sounded very downhearted. Light could sense it in the atmosphere... well, he could feel that L was upset. Light felt bad. Damn, what should he do? Do something comforting, but manly. I wonder what he was forced to do... Light placed a hand on L's shoulder, pulling him into him a bit. L sighed as he did so, and reacted by wrapped his arms around Light in an uncharacteristically needy embrace (which made Light's spine go as straight as a pole, turning the whole situation into something twice as awkward). The older boy buried his face into Light's shirt. "Light... Light-o... Light-oooooooooooo..."

Light grimaced a bit.

"Light... you're nice to me. You're nice, Light. You smell nice, too... Good guy didn't smell German, I mean, German guy didn't smell... good... but Light-oooo does..."

L pushed his face into Light's neck. "... Light... can help, can help me forget stuff... too, but I would like it, because Light is a nice person." Light felt a hand brush against his breast bone. Light shivered, and went to slap his hand away, but L then pushed his lips against Light's neck, tracing them up his neck to his jawbone. Light made a small groan, and then went to grab L's wrist. "I want to kiss Light..."

"L, get lost, your breath stinks..." Light attempted to wrench the drunk off of him, but L moved his hand to Light's hip. He felt L's breath graze his cheek, and sensed something wet slide against the skin behind his ear, then lips pucker against his cheek, coming closer and closer to Light's mouth. The smell of vodka and salt stung Light's nostrils, and L's tongue flickered against the edge of the younger boy's mouth, and despite Light's past protests, as soon as L rubbed against his upper thigh with his hand, Light ended up going lax. L's tongue, it's taste tinged with alcohol and a unknown sour flavour, invaded Light's mouth, sucking against Light's own tongue a little. Light pulled himself away, once again pushing against L chest in an attempt to get free, and panted. L wrapped his arms around Light, and sighed out, sounding relieved. "I like Light... so much right now..."

Light, still surprised, stared at L. Light was tired, and L was obviously exhausted. All attempts at getting L to have a proper conversation with Light had failed quite miserably, and, not knowing what else to do, Light simply patted L on the back and manouvered him around into his futon, then leaving the now sleeping L, whilst hoping the moron was back to himself in the morning.

XXX

"Ugh, it's like the Red Army Choir are having a shouting competition in my head."

"It's your own fault for getting drunk like that."

Light looked strangely laid-back as he sat at the kitchen table, reading something that looked like a dictionary. He wasn't actually interested in the dictionary, he just wanted to do something that made him look like he was ignoring L. L was face down on the table, with his hands covering his ears. He would groan from time to time, and fidget slightly, then go on to say something either annoying or offensive.

"I hate this house so much."

"Why?"

"Because you're in it."

Oh yeah, the argument before L had left. He was obviously still sore about it. But Light wasn't an extremely sensitive person when it came to other people, so he had no real idea as to how to apologise without sounding like a total berk. Not to confuse you- there's a huge difference between being sensitive and being emotional. Light can only achieve one.

"Wow, you were so nice last night I actually thought you'd forgotten about everything."

"I had. Hell, I was so nice last night that I'd forgetten exactly why I was nice or if I even was nice to you in the first place. And I'm so pissed off with you, I can't even be asked to pretend I'm all monotonous and stuff."

"... You're still drunk, aren't you?"

"Drunk enough to be tired. But sober enough to punch you in the face."

"..."

I hope he sobers up before we get to school.

Light managed to drag L into a coffee shop on the way to school, and despite his protests (and with a little force-feeding) L eventually drank the cup. And Light sincerly hoped that the caffeine would work. If it didn't, the only back-up plan there was was to totally ignore L and pray that he didn't embarass himself.

However, he had no such luck, as usual.

"Hey Ero! Nice posture!"

"Well, that's a rather original insult... nice boobs."

This would have made more sense if he wasn't talking to Suga (you know, that random minor character I made up for comedic purposes). Light massaged his temples. It was going to be a very long day...

XXX

TWO CLUMSY ACCIDENTS AND ESTIMATELY TWENTY FOUR INAPPROPRIATE COMMENTS LATER...

"This isn't right."

"What isn't right?"

"L, you're holding my hand."

"Am I?"

"Yes. Please get the hell off."

"Well, excuse me, princess..."

"Please, for the love of God, get off. And sober up. It's actually starting to freak me out how out of character you are."

"Whatever..."

After finally prying his hand out of L's grip, Light began to walk ahead of L, not too far as to look like he was trying to get away, but close enough to keep the elder boy in his sight. Light found it hard to believe he'd atually wanted the freak back, and the phrase 'Be careful what you wish for,' kept being repeated in his head like there was a small parrot inside his brain, who was trying to make an extremely obvious point. Rubbing his eyes, Light begged a higher power to somehow make the journey home a lot shorter.

As they came up to the small, low-rising bridge that lay in their path, L stumbled and clasped at Light's school shirt sleeve.

