Chapter Nine

‡

Bella

I walked into our room and saw Edward sitting on the bed, his elbows on his lap and his beautiful face in his marble hands. I knew this meant that he was deep in thought, most likely concerned about something that was currently bothering him. I slowly walked up behind him, wrapping my arms around his muscular chest before I kissed the back of his head. I gently rested my chin on his shoulder.

It was silent for a moment as we both stood as still as stone. I waited patiently, wishing he would tell me what was wrong. He had been fine when we walked through the door. He had talked with Nessie for a minute when I went to check on Jacob. Maybe she had said something that upset him, although I couldn't imagine what.

"She was thinking about a motorcycle," he finally mumbled, breaking out of his statue-like trance.

I quickly scrambled next to him on the bed, glaring at him furiously. "You know you're not supposed to read her mind!" I whispered sharply.

"She was thinking about a motorcycle," he repeated softly, seemingly unashamed about what he had done.

"Motorcycles? What does that have to do with anything?" I snapped, throwing my hands up in the air in frustration.

"Not motorcycles in general. One motorcycle. When we got home, she was thinking about one specific motorcycle."

I gave him a questioning look, still not understanding the dilemma of our daughter thinking about a meaningless motorcycle.

"She was riding one earlier with some boy," he explained, practically growling as he said the words out loud.

I was silent for a minute as I contemplated my only daughter riding on the back of a boy's motorcycle. I supposed I should be as upset as Edward. Parents typically got upset about these kinds of things. However, I could not help but feel somewhat ecstatic; my daughter was finally behaving like a teenager instead of the young adult that she mentally and emotionally was. These kinds of spontaneous, immature actions were exactly why we moved back to Washington in the first place. So she could live a normal life until we were forced to change her into one of us.

I knew it would take a lot of convincing on my part to make Edward agree with me that we should not react to this situation. He had always been so protective of her ever since we moved back to Washington. I think he was afraid that we were going to lose her before she was changed and had the opportunity to rediscover who she truly was. What he did not realize was that by limiting her freedom, we were defeating the entire purpose of the move.

"Are you sure?" I asked quietly.

"Positive. It was with that boy that she studied at the library with," he replied softly. I watched as his hands began to clench into tight fists as his mind probably filled with vivid images; Nessie's private memories that were in her own head where she innocently assumed no one would discover them.

"Was she thinking about him too?"

"No. She had started to, but then you came back in after checking on Jacob. What kind of father would I be if I let her ride on one of those?"

"A father that can't read his daughter's mind. You promised, Edward. You promised that you would stay out of her thoughts. She deserves privacy."

He closed his eyes and began to shake his head slowly, a sign that he was extremely frustrated. But I didn't care; I was not backing down until he calmed down and sincerely promised that he was never going to read her mind again. "It's so hard to tune her out when her mind is right there for me to read," he explained, though he knew that this would never be justifiable in my eyes.

I placed my hand on his cheek, gently tuning his chin to force his topaz eyes to look at me. "But you know you can do it, Edward. You're strong; you can resist anything. If that wasn't true, I certainly wouldn't be here."

He shook his head again, his expression grim as the memory came forth. I knew he did not like to think about what it used to be like when I was human. Thinking about how well he did resisting me did not make him feel strong as if it would other vampires. I knew he was saddened by the fact that he had been forced to try so hard to not kill the love of his life. "I'm not just going to sit by and let her get into an accident…" he said through gritted teeth.

"But she wouldn't die! Yes, she could get hurt, but she would heal fast. We're so lucky; we can't lose her that easily." I gracefully moved behind him again and wrapped my arms around his tense neck.

He sighed deeply as the muscles instantly relaxed. "But still…"

"But nothing. She has the right to her own thoughts."

He bowed his head and nodded in agreement. Suddenly, he shot his head back up and turned to look at me, his eyes alight with a new idea. "But if I catch her riding it…"

I shook my head, causing him to scowl. "If you catch her riding it, you still shouldn't do anything. We always tell her we want her to have a normal life, to make friends and have fun, all the things teenagers her age should be doing, but then we lock her up. I mean, I rode a motorcycle, and I didn't get hurt…"

The angry glare that instantly washed over his face as he remembered my motorcycle experience with Jake made me realize that this wasn't the best example I could have given.

