So… Reviews are little to none, (with the exception of Sheepish. And guest reviewer BJ) and it's discouraging, because nothing is motivating me to continue this story, and I really want to finish it. So please keep reviews coming, it makes me happier than you think.
Chapter 10
Amanda's eyes slipped open the next morning, a bliss like state taking over her body. She woke up well rested, comfortable, for the first time in what felt like years. She buried her face into the pillow and inhaled the familiar scent. Olivia.
Her eyes widened for a second, realization set in. She was in Olivia's bed. She turned a bit and saw that the spot next to her was empty. Golden rays of sunlight dotted the room, and she relaxed back into the softness. She slept well, and she had a feeling it was because of how safe she felt when she was near Olivia.
She wanted to thank the older woman. She wanted to get up, walk into the living room or kitchen or wherever Olivia was, and hug her.
Nobody put up with Amanda as much as the other woman did, and for that, she was thankful.
She inhaled slowly, then exhaled before sitting up, resting back on her palms. It was only a few moments before a slight knock on the door interrupted her thoughts, and Olivia pushed the door open, resting her shoulder against the frame. "How are you feeling this morning?" Her voice was soothing and void of any judgment or resentment.
"Better.. Haven't slept like that in.. a while."
Olivia smiled, "Good, I'm glad," She paused, openly taking in the sight before her. It felt very domestic and intimate, and they both craved it. "Noah and I made breakfast. Feeling up for some pancakes with assorted berries?"
"He know I'm here?"
"Not yet, he's watching some educational cartoons. Figured I'd let you sleep. If he knew, you'd have been up hours ago." She chuckled, moving to the bed to sit next to the younger woman. "Amanda… What happened last night?"
Amanda blushed, feeling embarrassed about her behavior and actions. "Just.. just a rough night.. I'm sorry I-"
Olivia cupped her cheek, shaking her head softly, "Don't apologize honey, I just wanna know what caused it. I'm glad you came here instead of doing anything that could harm you or cause a setback."
Her skin tingled where her boss' hand was resting, and she felt goosebumps form on her arms and legs. Olivia did things to her that she didn't know she was capable of feeling.
"Liv, I know I haven't been the easiest to handle lately, so thank you for.. y'know.. puttin' up with me."
"It's my pleasure."
Amanda leaned in, needing the contact with Olivia she'd gotten last night, needing to feel the older woman's lips against hers. It was overwhelming.
She cupped both of the older woman's cheeks and pressed her lips against the pair in front of her. She'd never grow tired of kissing Olivia. She'd never not want to.
Olivia exhaled softly into Amanda's mouth as they kissed, lips parting, tongues connecting.
Amanda tried to stay calm, tried keeping her thoughts on the woman she was kissing, and nothing else. It was just kissing, nothing more had to happen. It was just Olivia.
For the first time in her life, she felt the need to stop herself, not someone else. The kiss grew heated, and when she heard Olivia moan lowly, she knew it was time to taper down.
She drew her lips away from Olivia's, instead dragging them down the older woman's chin, nipping lightly at the skin under her jaw before resting her head on a strong shoulder.
"God, Olivia.. This is so new for me-"
"Did I get too carried away?" Olivia cut in, breathing slightly labored.
"No, no. I was.. I just.. I've never felt this kind of.. need and it's overwhelming. I needed to stop."
Olivia pulled away, holding Amanda's shoulders. they locked gazes, and Amanda couldn't help but glance at the other woman's kiss swollen lips.
Beautiful.
"Please tell me if we go too fast for you.. The last thing I want is for you to feel pressured or rushed."
"I promise I will tell you if we go too fast."
"Good." Olivia nodded once, biting her lip lightly before letting out a breath. "Why don't you come out and join my son and I for a sugary breakfast?" She smirked, brushing a stray of blonde hair away from the younger woman's eye.
"I'd love to. Just let me freshen up and I'll be right out."
"Okay. We'll be waiting." Olivia placed a quick kiss on the corner of Amanda's mouth before leaving.
Amanda couldn't stop her eyes from traveling appreciatively to the slight sway of the older woman's hips as she walked out.
Controlling these new feelings was proving to be harder than she thought.
…..
"MANDA?"
Amanda smiled at the shocked expression on Noah's face, mouth full of fruit as he spoke.
"Hi bud." She ruffled his hair and sat down next to Olivia, who was smiling too.
He chewed quickly and swallowed, setting his fork down, "Ware you come fom?" He didn't let her answer before continuing, "We play puzzle after breffust?"
"Baby, why don't we let her eat? C'mon, eat your blueberries for mommy." Olivia commanded softly, sipping her hot tea. She arched an eyebrow and smirked at Amanda.
"Sure we can, little cub. But we gotta eat all our breakfast so mommy is happy!" Amanda whispered loudly, conspiratorially.
He giggled, shoveling another bite into his mouth. "Mommy is not YOUR mommy! She my mommy!"
Amanda would be lying if she said she wasn't truly happy in this moment. She didn't know it only took a breakfast with two people she cared about to make her forget all the shit that was wrong with her and her life. She leaned forward glancing at the older woman who watched on in amusement, and the back at Noah. "Well if she isn't my mommy, than what is she?"
"Mommy your friend." He replied, as if to say duh.
Amanda felt Olivia's hand on her thigh, a firm presence. "Can she be my best friend?"
Noah took another bite and furrowed his brow in thought. After a moment, he smiled, "Yes she can be your bessfend. You my bessfend too. We bave tigers."
…..
Olivia had fallen asleep on the couch shortly after lunch, and Amanda felt like she was intruding now. Noah was sleeping too, head buried in his mother's lap, a stuffed tiger standing no chance of survival in the grip he had on it. It was such an intimate moment, she felt out of place.
She bit her lip and fought tears.
The quiet seeped in, consuming her and telling her that it was time to leave. She'd intruded enough by waking the older woman from her sleep, it was time to go home and give mother and son some time alone.
She stood up, ready to gather her things, when Olivia's voice broke the silence. "Come lay down with us, honey." She muttered softly, voice raspy with hints of sleep.
Amanda looked at the spot next to Olivia. It did look very comfortable. Maybe because it was right next to the brunette. Maybe she didn't want to leave, and napping with them was a good reason to stay.
"Cmon," Olivia continued, brushing her fingers through her hair. "He was due for a nap and Could use one too. Let's go lay down in my bed and we can relax."
How the hell was she supposed to say no to that?
She nodded, not able to find the right words, or any words for that matter, and watched as Olivia picked her son up. He was still sound asleep when they walked into the bedroom, and Olivia set him down on the right side of the bed. Olivia laid down next to him and he immediately curled into her body.
Amanda took a deep breath before climbing in next to Olivia. She wanted to touch the other woman. Rest her hand on her waist or brush her fingers through her hair. But she was nervous. It was just a nap, there should be any pressure.
She felt Olivia reach back and grab her hand, pulling it around her body, and Amanda sighed, relieved that the older woman was the one to initiate the contact. She scooted closer, spooning Olivia from behind, hand resting under the other woman's on her stomach.
An overwhelming sensation washed over her. She knew that, if things were really going to be as serious with Olivia as they were starting to get, she needed to talk.
If Olivia was going to end it, she'd rather it be sooner than later.
Because when she thinks about it, telling Olivia what she was planning to, was going to be the determining factor of whether or not Olivia would be able to really handle her.
She buried her face into Olivia's hair and inhaled softly. Her lips brushed against the warm skin of the other woman's neck, and she felt a shudder.
God, she hoped Olivia meant it when she said she wasn't going anywhere.
More soon….. if you review.
Anna