Well To be honest, I forgot all about this till I received an e-mail from one of you saying that they wanted more. To be honest, I don't know how much time I will have as I am in Uni and I am writing a novel. However, I will do my best. This chapter is one I wrote last year that I found stored on my computer. I didn't proof read it but I figured it was better than nothing. I don't know what the future holds, but we will see. But as you can see, reviews are the most wonderful motivators. Also I went through a stage of thinking personal fanfictions were sort of weird because these are peoples lives we are talking about and some peoples views of these people are tarnished because of these stories - I have come to realise however, that it just stories. Every story is derived from some sense of reality. Some more than others. If they were to feel uncomfortable about it, I would stop of course. Anyways, please do comment.

Till next time - whenever that may be.

Chapter 10:

The sunlight glistened through the crack in the shades of Darren's apartment bedroom. Groaning, he rolled over, burrowing his face deeper into his pillow. It didn't take him long to realise that there was no falling back to sleep now he was awake. Slowly, he managed to move out of his bed and pull on a simple black t-shirt as he meandered into the kitchen. He looked down at his watch that read numbers showing that it was seven o'clock. Yawning, Darren poured himself a cup of boiling water, chucking in some tea leaves shortly after. Lazily, he reached for his laptop and switched it on. No sooner than the screen had flashed on, a number of notifications began to make their way into his inbox. This was no surprise, as just like most mornings, fan-mail from his recent Glee episodes and emails from his manager quickly added themselves to the pile of unanswered emails in his inbox.

This being his first day off in the past few weeks, he decided to finally sort these messages. Grabbing his tea, he pulled his laptop over and sat at the small round glass coffee table that was placed in the centre of the apartments living area. His liked his apartment; it wasn't overly flash but had nice lighting and a view of the city that was better than average. It was close to work and was large enough to have guests; however, it wasn't so spacious that it made the apartment feel empty. At the current point in time, Darren didn't have a roommate. He felt as if he didn't know anyone well enough yet and as excited as he was to be spending time with cast from Glee, he felt awkward due to the fact they had all spent a year in each other's company and he was new to the whole idea of show business. It wasn't that he didn't get along with the people he had met; he was very sociable however, after leaving such a close group of friends in Ann Arbour, he felt a bit lonely.

He started singing 'Teenage Dream' that had been unfortunately stuck in his head for the past few weeks due to the numerous rehearsals he had attended to perfect his premiere on Glee. He ran his hand through his hair, annoyed by the shortness of its length. The copious amounts of gel that had been sleeked through his locks was yet to be removed, even after many attempts of scrubbing viciously at his roots. Pulling out his phone, he decided to call Lauren, a call that he had been delaying for weeks. It was nine o'clock in Chicago meaning that Lauren would be awake. Sighing deeply he picked up the phone. He had internally decided it was better she talk to him before hearing things out of context.

Lauren had been his best friend since the day he had stepped into his first theatre class. Moving from San Francisco was a big step for Darren and being accepted into the University of Michigan was maybe the best situation he could have found himself in. He was running late to class even after promising himself that his time management skills would improve after his many years of late arrivals in high school. Due to his lateness, he had quickly dressed in simple blue jeans, a grey t-shirt and his blue UM hoodie that he had bought in order to fit in with the college vibe. Coming straight from his schooling years in San Francisco, college was quite confronting. He had always been considered to be the kid who always sang at school, or the music nerd due to the fact he had such a high level and broad education in the musical and performing arts. Considering that, he was never short of friends at school due to his easy going and relatable attitude. However, for most students including Darren, the change of environment was to say the least, disorientating. So running late to class wasn't necessarily the best way to start his year as a college freshman. It was rather cold in Michigan, hence the hoodie which Darren still wore frequently to this day. Running into class, he was relieved to see everyone standing around the enormous rectangular empty room, talking casually as if waiting for the theatre teacher. Darren stood awkwardly away from the small groups of people that were talking, feeling as though he was intruding their environment, when his eyes met with a petite girl of about eighteen (despite her shortness that made her seem younger), with short blonde hair who was staring back at him with big brown eyes and a warming smile. Breaking away from the few people she was talking to, she walked up to him with a certain manner of confidence.

"Hi," She said, "You majoring in theatre?"

"Ah, yeah and minoring in musicology and stuff…" Darren replied, now happy to not be standing alone awkwardly.

"Sweet, where are you from?"

"San Francisco, you?"

"Royal Oak, Michigan."

"So…local?"