"She'll be fine," I said forcefully, quickly kissing him, hoping to change the subject.

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't have invaded her privacy like that. I want to meet this boy though," Edward said softly as he used his finger to slowly trace the features of my face. "I want to make sure he is a good guy if they decide to…" he trailed off, probably not wanting to finish the sentence in case the final word would make it come true.

"…date," I said it for him, the word that we both feared but had never discussed. I had never realized before why we never talked about Nessie getting a boyfriend. She was absolutely gorgeous, and I didn't just think that because I was her mother. After all, she was half vampire. However, it had never occurred to me that she could one day have a boyfriend. "Do you think they will?" I asked softly.

"I don't know. Possibly. I think she likes him a lot."

I thought about Jacob. The one subject we had never discussed and never would discuss. Although I had accepted it, Jacob imprinting on our daughter was something that I could not fully wrap my mind around. When it had happened, he told us that he would be anything that Nessie needed him to be: Protector, friend, brother. The thought of him one day possibly being her husband had crossed my mind plenty of times, although I did not know if she felt that way toward him.

I realized if their relationship flourished, it would be extremely unorthodox, especially after Nessie is changed into a full vampire. But in a way, it made sense; he would continue to stay the same age because he would constantly have a vampire around, which would cause him not to grow older. They could be together forever, physically young but mentally and emotionally maturing with every passing day.

He suddenly reached up and touched my cheek, bringing me out of my immediate thoughts but forcing an old memory to come forth—the memory of the first time we kissed. I instantly bent down and kissed him with as much passion as I had that day, when he had been practically forbidden but completely irresistible. I thought back to what it was like at the beginning, when I was all his but didn't know it, completely terrified by the thought of him leaving me. I let the memory flood through me, increasing my passion.

He lay down on the bed, gently pulling me with him. I pressed my body to his, inhaling his aroma as if I had never smelled anything as sweet.

I began to feel a familiar dread, thinking that he might disappear beneath my lips if I was not careful. At the beginning I had been insecure, constantly afraid of what I might lose instead of focusing on what I had. What I had was forever; what I had was secure. I knew it, but I had not truly known it. The day I finally understood was the day he placed that ring on my finger, vowing that he would be mine forever.

There was a knock at the door downstairs, something our impeccable hearing immediately picked up, and Edward seemed surprised—apparently he had been too consumed in me to read the mind of whoever was at the door.

"Who is it?" I asked him.

He frowned, annoyed that we had been interrupted. "It's Alice."

"Oh, come on. We can take ten minutes out of our sleepless night to talk to her," I said with a laugh.

We quickly ran downstairs and threw open the door, revealing Alice's smiling face.

"Hi again!" she said sweetly, throwing her arms around both of us as she kissed our cheeks.

Renesmee appeared at the top of the stairs, squealing with delight when she saw who was at the door. She immediately ran down the staircase into her arms, hugging her aunt tightly.

Edward sighed. "Alice. Nessie was just going to bed; it's a school night."

"I'm going, Dad," our daughter said, annoyance flooding her sweet voice. "I just wanted to say hi."

"Good night, Ness," Alice told her. "I'll come by to see you tomorrow."

"Good night, sweetheart," I called after her. She called out another 'good night' to the three of us before disappearing around the corner.

As Nessie walked back up the stairs, Alice sniffed the air, making a disgusted face because of the repulsive odor.

"Is Jacob here?" she whispered, looking around in search of an answer to her question.

"Yes, he's asleep in the living room," I replied.

"Alice, why don't you tell my wife why you are here." His grin could not have gotten any larger and he had a curious, mischievous look in his eye. Apparently, he liked what Alice was thinking. I looked at him questioning and then turned to Alice, who was shaking her head in disapproval.

I glanced at both of them questioningly. "What's going on?"

"Well, Bella, I'm just going to get right to the point," Alice began, her voice as sweet as always. "Esme and I were speaking with each other and we decided that it would be best if Edward was a part of the search party for that vampire."

"I thought Emmett and Rosalie were taking care of it..."

"Well, after you left, Jasper got jealous that they were going to have all of the fun. And then Carlisle wanted to join in. We figured it wouldn't be fair if Edward didn't get the same opportunity."

I turned to Edward. "It's not that I don't want you to join your father and brothers. But I worry about Nessie. I can take care of her, I know, but I prefer if you are here too. Just in case. We don't know what we're dealing with."

