Hi guys! Sorry this took so long for me to update. I've been lazy and just dealing with school. Ps: I'm sort of crossing shows in this chapter? Also sorry for leaving a near death cliffhanger.. just hold on tight, things are gonna be a little ugly. Please enjoy and don't forget to leave reviews! :)

I'm in the ambulance sitting next to Lydia. Her blood is all over my shirt, my arms, my hands.

I can't stop crying, I'm scared, scared for her life.

I shouldn't be crying. I should be strong, positive, supportive. But I'm not.

The paramedics are checking her bullet wounds. I don't exactly know what's going on but I keep staring at Lydia, tightly holding her hand.

Her face is so pale and cold, her eyes are shut. And I keep looking at her beautiful face hoping things don't go bad. Praying that things don't go bad.

I feel tears streaming down my face but I don't bother cleaning them. Did I foreshadow this? I'm so stupid. Everything was so unorganized and unplanned.

I caused this. This is all my fault. I'm losing my mind. Lydia wouldn't be dying right now if I hadn't fought with those three guys.

I can't think straight.

"She's losing a lot of blood." One of them says. I shut my eyes and pray.

Suddenly, a machine starts beeping. That beeping sound where somebody is nearly dying.

"Oh shit, she's going into cardiac arrest." The paramedics move quickly and grab a defibrillator, puts both paddles on Lydia's chest.

Paramedic Guy #1 checks her pulse and shakes his head then gives a look to the other guy.

"CHARGE TO 100!" He yells as he's ready to do his job. The other paramedic guy gives him a confused look. "WE'RE LOSING HER. CHARGE TO 200!"

Losing her? I shake my head, this is too much.

"CLEAR!"

Lydia's body shakes up and jumps. The paramedics close their eyes and shake their head.

"Come on Lydia, come on." I mutter.

"AGAIN." Paramedic Guy #2 yells. "CHARGE TO 300!"

Paramedic Guy #1 does so. "CLEAR." I can't look at this so I turn around and close my eyes as I hear Lydia's body jump.

The beeping sound turns to a steady sound.

"We got a heartbeat?!"

I turn around and Paramedic Guy #2 is checking Lydia's chest with his stethoscope. He takes a huge breath and smiles, "Yeah."

I lightly smile and kiss Lydia's hand and shake my head.

"She's still unconscious. I don't understand." One of them whispers.

The ambulance stops and quickly the paramedics get Lydia out. I follow them, still holding Lydia's hand not trying to let go.

We're running inside, until we get to a certain section full of busy doctors. They look at us shocked and crazy.

"Lydia Martin, she's a detective, was shot twice on the abdomen, specifically on the liver and the large intestine. Was in cardiac arrest just a few minutes ago. Lost a lot of blood and is still unconscious." The paramedic explains.

"OKAY OKAY SOMEBODY PAGE MEREDITH GREY AND SET UP AN O.R AS SOON AS POSSIBLE!" A tall man yells at everybody as they move Lydia into one of their rolling beds.

"I'm sorry, but you can't be in this area anymore." He says waiting for the elevator.

An attractive woman, blonde, not too old or young runs towards us. Her eyes go wide and big when she looks at my shirt.

I look down and forget I'm literally covered of Lydia's blood.

"Are YOU hurt?" He asks as he looks down as well.

I shake my head, "No, I'm fine. I'm fine." I can't take my eyes off at Lydia.

"Son, you have blood on your face." He then turns around, "WILSON GET THIS MAN CLEAN!" He then nods at me.

The elevator door opens and they start moving fast until I grab the female doctor.

"Please. Please just.. just keep her alive. I swear, please just keep her alive." I cry.

She nods at me and takes a look at Lydia. "I'll try to keep you updated." The elevator doors close.

The younger doctor looks at me lightly frowns and rubs my shoulder.