"Kind of, not really. It's about forty-five minutes from here, an hour by train." She laughed. He couldn't help but to think about how beautiful her laugh was, and how her smile lit up her whole face, and how he knew he could not and would not live now without seeing that smile. Now he had seen her beauty, he knew he was a goner.

"Yeah, I don't really know the area, I have only visited a few times when visiting the campus…"

"That's cool, I'll show you round. Do you know anyone else here?"

"Nope. Well, I know you." He smiled receiving a cheeky smirk back. She was so tiny, yet she seemed to radiate confidence. He knew he would become more confident himself, once he had familiarised himself with his new surroundings.

"No you don't." She replied.

"What?"

"You don't know me." She replied laughing lightly.

"That's true I guess, well let's fix that. To start with, what's your name?"

"Lauren. Lauren Elizabeth Lopez."

"Why did you say your middle name?" She shrugged in reply.

"It seemed appropriate. What's yours?" Darren chuckled in response.

"What, my middle name?"

"Your full name, idiot!" she giggled back at him.

"Darren. Darren Everett Criss." He said chucking in a polite bow.

"Why did you say your middle name?" She retorted with a smirk. He shrugged and showed a cheeky grin in return.

"It seemed appropriate." Lauren laughed in reply.

"Well, come on Darren Everett Criss, you need to meet the people who you will spend nearly every waking hour with for the next four years, at least!"

"You know them all?"

"Are you joking? I have been here for like ten minutes. I know them about as well as I know you!"

"What are you talking about, we are so close!" Darren replied feigning hurt. "How are you meant to introduce me if you know none of them either?"

"Oh just shut up." She said grabbing his wrist and dragging him over to the group that she had left in order to speak with him.

"Everyone, this is Darren." Lauren said. Darren was secretly relieved that she didn't go around introducing him by his full name. "He's from San Francisco and majoring in theatre, so yeah!"

"Hi." said Darren smiling to the group surrounding him.

"Hi, I'm Joe." said a taller buffer looking guy as he extended a hand to shake Darren's own.

"As am I!" said another guy with short blonde hair from beside him.

"Oh, well I am Joe Walker then." The first man said smiling.

"I'm Joe Moses, or Jomo." stated the other Joe.

Darren was quickly introduced to everyone, little did he realise, the majority of this group would later be known as Team Starkid and he would be a founding member. It was over three quarters of an hour before a professor turned up. The teacher was a smallish man with grisly patches of grey hair. Upon entering, he smiled at the group before him.

"Hello new class of 2005. Welcome. Why am I late you ask? Well that is simple. Have you or have you not met your fellow classmates? Have you met someone who you may have in fact been uncomfortable around if you had not talked to before working alongside?" Darren glanced over at Lauren who he found was looking straight back at him grinning. "Well, for the next four years, you and the other theatre classes in this program will be working in close proximity with each other. You will need to know each other, respect each other, and feel each other within this environment. It is a necessity that you become not just a class, but a unit. Like many who have attended this class before you, you will undergo an extremely intense however, extraordinary stimulus and if you stick it out, you will possibly form some of the strongest friendships that you will find in life. Just remember, you all have the same desire and the same passion to learn the art of theatre. Do not become arrogant, but help each other, work with each other so you may create experiences that you will remember forever. Well, that is my introduction; now let's begin!"

That was possibly the best day of Darren's time in college. Ever since, Lauren and Darren have been best friends. It started off just in class, but quickly progressed, and soon Lauren and Darren were inseparable, not to mention Lauren now claimed his UM hoodie to be her own.

Everything was different now. He screwed it up. He just couldn't fight his instincts as he had done since that first day in college. Why did he have to kiss her? He had always wanted to, especially since their kiss on Little White Lie. However, he could not have picked a worse time to do so. After signing a contract with Glee, it was agreed that he had to do as they asked in order to increase the shows publicity. One of these agreements was that he was to act as if he was in a steady relationship. Unfortunately, he was unable to choose who this person would be. Instead, it was suggested that he date his ex, Mia Swier. Somehow, she knew his manager and Darren's manager was aware they were in a brief relationship early in his years in college; therefore, she was chosen to be Darren's public girlfriend. It wasn't hard, they had chemistry and when Darren ended it between them in college, there always felt to be some unresolved feelings between them. However, after his trip to Chicago, Darren approached his manager about the issue. When Darren had originally asked if he could just date Lauren, the company had asked or instructed that this should not happen as Lauren had her own public reputation due to Starkid and if she was to make mistakes through her theatre career, it could affect the shows public reputation. Darren had disagreed however, through his contract, he was unable to refuse. Now he had to face Lauren before the Paparazzi reached her first. A phone call that he had avoided for weeks, but now it was time to face the music so to speak.