"What is it now?"

"Light... I don't feel too good..."

"You don't look too good, either. Not that you ever do."

"Light, not now, I seriously... urrrrrgh..."

At that precise moment, L made a disgusting hacking nose, and proceeded to push Light forward a little and throw up on the pavement. Light's eyes widened a little in shock, his eyebrows raised. However, it took him less than two seconds to quickly change his expression from one of shock to distaste. He wrinkled his nose and grimaced.

"Well, that's embarrassing."

"... Shut up... augh..."

L coughed a few times, and leaned against a wall for a little while, before crouching down to relax his gut a little. Light frowned, feeling a slight bit awkward and out of place, as people walked past, avoiding the mess, and staring at him and L.

"L, you okay?"

"Yeah... yeah, yeah, I'll be fine..."

"Can you get up?"

"Yes, I'll be there in a minute..."

Light, being the uncaring male he was, turned and began to start walking away, thinking L could easily follow. What Light didn't notice was that L, as most drunk or hungover people do when they believe they can achieve something, began to fall, almost before he'd even managed to actually stand up. That was then followed by four events happening.

First, L began to tumble forward.

Then, he smashed head first into Light before pushing the other boy forward and continuing his journey from standing to lying face down on the concrete.

After that, Light kept moving forward against his own will due to gravity and his own lousy reflexes, which didn't really work well unless he was on guard. Which he wasn't at the time.

Then finally, Light found himself traveling over the side of the bridge.

There was a yell and when L looked up, Light had disappeared. Being in an unstable state, it took L a little bit longer to comprehend what had actually happened than usual, and when L finally managed to pull himself up onto the side of the wall, he gazed over the side of the bridge, hoping he wouldn't find anyone down there.

He only saw a crumpled mass lying face up on the rocks of the stream, eyes closed and not moving.

"..."

L stared at the unconscious boy for a bit.

"..."

He stared some more, and frowned deeply.

"I think," he said aloud, "I think I just killed Light."

At that moment, Light groaned a little, unconcious for only a few seconds. L was starting to get a headache, and as Light made the noise, L's hand reached up to the side of his head, and he moaned in displeasure.

"Ugh, even in death you're annoying and loud."

Light said nothing, too scared to move. He opened his eyes a little, still scared to move a limb in case he'd broken something, and scanned the sky and surrounding area above him for someone to shout for help to or a sign that he hadn't fallen too far. He shivered a little as the cold water of the tiny stream that flowed beneath him wet through his shirt and washed against his skin.

"L..."

He called quietly. He didn't want to be too loud, but he wanted to know where L was, or for someone to notice he'd fallen. However, he recieved neither.

"L!"

Light called out, louder this time. A black, spiky bush with eyes peered over at him.

"You're awfully loud for a dead person. Did I do it right?"

"L, help me! You're not usually this dumb!"

Light attempted to move a little, his confidence growing. As soon as he tried to shift his weight, pain shot through his upper body and his ankle.

"Ah!"

"Wait, the dead feel pain now?"

"L, shut up and help me! Sober up already, you moronic rapist buffoon!"

L paused. He wasn't sure whether to be insulted (and if he was, which word was he insulted by?) or surprised that Light had used an underused word like buffoon. Now he thought about it, buffoon sounded like a type of monkey... buffoon, buffalo, baboon!

"L, FOR CHRISTS SAKE! I am getting WET HERE!"

Heh, that's what she said, L thought in English.

"L!"

L sighed, stressed by his increasing headache and burning throat, and began to climb clumsily down the loose rocks that covered the walls of the stream edge towards Light.

"Wait, what are you doing? Get help, you idiot! Don't come down here, you might kill yourself! Or, more importantly, me!"

L shrugged to himself, and sat down next to Light.

"Where does it hurt?"

"Everywhere. I fell off a fucking bridge, L!"

L shrugged again. "Fine, be that way."

L grabbed Light's arm, and pulled. "Hey, what are you...?"

Light was cut short as L pulled the younger boy up and managed to manoeveur Light onto his back. The two (or rather, the one carrying the other one) stood in the corridor under the bridge, while L tried to figure out exactly how they would get back to the road...

XXX

(For those who don't understand L's confusion of words- when he said, wait, I mean nail varnish- he is getting confused between the word manikyua-eki (nail varnish/ nail polish) and mekimeki (to be conspicuous, or to attract attention). Basically he said, "Sore wa mekimeki no youna nioi...". Or something along those lines. Wow, I'm a weaboo.)

I'm sorry this chapter took so effing long, but a lot of crazy shit has happened and not everything I wanted to do could be done. Hope this isn't too late, though... That bit of fluff was weird... a bit unlike me -_- I think Light is very OOC in this. I feel bad...

I would really, really love to have some reviews. They make me want to write faster. So review for me... pretty please?