And like that, for some reason, I let it all out. I collapse on the floor and cry my eyes out. I cry every emotion I'm feeling. I can't think straight. I look down my shirt, Lydia's blood, touch it and continue crying.

"Um, hey.. calm down." She kneels down next to me, "She's in good hands. Doctor Hunt and Doctor Grey are amazing and one of the best." She slightly smiles at me.

I don't say anything but nod and wipe my tears.

"Wait right here. I'm going to get you some clean scrubs." She gets up quickly and jogs to a room.

She comes back minutes later.

"You looked like a size medium. Hope they fit." She hands me blue pants which are scrubs and a white shirt. "Go into that room on your left to change. You can hand me your clothes after."

"Thanks." I say and she smiles.

I walk into a 'on-call room' and close the door. The room has bunk beds and a small desk, it's a pretty big room.

I look down to my shirt and look at the bright stained blood. I take it off and hold it for a second. The upper top of my pants are covered of blood too. Jesus, it looks like I took a blood bath. This is all Lydia's blood. She.. lost so much.

Before I start thinking other stuff I quickly change and throw the bloody clothes away before I walk out.

It's been exactly two hours since I've been here. It's nearly midnight, desperately waiting for some news, any news actually, but nothing.

These scrubs Doctor Wilson got me are a bit uncomfortable. I'm glad Doctor Hunt made me change, I don't know how I would have stand it to be covered of her blood.

Kira immediately came once Doctor Wilson called her and she hasn't left my side at all. Sergeant Parrish and Captain Holt are here as well, but I haven't spoken with them. Mostly Sergeant Parrish.

I couldn't explain to Kira what exactly happened, I feel guilty. But that's where came in and gave her all the information.

She didn't break down like me, or cry at all. She's a lot stronger than me, I guess. Kira's head is resting on my shoulder and tightly holding my hand.

We're waiting for anything. Any updates, but nothing. I'm losing my god damn mind.

"I spoke with Lydia today at your guys' office. And I told her. I told her to stay away from Messina. I told her to be safe. I told her to not get hurt. I told her Stiles." She furiously shakes her head and sighs.

I frown. "It's my fault she's like this. If I didn't.. If I didn't fight those guys.. maybe we would have been safe."

"No don't say that. You were defending yourself from whatever was about to happen. Lydia knows how to fight. She was just seconds late from escaping Messina's arms." She puts her arms around my shoulders.

I shake my head and my eyes begin to water.

"Don't cry anymore Stiles. If you start crying again, I swear, I will lose it. We can't be crying. Things are going to turn out to be okay. Everything will be okay." Her voice cracks as she looks at me.

"What if they don't turn out to be okay?!"

"Just be positive." Kira then puts her head back into my shoulder.

"Um, Detective?" Doctor Grey says.

I quickly get up from my seat and jog towards her. "How is she? Is she okay?"

She slightly smiles and I take that as a good sign. "We had difficulties during her surgery, but she's alive."

Kira and I take a huge breath. I cover my face with my hands, thanking God that she's alive.

She lightly smiles but it goes away, "Look, Detective Stilinski. There's just one flaw. Lydia, she was really strong and made it alive. That's all that matters really," she looks down at some papers.

"But the difficulties we had in surgery, was that she kept losing a lot more blood. Insanely a lot of blood. We are going to run some tests, of course, but right now, she's deeply unconscious."

"What do you mean, deeply unconscious? Isn't that-" I quickly shut up and my eyes go wide. I furiously start shaking my head.

"Lydia is in a coma." She says sadly yet very blunt.

"A COMA?!" Kira says loudly and shockingly. She begins to cry her eyes out.

"Yes. I'm sorry, I'm deeply sorry. She's unconscious right now. We just have to patiently wait for her to wake up." She sighs.

I'm still very speechless. I can't speak. Lydia Martin, my Lyds, is in a coma. Just hours ago, I told her I love her and now she may never wake up.

"How is she in a coma?! How does she end up being in a coma?!" I raise my voice as it starts to crack. "How.." I grab my hair and squat down.