Scrolling through his emails, he found one from Lauren. Smiling to himself, he opened it up.

"Hey Big Tv Star,

What's up? It's been a while since we talked. Just watched your episode, it was shitastical and wonderful and splendid. Julia and Jaime said to say they are proud of you, as does Joey cause he is chilling here too (I wonder why? It wouldn't be because he is like desperately in love with Jaime or whatever. Never.). I tried calling, you didn't pick up douchebag. Don't forget us now your big and famous and whatever. Well, call me back at some point okay?

Coolio. Well speak soon idiot.

Xxx Lolo"

A knot in his chest tightened with guilt. The smile slowly dropped off his face as he read it over and over. Ignoring the pain in his chest, he picked up his phone in preparation to dial up Lauren. Her contact picture was beautiful. He remembered taking that photo on that first day in college. It was right after class and he was heading over to his dorm room when he saw the blonde haired girl run up beside him. She was wearing a simple blue top and tights in order to move around easily during theatre classes. She continued to walk beside him in silence until she looked up at him grinning.

"Well, Darren Everett Criss," she started, "I promised I would show you around the beautiful Michigan area! So if you will follow me, there is a lot to see, and so little time." Darren laughed in reply.

"What makes you think I have time?" He said cheekily.

"Well you aren't exactly walking like you have somewhere to go. Besides, you really need to learn your way around."

"Alright then Laur; where to?" Lauren cringed slightly. "What?" asked Darren smiling.

"Don't call me Laur. Bad experiences, bad memories…"

"Yeah?"

"Keeping it simple, my high school boy friend used to call me it…"

"Oh. Didn't end well?" Darren asked curiously before he could stop himself. Lauren's eyes glistened with tears. "Don't worry about it; I was being nosy…"

"No, its fine. You're easy to talk to." Lauren interjected, "No, it didn't end well. He basically told me that if I wasn't moving to Los Angeles with him, then I wasn't worth his time. It doesn't matter now though, it's over." Darren couldn't help but think he sounded like a bit of a jerk and little did he know that he would soon hear many more stories about this mysterious asshole.

"Well, how about Lo'?"

"Lo'?"

"Yeah, short for Lauren, or Lopez?"

"Cool. Yeah. I like it." She said smiling up at him.

"Good. Well are you going to show me around or not?"

"Oh, yeah! Yeah, of course. Well first let's go onto the main circuit." Lauren then showed him around everywhere nearby until they reached their final destination. It was a tall Oak tree with large branches that extended downwards and outwards, covering an extensive area of the park in shade. Lauren was smiling brightly as she ran over to the tree and pressed her hands against the rough bark. She traced some engravings with finger that listed down the tree. Curiously, Darren inspected the carvings to see Laurens name next to numbers counting up from eight to seventeen.

"Lauren?"

"Yeah?"

"What's this?" he said pointing to the list.

"Well, once a year, dad used to bring me to this park just after my birthday to see relatives and it became tradition to carve my age into the tree. It's silly, I know."

"It's awesome." Darren said fiddling with the stray pieces of frayed bark. Lauren gave him a small smile before looking over into the distance. Darren pulled out a small camera that he often carried around for moments such as this. Without Lauren noticing, he took a photograph of Lauren leaning up against the old Oak tree, her hair blowing slightly in the gentle cool breeze. She was picture perfect. Smiling to himself, he slipped the camera back into his pocket. It took him years before he finally agreed to show her the photo, and ever since, he found reasons to use it for his own benefit so he could always remember the confident girl that he met on that first day in college.

It was scary knowing something so beautiful made him feel so sad and remorseful. After several more minutes of resting his finger above the dial button, he plucked enough courage to call her. The phone rang, however, after two and a half ringtones, the phone was sent to voicemail. Sighing deeply, he hung up the phone. Now he had enough adrenaline, he decided he would call Julia instead to make sure Lauren was alright. Julia answered right away.

"Hey Darren, what's up? Long-time no see." Darren took this as a good sign because if Lauren was upset, he was bound to have an earful by now.

"Hey Jules, just called Lauren she didn't pick up. I think she declined my call…"

"Oh yeah, she would've; she was running late to coaching so it wouldn't surprise me."

"Oh ok cool. Nah it's all good, I will give her a call back afterwards."