"How about Ness and you come over to Carlisle and Esme's house for a sleepover?" She paused thoughtfully, scrunching her nose. "Well, I suppose Nessie would be the only one sleeping. But it will still be quite fun, don't you think? I'm sure Rosalie would leave the hunt to the boys in that case."

I supposed that it was a good idea. Despite everything, I knew Renesmee truly loved seeing her family. "Sure. That sounds like a good idea," I admitted with a sigh.

‡

The next day was spent studying for all of the entrance exams that we were going to take the following week. I was finally excited about going to college; it would give us something different to do during the day. Usually, our weekdays were spent alone together. Sometimes, we would stay home all day and sometimes we would drive or even run to other cities to shop and explore. Although our days were a monotonous, we always had a wonderful time simply being with one another. However, I was ready for a change in our daily activity.

That evening, Nessie and I packed our things before the three of us left for Carlisle and Esme's house. Although she did not say anything about the subject, I knew Nessie was extremely excited. The entire car ride was filled with talking and laughing as we simply spent time in each other's company. It was from moments such as these that I knew my family was going to be okay until the truth was finally revealed. It was from moments such as these that I knew despite everything, we were happy.

Edward gave Nessie a long hug goodbye. She had been told that he, along with her uncles and grandfather, were going on a camping trip. Jasper, Emmett, and Carlisle met Edward outside and said goodbye to Nessie and me. Finally, Edward took me into his arms and gave me a long, passionate kiss. He softly whispered his love for me in my ear, kissing me once again when he was finished. Then Carlisle, Emmett, Jasper, and Edward got into the car and drove off in search of the unwanted vampire that was in our midst.

Nessie gave me a weak smile before we made our way up to the glowing house. We were immediately greeted at the door by Alice who as usual was full of her usual zealous energy.

"Oh, I know what we can do first!" she chirped excitedly as she sat down on the floor, prompting the four of us to do the same. "Let's talk about everything that has been happening to us lately. Nessie, you go first."

Nessie laughed softly at her aunt's enthusiasm. She pulled her thick, curly hair out of her face with a hair tie.

"How are your friends?" Esme asked.

"They're well," her granddaughter replied softly.

The friends Esme was referring to were the first group of people Nessie met when we moved. At first, she had gone many places with them. However, when she realized how little they had in common, she suddenly stopped trying. I knew she sat with them at lunch, but now I wasn't even sure if this was still the case. With a pang of sadness, I realized how little I knew about my own daughter. I realized the opposite was true as well; she knew so little about me.

"I did meet a boy..." she confessed, her cheeks flushing with pink.

I pretended like this was new information, although I was surprised that she would share it so freely. "You didn't tell me that..."

She shrugged. "It just happened yesterday."

"Oh, Nessie's going to have her first boyfriend!" Rosalie exclaimed, throwing her arms around her niece.

Nessie's cheeks turned even more red at her aunt's excited outburst. "No it's not like that. We're friends. Just friends."

"Well, just friends or otherwise, we want to meet him as soon as possible," Alice said firmly.

Nessie simply nodded and then quickly changed the subject to Rosalie's upcoming vacation with Emmett.

As the night went on, I slowly turned my gaze to my daughter. She had apparently done the same—her sparking brown eyes immediately met mine. She gave me a small smile, expressing that she loved me. Taking her hand in mine, I squeezed it gently, bringing it up to my lips to gently kiss it. As her hand brushed my cheek, I instantly saw a dozen tiny visions in my mind. She was going to school, walking quickly as if it was a place of escape. Then she hugging Jacob, clinging to him tightly. The last picture would forever stay in my memory. It was some boy, just the back of his dark brown hair, standing next to a red motorcycle. Every single image was of perfect quality, as if I had been there, looking through Nessie's eyes. Perfect pictures memories.

As I let her hand go, I realized what had just happened—Nessie had been using her gift without knowing it. She was just using her amazing power that I had never thought I would be able to see again until she was reunited with her memories. And apparently, she had wanted to share those memories with me; her power would not have worked if she did not have some desire use it. Why she chose to keep things inside her head and heart instead of expressing them, I had no idea. But at least now I knew that she wanted to. And without knowing it, she had.

I used my vivid recollection to replay the memories inside my head once more.