"We are going to run some tests. Everything seems to be fine besides that. I'm very sorry. Meanwhile, you guys can come and spend time with her. Are you the husband?" She looks at me.

Doctor Grey is staring at me then touches my arm, "Detective?"

"I'm the boyfriend." I quickly say. "And her partner."

She nods then looks at Kira, "And you?"

"Sister." She cries.

"Is there any way you can contact your Mom? Dad?" Doctor Grey asks.

Kira shakes her head. "She, we-we have no family. It's just me and her. But," she cleans her tears, "I'll contact a few close friends."

She nods slowly. "You guys are welcomed to stay here. If more people come, I will put you guys as her first priority list. Only three people at a time as well. I'll be back in about 5 to 10 minutes to take you to her room."

rubs my shoulders and sadly smiles. I watch as she walks away. Kira is crying harder and walks to the restroom. My eyes are starting to water. I breathe loudly and stand up but keep my head down. I hear footsteps behind me.

"Stiles." It's Captain Holt. "Any news?"

I can't even speak. "Sh-She, she's unconscious." My voice cracks as I whisper. I start crying again.

Captain Holt grabs my arms and pulls me up. "Stiles. What's going on."

"SHE'S IN A COMA. SHE'S IN A COMA." I yell. I start sobbing, crashing into a wall.

I feel Captain's eyes on me.

He grabs my face up with both of his hands then points his fingers at me as if he was ordering me to do something, "You do not get to break down. You do not get to fall apart. Not when there's still a chance. And there still is a chance, okay? Lydia is strong, she'll wake up. Okay Stiles?"

I nod fast, "Okay, okay."

Behind Captain I see Malia and Isaac run their way towards me. Their worried faces, I don't know how to break it to them. They look like they just woke up too, all messy with sweatpants.

"Stiles, if you need time off from work, you got it. I know how really close you are with her." He hugs me and leaves me with Malia and Isaac.

"WHAT HAPPENED!? Kira called us crying, are things okay? How's Lydia?!" Malia says.

"Detective Stilinski. You can come and see Lydia now." Doctor Grey is standing near some stairs. Kira walks out the bathroom and runs towards Malia and gives her a big hug.

Isaac stares at me just waiting for me to speak. I shake my head. "She's.. she's alive….."

"But she's not awake. We have to wait for her to wake up, she's in a coma." Kira explains, she's more calm.

Malia looks confused and Isaac shuts his eyes and sighs.

"Coma? But why? HOW? What happened!?" Malia is rambling. I'm about to explain what happened but Kira grabs my arm.

"Go with and see Lydia. I'll tell them, I'll tell them what happened." She slightly smiles and so do I.

Malia looks like she's about to cry and Isaac has his head down.

I walk away from them and go with Doctor Grey. I feel like my stomach dropped, I have butterflies in my stomach and it's not the good kind.

"Have you heard of reflex reactions?" she asks.

"No." I reply as we walk into a hall.

"Basically, we consider reflex reactions like stiff muscles and tendons as communication patterns that we can relate through. Like if they're eyes twitched or moved or their fingers? We learn to interact with patient's nonverbal language and to respond in tune with their communication styles."

I don't say anything.

"What I'm trying to say is you can touch her and talk to her. Actually, take advantage of that. In some cases, it actually helps the patient to recover and we get progress." She says.

"I will." I mutter. We stop at a room. I'm nervous. Very scared to see her.

"Room 302. All yours." She opens the door and I see her. Immediately I want to hug her, hold her into my arms, and kiss her, but I don't. I stand still and I feel tears running through my cheeks.

I slowly walk my way to her. She doesn't look pale anymore. She has her normal color again. She has all these breathing tubes around her face. She's got a few needles stuck on her arms.

Doctor Grey sadly smiles and closes the door behind us. "I know it looks a bit scary, so I understand if you don't want to be in here right now."