"She's been waiting for you to call, you know? She gets upset when she sees you didn't contact her. Just because you're all famous now doesn't mean you can just forget about her Dar." Darren bit his tongue.

"Yeah I know; it has been hectic though. Today's my first day off. Anyways Julia, I have to make some other calls, just tell her to call me back."

"Alright, you two are cute together you know." Darren laughed.

"Alright Jules, I have got to go. See you later."

"Bye Darren." Smiling, Darren hung up the phone.

Lazily, he opened back up his emails. He flicked through each one slowly.

"Sales, junk, more junk. Wait… Manager." Quizzically, Darren opened the email, and quickly pictures filled the white space on his computer screen, along with bold letters spelling his own name. Darren's jaw dropped. "Shit. Shit, shit, shit." Darren said under his breath. A picture of him and Mia kissing flashed from different angles as he scrolled down the page. He shot up from his chair, pacing back and forth around the room running his hands through his hair. He stopped suddenly and desperately reached for the phone. He dialled Lauren again, praying that maybe he would reach her before her coaching session was due to start. The phone rang once before going to voicemail and he then understood how bad the situation he had found himself in was. Begging internally for a miracle, he dialled Lauren again and again, however, now her phone redirected him straight to voicemail. How had it become this bad? He didn't want to be with Mia, he wanted Lauren; he needed Lauren. Kissing Mia was an involuntary act that a shabby piece of paper with his signature scrawled along the bottom, forced him to do.

"Lauren. Please pick up." He said quietly. However, once again, he was transferred to voicemail. Slamming his phone on the desk, he began pacing again, running his hands constantly through his curls. His phone began to vibrate on the table, indicating an incoming call. With a sigh of relief he ran and pressed it to his ear. A nervous lump had developed in his throat.

"Lauren?" he quickly blurted out.

"No Dare, its Julia." A tense silence followed the tense introduction.

"Julia, let me explain."

"Darren, please, cut the crap. This obviously is something you have known about for some length of time. No matter the circumstances, you are in the wrong."

"I know." Darren sighed. There was a silence from both ends of the line. After a while, Julia couldn't stand it much longer.

"You honestly don't expect her to react well to this do you? This isn't the first time you have hurt her, not even recently. You are becoming a destructive force and eventually, she is going to get sick of the drama Darren." Darren sighed.

"I know. I just don't know what I can do. To be honest, I expected you to be sterner with me."

"I am not going to waste my breath Darren. I am just disappointed in you. You know? I mean, she hasn't had an easy time what with Mike appearing the other day and the memories just flooding back. I think she just truly thought it was going to get better now." Darren sat up quickly.

"Wait, what? Rewind for a moment there. Mike? Mike came over- the same one that pushed her to the ground? What happened? Did he touch her? I swear if he laid a single finger on her I-" Julia cut him off.

"Seriously, at the moment I don't think you have any right to be over protective of her. We are dealing with it, she is fine. I think you have other things to worry about."

"Her safety will always be my number one concern, Julia." Darren said sternly.

"Well then why don't you explain the magazine?"

"It's part of my contract."

"What?"

"Dating Mia; it's a part of my obligatory contract."

"Darren, isn't that illegal?"

"No, not really. It's for publicity. Besides it's not really a contract - more an agreement that it's better for my image and protection." Julia scoffed through the phone.

"Protection? Darren Criss that is the biggest load of bullshit! Stop making excuses for yourself. You probably just didn't want the commitment. I mean, when had Darren Criss ever held down a relationship for more than two months?"

'Ouch' Darren thought, 'I'm getting that one thrown in my face quite frequently as of late.' Julia was snappy now, it was best to try and justify himself before it got any uglier.

"Julia, that's not true and you know it. Besides, even if I did have feelings for Mia I wouldn't act on them without talking things out with Lauren."

"But you did Darren! You did act on it!" Aggressively Julia hung up the phone leaving Darren in a stunned silence. After allowing himself a moment's recovery, he called Lauren. Three dial tones later, he was redirected to her message bank.

"Shit." Darren cursed aloud to himself. Quickly he tried to redial but was automatically greeted with Laurens cheerful voicemail. Time after time he tried before resorting to messaging her.

'Lo', please, I am sorry. I don't know whether you have seen it yet. If you have, I can explain; call me. If you haven't; please call me'

Darren hung his head in his hands. How did things get so chaotic? He kept having flashes in his mind about Laurens kiss, crumpled shirts, heavy breaths. Boosting himself from the chair, he began to rapidly pace the room. A little over half an hour passed before he called Laurens home phone again. Jaime picked up the phone this time.