I put my hands up disagreeing with her statement.

She nods, "Before I called you over, I went to run some tests to question about her being in a coma in a situation like this."

I pout my lips and look at Lydia sadly. Doctor Grey starts talking, "By any chance did she, did she hit her head on the ground before she got shot?"

I think about how I held her in my arms as she got shot. Her blood quickly staining all my clothes and dripping on the pavement.

"I ran as fast I could to her. She hit the ground pretty hard…." I sigh and cover my face. Will she ever wake up? This is a fucking nightmare.

We both stay silent for a few seconds until she speaks up, "Stiles, I'll be back no longer than an hour. I'll come back with test results of Lydia."

"Thank you." I smile. Doctor Grey nods and closes the door shut.

I grab the chair, pull it towards her and sit down. I take a huge breath. I'm trying to be calm as possible, but it's too difficult seeing her like this.

I look at all the machines and realize how without them she wouldn't be breathing. I can't believe all this happened. I still can't fucking believe it.

Lydia looks so peaceful sleeping. I smile down at her and kiss her forehead. My eyes are too red and heavy from crying all night but I feel them water again.

"You." I shake my head.

"You're everything." I pause and grab her hand. "I love you. And I'm not gonna stop loving you."

Tears are rolling down my cheek. "I'm not leaving your side at all. I'm going to be right here, waiting for you to heal and wake up because I know you will." I smile big.

"Lydia, I can't live without you. I don't want to live without you." I clean a few tears on my cheek.

"I don't, I don't even want to see a world without you."

I rest my head on her hand then grab it to my lips and I start mumbling. "Please wake up. I need you here. Please. You're the best thing that's ever happened to me. Ever. And you can't just leave me like that."

"I just got you." My voice cracks and I cry as I look up at her once more. I clear my throat take another huge breath and continue, "Please. Please. Please. Please." I stop and take a good look at her face. "Please, Lydia," I pause, "Don't leave me."

I rest my head near her small body and close my eyes. I hold her hand tightly as I let myself cry once more.

* A week goes by*

I quickly wake up. How long have I slept? I close my eyes slowly and sigh. I look at Lydia, sadly smile at her. She still hasn't woke up.

The monitor is beeping slowly. I hear the door open.

"Stiles, it's been a week. You barely sleep or eat. You should probably go home at some point." Malia's squeezes my shoulder as Isaac pats hit slowly. They

"Hi." Isaac replies.

"I go home when Lydia does."

Malia shakes her head and rolls her eyes, "Where's Kira?" She asks.

"Uh, Scott picked her up so they can go eat. They'll be back soon."

"Have you heard any news?" Isaac questions.

"No." I pause and look at Lydia. "I mean only that she's fine and stable. And still breathing." I tell them. "She moved her fingers just last night, it was amazing!" I smile.

"That's good. It's something." Malia says. We all nod.

"I didn't want to ask but," Isaac says seriously, "Have you heard anything about Messina? What's up with your work schedule. You know Stiles, you need rest. And sleeping here is not rest."

I sigh and stretch my arms.

"Messina ended up paralyzed actually. From his chest down, the judge still sent him to prison since he had many criminal records and murders," I take a sip of water and look back at Isaac.

"And me. Well, Captain Holt told me to take all the time I need. And all that time.. I'm going to be with Lydia. I'm not gonna leave her side at all. I want to be here when she wakes up. I want to be here."

"I'm pretty sure Lydia will be telling you to go home and get some rest and to stop being so stubborn!" Malia yawns and Isaac just smiles lightly.

"That does sound like my Lyds." I look at Lydia and sigh.

We stay silent for a few minutes. Isaac turns on the TV and Malia reads some magazine.

I like to hold Lydia's hand. It's warm and their squishy. Since last night, I hope that she'll eventually move her eyes other than her fingers. I kiss each of her fingers lightly and move her hair a bit.

Suddenly out of nowhere the monitor starts beeping like crazy and Lydia's body start trembling and jumping.

"Oh my god! Oh my god!" Malia yells. I stand up really fast. I try to yell out for help but no words come out of my mouth. I'm too shocked to do anything.

"HELP! My, my my friend's coding!" Isaac yells.

"THEY SAID SHE WAS STABLE?" I yell. "LYDIA." I grab Lydia's arms as she continues to tremble. Oh fuck, this can't be happening.

Malia cries into Isaac's arms and they both turn around.

The monitor is beeping like crazy. "Lydia, oh my god bab-"

"I need the room!" Doctor Owen runs to Lydia. "Just go! I need the room!"

"How can she be seizing?!" He yells.

Doctor Wilson is by his side helping Lydia breathe. "She has no heart rhythm!"

I'm scared. I can feel my anxiety reaching to me. This is all overwhelming and scary.

I hear footsteps running behind me and it's Doctor Grey. She immediately runs to Lydia and checks her pulse.

"Start compression. NOW!" She orders.

I watch as they do their job. My hands are getting sweaty, I can feel sweat running down my face.

"Epi push. Epi." Doctor Owen yells.

"HAND ME THE PADDLES!" Doctor Grey screams and I watch as Wilson hands them to her.

I feel like vomiting.

Some nurse sadly looks at us and closes the door. I walk as slow as I can near the wall.

All of a sudden I can't breathe. I turn around and look at Isaac with wide eyes. I can't fucking breathe.

I try to exhale but I can't. My heart is beating really fast.

Everything is turning blurry. I can't breathe, I can't breathe, I can't breathe.

I'm crying and it's so hard to breathe.

"STILES!" I hear Scott yell.

I'm having a panic attack.

I hit the wall and fall down. Everything is blurry all I see is Scott and Kira's faces.

"Oh fuck." I think that was Isaac.

"I can't, I can't.. I can't.. breathe."

I sit on the floor trying to grab something to hold onto. Something that can keep me grounded.

I'm going to lose Lydia.

Thinking about Lydia makes me more anxious and worried and I cry more.

"Somebody get ice! ICE CUBES!" Malia's voice echoes. "A bag or something!"

I'm going to lose Lydia. Lydia is going to die.

"Bro, Stiles, bro, come on, deep breathing man. Just like we've practiced."

"Lyd- Lyds.."

"Lydia is going to be fine." Kira raises her voice. She's lying. The look of Isaac and Malia's faces tell me things aren't okay.

Malia puts ice cubes on my hand and immediately I feel some sort of relaxation.

The ice cube is obviously cold and she keeps her hand in mine.

I try to take a deep breath. Inhale, exhale.

Kira hands Scott a paper bag then hands it to me. "Here. Slow down."

Scott is rubbing my back and I close my eyes as I try to take some air.

I breathe in and breathe out into the paper bag.

"Lydia." I ask.

Scott looks down. "They are doing the best they can Stiles."

I shake my head furiously. "I don't understand. I don't.."

"I know. Me neither." Kira sighs.

"Thank you guys." I look at everybody's worried faces. "That was really smart of you Malia. The ice-cube method, I really never knew about that."

She sort of smiles and pats my shoulder.

"We shouldn't be here." Scott gets up. "You, shouldn't be here. You're.. you're not okay Stiles."

"Obviously I'm not fucking okay. My girl is right in there," I point towards the room, "dying! She's fucking dying!" I raise my voice which cracks and squint my eyes.

"Don't say that." Kira mutters.

My eyes began to water, "I just don't understand how that's happening. She was stable, she was okay, she was perfectly fine! SHE MOVED HER FINGERS JUST YESTERDAY?! THIS CAN'T BE HAPPENING!"

Malia and Isaac come closer to me.

"No. Don't... please, thank you for everything. I just.. I can't think straight." I get up with the help of Isaac and Scott. Then before I let them speak I walk away. I walk away from them and leave.