"Hey Dare, causing more drama than usual I see." Jaime's voice had more venom than usual but she wasn't yelling.

"Hey Jaime, you understand don't you? It's not what it seems."

"At the moment, I don't know what to think." Darren's eyes welled up slightly. He had to clear his throat before speaking next.

"Look Jaime, I told you it was complicated…" He trailed off as there was a knock on the door. "Hold on Jaime." He got up and crossed to the door, opening it to find the one person who could only make the situation harder: Mia.

"Hey honey," Mia started, kissing Darren on the cheek before walking over and sitting down on the couch.

"Mia, now isn't a great time…"

"Darren! Is that Mia? Oh my God. I seriously do not get you." Darren heard Jaime's voice echo from the phone. There was a click and he knew she had disconnected. Aggressively he clenched the phone and threw it to the floor letting out a growl.

"Woah," Mia said, "Rough morning then?"

"You have no idea." He said walking over to the couch to embrace her in a hug.

"Do you want me to go?"

"Nah, it's all good. I could use the company." She really was a generally genuine person, and despite Darren's feelings for Lauren, he couldn't help but feel attracted to the person Mia had become.

"Wanna talk about it?"

"Nothing really to say. Lauren and I have been a bit complicated as of late. The media from today is not going to help that in the slightest." Mia nodded in agreement.

"I can talk to her and explain if you need me to. We both agreed going into this that it was strictly publicity."

"Mia…" Darren started.

"What?"

"I know that's not the way you feel."

"Okay, it's true. I still have some fond feelings towards you from college." Mia sighed. "But I understand you don't reciprocate the feelings and I am willing to be there and support you with whatever relationship you figure you want." Darren smiled grimly.

"Thanks Mimi." He leaned forward and kissed her on the forehead. "You know, under different circumstances we might have worked. But my mind in all its complexity is an awful thing that has barred me from having those intense feelings for anyone but her." Mia smiled sadly.

"I know."

Another hour later and several messages and unanswered calls to all of Lauren's contact numbers passed, Mia decided she should leave.

"Look Darren, its Lauren, you have chemistry together. Explore it, see what happens. Then maybe out can find what you're looking for, or finally be able to move on with your life and stop sabotaging every potential relationship you find yourself in. If you need me, I am just a phone call away. Bye Darren." As she left, Darren knew she was right. He had forever placed Lauren on a pedestal and one way or another; he had to figure out whether they could work. Desperately, he tried to call Lauren again.

"Darren?" Jaime's voice sounded softer than their previous conversation but he could tell the irritation must be rising. Darren was just relieved someone had picked up.

"Oh thank god! Jaime is that you? Please, put Lauren on." Darren knew the level of desperation in his voice was pathetic.

"No Darren, I'm sorry. I can't do that." Darren was frustrated. If he was just given the time to explain, he knew Lauren would understand.

"Jai, please. I need to talk to her. Please…"

"Fucking hell, Darren!" How could you do this?" Darren's heart broke as he heard intense sobs muffled in the background on Jaime's end of the line.

"Jai, it's not what you think! Please, just let me speak to Lauren."

"No!" Jaime's aggression startled Darren. "No Darren. You promised me!" He was confused and taken aback.

"What-" he started but Jaime cut him off.

"You said she wasn't some 'silly side fling'! That she is 'worth more to you than that'! How can that change in a few weeks Darren. It's unacceptable." Darren was speechless. He had never heard Jaime yell like this. "You said that you had someone at home but Lauren was more important to you! Did you just lie to me? How could you hurt her like this Darren!" Darren realised immediately that Lauren was probably still over hearing their conversation, a furious blush settling in his cheeks. "This is Lauren Lopez. The girl you liked on and off all through-out college. The girl who you spent so many years on, just trying to ask her on a date! All those conversations we had, were they all lies? Every college party, every week since, why do you do this now?" Darren snapped back into reality.

"Jaime, is Lauren there? Can we please not talk about this if she is there."

"Shit." Darren sighed at the realisation Lauren had overheard everything. Embarrassed and guilty, he hardly heard her next remark.

"Darren, don't call back for a while. Okay?"

"Jai-"

"Bye Darren." Darren was greeted with deafening silence.

For a moment he just sat there. Then he chucked the phone to the ground groaning. He wandered into his bedroom, falling with his back against the mattress. He lay there watching the sun until it passed into a state that formed an orangey pink wave of art. He realised he had to make the next move. He understood at that moment, his night was just beginning.

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